Chapter 54

"You are really gonna go with Uwabami, of all people?" Jiro asked, still incredulous even after he'd explained his choice a number of times. The rest of the group around the table of the cafe they sat at weren't looking much more understanding, really.

Taking a deep breath in, Kazuki brought a hand to rub his eyelids tiredly.

"Yes, I'm going with Uwabami."

"Does she even count as a hero?" Jiro asked.

"She has to be, if she was allowed to send an internship offer," Yaoyorozu was the one to answer that one, although she didn't look like she understood either. "I got an offer by her though. I saw Midoriya's analysis of her. It was… something."

"I know you guys don't get it," he said tiredly, leaning back on his seat and grabbing the visor of his cap to lower it a little. The waitress had seen him, but everyone else seemed to have better things to do. Thankfully, either she already knew about him from previous visits or she didn't care to find out who he was now. "But she's the best one for me."

"But… Hawks, man," Mineta said, disbelieving. "Hell, if you wanted a hot chick Ryukyu was right there!"

"Yeah!" Jiro agreed, in a rare moment of doing that with Mineta in such a matter. They really didn't get it. Then again, the analysis Midoriya had given him about the woman was much more different than the one they'd likely seen if they had seen one at all. "Creepy, you gotta start making some sense soon or we'll talk to the teachers-"

"The teachers supported my choice," he said, and that seemed to shock them all even more. "She's the best choice for me, because I need Public Relations help more than I need anything else."

"But there was Gang Orca, surely he knows more than a glorified model, right?" Hagakure asked.

"No. No, he does not," he disagreed firmly. "He's got a reputation as some sort of villainous hero, but he's anything but. He's the furthest thing from me anyone could find, really. He's playing a role, leaning on a theme that might have been chosen or might have been dropped on him. The fact of the matter is that he's as clean as any hero ever has been, from what the world knows. That's why he's in the Top 10. His reputation is good despite that theme, hell, maybe his reputation is good because of that theme. His situation is nothing like mine."

Every one of his friends was listening intently now and Kazuki realized that maybe he should have addressed their worries more directly like this before. He just… He hadn't wanted to talk about it, because his situation sucked. He didn't want to dwell on that during moments when he should be happy or calm with his friends.

"Uwabami might not be the best hero in Japan. She might even be one of the worst ones, when it comes to being a hero. But if there's one thing she knows is how to play the PR game. She's had to deal with bad press before, clearly nothing on my level but then again… nobody has. At least no one that can help me," Kazuki continued, speaking curtly and staring at the cup of coffee in front of him. "She deals with the press, the public, like no other hero that sent me an internship offer does. So, I'll go with her… I'll go and try to learn how to deal with my situation. I can get stronger on my own, I can train, and come up with equipment and study protocols and… and a lot of other things," he continued, sighing.

Picking up one of the pastries they'd gotten, he looked at it as if he were studying it. In reality, he just needed an excuse to pause and let his mind gather itself. He was worried and nervous. He was very unsure, but his choice was made.

"I don't know how to get better at this though. So this is what I need help with," he finished, his eyes moving away from the snack and sweeping around the table, looking at every one of his friends there. "This is what I need help with, so I looked for the best and found it, found her."

He'd even sent her a message, because there'd been some concerning information regarding how serious she could be. Aizawa and Inui had said they talked with her too. Uwabami and his teachers had both reassured him that she would help him. There were doubts still, of course, but he liked to believe that it was just because this was very serious.

As it was, there was nothing else he could do.

"At least, I hope she is," he finished, taking a bite of the pastry and going silent as he turned to look at the street outside the window.

[}-o-{]

Kazuki only had two things to do at that very moment, take deep breaths and control his grimm.

Simple.

Not so simple when there were nine of them to keep his mind on. Fortunately, he wasn't crazy enough to think he could jump to that number. He could barely keep his mind split between seven of them and that was really pushing things. No, what he was doing was controlling Nevermores so that they'd just fly somewhat erratically in the air, not fighting and no other complex actions whatsoever. It was just the grimm flying around, which was the only reason he could get away with so many.

He didn't even have them try to dodge the incoming attacks, courtesy of Mineta, Yaoyorozu, Todoroki, Yanagi, Togeike and Monoma. 'What a group we make,' he thought, losing control of a Nevermore for a split second before focusing once more. They were doing some advanced target practice, basically, with everyone aiming for the flying creatures while he got some practice done controlling more grimm in a safer environment. Or, as safe as it could be, really.

It was certainly better than having to put extra focus so they held back in a battle or didn't go berserk. It was like the difference between shooting an unmoving target to a moving one, the jump in difficulty was there. Which was funny, considering the exercise was the exact opposite for everyone else, Kazuki supposed.

'Maybe I can push it a little,' he thought, glancing at Jiro, who was standing beside him with the knockout spray. Noticing his shift, since she was paying attention very closely to his grimm and him, the girl raised an eyebrow.

"More?"

"One more, and that's it," he said, his voice a little strained as his shadow extended slowly to create another grimm. He could have gone faster, especially after some of the training he'd been doing, but he felt like he was pushing hard enough on his limits. No need to go overboard when he wasn't even sure if he could actually control ten grimm at the same time. "Just the one," he muttered, taking a deep breath in afterwards to calm himself.

If only fighting were as easy as having the grimm moving around aimlessly. Now that was the dream. Maybe he'd get there one day, if he was super lucky and trained his ass off. As it was, he'd made plenty of progress from the mere three he'd come out of juvie being able to control. Then again, he'd gone from barely using his Quirk to using it and training it everyday, so there was that.

With any luck, he'd be able to keep on improving at the pace he was going.

"That's time, everyone!" Jiro called then, making him blink. 'What? Could have sworn… I guess that's that,' he thought, waiting for everyone to stop throwing attacks around before letting his Nevermore vanish into black smoke and dust. "Good job, Creepy," the girl beside him praised with a smile. "Not even a warning all day."

"Thanks," he mumbled, running his fingers through his hair. "I try," he commented, taking the water bottle she offered. "You can go do your own training if you want now."

"Don't mind if I do," she said, but she didn't leave. Instead, she kept talking. "It's no bother to help you train, Endo. Just to let you know."

"I'll keep that in mind," he replied with a smile, to which she nodded, happy to have gotten her point across. Then he was left alone while everyone started moving to their next training exercise, whatever they might be. Kazuki himself had decided he'd take a break, especially after pushing for that tenth grimm.

So, he pulled on the cheap earbuds he had and played some music for himself. He was honestly not sure what he wanted to buy more with the money he was saving. He could use it to get some nice headphones, he supposed, but he also wanted to save some more and get a violin of his own so he'd stop feeling bad for playing one of the ones in Jiro's store.

When someone sat beside him on the bench though, he had to pause the music and turn.

"Sorry for bothering you," Togeike said with a nervous expression. Funnily enough though, there wasn't that much nervousness in her emotions though. Kazuki had seen that happen sometimes though. Even though the emotions were strong enough to show on the outside, they were overwhelmed with positive ones that he couldn't see, so they were small on the inside.

"Not a bother at all," he replied with a smile that he hoped would help her relax a bit. "Did you need something?"

"I just wanted to tell you that… Well, I got an internship."

He blinked.

"You can get those as a Gen Ed student?" he asked, surprised.

"Not really, but… They said they made an exception for me. They said… They said I could join the Hero Course," the girl explained and by the end it was plain for everyone to see that she was barely containing her excitement. "Can you believe that? I could be a hero!" she exclaimed then as the dam broke, and he chuckled.

"I can believe that," he replied with a grin. However, he could sense actual doubt and nerves and fear in here… and he couldn't have that. "You'll be a great hero, I'm sure."

"I… I think Shinso might be getting a chance too. We both did well in the Sports Festival," she said then, and he was very disappointed to see and feel how her mood dimmed. "If I got a chance even after he beat me, then he definitely got a chance too."

"Well, I know who I want to join the Hero Course, I can tell you that," he told her firmly, earning a small smile from the girl. "Shinso hasn't been doing himself any favors with my class. I'm sure you heard."

"I was there," she said with a wider grin that looked like she knew she shouldn't be happy about the guy getting punched but was. "Still, the teachers-"

"The teachers know that he only won that battle because the conditions were unfavorable for you and the teachers are always around to check on me, so they definitely see that you are here more than him," he explained, trying to come up with any and all reasons why she should join instead of Shinso. He didn't know what he or his friends would do if the guy joined their class. "So, have some faith, yeah? Just continue doing your best and show them why you should be a hero."

"... Thank you," Togeike said, her voice thick with emotion. "I just, I couldn't have done it if you hadn't trained with me, or if you hadn't chosen me for your team. I know I couldn't have. So, this is because of you, Endo. If I can be a hero, it's because of you."

"You give me too much credit, To-"

"No," she interrupted firmly, straightening where she sat. "You did this for me, so… Thank you for helping me. I'll never forget this, Endo."

"... Don't mention it," he decided to reply to that with. "If you really want to thank me, then do your best."

"You can bet I will," she said with a grin that he just had to return.

[}-o-{]

"Thanks again for having me, ma'am," Kazuki said.

"Oh, I've told you that it's fine, Endo," Mineta's mother told him, which only made him draw in and smile even more shyly. "Truly, you make it sound like it'd be a bad thing to have you over," she added then, to which he had to bite his tongue, not only because his friend looked ready to go on a rant where he sat in front of him, but also because of the feelings of the woman herself.

Truth was that Kazuki could think of plenty of reasons why having him over was a terrible idea. One of such was the way people would react if they found out. That was also, admittedly, the main one, which would drag with it a whole wave of other problems on his friend's family. It also didn't help that, even though they were fine with him, they felt terrible about his situation.

When he'd first arrived and made a comment about how her food was a lot better than what he could prepare, the woman had told him "nothing like a good mother's cooking". There was no mistaking the emphasis she'd put on the word "good" either. She'd clearly seen at least something regarding Kazuki's mother and the emotions he picked up on at that moment and several times through his stay at the Mineta home were…

Intense.

They were also very comforting, because the woman had nothing but smiles to give him as he helped her prepare the food and helped his friend set up the table. Both of the Minetas had insisted he didn't need to do anything because he was a guest, but he'd just replied that he'd feel bad if he didn't. And wasn't that the truth? Not only because he didn't want to do nothing while they worked, but also because he wanted to repay some of their kindness.

Mineta had been a friend since before he even entered U.A. and he could even be considered his first real friend… ever.

Io had been an ally in juvie, someone to watch his back and someone who he could talk to without it coming back to bite him. It didn't feel like real friendship though, at least until they were both out of the hole. It had felt like they were friends more out of necessity than because they liked each other, back then. Because you needed to have someone in your corner and Io had been that for him.

Mineta wasn't like that. He was a normal friend, and the first one at that. Furthermore, he'd stuck with Kazuki all the way through until that point, regardless of any of the baggage that he carried. He knew he wasn't a great guy to have as a friend. People at school probably gave his friends a hard time. Hell, there were probably people outside school giving them a hard time. And that wasn't even accounting for all the help he needed, with his terrible state of mind, needing people to support him and even help him train.

And yet Mineta had stuck with him, just like the rest of their group.

Then, on top of that, was the guy's mother, who was just the best. Not only was she just very kind to him in general, he was fairly sure she was going out of her way to do things to make him comfortable. Like when she turned on the TV and his friend had been confused for a solid second before turning sad and angry at the completely normal animal documentary channel.

Kazuki was sure she'd put that instead of whatever she usually watched, maybe on some comment that Mineta had made about him liking animals. Considering his friend's emotional reaction, she probably watched the news, he guessed. Which would have been kind of awkward with about even odds of them talking about him.

And that was just one of the many things he'd noticed through the meal.

"Still," he pressed on for the first time that night. "I just… really appreciate it, ma'am," he continued, trying to convey his emotions as best he could with just his voice and his expression. "You don't know how much this means to me," he said, looking down at his plate. One, because it reminded him that it was a dish he'd commented on during his previous visit, and two, because he wasn't quite familiar enough with the woman to talk about his emotions that openly.

"Don't mention it, dear. A friend of Minoru's is always welcome here, as far as I'm concerned," the woman replied with a warm smile that made Kazuki both happy and uncomfortable at the same time. Had anyone ever smiled at him like that? Because he certainly had wished for it once upon a time, before giving up.

"Really lucky to have him as a friend then," he added, looking up at his friend, who looked and felt about as awkward as Kazuki himself did. It needed to be said though. He couldn't not let them know, when they were so… So important, to him, all of them.

"You can't just say things like that, man," Mineta mumbled, but he couldn't quite hide the smile tugging at his lips. "Besides, I'm lucky too," his friend added, pursing his lips and feelings of insecurity and loathing, self-loathing surfacing. "... I'll go get dessert," Mineta mumbled, pushing himself up before Kazuki could say anything.

Very deliberately, his friend didn't look at him.

"Mineta," he tried, before the other boy was already gone. Looking at the other person on the table, Kazuki saw the older Mineta smiling sadly at her son while he left. "I should…"

"Leave him, he needs a moment to get himself sorted out," the woman said, something that he very much doubted. Then again, she knew his friend better than he did, he supposed. It was just so difficult to pick up negative emotions from a friend and not do something that- "Thank you."

"... I have a feeling that that's not for helping cook or set the table," he said, drawing a giggle from the woman while he smiled uncertainly.

"No… I'm thanking you for being Minoru's friend," she told him with a kind, if sad, smile. The woman glanced towards where the aforementioned boy had left before continuing speaking. "I'm sure you know, but my son is not what one would call…"

"... Easy to make friends with?" Kazuki finished with a wry smile. Mineta was great and all, but nobody could deny that he had his… things that one had to get used to.

"That's one way of saying that, yes," the older Mineta replied with a smile. "I love him, but he hasn't done himself any favors, I have to say. It was hard for him for a while, so I just… I really appreciate the fact that he's not alone anymore. He has friends now, and to hear him say it, it's mostly because of you, so thank you."

"He gives me too much credit," Kazuki replied, trying to wave the woman off. "He's great, really. We are all lucky to have him as a friend."

"... You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear you say that," the woman said, and he didn't need to be told. He could feel the knot in her throat, even if he couldn't feel the positive emotions that brought that on. That, and he could see the tears in her eyes. "I can't do much, I'm afraid, but if you ever need anything, Endo, then don't hesitate to ask."

"I'll…" he started, before the words got stuck on the knot in his throat. "I'll keep that in mind," he finished, voice barely above a whisper.

"See to it that you do," she told him with a nod before both of them remained silently waiting for his friend to get back. It wasn't an uncomfortable silence though, it was the silence of two people that had said what they needed to say.

Eventually, Mineta got back and dessert was just as good as the rest of the meal, if not better. Or maybe Kazuki just thought it was because that was probably about as happy as he'd been as of late. Ever since… He was just generally in a good mood. Things were looking up, even if the looming presence of the news and his mother's words still haunted him. The public opinion and the gigantic roadblock that a situation like the Sports Festival had been were there too, to make things worse.

However, he was still going.

Kazuki still could put one foot in front of the other, one step at a time. He was feeling better, he decided, once he was done at the Mineta's place and making it back to his. His friends had his back if he needed to lean on someone. U.A. had his back if he needed help to keep pushing himself forward. There were people on his side, friends, teachers and even strangers.

It was frustrating, to be so weak that he needed so much help. He wished he could conquer his Quirk. He wished he could just grow used to it properly, to a point where the negative emotions stopped affecting him. He wished he could have perfect control over his Grimm. He wished… a lot of things.

Many of those things, Kazuki didn't believe he could get.

After living as long as he had, he didn't think that he'd ever have control over himself and his Quirk. The emotions would always be there, pushing just as strongly as they ever had. If he hadn't gotten used to them by then with the Black Rampage and the Sports Festival, then he likely never would. He hated that, he really did. Such was reality, however.

'I'll just have to be weak,' he thought with a bitter smile, reaching up to the visor of his cap and moving it a little as if adjusting it. It was dark at night, but he didn't want to take any chances when outside. 'I'll just have to accept I'm weak… and go from there.'

It sucked, but at least he wouldn't be alone in that path. His friends would be there to help him up when he needed it, just like he'd be there for them. Other heroes would have his back, just like he'd have theirs. That was fine. He didn't need to be the best by himself. He didn't even need to be the best at all.

He just needed to be good enough.

"I'm disappointed."

Kazuki closed his eyes.

"I'm disappointed… and I'm also sorry."

He sighed, a weary and shaky breath out that almost hurt. He couldn't take his fucking mind away from her words. Why? He didn't know why, but he sure wished he did. He just wanted to forget her, forget he'd seen and heard her. However, no matter how much he wished that, he couldn't stop himself from watching it over and over again.

As he entered his apartment once more, greeted by silence once more, he turned towards the TV.

"Take care, ok?" "You are the best, Endo."

"Be proud." "There's people on your side, Endo."

"If you need help, ask, no matter how small or bothersome you might think the matter to be, it's what we are here for."

He looked to the side of the TV, where the board with pictures of him and his friends was. Slowly, he moved to stand in front of it, taking a moment to look at each and every one of them. He remembered the moments where they were taken, he remembered conversations and feelings and…

"I'm lucky too."

With a deep breath in, he left the controller on the table and went to sleep.

[} Chapter End {]

Hey guys! How's it going?

That's some extra explaining as to the why of Kazuki's choice of hero to intern under. Hopefully that's enough for you guys to understand and agree. If not, some more of that and the actual internship will do the job. If not… Well, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it and I'll apologize, I guess.

Also some more training, fluff and angst for you guys.

Hope you guys enjoyed it and the chapter.

As always, if you can't wait until next week for next chapter, or if you just feel like supporting my writing, there's up to three new chapters in my Pa tre on:

P a treon . com (slash) AdrianKing

Discord Link: discord .gg/UTDransjJZ

Random Question: I've been getting questions and theories about who'll be Kazuki's romantic interest, which is a bit of a surprise, because it definitely wasn't something that I had in mind while starting this. I guess ships are just inevitable like that. Do you have a ship you prefer in regards to this fic? Not gonna be a relevant thing for a while, pretty sure, but people have me curious now.

See you.