(Hazbin Hotel: Evening)
Fiona walked inside the new and improved hotel with an impressed expression, liking the new changes compared to before. She had only been gone for a week, and so much has changed within said time. Everything had gotten a complete makeover, not to mention there was even a bar at the front desk, something she wasn't expecting, yet she wasn't complaining.
From the corner of her eye, she could see a little cyclops demon running around cleaning up, and even stabbing a few cockroaches with a needle for some reason. Must be a fetish of some kind, she wasn't sure.
"Fiona, you're finally back!" A red blur had barrelled into her, and Charlie gave her a bone crushing hug, making the tigress wince.
"Charlie…can't…breath." Fiona said while trying to bring air into her lungs. The princesses strength was a bit unexpected for her, but she was glad to know that there was muscle behind that jacket of hers. Or at least, she liked to think so.
Charlie realizing this, let go of Fiona and rubbed her head sheepishly. "Hehe, sorry about that, I'm just so excited. We actually have help with this hotel other than you, Zeke, and Katherine."
"Really now? That's new. I kinda expect you to be dejected still after the whole fiasco on 666 news." Fiona said cheekily, making the princess laugh nervously.
"Yeah well, Zeke managed to cheer her up when we got back, and he gave her an idea that we plan on putting into motion soon." Vaggie said while walking up to the pair.
"I see. Speaking of which, where's Zeke and Katherine? I gotta talk to them about something." Fiona asked her harem sisters, but for some reason, Charlie and Vaggie just blushed and looked away.
The tigress realized what was happening due to the duo's looks, and just deadpanned before sighing. She could even hear the screams and moans of pleasure coming from upstairs due to her sensitive hearing. "Satan damnit. Alright I guess I'll wait until morning. I would join them, but I'm still a bit tired from my last job."
"That's rare. Normally you're the first to go up there and join them. Any reason why?" Vaggie asked with a raised eyebrow, making Charlie curious herself.
Fiona grinned before replying back. "Well I figured it would be Kat's birthday present. I'd be a cock blocker if I were to get in the way of her private time. But rest assured, I'm taking my turn when I get the chance. You two should do the same when you get the chance~"
Charlie and Vaggie blushed heavily as Fiona walked away to explore around the new and improved hotel. The duo looked at each other, before nodding as if they had a silent conversation with each other and going to their room.
(Zeke and Katherine's room)
(Lemon)
"Master, am I going to be punished more? I can't wait anymore~" Katherine moaned lustfully as she was face down ass up on the bed, all while being blindfolded and her hands being tied behind her back. A large amount of cum was falling from her gaping pussy, and her whole body was covered in semen.
The succubus was wearing a black corset top with the chest area cut out exposing her nipples, fishnet pantyhose that were ripped where wet and stuffed pussy was, and black collar around her neck with a long chain attached to it.
"Well, that depends. Are you going to be a good girl from now on, or am I going to have to punish you more than usual~" Zeke growled lustfully as he cracked Katherine's whip against her ass, making the succubus squeal in delight.
"Yes master! I'll be a good girl! I'll be your personal fuck toy! I'll be your whore~" Katherine moaned out lustfully. Zeke yanked the chain attached to Katherine's collar, pulling her up to his chest and growled huskily in her ear as his fully hard cock was pressing itself against the succubi's ass cheeks.
"Really now? Then here's what's going to happen. You're going to suck my dick like the cock hungry slut you are, and maybe I'll give you your favorite cream as a reward if you do a good job. How does that sound~" Growled the dragon sinner, barely keeping himself from just outright fucking Katherine into unconscious.
"Thank you master! I'll start right awa-EEEE" Katherine squeaked as Zeke spanked her ass with his clawed hand.
"What was that, Bitch." Zeke growled while letting out his aura, further arousing the succubus.
"I'm sorry daddy! I'll get to work right away!" Katherine lustfully moaned out as Zeke turned her around and made her face his erection. But before Katherine could get to work, Zeke grabbed a bottle of whipped cream and sprayed it over his manhood.
Katherine immediately knew what her boyfriend did, and she licked her lips as she swallowed her dragon's entire cock down her throat like a pro. She could taste the sweet creamy delicacy from her second favorite cream, and it made sucking her master off all the better.
Now if only they had gotten strawberries coated in chocolate, then that would make this so much better, but they'll work with what they had. The cream Zeke had bought wasn't ordinary whipped cream, but a special kind made by a succubus in the lust ring. It tasted sweeter compared to regular whipped cream, on top of boosting the sex drive of anyone who ate it.
Katherine moaned as Zeke grabbed her horns and forcibly jammed his cock down her throat. Her eyes rolled to the back of her head in pleasure, and Zeke used his tail to roughly smack the succubus on her large ass, causing a red imprint of his tail to form on her ass.
"You're doing pretty good for a whore. Tighten up that mouth of yours will you?" Zeke growled as he increased his thrusts, with his balls smacking against Katherine's chin. Said succubus did what she was told and used her natural succubus physiology to constrict her mouth to the point where she could be considered a living fleshlight.
Soon she felt Zeke's huge cock twitch, and she braced for the incoming semen that was about to flood her mouth and go down her throat.
…But it never came. The moment Zeke was about to climax, he pulled out at the last second, leaving saliva and whipped cream drooling down her mouth. "D-Daddy, What's wrong?"
Zeke grinned as he forced the succubus on top of him, while taking off her blindfold. Katherine looked down at Zeke with confusion before understanding dawned her face. "Wait, do you want me to work for my reward, master?~"
"No, I've just decided to break you like you seem to want. So I'm going to try something new that I've been working on for a while." Zeke said, before his form started to glow. When the glow died down, Katherine didn't notice any change so she was about to question her boyfriend, until she felt a hand smack her ass. She looked behind her, only to look on in shock.
There it was, another Zeke looking at her with its fully hard erection pressing against her already stuffed asshole.
Katherine grinned in excitement, before turning to the real Zeke. "Ok time out. Since when the hell did you learn to clone yourself?"
"Hehe, well I remembered a technique from a certain show you love so much, so I decided to try and replicate it. But these clones are more durable, so they can take a pounding." Zeke said, with a bit of pride in himself.
"Oh really, well I expected you to use as many clones as I want in the future. For now I'll stick with one clone, because I'm actually starting to get a bit tired." Katherine said, as the clone behind her leaned down to growl in her ear while using his claws to cut the succubi's hands free.
"Oh don't worry, Kat. We plan on fucking you good and hard until we're satisfied~" Clone Zeke said, and in on swift motion, jammed his cock inside Katherine's asshole, making her squeal in delight.
"FUCK, H-HE FEELS JUST AS REAL AS YOU TOO! THIS IS THE BEST BIRTHDAY PRESENT EVER!" Katherine screamed.
"Glad to know you're enjoying yourself Kat, because the real fun starts now~" The Zeke under her said as he thrust his hips upwards, plunging into Katherine's pussy.
Both Zeke's started thrusting hard and fast into the succubus, the one in her asshole grabbing her arms and pulling them back. The real Zeke was greeted with the sight of Katherine's massive breasts bouncing in his face, and he channeled lightning magic into his fingers while pinching her nipples.
The clone decided to follow his creator's example, and decided to channel lightning magic at the tip of his dick. Katherine squealed as her sensitive nipples were being stimulated, and electric shocks caused throughout her body. Both of her holes were filled, and she lost control of her body's functions, causing her to climax continuously. Her dragon just kept finding new ways to pleasure her, and she loved him for it.
"So which hole do you like having stuffed more you whore? You're ass, or you're pussy?" The clone growled lustfully as he yanked the chain attached to Katherine's collar, while using Katherine's asshole like it was his personal toy.
"I-I DON'T KNOW! MY PUSSY FEELS AND MY ASS FEELS LIKE IT'S ON FIRE, AND I LOVE IT. I DON'T CARE ANYMORE, JUST KEEP FUCKING MEEEE!!!" Katherine squealed in ecstasy.
"Glad you're enjoying getting treated like my personal cocksleeve. How about we wrap this up." Zeke said, and his clone nodded in agreement as their thrusts began to increase, making Katherine's eyes roll to the back of her head.
"YES! YES! DO IT! FILL MY HOLES WITH YOUR SEED! DON'T WASTE A DROP AND FILL ME TO THE BRIM!!!" Katherine screamed at the top of her lungs. The dragons felt their cocks twitch, and with a primal roar, they filled the succubi's holes with their seed.
Katherine's eyes went blank as she felt both of her holes being filled to the brim. She felt the last of her consciousness fade as she passed out from the amount of pleasure she felt. The clone pulled out of the succubi's asshole, and he gave a thumbs up before disappearing in a burst of lightning. Cum leaked from Katherine's gaping asshole, and Zeke signed tiredly. "The things I do for you, I swear."
Zeke used his tail to pull the covers over their bodies, and Zeke fell asleep, with Katherine unconsciously snuggling closer to the dragon sinner more than she was, with his dick still in her pussy.
(Lemon Over)
(The Next Morning)
Fiona came into the bedroom, and her sensitive nose immediately picked up the scent of hot and sweaty sex. She barely managed to keep herself from stripping and having her boyfriend and harem sister fuck her, and walked towards the bed.
There she saw Katherine with her face buried in Zeke's neck, all while the dragon sinner had a hand on her ass. The blankets had long since fallen off their bodies, so the tigress was greeted to the sight of Zeke's manhood still inside the succubus, making her grin.
"Lucky bitch. You're so lucky I came here on business, otherwise I'd pick up where you two left off~" Fiona thought while licking her lips. She then crawled on the bed and got on top of the pair, and she smirked mischievously as extended her claws and went for Zeke's throat.
Zeke's eyes snapped open, and in one swift motion, grabbed Fiona's wrist and pulled her into the bed on top of him next to Katherine.
The dragon sinner flashed her a toothy grin and let go of Fiona's wrist before letting out his aura slightly. "You know, if that was anyone else, I would have broken their wrist and killed them on the spot."
"Well it's a good thing I'm not just anyone else am I~" Fiona grinned as she matched Zeke's aura, with the room being covered in a swirling red and blue aura.
Soon their auras disappeared, and Zeke gave the tigress a kiss on her lips, a kiss she fully accepted as their make out session got more passionate. Soon the pair separated, and Zeke smiled warmly at the tigress. "It's good to see you here, Fiona. I missed you."
"I missed you too, lover boy. That last job was a pain in the ass, not to mention how long it took to get it done. I'm just glad that was my last job as a full time bodyguard." Fiona sighed as she laid her head on the dragon sinner's chest.
"Really? If that's the case, then how are you going to make some money regularly?" Zeke asked.
"Well that's actually why I came up here first thing in the morning. I got a recommendation from Stolas, and he wanted to talk to you and Kat about it too." Fiona said.
"Hmmm…Zeke, what's with all the noise? Can't we stay in bed a bit longer?~" Katherine moaned groggily as she sat up from her position, before looking at Fiona. She instantly had a happy smile on her face as she gave the tigress a hug. "Fiona! It's so good to see you again. I'm guessing your last job ended today?"
"Good to see you too Kat, and no, my job ended last night. I wanted to see you guys last night, but you guys were pretty…busy, so I held off until morning. Speaking of which, did you hear what I said?" Fiona asked.
"Hm, yeah. I heard you say Stolas recommended a job for us but that was about it." Answered Katherine while putting on her glasses.
"Good. I'll call the bird, so just give me a second." Fiona said as she brought out her phone and dialed Solas's number, and put it on video call.
When the Goetia prince answered, he was in the process of dodging multiple pieces of furniture. The trio raised an eyebrow when they heard Stella in the background shouting at the Goetia prince. "GET THE FUCK OUT YOU PATHETIC IMP FUCKER!"
"Um…did we call at a bad time or…" Zeke trailed off as Stolas turned to the phone with a nervous chuckle.
"Hahaha, no not at all. Good morning you three, and my apologies for the…unpleasant sight. Anyways, I'm glad you managed to get your friends in contact with me, Fiona. I want to call in that favor you owe me on top of a job opportunity to give you." Stolas said, causing Zeke to raise his eyebrow in curiosity.
"Really? This is a surprise. It must be serious if you're cashing in that favor." Zeke said while crossing his arms.
"Yes it is. Tell me, are you three familiar with a business called I.M.P?" Stolas asked the group, with the trio raising a collective eyebrow at the name.
"I.M.P? I think I've heard of them. Isn't that the name of that company with the annoying ass jingle playing repeatedly on TV?" Fiona asked, with Stolas nodding through the phone in affirmation.
"The very same one. I was hoping you three could keep an eye on them for me." Stolas said.
"Are you sure it's not because you gave the guy running that business your grimoire?" Katherine asked, with Stolas sweating nervously a bit at her proclamation. "Don't even bother trying to hide it, Stolas. I've seen your grimoire enough times to know that it's yours, and I saw the cover of that grimoire on the commercial. That grimoire is obviously yours."
"Hold on a sec, isn't that illegal down here? Not only would you get punished for giving whoever this guy is your grimoire, but the people working under this guy would get punished too." Zeke said seriously, making Stolas sigh.
"Yes, it is illegal. That's why other than you three, no one else knows, and I'd like to keep it that way. That's why I'd like for you three to keep an eye on them." Said Stolas seriously, and Fiona widened her eyes in realization.
"You want us to be employees at this company, don't you?" Fiona asked.
"Yes I do. My little impy is looking for new hires right now, so I decided to send you three his way. Consider this as me cashing in that favor you two owe me for giving you those passes to traverse the other rings. It was quite the hassle to get those passes for the both of you." Stolas said, looking at Zeke and Katherine.
"Ugh…alright alright, we'll do it. Hopefully this place doesn't cause too much of a headache." Zeke groaned as Fiona patted him on the back.
"Oh don't worry, I'm sure everything will be fine. Oh and by the way, don't worry too much about going to the human world~" Stolas said mischievously as he immediately hung up, causing confusion to dawn on the trio's faces.
"Wait, we're going to the human world? But we're sinners, we can't go to the human world right?" Katherine asked while getting out of bed.
"Eh, he said not to worry about it, so I'll trust him on this. For now let's get ready to go to this place." Zeke said, and his mates nodded as he and Katherine got ready, while Fiona went downstairs to wait on the pair.
(Imp City: An Hour Later)
"You know, throughout my time in hell, I don't think I've ever visited imp city before. Guess I just saw no reason too." Katherine said as she looked around at the many demons around her, with most of not all of them being imps.
"You're only saying that because you almost never leave the hotel without Zeke." Fiona said with a deadpan, making the succubus shrug.
"Hey I hate going outside sometimes. Especially when I don't want to deal with the arrogant douchebags out here." Katherine said.
"You should have seen her when we were alive. She absolutely refused to go outside unless I or her parents were there with her." Zeke said with a chuckle, causing a pout to form on Katherine's face.
"Oh come on Zeke, you know I was a shut in back then. I can function outside just fine damnit. Anyways enough about me, where is this fucking building?" Said the succubus, trying to change the subject.
Zeke looked at the address on his phone that Stolas sent him, and looked up to see a huge corporate building with horns on the sides. "I think this is the place right here. Looks…cozy."
"Really? What gave you that impression?" Fiona said with a raised eyebrow.
"Well…ugh, you know what, never mind. Let's just go inside." Zeke grumbled as the trio walked inside and took an elevator to the designated floor.
Soon the group came in front of a door with the logo of I.M.P above the door. They walked inside, and the place looked rather…average. Granted, Zeke wasn't expecting anything fancy, but still, can't a dragon dream?
"Hm? Looks like they're in a meeting. Think we should let them finish?" Katherine said as she spotted a sheet of paper taped on the door that said "meeting in progress" in red lettering.
Zeke didn't seem to care, because he started knocking on the door, making Fiona and Katherine sweatdrop. "Or I guess…we could just invite ourselves in like always."
However, no one answered the door, making everyone a bit annoyed. The dragon sinner banged on the door loudly this time, and this time they heard a male voice shout from the other side. "WHAT?! CAN'T YOU FUCKING READ, DIPSHIT?!"
"We're here for the job openings you have, cocksucker. Now if you don't mind, you think you can-" Zeke was cut off when the door suddenly flew open, revealing an imp.
The imp was looked similar to a jester, with red skin, a narrow head with curved black and white striped horns on his head, black lines running down his eyes which had red irises with yellow sclera, a black heart-shaped skull symbol on his forehead with white splotches covering the right side of his face, and large wide hands. He wore a torn black coat with red buttons, black cowboy boots, and black fingerless gloves with eye-like orbs with cross-shaped irises on the back of the glove.
"You're hired!" Before the trio could even react, the imp had suddenly pulled them inside the meeting room and slammed the door shut. Zeke, Katherine and Fiona were now inside a large office with a whiteboard at the front of the room, and a long desk in the middle of the room, holding three more occupants.
Before the trio could question what was going on, the tall imp suddenly thrust an eraser in Zeke's hands before pointing at the whiteboard. "You and your whores, fix this shit. We're still in the middle of a meeting."
Zeke, Katherine,and Fiona's eyes began to twitch at the imp's remark, but just shrugged. The dragon sinner created a clone, and the clone got to work on fixing the whiteboard.
"Um…sir, what are you doing? We can't just-" Another imp tried to say, but was cut off when his boss spoke up.
"Not now Moxxie. We've got new recruits, and I'm actually trying to get them up to snuff, unlike a certain someone." The tall imp said as he began to drone on, making the imp that tried to speak sigh in annoyance.
The imp had red skin with white freckles, pointy white hair that leads up to his black and white striped horns, and yellow sclera with black slitted pupils. He wore a navy-black coat with red buttons and white cuffs, black pants that fitted his digitigrade legs, a white shirt that ended with a black turtleneck, a large red bow-tie, and fingerless gloves.
"Um…we just got here and we don't even know what we're getting ourselves into." Katherine whispered, but another voice spoke to them as they sat down, with Katherine sitting on Zeke's lap and Fiona sitting next to them.
"You've still got some time before it's too late. Might want to leave while you can." The female next to the sinner duo said while being glued to her phone, causing Zeke, Katherine, and Fiona to look at her.
The female was a hellhound with beautiful white and grey fur, long voluminous silver hair that reached her lower back and was swept to the side revealing her dark grey ears which were pierced, white irises with red sclera and slit pupils, and a curvaceous body. Her attire consists of a large black spiked choker around her neck, a tattered grey shoulderless crop-top which is held up at the neckline by a series of criss-cross spaghetti-straps that form an inverted pentagram, black shorts that were tattered at the hems with a white crescent moon detail on the right side, black fingerless gloves, and thigh high toeless stockings that hugged her digitigrade legs.
Katherine whistled in approval at the sight of the hot hellhound next to her, and licked her lips with hunger. "Why hello there."
"Piss off, succubus." The hellhound said with boredom, make Katherine pout.
"Aww, you're no fun. Can you at least-*moan~*!" Katherine tried to say, but was let out a soft moan when Zeke suddenly gripped her sensitive tail.
"Come on Kat, we just met her. The least we can do is wait before we come on to anyone." Zeke said, making the succubus pout, but nodded reluctantly. She wanted another harem sister damnit, and this sexy hellhound looked like she knew how to have a good time~
The hellhound grew curious and looked over to the pair, before her eyes widened in shock. She recognized the pair sitting next to her, how could she not. These two were the same duo that humiliated the exorcists two days ago. Then her eyes locked onto Zeke's and she felt a tingling sensation run through her entire body.
Her Hellhound instincts were telling her to claim this handsome stud. She would admit, the dragon was a lot more handsome in person than on the screen. She snapped out of her daze when Zeke flashed her a kind smile. "Nice to meet you. Name's Zeke by the way."
"Um…Yeah, you too. Uh…I'm Loona." The now named Loona said with a visible blush on her face.
"Shit! I sound like a fucking school girl right now! Did I do my makeup shitty today?!" Loona thought with embarrassment as she looked back at her hellphone, but still took occasional glances at the dragon sinner.
Katherine noticed the hellhound's blush, and started to come up with multiple plans to get the hellhound into the harem, which made her giggle pervertedly.
"Alright fuckshits, I have something to say, so listen up. Now I know business has been…a bit slow lately. Now it's no one's fault ok, I'm not naming any names here…*cough cough Moxxie* Now does anyone have any bright ideas on how we can get business drumming up again?" The tall imp asked his employees.
The sole female imp of the group stood up suddenly with sparkling eyes and an excited smile on her face, as she spoke with a southern accent. "What about a carwash?!"
The female imp like the other imps had red skin, large horns with white stripes protruding from her head, short messy charcoal black hair, black irises with yellow sclera, thick eyelashes, and a beauty mark under her right eye. She wore a cold-shoulder black crop-top with the straps being held by two golden buttons, black fingerless gloves, black torn denim-pants, and black toeless footwear, which exposed her hoof-like toes.
"Um…miss?" Zeke said while trying to get her name.
"Oh sorry hun. Ma name's Millie, sugar." Millie said with a toothy grin, happy to see new faces in the office.
"Right. Nice to meet you Millie. Anyways, I don't want to be rude, but this is hell. I doubt anyone in this shithole will give a shit about cars being cleaned." Zeke said, Millie nodded in understanding, seeing his point, before sitting back down.
"See. The new guy gets it. Come on Peak, you got any ideas?" The Imp boss asked, completely getting his name wrong.
Zeke's eye twitched in annoyance but he didn't bother correcting the imp. He ran into people like this guy in the past, people who would get his name wrong on purpose just to piss him off. It didn't work then, and it's not working now.
Katherine, feeling her boyfriend's irritation, quickly spoke up. "What about pop-up ads? Those usually get people's attention. Hell, I know they get my attention."
"Ok succubus, listen here. We may be demons, but we're not trying to be shit stains of society. Well…more than we already are, but come-on guys, the money isn't gonna come in itself." The boss said.
"Ok…what about the occasional bodyguard job. Those usually pay well, and we can probably advertise it well if we do it right." Fiona said with a shrug, not really caring about the meeting.
"And risk getting my asshole fucked by a homosexual cannibal? Absolutely not! Come on people, think. We need ideas here!" Said the boss before thinking of a brilliant idea, or at least it was to him it was. "Oooh, what about a billboard?"
"We can't afford a billboard sir." Moxxie said with crossed arms, until his boss wrapped his arm around Moxxie.
"Very helpful Moxxie. Really glad you're in the room right now." The imp pushed Moxxie away before turning to the rest of his employees. "Oh Hello, have you all forgotten what type of service we provided?"
"Ok, time out." Zeke said as everyone looked at him. "I have two questions. First off, Who the fuck are you supposed to be? Second, what exactly do you guys do for this business?"
Katherine and Fiona nodded in agreement. Stolas had failed to inform them on what exactly they'd be signing up for, so it would be nice to get more details about what they would be doing.
"Oh well I'm glad you asked Meak. My name is Blitzø, the "ø" is silent by the way. As for what we do, let me show you." The now named Blitzø said, getting Zeke's name wrong again as he pressed the on button on a remote,
The nearby TV turns on, showing the three imps and Loona murdering humans from the human world. Blitzo whacks a man in the face with a mallet, Moxxie is blown away firing a shotgun through the mouth of a man tied to a chair, Loona swings a man back and forth in her mouth, and Millie decapitates someone with a harpoon and laughs.
Blitzø and Millie could be seen eating popcorn as they watched their work on screen with pride. "Ahh, those were the good times."
"Oh yeah, I think I'm gonna like it here~" Fiona grinned sadistically while grabbing a handful of popcorn herself. If she would be killing people, then she would probably enjoy being around these imps and the hellhound.
Zeke's mind was elsewhere, barely even paying attention to the TV. "Blitzø, huh? I could have sworn I heard of that name from somewhere. Where the hell have I heard that name before?"
Moxxie groaned before speaking up. "We don't need reminding sir, considering you blew most of our salaries on an obnoxious TV ad last week. One that you then additionally paid to have run for a full three hours on a channel...nobody watches."
"The fuck? So that's why all I saw was that commercial was the only thing I saw on that channel." Katherine said, with Zeke looking at her with a raised eyebrow.
"You watched an TV ad for 3 fucking hours?" Zeke asked.
"No, only for an hour at best. For how shitty that jingle is, it's actually pretty catchy. Plus I only started paying attention when the jingle started playing." Katherine said with a shrug.
"Uh…hey, Excuse me? What's "obnoxious" about a super-fun jingle, alright? It's a fun little distraction when an advertisement's spittin' bullshit!" Blitzø said while getting up from his spot on the floor.
"The sad thing is…your not fucking wrong. We know someone who loves musicals herself." Zeke said with a groan.
"The reason is because people love musicals, right sir?" Millie asked with confidence.
"Exactly Millie, and we're basically doing a musical." Blitzø said while doing jazz hands, before looking at Moxxie with a hurt expression on his face."Are you going to crush my musical theater dreams like my dad did?"
"Ugh…Sir-" Moxxie tried to say, but was cut off by Blitzø.
"Cause, right now? All I see is just my dad's asshole talking to me! Crushing my dreams of being who truly am inside." The imp boss said as he clenched his fists and crocodile tears fell from his eyes.
"Are you tryin' to crush his dreams, Moxxie?" Millie asked.
"I…wait what?" Moxxie, confused, tried to come up with a response, but ultimately failed.
Millie came face to face with the well dressed imp and spoke flirtatiously. "I thought I knew you, Mox."
"Wow Moxxie, are you really going to crush the guy's dreams like that? I thought you were better than that." The dragon sinner said with a smirk, playing along with messing with the imp as Moxxie tried to reply.
"Not you too, Zeke!" Moxxie said indignantly, all while Loona snickered at the imp's expense.
"Dick move Moxxie." Katherine smirked mischievously.
"And here I thought my opinion of you would be good. It turns out I was wrong." Fiona smirked, making Moxxie sputter.
"I can't believe you Moxxie. Even after I made you employee of the month." Blitzø said as he showed a badly taken picture of Moxxie in a photo frame.
Moxxie sighed with defeat before he relented. "Ugh, Okay sir! I'm sorry. A commercial jingle is not comparable to musical theatre. Nobody actually likes the jingles."
"Hey speak for yourself, I actually like the shitty jingle. It's catchy." Katherine sent a glare towards Moxxie at that last comment.
"I liked it." Millie said simply.
"Do not…*points at Millie* Please don't agree with them in front of me." Moxxie said.
"Ok, I'm confused, what the hell is this jingle you guys are talking about?" Fiona asked with curiosity, with Zeke nodding, wanting to know himself.
"Oh, hold on a second. I've got it saved on my phone, I'll show you." Katherine said, as she brought out her phone and hacked the TV in the office. The TV glitched for a moment before an old style countdown showed on screen.
"Hi, there! I'm Blitzø! The "ø" is silent, and I'm the founder of I.M.P.!" Blitz says as he gestures to the logo as it appears on screen, then disappears to show Blitz in two different outfits. The first image showed him in a black outfit burning down an orphanage, while the second showed him in a white robe with a fake angel halo putting trash in a trash can. "Tell me, viewer. Are you a piece of shit who got yourself sent to hell? Or, are you an innocent little tooth fairy that got "FUCKED" over by someone else?"
The commercial then cuts to a demon guy wearing an Ohio sports jersey, giving a testimonial, while Blitzo holds a cardboard sign in frame that reads "Some guy who hired us!!" "After lovingly killing my wife for FUCKING THE DELIVERY MAN! You could imagine my surprise when I wound up here in hell after the state of Ohio killed me. I really wish I could stick it to that YAPPY JOGGER who saw me hiding the body!"
The commercial cuts back to Blitz holding Stolas's grimoire while Millie and Moxxie are behind him in the background arranging lit candles on the floor in a pentagram, before a portal appears, knocking the two imps away.
"Well, luckily for you. Thanks to our company's special access to the living world, we can help you take care of your unfinished business by taking out anyone who screwed you over…" Blitz trailed off as he walked next to the portal before falling backwards into it. "When you were alive!"
(Jingle sequence)
"When you want somebody gone and you don't want to wait too long."
"Call the immediate murder professionals."
"Hand grenade or cyanide. We'll make it look like suicide."
"The immediate murder professionals."
"We do our job so well."
"Because we come straight up from hell."
"We'll kill your husband or your wife."
"We'll even let you keep the knife."
"We're the immediate murder profession-"
*BANG*
The jingle suddenly cut off as on the screen Moxxie accidentally shot a kid passing by with a sniper, when he was trying to aim for the woman in the distance. Blitz and Millie just looked at Moxxie, and said imp was looking on with shock and horror.
The scene changed showing an operating room, and the boy that was shot was wheeled in by a pink and blue nurse respectively.
"Doctor, he's not responding!" The pink haired female nurse said, although her voice strangely sounded masculine.
"Cool water, stat!" The blue haired nurse yelled in a panic, and the pink-haired nurse whacked the boy in the face with a bucket of water, doing nothing but leaving a large welt on his face. "It didn't do anything!"
The head doctor rushed over and prepared defibrillators for both the nurses and himself. "Dammit! I'm not losing another one."
Everyone has their defibrillator paddles over the boy and the doctor shouted. "CLEAR!"
They all zap the boy and somehow by some miracle, the boy woke up.
"...Holy shit, It actually worked." The doctor said in disbelief.
Blitzo, Millie, and Moxxie are waiting outside the boy's hospital room. Blitzo is reading a magazine, while Millie is trying to comfort Moxxie, who looks devastated. The doctor comes out of the room with a clipboard. "He appears to be in stable condition, but he'll need surgery. *looks up from clipboard* Now, what insurance provider do you freaks have?"
The trio of imps looked at the doctor strangely, before Blitz spoke up. "The fuck is insurance?"
A window breaks and the boy's hospital bed flies out. The boy is lying unconscious on the bed, while Millie, Moxxie, and Blitz are holding on for dear life as they plummet screaming to the ground. The bed is stopped by a rope that becomes tangled around Blitz's foot, until Blitz slams his face into the bed, making the rope snap and they all continue to fall to the ground.
A final shot of the I.M.P logo is shown on screen as the jingle concludes.
"Kids die for freeeeeee!"
Zeke and Fiona sweatdropped at the ridiculousness of what they just watched, before the dragon sinner spoke up. "Ok, question. …How the fuck did you guys film that last segment?"
"Eh, let's just say I know a guy and leave it at that." Blitzø said with a shrug.
"Can I just mention that that last incident was Loona's fault. Dispatch is supposed to give us the right info on the target. It's very simple." Moxxie said as he pointed at said hellhound, who was watching videos of Moxxie getting hurt.
"Oh sit on a fat dick, Moxxie." Loona said with boredom while rolling her eyes.
"YOU sit! Sit on... a... and the... d-- DO YOUR JOB DAMNIT!!" Moxxie tried to come up with a retort, only to fail, making Katherine sweatdrop.
"Wow, nice comeback Mox." Fiona said sarcastically as she deadpanned at the imp.
"Hey, now. We don't blame our screw ups on Loona, okay?!" Blitzø hugs and nuzzles Loona, who snarls in anger and embarrassment at him in response, mostly due to Zeke watching them. "She didn't do anything wrong~"
"...Are you kidding me, sir? She's awful!" Moxxie said with annoyance at his boss's actions.
"Really? She doesn't seem so bad to me. I mean granted we've only just met, but she looks like a cool person." Zeke said as he rubbed Loona's head affectionately, making the hellhound blush and causing her tail to wag.
"He's right, Mox. I mean what's so bad about Loona here?" Katherine asked, feeling curious?
Moxxie just sighed, before he started explaining past events that made his opinion of the hellhound so low.
(Flashback Sequence Commence)
Loona was sitting at the front desk reading her hellhound monthly, until the desk phone started ringing, with the sound of cute puppies barking coming from the phone as she answered. "Hello, I.M.P."
Millie's voice came from the other side, and it sounded like she was in a panic. "Loona, I got stabbed! Call Mox–"
Loona quickly got disinterested in the conversation and hung up the phone to continue reading her hellhound monthly.
Blitzø was walking towards Loona in his office and presented a gift for the hellhound with a satisfied smile on his face. "Happy Adoption Anniversary, Loonie! I got you a little somethin'."
"Is it a cure for syphilis?" Loona asked simply, knowing full well that wasn't her present. Her adopted father sputtered for a reply, giving her the answer she expected as she snatched the box out of Blitz's hands, and she angrily slammed it on the ground. "THEN I DON'T WANT IT!"
Suddenly, a large swarm of spiders emerge from the present box and swarm Loona up to her neck. "UGHHH, WHAT THE FUCK?!"
Loona looked out the window to see Blitzø there pressing his face against the office window. "I'm sorry! It was spiders!"
Loona, annoyed, just deadpanned at her misfortune. "God fucking dammit."
Loona is sitting at her desk, watching an online video of Charlie performing "Inside of Every Demon is a Rainbow" on her computer. Moxxie approaches her with a flyer in his hands, and speaks up with confusion. "Um, e-excuse me. Did you just fax me an ad for weight loss?"
"No." Loona said simply while snickering a bit.
"Wha, W-Why would anyone send me this?" Moxxie asked while scratching his head in confusion.
"C'mon…" The hellhound looked up at Moxxie and smirked mockingly. "You know exactly why."
Loona was rummaging through the fridge in the office break room, trying to find something to soothe the killer hangover she was experiencing, until she found a container with avocado salad inside. She snatched the container from the fridge and yelled to anyone who could hear her. "Whoever left the fucking...avocado salad in the fridge, I'm taking it, because I have the worst fucking hangover right now!"
Millie looked at the hellhound scarfing down the salad with a raised eyebrow as she spoke. "Why would you drink on a work night?"
"I'm hungover from this morning, dumbass!" Loona said with annoyance just as Moxxie entered the break room.
"Uh…isn't that my lunch?" Moxxie asked, pointing his tail at the red box in Loona's hands.
"Y'know what?! I can't take this assault right now! I need to blow off some fucking steam!" Loona dropped the box on the floor, before kicking it into Moxxie and running out of the building while yelling.
Loona runs up to a succubus lady passing by on the other side of the street pushing her baby in a stroller, until the hellhound kicks the stroller high into the air before storms off, all while the demon lady stands there in shock and disbelief at what just happened.
At the front desk, Loona spoke up to Blitz who was drinking water next to Moxxie. "Blitzø! That clingy rich asshole is on the phone again! Says it's urgent and wants to talk to you! Sounds a little DTF-y."
Blitzø groaned as he slammed his cup of water on the ground and shouted with annoyance while crossing his arms. "Oh, GOD DAMNIT, it was one time! I swear, If I hadn't slept with that privileged asshole, none of us would have access to the living world."
Moxxie just stares in stunned silence at his boss. "...You what now?"
Loona, feeling annoyed, shouted at her adopted father. "BLITZØ!!!"
"I HEARD YOU ALREA–"
"Sooooo, what can I do you for this time, Stolas?" Blitzø said on the phone, talking to the one he got the grimoire from.
Stolas is shown talking on his phone from his fancy mansion as he spoke. "There's a political candidate causing trouble up on Earth for a few of my associates. He's trying to convince people global warming exists."
"Doesn't it?" Blitzø asked with confusion.
"Well... yes. But more people die if nothing is done about it. And it gets lonely here~" Stolas wined.
Blitzo deadpanned but saw the bird's point. "Okay, well. Yeah, I guess that makes sense."
"You know what happens when I'm lonely, Blitzy?" The Goetia prince spoke through the phone, making Blitzø groan in annoyance.
The imp boss pulls his phone away and talks under his breath. "God-fuckin'-dammit."
"When I'm lonely, I become hungry. And when I become hungry, I want to choke on that red (bleep) of yours... (bleep) your {bleeped) and lick all of your (bleep), before taking out your (bleep), and (bleeped) with more teeth until you're screaming (bleeeeeeeeep) like a FUCKING baby--!
Blitzø, who's visibly disturbed, snaps his hellphone in half, smashes it with his desk phone, tosses said desk phone away, pulls out a blender, puts the hellphone pieces inside, and somehow blends them into a liquid. Blitzø turns and hands the blender to Loona, who was standing nearby. "Eat this. And then y'know that bridge over the freeway?"
Loona, who finished chugging the liquid phone, spoke questioningly as she raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, what about it?
"Shit off it!" Blitzø said.
(Flashback Sequence End)
"Ok, I fail to see how that last one is Loona's fault." Said Fiona with a raised eyebrow.
"Look, the point is, Loona is a valued member of our family, and we don't get rid of family." Said Blitzø while standing next to the hellhound, who held a brief smile at her adopted father's words.
"For once, I agree with him. If there's one thing we don't do, it's that you never turn your back on family." Zeke said seriously, making Blitzø nod approvingly at his words and causing Loona's smile to grow a bit as she blushed.
Katherine realized what her boyfriend just said, and looked at him with a smirk. "Babe, have you been watching fast and furious again?"
"...No?" Zeke said, although it sounded more like a question than an answer. The succubus raised an eyebrow not believing him for a second, until the dragon sighed. "Ok, maybe a little bit."
"Sir, we aren't a family! You are the boss! We are the employees! You treat Loona like she's some troubled teenager! She's more like a meth-addicted homeless woman you let man the phones!" Moxxie shouted as the hellhound flipped him the bird while still looking at her phone.
"That is offensive! Without homeless people, I wouldn't have HALF the joy and laughter I do in this life!" Blitzø said as he pressed his face against the window to see a homeless demon begging for money, all while a succubus walked away from him with disgust on her face.
Moxxie then realized something as he quickly spoke up with annoyance in his voice. "Also, While we're on the subject of "family", can you please stop finding me and Millie outside of work?"
"Wait, the fuck? Are you a stalker or some shit?" Fiona asked, feeling a bit weirded out.
"Of course not! I just want to make sure my employees are ready for anything. Thank you very much!" Blitzø said indignantly.
"Right. And besides, it's not that big of a deal, sweety." Millie said, trying to defend her boss.
"Excuse me...WHAT?!" Moxxie shouted in outrage. "Have you forgotten the time he was in our fridge! The time he snuck in our apartment! What about when he was filming us having a moment!"
Zeke raised an eyebrow at the two imp's before his eyes flashed with realization."Oh I get it now. You two are married, aren't you?"
"Yep! We've been happily married for a long time now!" Millie said cheerfully while hugging Moxxie, who blushed a bit at the contact.
"Aww, good for the both of you. Hopefully your marriage lasts longer than most of the other sacks of shit down here." Katherine said with a smile as Millie returned it in kind.
"Look, the point is you keep finding us and invading our private life. Just…stop…doing that." Moxxie growled at the end, looking at Blitzø.
Blitzo just shrugs before responding. "I don't see what the issue is. Is there somethin' you don't want me seein'?"
"No, There isn't!" Moxxie said with embarrassment.
Blitzo speaks as Loona snickers. "You a baby-wiener-haver?"
"I can say he's about average, Blitzø. He's rocking a solid 6-incher, maybe even 7 if we're pushing it." Katherine said, with the imp's and hellhound looking at her with confusion.
"Um…how exactly do you know that? I doubt you fucked fatty over there at some point." Loona asked with confusion as the succubus grinned.
"I can accurately guess a man's dick size, regardless if he's wearing pants or not. It's just something I got when I came down here, and I can't turn it off for some reason." Katherine said with a shrug, before her grin turned predatory. "Besides, there's only one cock that's allowed inside me, and that's this one right here~"
Katherine suddenly grabbed Zeke's cock through his pants, making the dragon let out a slight groan of pleasure as he was getting slightly erect. She could feel her dragon's manhood twitch at her touch, and she licked her lips in hunger. Loona feeling curious, decided to grab Zeke's growing manhood as well, and her eyes widened with shock and disbelief.
"What the fuck! He's so fucking huge! That can't be real, there's no way what I'm feeling is real!" Loona thought with growing lust as her cheeks redden.
"Hahahaha, as bold as always Kat. Hm, maybe I should join in on the incoming fun~" Fiona grinned lustfully as she joined the hellhound and succubus in fondling Zeke's manhood.
"ABSOLUTELY NOT! Stay away from my Loony manwhore! That goes for all of you too!" Blitzø shouted in rage at the three.
"Hm…no. No, I don't think we will." Zeke grinned mockingly at the imp boss, who got even more angry at the sinner corrupting his baby girl.
"Alright enough! Your not fucking my Loony over my dead body! And Mox, I don't judge the boring ass couple stuff you and Mills do, so don't…judge…me!" Blitzø shouted.
Moxxie, feeling annoyed, voiced his opinion. "Oh, I do judge you, sir! Quite a lot, actually."
"Mox, he's our boss!" Millie said to her husband.
"No no no, it's fine Mills, your husband is just... how do I say this without being offensive? …Retarded." Blitzø said smugly.
"Does immaturely insulting me make you feel better about your sad, single life?" Moxxie said with annoyance.
"It actually does, and your average meat stick doesn't change that either." Said Blitzø.
Loona decided to speak up as she stopped fondling Zeke's crotch and glared at Moxxie. "Let's be honest, the only reason you have a wife in the first place is because you're easy to manage, unlike some people in the room!"
Millie slammed her hands against the table, and looked at Loona with anger while flipping her off. "No, he's not, you bitch!
Loona started growling at Millie as Blitzø shouted. "Do not talk to my receptionist that way! She's sensitive! And you! Keep away from my daughter you fucking lizard!"
Blitzø looked solely at Zeke as he said that, making him roll his eyes. He was about to speak up, until Loona turned her glare onto her adopted father. "How many times do I have to say this Blitzø?! Stay out of my sex life, for fuck sake! If I want to ride this dragon's dick, then I'm going to, whether you like it or not!"
Katherine started giggling pervertedly as drool fell from her mouth when she heard Loona's words. Her mind started conjuring up multiple scenes, with all of her harem sisters surrounding a fully naked Zeke with his erection revealed to the world.
Fiona grinned in excitement at the prospect of possibly working with the hellhound, maybe even fighting her in more ways than one. Meanwhile, Zeke just chuckled at the sight and he was about to voice his opinion, until another voice spoke up and broke the tension in the room. "You guys are all fucking assholes."
Everyone turned to the voice that spoke and Zeke, Katherine, and Fiona's eyes widened when they saw the boy Moxxie shot in the I.M.P commercial lying on a table looking at everyone with annoyance.
"How the fuck is he alive? Actually scratch that. A better question is why the fuck is he down her in hell with us?" Fiona asked, with her mate and harem sister nodding, wanting an explanation themselves.
"Our target didn't really specify which target we had to take out, so we couldn't really do anything with him until we got confirmation from our client." Loona said, informing the trio.
"Oh, shut up, kid! You're lucky to witness this!" Blitzø said to the boy with an indignant glare.
Moxxie pinched the bridge of his nose and grumbled. "Ugh, this company is such a mess!"
"Alright, let's get back to talking about my outfit." Said the imp boss, trying to change the subject.
"Uhhh, I don't think anyone was talking about that, Blitzø." Zeke said with a raised eyebrow.
"Which is why I'm tryin' to get that ball rolling. So, how does it look? It's good, right?" Blitzø asked his employees, but the human boy detached the tubes to the heart monitor and spoke up.
"It's been a literal hell having to pretend to be paralyzed so you fuckshits wouldn't kill me! But, now I want that. I want death!" The boy said before pointing at Blitzø. "You are a selfish, greedy clown. And I'm a kid! We're supposed to like clowns! Even the creepy ones!"
Moxxie tried to speak up to defend his boss, but the kid cut him off. "If I wanted to hear from a spineless jackass, I'd rip out your spine and ask you some shit."
"That's my husband you're talking to, you damn brat!" Millie yelled, trying to defend her husband.
The kid laughed as he responded with a grin, making Millie angry. "That's your husband?! I figured you were a slut. But, I didn't know you needed dick that bad!"
He then turned to Zeke and leveled him with a disgusted stare. "As for you, what the hell even are you? Are you so confused by your race you can't decide between a lizard and a dragon? Make up your mind."
Zeke's eyes turned red with slitted pupils, and the boy turned to Katherine, who was glaring at him. "You're probably the biggest whore I've ever seen, not to mention your into beastiality fucking that lizard. That's just sad."
Katherine's eyes flashed a menacing pink as her aura was coming off of her in waves, with her killing intent being focused directed at the brat who dared to disrespect her boyfriend. The brat then turned to Loona and Fiona as the former spoke. "What? What about us?"
"Nothing. I don't talk to dogs. I'm a cat person. And even then I wouldn't be caught dead with an oversized sluty cat who had to compete with other sluts just to get some dick." The boy said with a mocking grin towards the cat and hound pair.
"I suggest you be very careful with your next words, brat. Otherwise things are about to get messy." Zeke said, directing his full killing intent at the little shit, who began shaking.
Katherine suddenly got an idea as she tapped on her phone a bit, before putting it away in her jacket pocket. Soon after, Loona got a notification from a number she didn't recognize, and she read the contents of the message. When she finished, her eyes widened as she looked over at Katherine who just winked at her.
"Oh fuck! Guys, I just got a text from our client. Guess he was the right target after all." Loona said with a sadistic grin on her snout.
"Who?" Blitz asked.
"Him." Loona's grin got wider as she pointed a thumb at the kid.
The kid pointed to himself in disbelief. "Wait…Me?
"Yup." Loona said smugly while looking at the text Katherine sent her. Clever bitch must have hacked her phone and put her number in her contacts.
"Wait a minute, you're saying they wanted us to kill an actual child?" Blitz asked, wanting confirmation.
"That's what they're sayin', Blitz." Loona said.
"Huh...Well, Christ on a stick. I guess there is a God." Blitzø grinned evilly as he drew a flintlock pistol from his coat pocket and was about to fire it at the brat, until Zeke, Katherine, and Fiona rushed the boy.
Katherine took off her glasses, revealing the red lines she was familiar with, and traced them to cut the boy's arms and legs off, which made him scream in agony. Fiona then grabbed all of his severed limbs before burning them to ash with her flames.
Zeke then turned to the three imps and Loona while giving them a smirk. "You guys joining? Because if not, we'll just keep the fun to ourselves."
They all grinned sadistically before everyone pounced on the still alive boy.
Blood covers the screen, then reveals Blitzø, Zeke, and Moxxie kicking Eddie's corpse, Millie and Fiona stabbing him with a knife and flame covered hand respectively, all while Loona and Katherine were recording everything on their phones.
"Y'know, folks? With this company, I really wanted to prove that we're capable of doing the same things anyone else can. Like killing people!"
Blitzo and Moxxie are shown wearing full hazard gear, dismembering Eddie's body with a hacksaw and chainsaw respectively. Blood splats on the screen again, then shows the group by a dumpster putting the boy's body parts in a garbage bag.
"So, from us here at the Immediate Murder Professionals group, we promise to settle your unfinished business or your money... is gone and you're never getting it back, and you can write us a bad review but we'll play dumb to it, because it's Hell and no one fuckin' cares."
As Blitzo does the voiceover, he hugs Moxxie, Millie, Loona, Zeke, Katherine and Fiona, with the hellhound's phone flying out of her hands.
"Y'know, even though this kid was a target... he's still a child. And it's important that we handle this going forward respectfully." Blitzø said softly while wrapping his tail around everyone, making the group smile.
(Human World)
On the news channel, the mother of the now deceased boy was crying while holding a poorly drawn picture of her son. A male news reporter holds a microphone up to her looking disinterested, while the headline on screen says, "Mom sucks at drawing own kid".
"Please! If anyone has seen my little Eddie, please contact us at–AHHHH!" The sobbing mother screamed as a bag was dropped in her hands, revealing her son's dismembered and bloody corpse. Eddie's mother and the news reporter look up in shock as the camera follows their gaze. Blitzo, Moxxie, Millie, Zeke, Katherine, and Fiona are shown looking down on them through a portal.
Blitzø smiled and waved at the mother before saying cheerfully. "You're welcome!"
"You fucking suck at parenting by the way!" Katherine yelled at the mother just as the portal closed.
(Chapter end)
A/N: And…done. Sorry for the long wait. I've been a bit busy and haven't had much time to work on my stories not to mention trying to get One Helluva Dragon transferred to Wattpad.
Had a bit of fun with this chapter, and now we're finally done with the pilots. I gotta admit, the Helluva Boss pilot was a little shorter the expected, but not unwelcomed. This bitch is already near 10k words, so this should be enough.
Hope you guys enjoyed the chapter. Make sure to ollow and favorite, and go follow my new Wattpad account InfamousPuma69420.
See you all next time.
Bye-bye!
Next update: Bloodied Fangs