A/N: No wars, no plots, no reality ending threats. Just a series of random one shots of a man married to his cat.

discord .gg/JV97AUmAr7

The sun was shining, the weather was perfect, the birds were chirping and the children were laughing in the streets. And all of it pissed Yoruichi off.

With an annoyed huff, she blew her bangs out of her eyes and threw her arms over head in a streatch. She hated mornings. Scratch that. She hated waking up. Everything from opening her eyes to moving her limp limbs. Was it so wrong she just wanted to sleep more? And yet, the smell of breakfast wafting through the air was an unceremonious kick to her empty stomach.

She lifted her delicate chin and sniffed the air. Grilled fish and eggs. Damn that man.

With much effort, Yoruichi groggily threw her legs over the bed and made quite the effort to stand up. She blinked twice and took a step away from the bed, but not before her eyes caught her reflection in the dresser mirror. Her long dark hair, shimmering in violet hues as it caught strands of sunlight from the window, framed her nude form. While it was nobody's business but hers if she walked naked in her own house - she had convinced her husband to buy a house with spacious windows because, ironically, she preferred natural lighting - there was no need to give the neighbors a show.

With practiced ease, Yoruichi slid one of the dresser drawers open and immediately picked out a far too large black T-shirt and threw it over her head and slid it around her till the hem of the shirt was touching her knees. She gingerly pulled her hair out from under the shirt as she walked out the bedroom, through the hall and down the stairs.

Yoruichi finally came to a stop at the threshold of the living room and took in the sight of her husband sitting on one end of the long couch. T.V remote in one hand and a cup of steaming coffee in the other, his orange hair cut neat but rougishly stylish. His gaze drifted from the news reporter onc screen over to her. And, sleep addled as she was, Yoruichi didn't miss the way his brown eyes ran over her, taking in her form in full.

The corners of her lips twitched even as he brought the mug of coffee to them. "Morning, gorgeous."

Yoruichi stared with half lidded eyes as she placed one hand on a cocked hip. They both continued to stare at one another for several moments. And with each passing second the mirth in his gaze grew even as the annoyance in hers did the same. Finally, Yoruichi dropped her hand and smoothly walked over to him, his eyes following her with great amusement.

With a grace betraying her drowsy state, she slid into his lap and straddled him.

"Whoa, easy! Hot coffee here."

She ignored him and snaked her arms around him and buried her face into his neck. Silence fell and Yoruichi took in a breath, deeply inhaling Ichigo's scent of sweet citrusy orange with a tinge of sharp after shave. She sat content in lap, and the moment she felt his hand fall on top of her head and gently rub down her hair and back, she felt the strong lull back into dreamland.

She snuggled deeper into him as Ichigo kissed her hair and soft said, "Come on, princess. Breakfast is getting cold."

She let out some noncommittal hum.

"You haven't even brushed your teeth yet, have you?"

Another hum.

There was brief moment, and then Ichigo sighed and the next thing Yoruichi knew, he gripped her tightly and she felt the pull of gravity as she was lifted off the couch. Keeping her eyes closed, she wrapped her legs around his waist and rubbed her cheek against his shoulder.

Several minutes as he walked them through the house and back up the stairs. Then he set her down and the sudden coolness of the surface he had placed her on made her pull away from him and open her eyes. She looked around and frowned. He had brought her to the master bathroom.

"Sometimes you feel more like a kid than a wife," he muttered.

She gave him a pointed stare, but he ignored her and continued on. "Come on, arms up."

And she obliged him and not a second later she felt the T-shirt she had commandeered from his drawers lifted away and off her. Even as he did so, and her hair flailed wildly in the motion, Yoruichi blinked in surprise as a sudden epiphany dawned on her. Her husband just carried her up the stairs, in his arms, and stripped her naked in their bathroom.

And just like that, her flip was switched, and all semblance of sleep melted away instantly. A slow and mischievous smile spread across her lips, and Ichigo raised a single eyebrow in response. "What?"

In answer, she reached out and inserted a single finger into his jeans, tugging at the waistband.

He stared at her for full second before his trademark scowl made its way to his face. "You have got to be kidding me."

She gave an innocent shrug even as he stared down at her defiantly. But she knew him. The fact that he hadn't immediately said no and was still looking at her with an annoyed expression told her she had won.

And she was rewarded for her win as she let out a delighted scream when Ichigo quickly tore his shirt over head and then proceeded to crash his lips into hers.

A/N: discord .gg/JV97AUmAr7