A/N:...hey. Still not in the best mental state, but I'm getting there.
This is just a little gag skit that came into my mind, hopefully it brightens your day as much as mine.
As ever, I own no references, quotes, memes or themes. Not a wit or a one.
I'm just a humble author trying to make his way in this wild world.
Reviews have, and always will be, all the pay I ever receive...
To clarify, this IS "NGH" Naruto. Yup. You heard me.
As in the "Not Going Home" iteration.
Hope that explains things.
"Hey! Salem! Catch!"
~?
Catch
"So! You must be Salem. Gotta say you look the part."
The Queen of the Grimm reared back from the ruins with a frown.
...you know me?"
"Not really." a smile like sunshine flashed out in the moldering remains of her Grimm Whale. "The universe sends its regards."
A pale brow quirked. "And you are...?"
He actually had the gall to grin at her. "Naruto Uzumaki, wandering god at your service."
And bow, no less!
She certainly didn't know this blond boy before her; least of all the tattered orange-black rags he wore, much less those strange whiskered cheeks and those odd horns jutting from his head. Bright blue eyes beamed back at her, reminding her of another boy that had bested her recently -blasted Oscar and his blasted cane, how was she to know he was hiding a nuke in that thing, let alone that it would knock her down into Mantle?!- and yet somehow, his smile unnerved her all the more.
Enough of this tripe.
Her lips pursed in a scowl. "Naruto, was it? I'm sorry, but I've had an awful day, and I'm really not in the mood for...whatever this is."
"Great." he clapped his hands once and the air shifted. "Neither am I. I'm just here to collect the Relics and stall you. Said the same thing to Cinder, but she didn't really listen, soo...
Too late, she saw the staff in his hand, the lamp danging at his waist...and the severed head of a certain Maiden bound to his belt. It was a grisly trophy all things considered.
"Speaking of which! Catch!"
A mighty shadow fell over them both.
Salem looked up.
...
...
...
...what the actual hell."
Naruto beamed. "Atlas sends its regards, your majesty!"
Salem had all of an instant to swear be the floating city came crashing down on her head.
A/N: Like I said, just a fragment. Do you want this to be a story? Yes? No? Maybe so? Make yourselves heard!
Aaaand there we go. As ever, reviews keep me alive. Without them, I cannot write. So...in the Immortal Words of Atlas...
...Review...Would You Kindly? And have some previews -potential blot bin things- that I'm working on.
(Previews) AND ALL THE REFERENCES
"Daddy!"
"Aha!" he swept her up into his arms. "There's my little Rose!"
"Is that the Staff?!"
...it might be."
"How did you even?!"
R&R~!