JUNJOU TERRORIST
III
CHRISTMAS EVE
Blurring images and deafening sounds was the kitten's world, moving in and out of days he stayed. It took him weeks to regain full consciousness, his system adapting to the burned incense his new masters used, but when he did, he prayed to lose it again cause what he saw was deeply shocking. Pets, of many types and breeds were chained to the walls with iron bars and locks, some others were in small rectangular cages too small for their bodies. He tried to move but his arms were bound, he was even chained by his neck and could barely breath, the collar was roughly cut and honed, easily bruising his skin, it burned and hurt every time he tried to move. How long had he being there? days? weeks? MONTHS? He tried to speak but his voice faded out and was replaced by a gurgle and chocking sound, his roommates looked at him, pain filled and hopeless. How long was he going to stay there? days? weeks? months? YEARS? The fear grew, churning inside his stomach like cold fire, the natural feeling of it scared him the most, like a welcoming sensation of "home", the acrid feeling of acceptance of his own death.
But then, days went by and nothing happened, and even when something did he was barely conscious of it. The gang would drug them first and by the time he woke up, two or three pets would be gone, music would be played somewhere around the house, some screaming and laughing, cries and cheers mixed with metallic voices and booming drums. Then another two or three would return, sometimes the same that were gone before, other times, new ones. What had happened to the other ones? he dared not know. "Ignorance is bliss" he repeated to himself every time their master's voices run through the corridors. But the more he stayed, the more he learned as well. By the end of the 5th event, he knew he was being kept in the basement of an old abandoned house, the gang collected them for clients, not for themselves, he never met them, though.
Cause there were no windows in his room and they only used flash lights he counted time by feedings, the gang fed them 5 times before every party. They were always partying somewhere up and to the left from his room, their hard, loud laughs piercing his ears.
Right now it was almost feeding time, his stomach cramped but he yearned water more than anything, he also hated the feeding time. His body craved for it, but it not only prolonged his misery, but it gave the gang another reason and method to hurt them. David, he learned quickly the name, loved placing their meals just close enough for them to barely touch the plate with their noses, but far enough to not be able to pull it. The torture was unbearable but it was worst when he refused to try, David hated that and tended to throw the food at the wall and hit them with the plate or whatever he had at hand. At least when the torture ended he would move the plate, a few centimeters so the pets could slowly pull their meals close enough to eat.
"Fuck! they're here! THEY'RE HERE, YOU BROUGHT THEM HERE!" the voice outside woke him up from his dark thoughts, looking around he saw lantern lights, flashing in quick circles, "STUPID ASS-WHOLE!" they were still far away from them, fighting with each other, "AND WHAT WAS I SUPPOSE TO DO? LET THEM GET ME?! FUCK YOU AND YOUR STUPID IDEA.." He didn't need to look at his cellar mates, they were all tensing up at the voices.
"SHUT UP! the both of you" their leader barked, his voice coming closer, "and if you don't want to be caught you'll do as I say" their voices died out for a moment, the door broke open and the three entered the room in panic, "set them loose, QUICK! they'll be out of the drugs in a couple minutes, cops will be trying to catch them all first"
"WE GOTTA GO NOW!"
"JUST SET THEM FREE ALREADY!"
"It's done! IT'S DONE" they repeated, he fell to the floor with a dull thump and hard clanks, the metal against the floor, same noises repeating all over the room. "LET'S RUN, THEY'RE HEEEERE!" Just like the gang members said the kitten could hear the loud sirens, he felt cold sweat drenching his ragged shirt, his eyes adjusted quickly, watching the other pets react with the same deeply frighten expression. What was happening? who were "they"? the tension was building up like a tsunami between his cellar mates and it flooded his sensitive mind. Then, there was a sound, a dull sound like static in his ears and after, the house was light up completely. "RUUUUUN!" screamed a voice in his head and something inside him reacted, he moved one leg and then the other, he stumbled and fell over and over again, against a wall, down stairs, breaking doors open, but he kept running until he was out of the house, voices following him, and even farther away, until he was deep in the forest. And then even farther, until he couldn't hear the sirens, or the screaming, or the guns, until his legs could not hold him any longer and he tripped for good, hitting his head against a rock.
When he woke up again, the moon was making its slow journey through the sky, there was no sound, not even the natural buzzing of the city, or the slow rhythm of the wind against the trees, everything was still, like the whole world was holding it's breath. He furrowed his brows, his ears twitched and turned, he blinked long and hard until he was finally able to tell where he was, a soft murmur starting around him. "Mitsuhashi University"he read, in a big rectangular sign, "Professor's parking area" read another sign below and the kitten wrinkled his nose. The words, he could read them, but the meaning behind was foggy and confusing, he felt a tight connection to it, like he had heard it before but his head hurt so badly. He shook it, tried standing up but he was barely able to move three steps until he fell again, there was no moving away.
What could he do? He looked around again, the moon light helped him define the structure's frame. It was a collection of five buildings. Two buildings were tall and close together, one was tall and large curving to form the letter "L", another one was too far away to tell its width but he could tell it was short. And the closest one, small and short, it was the oldest with gray stone and dark wood, with one open window at the first floor.
The kitten looked around again and gulped, he felt his heart racing, his ears straining to hear any sound, but there was nothing. Pulling all his strength he closed his eyes, breathed deep and baring his teeth he moved, dragging half of his body until it touched the building's wall, it felt cold and hard against his bruised body, it felt somehow safe. He followed it like a life line until he reached the window and breathing in again with a trembling hiss, used his claws to push himself up and crawl inside the dark room. "..." with a loud thud he fell to the floor, the pain rippled through his body but he continued on dragging himself until he felt another wall. Turning around he let his back recline against it, his eyes quickly adjusting to the dim light. The office felt so small, the right wall stacked to the roof with books, the two desks in front of him with 4 to 5 columns of piled books, another small shelf to his left bared more books that it could hold. Almost every book had a leather bind, with dark used gold lines and letters, yellowish pages with brown spots sometimes pocking out. The office smelled humid and, "old" he thought, it was a funny smell, it tickled his nose, but the air around was so calm and warm.
Founding a coat in a chair by his side he stretched his arms and pulled it over his shoulders, it took him long minutes but at the end he felt his body slump. The adrenaline leaving his body left him tired, his mind, unable to help itself thought of the past months of his life and could not think of at least one good thing, even the doctor had being just a few days, so short he could only count it as flash happiness, he felt his heart throb with pain and tears. "I should be used by now... I should not cry anymore" his ears dropping, he was about to let his mind drift in to its usual nightmares when the door opened and the lights were turned on.
"where the heck I left that damn coat..." growled a deep baritone voice, "Oh no, the window!" the man entered the room, the door closing fast behind him. In horror the kitten realized he was cornered, but the man had not seeing him yet, maybe if he tried to get closer to the door, but then the man turned and they faced each other.
The kitten gulped hard. The men blinked. The kitten pinned his ears instinctively, his eyes widening. The men in front gulped again. The kitten felt his body frozen with fear, but a second passed, two seconds, three, the kitten thought maybe time had stopped and his body would not move ever again but when the men tried to move forward the kitten screamed and ran as fast as he could passing under the chair and under the left-side desk, until his shoulder hit the wall hard making him cry in pain. Turning, he saw the man moving behind him, bending to see him. He tried to act brave, hissing sounds breaking from his rib-cage but he knew that would not work, the men was tall and he looked too strong for him.
But again, nothing happened, the man bent a couple more times to look at him, trying probably to understand what had happened, he took his cellphone to call animal control, he had never met personally with ferals so he didn't know what to do in this type of situation but then, bending to look closely at the poor kitten he noticed the battered tail and clothes, his skinny body trembling hard against the wall, his sad looking face, the fear in his eyes, even with the state of his clothes he could manage to notice the dark blood stains. He closed his phone and put it inside his pocket.
"Hi, mmm... my name is Miyagi, what's yours?", the kitten looked at him confused but did not respond, trying to pull his legs closer to his chest. Miyagi sighed, he knew he should call the police or at least someone with better knowledge on pets but still, he didn't, sitting on the floor he continue on speaking "I'm a teacher here, my full name is Miyagi Io, you can call me Miyagi, this is a university, I normally don't stay this long but I had to do extra hours" the kitten's brows furrowed, still confused, "This is Mitsuhashi University, it's a good university and I love working here, but sometimes it's so tiring I just want to go on vacations," the men who called himself Miyagi continued on explaining in a low cadence, like the soft murmur of a river, like the sweet rich calling of the wind in a summer's night. "It has being 3 days since I last saw my apartment's bed, don't tell the boss but it's becoming a habit to sleep in my car," Miyagi said, turning his eyes, then, noticing a curious look on the kitten he smiled.
"Either way..." he said taking a cigarette from his breast pocket, he was about to light it when he saw the kitten withdraw in a rush, eyes focused on the cigarette with dark pools of fear. Miyagi didn't light his nicotine stick, he glanced at the naked burned skin of the kitten and felt shame and undeserving yet quite unstoppable guilt "..." without a word he took his cigarette, the box in his breast pocket and the lighter, after showing them to the kitten he tossed them inside a trash can. "It's okay, I can stop smoking for the time being, I think" the kitten was surprised for sure and even though he did not move, his lips twitched towards a small smile. "You must have had a terrible time kit" said Miyagi and scratched his head trying to think of something to do or say when the kittens' tummy rumbled, "Ah... I see, wait here!" he stood up immediately, searching in his discarded briefcase a paper bag, inside, some food. When he turned again two pair of stormy gray eyes were looking curiously at him, drawn by his feline blood with his nose sniffing the air, catching the tasty smell.
"Brat" He thought and then taking the paper bag he walked as slowly as he could, bent and placed the food in-front of him, sitting back down he pushed it with his foot as far away from himself as he could, closer to the kitten. But the kitten only stared at the food wearily, going from the food to Miyagi's face over and over till the older man could only sigh, "I guess you can't help being cautious" he responded to an unvoiced explanation and moved his legs back to stretch as far as he could, grabbing the paper bag and going back to sit down. Again, he made a show of taking the food out and eat a piece of the sandwich, he chewed slowly and swallowed. "It's really good… I would eat more to prove its okay but I'm afraid I didn't left much of my lunch; if I do that, this won't satisfy you...".
Would he eat it? the kitten as if understanding crouched forward and took the bag with his paw, pulling the food towards himself and started eating it's contents slowly. Miyagi watched him eat and felt content, somehow peaceful inside, so he leaned back towards one hopefully sturdy bookshelf and continued on speaking. He talked about the university and his, so awesome classes, about Kamijou, his cute assistant and also, about the school he had come from, his family, apartment, car. Hours passing, the sky outside darkening to pitch black, becoming a light blue, and then reddish, almost pink, clearing and lightening. He was so engrossed on talking that he didn't notice the kitten had come out of under the table and was by his side, when he turned and saw his face so close to him he gasped and would have shouted in surprise if he had not restrained himself in time, it would be no good to startle the kitten when he had gotten him out from under the table.
Looking at the youngster he chuckled again, he was rubbing his eyes sleepily, "I can borrow you my lap if you want" he said patting his thighs with the palm of his hand, and while the kitten was rather confused at first, when he repeated the motion he slowly bend towards him and used his arms to cushion his head and curl over his lap. Miyagi smiled and started petting the kitten's head tenderly, gingerly rubbing his ears, moving along his head, the kitten rubbed his eyes again, sighed and yawned. Miyagi kept moving while his other hand rubbed softly in circular motions to massage his shoulder blades and back. The kitten rubbed his face against Miyagi's lap, yawned again and closed his eyes falling quickly asleep. Miyagi continued on petting him for quite some time, enjoying the soft snoring. He thought about calling animal control in the morning and promised himself he'll do that, but he knew deep down, that was in reality, out of the question.
- 0 -
It was definitely morning, the sun completely up when Miyagi woke up. A certain numbness in his legs caused by a certain weigh on it, caused by a certain little kitten he had tried to help the night before was starting to bother, but the kitten was still asleep, comfortably curled in his lap so he decided to wait a few more minutes. Moving his hand to pet his head again, he chuckled "..." when the door was open suddenly and a short old man entered the room.
"Miyagi-kun?!" the man called surprised at seeing his professor on the floor, still confused Miyagi just mumble "Dean?..." when the kitten, waking up from the conmotion, lifted his face and stared at the old man in-front of them. In response the dean shouted again, "Shinobu?!"
Miyagi knew without a sliver of a doubt the kitten was paralyzed, his eyes never left the man at the door, he could clearly hear the pounding of his heart. It struck him like a train. He NEEDED to protect him, "Dean, do you know him?"
"Know him?! I adopted him months ago!" exclaimed the Dean moving to get a closer look, Miyagi saw the kitten muscles tensing, his ears pinning flat against his skull, his fur standing on end from the top of his ears to the tip of his battered tail, a deep growl lurking menacingly from the bottom of his chest, a threat that was more like a vain attempt to hide his shaking paws. Miyagi instantly turned to see his boss and threw his hands, palms high to stop his movement. The Dean, startled at the kitten's and Miyagi's reaction backed down, lowering his hands "They said he had PTSD, I wanted… I really wanted to help him... he ran away… we searched for so long..." the Dean looked at the kitten sadly, who recognized the expression, too many nights ago at the vet's clinic. While he stopped growling, his ears remained pinned and he hunched away behind Miyagi's back. "how did you find him?"
"I didn't" Miyagi scratched his head and furrowed his brows, he craved badly for a cigarette "he possibly entered through the window, running away from something or someone maybe?, he's in a terribly bad shape" Miyagi looked to the kitten for a second, behind him his golden brows were heavily scowling back, no longer trembling yet not moving away from the protection Miyagi's back gave off.
"We should take him to a hospital" said the Dean worriedly but Miyagi waved his hand in denial, "no good sir, he's not ready, he has suffered way too much, we can't, not right now"
"But what can we do? he doesn't want to go with me, right?" the dean tried to get closer to the kitten again but he tightened his hold on Miyagi's shirt immediately, hissing in warning, the sound was more like a rattlesnake when it was freely leaving the kitten's pale lips "But… what can..." the Dean looked at his Oh so faithful worker, his eyes suddenly showing a light of hope "maybe you could..."
"Oh no, no no no no Sir, I can't" stated Miyagi before the Dean could finished
"Oh come on, it's not that hard and he already trusts you!"
"But my apartment it's too small, and I can barely take care of myself I..."
"But he's just a kitten! It would even do you a greater good to have some company!"
"No sir I can't!" responded Miyagi exasperated, but then he felt the kitten behind him trembling. Biting his lip in remorse he repeated softly "I can't…"
"But if you don't..." It was so low to use it, it was wrong, it was the only thing he could say "animal control will take him away in to the kennels, it is you... or them…" and indeed he saw the realization on Miyagi's eyes, a sequence of memories, painful claws ripping the wounds open. The one he loved, the sweet and bright one, dying in between bars. Miyagi felt his eyes burning, remembering the reason why he did not want to have another pet, ever again. And the Dean knew it was cruel to even hint at it, it might create deeper wounds, knowing how much it meant to him, but still "If I can't... They'll..."
Miyagi looked back at the kit, his knuckles white from clenching at his shirt. Clenching his jaw in anger at his own weakness he growled "Fine, but can I take the day off?, I'm not sure about leaving him alone in my apartment". The Dean sighed with great relief, "I'll inform your assistant myself" The Dean moved back out of the office but stopped at the door and turned "I'm sorry… I really wanted to care for him correctly..."
"I think you did," Miyagi responded with a lopsided smile "you have made me agree"
- 0 -
When the door was closed again Miyagi felt the hard tag in his shirt loosen, looking behind himself he couldn't help chastising his agreement. "What have I done...?" He stood up slowly, helping later the kitten to stand up as well. "You'll come with me" he said pointing at the kitten and then to himself, the kitten looked at him for a second and bent his head slightly to the right, blinking.
"… Brat" Miyagi sighted heavily, "Come" putting on top of the kitten's shoulders his own coat he opened the door. The kitten looked at him, his eyes glistening for an instance before his perfect brows dived in an angry scowl, cheeks turning lightly pink. "THUMP!" Loud Miyagi heard his own heart beat, he swallowed hard and took his briefcase, "Let's leave already, before anyone comes" and before he could register what he was doing, he had extended his hand at the kitten, who not doubting this time took the offer greedily, holding not only to Miyagi's hand but entwining his fingers and hugging his arm as well. "It's the unusual situation, it's unusual, new, situation" Miyagi thought to himself, trying to come up with a reason why he felt so happy with the current events, but the thought gave no reassurance to his mind, "It's like doing to him what I couldn't for her" he tried again, but the thought was not enough, the real reason was far deeper than that, "Fate..." a voice called and his brows twitched, his lips curving in self-deprecation "I'm just sleep deprived and my heart is weak against cruel situations" he stated and ignored as best as he could the burning in his heart. "I just have to separate myself from this, it shouldn't be hard... really, this kit doesn't trust humans, he wouldn't trust an old guy like me..."
But, oh how wrong Miyagi was, for he was not able to separate the kitten from himself, literally. The poor soul trembled fiercely went he tried walking just two feet away from him, his eyes red and black with tears and fatigue. So he ended up walking all around the halls with him, clenching at his side, avoiding human contact, avoiding noise and any type of sudden movements until he finally reached his car and was able to get him in to the passengers seat, putting the seat-belt more like a separation line than a safety method. Still, the kitten hold a corner of his shirt between his small paws, as to make sure he was not going to be left behind, or to disappear any time soon without him.
Miyagi licked his lips for the Nth time that morning, he moved his hand absentmindedly to pull a cigarette and found the pocket empty. "..." . "Let's just end this already..." He tried to drive fast to lower the amount of time inside the car but the kitten freaked out the moment he heard the engine roaring, clawing Miyagi hard at his arm, causing him to scream and hit the brakes, which caused the kitten to scream/cry back and claw him even deeper. Miyagi had to take 10 long minutes to ease the kitten back to his seat and check his wounds, they were not deep enough to warrant stitches he thought/hoped, but they still burned, "Oh well, I'll have to disinfect them later" he sighed, but turning to the kitten he slowly moved his hand on top of the golden fur to pet him. It would be no good if the kitten got depressed about it, or freaked out again.
"I'm sorry, there's no reason to worry about it, we'll get home soon" he said and started driving again a lot slower, taking only the road sides and long silent streets. On his side the kitten felt his heart throb, his cheeks warming softly. Being petted was wonderful, Miyagi's large hand moved back and forth roughly, like combing his golden main but his fingers caressed his round perky ears so delicately, it made his chest fill with an strange emotion, a low purr brewing. The kitten smiled back and sat still, his back straight against the seat, ears quickly turning at the sight from the window. The rarely passing cars, the people, streets and large buildings amazed yet frightened the kitten. Maybe… maybe if he could stay with this person, he could look at the buildings finally with wonder.
-0-
After the amazing, in a way, scene at the car, the arriving home worried Miyagi to no end, but he was lucky there was no one around in the lobby, in the elevator or even in the corridors. Probably because of the time, too early for employees to come back and too late for children and mothers to be out to school. Pulling the kitten towards himself Miyagi unlocked his door and entered his apartment. But then Miyagi stopped walking, feeling a gentle pull at his arm. The kitten was trying to look farther away without breaking the hold on Miyagi's hand. Miyagi tried to pry his claws from his sleeve but the kitten instantly grabbed his hand tighter and moved closer to him. Miyagi could only smiled. "Brat"
Walking to his living room he placed the kitten in the sofa and after many attempts he was finally able to separate him, it was unbelievable the tight grip the kitten had, being so small and skinny, also being pretty much wounded. "Stay" he ordered and the kitten scowled back, thankfully he stayed put, following Miyagi only with his eyes. Quickly Miyagi moved in to the kitchen, first thing first, he had to feed the starving feline, but walking around the kitchen he couldn't find what to cook or how to do it. When was the last time he had done ANYTHING in the kitchen? Apart from heating things up on the microwave or putting coffee in the coffee maker. "Juice! That's always healthy!" he thought, rapidly taking a lonely can of chopped papaya and bananas, but the moment he tried to use the blender the kitten jumped in fright, 5 feet in the air landing on his paws behind the sofa, his tail all puffed up and his ears pinned, again the snake like hissing rumbling out. Miyagi could not decide whether to laugh at the cuteness or be angry at his own stupidity. Again, like with the cigarettes he showed the kitten the evil artifact and threw it far away inside one high shelf.
But this was just another proof of how unprepared he was for the unexpected visit, Miyagi scratched his head, not able to cook anymore, he worried about the kitten. "Just wait a minute" he said pointing one finger upward and started a tour around the house. The kitten looked curiously at him. He walked down the hall to the right, in to his bedroom, collecting every hard, sharp, possibly dangerous or to noisy equipment he had. Scissors, knifes, alarm clocks, radios, nibs pens, screwdrivers, everything found a place in his bedroom closet, the bathroom lower cabinet, the laundry cabinet or the kitchens high shelves. And every place was secured and locked. Miyagi also closed the balcony, he was about to lock the main door but something stopped him, looking back at the kitten he saw again the fear, his tail swishing in quick whips behind the sofa, "I think I'm done" he stated out loud, returning instantly to the kitchen and to his inevitable cooking.
After three hours of battling Miyagi declared it finished. He was not very good at… anything house related but he could at least do something edible, burned sticky rice, chopped cabbage and tomatoes, grilled pieces of fish, pork and chicken, he found still good in his freezer and a glass of really thick and lumpy juice. Miyagi scratched his head still doubting the results, he looked back at the kitten, who was sitting in the sofa again, chest resting against the sofa's back support intently glaring at what Miyagi was doing, his nose sniffing from time to time. "Ah..." he was about to say something when a loud growl was heard from inside the kitten's stomach and Miyagi chuckled. "Fine" Without ceremony he served it in two plates and placed them in the table in-front of the kitten "Eat, it's not much but after what you have being through it might not be good to eat a lot either way"
"Either way… Itadakimasu"*
The kit sniffed the food and felt his mouth water, Miyagi's words were to low and mumbled that he could barely get any meaning from them but looking the way he was eating he decided to give it a try. Slowly he climbed down from the sofa and sat on the floor, he sniffed the food again and stock his tongue out, he felt a lightly bitter flavor at first but then he felt the salt and prickly taste of the pork meat, "Delicious" he thought taking one piece of pork in his mouth and munching it happily. After that one bite the kitten almost wolfed down the food. Miyagi smiled sadly at the desperation he saw in the kitten, "Brat, eat slowly or you'll choke" he growled and continue on eating, the kitten smiled back. THUMP. "Is just the lack of sleep, I'm tired..."
"Yowwwll" With his stomach full and satisfied the kitten yawned and rubbed his eyes, the emosions of the day taking finally it's toll on the kitten's body. "Are you tired already?" Miyagi asked noticing the heavy eyelids, the kitten yawned back in response making Miyagi chuckle, "go to sleep then, I'll be here when you wake up" Miyagi said standing up with the plates in his hand and walking with them in to the kitchen. But when he came back the kitten was curled in the floor in a tight ball, his knees close to his chest and his thin tail on top of his legs to provide a useless protection against the cold. Miyagi sighted, "Hey brat..." he started moving his hand to pet the kitten's fur when something silvery caught his eyes, it was a name tag, attached to a large and heavy collar. The kitten's fur was so thick and long it had covered it completely. It was only when he moved the fur while petting than the thing was in sight. It had a name inscribed as expected, "Shinobu" it said and Miyagi remembered the name the Dean had used "Mmm... Shinobu?" he tried calling and Shinobu's ears perked even thought he was so sleepy, his tail undulating in broad circles, that had to be positive.
"Should I let you sleep in my lap again Shinobu-chin?" he asked, sitting by his side at the floor and patting his lap. The kitten didn't need anymore encouragement this time, crawling slowly to place his head over his lap and let it fall. He shivered once and curled in to a tight ball against Miyagi's warm body, cuddling and snuggling his face against the man's legs. Miyagi felt his cheeks reddening but he ignored the feeling, placing his hand on Shinobu's head to pet him, making the little kit purr contently.
It was late in to the night when Miyagi woke up, Shinobu was still asleep so he stood up slowly, trying as hard as he could not to wake him up. He patted his trousers clean but straightening he looked at Shinobu on the floor, so curled up to maintain his warmth, a heavy feeling sat the pit of his stomach. "..." Sighting Miyagi moved quickly in to his bedroom and laundry taking many old towels and bed-sheets, among other things. When Shinobu woke up he was curled up in a large cushion and wrapped with many bed sheets and bedspreads, Shinobu had being so tired he didn't notice when Miyagi had carry him on it and tucked him. He felt his cheeks redden. Checking his new made bed Shinobu clawed and scratched, pulling and pushing it to his heart's content. Shinobu purred falling asleep again.
NOTE: Itadakimasu is used to thank for the food before eating, it can mean something alone the lines of "Thanks for the food" "Let's eat" or "I'm gonna eat"
Author's note: This had a lot of changes, not only to the passing and structure but to the time line, I hope this version is better thou I worry it might not be as good cause it's 2:12 am and it's a very heavy chapter.
