She was going to have to talk to Chakotay eventually, she knew. They were able to avoid each other for the most part during this First Contact, but their time with the Lursanians was ending. Then it was on to the next stop on Q's itinerary, and thus on to more potential conflicts with her Second in Command.
But she would worry about Chakotay tomorrow. Today, she was free to do whatever she wished, and at the moment, she wished for an early morning cuddle with her lover.
Q always slept on his stomach or on his side. Kathryn had expected him to be a total bed hog, but he was surprisingly judicious about keeping to his side of the mattress when they were sleeping. Kathryn wondered with amusement where Q learned his human bedroom etiquette—was there a human manual of some sort? Had he simply read her mind and learned all her preferences? She suspected the latter, but it didn't concern her; she was happy.
Q was on his stomach, face buried in his pillow, snoring lightly. Kathryn checked to see he was breathing freely—he was, but she wasn't sure how in that position—and curled up next to him. She wrapped her arm and leg over his torso and buried her face into his warm neck.
"Mmm," Q rolled towards her and slid his arms around her. He rolled back and clasped her against his chest. "Hello," he rumbled fondly.
"Hello," she pressed her face against his pajama shirt and inhaled. He reciprocated by fisting his hand in her hair and burying his nose in it. They lay together in the quiet dark simply enjoying contact with one another.
"A whole day off," Q mused quietly to the ceiling. "Kathryn Janeway, what are you going to do with a whole day off?
"More excited about what I'm not going to do," she yawned. "Not getting out of this bed, for one."
"An excellent choice," Q rumbled.
"No work," she mumbled.
"MmHmm," Q agreed.
They dozed lazily together for another hour. I could do this all day, Kathryn thought blissfully, but suddenly Q's stomach grumbled beneath her, and she choked back a laugh.
"I'm sorry, darling," Q groaned. "I wasn't going to move, I swear."
"Don't be silly," she grinned. "Let's replicate breakfast and eat it in here. Computer, lights!"
"Yes! What would you like?" he was instantly awake, rose from the bed and kissed the top of her head. "Scrambled eggs, toast, coffee?" he suggested as he moved toward the replicator in the next room.
"Yes, please!" she called out.
He returned with a bed tray and a feast. Happiness bubbled within her as Q set the tray of hot food and drinks down carefully onto the mattress, then crawled back under the blankets with her and brought the tray up for them both to use. They leaned against one another and enjoyed a slow, leisurely meal together.
"My goodness, I love eating food," Q sighed contentedly. "As a Q, I never need to eat anything—which is a marvelous way of living to be certain, Kathryn, and I would highly recommend it—but it's very satisfying and pleasurable to satiate the human feeling of hunger by eating something delicious."
"You're very wise," Kathryn intoned.
"I am," Q smirked.
"You know, I've never seen you in any form besides this human one," she mused. "What's the true form of a Q like?"
"I'd say it's less of a form and more of a state of consciousness or being…or maybe awareness?" Q thought carefully. "To put it in your scientific terms, the Q are fifth-dimensional beings. We have unlimited control of space, time, and matter in this universe, but not in any other."
"The Continuum is not a different universe?"
"Correct. The Continuum is in a different dimension."
"The fifth dimension?" Kathryn clarified.
"Yes, and unlike the fourth dimension, or what you call 'time', the fifth dimension is not at all perceptible to humans. Humans are three-dimensional beings who exist at one point in time. You can only perceive the passing of time, but if you were fourth-dimensional beings, you could perceive all points in time simultaneously, and exist at any point you wanted," Q explained.
"So, as a fifth-dimensional being, you're not just able to perceive all space and matter and time, you're also able to make permanent changes?" She confirmed.
"Correct! My goodness, you certainly are smart for a three-dimensional being," Q quipped, pecking her affectionately on the cheek and winking at her. Kathryn snorted and rolled her eyes.
"But as three-dimensional beings, we don't yet perceive all of space and matter," Kathryn pointed out. "We're still researching dark matter and quantum matter—we're still trying to understand their effects on the space/time continuum. We still don't know everything about black holes—will we ever attain that knowledge?"
"Oh Kathy," Q chortled. "You know I'm not allowed to tell you such things! But, I will say you're currently moving in the right direction as a species."
"Great, thanks," she rolled her eyes. "What would happen to you if you traveled to another universe?"
"I'm not certain," Q pondered. "But I believe that universe would organize my data into whatever version of me made the most sense there, but it would be a risk-not every universe can contain a fifth-dimensional being; ours is somewhat unique."
"Humans have traveled to other universes," she pointed out.
"Well bully for the three-dimensional humans!" Q snorted.
"But maybe we explore another universe, and that universe interprets you to be a sixth-dimensional being!" she argued.
"Highly unlikely, my dear. Believe me, it's been attempted. The Q have tried to evolve via inter-universal travel many times," he looked up from his food. "But of course, if you have an opportunity to explore another universe, I'd happily support your endeavor! Keep the lights burning at home, so to speak."
"Thank you, Q," she replied ruefully. "I'll keep that in mind."
Kathryn took a moment to drink her coffee and think about what it would be to have a relationship with Q when he regained his powers. What would change? What would stay the same? Could a fifth-dimensional being and a third-dimensional being even sustain a relationship? Surely he would get bored with her limitations and leave. Or worse, he'd stay and develop a callous indifference to her inferior existence. She would age, he would not. Hell, she was mortal, and he was not. She imagined their time together like a brief flicker of light in the universe of Q's existence—one of a billion. She imagined him shedding a few tears at her funeral, then glibly moving on with his infinite life. Was that how this would all end?
There was a sudden lump in Kathryn's throat. She had thought of these things before, of course, but now, with this conversation, they seemed devastating and insurmountable. She looked away from Q and stared determinedly at the wall, blinking at the tears stinging in her eyes. Dammit!
"Would you like another cup of coffee, my love?" Q asked blithely, rising and making his leisurely way toward the replicator.
"Yes, please," she cleared her throat. While Q faced the replicator, she rose from the bed and made a beeline behind him for the bathroom. "I'll be out in a moment!"
Safe behind the bathroom door, she put her hands on the counter and looked into the mirror. Her hair was mussed from sleep, her skin was sallow and the bags under her eyes were as prominent as ever. She cringed to think she had looked like this all morning in front of Q—especially since Q was nearly always perfectly tailored and unrumpled.
Or maybe he wasn't and she had stopped noticing his imperfections under the haze of her infatuation with him. Maybe she even liked his imperfections now when she saw them, like the fine wrinkles around his eyes and how they crinkled up when he smiled at her, or the way he snored lightly in his sleep and the sound of it lulled her into unconsciousness as well…
She was tearing up again.
What is wrong with me? What is WRONG with me? Kathryn splashed some cool water on her suddenly boiling eyes and patted her face dry with a towel. She gnawed on the inside of her cheek and began to pace the length of the bathroom in her satin pajamas. A fifth-dimensional being, she thought. He's a fifth-dimensional being, and I'm a third-dimensional being that can barely perceive the fourth dimension. Never had anyone put it so plainly to her before, so scientifically. Never had she been so aware of the discrepancy between their respective species. What was it like to have to come down to her level all the time? To be only one thing when he could be anything? To exist at one only place and point in time when he could go anywhere, whenever he chose. She cringed again and sat down at the edge of her bathtub.
Kathryn was being paranoid and insecure, she knew, but she couldn't seem to stop herself. What does he get out of it? she wondered. Maybe it was the fact that her lifetime with him would be so comparatively brief? He could easily play human with her for what, to him, would only seem like a few hours. Then he could casually move on to the next thing or person that interested him. It didn't bother her that he would live so much longer than her, or that he might have other loves after her—it was the idea that she might be more like a pet to him than a person, like a dog he was going to spoil for now during its short life and then remember fondly later, years after she passed on.
Ouch, she winced at the thought. Yikes. She stood and resumed pacing the tiled floor.
I should just go out there and talk to him, she thought rationally. He's done so much for me and for this crew. He's here with me now, in human form, and he doesn't have to be. He says he loves me, and he's done nothing to make me doubt him. He hasn't treated me like a lesser being, at least not that I can tell…but can I trust my own assessment where my feelings are involved?
She really needed another person to talk to. This was maddening.
The lightest tap on the bathroom door made her jump.
"Dearest, are you almost finished in there? You of all people know the effect of coffee on a human body!" Q called out politely.
"I'll be right out!" she responded, momentarily feeling trapped and resentful that her space was no longer just her own. She used the toilet and washed her hands and face one more time to remove all traces of her mental instability, then left the safety of the bathroom.
"Excuse me, please!" Q brushed past her quickly, taking the opportunity to pat her lightly on the butt as he did so. She grinned foolishly at him as the door closed, then schooled her face when she realized what she must look like.
Surveying the room, she noticed Q had recycled their breakfast dishes and made up the bed. Warm appreciation flooded her system for the efforts he made to keep their quarters clean. She didn't know when her quarters became their quarters, but it didn't feel wrong; it felt good, despite the one bathroom.
I can talk to him, she thought. Everything will be fine.
When Q emerged from the bathroom, he looked at her hopefully.
"What do you say to a long soak in the tub with me?" he chirped. "There are so many bathing products I haven't tried yet!"
Kathryn laughed. "Sure."
"Oh, but first," Q moved to the dresser and retrieved something from one of his drawers. "I have something for you!" He presented her with a small gift bag. "It's sort of a 'happy first First Contact' present, but I wanted to give it to you today, on your day off," he grinned.
"Q!" she cried out in delight. "This is so thoughtful!"
"Open it! Open it!" he pushed the bag into her hands.
Kathryn opened the bag and pulled out a beautiful swathe of silken fabric that rippled and gleamed like liquid bronze in the light. She gasped at it in awe as she held it up for examination.
"It's a scarf from one of the Lursanian home worlds. I saw it during one of those diplomatic tours we took and thought of you immediately, my dear," Q explained as she moved to her dresser mirror to see what the scarf looked like on her.
The material was as light as a spider's web, but the fabric was strongly woven. When she wrapped it around her neck, the effect was as if she were draped in golden-brown molten metal. The color picked up the warmth of her hair and complexion, and it made her cool blue eyes practically pop out of her face in contrast.
"It's beautiful!" Kathryn breathed, feeling half-awake.
" I made sure it was added to the inventory of one of the very first trade agreements, and I've been hiding it from you ever since," Q came up from behind and gleefully wrapped his arms around her while she watched him in the mirror. "I was right, it's perfect and it looks stunning on you," he boasted and then studied their reflections for a moment. "What a handsome couple!"
"Thank you, Q," she turned in his arms and beamed up at him. "I absolutely love it."
"Good," he pressed his forehead to hers. "Only the best for my favorite human."
Kathryn cringed. She knew what he meant, she knew what he meant, but suddenly the words spoiled pet popped into her mind, and she couldn't help but think, Good girl, now you get a treat.
"What's wrong?" he noticed the change in her expression immediately. She shook her head to reassure him everything was fine, but suddenly those stupid tears were stinging her eyes again, and he saw them before she could do anything about it. "Oh, Kathryn!" he cried. "What is it?"
"It's not a big deal, it's nothing," she stepped away from him and rubbed furiously at her traitor eyes. "I'm just…a little overwhelmed, I think," she cleared her throat.
"I don't understand," Q reached for her, but she stepped away from his grasp and winced at the hurt in his face when he noticed. "Did I do something wrong?"
"No! No," she tried to reassure him. "I'm fine, everything's okay. I think I just need a little time to myself."
"Right now?" Q was completely flummoxed. "Why? Are you sure?"
"Yes, it's not a big deal, I promise," the Captain attempted to placate him. "Just give me, maybe, two hours here, alone. Would that be all right? Just a couple hours to myself."
"You want me to leave and come back in two hours?" Q repeated slowly, still confused.
"Yes, that's right," Janeway nodded.
"You're certain about this?"
"Yes," she nodded again.
Q opened his mouth to maybe protest, but closed it again.
"Where would you like me to go?"
"Oh! Anywhere you want. Maybe the Mess Hall for a bit?" she suggested ever-so-helpfully.
"I'll need to change," Q pointed to his pajamas.
"Right! I'll just, um…" Kathryn moved out of way to the dresser and went to sit down in her living room for a moment while Q put on fresh clothes. A few seconds later, he stood before her in charcoal pants and finely-knit, royal blue sweater. "You look nice," she complimented him, but he only looked at her warily.
"Kathryn, if I did something to upset you, you absolutely must tell me what it is," he crossed his arms in front of his chest.
"You didn't do anything, Q! Please, we can talk when you return," she tried again.
"So there is something we need to discuss," Q huffed. "I insist you tell me what it is! Right now!"
"I need some time to think first!" she bit out and rose to her feet. "Can you please let me just have a minute to myself?"
Q sighed deeply and looked down at the floor.
"Very well," he growled a moment later. "I'll be back here in exactly two hours."
"Thank you," she sighed. "That's all I need."
He looked at her, his expression inscrutable. He took a couple steps towards the door and looked back at her again. Kathryn did her best to look encouraging. Q shook his head in displeasure, clearly at war internally, but finally he sighed in resolution and walked out into the corridor.
Kathryn moved to her nightstand and picked up her COMM badge.
"Janeway to Torres," she called out.
"Torres here, Captain."
"Are you currently on duty?"
"Yes, Captain—do you need help with something?" B'Elanna sounded perplexed.
"I do, Lieutenant, but it's…it's an issue of a personal nature. Do you have a moment to report to my quarters?" Janeway was appalled at how desperate she sounded, but B'Elanna immediately responded.
"On my way, Torres out."
Janeway looked down and realized with a shock that she was still wearing Q's gift. She regretfully removed the lovely scarf and put it back into its gift bag. It was a shockingly beautiful present. Q had exquisite taste for certain.
Kathryn was putting a cardigan on over her pajamas when the door chime sounded.
"Come in!" she called out, and B'Elanna rushed inside, still very pregnant.
"Is everything alright, Captain?"
"No," the Captain responded bluntly, unsure of where to start. "I need someone to talk to, and you're my best option," she blurted out.
"Okay," B'Elanna smirked, sitting down on the couch and making herself comfortable. "Should I be worried?"
"I'm not certain," Janeway sighed, sinking into the couch next to her Chief Engineer. "It's about Q."
"Oh, I see," B'Elanna nodded sagely. "You need to talk about your relationship."
"Yes," Kathryn groaned and put her head in her hands. "It's pathetic, I know, but please tell me it's alright and you don't mind."
"It is alright, and I don't mind," B'Elanna laughed. "Besides, who could pass up the inside scoop on the ship's newest, hottest couple? Not me."
Kathryn groaned again and looked up. "Is the rumor mill swirling?"
"Not rumors so much as observations," B'Elanna smiled. "Nothing inappropriate, but you two are definitely a very popular topic of conversation," she leaned in. "So what's going on?"
Kathryn paused and considered how best to voice this morning's fears aloud.
"Do you think Q is capable of caring for me on the same level that I would care about another human being?" she asked.
"Do you mean, is he capable of loving you?" B'Elanna frowned.
"Not exactly," Kathryn shook her head. "He's capable of love, I'm sure, but is it the type of love one has for another person, another equal, or is it the type of love one person might have for maybe, a beloved animal…?" she trailed off.
"Does Q think you're his pet?" B'Elanna looked horrified. "Has he said that?"
"No! Not at all," Janeway waved her hands. "This is a personal worry of my own creation."
"Well that's terrible!" B'Elanna snorted. "How'd you come up with that?"
Kathryn briefly explained what Q had said about different dimensional beings and her concerns about the inequities between them.
"So you're worried you love him more than he loves you?" As usual, B'Elanna cut straight to the point. Kathryn gaped at her like a fish out of water.
"I mean, I wouldn't say I love Q," She sputtered.
"Really?" B'Elanna countered. "I mean, the way I see it, you're panicking because you're in pretty deep," she looked over at the Captain smugly. "It hurts you a lot to think he might not reciprocate everything you're feeling, right?"
Kathryn was quiet.
"And it doesn't really make sense that Q would…what? Love you like the targ I had growing up?" the Chief Engineer laughed, "For one, I wasn't attracted to the targ, and two, Q hasn't tried to control you or treat you like he thinks of himself as your master, has he?"
The Captain shook her head.
"Well, there you have it. Sounds to me like you need to stop self-sabotaging and talk to him about all of this. I'll bet you anything he trips all over himself to make you feel better," B'Elanna grinned. "When he sees you, he gets the exact same moony look on his face Tom used give me when we were first dating."
"He does?"
"MmHmm," B'Elanna sighed happily at the memory.
"He gave me a present," Kathryn admitted sheepishly. "Can I show it to you?"
"Um, Yes! Wait—what kind of present?" B'Elanna snickered.
"Nothing scandalous!" Kathryn chuckled and retrieved the molten bronze scarf from her bedroom.
"Oh, damn…" the half-Klingon's expression was immediately envious as she held the dark, glossy fabric. "Okay, you need to have him speak to Tom. I need one in blue, immediately."
"I'll make the suggestion," Kathryn smirked.
"So after Q gave you this, you just kicked him out?" B'Elanna teased.
"Oh, god," the Captain hid her face with her hands in shame. "That's exactly what I did."
"If it makes you feel any better, I've freaked out much worse on Tom, and he's still around."
"Great. Thanks," Kathryn tried not to roll her eyes.
B'Elanna stood up carefully and handed the scarf back.
"Just talk to him, it will all be okay," she assured Kathryn. "But if not, just please don't break up with him before we get a new plasma manifold for the Delta Flyer."
"Okay, you're dismissed," the Captain scoffed.
"I have to get back to engineering anyway," B'Elanna smirked. "Don't waste your day off on this, seriously Captain."
"Thank you," Janeway replied warmly. B'Elanna gave her a small wave and left the Captain alone with her thoughts.
She felt terrible for asking Q to leave, but B'Elanna's counsel had proved invaluable, and she did not regret seeking out her Chief Engineer.
You're panicking because you're in pretty deep, B'Elanna said. It landed like a punch to the gut, but she was right. I care about Q very much, Kathryn thought. She was not ready to say she 'loved' Q—not yet.
It was 10:30 hours. Q was due back in half an hour, so she had a little time to prepare for their "talk". His idea of soaking in the bathtub together still sounded wonderful, so she decided to prepare the bathroom. She filled the enormous tub with scalding hot water and some bubble bath. She gathered all of her bath products, lotions and potions, and set them in a basket on the side of the tub for Q to peruse. She set out some candles in strategic locations and lit them for ambiance. She gathered fluffy towels and replicated icy bottles of champagne for each of them.
Moments later, the front door wooshed open and shut.
"Kathryn?" Q called out.
"In here!" she called back.
Q entered the bathroom and looked around somewhat suspiciously.
"Hello," she chirped as he took in her efforts. She stood up and handed Q an open bottle of champagne. "I missed you," she wrapped her arms around him and squeezed tight. Q wrapped one arm around her and examined the champagne in his other hand.
"What's going on in here?" he queried, taking a swig from his bottle and nodding approvingly.
"Bathtub party," she deadpanned. "No man left unscrubbed. Captain's orders."
"I see," he mused and looked down at her face. "I'm not sure I'm in the right state of mind for this…party."
"Oh no? That's unfortunate," Kathryn removed her cardigan and let it slide to the floor. "I was looking forward to your company in here." She casually removed her satin pajama top, lifting it over her head to expose her bare chest and letting it also drop to the floor.
"Kathryn…" Q growled in warning, his eyes locked on her breasts.
"A nice, calm, relaxing soak—I think we could both use it," she untied the drawstring of her satin pajama pants and inserted her thumbs under the fabric at her hips. Kathryn turned her back to Q, and pulled her remaining clothing down over lower half until her pants and underwear were on the floor as well. She turned and looked at him shyly and held out her hand. "Get in here and let's talk while we relax."
Q took her hand and helped her step into the tub.
"Oooh, it's hot," she warned, slowly lowering herself into the steaming water.
"Good," he chuckled quickly shedding his own clothes, hanging them carefully over the door, and climbing in next to her. "I loathe a lukewarm bath."
Once they were both fully submerged, Q pulled Kathryn into his lap, her back against his chest, and held her there so she wouldn't float away.
"Drink?" he asked and handed her the open champagne bottle.
"Why, thank you," she purred and took a generous swig. Q took a decent pull from the bottle as well before setting to the side of the tub. His hands trailed over her body idly and he placed a kiss on the side of her neck.
"Kathy," he murmured after a moment, holding her close as the steam rose around them. "My sweet, wild Kathryn…I love you. Tell me. Tell me what's wrong. Please."
Kathryn groaned.
"You're going to think I'm a fool," she whispered back to him, grateful he couldn't see her face.
"Never," he hummed into her shoulder.
"Are you sure? I mean, at some point, isn't a fifth-dimensional being bound to think a third-dimensional being is…beneath them?" she sighed and looked back at him.
"Is that what you're worried about?" he cried in disbelief. "Oh no! Kathryn, no!" He held her tightly in reassurance. "I couldn't care less that you're not a Q! In fact, it may be one of my favorite things about you! Oh, darling!" There was some splashing as he turned her around in his lap to face him. "The Q may be omnipotent, but we are not infallible! You're worth a dozen of any Q."
The stupid tears were back in her eyes. She looked up at the ceiling and attempted to blink them away.
"I just don't understand how you could ever see me as your equal, under the circumstances," she muttered. "And if you don't see me as your equal, then maybe you love me more like I would love…a puppy."
Q snorted in disgust.
"Kathryn, you are not my puppy! I may have some abilities that you don't have, but you're not a dog by comparison! You must know you're my equal in every way that matters! My goodness!" he looked completely baffled, then focused on her intently. "I left it to you to decide Q's mortal fate when the Continuum would have simply left him locked up for eternity. When the entire Continuum was at war, I came to you for help, didn't I? And when I completely failed as a father, who did I rely on to co-parent Junior and teach him how to be thoughtful and empathetic? Certainly not his Q mother!" Q scoffed and rolled his eyes. "For a puny third-dimensional human being, you've done quite well for yourself."
He grasped the champagne bottle and held it to his mouth, drinking deeply. When he was done, he offered it to her. She accepted but did not drink.
"Have I disrespected you in some way?" Q frowned. "Did I make you feel like less than what you are to me? Where did these thoughts come from, my love?"
"I told you," Kathryn groaned against his chest. "I'm paranoid and foolish." She wrapped her arms around him, stomach to stomach, and floated slightly above him in the water. "But I couldn't help wondering…what will you do when I grow old? What will you do when I die?" she sighed against him. "And won't I be just be one of your infinite experiences? One of your many loves?" Kathryn cringed at how insecure she sounded and pressed her face into Q's chest so he couldn't see her idiotic expression.
Q chuckled.
"These are important questions, I know," he began, holding her closer and sinking them both a little deeper into the hot water. "And unfortunately, there are no easy answers for any of them. We will have to have several discussions—something we can't do if you continue to cast me out," he added pointedly. "The Mess Hall, of all places," he added with distaste, looking down at her face. "If you're going to banish me, at least book me some time on the Holodeck, woman!" he snickered, and Janeway chuckled ruefully.
"I'm sorry," she sighed. "Really, I am. I needed some time to calm down and think things through before I could talk to you. I could have gone about it better, I know," she grimaced.
"You're forgiven," Q replied smoothly. "I accept your efforts to make amends," he lifted a soapy hand and gestured appreciatively to the candlelit room. "Now, as far as this concern about my 'infinite experiences' and 'many loves'," He continued, all business. "I believe I've already submitted a great deal of evidence to the court on this matter," he smirked and rolled them both gracefully on their sides in the water, so they were facing one another. "Have I not made it abundantly clear that my feelings for you are genuine?" He murmured, watching her face intently. "Is it not blatantly obvious to you that this relationship is unlike anything I've ever experienced in my existence?"
"I mean…yes." Kathryn nodded, blushing, feeling foolish.
"Look where we are, Kathryn! Look at what we're doing!" he practically giggled and splashed a little water in her direction. "And even if I'd done this a thousand times before with a thousand other females, it would still be unique and wonderful because it's you. In all the cosmos, there is only one Kathryn Janeway—trust me, I would know."
"Yes, you would," she murmured, feeling reassured. "Come here," she leaned in and kissed him. He responded enthusiastically, pulling her into his lap so that she was straddling him and holding her mouth firmly against his. He kissed her affectionately, but also to comfort her, wrapping his arms around her and anchoring her to the bottom of the tub. Her groin made contact with his, and his cock twitched against her hopefully. He moaned against her mouth and pulled away to catch his breath.
"You're going to kill me," he pretended to complain. "All you have to do is look at me and this wretched human body sends all its energy straight to my cock. It's madness!"
Kathryn laughed knowingly and Q scowled.
"It's a wonder your species ever made it out of the jungles and learned to put on clothes," he grumbled, making her laugh again. She un-straddled him to offer him some relief and lay next to him with the water up to her chin. He looked over at her adoringly and took her hand, then looked past her at the basket of shampoos and soaps she complied earlier. "Ooh, Kathryn, let's not fight anymore and get all cleaned up instead!" he sat up in the steaming water and reached for the basket. "Can I wash your hair? Will you wash mine? I've always thought that would be so romantic!"
"Yes, of course," she chuckled and reached for the tub's spray nozzle to wet down her hair.
For the next hour they took turns washing and rinsing each other, keeping the conversation light. Kathryn marveled over Q's enthusiasm for bath products. He loved opening everything and asking what it was for. He had no qualms over how 'womanly' the products smelled—though he did admit to wanting to replicate items more suited to himself for next time. When she introduced him to her skincare products, he was thrilled and immediately began applying a soothing clay mask to his face.
"Here, these are for your eyes," she passed him a jar of cucumber eyemasks.
"What are they for?" he chirruped, taking one slippery sheet for each eye and laying them over his closed eyeballs.
"To soothe and depuff and de-wrinkle, and help with dark circles," she read from the side of the jar.
"Marvelous," Q laid back against the side of the tub, the perfect picture of self-care in his face mask and eye-cucumbers. "Oooh! They tingle!"
"That's how you know they're working!" she chuckled. "Do you want to try some lip scrub?"
"What does that do?" Q's clay-face cucumber-eyes asked.
"It exfoliates your lips and makes them kissably soft," She couldn't help but smile.
"Oooh, yes, please!"
Sometime later, the bathwater was tepid and cloudy, and the champagne was nearly gone.
"I think I'm ready to get out," Kathryn hiccoughed. "Oh my goodness! Excuse me!"
Q only laughed and attempted to help her as she stood up. She clumsily made it over the edge of the tub and grabbed their towels. She handed Q's towel to him as he joined her on the bath mat. They dried off vigorously and wrapped themselves up.
"I need to use the toilet," she told him.
"I'll go get dressed," he leaned down and kissed her thoroughly. "That was fun."
She eventually joined him in the living room dressed in leggings and a cream-colored sweater. Her face was red and her head was a little dizzy.
"I feel like I just went to a spa and a hot tub party all in one," she laughed giddily. "You had more champagne than I did, how do you feel?"
"Wonderful," he purred. "But starving," he pulled her down next to him on the couch.
"Mmm, good thing we're not currently limiting replicator rations," she grinned. "I believe you made that happen."
"I believe you're right! Let's celebrate," he kissed her. "Mmm, let's celebrate again," he kissed her more intensely. "Would you like anything from the replicator?" he whispered in her ear.
"A chicken salad sandwich, please," she giggled.
"Coming right up!" he stood with a flourish and strutted over to the replicator while Kathryn admired the view of his backside. He had put his charcoal pants and royal blue sweater back on, and they definitely looked good on him. He returned with her food and plate for himself with a gigantic hoagie on it. "Bon Appètit!"
They ate in comfortable silence. Kathryn watched in amusement as Q practically inhaled his comically large sandwich. When they were finished, Q whisked the dishes away for recycling and came back to lounge with her on the couch. He crossed one leg over the other and wrapped one arm around her. She leaned her slender form against him and sighed contentedly.
"Are you feeling better?" he murmured into her freshly cleaned and conditioned hair.
"Much," she put her feet up and wrapped an arm around his middle. "Thank you," she squeezed him.
"My pleasure," He rumbled. He was quiet for a moment before adding, "I haven't forgotten your questions about what I'll do when you grow old and die—I was just surprised. When did you start thinking about living the rest of your life with me?" his tone was sly.
"Technically, this morning," Kathryn hedged. "I was just considering…everything. Hypothesizing, really, about the future."
"Really?" Q smirked. "Just to be thorough, of course, yes?"
"Yes," she scowled. "Don't look at me like that. I can think about the future if I want to!"
"Of course, of course you can," Q intoned.
"It doesn't mean anything," she frowned.
"I didn't say it did!" Q chuckled, his expression smug.
"Your face says otherwise," she snapped.
"Does it?"
Kathryn sighed in annoyance.
"Some of us can't travel to the future and see what happens!" she grumbled. "We have to use our imaginations."
"The future is variable, Kathryn. I can predict with some accuracy what the values of those variables are, but the true values can't actually be known until the present."
"What?" her brain stuttered. "What does that mean?"
"It means that even the Q don't know exactly what the future holds. We're just in the best position to make an educated guess," He explained.
"So you don't know for sure what happens here, between us?"
"Nope!" he sighed. "I am aware of the millions of possible outcomes, but I don't know for certain which one will occur in this universe."
"So, if I said 'take us fifty years into the future, Q', you would take us to the currently, most hypothetically probable timeline, but there's a chance that might not be the right one?"
"Correct," he nodded. "But for a Q, fifty years into the future is a relatively easy calculation. I would be almost certainly be correct."
"So you do know how we turn out?" she was exasperated.
"In the next fifty years? I believe so, yes."
Kathryn threw up her hands in frustration.
"So you probably already know what will happen when I grow old and die—why not just tell me? Put me out of my misery!"
"Believe me, I want to!" Q groaned. "But at this point, it would just be speculation!"
"Why, though?" Kathryn stood up and put her hands on her hips. She stared down at him intently.
"I did not want to have this discussion so soon," he gestured towards her placatingly. "I wanted to be in a much more stable place in our relationship…"
"Well, it's too late, unfortunately! We're having this discussion!" Kathryn sat back down on the couch and crossed her arms. She stared at him again, waiting.
"I want you to consider," Q took her hands tenderly in his. "And I don't want you to answer tonight or even any time soon—take your time and truly think about it…"
"Think about what?" she squeezed his hands in encouragement and assurance.
He cleared his throat.
"I want you to consider the idea—the reality, really—that if your partner is a Q, you don't actually have to grow old and die."
Kathryn's eyebrows shot into her hairline.
"What are you saying?" she breathed.
"I'm saying," he said delicately. "That if it were up to me, I would snap my fingers this instant and grant you a life as long as mine-I'm saying we could be together in this universe for as long as you'll have me."
Kathryn sat back against the couch in disbelief, her eyes huge. Q searched her face, then leaned down and kissed the tops of her hands.
"But it's up to you, dearest! Who knows? A couple more weeks with me, and you may be grateful for your mortality, eh?"
Kathryn scowled, still stunned.
"Don't say that," she chided lightly. Q laughed and gave her a peck on the lips.
"Very well," he sighed. "But let's save the rest of this conversation for a later time, shall we? Put it out of your mind for now."
Kathryn nodded mutely.
"All right?" he pulled her to her feet.
"Yes," she confirmed.
"Good. Now, I don't know about you, but I'm still buzzed and suddenly exhausted!" he tugged on her hands, gently leading her to the bedroom. "Come take a quick nap with me and let me hold you for a minute, okay?"
"Okay," she grinned.