The Pirate and The Sponge

Bill Cipher is a powerful being of almost pure chaotic energy. Recently, he has tried his best to use his power for the greater good, but sometimes, his desire for mischief can get the better of him.

SpongeBob held a little sandstone pyramid and said, "Bill Cipher! Bill Cipher! Bill Cipher!"

It started glowing, and Bill's crazed laughter echoed across the sea. He popped out of the pyramid-like toast from a toaster.

SpongeBob said, "Hey, Bill! You wanna hang out?"

Bill said, "Sure thing, pal!"

SpongeBob then took Bill to Seashell Park to try and enjoy a picnic. But then, as soon as they sat down, a dark cloud sprayed down rain like a shower. They had to go back to SpongeBob's house.

Bill quipped, "I think I understand why somebody would want to wish away the existence of dark clouds."

SpongeBob chuckled. They enjoyed a picnic indoors. When the rain stopped, SpongeBob took Bill to Patrick's house. His rock opened when SpongeBob knocked.

Patrick said, "Hey, SpongeBob. Oh, uh, and hello to you too, Bill!"

SpongeBob said, holding up his net, "We're going to Jellyfish Feilds, wanna tag-a-long?"

Patrick chirped, "Of course!"

He pulled himself off his rock and landed inside his house. He then pulled out a jellyfish net. He hopped out of the house, and the rock closed abruptly.

SpongeBob asked, "Do you need a net Bill?"

Bill said, "No thanks! I have one of my own."

He summoned a net for himself, and the three of them went to Jellyfish fields.

Captain Frederick paused the Television in the mess hall. The crew had sat down for a lunch meeting.

"Alright, crew," He said, "Today is the day we and the Sandy crew work together to get revenge on behalf of SpongeBob from Burger Beard."

The crew murmured to each other in low grumbles.

He turned to the Pirate next to him and said, "First mate Derrick, set a course for the main island Bikini Atoll!"

Derrick saluted and said, "Aye, aye, Captain!"

Fredrick then said, "Keep the Television off. We need to save our power for the voyage ahead."

They sailed out on the sea. They made their way to the island with three giant palm trees.

The pirates on the crow's nest shouted in unison, "Land ho! Bikini Atoll in sight!"

They turned to each other and chuckled.

Sharon and Frederick brought their ships together, and Sharon boarded Frederick's ship.

Fredrick asked, "So what was the plan?'

Sharon said, "We find him, dug him out of the sand, and start grilling him on where he saw the book last."

Fredrick asked, "Should we go together?"

Sharon chirped, "Yes, Definitely!"

They both went on a lifeboat with their respective first mates. As they left, Frederick's crew played the episode again.

Bill played with SpongeBob and Patrick for a while, and then he got a bit bored. Bill drew a bunch of little doodles of his eye on a bench nearby.

SpongeBob asked, "What are you doing, Bill?"

Bill answered, "Uh, you know, just a bit of street art."

SpongeBob asked, "Isn't that valdelism?"

Bill answered, "Only if you get caught!"

SpongeBob was flummoxed but left it be.

SpongeBob asked, "Why did you paint so many images of your eye on it?"

Bill said, "That is how I see so much. Wherever there is a picture of my eye or an image of myself, I can see through like a spyglass."

SpongeBob said, "Oh, okay."

Bill said, "You wanna go around town and put out more images so I can see even more?"

SpongeBob said, "I don't know, Bill, that could be a mess."

Bill urged, "Aw, come on, it will help me be a better version of myself."

SpongeBob crossed his arms and said, "No, I don't think so. Bikini Bottom doesn't need such a drastic makeover."

Bill sighed, "Fine, just the bench then."

SpongeBob leads Bill away. Then Perch Perkins came to the bench; his headset was bent out of shape, he had a coffee stain on his chest, his hair was a mess, and he was exhausted. He sat on the bench and sighed.

Perch said, "What an awful day! I wish I could start it over and try again."

Perch yawned and lay down to sleep. The eyes that Bill drew glowed as Perch started dreaming. Perch dreamed of a black-and-white version of Jellyfish Fields. Perch spotted the sun, and a narrow slit appeared on it. The sun resembled an eye, and golden bricks surrounded it in a triangle shape. Bill appeared, and the world became dim.

Bill shouted, "I THINK I KNOW A GUY!"

Perch was startled. Bill squinted in glee.

Bill said, "Hey there, Microphone! Good to see you."

Perch said, trying to be civil, "Good to see you too, Bill."

Bill said, "I couldn't help but overhear your woes! Tell me, what weighs down your smile?"

"Well," Perch said with a sigh, "I didn't have a good day today. I kept getting coffee spilled on me, the new sound guy broke my headset, and I have been running around like a madman trying to stay on top of all the news because half the team is out sick."

Bill said, "Aw, poor Perch, I'm sorry that happened to you, pal."

Perch asked, "Is there any way you can make me forget about today?"

Bill said thoughtfully, "Hmmm, tempting, but I think you already had a better idea before I popped in."

Perch thought for a moment and said, "You mean to start the day over and try again?"

Bill replied, "Exactly! I can give you the special power to live today as many times as you like!"

"Hmmm," Perch said, "What's the catch?"

Bill said, "Ah, I see you're a lot smarter than Spatula."

Perch asked, "Is that just your thing? Word association?"

Bill said, "Yep! Now focus; the catch is that if you want to start the day over, you have to sit on this bench."

Perch looked at it, finally noticing the eyes staring at him, and sighed, "Fair enough, I suppose."

Bill made a flame in his hand and extended it to Perch, "It's a deal!"

Perch took Bill's hand to shake it, and a clock appeared under his odd seat. Suddenly, it stopped, and with it, the flow of time.

Bill said, "Hang on, I'm sending you back!"

Perch held onto Bill's arm, and the clock began to wind backward at an incredible speed. Perch heard loud backward ticking. He closed his eyes, and then it warped into the sound of his loud alarm. Perch jumped awake. He calmed his breathing and turned off the alarm.

Perch asked, "Did it work?"

He got out of bed. He turned to the calendar and tore the day from February first to February second.

Perch muttered, "Oh my gosh."

Perch went to the kitchen and checked the dry marker calendar to mark off the first of the month.

Perch said, "Oh my gosh."

Perch flipped on the radio, and he heard the weather bot chirp, "Daily weather report for February second."

Perch didn't hear the rest because he cheered, "Oh my gosh! It worked! Hah, Thank you, Bill! Now I can try to make today go well!"

Perch got ready for his day, and when he went to pour himself a coffee, he was cautious not to spill it on his blazer. Except later, when he came to the News studio, a clumsy intern tripped over a wire, and half a dozen hot and iced coffees stained Perch's blazer.

The intern apologized profusely, giving him a napkin, "Ah, Sorry, Perch! Those wires should really be taped down."

Perch snapped, "Why don't you just watch where you were going?"

He stormed off.

Later, Perch had to put on his headset to get ready for the field reporting. He ran a few tests, and it was on the fritz.

The new sound guy said, "Sorry, I did a little tinkering on your headset. I guess they may not be in working order."

Perch angrily huffed, "If it isn't broken, don't fix it!"

Then, Perch was in the News van with a camera crew. That's when he got the call.

Perch answered, "Perch Perkins Bikini Bottom News reporter."

His bio said, "Heeey Perch!"

Perch knew that by his bBoss'stone that there was a problem.

Perch said, "So listen, you know you're my best reporter, right? That you would do anything to make me happy, right?"

Perch said exhaustedly, "Of course, Boss!"

Perch's Boss said, "Great, because we just lost half your team to the itch spots, and I just know that my best reporter would be able to pick up the slack, Right?"

Perch said sarcastically, "You can count on me, Boss."

Perch's BBosschirped, "Greeeeaaat! Bye-bye now!"

The phone hung up, and Perch grumbled. For the rest of the day, Perch had to stop to report on something happening in Bikini Bottom every hour until sunset.

Perch went for a walk in Jellyfish Fields to try to clear his head. He came to the bench covered in eyes and sat down on it. He sighed exhaustedly.

Perch said angrily, "I don't get it; everything happened the same way. I don't know how, but today was still just as bad, if not worse, than the first time!"

Perch closed his eyes and said, "I think I need to try again."

A clock appeared under his odd seat. Suddenly, it stopped, and with it, the flow of time. The clock then began to wind backward at an incredible speed. Perch heard loud backward ticking. Then, it warped into the sound of his loud alarm. Perch jumped awake. He calmed his breathing and turned off the alarm.

Perch said, "Oh yeah, Bill did say I can try this day as many times as I'd like."

Perch was careful both at home and at work; he managed to get to his dressing room with a coffee-free blazer. Before he put on his headset, however, he went to refill his coffee at the coffee maker in there. As soon as he removed the pot to pour, it randomly exploded lukewarm coffee everywhere—Staining Perch's blazer.

Perch was surprised, but then he double-checked the leftover coffee maker machine and discovered that someone put explosive coffee grounds in the maker. Perch was deeply confused as to how he hadn't noticed that the last two times he had lived that day.

He tried to troubleshoot on his headset, and when it came time to test them, they once again were on the fritz.

Perch asked, "What did you do to this thing?"

The new sound guy replied, "I don't remember; I just wanted to make the wires more organized internally."

Perch was frustrated.

Later, he tried to talk his Boss out of giving him so many reports to record in a day.

Petch begged, "I don't know if I can handle more than three scoops today."

Perch's Boss scoffed, "Of course you can; you're the best we got!"

Then he hung up before Perch could protest any further. For the rest of the day, Perch had to stop to report on something happening in Bikini Bottom every hour until sunset.

Perch once again walked through Jellyfish Feilds and sat on the bench covered in eyes.

Perch muttered, "I think I need to try again."

A clock appeared under his odd seat. Suddenly, it stopped, and with it, the flow of time. The clock then began to wind backward at an incredible speed. Perch heard loud backward ticking. Perch closed his eyes. Then, it warped into the sound of his loud alarm. Perch jumped awake. He calmed his breathing and turned off the alarm.

Bill sang a little song to try to make Perch feel better, "You're living life in the Loop!

You can forever make today go well!

You're living in a loop now!

Today was yesterday, and tomorrow, too!

You're living life in the Loop!"

Perch Perkins went about this day many times, failing to prevent every bad thing that happened to him. He was growing frustrated and exhausted. He kept sitting on the bench, wishing to try again, and waking up in his bed and facing the same challenges that brought him to the bench that started the day all over again. Perch lost track of just how many times this had happened.

Perch was walking back to the bench and then was stopped by an invisible wall.

A voice cooed, "I don't think so."

It didn't sound like Bill's; in fact, this voice was a lot deeper and calmer than Bill's.

Perch asked, looking around, "Who said that?"

A glowing blue heart with tattered butterfly wings appeared before Perch, and this odd being spoke, "I did; I am the Heart of the Ocean."

Perch asked, "Your name is the Heart of the Ocean?"

The being chuckled and said, "No, my true name is Aquarius."

Perch was amazed.

Aquarius asked, "Why are you tormenting yourself like this?"

Perch answered, "I just wanted to make today better! If I could try a little harder, I wouldn't have to suffer!"

Aquarius said calmly, "But you've already tried to do everything. Well, everything except how you approach your bad day."

Perch asked, "What do you mean?"

Aquarius said, "No matter how many times you have lived this day, you still have the same reaction. Anger and frustration."

Perch said, somewhat annoyed, "Well, yeah, I can't keep the bad things from happening!"

Aquarius said, "Exactly! These things are going to keep happening regardless of your actions, but you can still make the day better."

Perch asked, "Really, how?"

Aquarius said, "How do you react to these events? You can be upset in the moment, but why let them drag your overall mood?"

Perch began thinking and said, "I don't know; I guess I never thought about it like that before."

Aquarius said, "I'll talk my brother into letting you out of this terrible loop if you try to have a good day tomorrow by having a better attitude."

Perch sighed, "Okay."

Aquarius let Perch sit on the bench again. A clock appeared under his odd seat. Suddenly, it stopped, and with it, the flow of time. The clock then began to wind backward at an incredible speed. Perch heard loud backward ticking. Perch closed his eyes. Then, it warped into the sound of his loud alarm. Perch jumped awake. He calmed his breathing and turned off the alarm.

He was careful pouring his coffee in the morning. When the intern spilled coffee onto Perch and was super apologetic about it, Perch accepted the apology gracefully. When the new sound guy admitted to breaking the headset, Perch asked for one that wasn't broken. When Perch's Boss tried to unload all the reports onto Perch, the journalist outright refused and suggested reporting on the majority of these scoops for another day.

He went home instead of Jellyfish Feilds. As Perch's eyes closed, he felt his body sitting up, his hand being grabbed, and his holding onto someone's arm. When Perch opened his eyes, he saw he was still holding onto Bill. He noticed he was back on the bench and that it was the middle of the night.

Perch let Bill go and asked, "What just happened?"

Bill chirped, "You did it! You broke the Loop!"

Perch asked, "Am I awake?"

Bill answered, "Yep!"

Perch pinched himself to check and asked, "How long was I in that Loop?"

Bill shrugged and said, "Eh, it doesn't matter if I aged your soul five years while your body was just lying limp in my arms or not. You learned your lesson. That's all that matters! See you later!"

Bill then disappeared. Perch got up and walked away.

THE CREDITS ROLL

Captain Frederick's crew turned off the Television.

They went back up to the deck of their ship as a loud commotion was heard.

Burger Beard was wrapped in ropes over the water; he was dripping wet and was shouting, "They took the book; I don't know where it is now, I swear!"

Captain Sharon snarled in the lifeboat, threatening with a sword, "That's not what I was asking. What was the name of the dolphin that helped SpongeBob?"

Captain Fredrick shouted on the top deck of the ship, "You'd better tell us before you get another drink of salt water!"

Burger Beard whimpered, "It was Bubbles. The dolphin was named Bubbles!"

Captain Sharon cut Burger Beard down and caught him before he was dunked again. Captain Sharon wrote the name down on a scroll, put it in a bottle, and threw it at Captain Fredrick. Fredrick caught the bottle.

Fredrick said, "Thanks, Sharon, I owe you one!"

Sharon said, "Don't worry about it. I got my prize. Captain Bart would be very interested in finding out just what Burger Beard put his favorite little sponge through."

Burger Beard gulped nervously, and the little lifeboat returned to Sharon's ship.