Okay… let's do this one more time.

My name is Miguel O'Hara.

And I… wasn't bitten by a radioactive spider.

Because that is just dumb. So so dumb. First off there is no way that a spider would be able to survive being made radioactive, at least at the levels that everyone claims that spider was. I mean, think about it… if it were radioactive enough to be mutating it would be curled up on a ball in some corner slowly dying. Not wandering around biting people on the hand. And don't tell me 'well, maybe its just a little bit radioactive! You know that the subways in New York show radioactivity and-' Just don't. That is different and you know it. That is having low level radiation that doesn't change anything. All these Peter Parkers are claiming that they were bitten by spiders that were bombarded with radiation and that somehow allowed the Spider to transfer, through a BITE mind you, their genetic powers.

Yup. Injecting toxins into a human allows you to transfer your DNA. That makes a ton of sense.

I wasn't bitten by some radioactive spider that magically gave me superpowers. No. I was a scientist that was working on…

I was…

Okay, you want the truth? You want me to be honest? That's what everyone keeps demanding and you know I'm tired of everyone claiming that I'm lying to them or the like so yeah… I was working for Alchemax to create gene therapy that would allow us to have better industrial spies and espionage experts to take out our business rivals. There… I admit it. I was doing it to make criminals. To be able to steal rival companies' work. It was wrong, I get that now, but I know if I admit that I made a mistake everyone will judge me. Everyone judges me… a Peter Parker could be working on a nuclear bomb to blow up New York because he was mad that Flash Thompson tricked him into eating a urinal cake but that would all be forgiven the moment he began swinging around. I work for Alchemax and I'm Spider-Hitler.

And no, there is no Spider-Hitler. Why is that ALWAYS the first thing people ask when they learn about the multiverse?

So I was working with them but when I decided I didn't want to continue with human testing I-

-yeah. Okay, fine. You got me! I tested my work on prisoners. It was my idea. But I realized I was wrong! That's why I quit! Alchemax though, they didn't like that. They wanted their lead researcher to remain on their payroll. So they injected me with Rapture, a drug that only they are allowed to sell and that is highly addictive. I refused to be blackmailed by them so I used my genetics work to try and remove the drug from my genetics… and ended up gaining my powers.

And for 9 years I've been the one and only Spider-Man.

I fought against Alchemax. I… had some relationship issues. Learned who my real father was and fought against him. Drove both of the women I loved away… multiple times, to be honest. And I learned that my greatest enemy was my brother. I finally decided that I needed to find some happiness and traveled the multiverse…

…and yeah, I think you know the rest.

But that is okay. That's fine. Because I've learned that life doesn't give you an easy time of it. That you are always going to have to fight, sometimes kicking and screaming, to get what you want. That is just how reality is. And I'm okay with that.

Because I'm Spider-Man.

The only one that understands the multiverse.

The only one… willing to do what needs to be done.

~MC~MC~MC~

Miguel launched himself at the Spot without a second thought.

"I understand now!" he shouted as he began to twist and dodge the portals that the Spot was creating, avoiding them as he began to yank himself higher and higher into the air to get to the villain. "You are the canon event! He wouldn't listen to me and he tried to break from canon and so the canon events decided to make you! You're the Silver Surfer to its Galactus!"

The Spot tilted his head in confusion. "I feel like I should have followed that but… I really didn't?" He shrugged and formed several more portals that Miguel twisted away from only for these to unleash blasts of hot magma; the Spot must have formed them in volcanoes.

"Lyla, the shielding we used against that Sandman variant, the Pyroman!" Miguel snapped and his suit rippled as much of its systems shifted to protecting him against the heat. 'That's the problem with lava… it isn't the lava itself that kills you. It super heated the air, makes it so that can burn your lungs before it even gets to you.' He felt his suit working to quickly cool the air as he breathed in and out, to ensure that he didn't bake his own organs.

"I mean… I know I have issues. I'm quite up front about having them. Don't deny it. But I have to say… there is something wrong with that head of yours." The Spot shrugged and began to form more portals, these much smaller and firing off jet blasts of air that began to mess up Miguel's webslinging. "Also… what kind of Spider-Man are you, honestly? The real ones… they would be worried about the lava I just dumped down onto the city. But you don't even care, do you?"

"I care… but I know that I need to take you down first. I need to stop you so you can't destroy the entire multiverse!" Miguel grit his teeth and launched himself fast… far faster than the Spot was expecting. He slammed into him and raised his hand, ready to gut the threat. "And I am the real Spider-Man!"

"no… you aren't," the Spot said just as Miguel brought his hand down… and thrust it into the portal. He cried out, yanking it back to reveal gashes and cuts along the glove of his suit, blood oozing from the different cuts. "I was thinking about an industrial blender but then I thought 'cactus'. A lot of cactus. Or cacti."

Miguel grabbed the Spot by the throat and hurled him towards the ground, the villain creating another portal so that instead of hitting a building he landed nearby on a rooftop. "I am Spider-Man. You can hate the fact that I'm not wasting time cracking jokes. Or I don't agonize about what every little fluffy kitten will think of me if I focus on actually saving the world rather than getting it down out of the tree. But while they are wasting time goofing off I am being the god damn hero!"

"…this isn't about me, is it?"

The Spot formed several portals around Miguel and began to rapidly punch and kick him, switching from portal to portal so fast that Miguel couldn't figure out where he was coming from in order to counter.

"But while I might not be what you are focused on… I am focused on YOU!" Miguel did his best to block the blows but it was like fighting 10 different men, all limber and quick and able to evade out of his reach. "You stole him from me!" the Spot shrieked at him as he now added even more portals, forcing Miguel to land on a rooftop because he could no longer swing away. The black spots might allow one to pass from one area to another with easy but if you tried to ram into it they didn't dissipate like a fog. No, it was like hitting a wall and it left his body aching with a charge on his skin like he had just faced down an Electro. The Spot made more and more, all of them smaller, just allowing him to reach through and kick or punch Miguel, not enough for him to be able to escape. And when he tried to go on the offensive and punch back he found that many of the portals led back onto themselves, which resulted in his striking himself. At one point he found himself awkwardly having jabbed his leg through a portal only for it to appear by his shoulder, hooking under his arm pit. It had left him stumbling about, knocking into other spots, until he'd finally freed himself.

"Hey Boss?" Lyla said, suddenly appearing next to him. "The suit is taking a beating… readings are not liking whatever those portals are made of! Every time you get hit by one it is screwing up all the sensors."

"Yeah, I figured!" Miguel snarled as he curled up tighter in on himself, holding out his arms and squatting down to try and brace himself. "You got anything that can help? Where are the others?"

"Well, since you decided to take Chris' place in distracting the Spot they apparently decided to let you serve as a distraction. Honestly, Miguel, at this point would you be surprised if they all went to get some Shawarma?"

"God I hate that cliché!" Miguel snapped.

"Aw, come on, its not a cliché… it's a canon event."

"Not-" Miguel grunted when a strike hit him right on the face, making his jaw ache something fierce. He wiggled his mouth and knew at once that something had gotten knocked out of place. "Adjustment!" he managed to get out.

"Right," Lyla said as she waved her hand and his suit constricted, Miguel snarling in pain as it squeezed his head until his jaw popped back into place. "Now then-"

And that's when Lyla walked right into a portal.

Her entire form glitched and spasmed and she let out a scream as her entire form distorted, becoming elongated for a moment, twisting like taffy, eyes and mouth becoming thin and tall and black, before she suddenly snapped back to normal, panting hard.

"Why… why am I breathing?" she asked. "I don't need to breath! Is this what it feels like to have a panic attack! I wasn't designed to panic!"

"Lyla!" Miguel cried out.

"I… boss, its not safe for me-"

"Get out of here!" Miguel shouted and at once Lyla dissipated.

The Spot chose that moment to stick his head through a portal right abve Miguel, able to look down at him while also remaining just out of reach. He stopped punching him too, though that was less about giving him some relief and more about him reveling in his mockery.

"Look at you… big strong Spider curled up like a widdle baby," the Spot cooed. "Come on… hit me." A portal appeared next to his head. "One of these HAS to lead to my skull, right? Give it a good ol' whack… that's what you're best at, right?"

"You… you don't know-"

"Oh, but I do know. See, you think you are stronger than me and smarter than me but boy are you VERY wrong. You aren't stronger… you're just bulkier, but that means there is more of you to hit. And you certainly aren't smarter than me… I was helping to design weapons of terror when I was 20 years old while you can only rush about clobbering things. I am a genius… you are a stupid clod."

Miguel grit his teeth at that. Normally he rather enjoyed people thinking he was stupid. While it hadn't been as often back when he'd first started nowadays everyone saw him as a big dumb lug because of his build. Which he enjoyed… it put them off their game, thinking that they could easily take him down and outsmart him. Pull the lamest tricks imaginable and he'd fall for them. He so did love it when he turned the tables on them, revealing that he'd plotted around their plots.

But having found himself outsmarted…and by his own short-sightedness?

'You thought they were embellishing how dangerous he was,' Miguel mentally hissed. 'You thought Morales was playing up how tricky the Spot was. Thought that what the team saw when he attack Alchemax was them just not being ready for him. Thought Chris was a loudmouth who had allowed himself to slip into the Spot's trap and you'd be able to prove to everyone that you still were the best.' He narrowed his eyes. 'Well, O'Hara, you still can do that. You just-'

The Spot cracked him right along the back of his neck, causing him to topple into more of the Spots that fried his already overtaxed suit, causing bits and pieces of it to fail, revealing his skin.

"Now now," the Spot said, reaching down and grabbing his head, forcing him to look up at him. "You need to be paying attention to this. Its really important." Though he couldn't see his face he knew the Spot was smirking. Or leering. Either or. "You took him from me… my enemy. My nemesis. You killed him and now I am going to make you suffer. I was going to destroy this world so he knew that he was useless and pathetic, just like he made me feel when we first met. But now I think I will find where YOU call home, Miguel… and I am going to tear it apart, piece by piece. Not destroy it… no, that would be too easy. I think I'll just snag up neighborhoods and cities and plant them in different parts of the multiverse." His grip became all the harder, making Miguel hiss in pain. "Cut houses right down the middle when I do so too… that way poor little families with mummy and daddy and brother and sister are forever separated. And I will make sure they know it is YOU to blame. So that they tell all their new neighbors just who ruined their lives. Let them spread the gossip of how powerful the Spot is… and how evil Miguel is."

He paused.

"…or maybe I'll just crush your skull right here. That might be a hoot!"

If I'm crazy, I'm on my own
If I'm waitin', it's on my throne
If I sound lazy, just ignore my tone
'Cause I'm always gonna answer when you call my phone

The Spot suddenly looked up, confused by the sudden music that was playing. Miguel had to admit that he was confused too… was there some Spider out there that had decided to break from the plan too? One that was music themed? The multiverse was strange like that and in the last few months had had been outsourcing who was recruited to the Society to others…

And how sad was that, he now realized, that he'd become so obsessed with figuring out canon events that he didn't even vet the people he brought in to deal with them?

"Oh?" The Spot said, tilting his head in confusion. "What is this? You have some little friend here to assist you? A distraction perhaps? Or do you always have music play right before you die?" He pressed his fingers tighter against Miguel's head, making his vision grow fuzzy as the nerves in his forehead went haywire under the pressure. "Well? What is it?"

Like, what's up, danger? (Danger)
Like, what's up, danger?

"Is this suppose to scare me? Frighten me?" The Spot demanded. "You think some song is going to make me nervous? Who the hell do you think you are?"

Miguel turned just in time…

Can't stop me now!

…to see Miles swing in, slamming his feet right into the Spot, causing him to go flying back into the ledge of the roof, his spots disappearing due to the sudden blow. Miles though didn't merely start and finish with that blow. No… he fired off two weblines and pulled, yanking the Spot back at him and punching him across the jaw, causing the villain to wobble and stumble from the series of rapid directional changes.

I said, "I got you now"

Miguel quickly got to his feet and fired off his own webline, snagging the Spot's ankles and pulling on them so he landed on his face, letting out a grunt of pain. Miles leapfrogged Miguel and landed on the Spot's back, driving him hard into the roof. The Spot let out a groan and threw out his hand to make a portal but Miles fired some webbing at his wrist, forcing it down onto the roof and trapping it before he kicked at the Spot's side, causing him to flip onto his back with his arm twisted in a painful angle. Miguel rushed forward and punted his foot right into the Spot's chin, causing his head to snap back and his arm to stretch to the point that Miguel thought he might actually dislocate the limb before Miles' webbing finally snapped, allowing the Spot to tumble along the roof.

I'm right here at your door
I won't leave, I want more
What's up, danger?
Yeah, what's up, danger?

The Spot got up and threw out several Portals only for Chris to suddenly appear behind him, clapping his hands against the sides of the Spot's head where his ears were, making the villain cry out and stumble into one of the large portals he had made, arm going through. A second later he screamed and ripped his arm free, Gwen following after him, landing in a crouch on his chest before she kicked off, sending her spinning gracefully through the air while the Spot was sent right into Hobie who hit him across the back with his guitar. That sent him crashing right into Peni and her mech, who caught the Spot and threw him right at Pavi and Spinneret, the two delivering two twin kicks to his sides that had the Spot slumping to his knees.

"Who do I think I am?" Miles asked as he landed next to Miguel, the rest of the first squad of Spiders moving to back them up.

Can't stop me now, yeah
I said, "I got you now"

"I'm Spider-Man."

Come on, what's up, danger?
Come on, I said, "What's up, danger?"