I Take Cream with my Coffee Please!

A Pokemon Mystery Dungeon Story

Author's Note:

Eyo! This is just a quickie! A fun little idea I came up with while brainstorming ideas for Starlit. This is a concept I considered for the main fic's world building, but I couldn't quite fit it into the plot. The locations involved will appear in Starlit at some point, but this short story is meant to be self contained and silly!

Anyway, concept time! What if PMD took place in a coffee shop? Or at least, revolved around one? That's what you'll be getting out of this story! And don't worry, this has all of the traditional bits and goodies! How will a human work in this setting? You'll just have to find out! And of course, let me know what you think! Anything off? Typos, bad grammar? Don't be afraid to speak up! Any and all reviews are appreciated!

- EMG

There was nothing better than the smell of coffee in the morning! Fruity, herbal scents and caramelized aromas intermixed with smoky, bitter fragrances. Their richness elicited an audible purr from my moisture-deprived throat as warm summer light filtered through my bedside window, followed by the muffled chatter of customers that set my heart aflutter. Another packed day!

I slid from my alteria-plume bed and padded over to my window for a drink. A few pumps of a nearby lever sent clear water rushing into a dish beneath the window, and as I lapped at the fresh, chilling liquid, I parted the curtains to stare out at the bustling market path below. The pokemon of Evergreen were as lively as ever, not that I wanted for more visitors. Our humble shop was busy enough without the steady influx of tourists driving up traffic, but the rapidly evolving nature of the capital didn't leave much room for complaints. Every day was different, and I couldn't have been happier.

"Oi! You dead in there, or are you planning on helping?" Two loud booms echoed out from my thin, rosewood door. The resulting tremors threatened the safety of the occa berry plant shelves and their ceramic pot homes. My heart ached for the little guys, even as their assailant rattled at the door once more. "I know it's your day off, but we're backed up. Get your grassy bum down stairs!" They groaned. "We need help fixing the blender." Muffled, gloopy steps pattered back down the staircase soon after. My plants had been spared!

"Thank you too!" I spat and padded across the room to fetch my brush. Glimmering gold, feline eyes stared back at me through my full-sized mirror, along with the wire brush in question as I set about fixing up my black-brown tabby tufts. I'd been told the pattern was rare, but it didn't make grooming any less painful. Ripping out a knot might as well have been pulling teeth with how sharp the pain was, and my pelt was particularly thick and curly. The extra weight caused my tail to sweep against the ground as I walked, a matter most inconvenient when tight, crowded spaces were your everyday norm. "Perfect!" As a final measure, I plucked a pair of flashy, pink and yellow sweat bands from the counter top, slipped on my favorite headband and made a break for the dining room below.

Café Evergreen

Sure enough, the shop was swamped. A frenzy of mon of various sizes scurried about the polished, ebony flooring of the modest coffee shop, stretching the poor place to its limits as chatter turned to roaring in my ears. "Took ya long enough." A goodra met me halfway down the stairs, glaring down at me with sunken, cherry-pink eyes. Her whole body was pink, and she had the complexion of a cherry blossom, though her attitude left much to be desired as she crossed her sappy arms. Her plump belly tossed with the action, creaking the floorboards below and catching stray glances from nearby customers. "Hurry along, will you? I can't keep up with the hoard with a broken setup."

"Alright, alright." I groaned. "Cool it, Taffy. And move your gut. These stairs are narrow." I poked the goodra's belly playfully, watching carefully as it bounced back. Once all was clear, I slipped by and sauntered into the kitchen, whirling around coworkers with the blender in my sight. "Faulty crystal." I mumbled, a dull piece of quartz clenched between my jaw as I examined the back of the device in question. Jeers from the growing crowd threatened to drown out my senses as I flashed the mineral before the dragon type, yet we were an experienced lot. That pounding in your chest that you got with every breakfast rush. That was what kept us up on the daily. Explorers had their discoveries and treasures, but we merchants? Nothing got the adrenaline running like a pack of wild mon deprived of their daily normalcy! "Fetch it gurl!"

Taffy rolled her eyes and searched the nearby supply cabinets. The poor girl had to bend down just to reach the quadruped-sized drawers, yet it was hardly a chore for the dragon type as she plucked a glowing crystal from a mahogany cupboard and tossed it my way. "Last one!" She sighed. "Do us a favor and pick up a few while you're out, yeah? Leah says she's up for it, but she keeps forgetting the important bits. Damn gerbil." She shook her head, then smiled. "Fetch me a few sweets and I may cover your weekend shift."

"She's a hedgehog." I leapt up and slammed them crystal into the blender. It whirred to life wildly the moment its source of power returned. Frozen, vanilla laté with a sitrus berry twist! "Hmm… Sour." I sniffed lightly at the whirling brew. "And a hint of chocolate. Strange concoction." I shrugged. It seemed someone was in the middle of processing an order when the thing broke down…not that there were any labels. Oops! "Regardless, you'd better not be joking!" I begged the pink-ish dragon. Taffy wasn't one to tell lies, though she did have a habit of forgetting the shifts she'd taken over in the past. "I'm holding you to that. Don't forget I pay you."

Taffy squeezed past to man the blender. She had to hug her tail close just to fit behind the counter, a matter that didn't go unnoticed, judging by the snickers from the occupied chairs. The females at least. The males were otherwise occupied. "Depends on what you grab." She snickered. "Now go, before you're blocked off." She slammed her tail down upon the counter, and the snickers stopped. So too did the eyes as I passed. I didn't blame them. Taffy had been known to pummel those with wandering eyes, and I didn't stop her. What was a sprigatito going to do to a dragon type?

"Good luck holding down the fort!" I called back as I pushed through the crowd and out into the busy market streets. Rusty, sun-bleached brick greeted my pads as I broke through the entrance. It was warm and smooth, despite the constant patter of paws, claws and hooves big and small. Tall, multi-story buildings rose up from the brick streets around my tiny form, some made of stone or brick, others made from more modern materials like steel and glass as pedestrians passed without a care. I pulled out and joined the flow heading out into the plaza. Casual chatter intermixed with the playful screams of kits as I padded along the populated streets, passing building after building until brick turned to stone, and the narrow corridor of the market path spilled into a fancy, less populated plaza.

"Finally." I bent forward into a stretch and sighed. A cool morning breeze spread throughout the plaza, trickling water coloring the monotony of voices in my ears as I adjusted my sweatbands and took in the sights. A massive set of spired fences stretched out at the far end, complete with a gate manned by a duo of meowstic, male and female. Each fence had been fitted with narrow sets of horizontal and vertical bars, designed for keeping out small and large pokemon alike. Behind the gate spanned a spacious courtyard littered with gardens and exotic plants, accompanied by a moat and decorative bridge. Naturally, a massive castle soon followed, and it was beautiful. The crown jewel of Evergreen. Castle Veralos! Landing a location so close to its storied halls was nothing short of a miracle, though I'd never set paw inside.

"That's a familiar face!" A dry, elderly voice called out from across the plaza. Up ahead, a cane-sporting floatzel stood from his perch atop the city's central fountain, marked by its signature birch tree statue. He hobbled forth, a giddy smile spread across his elderly muzzle, even as I rushed him for a hug. "If it isn't young Mocha! Taking a break today?"

"Uncle Riptide!" I nudged the water type with a giggle. The elder wasn't quite an uncle, but he and his family were good family friends. The guy babysat my brother, Axel and I when we were kits, and he'd been no stranger since. "Not quite. Got the day off." I grinned. "And with any luck, I should have the next two as well!" I puffed out my chest proudly. "Please tell me you know a good sweets shop."

The caned weezel rubbed his chin and shrugged. "Sweets aren't my speed, young lass." He chuckled. "Though Val's quite a fan. Stop by the fountain later. I'll hook you up." He cast a loving smirk. "That troublesome goodra put you up to some errands?"

"Taffy's not troublesome!" I snickered, knowing fully well that wasn't true. My down-folded, coffee-furred excuses for ears betrayed my words, and Riptide knew it. The floatzel rubbed the back of his head sheepishly, and I knew the guy was thinking something sneaky. "She's just a friend. Come on, now." I rolled my eyes. "Still, she's holding me hostage here. If Aunt Valerie really knows some places, please let me know."

The water type crossed a paw over his chest and bowed. "You've my word, young miss." He ruffled my forehead fur, forcing a lighthearted growl from my beating chest.

"I'll hold you to your word." I lapped at my paw and flattened the unruly tufts, then glanced off into the plains beyond the plaza. "If you're going to pass through the market, would you mind picking up some quartz for me as well?" I flashed the elder some poké. "Gotta work out some if I'm to keep up my rapport with the guild."

"Still aiding trainees, eh?" Riptide tapped his cane against the worn cobblestone and grinned. "Not quite what I'd choose on my days off, but what does a washed up traveler like me know about marketing?" He shook his head and accepted my coin pouch. "Sure thing, dear. Anything for our city's finest." He replied. I felt my chest swell with pride at the compliment, and before I knew it I was padding for the plains.

"Thanks, Uncle Riptide!" I called back over my shoulder. "I'll be back soon!"

Evergreen Meadow

The sweetness of dew-drenched meadow grass tickled at my snout as I trotted through the trader routes outside the city. They were a bit rough, featuring not dust, but overgrown greenery. The soggy blades welled up between my toes, cooling off my pads as I jogged along Evergreen's perimeter. These were outdated pathways, but the added comfort of the morning grass kept my paws from wearing down, and the sweetness of the meadow flowers only served to boos my morale! It was a nice bonus given I couldn't stand the taste of coffee. The smell was brilliant, but the taste? There was always something off about it, and I never liked the jittery feeling it gave me. Had I brought my feelings up to my customers, I'd surely lose business, and so I found myself pouring the caramel liquid into plants during investor meetings. The poor things needed to be replaced after each incident, but it was a necessary sacrifice!

Halfway along the trail, I made a sharp right into a particularly fluffy patch of meadow grass. My paws were comfy, but my lungs cried out for rest, and the rear fen e of the castle made for the perfect resting point for my morning jog. "Hngh!" I leaned forward into a stretch, then collapsed into a fluffy patch of clover. The damp greenery nipped at my tabby tufts, and while I'd need to brush them out again, the chilling dew was more than worth it as I closed my eyes beneath warm, summer sun rays. Sunbathing had become an unexpected hobby of mine in recent years.

The only stipulation in my occasional assistance of newfound explorers was that I wasn't permitted to lead. This, of course, led to many dry spells in dungeons or otherwise where the less experienced youngsters had no choice but to pause and stare at a crinkled old map. Occasionally you'd get the small types. The pichu's, eevees and joktiks of the world, whom could hardly hold a map, let alone unfold one. In times such as those, I'd been awoken by thundershocks and swifts aplenty, quite to the dismay of the local guildmaster.

"Nngh." A groan disrupted the peace, shaking me from my sun-bleached state of mind and sending me into a tumble. My fur stood on end as I scanned the surrounding meadow. In all the time I'd spent jogging the area, at least since I'd opened the shop, no one had accompanied me on this trail. Taffy occasionally joined me on walks; however, with her bulk, she demanded we stick to the dustier, updated trails. They were more level, and more importantly they didn't waste her energy.

"Who's there?" I stood with my rear facing my shady tree. The voice had come from the thicker grass beyond the path, and I dared not stray into its folds. "Hello?" I called out once more. Yet another groan echoed out from the taller grass soon after, no closer, but seemingly pained. Someone was hurt! "Uhh…hold on!" I tapped my paws against the soggy clover patch and swiveled my head left and right. No one occupied the gardens of the castle's rear courtyard, and, of course, not a soul trotted the remainder of the abandoned trader path. "Great. More work." I stamped my paw into the dampened grass and proceeded.

Whoever had made the sounds from earlier had all but quieted, but they weren't too far in. A downed patch of grass parted the folds ahead, giving way to a caramel-brown vulpix. Their main pelt color was accompanied by a light cream swirl that spiraled about their body, beginning with each of their tails and ending at the tip of their muzzle. Cream-colored freckles dotted their cheeks and flank, and on their side, painted in a large patch where the swirls met was a peculiar heart shape. It was like the art one might make in a laté. Perhaps the local stylist was missing a customer?

"Hey!" I positioned a paw against the fire-type's shoulder and shook it gently, then vigorously. No response. "Come on, wake up!" I sighed, heart pounding in my chest. I was a merchant, not a medic! "Wait!" I checked their forehead, only to recoil in shock. It was scalding hot! "They're overheating!" I swiveled about anxiously. Finding no help in sight, I gritted my teeth and took the fire type upon my shoulders. While the vulpix' underbelly was far from scalding, it was more than enough to get me sweating. It was like carrying a heated blanket in broad daylight! That coupled with the beating summer sun was a recipe for disaster!

"Guild, now!" I huffed and swiveled toward the merchant path, forever thankful for my spongey sportswear. "Sheesh. How much can a vulpix weigh?" I adjusted the fire type's fan-like tails and padded off down the path. At the very least, Riptide would take care of my chores. I just hoped I'd make it back to the square in time to meet Aunt Valerie. Who knew what Taffy would do if I returned to her on a busy shift with nothing. Knowing her, she'd sit on me! "Just my luck!" I groaned. "You'd better be grateful!" I threatened the unconscious vulpix, then jogged off around the city gates. Who knows. Perhaps this was a good thing! The rescue might earn me brownie points with the guildmaster. Assuming, of course, I didn't boil over first.