Chapter 63: Gathering Pawns
Sera paced around the television room, and on the screen, was a muted Caesar talking about something nobody in the room cared enough unmute. His wild and boisterous attitude had seemed to have died and been replaced with a more suitable somberness.
However, there were clear attempts for him to regain that joy he had for the games. It was lost whenever the camera cut to the audience.
For once in the history of the games, those Capitolites didn't look like beasts baying for blood. They were openly upset and devastated.
Zephyr had joked that those people had finally discovered empathy only to be told to shut up by Huxley. He didn't want to think or talk about the Capitolites at all. He wanted to do his job as a mentor to Wells as best as he could and go back home.
"Have you seen Haymitch?" Chaff's gruff voice brought her back and she turned her head away from the window. "Got saved by a hair, thanks to that Peeta boy—you know the loud one from the so-called star-crossed lovers. Poor fella. He's gonna have to choose between himself and his girl."
Wells laughed drunkenly and Leora steadied him before he crashed into the table. "Haymitch got reaped too?"
"He did and then he got away because of—"
"I know who you're talking about…I just didn't expect them to pick him."
"You're surprised?" Chaff looked around the room.
No signs of their escorts or any attendants, just former victors, drowning in their sorrows.
Leora was sitting next to Wells, nursing a glass of liquor. Huxley in one corner of the room with his eyes trained on Sera by the window while Zephyr was next to her, his face buried in his notebook.
Not one person in the room looked like they wanted to be there. They'd all rather be at home or the ones mentoring. Sera and Zephyr were the only ones who really had the choice of being on that train back to the Capitol.
"You know they wanted him gone since the whole incident at the last Quell." Chaff carried on, shaking his head. "And…they thought it was going to be something to have the victor of the last Quell take part in this one. Two birds with one stone kind of thing."
Leora snorted and rolled her eyes. "They need to get over their silly little grudges and choke."
"Drink to that." Chaff and Leora clinked their glasses and took a harsh swing of their drinks. "You know what I don't get is why you…"
"Volunteered?" Leora finished for Chaff. The older victor laughed and refused to shrink under the gazes of her fellow victors. "Consider it a passing good deed."
"A good deed?" Huxley echoed and shared a look with Sera.
"We all know why you did it," Zephyr added.
"I'm doing you all a favor." She replied. "She saved my life, now I save hers. I don't owe anyone anymore."
Chaff looked between the two and grabbed the bottle of hard liquor. He poured some into his, Leora's, and Well's glasses with his one hand. He looked up at a silent Huxley.
"Want some, Foret? Or are you still doin' the whole sober thing you've got goin' on?"
"Pass." Huxley picked up a book, a storybook that Sera was sure belonged to her sister.
"More for us," Chaff said and spared a glance at the quiet pair of Sera and Zephyr.
Sera avoided his gaze. She avoided looking at him and pretended he wasn't even there despite his giant figure. It wasn't like she didn't like Chaff or had some grudge against him, she couldn't bear the sight of his missing limb.
Seeing it reminded her too much of Ramiel. Her heart squeezed itself whenever she even thought about him. He'd begged her to stay and let Zephyr take over as a mentor instead but she didn't listen.
"You know," Chaff began. "I'm surprised you didn't volunteer this time around."
Zephyr lazily looked up from his notebook and tilted his head regarding his words. Chaff repeated what he said before only to be ignored for a second time. He returned to his book without a reply and pretended that he was alone in that room.
For the third time, Chaff repeated what he said, only then did Zephyr respond with a simple. "I heard you." He didn't look up.
"You didn't answer me." Chaff replied, glaring at Zephyr.
"I don't have to." He flipped over a page and stopped. His brows knitted together in silent focus while his eyes desperately scanned the page, committing it to his memory.
Wells shifted uncomfortably in his seat and looked around the room for anyone to step in. Nobody moved, not even Leora. She had a glint in her eyes and a small eager grin on her face like she was expecting something more to happen.
"That's enough." Wells grumbled out and kneaded his forehead with two fingers. "He's young and I'm not as young as I used to be and unlike that boy from Twelve, he doesn't have his girl to worry about in the arena."
Chaff shook his head and turned away. "Of course, he doesn't. He's not stupid, just weak. I don't even know how he managed to pull off a win. Got a 'three' for his score during his game and somehow by some stroke of luck, managed to make it through."
"Same way the rest of you did: luck." Zephyr replied and Chaff laughed. "Let's be honest here, we all got lucky and our luck just ran out."
Chaff nodded and looked at Sera again as he said. "I wouldn't want to go back in either if I had the choice."
"No one does." Huxley covered his face.
His eyes were moist last Sera had seen and wondered if he was going to start crying again like he did before they'd left for the station back in Five. She moved across the room and pulled a chair next to him, passing him a handkerchief under the table in case he started crying.
"That one over there does," He said, pointing to Leora. "And so did Brutus, Enobaria, Mags—"
"—Mags volunteered?" Wells and Leora said at the same time like they'd been shocked.
They shared a horrified look and then looked at Chaff who nodded somberly. Leora covered her mouth in horror, covering herself with the blankets around her. Wells had stopped moving.
"Isn't Mags Flanagan eighty?" Zephyr asked, putting his book to the side. "There weren't any age exemptions or something?"
Chaff shook his head. "Not that I know of. You know those sadistic bastards would never miss an opportunity to see a fight even if it's sweet old Mags."
"And you'd never miss an opportunity to be in a fight." Wells countered.
"Mags volunteered for Annie Cresta, I see why she did it. That girl looked like she was choking when her name was called out."
"Annie?" Sera's heart dropped. "Annie Cresta? She was reaped?"
It made no sense for her to be forced back. Everyone in Panem knew she was not in her right mind since she'd won.
Occasionally Finnick would talk about her. He told her how she was only in her right mind around him, her father, and Gaven—Annie and Finnick's childhood friend whom Sera had only met once during Annie's Victory Dinner. She'd gotten better but it was nothing like how she was once.
Nobody wanted to see a broken victor back in the arena. Nobody wanted to see the ugly side of the games so clearly and in their faces. They'd prefer to stuff those undesirable ones in some far dark corner to be forgotten like old toys.
But they reaped Annie of all people.
Annie's reaping was a warning or a threat.
Sera should've predicted it when her own name was called out.
"Have none of you watched the recaps this year?" Chaff asked instead of answering, frustrated. "Everyone on the train I've spoken to has talked about her and Mags nonstop. If it's not that then it's about Cecelia or those 'star-crossed' lovers from Twelve."
"Cecelia was reaped?" Leora asked, getting out of her seat. "No one volunteered for her?"
Chaff made a sound and covered his mouth with frustration. "None of you watched the recaps." He stated.
"What's the point? We'll see who got reaped at the Training Center anyway." Wells grumbled out and stood up. "I'm gonna go and see Haymitch. You coming?"
"He's not on this train." Chaff said, grabbing him before he even got close to the door. "They put him on a separate one with Peeta Mellark and Katniss Everdeen. Probably 'cause they knew that some of us might try and attack them before we even reached our destination. I know Johanna, Cashmere, and Gloss would."
Gloss. Cashmere.
They were reaped.
Somehow, Sera expected Cashmere and Gloss' return to the arena. If they weren't reaped, one or the other would've volunteered or neither would volunteer.
Cashmere certainly wouldn't, not this time. She wasn't like Leora no matter how much Capitol had broken her down. Sera considered her much luckier than Leora or Johanna. Unlike those two, Cashmere had Gloss and Gloss had Cashmere, the same way Sera had Huxley and then Zephyr.
She was sure that Cashmere would never volunteer as long as Gloss stayed out of the arena. He was her anchor and she was his.
"Speaking of," Chaff turned his head around to look at Sera. "you're not gonna see 'em or anything?"
"I don't know." Sera replied honestly.
"You don't?"
Sera nodded. "I'm sure it's better if they don't see me."
Even if they didn't know about her involvement with Plutarch, the mastermind behind the Quell, she wanted to avoid them if she could. That ugly guilt would no doubt return the minute she saw either of the siblings or even the 'lovers' from Twelve.
Incessant knocking on the door elicited an explosion of moans and grunts from Chaff. Huxley stood up and opened the door. Outside stood Cecelia from District 8 with her arms wrapped around herself. She scanned the room silently with her puffed-up reddened eyes and ignored Huxley.
"Is…Estelle not here?" She asked after a moment of silence.
Chaff chuckled. "Well, do you see her anywhere?"
"That's why I asked." Cecelia replied, annoyed, and turned back to scan the room once more. Her heart dropped when she noticed Sera in the corner. "She traded places with Seraphine, didn't she?"
Sera gave her a tight smile. "She wanted to be with her family." She answered.
"N-no, I understand." Cecelia stammered out. "I just thought I could catch up with her for the last time."
"I didn't know you two were close." Leora sat up, her blankets falling on the floor as she reached for her glass of liquor.
Wells poured her another glass, only filling it halfway. The other half was filled with juice. One more glass and Wells was going to cut her off.
"I guess you could say that. Maybe we were…" Cecelia turned around and pressed a button.
"You're talking like you're already dead." Chaff grumbled out.
"Not everyone has fight left in them, Chaff."
"Maybe some of us should." Chaff countered. "Give them a reason to regret and show your kids that their mother didn't go out without a fight."
Cecelia smiled sadly and shook her head. "I don't want to teach them the bad stuff."
An attendant arrived. Not an avox like usual but an attendant with clear Capitol looks stood in the hall, dressed in an expensive dark gray and red uniform.
"What can I get you today?" The attendant asked politely in a thick Capitol accent and Cecelia was taken back. She turned back to the room of victors who were unphased by the attendants and carried on as they were.
"...I'll have a cup of tea, please."
The attendant bowed and blankly replied with a wait time before she disappeared around the corner of the long corridor.
Cecelia looked back and pointed at where the attendant left, trying to say something. Wells and Zephyr just nodded along as if her thoughts were loud as screams and they could hear them clearly.
"No avoxes." She managed to say.
"And no personalized compartments with tickets for passes." Sera added nonchalantly.
"Jet said the same thing."
Huxley looked up from his book. "Jet?"
"One of Six's victors." Johanna answered tiredly as she stood outside the door. "Aw, you all left me out of your little party."
"Not a party." Huxley replied. "And are you sure, he's a victor?"
"Why don't you go ask him that?" She fired back and stole Chaff's glass out of his hands. "Jet's a victor—didn't he do a stint on Caesar's show with Seraphine once? I thought you'd remember that."
Huxley nodded and pursed his lips, looking sideways before stopping. He was going to say something insensitive. Sera knew he was. He always did the same thing whenever he said something stupid or insensitive.
"Aren't District 6 victors…a little…I don't know…lost?" He asked slowly, having difficulties with choosing the right words to openly talk about the morphlings from Six.
"You mean they're all morphling addicts?" Zephyr had a small grin on his face and a twinkle in his eyes. He was enjoying Huxley's struggle. "Then, yes."
"Heck, I'd turn to morphling too if it was cheap in Eleven." Chaff joked.
"Ugh, not with that taste." Johanna laughed and held out the glass. Chaff filled it to the brim.
"Chaff. Johanna." Cecelia clicked her tongue in disapproval, shaking her head. "You two acting like alcohol isn't the same thing but worse."
Chaff rolled his eyes and took out another glass. He didn't drink the liquor like water in his usual way, he snuck a glance at a disapproving Cecelia and snuck a sip or two with his back turned to Cecelia.
"So what did Jet say?" Johanna asked.
"He said the train seemed like a cargo train—I don't know what that meant but Beetee and Wiress found it very interesting."
"Cargo train?" Huxley echoed back and Cecelia nodded. "Are you sure that's what he said?"
"I heard him loud and clear."
Zephyr touched the metal walls and dragged his fingers over them. There were clear marks of nails and indentations where shelves had been for the cargo. It made sense now why the rooms on the train were so big except for the bedrooms which were smaller than usual. "Makes sense. This is a cargo train." He said.
Johanna giggled. "We're the…cargo. They can't even pretend they care anymore and I don't even blame them."
The attendant returned with a cart loaded with ten teacups and a large teapot along with some milk and sugar on the side. There was even a stand of colorful desserts and pastries. With a bow, the attendant left the room and the door slid closed on them with a quiet 'whoosh'.
Huxley pulled up a chair for Cecelia opposite his own and poured three cups of tea, adding extra sugar to one and sliding it over to Sera. The three cupped the teacup with their hands and just stared at the table in silence for a moment. Cecelia was shaking as she brought the cup to her lips.
Johanna took a seat on the arm of the couch next to Chaff and looked around the room. "You know…" She began. "I'm surprised you decided to go back as a mentor this year."
Of course, Johanna had to address the one thing Sera had been avoiding. "Are you talking to me, Johanna?"
"Who else in here was reaped and then was spared thanks to a volunteer—certainly not me."
"Estelle asked me to." A partial truth was all she'd offer Johanna and the others. "And I thought it would only be fair that I…go back as a mentor for Leora."
"How sentimental."
"You don't believe me."
"I don't have to." Johanna breezily replied. "You're the one who's always next to President Snow."
Sera flinched. She was expecting the other victors to suspect her of being responsible or sharing responsibility for the Quell that year. But Sera kept her head cool, she had to or she'd slam Johanna to the floor.
"...I can't argue against that but I hate to tell you, I was as surprised as the rest of you when the rules were announced."
"Somehow I don't believe that." Cashmere interrupted Johanna before she'd even managed to get a sound out. She stood outside, her eyes red and puffy and a solemn Gloss next to her. "You knew, didn't you?" She asked betrayal and hurt evident in her voice.
"Hey, I was talking—" Cashmere glared at Johanna and made a move towards her before Augustus rushed towards her and held her back.
Taking in a deep breath, Sera dug her nails into the palms of her hands and steadied her breathing. She didn't let her emotions show on her face and ignored the dark gazes of her fellow victors. The District 5 victors and Cecelia were the only ones who seemed to have some concern for her.
The corridor outside the room was crowded. Victors who'd stayed away from the others or holed up in their room came out to witness the commotion. She'd give it exactly ten minutes before Peacekeepers on the train showed up to break up the gathering if a fight broke out.
Seeder, Chaff's partner, stepped forward and the crowd parted. "You better not be starting a fight in here, Cashmere."
Cashmere glared at Seeder, her eyes moist with tears before looked back at her 'friend'. "I'm…just asking a simple question."
"You look like you're about to start a fight," Johanna said and awkwardly turned to Sera with an apologetic look. This wasn't what she'd planned and even if she wanted to ask Sera that question, she didn't mean to start a commotion.
"I will if you keep running that mouth of yours."
Johanna rose from her seat, the glass in her hand, tightening. "Hey! Hey!" Seeder rushed forward and Cecelia along with Huxley rushed forward. "No, fighting!"
"Just asking a question!" Cashmere spat out and Gloss had to hold her back. Sera sat still in her seat, her mind blank. "Did you know?" She asked, her voice rose in volume and Sera was sure the Peacekeepers could hear them. "Did you know?!"
"No…" Sera answered, calm and detached. "I didn't because if I did, my name wouldn't be in there but you're free to think whatever you want—blame whoever you can think of than use your head for a minute or two to see that I had nothing to do with this!"
It would be easier for her to untangle herself from Cashmere, Gloss, and Augustus at that moment before they went back into the arena. She wouldn't have to mourn them when they didn't come back and she knew they wouldn't—not if Plutarch was planning to start a rebellion. Sera was sure that only Katniss and Peeta would come out alive, the rest she wasn't so sure.
"A-are you calling me stupid?" Cashmere stumbled back like Sera had stabbed her.
"She's not calling you smart either." Zephyr fired back. "I know you careers spend your entire lives training for the games but come on, I'm sure your brain is developed enough for you to figure out that none of those people from the Capitol would ever trust one of us no matter how we try to fit in with them."
"Now, he's the one calling you stupid." Johanna stated through her stifled laughter. "And speaking of careers, I don't know why you're acting like that, the rest of us never wanted anything to do with the games—you and your brother along with the other careers put yourself in here in the first place. Shouldn't you be 'honored' to be sent back or some bull?"
"Johanna." Cecelia called out amid the storm like a warning, shaking her head and telling her to shut up.
"You and Gloss looked proud when your names were called out." Sera added fuel to the fire Johanna and Zephyr had set while lying through her teeth and Chaff knew she was lying. "Maybe you two wanted to go back in."
He'd turned with his flushed drunken face, confused as to why she was lying. She could only hope he wouldn't talk at that moment. He got the message, turning away and pouring himself another glass. That wasn't his fight to get involved in.
"Say. That. Again." Gloss spat out.
Sera's heart shook and her insides were cold. The only thing she could feel was the sharp pain of her nails digging into her skin. "I'm not gonna change what I said. We all saw you and Cashmere—the only difference between you and Cashmere and Enobaria and Brutus was that you two didn't volunteer."
Gloss chuckled coldly. His jaws clenched and his fists tightened. He saw red and he ran towards Sera, only to be tackled to the ground by Finnick who'd rushed over. Huxley and Zephyr helped him pin him to the floor. While Cashmere was pulled back by a quick Leora and Seeder.
"What part of no fighting did you miss?" Finnick pressed his arm over Gloss' neck, almost choking him. Gloss turned from red to blue in seconds.
She froze. Her mind went blank and the voices in the room and corridor rose like a tidal wave, drowning her. She didn't know what to do and she was moving before she could even think, pulling Finnick away.
"That's enough." She said into his ears. "You're going to kill him."
Seeing her pull Finnick away, Huxley and Zephyr eased their hold on Gloss who was on the ground. He gasped for air and slowly shifted back to his normal color as the blue faded. Slowly, Huxley let go, and then Zephyr before they backed off.
Gloss stood up, being helped by Augustus. "You are so dead, Odair when I get my hands around you."
"I'm shaking and shivering in fear." Finnick fired back.
He glared at Finnick and made a move towards him and Finnick did the same. Sera tightened her hand around Finnick's wrist like a clamp and pulled him back. He looked at her and she silently pleaded with him to not fight. The last thing she needed was for him to get hurt because of her.
"He—"
"I know." She provoked him and she expected Gloss to lose his cool. She just didn't count on him to try to attack her. "I know…" She breathed out and looked at Cashmere and Gloss, her now-former friends or acquaintances. There was no fixing what just broke.
"I trusted you—we trusted you." Cashmere said, holding back a sob.
"I'm sorry." Sorry that she'd gotten her involved in something she didn't even ask to be a part of; it was better this way. It would hurt her less for Cashmere and Gloss to despise her till death than for them to die with hope for her to save them. "But I meant what I said, I didn't know or my name wouldn't be in there and I wouldn't have been reaped."
"Or she'd be exempted." Leora decided to speak up.
"Exempted." Echoed the victors in the hall and in the room including Finnick who'd pushed her behind him, like he was shielding her from the other victors.
"No one was exempted." Beetee stated. "There have never been any exemptions in the history of the games, Leora."
Leora rolled her eyes and looked around the room, her lips stretching into a grin. "Tell that to Porter."
"Porter was exempted?!" Cashmere and Johanna screeched out at the same time, glaring at each other. "That—"
"Maybe Porter was the one who knew about the games, not Seraphine." Leora went back to her nest and covered herself with her blankets. "Unfortunately, she's dead." She said with glee.
"So we'll never know if you're telling the truth." Johanna pointed out.
"Porter was exempted." Huxley spoke up, avoiding everyone's gaze. "You can ask Wells or Zephyr about it as well."
Finnick stepped forward. He was shaking with rage and Sera had never seen him so angry. "But they didn't exempt…you, even though you were sick." His voice was quiet and barely audible, almost sounding like a low rumble. He took deep pained breaths and threaded their fingers together, stopping her from hurting herself and ignoring the surprised looks from everyone.
Sera caught Cashmere's shocked and betrayed face that was replaced with hurt as she clamped her mouth shut. Sera never told her anything about Finnick and her. She never was going to.
"Well," Leora spoke up. "now that we all know Porter was the one to blame, get out or stay if you can keep your mouth shut. I want to take a nap."
The corridor cleared out and Gloss hobbled out of the room with his arms around Augustus' shoulders. Cashmere lingered around the corridor for a moment longer and stared apologetically at Sera. She nibbled on the bottom of her painted lips, opening and closing them, swallowing up her words before she turned away and disappeared down the hall.
Chaff let out a loud and tired sigh, motioning Seeder who had stayed behind with Wiress, Mags, and Beetee to close the door. Seeder followed his gestures and circled the room. She made herself comfortable on the spare couch at the back of the room inviting Mags and Wiress to join her.
Beetee didn't move, he was probably thinking about Porter's exemption or something else. Maybe he knew about Plutarch's plans. Sera was about to let go of Finnick and pull Beetee aside. She needed to know if Beetee knew if she and Zephyr were the only ones being kept in the dark or if everyone was the same.
"They should've put Five in another train like Twelve." Chaff joked, an attempt to ease the tension. "And it's safe to say those careers will not be allying with any of us."
Johanna scoffed. "Who wants to be in an alliance with them anyway?"
"Finnick and Mags were careers." Sera pointed out.
Johanna stared at Sera in confusion. "I wasn't talking about Mags or your boyfriend and don't say he's not because…" She motioned to Finnick and Sera's hands with a grin.
Finnick smiled brightly and Zephyr took one look at Huxley then covered his mouth, holding back his laughter. Finnick's shoulders relaxed and he rested his head on top of Sera's as his arms wrapped around her waist. He was relieved that for once, they didn't need to hide.
"Get a room." Johanna heckled the two. "We already have to watch those kids from Twelve go at it, I don't need to witness you two either."
"So the rumors were true after all." Cecelia said, reaching for her lukewarm tea and complaining about it as she did so.
Sera looked away. Her cheeks turned a soft pink. She didn't know what to say. Her mind had been too preoccupied with the games to even think about anything else.
"Unfortunately." Huxley replied icily.
She could picture Finnick silently trying to provoke Huxley. Her former mentor stood up from his seat with a warning. She elbowed Finnick gently, warning him to not start another fight. Only then did Huxley sit down.
Her eyelids were heavy and she was so tired, ready to fall asleep there and then. If Finnick wasn't holding her, she would've probably sat on the floor before falling asleep.
"Look at you two acting like an old married couple." Chaff laughed.
"Those two from Twelve should learn a thing or two from you two." Wells added with a chuckle.
"But, it's so much fun to watch them struggle." Johanna chimed in.
"Johanna, that's not nice." Cecelia chastised Johanna. "I think Peeta really likes Katniss."
"And Katniss is too blind to even notice."
"Who cares?" Leora fired back. "We're in this mess because those two had to go act out a stupid love story in the arena."
"You volunteered." Zephyr pointed out.
"For Seraphine." Leora reminded Zephyr, pointing at Sera as she spoke. "And I wouldn't even have to if they didn't mess up."
Sera felt Finnick pull her towards him like he was trying to attach her to him. His hands suddenly grew cold. His coldness burned her and she flinched at his touch. He apologized silently but didn't let go. She didn't make him let go either.
"They didn't exempt her either…" Wiress stated.
"...even though there was a way to be exempted." Beetee finished, reminding everyone that he stayed behind in the room. "Porter was exempted. Sera–phine was not. They were both far too…sick to go back into the arena but only one was exempted."
"Are you suggesting…" Johanna dramatically rose. "that the games, even the reaping are…rigged?" She finished.
Finnick rolled his eyes. He couldn't help but let his laughter escape. "They're rigged every other year, Jo. Everyone knows that."
"The reapings aren't exactly rigged." Beetee corrected. "They just increase or decrease the chances of certain people by removing or adding names."
"That still counts as rigging." Zephyr pointed out. "And we already knew our chances in Five. Porter not being in the games would've increased Sera, Estelle, and Leora's chances."
"They must've removed either Leora or Estelle's name then."
"Probably mine." Leora guessed and everyone knew why. They didn't want Leora to kill herself on purpose in front of Panem. If she was to die then it would be away from them, somewhere no one would see her or know what they'd done to her.
Mags made a sound, expressing sympathy for Leora but offered no words. She looked too tired to speak let alone stay seated at the back of the room. Finnick would look at her every so often. He'd ask if she wanted to go rest. And every time Mags would shake her head 'no'.
"Doesn't make sense why they didn't take Annie off then." Finnick flinched at Zephyr's words and his breathing became heavy. "Annie Cresta is worse off than you."
"W-we all know why she was reaped." Finnick breathed out, gasping for air and holding onto Sera for his life.
Johanna's face softened. "They made a mistake." She guessed. "They thought she was—"
"No, they got it right. Annie's my friend and the only victor I gave Four while Sera is—"
"Your girlfriend."
"Not exactly." He said and Johanna gave Sera a sympathetic look. "I should've given you the ring." He said to Sera and the room stilled.
A pin drop could be heard with how quiet the room became. Chaff sobered up quickly, almost falling from his seat. While Huxley put his head down on the table while mumbling about something about Talissa, Zephyr turned away to look at the window, still stifling his laughter.
Sera was red in the cheeks, turned her head down, and covered her face with her hands.
"Um, congratulations…" Beetee was confused, happy, and concerned all at the same time. "And I'm so sorry."
Sorry?
That word echoed in her head. She looked up, her insides cold while her outsides were warm. She was shivering when she turned to Beetee with a wild look, repeating his words. He looked at Finnick who avoided Sera's gaze.
Chaff let out a shaky breath and shook his head. "Seraphine…didn't watch the reapings." He said to Finnick.
"I…can tell." Finnick's voice was strained. "It's…good…she didn't."
No.
It couldn't—but it made so much sense.
They set him free and took him out from being sold, only for him to be sent back into the arena to die. It was the cruelest thing Sera could ever imagine. If that wasn't enough, they picked Annie. Everyone knew Finnick had a soft spot for Annie. Mags had taken that spot but it was for nothing, Finnick would still lose someone dear to him.
And if it wasn't for Leora, Sera would also be back in the arena.
She'd been punched in the chest, gutted hollow, and left with nothing but empty dreams. She crumbled into his arms and stared at the floor. The corners of her vision gradually darkened. She could hear Thyme and Acadia's screams in the distance and see Thyme crying over Acadia's cold and bloody corpse.
"You're going back in…" Sera said slowly, her mind racing but her mouth not catching up with it. "You're…going back in." She repeated.
"She didn't see the recaps." Chaff said to Finnick.
"This is going to be rough." Johanna's voice was shaky as she shifted around awkwardly.
"That's an understatement." Zephyr pocketed his notebook. "And here I thought Capitol's favorite eye candy would be spared from this purge."
Finnick let out a choked laugh. Sera couldn't see him but she could tell that he was holding back tears and probably hiding it with his stupid smile. "Guess they got tired of me and I'm an eyesore now."
"You called this purge." Beetee focused on Zephyr. "A purge?"
Zephyr wasn't expecting Beetee to focus on his words or him, he was taken aback and a little annoyed. For all Sera and Zephyr knew, Beetee could've known about the Quell. He was closer to Plutarch than Sera was. Yet he stood there with them and acted as if he knew nothing.
"I thought it was obvious." Huxley replied before Zephyr could get past his hostile thoughts. "Everyone picked had some history with Capitol."
"They hate most of us. It's not something new." Johanna said lazily.
"Not without reason."
"Stupid reasons."
"Still a reason." Zephyr pointed out. "You were just one of the few handfuls that said 'no' to them and you stuck by that—"
"And look where that got me." A flash of hurt appeared on her face, quickly fading and replaced by a lopsided grin. Her eyes were dark and hollow, she was lost in her memories. "They still wouldn't leave me alone but I stuck to it and I don't regret it."
"They're still sending you back."
"I'm gonna make them regret it."
He rolled his eyes and carried on. "I'm sure you will. You're still a trouble for them and so is Haymitch, he embarrassed them. Wells tried to speak out against them, and Leora tried to kill herself without their permission. As for Finnick, Gloss, and Cashmere, they've outlived their use as much as I hate to say it. Beetee and Wiress might've worked with the Capitol closely but they know too much."
"What about Annie, Seraphine, Jet, Blight, Cecelia, me and some of the others?" Seeder questioned.
"That's simple. Annie was for Finnick…" He answered softly and Finnick flinched. "Jet humiliated them as well but not on the scale of Haymitch Abernathy. He managed to use the arena against them and that's why we never got a modern urban arena ever again. You, Blight, Seraphine, and Cecelia were the emotional picks—the ones that'll make the people think that this game isn't rigged from the start."
"And the rest are just fillers—bodies meant to be discarded." Beetee guessed and Zephyr nodded. It was hard to say that he was right.
Sera was half-listening and half-focusing on Eugene's shadow that only she could see. He was looking at her with wide bulging eyes and gleefully grinning from ear to ear. He looked barely human anymore. A shell of her memories.
"...Did you know?" Sera asked without thinking.
"Know?" Beetee echoed back and nervously looked around the room. Sera repeated her question, shaking as she did so. "No." Beetee answered quietly. "No one told me."
"They shut you out too, didn't they?"
"None of us knew this was coming."
"Am I missing something?" Seeder asked.
Both Sera and Beetee ignored her. Plutarch had left them all in the dark. She hated that she understood him and saw what he was trying to do. It was a good method to keep everyone in the dark to ensure no one turned on him yet it stung. Beetee knew exactly what Sera felt.
If the two were alone, he'd no doubt complain about Plutarch. They weren't alone. Not all of the victors around them could keep their mouths shut. Johanna and Chaff were the obvious ones. She wasn't so sure about Leora or Seeder. She didn't know Seeder as well as the rest of the victors.
"So they rigged the reaping to make sure some of us would go in." Huxley spelled out.
"Seems that way." Johanna said. "I don't understand why they'd send Seraphine back. Isn't she Snow's favorite?"
"Not Snow's favorite." Sera replied quietly and Johanna didn't believe her at all. "And it's probably for appearances' sake." Sera tried to defend herself halfheartedly. She, herself, had no clue why she even picked, and as much as she hated to rely on others for answers, she was hoping someone in the room would have something for her. "I'm not that close to him."
"Somehow I doubt that."
"Then my name wouldn't be picked."
"Or maybe you're the rigged victor."
And there it was.
That was what Sera wanted to know. The thought never occurred to her. It was like she was in a haze since her name had been called out, her mind a mess and her heart too tired to function. Even in Finnick's arms, she felt half-dead and half-alive.
Johanna got up and circled the room. She covered her mouth. Her eyes were wide. "Oh, that makes sense now. You are—no, were the one they wanted to rig to win. They wanted to put you against the rest of us."
"No, against Katniss Everdeen." Finnick guessed. "Both of them are the current Capitol favorites, different from the rest of us. Sera's a longtime favorite and everyone knows her well or as well as they can. Both underdogs too."
"Katniss wasn't the underdog." Huxley said in defense of Sera. "She had the highest training score in the history of the games."
"Doesn't matter. She's from Twelve." Finnick reminded. District 12 was the one district no one thought much of. "Nobody thought she or Peeta would make it."
"And nobody thought I'd make it out either." Sera said to herself. "They wanted a fight."
"Battle of the Underdogs." Beetee said. "Makes a lot of sense when you all put it that way. If Katniss and Peeta don't make it out, no one would be able to blame them or us if Seraphine was in the arena."
"And Leora ruined it all." Johanna laughed.
Leora bowed in her seat, her blanket falling onto the ground as she did so. "Thank you for the compliments."
"Still, it's a terrible plan." Huxley said. "The star-crossed lovers are far too popular to be purged like the rest of us even with Seraphine, Finnick, Cashmere, and many other favorites in the arena."
"It doesn't mean they won't try." Finnick said. "Have you not seen the aftermath of their victory tour?"
Cecelia nodded. "Eight almost rioted when they were in our district."
"Same with Four."
"And Three." Beetee said. "They had quite the effect on some of the districts."
"Forget the tour." Chaff grumbled out, sitting up straight and slamming his empty glass on the coffee table. "Did none of you see the riots in Eleven last year mid-games?"
Only Sera, Beetee, Zephyr, and Finnick nodded. The rest apart from Seeder had no idea what Chaff was talking about.
Mags made a sound and echoed the word 'riot' before asking a question in a soft voice. "Is…everyone okay in Eleven?"
"As okay as we could be with Peacekeepers attacking people in the streets and heavy curfews." Seeder replied with a heavy heart.
Chaff's eyes were moist when Seeder went into detail about the riots. Sera had to look away from her. She'd never thought the Peacekeepers would go that far to flay people and parade them around. Apparently according to Seeder, in Eleven, they had no problem being cruel and sadistic.
"My point being is that those two…are something like a bomb…a ticking time bomb or whatever but they are dangerous." Seeder stated and Chaff nodded along. "Their little love story gave the districts something to the districts that they never had."
"Hope." Zephyr said, shutting the window of his pocket watch. "They gave Panem hope and that's dangerous."
"Very dangerous." Johanna joked. "I don't get it."
Beetee sighed and shared a secretive look with Sera. No. She was so wrapped up in figuring out what the Capitol was trying to do that she missed how she, Zephyr and Beetee had accidentally or deliberate on Beetee and Zephyr's part, were pulling the others in the room into the rebellion. She didn't want to carry on, not without knowing if Plutarch had burned them.
Even when Sera subtly shook her head, signaling him to call it all off, Beetee didn't look away. He wanted to carry on no matter what. He was desperate for the rebellion to work no matter what. He didn't care if Plutarch had burned them, he just wanted to set Panem on fire.
Sera sighed. "What he means is that those two went against the Capitol—"
"Tell us something new." Johanna cut her off. "We don't need the Capitol's parrot to repeat everything twice."
Capitol's parrot?
Her eye twitched and she sucked in a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. Eugene's voice in her mind, egging her on and telling her to fire back.
Capitol's parrot?!
Sensing the tension, Finnick squeezed her hand in comfort. For Sera, it was like he was trying to stop her from verbally going after Johanna and losing her cool.
"What Sera's trying to say is that those two are potential faces of a…potential rebellion." Zephyr said, his voice became a whisper when it got to the end but everyone
"A rebellion?" Almost everyone in the room echoed, even Mags softly repeating that word and shaking her head in concern.
"That's insane." Leora's voice was the loudest and Wells had frozen. "There's no way people would go through that."
"But they are willing to." Beetee said softly. "3, 4, 8, and 11 are enough proof that there's something."
The room fell silent. Yet for once in years, Sera could see hope and signs of joy in the faces of the formerly despondent victors. Beetee and Zephyr had so far done a great job at riling the other victors with some help from Finnick. She had to admit it.
All she had to do was carry on what they started. "If they make it out again, things could change…maybe for the better."
"A rebellion." Chaff repeated with a wide childlike gaze and a burst of quiet laughter. "Is…that even possible?"
"Could be." Beetee replied. "With the way…things have been going around in Panem, it sounds like there could be an uprising."
"Then we need to make sure they get out." Leora sat up, full of life like she'd finally found her purpose. A wave of murmurs of agreement followed after her words as Finnick and Sera shared a look and he tightened his arms around her with unease.
Johanna seemed like the only skeptic in the room. With her eyes narrowed on Sera, she didn't seem to hide that she didn't trust her at all. "Sounds great if we can even trust her." She motioned to Sera. "And I know you trust her, Finn but it doesn't erase that she's Snow's favorite."
"I'm not." Sera was sick and tired of saying that.
"Yeah, sure, you're not. That's why you're always on his right."
"Think what you'd like." She replied. "But I'm not your enemy. I just…I lost my aunt." She didn't want to talk about Aunt Dahlia or use her memories like this. She had no choice. "A couple of years ago, my family was in the Capitol—they were allowed to be here and on the way back, they had an accident."
"I heard about that." Cecelia clutched her heart and Sera nodded.
"Before…the accident, I said 'no' to someone I shouldn't have and…I lost my aunt because of it. If that wasn't enough, I…I…"
She struggled to breathe. Her heart was constricting around itself, shriveling up in her chest while her mind was running in circles. Her vision was blurring and she could faintly hear Scarus' voice in the background, telling her to relax.
"That's enough." Finnick pulled her away and sat her down on an empty seat by Huxley and Cecelia. He had her hands in his, rubbing circles on top of her nail-imprinted palms. "You don't have to talk."
Johanna clamped her mouth shut and turned away, guilt clouding her face. She opened her mouth and closed it, apology being swallowed up by her pride.
It took almost an hour for the tension to dissipate in the room before Beetee had sprung back into action. Sera had stared at Finnick's face, focusing only on him while trying to steady her breathing. Huxley pushed a cup of tea across the table and silently motioned her to drink.
The cold tea had been dumped into an empty bowl on the cart and replaced by warm chamomile tea. Finnick placed the cup in her hand and waited for her to slowly come back to life as she looked at Beetee go on and on about the rebellion. He could only give them facts with little emotional words to pull them in. He wasn't good with emotions, Zephyr could only help so much.
"It's not a bad idea." Sera said slowly, taking a small sip of her drink and letting the warmth thaw out her cold insides. "A rebellion. It's not the worst idea I've heard."
"Not the best either." Cecelia replied. "A lot of people could die."
"People are dying right now across Panem." Sera reminded her. "If not the Hunger Games then it's famine or poverty. People in the Capitol aren't any better either. Katniss and Peeta gave people hope that the other districts can still be kind to each other."
"And you didn't."
"It's not the same." Because she explained her kindness away and most of it wasn't even real. No one would know she'd poisoned her allies. "I wasn't Katniss. I couldn't and didn't nurse my ally back to health from a mortal wound. Katniss risked her life to save Peeta's. I didn't do any of that."
"She gave Rue a proper send-off." Seeder said and Chaff nodded sadly. "We've never seen that before. No, we haven't. Not a bad idea for those two to get out. A rebellion is long overdue."
"Well, I guess we can think about an informal alliance." Beetee offered.
"I don't know. I was planning to not even try." Leora had no plans or strategies for the arena. "An alliance sounds like a lot of work."
"And why does it have to be Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark?" Johanna said, anger evident in her voice. "They're the reason we're all in this mess in the first place."
"And they could end this mess." Zephyr retorted and Johanna glared at him. "Don't make that face, Joey." And Johanna swung at him, missing by a hair. "It's a sound idea, get them out and let the fire rage on. Best of all, you all make your deaths count and screw over the Capitol."
"Sounds good to me." Chaff and Wells said at the same time. "I just want to see those bastards' faces when they see they screwed up."
"Haymitch." Mags said and everyone turned to her.
Finnick nodded. "What about Haymitch? He might not be too pleased with us using Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark."
"He'll come around." Sera said, covering her mouth with her teacup. "I know he will." She finished her tea and put the cup aside.
"How?" Johanna asked and Sera smiled in response.
She just knew that Haymitch would come and find her. He would need her. Finnick knew it too, remembering how a few words from her had helped Haymitch with the sponsors. Haymitch would find Sera and most of the victors were on board with the rebellion.
She saw Wiress let out a sigh of relief and share a secretive look with Beetee. Thirteen was still a secret to the rest of them. Even Finnick didn't know about it. That was the second hurdle, getting Thirteen to the Capitol. Only the first hurdle had been crossed yet there was still so much left to do.