The Laws Have Changed - Chapter 13
He was having the dream again. The dream. The one that he first experienced on his repeat of 15 October 1996. The one he had been consistently plagued with until he allowed Ginny into his life.
He looked on in morbid fascination at his blond hair, stained with dirt and blood. His eyes, a lifeless shade of obsidian as they stared at everything and nothing; the lids open and unmoving. His lips with their dark plum centers that blended out into a chapped light blue. His skin was covered with a sprinkling of the same dirt that sullied his hair, but the tone was the greyest it had ever been.
The first time he saw his dead body, it had been a shock to the system on that fateful night. But as he looked at it now, he just felt frustrated. Not even mad at the sight, or sad, or disgusted. Just a pure, insistent frustration that wondered how he got to that point in the first place. He had always known how, in both versions of his life, but the frustration had grown exponentially since being with Ginny as he continued to feel trapped in the forced servitude he was born into. Life and irony were cruel, and it did not escape his constant introspection that the families who had spent centuries relying on the fealty of the help had become the very thing they derided.
He almost wished that he could go back to when his grandfather had been attending Hogwarts so he could beat the ever-loving shit of out the man for ever thinking that someone like Tom Riddle would provide them the unparalleled power they were so desperate for. Sacred Twenty-Eight, his ass. There was nothing sacred about craving something they already had so badly that it turned into a disease that would eat away at their families for decades to come. However, if he went back that far, he wouldn't have his girlfriend in his life and he wouldn't give her up for the world.
He glanced up when he noticed two figures casually walk up to his body just as his mother let out her first inconsolable wail. He furrowed his brow, noticing that neither one of his parents even registered the intruders. A frown joined his brows when he realized that no one around them stopped to ask who the two observers were.
The first, he recognized with a start, was the man he had seen before his bath at the end of last term. His skin wasn't quite as pale as it had looked in the waning moonlight of his bedroom at Malfoy Manor, but he recognized the features that made him look so similar to his father. He was still wearing the cloak he previously saw him in, but there was also a delicate, gold-plated, laurel crown resting on his head. He took a pack of cigarettes out of some pocket and offered one to his companion, who scrunched her nose in distaste before shaking her head.
The cigarette-denier was a woman almost as tall as her male companion, making her about as tall as himself. She had a mass of hair, as red as Ginny's, pulled back into various sized plaits; some of which were thin enough to wrap around her head like elaborate ribbons. She was also had a cloak draped around her shoulders in a deep forest green, however, the glint of a sword hilt peeked out whenever she moved.
"This is your fault," the man finally announced, releasing a thick plume of smoke through his nostrils.
The woman coughed, waving away the acrid fog as she shot him a glare. "Just because I said I wanted him didn't mean that I wanted him dead now."
"See, this is the issue with us trying to inter-mingle." The strange man took another drag of his cigarette. "We each have different customs and it causes mix ups like these." A pause as he fiercely blew out another cloud of smoke before waving it away on his own. "You know how the old women are. If they like you enough, they take your requests to heart and then we end up with shit like this."
"What do you intend to do?" The woman scrunched her face in, reminding him of McGonagall.
"Well, I've already sent him back."
"How far back?"
"Over a year ago."
"Why?"
"You don't need to know, Frey."
"Oh god, you didn't do one of those idiotic quests, did you?" The man flicked his cigarette to the ground in response, purposefully avoiding her gaze. "I thought we agreed to stop with all that ancient nonsense."
The man crouched down, his body hovering over the dead one before him. "Listen, this little idiot needs it. He's too tragic and he needs something to nudge him in a different direction."
"If you tell me that this is some soulmates bullshit, I swear to god…" The woman clenched her fists at her sides.
The blond man snorted. "If it was, you'd know, wouldn't you?" He smirked when he saw his companion's eyes narrow dangerously. "No, it's not. I'm just interested in seeing what happens if he's given other options."
"You know that old man still has to die, right?"
The man stood, waving his companion's concerns away. "Yes, yes. Fucking bastard expected this to happen. I'm glad to be rid of him for at least six months."
"Draco?"
He could hear a voice calling out to him. He thought it sounded like Ginny's, but he couldn't be too sure. When he heard it again, it accompanied a small shake to his shoulders and he knew for sure that it was her.
He tried looking back to where his dead body laid and he was surprised to see the strange pair gone.
"Draco!"
He shook his head as his eyes jolted open. When he focused back in, he realized that he was still in his bathtub, with his girlfriend turned to him, concern written all over her face.
"Are you okay? You had fallen asleep and you looked more confused the longer you slept." She grabbed his hand under the now-tepid water. "Did you have a bad dream?"
He blinked several times and tilted his head down, forgetting any of his modesty as he took in the sight of their two naked bodies. He snapped his head back up, a pink flush spreading over every centimeter of his skin as he realized that all of the bubbles had since vanished. He swallowed hard, suddenly feeling how cottony his mouth became and how thick his saliva felt as he pushed it to the back of his throat.
"I don't know, Gin," he finally answered. Which was the truth. He wasn't entirely certain what it was that he had he witnessed and he needed time to process the overload of information the dream had given him. "I think we should get out of the tub, though, so I can sleep in my own bed."
She giggled and he smiled to see lightness return to her again. "I suppose so. I was starting to feel a bit like a prune right before I woke you up."
"I could say the same." He placed his hands on the side of the tub, moving to lift himself up. "Hang on and I'll grab a towel for you."
She rolled her eyes and proceeded to mimic his motions, water sloshing about as he quickly turned to protect her modesty. "It's okay to look at me, Draco," she murmured, wrapping her arms around his waist. She sighed as she rested her cheek against his back. "I…" There was hesitation in her voice and he silently took in a deep breath, waiting for her response. "I want you to look at me."
He let out the breath as quietly as possible, but it didn't stop the way it trembled as it left his body. "You do?" he whispered, the words sounding louder in the acoustic echo of his bathroom.
She nodded against his shoulder blade and squeezed him tighter to prove it. "I do. And, eventually, I would like to do more than just look." He felt her head tilt to look down, her lashes fluttering against his skin as she closed her eyes. "That is, if you'd like to do the same." Her words were a barely audible whisper, but they echoed in his mind.
For all of their mutually flirtatious bluster about physical intimacy, he felt reassured by the fact that it was still a topic that could be discussed like any other. While he knew it was slightly unrealistic of him to assume that Ginny would want it to be some deeply romantic, special moment, her acknowledgement of wanting to do more with him made his entire body warm.
He turned, gathering her face in his hands to force her to look at him. Her arms instinctively went around his waist once more and she smiled one of her sun-filled smiles at him. She sighed when he firmly pressed his lips to hers and he grinned when he broke away. "I'd like to do more than just look one day, too."
She awoke with a start the next morning, wondering why a pair of arms gripped her waist so tightly. Her body tensed in her malaise before slowly turning to figure out what was going on.
She relaxed at the sight of Draco's peaceful face, his light snores forcing her to press her lips together to prevent a giggle from escaping. The last time she had seen him look so worry-free was when they had shared a bed in the Hospital Wing. Every bit of stress that normally creased his face was gone. His lips were slightly open and not downturned into a small frown. His hair dropped in front of his eyes in little wisps that caught the morning light.
Her brows furrowed at the sense of heartache and sorrow she felt the longer she observed him. Seeing him like this was a shocking reminder of just how young they were. They were only a year apart, but neither one of them had been spared from the terror of war. The fact that Harry was the same age as her boyfriend, but was considered to be the sole savior of their entire world was a cruel joke that life felt like playing. They were fighting battles that their parents were still fighting. They were expected to be soldiers that were prepared to die with honor.
And she was terrified of that knowledge.
That she was willingly preparing students her age and younger to engage in a conflict against mostly adults. Because she couldn't imagine someone like Draco, or like Blaise, wanting to put their life on the line. They all wanted to simply survive these hectic times and hope that society would be kind to them as they tried to figure out what it meant to live during a time without war. They were all hoping to regain some of the innocence they had lost over these past three years.
She tasted a rush of salt on the edge of her mouth and realized that she had started crying the longer she contemplated their situation. She could tell that she was on the precipice of truly breaking down and she kept chewing on her lip to prevent it. This was the last thing she needed Draco to see upon waking. Her deciding to stay with him was meant to be a compassionate, tender moment between them and there she was; trying to stave off a panic attack as she spiraled into the black hole that was what their lives had become.
She scrunched her eyes closed and began taking deep breaths; each one shuddering through her as she tried to calm down. She tried turning away, hoping that she could get to a point where she wasn't a complete mess so early in the morning, but she felt his arms hold her tighter. The next thing she knew, she was being maneuvered so her head was pressed against the crook of his neck. His fingers began combing her hair, while he murmured words of strength and caring against her forehead. A sob finally racked through her at his unspoken permission, her arms squeezing him to the point of bursting.
"I know, Gin. I know."
"I'm so sorry, Draco." Her tears were running freely now. "I'm sorry for putting you in this position. I'm sorry for everything you're being put through. I'm sorry that I'm not strong enough to be there for you like I said I would." She was supposed to be his safety net. She was supposed to be the one who remained strong for the both of them, for everyone. And she had been. She was what kept him going during his summer break, what prevented him from slipping into madness as he was forced to torture others.
She felt his hand lift her face up by her chin. His palm moved to cup her cheek, but she couldn't bear to look at him. It was as though she was not only letting him down, but letting her family down. She was the youngest Weasley. She was the only girl amongst her siblings. She was meant to be rough and tumble. She was raised to be filled with vim and vigor. She wouldn't be her if she didn't have the spice that accompanied her sugar and everything nice. She may have cried over a broken heart, but she didn't cry over life's difficulties. That's not what Ginny Weasley was raised to do.
"You have nothing to apologize for, love. I promise."
She began to shake her head when something broke through her self-doubt. "You called me 'love,'" she whispered, slowly opening her eyes, knowing that they were impossibly wide as she zoomed in on that word.
His light eyes flitted up to the ceiling in thought and she smiled when she realized that he had picked up one of her tics. He brought his gaze back down, matching her amused expression. "So I did."
"What are you trying to say?" she asked, her thoughts racing around her mind at the possibility of him trying to distract her by admitting the extent of his feelings. It was incredibly underhanded and incredibly (read: infuriatingly) on brand for him.
He shrugged, his grip around her still tight, still secure and she had never felt more at home during these difficult times as she did in the shelter of his arms. "I don't know. What do you think I'm trying to say?"
She hated how much this was working on her, but she still found herself grateful for the normalcy he was trying to inject into her. In any other year, this is how he would've been. Annoyingly playful, unafraid to use diversionary tactics to get his desired result. And in any other year, she would've been more than game to play, wanting to know who would crack first. She knew he'd circle back to the previous topic if she insisted, but this wasn't any other year and she desperately needed the confirmation in that exact moment.
"What I think, Draco Malfoy, is that you're trying to tell me in the sneakiest way possible that you love me." She maintained eye contact with him, a triumphant smile tugging at her face as she tried to stare him down.
To her immense joy, he broke first, averting his eyes down as he chuckled. "It's possible," he mumbled, an obnoxious smirk lifting up the side of his mouth.
She let out a garbled cry, kicking her feet petulantly at his continued smarminess. He was lucky she already liked him so much that she had somehow fallen in love with the git because she didn't think she could tolerate his avoidance otherwise.
He laughed; a true, joyful laugh at her clear frustration. While she grinned because he knew how much she loved seeing this side of him. The one that wasn't worried about his appearance, or was trying to suppress his emotions. It was simply him finding amusement at a situation he had caused. His eyes were lit up by the loud expression and, suddenly, he didn't look like a seventeen-year-old who had seen enough death to last him a lifetime. He was simply a seventeen-year-old boy, period.
"Fine, fine," he began, "I know when I've been defeated and you do have this annoying knack of wearing down my defenses." Her grin grew wider at his words. If she were anyone else, he would've sounded exasperated by her constant prodding and questioning, but his eyes shone like bright stars against the dark backdrop of his four-post bed. She yelped when he flipped her onto her back; his arms bracketing her head, his legs straddling her waist as he hovered on all fours.
She had forgotten than he went to bed last night shirtless and the temptation to run a hand along his scars was almost too much to endure. Her face flushed at the thought and she was grateful that she was covered up by his silk pajamas. She cleared her throat to regain some of her earlier confidence. "You're stalling, Draco." She attempted a glare, but she knew she couldn't give it any venom due to her slightly puffy eyes and smug satisfaction.
"Why would I gain by stalling?" He queried, his gaze locked on to hers.
"Your own satisfaction at watching me beg." They both went bright red as soon as the words slipped out of her mouth. She would've covered her face with her hands if she wasn't so nervous to move and break the moment. Of course she had to let some kind of innuendo slip out of her at the most inopportune time. Had they hinted at having sex before? Yes, plenty of times since the beginning of their relationship. It was their whole bag as hormonal teenagers. However, the last thing she wanted was for him to think that their relationship was a means to a physical end. She knew that he knew it wasn't, but it would be nice to hear the words all the same.
He coughed, a pale pink blush still imbuing his cheeks with warmth. "Yes, well, I'm sure we can find a time to make that happen." He tried to shift his mouth into a smirk, but his amusement and slight embarrassment made his face contort more than he probably would've liked.
"Are you going to say it or not?" She arched a brow, her lips twisting into a more successful facsimile of a smirk.
He sighed, his body slumping before he sat up. He helped pull her up and shifted them until she was straddling his lap, his legs acting as a wall just below her bum. "You know I'm not the best at being sentimental." She chuckled when she noticed that he was pouting. Actually pouting at the idea of saying something that she knew would be met with derision if he were back home. She opened her mouth to reply before he cut her off. "However," he began, looking down as his brows scrunched in thought, "I don't think I would've been able to make it this far without you." He snapped his head back up, the waterline of his eyes red, the look of crazed desperation that had so often been visible on him last year suddenly reappearing. "I think I owe you my life, Gin, and holy shit, is that a lot to realize at seventeen."
A laugh trying to masquerade as a scoff came out of her lips, her eyes becoming glassy with an emotion that made her feel decidedly worldly and mature. She hoped their feelings weren't just a result of their shared trauma. She hoped he wanted to try experiencing the brave new world that she knew had to be waiting for them at the end of the school year. She hoped the attention and kindness she randomly decided to give him during that initial meeting in the Room of Requirement wasn't going to go to waste. She wished and hoped for so many things and she wanted him to be there for however much he'd allow.
"I know," she replied, resting her forehead on his. "Sometimes I wonder if we even truly know what it means. Or if we're just feeling this way because of our circumstances."
"I don't think I feel this way because of what we're dealing with." His tone was sure, unwavering and it bolstered her own surety. "And even if it does turn out to be the case after this whole mess is over, it wouldn't change how I feel right now, in this moment."
"And how do you feel right now, in this moment, Draco?" she whispered, her surety briefly faltering.
"That I love you and would do anything to protect you." He laced a hand with hers and brought them up to kiss the back of hers. "What about you?" he murmured against her skin.
She flipped the grip he hand on her, allowing her to place an equally soft kiss on the back of his palm. "Right now, in this moment, all I can think about is how much I love you and how much I want this world to be a better place. For the both of us."
He sighed and she watched the tension she didn't notice he'd been holding melt away as he cradled her face in his hands. "I'm glad to see we're in agreement then," he stated, pulling her close enough to seal their admissions with a kiss.
A/N: Thank you for reading and supporting! I'm happy I was somehow able to get this chapter out. I actually had entirely different scenes planned for it, but then Draco and Ginny decided that they wanted to let each other know how they felt and I wasn't about to stop them lol.
Since I still have the outline of what was initially supposed to happen in this chapter, I'm hoping that'll help me get chapter 14 out faster. Thank you again for all the support for this fic!