TRIGGER WARNING. Depictions of physical abuse and sexual assault.
White's strategy had worked. She didn't rebuff Magnetar's affection and he gave her more freedom to wander the ship. "I want to see familiar things to spark memories of our time together," she had told Magnetar with a bat of her eyes. Of course, the ever-observant Inconel was there to shadow her every move, but White could work around him. All she needed was more memories of the mysterious Pearl from her past. The more information she could gather, the better chance she had of putting an end to the Alloy's conquering of her Gems.
"Anything?" Inconel quizzed White about her memories. He had repeated the same single worded question too many times for her to count. She had yet to stop fantasizing about pushing him out the nearest air lock.
"Still nothing," she answered through her teeth with a sickeningly sweet inflection. The Alloys were beyond any form of subtlety. The only one she had to focus on fooling was Magnetar. "Do the Alloy's have a home world, or other single location to call home?" she grilled him.
"We have no need for an organic world to utilize as a focal point of our society. This ship is the center of the Alloy Fleet. We only need stars to power our technology and ourselves."
White knocked on a seam in the wall, testing it's strength, "You boys sure don't like Organic worlds. Almost like you're…scared of them?"
"Organic worlds and their inhabitants are irrelevant," Inconel said.
'But perhaps dangerous for you as well,' she thought to herself, eyeing the bits of tarnish under Inconel's scales that were starting to rust.
White heard a giggle.
She searched the floor vigorously. Along another wall seam, White saw, no, she remembered the Pearl. She saw herself knelt down over the small Gem, who was the source of the mischievous chuckle.
"I'll meet you back in the room," the Pearl whispered, and then slid a small piece of wall away, that opened to a tiny passage. She slipped through and vanished into the darkness.
The memory faded, and White stared at the same seam in the wall. 'There are secret passageways throughout the ship,' she realized with a victorious smile. That was how her past self was able to hide the Pearl from Magnetar.
"You remembered something, didn't you?" Inconel probed.
"I'm tired. I want to go back to my room," was all she rewarded him in answer.
Inconel didn't argue. He escorted her back to her white empty room. "I'll be outside if you need anything," Inconel assured her, though it was far to cold to mean much. The door closed between them, and White released a sigh she had been holding for countless hours. It was the only respite time she allowed herself.
White got on her hands and knees to search the walls and floors. She slid her hand over the smooth metal surface in hopes of finding an invisible seam. She was willing to bet, any secret passageways her past self and the Pearl had made, would lead back to her room.
One of her nail's caught under a bump, and she smiled triumphantly when it slid open. The small door was just about the size of her hand. Her feelings of achievement waned fast as she studied the minuscule opening. Shifting her physical form smaller for the Warp Pad to Steven's house was a breeze compared to this challenge.
"My past self was able to do it!" she said with resolve. The door was big enough for her Gem to fit, and that was all she would need. She took a deep breath, and concentrated. She forced herself to shrink. Her light form bulked at the challenge, and it almost made her woozy to push everything inward. She could only imagine how ridiculous she looked, small arms and legs that stumbled off balance under the weight of her Gem.
She pushed through the door in the wall, and was relieved to see after a short, hand carved tunnel, she arrived in a bigger room that would accommodate half of her normal size at least. White reverted back to half her size with a groan. "Spinel would have found that ordeal hilarious," she mused. Her shrinking trial was forgotten when she took in the multicolored room she had discovered.
She had been entrenched in the Alloy ship's dull black and gray hull and her textureless white room for so long, seeing so many colors was disorienting.
Depictions of worlds, cut gemstones, and star systems decorated the walls, ceiling, and floor. The colors were made with an organic bases and were painted with a careful hand.
She remembered painting them.
She would sneak away from the Alloy ship to the surface of worlds and would return before she was missed. She recorded all she could, so she could remember it. On the floor, painting small little organic beings was the Pearl. White could almost hear the Pearl laugh in amusement. The Pearl's wide eyes gazed up from her work to take in White above her. Her face was loving. It was not the look of a servant, belonging to a greater lifeform. They were friends, and equals.
"It's beautiful, Starlight," White had praised the Pearl with a grin.
"Starlight," White whispered. The affectionate name she gave to Pink, had been the name of her first Gem creation. Her Pearl, Starlight.
Then she heard her own voice, shaken with sobs. White turned to the other corner, and she remembered herself.
Curled on the floor, her arms wrapped around herself. Standing on her shoulder, wiping away her tears was the Pearl, Starlight. "He didn't mean it," White had whimpered.
Starlight dabbed at White's tears with the edge of her dress, "But White…he hurt you."
White sniffed, "Magnetar loves me, Starlight. It's not his fault he treats me bad. I made him mad. I know better than to do that."
Starlight shook her head, "There is nothing you could do that would justify him hurting you," she said sternly.
White cried into her hands, "It used to be so perfect… Why did it turn into this? Most days I just want to forget the pain."
"There… may be a way to forget," Starlight offered.
The footsteps snapped White back to the present. She wiped her tears from her eyes and scrambled back to the door. She forced herself to shift small once more and hurried to the other side, returning to her normal size and closing the secret passageway before the door to her room slid open.
It was Magnetar.
They stared at each other, his normally hard face tinged with worry, "Love, you're shaking. What's wrong?"
"I want my Pearl back," She stated, and rose to her feet.
Magnetar huffed, "Oh, sweet White, what am I going to do with you?"
"She's mine," White specified slowly. Her carefully crafted mask of obedience was cracking under the weight of her growing anger, "You had no right to take her from me, and you have no right to keep her."
"Even without her being here, that little Pearl is corrupting your perfect mind," he said with a sad sigh.
White scoffed, "Oh please. Was your ego so fragile you were threatened by a Pearl scurrying around your ship?"
"You just came from your secret tunnels, I see. I wondered when you would remember those," Magnetar mused.
White clenched her jaw and pretended not to be surprised. He was still one step ahead. Magnetar glanced past her at the wall seam where she had just come from, and then he shook his head. "I knew everything, but like I said, I chose to ignore it. I didn't understand why you obsessed over the little organic grown Gem but it made you happy. But then, that creation of yours crossed the line. That's why I took her away."
White bumped him as she walked towards the window. The void of space was more appealing then seeing him. She snarled over her shoulder, "And what golden rule of the mighty Magnetar did my Pearl manage to break? It must have been miniscule-"
White jerked to a stop, her gasp choking her words. Magnetar had snatched her by the arm and yanked her back to face him. His calm demeanor had fled the room. A glare had taken over his features. "She had convinced you to leave me. That was the line she crossed," he hissed, acid coating every syllable. White pulled at her arm to break free, and he pulled her harder towards him.
Panic rose in her chest, but she smothered it with anger, "Let me go, Magnetar!"
He snatched her face with his free hand, squeezing her cheeks between his fingers to keep her focus on him, "Over many years, that Pearl of yours stole pieces of technology and parts from the ship, so small and spread out even I didn't understand what she was doing for a time. But then I saw her true intentions. You had both utilized those ship parts to build a rudimentary Warping device, powerful enough to leave my ship, and travel out of my reach. That wasn't enough for that little Pearl. Together, you both created a device, a 'Rejuvenator' you called it, that would allow you to forget me and start anew wherever you ended up. That was unforgivable. She had no right to convince you to leave. She had no right to erase me from your life!"
White stared at him in utter shock. The person responsible for her memory loss, was herself?
Magnetar shoved White backwards. She stumbled but remained on her feet. Her intention was to flee, but he lifted the scale under his neck, the scale he claimed to hide her Pearl, Starlight. White wasn't sure what she expected. Her Pearl, incased in some Alloy technology to keep her from reforming, or maybe even a metallic bubble. It was neither.
Glistening shards greeted her, contained in a simple transparent capsule. He had shattered her Pearl, and at that moment, White remembered everything and her past came flooding back.
"Magnetar is gone on a mission. He wanted to see their Black Hole experimentation in person," White promised Starlight as she crawled into their hidden safehouse behind her room's wall. "We have a few hours."
Her little friend smiled up at her. Despite the fear that threatened to choke White, she was comforted by Starlight's confidence, "We'll be long gone by then," she said.
White's stomach jumped, but she managed a grin. "Is it done?" she whispered, despite them being the only two in their hide out.
"It's finally big enough," Starlight confirmed, and gave the Rejuvenator on the makeshift worktable a pat. It was three times larger than Starlight, but it had to be to work on White. If it wasn't powerful enough to poof her physical form, then it couldn't reset her Gem and memories.
Starlight struggled to pick it up, so White helped her. Starlight blushed, "best if you hold onto it, I guess."
White examined the device as it sat silent in her hands, "I never thought this day would come… I've fantasized about it for so long, but now that I'm here, I don't know…" she trailed off.
"It's scary," Starlight confirmed with a nod. White noticed for the first time; Starlight seemed hesitant. "We can't look back, but the rejuvenator will make us forget each other. That's what I'm scared of."
White put down the device and held out a hand before Starlight. An invitation for her to jump into her palm. Starlight did so without thinking twice. "We'll make new memories together," White promised. "Even when we forget, we'll be together. But, before we do, I want you to know, I never would have found the courage to survive this nightmare without you. I would never have known I needed to escape. You saved me."
Starlight stood on her toes and kissed White's cheek. "I'd do it all over again." She promised. She jumped down to the floor and spun to twirl her dress as she often did when excited. "Alright! Our mission begins now. Let's go over the plan one more time! Step one: Get to the Warp hidden on the belly of the ship. Step two: Warp to the farthest location it will take us. Step three: Destroy the warp and forever sever ourselves from the Alloys. Step four: Use the rejuvenator on ourselves…"
White placed a gentle finger under Starlight's chin and shared an excited grin. "Step five: Be happy." She said.
Starlight blushed, and with a determined nod she rushed for the door, "What are we waiting for then?" she vanished through the opening. White folded the rejuvenator and stored it away in her Gem before shifting smaller to follow Starlight.
She crawled out into her room, shifted back to normal. She threw open the door to her room and was face to face with Magnetar.
White stumbled back and pressed hard into the wall. Her excitement was gone, leaving room for simple, unadulterated fear. Her voice had fled, and she could only stair wide eyed at the Alloy leader who observed her with disappointment. He wasn't angry, yet, but she knew that was coming. When she spotted Starlight squirming in his hand, White finally found her voice.
"I can explain," White whispered.
Magnetar held up a hand to silence her. He pinched the bridge of his nose with his free hand, as if even he was warding off his building rage. White pressed harder into the wall. "White, my love. We've talked about this many times. You know I hate repeating myself."
"I know," White whimpered. "And I'm sorry. But please. Starlight, that Gem. I swear, she's the only one I made."
"I know that," Magnetar assured her, turning Starlight in his fingers. "White, my love, I've known about her for a while now. You don't think I would have noticed the difference in you? You can't create followers like I can without weakening yourself."
"She's the only one I'll ever make, I swear. Please, give her back." White said, her hands held out and trembling.
"One was enough to convince you to leave me," Magnetar stated flatly.
It was like White's Gem had dropped into her shoes and shattered on the metal floor. How could he have known? She had been so carful, Starlight so quick on her feet to remain unseen. They never spoke their plans in front of other Alloys, Magnetar's eyes and ears. "Nothing in this ship is a secret from me," Magnetar promised her.
White winced when his grip tightened on Starlight and she yelped. Starlight was silent, but her eyes were pleading. "I wasn't going to leave," White lied. "I love you Magnetar. Please, please just give her back." He looked down at Starlight, and his fingers loosened. Starlight sat tense in his palm, but he didn't move to surrender the Gem to White.
White took a cautious step forward, tears wetting her cheeks. "I'll do anything," she begged. "I'll never leave your side. When you leave for missions you can lock me in your quarters. Just let me have her back."
"I love you, White. I wish you hadn't put me in this situation," Magnetar huffed. The room fell silent. Outside, the hungry Black Hole Magnetar hoped to utilize for power swirled, a black void at it's center, it's event horizon a halo of red light particles. Time didn't exist here, so close to oblivion. The point where the Universe had torn a hole in space time to cannibalize itself. The Black Hole paled in comparison to the void of a man White was pleading with.
"New step five," Starlight spoke. Her voice crashed reality back before White. Starlight offered a simple, knowing smile. She looked at peace. "You forget me, and you be happy."
Magnetar crushed his fist together, and Starlight smashed into a cloud of dust. He opened his hand, the specks of Starlight's pearl decorating his palm, "I'm all you will ever need. You stay here and consider that until you finally understand it." He said, taking the remnants of what was once Starlight and leaving White to her sorrow.
The door locked behind him. White felt the floor against her, not remembering how she got on the ground. She cried. White couldn't feel herself tremble anymore. There was nothing but the pain that threatened to devour everything good left in the Universe, as if her own core had become a black hole too. A sound escaped her lips she didn't even know she could produce. It gave her grief form and provided a companion to her misery.
She watched the Black Hole past her window from her vantage point on the floor. Magnetar's scout ship left to carry out his mission, as if he hadn't just destroyed the one he claimed to love. She wanted him to hurt just as bad but didn't have the power to pull off such a feat.
The Black Hole beckoned again. This time, in its colorless gaping maw, she saw hope. Magnetar saw everything that happened in his ship. "But can you see under it?" She whispered to herself.
The Warp Pad was there, on the belly of the ship in the shadow of a laser cannon. If he had found it, Magnetar would have rubbed her face in it. She pushed herself to her feet, Starlight's last words pumping drive through her. Magnetar locked her inside her room, but she didn't need to get into the hallway.
White stumbled to the window. Her haggard reflection greeted her, poised over the distant Black Hole. She screamed out her frustration and threw every ounce of power into an attacking blast. The window imploded, the room's pressure and gases lost to the void in moments. White's body was adapted to it, and she threw herself away from the fake gravity of the ship.
The Warp was where she and Starlight had left it, hidden from Magnetar's sight on the outside of the Ship's hull. She hid it alongside the Rejuvenator in her Gem before shoving off from the ship. Her sights were locked on the Black Hole. She unleashed another blast of energy behind her, providing thrust to quicken her dash for freedom.
The Alloy scout ships that once hovered just out of the Black Hole's gravitational pull, broke away all at once. She knew they saw her. She knew Magnetar saw her. She pushed herself faster, determined to win this one struggle against him. Their ships had to tread carefully around the unpredictable space surrounding the exploded star and that slowed their attempts to stop her. White had no such reservations. Her goal was the heart of the Black Hole.
She felt his eyes on her. She sensed his desperation to snatch her up before she could escape into oblivion. She glanced over her shoulder. Magnetar's ship was close, but not close enough. A port on the scout ship opened, and she saw him. They locked eyes, the same hand Magnetar used to shatter Starlight now reached out, desperate to grab her.
"Goodbye," she mouthed, and then threw herself into the unyielding gravity of the Black Hole.
She tumbled out of control. The atoms in her light form bent, wanting to stretch apart into long strands of impossibility. 'Just a little further,' she promised. The light of the Universe became dim around her as reality warped. She used all the power she had to hold herself together. The light snuffed out, and she was now completely hidden in the cloak of the event horizon. White willed the Warp pad out of her Gem and activated it.
The crushing pressure around her vanished as a column of light snatched her away. She could see again, sparkling particles from the Warp beam dancing around her head. She didn't cheer, cry or move at all. She was numb. White trusted in her and Starlight's work and surrendered to wherever the Warp intended to take her.
Hard ground smacked her, and White lay in a heap. The Warp light was gone, and a planet's normal gravity had her. She looked around at the Organic world. A few organic light forms fled into the brush. She was alone, and Magnetar was gone.
She didn't wait to contemplate all that had happened. She stuck to the plan, her body and mind aching. She smashed the Warp tech, just in case Magnetar figured out a way of using it to track her. She pulled the Rejuvenator out of her Gem. What seemed like so long ago, she was excited to start over, Starlight at her side. Even without memories, they would have had each other. A life without fear of Magnetar.
Now, she longed to forget the pain Starlight's face brought. She intended to keep her promise.
White activated the Rejuvenator, and a beam of red light came to life. It's enchanting glow beckoned her. It promised a cure for her pain. "I'll be happy, Starlight. Thank you." She turned the device on herself and cut her light form through.
The pain of Magnetar's blows, the darkness of the Alloy ship, and Starlight's final smile. Every memory vanished like the last wisp of a fading nightmare, all forgotten before the dawn.
White caught Magnetar's gaze, her mind once more in the present. She felt the fear her old self had for him. But she had existed without him along side her Gems. Her ancient fear for him transformed into rage.
She launched forward, snatching for Starlight's shards. "Give her back!" she demanded. She slammed a blast into Magnetar, and he was pushed backwards towards the wall. She didn't let up. White flailed, energy flying at him.
He was pushed back again, brought to one knee. White rushed forward to hit the metal scale on his forehead point blank.
Magnetar caught her wrist. As she struggled to break free, he stood to loom over her again. "I understand, there is a lot to do before you are back to your normal, passive self," he pushed her backwards, her heels scraping the floor as she tried to stand her ground. "I'm a patient man. I can wait." He lifted her off the ground and walked them up the elevated platform in the center of the room. White pounded on his back and scratched at his face. She thrashed in his arms, but he didn't budge.
Magnetar dumped White on her pile of pillows and straddled her waist.
"Get off!" she hissed and shoved hard at his chest with both hands. He caught each offending wrist and pinned them down over her head.
"You don't remember the good times, White?" Magnetar asked. "We would spend endless lengths of time tangled in each other's arms. We can have that again." the last statement he spoke in a whisper. Then Magnetar crashed his lips into her own. She pursed her mouth in revulsion and bucked against him, trying to force him off. It was like the gravity of a planet laid on top of her, smothering her. He released her wrists, and she took the opportunity to resume shoving at his face.
Her boiling emotions turned icy when she felt his fingers snake down her torso, his lips leaving her lips and nipping at her neck. White's focus shifted from hurting him, to getting away from him. She snapped an incoherent protest when his hands stroked up her leg, slipping under her flowing light clothes. "Don't touch me! Stop it, Magnetar!" she snarled with weakening resolve. She couldn't get him off of her, no matter what attack or desperate flail she tried.
"You don't remember how good I made you feel. Let me remind you, love," He huffed hot in her ear. A shutter pricked up her spine. Cold needles followed the path his exploring hands led across her body. He ripped at her clothes to get better access to her skin.
Metal clicks. White paused her fight to see the scales of his armor shifting away. He pulled her close against him when his armor was gone, out of the way so his skin could encounter hers. White hated it, his body entrapping hers, hot and suffocating. The room spun. She felt sick. She was exposed and couldn't hide away. She was shackled to him.
A soft glow. Between wincing and her continued fight to claw herself from under him, she saw the Scale on his forehead, his core, was the source of the light. It almost reminded her of the light Gem's produced before they fused. But that was different. They danced in perfect synchronicity, trusting each other before becoming one being.
Her body felt heavy, her mind fuzzy. Her Gem was glowing despite her protest, "No, stop!" she pleaded, and the tears came, making her already wavering vision blurry. This wasn't right. She hadn't opened her mind to him. She had no desire to get closer to him. She looked away, willing herself to somehow meld through the floor and float away into the darkness of space.
Magnetar snatched her face in his hand and made her stay there, in the horrific present with him. At this moment, White recalled something, not from the distant past, but rather only a few days prior. A shaken Nephrite retrieved from Alloy imprisonment. They sat on the ground, shaken. "He didn't even have to touch us. He was just, inside our minds. Inside our Gems. He could read our thoughts." The comment suddenly made sense. Unlike fusion, Magnetar had the ability of melding them together without White's consent.
He shattered her barrier. Tore through her defenses like paper and invaded every inch. His presence was all encompassing, in White's memories and private thoughts. She felt his influence, his touch, under her skin, deep inside her. His influence took complete control from within, and she couldn't even squirm. She was frozen, mind, body, and Gem. She could only moan an occasional pleading protest, all which were ignored.
She heard his voice inside her head, breathless and hungry for her, "You're mine, White. Now be good and surrender to me."
White continued to cry, rendered naked, powerless, and unable to do anything but watch him ravage her.