A/N
Hi, new chapter :) just want to clarify that throughout this one, the topic of guns will be addressed, as well as their use with examples, I clarified it because I know it's a sensitive topic that some of the readers may be disturbed by, so it seems appropriate to mention it before you start reading it.
Thank you and enjoy :) please leave a comment, opinion or smiley face at least.
Release the magazine, open the slide, remove the safety, remove the slide, remove the barrel, remove the cartridge, clean and assemble in the reverse order. Release the magazine, open the slide, remove the safety...I feel like we've been learning to assemble and disassemble Glock pistols for hours as Four instructed us. I had never held a gun in my hands before, I never imagined how heavy it was, nor how dangerous it would feel just to hold it even if there were no bullets in it. I must admit that I was relieved when he told us that we would first learn how to handle it and not start directly shooting them; I never imagined that one day I would pull the trigger of one, even if it was just to hit a prop target.
I also admit that after three full days of physical training, my body appreciates the change, although it's true that, as Christina said, my body doesn't feel as sore as the morning after the first day of training. After two hours of intensive exercise, it's nice to concentrate on a task that doesn't involve moving my legs, plus as repulsive as I find the idea of having to shoot a gun, studying its anatomy and machinery feeds my erudite curiosity a bit. Anyway, the distraction is good.
The room is filled with the mutterings of initiates whispering the steps Four taught us and the metallic sounds of parts being taken apart and reassembled. " Get familiar with your weapon, feel the pieces and the weight each part has" Four repeats as he paces around the tables we are working at. As usual he doesn't stop with me, I don't expect him to, all his energy is focused on the true initiates, they are the ones who really have to learn this and he has let me know that with the odd comment here and there. He doesn't want me here, my presence makes him uncomfortable and has him on edge.
Actually the further away he and Eric are from me the better. Eric is threatening, not that I would let him notice but having him supervising my every step makes my nerves on edge; Four is too, but there is something else, something I have yet to identify that makes my body react when he walks by me or looks directly at me, of course, the few times he does. I prefer it that way.
I release the magazine, open the slide, continue with all the steps concentrating only on my hands. In my mind I repeat all the steps that I know I have already learned; I feel him before I see him, Four is behind me, approaching Roy who awkwardly disassembles his gun. I take a deep breath and keep going, my palms now sweating just knowing he's close to me but I don't let that get to me. He approaches Roy to give him some indication and his arm brushes against mine, an electrifying vibration is born from the point where our bodies meet even though I'm wearing a shirt with long sleeves I feel the heat of his skin, my body involuntarily holds its breath, my hands no longer belong to me and when before they held the Glock firmly they now tremble slightly but it's enough to make me drop the gun.
The automatic noise of feeling the metal slide through my fingers must get his attention, he quickly grabs the gun before it falls "Careful" he tells me harshly. My body turns without my permission to face him and receive the gun he offers me, as I take it our fingers touch gently and I feel that tingle of electricity again, I don't know if he feels it too but he withdraws his hand quickly. Our eyes lock on each other and I know I should avert my gaze but I can't, I'm locked in, losing myself in the deep ocean of his eyes. Four frowns, the same face he always wears when he's training us but his eyes don't match the mask he has on. I don't understand how they can say nothing and at the same time seem to shout a message.
He raises an eyebrow and I know I should turn around, get back to my previous position and get on with my task. "Sorry, thank you," I tell him with my eyes fixed on the work table. Four continues to pace near the others and I automatically feel cold in the place he occupied next to me despite today's unbearably hot weather. Dauntless has a wide variety of workout clothes but most of the clothes worn by the women here are too revealing for my taste. I promised myself to endure as much of the jackets and long sleeves as I can despite the heat.
Concentrating on the task again makes the time pass and before I know it Four calls us to start shooting. The shooting room is full of boards and dummies with different sized targets drawn on them. Four stands in front of us with his back to us, his sight is fixed on a wall with different targets, he explains again the safeties and how to reload our guns. "Listen well, you must maintain a firm but at the same time comfortable posture when aiming your weapons. Spread your legs so that they are at shoulder height. Keep your arms up, use the sights of the gun to aim the bullet where you want it" Four gets into position and looks even taller than he already is, the muscles of his back are more pronounced through his black t-shirt, maybe I've never paid so much attention to a man's back before or is it just that in Abnegation everyone is too thin but I can't take my eyes off his marked shoulder blades. Apparently the other girls can't either because I hear Maria's stupid giggle.
"You must be careful and keep your arms steady when you shoot, that way you will avoid the recoil of the gun when it fires breaking your nose". Four tenses up and starts shooting at different targets, one, two, three shots until he reaches 10 and empties the cartridge. The whole room is in complete silence as I see the ten different targets with a hole in the center of each one. My mouth opens wide, I have never felt admiration for someone I don't know but to see Four so sure of himself, showing us with serenity his ability, that if I suspected it before now I confirm it, his superior ability, has me completely amazed.
I can't see his whole face but I can see in him a look full of pride. I have no way to compare it but I am sure that it is not common that a person manages to have such precision and remain as serene as he is. After the first impression, the feeling is general nervous looks in all the initiates when we realize that we have to reach that standard. Four turns to look at the initiates and for a first moment our eyes lock again, although his mouth doesn't smile his eyes do and I can't help but get lost in them, but again the moment passes too quickly and Four tells us it's our time to shoot.
I stand on the floor mark, I try to make my body mimic the position in which Four stood for the demonstration, even though I spent the last few hours holding the gun, it now feels heavier than ever. I try to push past the feeling of rejection my body has at the loaded Glock. Four gives the cue to start firing. The room fills with gunshots, smoke and the smell between metal and gunpowder. I have to take a couple of deep breaths before I start shooting. I keep my arms stretched out in front of me and try to aim at the center of the target. I release the air from my lungs and fire. The force of the shot causes my arms to snap back towards my face even though I was aware that it would happen it takes me by surprise. The butt of the gun hits me in the mouth and I taste blood.
"Are you okay?" Four's deep voice takes me by surprise and I can't help but snap my head towards him. For a second his face shows concern and his gaze is fixed on my lips. I didn't even know he was this close to me, a quick movement of his hand distracts me from his eyes. I feel very nervous about both the gun and his closeness, I must be imagining things because I seemed to think his hand was coming up towards my mouth. The sound of gunfire and cartridge change reminds me of the task at hand. I nod and turn to try to shoot again. I feel his gaze burning the back of my neck, I brace myself again and fire, this time remembering to tense my arms so as not to hit myself.
The rest of the training passes smoothly but without any particular glory, not a single one of my bullets has been even close to the center of the target but I can't help but feel good to see that my companions next to me haven't hit even the biggest circles. We switch between Glocks and Heckler & Koch which are longer guns and as the hours pass I feel more in control. There is a mixture of smugness and fear that comes over me as I practice with them. At the end of the first part of the day, I notice for the first time how tired my arms feel, maybe we didn't do that much physical conditioning today but carrying guns and straining my body exhausts me enough that I force myself to grab a sandwich and take it back to the dorms to rest before I have to return to the shooting room in the afternoon.
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From the moment I stepped back into the shooting room and saw that Eric was with Four, my whole body went on alert. I don't exactly feel comfortable being in the same room as him with hundreds of loaded guns. Four takes us to a part of the room we weren't in in the morning; he stops us in front of a several meter wall that appears to have a giant, black screen. "Okay, listen up everyone. Today we learned to shoot at static targets which is useful to perfect our shooting but in a real situation we can't expect enemies to stand around waiting for our bullets. Normally in case we have to use our weapons, the situation will not be favorable, learning to shoot on the move will be necessary in order to survive" As he says this a human silhouette appears on the screen and several points where he hides only to then run to another point.
"Thanks to Erudites technological advances, our task has been made easier with this" Four says and I notice the venom he spits when he mentions said faction and shows what appears to be half of a square lens. "This targeting scope helps us to more accurately locate our target. Of course, as part of your training, you will have to learn to do it the old-fashioned way, without extra help. We can't trust our lives to a device, and you never know when we'll have to act without its help."
"Now pay attention, Eric will demonstrate how the training projection works" Four holds a smirk as Eric positions himself at the top of the screen "On the first level you will do it only with the projection in motion, then you will use this vest" he shows a black vest with small spotlights all over it "the projection will simulate attackers with guns, you will have to take them down and try not to get shot; If you're not fast enough and a bullet hits you, the vest will light up where the bullet strikes" he presses a button on the computer on the table and red bulbs light up on the part of the vest that covers the heart.
"The idea is for you to master the art of aiming, firing and shielding on the move, shall we begin?" he asks Eric and he scoffs signaling that he is ready. "The weapons we use for this exercise have the same weight and recoil as the ones you used in the morning with the difference that they don't have real bullets, just electronic darts that won't damage the projection but are accurate enough to evaluate your performance."
A red circle appears in the center of the screen indicating a countdown, when it reaches zero a silhouette runs across the screen as Eric begins to scroll as well. He starts shooting at the different silhouettes that keep coming out from all sides, and although I can see that he hits every shot, the marks left by the gun are on different parts of the silhouettes' anatomy, several of them on the legs or arms, some on the torso. The whole exercise lasts no more than five minutes, and when it is over, a box appears in the center of the screen showing Eric's score. This shows that Eric shot 18 targets but only fatally wounded two, the rest are arranged in minor wounds.
"Not bad, you killed two" Four sneers at Eric and inside I'm thankful that the gun in his hand only works in the projection because the look he gives him carries a sure sentence "You think you can do better instructor?" Spits Eric "Oh, I know I can do better" replies Four smugly. Eric tosses him the gun and he catches it with no problem "Let's watch it" he mumbles to him. Four stands at the top of the screen and the red circle with the countdown appears.
Again I'm speechless, the projection starts and Four effortlessly begins to shoot the silhouettes, one after another they light up in the heads and it seems that they will never stop coming out; I allow myself to divert my attention for a few seconds to look at Eric's face, his arms are crossed over his chest and his knuckles are white from clenching his hands. I hear the noise that signals the end of the projection and the scoreboard appears. I can't believe it but at the same time I'm not surprised, Four successfully neutralized 32 targets and only two with serious injuries, not a single minor wound. Eric's face is red and his brow is so furrowed that it is difficult to identify where his eyes start and his eyebrows end.
Some initiates whistle in admiration, Eric then calls everyone's attention "Everyone pay attention on this side" pointing to a rectangular screen that I had not noticed before, when everyone turns to see it, the names of all the initiates including mine appear on it, what is this? "This is the leaderboard by stage, all your performance in the training will be computerized and will be counted for the ranking evaluation" Eric again has a smirk on his face as he sees the faces of confusion and nerves of all the initiates.
"All the points will be added up until the end of the first stage of training, but you should know that every mistake will deduct from what you have accumulated. By the end of the stage the last five in the ranking will be cut from the initiation and become factionless, so I recommend you to meditate well if Dauntless is really what you want, and if so then strive to get the highest score" Eric casts a menacing look at all of us and stops on me, a grimace disfigures his face as he speaks again "Yes Miss Prior, this goes for you too, if you want to continue with us make sure you don't come in last places" I swallow with difficulty and notice that some initiates look at me quizzically at the comment, my work here has not yet reached everyone's ears.
Four then tells us the order in which we will go to the projection, while it is not our turn we have to continue practicing with the real weapons on the other side of the room. I have emptied almost six cartridges practicing when Four calls me for the projection. I take the gun and notice he's right, it weighs the same but knowing it doesn't contain real bullets takes away the weight of danger I feel when I fire the other guns. "Ready?" He asks and I nod, Four directs me to the start mark placing his hand on my lower back, I put all my concentration into ignoring the electrifying tingle I feel with the sensation of his hand and remind myself to breathe. The countdown begins and the first silhouette runs. This time I am much more aware of the recoil of the gun and somehow I have become familiar with the sight, I fire again and again without taking much notice of where my bullets land. I try to locate all the targets with my peripheral sight and I quickly realize that this way it is easier to advance, before one silhouette falls completely to the ground my sights are already on another one.
The simulation ends and my score appears; for my first time I didn't do badly. I didn't mortally wound any silhouette but out of my 13, I only had one minor wound, the rest are severe. Four takes the gun from me and nods approvingly, this makes my stomach turn and it's a feeling I don't understand, I decide not to pay too much attention to this, if what Eric said is true, I have to concentrate on succeeding in the initiation, if I get out in the first stage nothing I've worked for will have been worth it.
The rest of the training is spent shooting at static targets until Eric dismisses us all. Layla and I head to the dining room happy with our little progress for the day.
Tobias POV
"Well, all mighty Four, you don't mind cleaning all this up by yourself do you? I have a lot of things to do" Eric says teasingly as he walks towards the exit, of course I didn't expect him to deign to help me clean up, no, that's way beneath him. "By the way, I expect the report and score from today's training first thing tomorrow" he tells me before walking out the door.
Fucker, of course he can't wait until the weekend for that, not that he's really going to review them he just wants to make it clear once again who's in charge. I start to collect all the weapons and put them away in the storage room so I can hand the key to Fibs the manager. I feel in my shoulders the accumulated tension of these three days although so far it hasn't been much different from the initiations of other years, some initiates here and there who still don't understand that they should respect me, some of the girls trying to flirt with me, thinking they will get my attention in the most stupid ways and Eric breathing down my neck. In truth things start to get complicated when the one-on-one fights start and then my life goes to shit when we move to the second stage with the fear simulations.
There's no reason to feel so irritated so soon, except that there is: a little blonde who shouldn't be here to begin with. I'm not normally interested in initiates outside of the times I have to train them, but there's something about her that intrigues me. She's small, but everything Uriah said about her is true. She is not quiet, shy or submissive as her faction demands; she is stubborn, she does not give up even though I know the training is too much for what she is used to doing, shit, I remember how I felt at my initiation the first week, I was sure my body would not hold up and I feel lucky that my training was not as heavy with what it is now; instead she does not stop, exhaustion is not powerful enough to stop her.
I'm having a hard time trying not to look at her constantly. I have to remind myself all the time that I have other initiates who are actually trying to get into this faction. I have tried these days to concentrate on the others, help them improve their techniques, correct their faults, but one way or another I always find myself looking at her. I don't know why, I don't usually look at others too much if not to analyze whether or not they represent a danger, much less fix my attention on any girl and I'm sure as hell not wanting to start doing it with Uriah's girl, although in reality in the four days that have passed since she arrived, I haven't seen them together outside of the occasions when they coincide in the dining room.
I start sweeping the hundreds of shells off the floor, and my stomach cringes as I remember how Tris hurt herself shooting for the first time, I know that just holding a gun, let alone firing it, was a big change for her. What is it about this girl that has me analyzing every step she takes?. As soon as the initiates formed up to start shooting my body automatically moved to where she was, an unknown curiosity pushed me to want to witness her first shot, when I saw the recoil straight towards her face I had to gather all my strength not to take the gun out of her hands, not because I thought she can't do it, but because she shouldn't; guns are loaded with danger, carrying one opens the door to take risks, risk that somewhere in the back of my mind I don't want her to take.
God, I think I stopped breathing when I was about to wipe the blood from her lip with my fingers. Thankfully the memory of the goose bumps I felt when my arm touched hers in the morning came to me in time before my hand traveled alone to her lips. Maybe the tension of not knowing what's going on in the faction and the whole kicked out problem has me on edge and more unstable than ever. Whatever it is I have to remember to stay away from her, not only because she's here to do a job I don't approve of, but because she's still someone who works for Marcus, plus the obvious, Uriah is interested in her, I need to distract myself….
And as if the universe reads my thoughts, Zeke walks in the door just as I finish sweeping. "It's all work and no play with you bro" he smiles but the smile doesn't reach his eyes, not even his carefree attitude can disguise the utter dismay that burdens his gaze. "What's wrong?" I ask him fearing whatever the answer might be.
"Can't one look to have fun time with their best friend by any chance?" Zeke places his hands on his chest as if pained by my question but throws a quick glance at the cameras on the ceiling, he wants to tell me something but being under surveillance it's not possible. "Dinner? " He asks me but I know he actually wants us to get out of here, I could have dinner because I'm starving but the initiates have adopted the tables next to ours and I really don't want to see her, in fact, at this moment I promise myself that I won't get distracted again, I will not let all my focus be on her even though doing so today rewarded me with the depth of her eyes inviting me to drown in them, especially after firing 10 perfect shots, I swear on my life I didn't want to stare at her but my ego could outdo me, seeing her look of admiration warmed something in my chest that I didn't know was cold before today.
"How about some beer instead?" I propose knowing it will give us an excuse to go to the comfort of her apartment. We walk across the pit heading to Zeke's and I swear every fiber in my body pulls the other way, towards the diner where it knows she'll be, fuck it, I don't recognize the person I've been these past four days, I don't want to recognize it or know it.
Zeke uncaps two beers and hands me one, no need for unnecessary small talk "It happened again" he says and I feel my face lose all color "When and how many?" I reply.
"Before the second part of the day's training started and two people this time" shit, Eric didn't show up in the shooting room until after lunch. "Do you think they are..." Zeke doesn't have to specify what he's referring to, by now it's no secret that the search for divergents in this faction is more of a witch hunt than anything else.
"It doesn't make sense, the last time they did it I looked closely at the records and none of them were" I reply apprehensively. At first, when Zeke and I working in the control room noticed that Max and Eric would take people into the simulation rooms apply a serum to them and after what looked like an interrogation they would expel them from the faction without giving them a chance to say goodbye to anyone, it didn't take us long to come to that conclusion; Erudite and the leaders of Dauntless are so concerned with finding and eliminating all divergents that it was the only reason we could find to justify bringing adult and senior members back to the simulation rooms, but after a long and complicated investigation we discovered that most of those kicked out didn't have an ounce of divergence in their bodies.
"And among the initiates are there any?" he asks earnestly, that's what I love about my best friend and the reason I know I can trust him with my life: he genuinely cares about everyone. "It's too early to say, so far I don't know" but I lie, from the first moment I heard her speak I sensed it, there is no way there exists an abnegation rebel if it's not because she doesn't fit the standards. Too abnegated for Dauntless, but too Bold for Abnegation, for fuck's sake, is it wrong to wish that she doesn't make it to stage two because I don't want to deal with it if my suspicions are right? If her rankings are low she'll have to go and be safe in her faction, even if it means missing out on the stolen glimpses I've been indulging in these days.
"Do you think you can you know... investigate out there?" Zeke asks carefully, probably anticipating my answer. Shit, sometimes I regret telling him certain things.
"Nah, Evelyn didn't know anything the last time I talked to her, I highly doubt she's had any improvement."
"Man, I can't just sit tight and do nothing about it, what if the next person they take to the simulations is Shauna or my mom or Uriah, what will happen then Four?" his eyes are full of fear as he imagines his family in danger, I share the sentiment. I may not have had a family growing up, but fuck these people adopted me as soon as I got here, they are my family too and I will do everything in my power to protect them.
"Maybe it's time to talk to a certain ambassador and find out exactly what she knows" Zeke suggests and my stomach cringes for I don't know how many times today. Maybe it's my ego bruised by Zeke's lack of confidence that I can figure this out, but I can't help but think that I haven't come this far just to lean on someone I don't really know in order to save my family and on the other hand, involving her would be putting her at the same risk we're all in, even though in reality from the kind of looks Eric is giving her, I sense that train left a long time ago.
This thought doesn't reassure me, and I have to remind myself to relax my fists, as I watch my knuckles regain color my mind navigates back to the fierce little blonde I can't get out of my mind.
A/N
I'm going to ask as many times as it takes, leave comments, reviews, smiley faces or at least your favorite color but write something to let me know if you like this and it's worth it, please.