Title: colour my spine, I'm giving you my all
Fandom: Hyouka
Genre: Slice-of-life, Friendship, Romance, Angst and Hurt & Comfort
Chapters: 1/?
Word count: 2.6k
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Notes 1: Please read the Hyouka novel one-shot chapters 'the long holiday' and 'the mirror that can't reflect' for context.
Notes 2: The tea shop/café mentioned in i is the same one Houtarou and Irisu frequented on ep 10-11.
This detail isn't important, I just found it super hilarious and wanted to share! For some reason, I was very interested in the price of the tea-set Houtarou chose. So, I looked it up. The manga tells me that Houtarou freaked out when ordering and picked the first thing his eyes landed on in a blind panic. He's never been to such a fancy place; I don't blame him, I'd do the same, but — hehehe — his yunnan tea also happened to be the most expensive set on the menu. Man, can you imagine having the guts to confront someone and then being intimidated by the rich people atmosphere?
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colour my spine, I'm giving you my all
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part one
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i
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"We're already on the way so we may as well brighten up and enjoy the day!" This is the statement that Satoshi makes into the morning air.
From the extra bounce in his step, it's easy to see who's leading who down the street. While Houtarou is as grey as the clouds that have eaten the early sun, Satoshi isn't bothered by the late March slush.
However, this is beyond Satoshi Fukube's usual behaviour. Though he enjoys laughing at cheap slapstick gags on TV, and lives by his motto of jokes and shocking pink, this is the kind of weather that encourages hiding — which Houtarou displays by groaning out a reply.
Satoshi doesn't take the unenthusiastic demeanour to heart. Judging by Houtarou's hands — stuffed deep into the pockets of his white trench coat — and the slight shivering, his body language says it all, telling Satoshi that the only thing the taller boy resents is the biting chill.
Houtarou doesn't mean anything ill and is an open book. Satoshi can practically read the thoughts running through his friend's head: that it is far too cold for anyone to be chipper (especially this chipper).
Marching forward, he pats his friend on the back and encouragingly says, "You'll like her, Houtarou!"
Satoshi's voice rings loud and clear, his words tossed into the world and said so carelessly over his shoulder that it almost sounds haphazard and staged. Actually, no. Perhaps not 'staged' per se. There is definitely something genuine about his promise. This is not another one of his jokes.
"Of all the places to meet, does it have to be at Café Hifumi?" Houtarou asks. He makes it clear among his many preferences, like the kotatsu calling Houtarou's name back to the Oreki residence, that this isn't it.
Satoshi can understand why. The tea house is not a place many people can afford. Despite this, he asks, "I thought you liked tea?"
"I do," Houtarou frowns at this riddle. "But, we could have met at the arcade."
"And do what? Chat over a few games of Virtual On? Do you want to spend the first day of Spring break hunched over that dusty, old robot battle simulator?"
Houtarou sinks the lower part of his face into his scarf, showing that he is more than a little perplexed as to why so much effort is being made for some mysterious girl. The only piece of information that Satoshi has provided is that this girl studied at Inji Middle School. Satoshi is intentionally keeping Houtarou in the dark. He wants this to be a fun surprise!
But, Satoshi appreciates Houtarou's efforts and lets his friend sulk a little as their sneakers trudge along.
"I'm not saying she is better than the arcade, I'm just saying she's special and deserves niceness." Satoshi claims.
Houtarou says nothing to Satoshi's remark. Instead, he salutes his ten-day streak of doing nothing good-bye.
"This is not how I imagine I'd spend my holiday." Houtarou utters. Perhaps wishing to celebrate his middle school graduation in complete idleness is asking for too much?
"Live a little, we're about to be high schoolers!" Satoshi exclaims. (Even if he agrees that their mini-vacation will pass in a blink of an eye.) Not wanting to lose momentum, Satoshi skillfully switches the conversation and asks, "Are you worried about first impressions?"
"Nope."
"What about the infamous overpriced tea-sets then?" Satoshi asks, adding some flair to their conversation.
Houtarou lets out a displeased harrumph. "Yup, you could say that. I can already feel my wallet weighing as light as a feather."
Satoshi gets a chuckle in reply before he points and excitedly exclaims, "We're almost there! Do you see the sign, Houtarou? Because I do!"
At a distance, a grand red curtain with 'Hifumi' embossed in lettering enters their peripheral vision.
Houtarou nods, though he doesn't expand his energy beyond that, walking leisurely to the building's promise of warmth.
Just before they enter the café, Satoshi turns to look at Houtarou one more time. The usual smile that sticks to Satoshi's face is wider, stretched into an ear-to-ear grin, and he says, "I guarantee that you'll think she's great, Houtarou! She really is special!"
Houtarou's usual blank expression flutters. It's typical for Satoshi to answer in a non-straightforward fashion and to even add a laugh in return to a question, but he doesn't add melodrama for no reason.
The tall boy doesn't question the claim, however, he does say, "You shouldn't throw around that word so casually."
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Of course, Satoshi does not listen. He lives in his fantasies, soaking in the moment.
This vibrant coloured vision continues as a tea house staff leads the two boys down a hallway of boxed-in cubicles decorated with tall potted plants and tatami mats. Despite the warmth of the building and the Winter chill fading, Satoshi shivers. The mature atmosphere only heightens Satoshi's delirium; the electric lanterns above their heads shine, and the many rich fragrances that hit Satoshi's nose make his head spin.
Soon, she comes into view.
Satoshi has the mind to call out her name and give a little wave to get her attention — but the opportunity is snatched away by someone he least expects.
And that person is Houtarou Oreki.
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"Ibara?"
There's this moment of realisation.
"… Oreki." Mayaka Ibara's face twists into an expression that Satoshi doesn't think he's ever seen Mayaka make. "It's really you."
"Hmm, it's been a while," Houtarou replies. "Three years,"
Satoshi is surprised that Houtarou bothered to keep count.
"Three years." Mayaka agrees in a tone that tells the room 'What else is there to say?' and then pausing to look at Satoshi — just barely though — before glancing back over at Houtarou.
Satoshi's eyes follow, staring at the now sullen boy as well, equally as mute and unsure of what will happen next.
A joke mounts on his tongue, ready to distract the group when a ghost of a smile suddenly appears on Houtarou's face.
"Well," Houtarou finally speaks, breaking the silence. "I've hardly missed you."
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ii
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"Houtarou, how do you know Mayaka?"
Perhaps Satoshi shouldn't have asked such a question. Earlier, he wasn't even sure if the two would get to their destination, here at the IBARA BOOK HOUSE. Satoshi doesn't think Houtarou will kick up a fuss and leave (probably due to his energy-conserving motto) but something like enmity had stirred in the depths of Houtarou's heart during the unlikely reunion. Houtarou came off as rude to Mayaka.
Well … most people assume Houtarou as such. Houtarou's short responses, lack of attempts to do much of anything and his refusal to put in effort steers a lot of folks away. Satoshi had always thought of Houtarou as apathetic, but now … he's not so sure. There was heat behind his words.
Currently, Houtarou is back to his usual calm self but Satoshi is still curious. He can't understand why Houtarou is willingly coming along to meet Mayaka and her friends after he said what he said. It's not like Satoshi sprung the sudden news on Houtarou out of thin air, and Satoshi being the middleman doesn't seem to be enough reason nor motive.
What's going on in his friend's head? Satoshi wants to know. Houtarou isn't a big talker, but he hasn't been anywhere aside from Satoshi's side since day one of middle school. They rarely detached from each other. Surely, Houtarou's willing to share?
"Ibara and I go way back," Houtarou answers in his usual monotone voice. "I met her in first grade. We shared classes for the whole of elementary school, her presence was unavoidable."
"Ah," Satoshi says, but it's more of an automatic sound than a reply. "You say it like it's a bad thing,"
Houtarou picks up a pen and absent-mindedly stares at the lava-lamp design built into its cap. "For six years straight, we saw each other every weekday, sometimes on weekends as well."
"Did you guys talk every day, too?"
Houtarou shakes his head. "No, not really. We could have, but … we didn't and …" He blinks, his green eyes cloudy with something. "I don't know. One day, I just didn't see her anymore. I suppose the last time I saw her, it was at graduation years ago."
"Wow," Satoshi utters. "Fate is a funny thing, huh? You guys really could have left it all behind in elementary school."
Houtarou contemplates on this, "I suppose," Then he asks, "Why are you asking? For your data?"
The question could have easily been ignored. Satoshi could have pretended to be absorbed in something else, like the pencil case he's randomly decided to pick up. Or, he could have played off the conversation with a joke or inserted a random tidbit that he found interesting.
But Satoshi chooses to answer, even if it's ambiguous. "Maybe."
Satoshi laughs. Houtarou does not.
Then he asks, "Was Mayaka different back then? Back when you two were kids?"
Houtarou quirks a brow as if to tell his friend 'it's impossible for me to say after one interaction', but then he stops to think. His lips part to give a half-hearted answer, "She's …"
Satoshi never takes his attention off the random English words slapped on the pencil case's design, but his ears perk up.
"Ibara is …"
Satoshi leans in; eager, hungry.
"Ibara —"
Houtarou never gets to finish his words. Because, just then, as if he had summoned her, the bookstore's bell chimes and Mayaka walks in.
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Houtarou had fled.
Or, perhaps, 'fled' is the wrong word to put it. Houtarou said he wanted to look for lead for his mechanical pencil before excusing himself to a corner of the shop.
Satoshi stared awkwardly at Houtarou's retreating back until Mayaka interrupted by introducing him to a polite-looking girl with braided hair and small glasses. 'Juu-chan' is well-spoken and has an interesting diction. They easily bounce off each other until she says her full name — Kaho Juumonji — and that's when Satoshi gasps.
"You don't mean the Juumonji from the Arekusu Shrine, do you?!"
Juumonji tilts her head and lets out a laugh. "I am."
Satoshi sends a smile to both Mayaka and Juumonji's way. "What about your other friend?"
"Oh, Chii-chan can't make it today," Mayaka replies, looking apologetic. "It was last minute. If I had known sooner, we could have rescheduled so that we could all hang out together."
"Aw, that's unfortunate." Satoshi laments. (Though, he can't help but wonder if Mayaka suggested bringing friends along to repeal the odd air between her and Houtarou.) "Did something happen to her?"
Mayaka tips her head, studying Satoshi like a novel she could leaf through. "No, Chii-chan's been busy settling an important matter. It's personal so I can't tell you what it is, it's not my place to say, but this is the second time she's cancelled to meet up. "
Satoshi nods in understanding. "Maybe all five of us could meet up another time?"
"Five? You brought a friend with you as well, Fukube-kun?" Juumonji asks.
"Oh yeah, Houtarou! Erm," Satoshi glances at Mayaka whose expression doesn't look bothered or uncomfortable at the mention. "He's not the type to get lost or easily distracted, but we should probably go look for him."
Juumonji nods. "Alrighty, let's go then!"
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Despite Satoshi's hesitance in how the day would turn out, it went relatively well; with Houtarou being purposely asocial while the girls maintained a friendly air. Talking to Mayaka is a walk in the park as it had been the first day they met. Talking to Juumonji … not so much. There is some struggle to find common ground and fumbling in making small talk, but more preferable to whatever Houtarou and Mayaka have going on.
(Satoshi thinks those two have intentionally either stood or sat as far away as possible from one another during the entirety of their hangout. It's not a topic that can be brought up now. But their odd dynamic and history are something Satoshi wants to swing back to later.)
"It's sad that we weren't able to meet your other friend today. I don't suppose that we could plan something before the new semester starts?" Satoshi asks before they waved good-bye to each other.
"I'm not sure. Chii-chan has been really busy. But maybe we can still hang out after classes?" Mayaka suggests.
Satoshi brightens. "We could! Which high schools did you guys enrol into?"
"Eru and I chose Kamiyama High." Juumonji answers.
Satoshi's brown eyes go wide. He doesn't even realise his attention is drifting towards Mayaka until his vision is only her.
"Kamiyama High as well,"
"What?! All of you?!" Satoshi exclaims. Mayaka doesn't answer further, too busy being flushed red when she notes Houtarou silently raising a brow at her. Satoshi ignores it too, opting to joke, "Did you girls make a pack or something?"
"You could say that," Juumonji replies with a playful smile. "What about you two?"
"Houtarou and I picked Kamiyama, too!" Satoshi says, answering for his friend.
"You did?" Mayaka turns to gap at the tall boy.
To this, Houtarou finally speaks. "My Aneki went there, so it's a convenient decision for me."
"You just refused to think of another opinion?"
"Pretty much. It's a lot of effort to enrol into another school."
"That's Houtarou Oreki for you," Satoshi jokes.
There's a pause before Mayaka says to Houtarou, "Do you think we'll be in the same class again?" It's a genuine question by the tone of her voice.
Houtarou shrugs. "Maybe."
The reply is casual but Satoshi doesn't think his friend could stand the idea of sitting next to each other.
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iii
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Houtarou and Mayaka do not end up in the same class. Not that Satoshi counted on it, he's no fool when it comes to statistics and facts. The winning streak of six years had been defeated and turned to dust long ago; the moment Houtarou and Mayaka enrolled into different middle schools.
Out of the five of them, Satoshi and Juumonji do land themselves as classmates. Satoshi chalks this up to the likelihood of chance.
But, by the way Juumonji reacted to Satoshi sitting two tables away from her, it made him want to eat his words. Juumonji didn't seem all that surprised by their fate. In fact, she seemed very pleased.
"Hi, Fukube-kun."
"Hi, Juumonji-san." Satoshi tells her, smiling just as politely.
He doesn't know why she'd be so ecstatic though, they barely connected during their outings, mostly just observing Houtarou and Mayaka. Maybe Juumonji is simply relieved to see a familiar face? Maybe she's just friendly today?
"I was thinking of looking for Eru later. You said you wanted to meet her, didn't you?" Juumonji says.
"Eru …?" Satoshi repeats, confused.
" 'Chii-chan'," Juumonji utters Mayaka's nickname, then says, "Eru Chitanda,"
"Of the Chitanda farmlands?!"
"Yeah," Juumonji nods. "She says we can meet in the Geography room on the fourth floor of the Specialised Subjects Block building."
This piques Satoshi's interest, but he says, "I have to meet Houtarou after classes, he told me this morning that he received a letter from his sister," There's a pause. His usual cheerful front resumes a beat after. "I do want to meet Chitanda-san though. I'll try my best to meet you in the Geography room,"
"Okie dokie. Don't rush."
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(But somebody else finds her first.)
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When the two 1-D students eventually reach the Geography room, Chitanda is standing by a Spring sun stained window, locked in a gaze with Houtarou Oreki. His hand is limply holding onto a paperback, his back ramrod straight and his features look as if Cupid has struck an arrow through the boy's heart.
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Notes 3: I haven't published any Hyouka since August 2021 due to my postgrad studies. I've been dropping hints about this fic in the notes of my other one-shots for a while now. Years, actually. Some of you may have noticed that I've made inconsistencies of flip-flopping between saying this fic is a love pentagon and/or love hexagon. Originally, I intended for this to be between the Classics Club and Kaho Juumonji (five people/love pentagon), but then I played around with the idea of adding Asami Toba — because why not? — so a love hexagon (six people) but I still haven't fully decided. I'll figure it out when I figure it out.
The set-up for this story is (1) an AU where the Kaburaya trio never happened and (2) the result of this divergence. Forget everything you know about the trio's dynamic and Satoshi/Mayaka because the Valentine's Day confession that took place in middle school never happened and therefore Satoshi's vow to not be obsessed with Mayaka is non-existent.
He gets to obsess over her now and he has reasons to do so because I'm going to slightly edit Mayaka's backstory and hype her up. However, Satoshi is mostly the same: determined to be a database and determined to prove himself. I have a feeling that his self-doubt manifested during his childhood years so it's very much deep-rooted and (not gonna lie) a bit of a problem … 👉 👈
Also, this fic explores aspects of Satoshi's issues and his thoughts on expectation — specifically his view of the upper-class and his visible disappointments of reality. It's not something new. It's very much a pattern of his. Satoshi has shown his colours when addressing the Exponential Four Clans, Irisu (and maybe Toogaito, idk).
When Satoshi discovered that Chitanda didn't have a butler to greet them at the front door of the Chitanda estate, it caught my attention. To place that much anticipation and pressure on someone's lifestyle because they're wealthy and come from a 'well-known' household is … not something I encourage.
Canon!Satoshi already thinks he's not good enough for Mayaka. To put Mayaka in the same big shoes as Chitanda would only mean that Satoshi is going to feel twice-fold as unworthy to be with her.
In short, I'm writing about wealthy cliques, melodrama, the suffering of young love and angst.
Notes 4: Anyways, Bar school and my Master of Laws course are pretty much consuming all of my time and energy! I'm barely surviving so I dunno when I'll update.
— 7 April 2023