Estimated Reading Time: 23 Minutes

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Boyz Chilin

Ness and Sonic approached Popo's door. The hall was alive with the distant sounds of conversations and muffled laughter. Ness raised his fist and knocked on the door, revealing Popo in his usual parka.

"Sup, bro—wait, wha?" he said, scratching his chin with a gloved hand, his head tilting as if trying to piece together a puzzle he hadn't expected.

Sonic casually pulled Ness closer, throwing an arm around the boy's shoulders and flashing a playful peace sign at Popo. With a confident wink, the hedgehog chimed, "We're here~!" His grin was wide and full of mischief.

Popo blinked, his eyes shifting between the two. Something about their arrival together felt... off. But he decided not to question it—these two were his bros, after all. Besides, it was party time! With a shrug and a chuckle, he stepped aside, holding the door open for them to enter.

The warm buzz of chatter and faint music filled the air as Sonic and Ness made their way into the spacious living room.

Sonic wasted no time, plopping down beside Toon Link on the big, plush couch, throwing one leg casually over the other. Toon glanced up from his drink with a small nod, clearly used to Sonic's high energy. Meanwhile, Ness settled into the love seat off to the side.

Popo: "Alright, fuckerz, let's get this party started!"

Popo tossed a drink to each of them with a grin, his aim spot-on despite the casual flicks of his wrist. Toon Link, Sonic, Pit, and Ness all caught their cans mid-air, the metallic clink of cold aluminum ringing through the room.

Ness hesitated, the can cool against his palm. Without a word, he leaned forward and set it on the coffee table, the faint thunk barely audible over the sound of the others cracking theirs open. He wasn't a drinker, and everyone there knew it.

Meanwhile, the rest of the crew wasted no time. Sonic popped his can with a sharp hiss and raised it in a mock toast before tilting it back. Toon Link and Pit followed suit, their laughter spilling out between gulps. Ness watched idly from the love seat, his hands clasped together as the others chugged their drinks like it was a competition, the cans tipping back almost in unison.

Ness: "Wait, Pit, you drink now?"

Pit: "Uh…"

Sonic: "Holy shit! Angel boy ain't doin' some holy shit."

Toon: "Hahaha!"

Popo: "Haahaahaa!"

Pit: "W-well, I haven't seen Paluntena around, a-and she uh… Well…"

Sonic: "Damn, Pit. You're a bad boy now."

Pit: "I am not! I just… Wanna give it a try."

Popo: "Say, where is she?"

Pit: "I don't know. It's really starting to scare me."

Sonic: "Maybe that's why you're drinking."

Pit: "Probably yeah."

Toon: "I'm sure she'll show up."

Pit: "She's never been gone this long…"

Popo: "Hmm, maybe she's uh… Yeah I don't know."

Sonic: "Eh, it's Paluntena. She does this shit all the time. She's fiine."

Pit: "You think?"

Sonic: "Yeah, don't worry about it. Get loose and party!"

Pit: "Y-you're right! Nothing can hurt her. She's a goddess. She can take care of herself."

Popo: "That's the spirit!" *Smokes a blunt*

Toon: "Oi, Ness, Mate, where's my fellow Blondie?"

Ness: "He said he's busy."

Popo: "Nooo! Is he not comin'?"

Ness: "He is, he's just-

Sonic: *Snickers*

Ness: "What!"

Sonic: "Cumin."

Ness: "Grow up."

Sonic: "Hahaha!"

Popo: "Haaahaa!"

Toon: "He's busy with what?"

Ness: "He's in a heated rank match as we speak."

Toon: "Tch! Why's everyone bailin' out on our Thursday hangouts?"

Ness: "He's not bailing. He'll be here."

Pit: "He better. I love that lil guy."

Ness: "He's taller than you."

Pit: "Haha! You're right."

Toon: "Hey, weird question, but uh… Why'd you two come together?"

Ness: "Huh?"

Toon: "You and Sonic."

Sonic: "We always arrive together. Whatchu mean?"

Popo: "You guys arrived in peace though and next to each other. That shit never happens."

Toon: "Yeah, you always trip him, Sonic."

Sonic: "Ness is bein' a lil bitch and forced me to walk with him the whole way."

Popo: "How romantic~"

Ness: *Blushes* "R-romantic?! Eww, no! Gross. I would never."

Sonic: *Shudders* "Same here. If I were to be gay with a man, it wouldn't be that guy."

Everyone else: "Ooooooh~"

Ness: "What!"

Popo: "Did you hear that Ness? He said not with you, haahaa!"

Ness: "Good. The feeling is mutual."

Sonic: "Nah, you know you want me, Cheddar Biscuit~"

Ness: "Pssh! Ha! You're funny. I would rather die."

Sonic: "Mhm, yeah, sure. That's why you got jealous when I started talkin' to other smashers."

Toon: "Jealous? Wait, wha?"

Ness: "I wasn't jealous! I just didn't want to be around them."

Sonic: "Because you were jealous. Face it, Cheddar Biscuit, you wanted me all for yourself~"

Popo and Toon Link exchanged a glance, their expressions a mix of confusion and amusement. Toon leaned in closer, cupping his hand near his mouth to whisper, "A-are they flirting?" His wide eyes darted toward Sonic and Ness, who were deep in their lively back-and-forth.

"Nah," Popo muttered with a smirk, his voice low but laced with certainty. "It's just their usual banter." He leaned back slightly, crossing his arms as a quiet chuckle escaped him. "And it's hilarious as ever."

Toon nodded slowly, still watching the duo, a faint grin tugging at the corners of his lips. Whatever it was, it was hard not to be entertained.

Ness: "And another thing! You are the one always bothering me when I'm out and about."

Sonic: "You seem so lonely. Guys, wouldn't you approach him if you saw him sittin' all alone reading some geeky book?"

Pit: "I would~"

Toon: "Yeah, I mean we're friends. Why wouldn't I?"

Popo: "Duh, I love Ness."

Sonic: "See? And I see him alone a lot."

Ness: "The others would just say hi and respect my space. You, on the other hand, love to linger even though it's clear that I don't want you around."

Sonic: "It's obvious that you tellin' me to fuck off is a tsundere thing. I ain't gonna fall for that. Because when I did ignore ya, you got all jealous and bitchy."

Toon: "I'm confused. When was this?"

Sonic: "Earlier today."

Toon: "Do you guys hang out with each other all the time now?"

Ness: "Unfortunately."

Sonic: "He meant fortunately. Bro loves me!"

Toon Link and Popo glanced at each other once again.

Toon: ["It really feels like they got somethin' goin' on."]

Popo: ["Nah, it likes us, they're just close."]

Toon: ["But they're flirtin'."]

Popo: ["They always did this, remember?"]

Toon: ["Not this bad. They arrived next to each other. Without Lucas. Isn't that a bit odd?"]

Popo: ["Meh, I think you're lookin' too much into it."]

Toon: ["I dunno, Mate. Have you heard about the Ness allegations? He's a lil sus now."]

Popo: ["Oh yeah! Ask him. I'm curious."]

The two shifted their attention back to the group, where Sonic, Pit, and Ness were still caught up in their lively exchange. Their words overlapped in a blur of quick-witted remarks and easy laughter, the energy between them filling the room.

Toon Link straightened in his seat, the faintest crease of determination on his brow. Clearing his throat, he let out a deliberate ahem!—sharp enough to cut through the chatter.

The noise died down as all eyes turned toward the green motherfuckin' swordsman. Sonic leaned back casually, his smirk suggesting he was half-expecting Toon to deliver some kind of punchline. Ness sat up straighter, tilting his head curiously, while Pit shifted slightly, his wings rustling softly as he turned his attention to the Hylian.

Toon: "Oi, Ness, Mate, I got another question."

Ness: "Ok."

Toon: "Um, so like, you've heard of the allegations against you, yeah?"

Ness: "How could I not…"

Sonic: *Snickers*

Ness shot Sonic a sharp glare, his eyes narrowing with unmistakable irritation. The look was piercing enough to make anyone squirm, but Sonic merely turned his head away with a casual hum.

Toon: "So like, are you bi?"

Sonic: "Hahaha!"

Popo: "Haaahaaa!"

Pit: "Wait, really?!"

Ness: "No I'm not bi!"

Sonic: "Someone's in the denial~"

Ness: "I'm not! I didn't bang half the roster! You guys know this."

Sonic: "He couldn't even if he tried."

Ness: "Sonic, fuck off."

Pit: "Wait, so it isn't true?"

Sonic: "Do you really think this nerd could pull anyone? Let alone half the roster?"

Ness: "I mean… I never tried."

Sonic: "Whoa! Is Cheddar Biscuit over here tryin' to say he got game?"

Ness: "I've never actively pursued anyone. Relationships and dating just don't align with my priorities."

Sonic: "Excuses."

Toon: "Like I know the internet is full of shit, but the way you two kinda talk to each other makes it sound like you two are… I dunno, hiding something?"

Ness: "Wwhat!"

Sonic: "Yeah, what? Hell no!"

Pit: "Wait, you two are dating?!"

Popo: "Nah, Toon's just super sus."

Toon: "It's just a lil weird."

Sonic: "We're not datin'. I'm straight."

Ness: "So am I."

Sonic: "Debatable."

Ness: "You-

Sonic: "Bro's in love with Lucas."

Pit: "I knew it!"

Ness: "I'm straight! I don't have feelings for Lucas. Come on guys, he's my best friend."

Sonic: "They suck each other's dicks."

Popo: "Haaahaa!"

Pit: "They do?!"

Ness: "NO! WE DON'T DO THAT!"

Sonic: "Bro's too defensive."

Ness: "Sonic, will you shut the fuck up!"

Sonic: "Now he wants to silence me because I'm spittin' facts."

Ness: "This is why I hate it when you're around me."

Sonic: "Nah, he loves the attention I give him."

Toon: "So wait, sorry to interrupt again."

Ness: "Why're you asking so many questions tonight?"

Toon: "I'm tryin' to get to know you more since you ditched me for years."

Everyone else: "Oooooh."

Ness: "I…"

Toon: "I deserve all the questions."

Ness: "Ffffine."

Toon: "So what's up with you and Leaf?"

Popo: "Oh shit! That's right. You got her preggos."

Ness: "I DIDN'T—*Sighs* I didn't get her pregnant."

Toon: "So what was that video that Snake uploaded about?"

Ness: "Red thought I did and tried to kill me. I simply did what any sane person would do, and defended myself."

Popo: "So you pulled him into your room?"

Pit: *Gasps* "D-did you two do the… The… Whoohoo?"

Ness: "WWHAT!"

Popo and Sonic: "Hahaha!"

Ness: "NO! I pulled him in because we were getting too much attention from my neighbors. I cleared up everything and now we're friends."

Sonic: "More like boyfriends."

Ness: "Will you shut up for one second?"

Sonic: "Geez, fine. Fuck!"

Ness: "Don't believe anything you guys see in the internet. None of that is true. It's all because of Isabelle spouting lies about me because of Nate. He was the one running around in my image doing things."

Popo: "Riiight, Nate. Isn't he in Ondett still?"

Ness: "It's Onett, and yes. He's still there."

Popo: "When's he comin' back? That guy was chill."

Toon: "Chill? He lied to us and never apologized!"

Pit: "Wait, who?"

Ness: "Everyone calm down. Let's not talk about my clone today."

Pit: "Clone?"

Toon: "He's a fuckin' piece of shit!"

Ness: "Ok, look, he's done a lot of bad, but he's actually a pretty good guy."

Toon: "There ya go, backin' him up again."

Ness: "Can we not?"

Popo: "Yeah, let's change the subject."

Toon: ["Whateva."]

Pit: "So wait, I'm confused, who's this-

Knock!

Knock!

Popo sprang up from his seat, his face lighting up with excitement. "That's gotta be Lucas!" he exclaimed, his voice brimming with enthusiasm. The ice climber practically bounced to the door, pulling it open with a cheerful grin.

Sure enough, there stood Lucas, the shy blonde clutching his hands together as if bracing himself. He offered a small wave, his expression timid but polite, and stepped inside. Without a word, he made his way to the living room, sliding into the seat next to his favorite brunet.

Sonic and Ness exchanged a brief glance, their expressions unreadable but tense. Seeing Lucas now felt... odd. The memory of their mini argument still lingered, but that wasn't the only reason. Just yesterday, the two of them had been hiding in Lucas's closet. And what they overheard—his secret—had changed the way they saw him entirely.

Sonic: "So uh, Lucas, how's it goin'?"

Lucas: "I'm doing fine, thank you."

Popo: "Bro, where were you?"

Toon: "Yeah, why're you late?"

Lucas: "I was in a heated rank match. Sorry about that."

Ness: "Did you reach diamond?"

Lucas: "You know I did~"

Ness: "Lucky. I can barely get out of plat in League."

Lucas: "That's because you suck."

Ness: "League is a more complex and difficult game."

Lucas: "No, you just suck."

Sonic: "Hahaha! So true."

Ness: "I love my friends. I love how supportive you two are."

Popo: "Damn, was it hard?"

Sonic: *Snickers*

Lucas: "A little, but I won in the end."

Pit: "What was hard?"

Sonic: "His dick!"

Ness: "Sonic!"

Sonic: "Hahaha!"

Lucas: "W-what! N-no, the game."

Sonic: "Riiight, the game. Sure."

Lucas: "Wha?"

Ness shot Sonic a sharp glare, his eyes narrowed with silent warning. Slowly, he shook his head, the gesture clear—a signal for the hedgehog to keep quiet.

Popo: "Anyway, glad everyone could make it because I have a fun story to tell." *Smokes blunt*

Toon: "Oh?"

Popo: "So *Coughs* Tina and I were hangin' out right?"

Ness: "Tina?"

Popo: "Yeah, dude, we hang out from time to time."

Ness: "Oh."

Sonic: "Jealous?"

Ness: "No!"

Popo: "Anyway, we were at one of her splatoon frat parties gettin' all high and shit, then suddenly some tweaker came in and started screamin' about you Ness."

Ness: "M-me?"

Popo: "It was fuckin' crazy. He talked about how you like punched this punchin' machine. Apparently you were at Splatfest and made a whole scene. You became a legend there."

Ness: "Really? I remember going to the party, but I didn't do anything memorable."

Popo: "Nah, everyone was talkin' about you."

Toon: "Mate, you're so popular this year."

Ness: "I've noticed."

Pit: "Whaaaat! I wish I was there."

Popo: "But yeah we were talkin' about you. Tina said you're joining her band."

Toon: "Wha?"

Ness: "Y-yeah."

Popo: "That's fuckin' crazy! Are you the same Ness?"

Ness: "It's not that crazy."

Popo: "Bro, *Coughs* you're gonna go on stage and play in front of a shit tone of people. The Ness I knew would never."

Ness: "I'm trying to put myself out there more."

Sonic: "Nah, it's cuz he wants to fuck her."

Ness: "That's not true!"

Sonic: "You're right, I forgot you're gay."

Ness: "I feel like you want me to be gay."

Sonic: "Dude, it's obvious. Stop hidin' in the closet."

Both Ness and Sonic widened their eyes and froze.

Popo: "Ugh, you guys good?"

Ness: "I-I'm not hiding in anyone's closet! I would never do that."

Toon: "Ugh, Mate, he never said you were hidin' in anyone's closet in particular."

Ness: "There's no closet! What closet?"

Sonic: (Shit! I didn't mean to say that…)

Lucas: "Uh… Are you ok, Ness? You're sweating."

Ness: "I'm not sweating! I would never. Especially not in a closet. W-why would I ever be in one in the first place. For so long too."

Sonic: "Hey, Ness-

Ness: "And the fact of just being trapped with someone in a closet is such a weird thing. Like what're the chances of that happening?"

Toon: "That's oddly specific."

Popo: "You ok, bro?"

Ness: "I'm fine."

Sonic: "He's fine. You know how he is. He's autistic."

Ness: "I'm not!"

Sonic: "Just oversharin' some nonsense."

Ness: "I'm just explaining."

Toon: "But why?"

Ness: "Huh?"

Toon: "You didn't have to explain anything. Sonic was just makin' a gay joke."

Ness: "Oh, I… Haha… I guess I took it literally."

Pit: "Wait, Ness, you hid in someone's closet?"

Ness: "NO! I-

Pit: "That's weird. Isn't that stalking?"

Ness: "No, you got it all wrong! See I-

Pit: "It's not stalking?"

Popo: "Pit, he didn't stalk anyone. It was a joke. Ness just took it too literally."

Pit: "Oh. I guess I did too. Haha…"

Popo: "But yeah anyway, I'm super psyched to hear you play, Ness."

Ness: "Oh, right. Yeah, the band."

Lucas: "I'm also excited. I think it's cool that you're finally getting out there."

Ness: "Thanks, Lucas."

Toon: "We'll all be there for sure."

Sonic: "Bro's been playin' the guitar if y'all wanted to know."

Popo: "Ayyye nice! I play guitar too."

Ness: "You do? Wow, I should've gone to you for help."

Popo: "Nah, I suck though."

Toon: "I wanna hear you play."

Pit: "Yeah me too!"

Sonic: "Can't be worse than this, bozo."

Ness: "You're the bozo."

Popo: "You guys really wanna hear me play?"

Everyone: "Yeah!"

Popo: "Alright, fine. But don't judge me. It's been a minute since I've last played."

Popo excused himself and made his way to his room, returning moments later with a guitar in hand. He sank into his recliner chair, the familiar creak of the cushions accompanying his relaxed posture. With a quick adjustment of the strings, he began to strum the simple, familiar melody of a song.

The tune was far from complex—nothing more than the basic notes of a beginner's song like "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star." His playing was a little rough around the edges, his fingers stumbling over the strings as he focused on keeping the rhythm steady.

Even though his performance was far from perfect, the group didn't hesitate to cheer him on. Sonic clapped with exaggerated enthusiasm, Toon Link gave a supportive thumbs-up, and even Ness offered a genuine smile. It wasn't about the skill; it was about the effort, and Popo had their full support.

Toon: "Nice! I liked it."

Popo: "Thank you, thank you."

Lucas: "Good job, Popo."

Ness: "That was great. Just keep practicing."

Sonic: "That was sick! Probably better than what Ness could play."

Ness: "Fuck off."

Lucas: "I wanna hear you play, Ness."

Ness: "M-me?"

Pit: "Yeah! I wanna hear!"

Ness: "I don't have my guitar on me so…"

Popo: "You can borrow mine."

Ness: "Oh it's ok. I don't want to dirty it."

Popo: "Wha? Nah, dude it's fine. I wanna hear you play too."

Sonic: "Can't talk your way outta this one, Cheddar Biscuit."

Ness: "Fffine. But I'm far worse than Popo."

Popo walked over to Ness with a wide grin, handing him the guitar with a flourish. Ness glanced nervously around at the group, his fingers fidgeting with the strings as he looked at each face in the room. His eyes quickly flicked to Sonic, Toon Link, and Pit before landing on Lucas, whose hopeful gaze made him feel even more self-conscious.

With a small, almost reluctant sigh, Ness did a few tentative strums, tuning the guitar to his liking. He adjusted his grip, trying to shake off the nervousness bubbling in his chest. The soft hum of the strings soon turned into a melody, the rhythm filling the air with a surprisingly smooth sound. To the group, it was as though an expert had taken the reins, the music effortlessly flowing from Ness's fingertips.

Lucas's eyes widened as he watched his crush play, a soft blush creeping up his neck. The sound of the guitar was like a dream, a melody so romantic it sent his mind racing. He couldn't help but imagine Ness serenading him on a blanket under the sun, the two of them lost in a peaceful picnic, the notes drifting between them like a love song.

Sonic, sitting back, tried to convince himself that he didn't care. But the truth was, watching Ness play had an unexpected effect. His fingers danced across the strings with a practiced ease, filling the room with a sound so captivating that Sonic found himself listening intently. There was a depth to the melody, and despite his reluctance to admit it, Sonic was hooked.

A small spark of jealousy flickered in his chest. He was supposed to be the charming one—the one who could do anything and win anyone over with a wink or a smile. But here was Ness, effortlessly pulling off something that seemed both romantic and manly. The way he made it look so natural irritated Sonic, yet a part of him admired it, even if he didn't want to.