12/3/2023: Sorry that it's taking a long time for rewriting all of this. Just been busy. Again I'm sorry.

Leia's Guide to: Dating

The camera turned on, and it showed Leia wearing workout clothes.

"And that concludes Mabel's Guide to Fitness. With my sister Lynn and Waddles, the Jog Hog."

The camera moved to show both Lynn and Waddles on separate treadmills. Both had food hanging at the end of the treadmills, with Lynn's being a meatball sub, while Waddles had an ice cream sundae.

"I won't stop until I get my reward! Lynn Loud Jr. will never quit!" Lynn confidently said.

Mabel nodded at her sister, and said," Atta boy sis! Keep going!" She then went over to Waddles, and said," You want that sundae? You gotta jog for it, Jog Hog! Look at his little shorts."

Lynn then proceeded to jump to try and get the sandwich, but missed. She ended up falling down, and shot backwards due to how fast the treadmill was going. She screamed and a crash was heard.

"I'm alright." Lynn said off-screen.

Once Mabel's intro ended, it then showed Mabel, along with various stuffed animals sitting at a table.

"As we all know, I'm a dating expert. I learned from the best, thanks to my sisters. So now I can't get the boys to leave me alone!"

The video cut to Mabel outside standing in front of a window. She was holding a cardboard cutout of a boy.

"Mabel, I love you so much, baby. Why won't you let me in to your life?" She said pretending to be the cutout.

The video then went back to Mabel sitting down.

"You know what you did Zack! Today we're gonna test the date-ability of Gravity Fall's swingin-est bachelors and bachelorettes. Soos!"

"Get ready to fall in love America! Am I looking at the right camera?" Soos asked, as he was looking the wrong way.

"Leni!"

Leni smiled and waved," Like hi everyone!"

"Dipper!"

"Who are you making this for?" Dipper asked.

"Lincoln!"

Lincoln looked sorta annoyed and said," She basically blackmailed me. Not going to say what, but here I am."

"Ronnie Anne!"

Ronnie Anne had the same annoyed look as Lincoln, and said," She wouldn't leave me alone."

"Grunkle Stan!"

"I'm only here cause you promised bacon." Leia then threw a strip of bacon, and Stan caught it and ate it. "I'm pacified."

Mabel then got in front of the camera, and said," And now for a simple 9,000 question dating quiz."

Leni gasped off-screen and said," A quiz? Like I didn't study!"

"You'll do fine." Mabel assured her sister.

The camera then changed to the group in the living room, where they were taking the quiz.

"Should men always pay for dinner? What is this, Russia?" Stan asked.

"How many kids would you like to have? Seven, preferably. That's one to love every day of the week. And it would be like having you dudes as my kids." Soos said.

"Aw that's sweet! Let's see… If you were a guy/girl, where would you take your date? That's easy! Like take them shopping to the mall!" Leni said.

"What do you do when you see someone who is amazingly attractive? A) Make conversation and like what they like, no matter what. B) Kiss them. C) Profess your love to them? This sounds like a bad Novella." Ronnie Anne said.

"How do you treat a gal? Huh. Well, hovering nearby and laughing at everything she says obviously. Nailing this." Dipper said as he wrote his answer.

Ronnie Anne leaned over to Lincoln, and said," Yep, the ladies will be lining up to be with him." This caused Lincoln to snicker.

Mabel then went in front of the camera again, and said, "While they're busy working. We give you, 'Animal Dating!'"

The video then went through a montage of Mabel forcing animals to date, with the last one involving Mabel getting attacked by squirrels. After that, it then went to Mabel giving everyone their results.

"And here are your results. Grunkle Stan, on a scale from one to five. You scored a three."

"Yes! Yes!" Stan cheered.

"This will limit your dating pool to widows, lady plumbers and convicts."

Stan didn't seem to mind and said," I still consider this a victory."

"Leni, you scored, a 3 as well!"

Leni clapped excitedly and said," Eeee! This is like, totes awesome!"

"Dipper. Your score is… Eesh! You know, scores don't really matter. You just need to focus on being you."

Mabel then went to Lincoln and Ronnie Anne, and said," Lincoln and Ronnie Anne. You both scored a 4. Lincoln this limits your dating pool to tough, friendly, tomboys who have a good heart. Oh, and also comes from a big family and loves to skateboard."

Lincoln raised a brow, and said," Uh, why is that so specific?"

"Ronnie Anne, your dating pool to guys with a man with a plan attitude. Likes nerdy stuff, including comics and video games. Who also come from a big family. And who also has a good heart."

Ronnie Anne blinked, and said," Okay that's oddly specific as well… wait a minute. Are you trying to set Lincoln and me up?" She said the last part with a small blush.

Lincoln glared at his sister, and said," Seriously? For the last time we don't like each other. How many times do I have to tell you guys?"

Mabel ignored them, and then went to Soos," Soos, on a scale from one to five you scored… a twelve?"

"My grandma was right all along. I am the world's most perfect man." Soos said and then a spotlight shined down on him And three birds fly at him and perch on his shoulders and head.

The camera then went back to Mabel sitting at her table.

"Love is all around us. And if it seems like you two aren't the right fit. Force it!"

"We still need to talk about your meddling, Leia." Lincoln said off-screen.

Leia was about to say something but the two squirrels from earlier came back and then started to attack her again.

" Oh, no! The squirrels! They're back! Aaah!" She then proceeded to picks up a stuffed Rhino and defended herself with it. "Save me, Mr. Rhino! Save me!"

The camera then turned off.