Follow Your Heart – The Cook Chronicles

Chapter 17 – Home Again

Colleen looked out the window of the passenger car. The view was no longer of flat prairie and endless sky. It had shifted at last to the more familiar landscape of towering mountain peaks and hillsides covered in green. She'd traversed this stretch of narrow gage many times during her commutes to and from college in Denver. In fact, they'd left Brian behind at the Denver station to turn in his assignments and catch up with his classes at that very same college, for his school year had not yet ended. In a few days' time, he'd be coming home for the wedding, then immediately head back for final exams.

Colleen found her eagerness mixing with worry the closer she got to Colorado Springs. She had left two years ago with the express goal of becoming a doctor. Everyone in town knew it. Everyone expected it. Matthew's toast – It won't be long before we start calling her Dr. Colleen Cooper – and Dorothy's article in the Gazette boldly proclaiming how Colleen would be leaving town a young lady and returning as a physician just like her mother, had seemed perfectly reasonable at the time. But now… now, she was returning just as she'd left.

She was still just Colleen.

She had let them all down.

On one level she knew it was silly. It wasn't for lack of trying that she hadn't earned her medical degree, and nobody would blame her for a quirk of the calendar. Yet as they grew closer to town – closer to home - she couldn't help but feel the sting of personal failure, returning without the initials M.D. after her name.

Unconsciously, her fists clenched the fabric of her skirt. Andrew noticed and covered her nearest hand with his larger one. "You're home. That's all that matters," he soothed quietly, seemingly reading her mind.

She thanked him with a brief smile before looking out the window again.

She hoped it was true.

As the train whistle pierced the air, the citizens of Colorado Springs gathered at the train station. They were there to welcome back one of their own – well, some of them were. Truth be told, some were here out of curiosity, as the more recent residents of this frontier town had not met the doctor's daughter in person, having only heard the tale from their neighbors of how the young physician from Boston had swept the country girl off her feet before they had married and gone off to Philadelphia so that she could become a doctor, too. It didn't much matter to them that the young woman was coming home without that degree and would need to head back east for another year in school. This was but a momentary pause in her quest - plus a chance to see that romantic husband of hers, too.

As the train slowed, the knot in Colleen's stomach tightened. She could see the crowd. Don't they know I didn't earn my degree? Colleen thought despairingly. She never enjoyed being the center of attention, having so many eyes fixed on her. She could only hope that they were here to greet other passengers, for the Colorado Springs line now carried two passenger cars instead of the one it had before.

Andrew courteously let the women exit first (which also allowed him to check that they hadn't accidentally left anything behind). Elizabeth and Rebecca, in turn, urged Colleen to step ahead of them, aware that this moment belonged to her.

Colleen stepped out into the bright afternoon sun. There was the usual hubbub of the station, but several voices all shouting the same name drew her attention.

"Colleen!"

The instant the young woman spotted her family, everything else vanished. "Ma!" Without thinking she dropped her valise and rushed into her mother's embrace. "Ma."

"Oh, Colleen. Sweetheart."

Both women were flooded with happiness. The crowd around them applauded its approval. There were murmurings of Awww and Isn't that sweet. Then someone shouted, "Welcome home, Colleen!" which was taken up by others, causing the two women to break apart self-consciously.

"Thank you," Colleen said through joyous tears, addressing the crowd. She was happy, she was relieved. She was home. Degree or no, they accepted her. "Thank you all for being here to welcome me back."

Matthew was next to envelop her, followed by a hug from Emma. Three and a half-year-old Katie presented her with a small bouquet of wildflowers. "I pick dees for you."

"Oh, Katie…" Colleen took the flowers and hugged her little sister. "They're beautiful."

Elizabeth and Rebecca joined the group, generating a fresh round of greetings and hugs.

By the time Andrew made his way off the train - after courteously letting several others pass before him - his wife was lost in the throng.

"Welcome back," said a familiar drawl to his left.

The speaker was Hank Lawson, proprietor of the Gold Nugget Hotel & Saloon. Andrew wasn't surprised to see the tall, blond man at the station. Greeting arriving passengers was a way to drum up business for his establishment, as the girls who, ahem, entertained gentlemen weren't allowed to solicit off saloon property.

The young doctor tucked his medical bag under his left arm to free his right for a handshake. The two men had had a cordial relationship during Andrew's prior residency, even joining forces a couple of times when Michaela and the family had been in mortal danger. "Thank you, Hank. It's good to be back."

"Bit surprised to see your wife lookin' so thin, if you get my drift. Guess the little woman was too busy studyin' to take care of ya," Hank smirked.

And there it was. Andrew knew someone was bound to comment sooner or later on the absence of progeny, but he hadn't expected it to be this soon. Leave it to Hank to beat everyone to the punch. "Hank, it's really none of your concern," he replied evenly, hoping the older man would take the hint and let it drop.

Hank, however, refused to be daunted. If anything, Andrew's attempt to dissuade him had the opposite effect. He knew how to push people's buttons, and he wasn't about to disappoint the men who were hovering nearby, just waiting for him to land a zinger. Hank leaned in as if to speak to Andrew privately but kept his voice just loud enough for those close by to overhear. "Now that you're home I'm sure she'll be able to squeeze you in."

Andrew's face grew warm as the men around them chortled at the innuendo.

"Don't pay any attention to him, Andrew," Sheriff Daniel Simon advised, having heard this last part and coming to Andrew's rescue a beat too late. "He's just sore he lost the election for sheriff again. Welcome back."

They shook hands. "Thank you, Daniel."

The two men threaded their way through the crowd, some folks offering a friendly greeting or slap on the back as he passed. At last, he reached the spot where Colleen stood with her family. "Michaela."

"Andrew." She gave him a warm hug and kiss on the cheek. "Welcome home."

Andrew exchanged greetings with Matthew and Emma before asking, "Where's Sully?"

"He's scouting today. He'll join us later for supper. You remember Katie, don't you?" Michaela indicated the little girl standing at her side.

Of course, he remembered Katie, though not as she appeared now. She had grown some, obviously, from when he'd seen her last, and her bright blond baby hair had grown out and darkened a few shades, but she was still unmistakably Katie, with her father's eyes and her mother's mouth. And though he remembered her well, Andrew knew she wouldn't have any memory of him, so he squatted to introduce himself. "Hi, Katie. I'm Andrew."

"Hi, Andew." Everyone was charmed at this mispronunciation of his name, including the man in question. Katie, however, had grown bored from all the standing around. She looked up at her mother to ask, "Can we go home now?"

"In a moment, sweetheart. We need to get Colleen and Andrew's trunks first." Matthew and Daniel took their cue to head to the baggage car with Andrew, and with the reunion completed, the townsfolk also dispersed.

The women walked towards the family wagon, Colleen and Emma falling into step behind the three older ladies.

"Thank you for being my matron of honor," Matthew's fiancée said in her southern lilt.

"Of course. I can't wait to see your dress."

"Come by the shop before the weddin' and I'll show it to you."

"Your own shop, just like you always dreamed about."

"It's true what they say. You work long and hard enough, your dreams can come true."

"And another dream's coming true when you marry my brother?" Colleen teased.

They shared a giggle. "Matthew's been wonderful to me," the raven-haired beauty said, growing serious. "After everythin' I did to get my shop, workin' at the saloon, and leavin' to work for Gilda. He took me back."

"He never stopped loving you," Colleen reassured her.

They continued to chat while the trunks were loaded. Once that task was complete everyone parted ways, with Elizabeth and Rebecca headed off for the Spring Chateau for a few hours respite before dinner. Daniel and Emma went back to their respective jobs, and Matthew accompanied his family back to the Sully homestead to assist his brother-in-law with unloading the wagon.

Colleen sat in the back with Katie, leaving the buckboard seat for Michaela and Andrew, for it would have been too cramped with three adults up front. Mathew rode his horse Scout.

Michaela picked up the reins from habit, then hesitated. "Andrew, would you care to drive?"

He was about to decline, fully aware of her ability to drive, before changing his mind. Relinquishing control was a thoughtful gesture. "Oh, uh, thank you. Let's see if I remember the way," he joked, easing the awkwardness of the moment.

Michaela smiled and handed him the leather straps.

"The town really has grown," Andrew remarked as they pulled away from the station. It was one thing to hear about it happening in Michaela's letters to Colleen, and another to see it in person. Though it was still a far cry from a bustling city like Philadelphia - or even the more moderately sized Denver - Colorado Springs had nearly tripled the number of buildings while he and Colleen had been away. "I suppose it was inevitable once it was chosen for the county seat."

"That's certainly played a part. But some people have said they've moved out here because they had difficulty making a living in the city. Others have come here seeking the 'rest cure' for their tuberculosis. Of course, the air here doesn't cure their consumption, but it does provide them with some relief."

Andrew nodded. No one yet understood what caused the disease that cruelly wasted away, or consumed, the body, but it had become increasingly clear to the medical establishment – and by extension the public at large - that the thinner, fresher air at altitude somehow eased the consumptive symptoms, enabling sufferers to live longer lives. "That must keep you busy, having so many more people and patients to care for."

"You're right, it does. Fortunately, I've only had to confine a few patients for short stays at the clinic before they recovered enough to go home. But if people keep coming to Colorado for their health, I'm afraid my clinic will become overrun with tuberculosis cases and then I won't have any place to treat everyone else."

Andrew was all too aware of the town's lack of a hospital, the proper place for the care of the sick when they couldn't be cared for at home. The clinic had been overrun before during the diphtheria epidemic, leaving no room for other patients. That had been for a limited time, however. There wasn't an upper limit to the number of tuberculosis sufferers seeking aid – and if they were all flocking to the same general vicinity, a small town like Colorado Springs could quickly become overwhelmed. "Someone's bound to come along with the means or influence to get a hospital or sanitorium built."

"So far, they've yet to step forward," she replied with a touch of cynicism. "And the enabling act wasn't of any help either. It set aside land for schools and even a state prison but said nothing about providing land for medical facilities."

"Yes, I read about that finally getting through Congress," Andrew said, latching onto the change of topic. It provided him with the perfect opportunity to make a discreet inquiry, for Colorado statehood was one of Preston's main interests. Michaela's letters hadn't said much of anything about Preston after the early news about him turning over a new leaf, and frankly, Andrew was curious for an update. "I bet Preston's excited."

"We all are," Michaela admitted, easing into a smile. "It's not every day one gets to form a new state."

That's certainly true. He thought of asking again for news of Preston then decided to let it drop, for Michaela had piqued his interest on another matter. "And Sully… is he really as excited about it as everyone else?"

"Not entirely," she allowed. "But he's known that statehood was coming sooner or later, so he's had some time to adjust to the idea. And I reminded him that it could mean more chances to protect the land. If the federal government chooses not to protect it for whatever reason, then the state representatives might be persuaded to step in and protect it instead."

"I hope you're right. It would be a shame to lose all of this natural beauty," Andrew said, glancing around at the scenery.

"Yes. It would."

Michaela peered over her shoulder at her two daughters and gestured to Andrew that he should take a look himself. When he did, he saw little Katie resting against her big sister, asleep.

Some things never changed.

At the homestead, while Michaela carried Katie up to her room for a nap, Colleen, Andrew and Matthew brought in the luggage. Andrew had never set foot upstairs before, having been limited to the main floor on prior visits, so before Matthew returned to town, he gave a quick tour. Katie's room was right next to Michaela and Sully's. The other two rooms belonged to Brian and Colleen, though for the last two years Colleen's room had been occupied by her big brother. With Colleen home again, Matthew had moved his things temporarily into Brian's room before the wedding, giving his sister her old room back.

Spying the matching furniture in Colleen's room – a poster bed, dresser, oval mirror, and bureau all in dark walnut – Andrew surmised the set was courtesy of Mrs. Quinn, though he would never be so rude as to inquire.

Colleen sat on the bed with a small sigh. During her previous trips home from college, her room had felt like an old friend. But now, having lived away so long, it kind of felt like she was moving in for the first time. "It feels strange," she said in a quiet voice as Andrew joined her. "This is my room, and yet, somehow it isn't."

"It's understandable," he said, laying his hand over hers in his familiar gesture of comfort. "You've just spent two years away. It's bound to feel a little strange to be back here again… But in a way, darling, you're right. This isn't your room anymore and never will be yours again." At her alarmed look, he squeezed her hand and added, "Because as long as we're staying here, it's our room."

Colleen's mood instantly lifted. She had felt inexplicably out of place in her old environs, but no longer. Her husband had provided her with a new foundation. "Our room." She liked the sound of that.

To bring his point home Andrew leaned in to give her a gentle kiss, which readily became several more, before he pulled back. "I hate to spoil this moment, but there's something you should know. When we were at the station, Hank made a rather crude comment regarding our lack of children. He said that you would have time for… conjugal activity now that you have time off from school," he related, deciding to sanitize the original remark.

And just like that, Colleen's mood shifted again to a mixture of embarrassment and anger. Of course, she'd known about Hank's off-color commentary, but had never been the target of it until now. "He's saying things about me?"

"Colleen, you know what it's like here. People are bound to speculate about our lack of children whether they say it in front of us or not. I know it's difficult, but we should try not to worry about it. We know the truth, and the truth is, it's no one's business but our own." He squeezed her hand again before brushing a kiss her temple and standing upright. "Why don't we unpack," he said, providing them both with a productive distraction. "Then we can visit with your mother. I'm sure she's eager to hear all about your time in medical school."

The twenty-year-old was still unhappy, but what else could she do? She was of age now, subject to Hank's barbs and town gossip just like anyone else.

She could only hope that someone (or something) else would quickly come along to provide fresh fodder, like her brother's wedding… Although now that Colleen thought about it, there really wasn't much – if anything - left to be said about Matthew and Emma that hadn't already been said when they had first become close friends. And as hurtful as some of those comments had been, the couple had managed to weather the storm of public opinion.

Well, if Matthew and Emma could get through it, then she and Andrew would, too.

As Andrew predicted, Michaela was thrilled when they went downstairs a short time later to talk while she prepared supper. Since there would be extra mouths to feed that evening, Colleen helped in the kitchen as they chatted. When Katie woke from her nap and joined them, talk inevitably switched to the upcoming wedding, and Katie's role in it, and Katie - eager to show off for Colleen and Andrew that she knew just what to do in her role as flower girl - created a small mess by abruptly seizing a tiny handful of carrots from the prep table and dropping them on the floor.

"Katie!" Michaela chastised. She grabbed a small bowl and handed it to her. "We talked about this. You are only to practice with the chicken feed. Now pick up your mess."

"Yes, mama," a subdued Katie replied, squatting to do as she was told.

"And when you're finished, perhaps Andrew could take you out to the barn. I'm sure the horses will appreciate the snack." Michaela gave him a look, hoping he'd understand she was trying to get the little girl out from underfoot.

Fortunately, he did. Andrew had predicted that his former mentor would want some time alone with Colleen for some girl talk, and this was as good a time as any. "That's a great idea," he encouraged. "And you can show me how you practice with the chicken feed."

As Katie and Andrew headed out the front door, Michaela shook her head amusedly. "Katie's been practicing with the chickens every chance she gets," she revealed to her eldest daughter. "They're getting so plump I think we'll be eating a few after the wedding."

"Katie's grown bigger, too," Colleen noted. "She needed Brian's help at my wedding, and now she can do it all by herself."

"Yes. Though she still needs help with tying her boots and ribbons and gets cranky if she doesn't have her afternoon nap." Michaela's expression changed, turning contemplative.

"Ma, what is it?"

She sighed. "Oh, Sully and I had hoped for a time we could give Katie a little brother or sister. But it hasn't happened, and now… now it's looking like it never will."

"Oh, Ma. I'm sorry."

"There's really nothing to be sorry about. We already have four beautiful children, and as busy as we are these days, perhaps it's just as well." Or so Michaela kept telling herself. It didn't take away the disappointment, though.

"But still, it's hard letting go of hope."

"Yes. It is."

"Don't worry, Ma. Even if you can't have any more children of your own, someday you'll get to hold your grandchildren." Emma had told her that she and Matthew planned to adopt a baby in the future, and Michaela already knew of Colleen's own desire to have children one day.

"Yes, I look forward to that… and it reminds me that I owe you an apology."

"An apology? What for?"

"For doubting you. For thinking that you and Andrew would let nature take its course regardless of the consequences. But the two of you made the hard choice to be careful, and take precautions-"

"How do you know about that?" Colleen interrupted.

"My supply room was short a few things after you left. It wasn't difficult to figure out who had had access to the room, and who would be courteous enough to leave money behind to pay for what they had taken."

"Oh." Though it was slightly embarrassing to discuss the details, Colleen was glad that her mother knew the truth about why she and Andrew didn't have children yet.

"I'm proud of you, Colleen. You and Andrew both, for prioritizing your education. And I'm sorry I doubted your priorities."

"It's all right, Ma. Actually, I was going to let nature take its course. Andrew's the one who said we needed to use prophylactics," Colleen explained, utilizing the medical term for preventative products. "He said he didn't want anything to interfere with my schooling, and that it was the best way."

"He's right. Aside from abstinence, it is the best means of preventing pregnancy." Michaela sighed again. "I wish more women felt comfortable talking to me about this, not just the girls working for Hank. But with that Comstock Law in effect, it's even more of a taboo subject than it was before."

Colleen's eyes widened as a thought came to mind. "Has Daniel threatened to put you in jail?"

"No. As a matter of fact, when the law first passed, Daniel made a point of telling me that what goes on behind closed doors is none of his business. But if anyone else decides to make an issue out of it, I can simply say the items help prevent disease, which is perfectly true."

"Andrew said the same."

Michaela smiled. "He's a very intelligent man. I'm glad everything's worked out for the two of you, Colleen, and that we have this time together before you go back to school. To Harvard of all places."

"I can hardly believe it myself sometimes."

"Well, you've worked hard, and you deserve to be there. I know Mother will be pleased to have you in Boston with her. With Maureen and Claudette gone, Rebecca's the only one she sees regularly."

Michaela felt a brief pang of guilt that she lived so far from her mother. But the feeling was easily dismissed, for they actually had a better relationship now that they lived far apart than they'd ever had while living under the same roof. And, of course, they still had occasion to visit the other, such as for Matthew's wedding.

"There." Michaela surveyed the work they'd done to replace the vegetables Katie had deposited on the floor. "Now, let's peel the potatoes, and perhaps we can enlist Andrew and Katie to do the mashing when they return from the barn."

Dinner that night was a lively affair, with much to talk about - Philadelphia, Boston, the trip west, Sully's work, Matthew's work, and the wedding. When Elizabeth asked who was giving the bride away, Sully, Michaela, Matthew and Emma all looked at Thomas, and Emma gave her younger sibling an encouraging nod.

"I am, ma'am. I'm walkin' with Emma."

Before Elizabeth could respond to that, another voice chimed in. "I'm walkin' in the weddin' too."

"Of course you are, Katie," Elizabeth replied automatically, turning her attention to her granddaughter. "Every wedding needs a flower girl."

"And I get a new dwess," the little girl continued, happy to be part of the grownups' conversation at last. "Wanna see it?"

"You can show off your dress after dinner, Katie," Michaela said. "Remember, we don't want it to get dirty."

Katie returned her attention to her grandmother. "Do you get a new dwess, too?"

"Not this time. I brought a dress I save for special occasions."

"Can I see it after dinna?"

"I'm afraid I left it at the hotel. But you'll see me wearing it at the wedding. Everyone will be all dressed up, and we'll take pictures to remember the day and how nice everyone looked."

"Befoe everyone gets their dwess dirty," Katie agreed, prompting smiles from the adults.

Eventually the evening came to an end, and Colleen and Andrew went upstairs to their room. Weary from the long day, they fell asleep within minutes of laying their heads on the pillows.

:

When Colleen awoke the next day, she experienced a moment of disorientation. She was in her old room, the view from the bed familiar… and yet, something felt off. The twenty-year-old lay there in the morning stillness, trying to put a finger on it, until it finally hit her – it was the silence. She was no longer in the city, with the sounds of horse hooves clopping and wagons passing along their morning route, dropping off milk or ice or transporting people to where they needed to be.

She moved her arm a fraction, enough to brush it against her husband's, having learned that this was a gentle way of waking him up. She then pressed herself against him, and Andrew reflexively wrapped an arm around her – a common way for them to start a weekend, cuddling a bit before getting up. Only this wasn't the weekend. They were on a short break, Michaela insisting that they take a few days to relax before the wedding. Should any medical emergency happen where she needed their help, she would let them know.

"Mmm," Andrew said finally. "I'd forgotten how quiet and peaceful it is here."

"I was thinking the same thing."

"It seems a shame to disturb it by getting up," he added, enjoying this rare morning where they didn't have to be anywhere in particular. He loved the way Colleen felt in just her nightgown, unencumbered by her corset and layers of petticoats. He didn't understand how women could tolerate wearing so much restrictive, impractical clothing. He certainly wouldn't be able to! "Couldn't we pretend we're tired from the long trip and just lie here all morning?"

"You really want to miss breakfast?" Colleen teased. She'd found Andrew to be a typical male, never missing a meal unless he was very sick.

"Well, when you put it that way… and I suppose it would be rude not to join your family. Sully is the one responsible for me being here after all."

"Sully? But I thought Grandma's the one who asked you to come here to help Ma."

"That's true," he confirmed, lightly stroking her arm. "I never would have met you otherwise. But my presence here today, in your – pardon me, our room – is entirely Sully's doing. He encouraged me to propose when I did."

Colleen shifted her position to look at him directly. "Really? He said you should propose to me?"

"Well, not in so many words… I was concerned about you leaving for medical school, and he said that if I wanted to keep you in my life that I should do something rather than worry about it. Thinking it over, I realized that the only possible action I could take to keep us together was to marry you, that his advice was his way of giving permission for us to be married. So, the way I see it, Sully's the one who's most responsible for my presence here today."

Not for the first time, Colleen felt immense gratitude that Sully was part of her life. He was so much more of a father to her than her real father was. And now it seemed she had yet another reason to be grateful, for giving Andrew the nudge to propose to her. "I'm glad you listened to him."

"So am I." Andrew was sorely tempted to kiss her but was afraid if he did that while they were still in bed, he would start something he'd be unable to finish. And so, reluctantly, he peeled himself away from his wife so they could get up and start their day.

:

"Good morning," Michaela said as Colleen and Andrew came downstairs. "Breakfast is about ready."

"Mm, I can smell that," Colleen replied, seeing the eggs, ham, jelly, and butter all laid out on the table. "Anything I can do to help?"

Michela set a basket of biscuits on the table. "Thanks for offering, but I can manage. Breakfast for the family is rather easy compared to a large dinner party like last night."

"You goin' into town today?" asked Sully as the serving dishes were passed around.

"Yes, I want to see everything that's new and catch up with everyone," said Colleen. Well, everyone except Hank.

"Do you wanna ride in the wagon with Michaela, or should I saddle up some horses for ya?"

Colleen exchanged a look with Andrew, who shrugged and said, "Lady's choice."

"We'll take the horses, Pa."

Sully beamed at the title. The children had their own pa, Ethan Cooper, but had taken to calling Sully 'Pa' on occasion as a term of affection.

Later, faced with mounting a horse again, Andrew wondered why he'd deferred to Colleen. He'd forgotten the leg muscles required in riding a horse and didn't get a strong enough push off the ground on his first mounting attempt, mounting successfully on the second try. "There we go."

Astride Brian's smaller horse Taffy, Colleen watched her husband in amusement. "We'll go slow. It's been a long time for me, too," she reminded him.

"Then why didn't you want to go in your mother's wagon?"

"This way, we don't have to rely on her for a ride home," Colleen replied practically.

Colleen and Andrew nudged their horses into a walk to begin the journey towards town. They didn't say anything at first, instead taking in the natural surroundings and getting reacquainted with being back in the saddle.

"It's funny," Colleen said after a while, giving voice to her private thoughts. "Riding with you like this, it's almost like Philadelphia never happened. But I remember it all."

"It's a good thing you do. You'd find Harvard incredibly difficult if you didn't remember the last two years," he joked before becoming serious. "Colleen… now that we're back, and you have some time away from your studies, I'd like you to start considering where you want us to live once you've earned your medical degree."

He had her full attention. "You want me to decide?"

"I know it's traditional that the man decides, but if we're going to be working together as partners, then it seems only fair that you should have a say where that partnership will be. You might have strong feelings about settling here to be near your family. I want to respect that."

"But your family's in Boston."

"That didn't stop me from moving here before," he reminded her. "I think I've already proven that I'm willing to follow you wherever you need to be. Philadelphia, Boston, here… just as long as we're together, Colleen, I'll be happy."

Colleen didn't reply, taking this in. Choosing where to live was a monumental decision. It wouldn't just be where they practiced medicine together, but in all likelihood, it would also be where they would raise their family. Fortunately, he was giving her time to think about it. She was glad she didn't have to decide immediately, for the closer they got to town, the more her thoughts centered on the individuals she was most anxious to visit.

But first, she needed to stop and gather some wildflowers.

"Who are those for?" Andrew asked.

"Some very special people." She didn't elaborate, but the wistful way she said it gave Andrew a hunch – which Colleen confirmed when she ultimately led them in the direction of the town cemetery under the sprawling oak tree next to the church.

After dismounting and tying off the horses along the fence, Colleen hesitated.

With three gravesites to visit, she didn't know where to begin.

"Why don't you start with Becky," Andrew suggested, if for no other reason than she was the one that he knew best. As mutual friends of Colleen, they had spent some time together once Colleen had left for college in Denver, talking about Colleen and the town – which, Andrew discovered, was really all they had in common. It had been a pleasant friendship, but in the end, nothing more than that. "Take all the time you need."

Colleen nodded gratefully and knelt at the grave of her former best friend, setting down a spray of wildflowers.

"Hi, Becky. I'm sorry I haven't thought about you in a long time. There was so much to study in school, and I had my other friends to talk to... and now they're all doctors. They all graduated. But I didn't… I wasn't old enough. So, I have to wait 'til next year. But I'm not going back to the Woman's Medical College. Andrew's father got me into Harvard Medical School. I know it sounds incredible, but it's true. And when they see that the sky isn't falling having me there, they'll have to let other women study there, too." Colleen paused. trying to see if she'd forgotten anything important. "I wish I could still talk to you in person. I miss you, Becky."

Colleen moved to the next grave, laying another small bouquet.

"Hi, Aunt Marjorie. I know you heard what I told Becky and that I'm going to Harvard. I know you would have loved to see that. I'm sorry you won't be able to… or maybe you will, from where you are in heaven… I hope I'll do you proud and advance the cause of women getting to study with the men." Colleen took a moment to glance over at Andrew, sitting on the bench, waiting respectfully. "Aunt Marjorie, I know you think a woman doesn't need to be married to be happy, but I want you to know that being married to Andrew makes me happy."

Colleen made her way to her third and final destination.

"Hi, Ma," Colleen said at the gravesite of Charlotte Cooper.

Colleen sunk to the ground and didn't say anything for a long while after laying her last sprig of flowers. Andrew kept watch, thinking Colleen might be shedding silent tears. But she never dabbed at her eyes or sniffled. Her face didn't grow red. At last, she spoke.

"It's funny, Ma. I thought I had so much to say to you, but now that I'm here, I feel like I've said everything to Becky and Aunt Marjorie." Colleen let out a breath. "But there's one thing I haven't told you yet. I know it seems like I keep moving farther away from you, Ma. But wherever I go, I'll always remember you. I'll always keep you in my heart."

Andrew was suddenly by her side, kneeling, and she glanced at him.

The twenty-eight-year-old cleared his throat self-consciously, for he wasn't accustomed to speaking to a deceased loved one. "Hello, Charlotte," Andrew said, surprising Colleen. She thought he had come over to support her, not talk to her real mother. "We haven't spoken before, but I'm Andrew, Colleen's husband. I just wanted you to know that meeting your daughter was the best thing that's ever happened to me. I couldn't ask for a better wife. And for however many years we have together, I'll always do my best to keep her safe and make her happy."

He looked at Colleen with love in his eyes. She returned his look and held it a moment before giving a slight nod that she was ready to go.

Andrew stood and offered a hand to help her up. It was only then that they noticed the music emanating from the church. "Let's stop in and say hi," said Colleen. They made their way out of the cemetery and down the little footpath that led to the church entrance. "It's hard to believe that the last time we were here was our wedding day."

"The happiest day of my life."

Colleen halted her stride, pulling him up short. "What about the day we changed our minds about postponing the wedding?"

He gave her a puzzled look. "What about it?"

"You said before that that was the happiest day of your life."

"Did I say that?" It had been a momentous week, that May of 1873 – Colleen's college graduation, deciding to propose, quitting his job at the Chateau, packing for Philadelphia, getting Colleen a ring only to call off the wedding when Michaela objected… no wonder his prior claim had slipped his mind! "Clearly, I spoke too soon. Consider that day demoted to second happiest. I can't imagine anything better than our wedding day."

"Speaking of our wedding, are you going to surprise me again for our anniversary?"

Her question caught him off guard. Honestly, he hadn't thought about it at all, as he'd been entirely focused on their move back to Colorado Springs. "Well, if I told you I was, it would no longer be a surprise, would it? But no, I haven't made any special plans. I really haven't heard of people celebrating a second anniversary."

"I suppose not." Colleen did her best to hide her disappointment.

Attuned to her reaction, the young doctor offered, "But that doesn't mean we couldn't do something, if you want. We could have dinner at the Chateau, or-"

"A picnic," she interjected. "We could go on another picnic."

The corner of his mouth raised in a boyish smile. "Let me guess… with Grace's meatloaf sandwich and oatmeal cookies?"

"Don't forget the lemonade. And-"

"Shakespeare." They said it together with matching smiles.

"Absolutely. It wouldn't be the same without them," Andrew added delightedly.

Much as the rest of Colorado Springs had changed and grown, the church had been modified and expanded, too, to accommodate the larger population. What Colleen and Andrew had known as the "church" was now the front section of a much larger structure, with a larger sanctuary built as an expansion in the rear. It would never rival the great churches and cathedrals of Philadelphia, but for Colorado Springs the expanded structure was impressive, second only to the new town hall/courthouse in size.

"Reverend?"

Reverend Timothy Johnson turned away from where he was seated at the piano playing a hymn. "Colleen? Is that you?"

"Yes. We wanted to say hi."

"Well, hello. Please, come in. That must be Andrew with you."

"Yes, I'm here," Andrew replied, exchanging a glance of amazement with Colleen. "How did you know?"

The Reverend stood and held out his hand for a handshake, which Andrew took. "From your footsteps. A man's footsteps sound differently from a woman's," the blind minister explained. "And besides, who else should I expect to be accompanying Mrs. Cook but her husband?"

"You're a married man now, too. Congratulations."

"Thank you. Missy was here earlier-"

"I'm still here, Timothy," Melissa Johnson called out. Colleen and Andrew could see she was heavy with child as she made her way towards them, a walking stick to help guide her way, for she, too, was blind like her husband. "I just walk a little slower these days."

No wonder Hank said what he did, thought Colleen as she watched the expectant mother. Everyone's having babies except me.

"Andrew and Colleen Cook, my wife, Missy," Johnson introduced.

She held out a hand to the air, which Andrew took to shake hands. "Pleased to meet you," Missy said. "Timothy has told me so much about the two of you, and I've heard stories from Michaela, of course."

"It's a pleasure to meet you as well," Andrew replied. "I'm afraid all we heard from Michaela was that you'd been married. We had no idea you were expecting."

"That was my doing," she said, finding her husband's arm and sliding her hand around it. "I asked her not to say anything. Didn't want to count my chickens."

"Of course," Andrew replied, sharing a look with his wife. They both understood how things could go horribly wrong with a pregnancy, turning happy news tragic without warning.

"But now that she's in her final month we've told Missy's family," Johnson added quickly. "They had a right to know, and once the baby's born I imagine we'll need all the help we can get."

"That's good to hear," said Andrew. "I know Colleen's assistance was invaluable to Michaela after Katie was born."

"Yes, and Saturday there will be another joyous addition to your family, although this one won't be so labor intensive," the pastor remarked light-heartedly. "We're all grateful that Matthew was able to overcome his grief over Ingrid and find love again."

"I can't believe they waited to get married just so I could be here," Colleen marveled.

"There's nothing more important than family," Johnson replied. "And besides, it gave Matthew time to build a new homestead."

The old homestead – the one Sully originally had gifted to Matthew as a home for him and Ingrid - had burned down during the Indian riots of '72, and Matthew had taken to sleeping in Colleen's room in the new homestead when his sister was away at school. It was only now, with mention of a new homestead, that Colleen realized Matthew and Emma would want a place to call their own outside of town. "That's right. I… I completely forgot about that."

"It's understandable," Johnson soothed. "You were busy with your life in Philadelphia, you couldn't be expected to remember everything going on here. Now that you're back, you have plenty of time to catch up with everyone."

A parishioner arrived to speak to the Reverend, so the Cooks took their leave.

"Where to now?" Andrew asked as they retrieved and remounted their horses.

"I want to see Grace and Alexander. But let's go the long way and avoid the saloon."

During their journey west, Brian had filled in some of the key details their mother had left out of her letters. Among them was that the café had closed to expand the livery now that the local population had increased, with more visitors than ever wanting mounts, buggies and wagons to explore the area. The forced relocation had prompted the evolution of Grace's Café into Grace's Restaurant, with living quarters above for the Freeman family. Though it lacked the café's scenic view of the meadow, the indoor seats meant fewer flies disrupting diners, and a far warmer place to enjoy a meal during the colder months.

Grace was turned away from the entrance, writing the lunch menu on the board, when Colleen and Andrew arrived. "Can I help you folks?" She then looked up and burst into a big smile. "Well, look who's here!" She gave Colleen a big hug. "Oh, it's good to see you! C'mon in," she continued, ushering them to a corner table by the front window. "Can I get you anything? Coffee?"

"Coffee would be great," Andrew said, even though they'd already had some at breakfast. It seemed impolite to stop by for a visit and not order something.

"Rachel, two coffees," Grace called out to one of the black women working there. "So, whatta think?" she asked with a wave of her arm, indicating the place. The tables were draped in the familiar checked cloth with flower centerpieces. A couple of photographs hung on the walls for additional decoration.

"It's very nice," said Colleen.

"You've done well, Grace," said Andrew, and he meant it, glad to see the woman looking happy and healthy again. The woman had fallen into a depression and dependency on alcohol when her adopted son Anthony had died, but it was clear from her demeanor that those dark days were behind her.

Grace beamed. "The view's not what it used to be, but at least folks don't gotta smell them horse biscuits no more," she joked with them. Rachel came then to set down their coffees. "I hear you're takin' a few days off before the weddin'."

"Michaela insisted," said Andrew. "I admit, it's a little odd not having anything to do except wander around town like a visitor."

"Well, if you really feel that way, I could use an extra hand around here," Grace joked.

"Actually, we were hoping we could meet Alexander," said Colleen.

"He ain't here. He's at the kinder care."

"The what?"

Grace looked at the matching bewildered expressions on her two guests. "Didn't Dr. Mike tell you?"

"No, she didn't."

"It must've slipped her mind," added Andrew. And understandably so - running her clinic, preparing for his and Colleen's return to Colorado Springs, the forthcoming wedding…

"Well, kinder care was Mrs. Landsberger's idea," Grace explained. "Oh, you don't know who that is neither… she and her husband arrived about a year ago, he works for the railroad repairin' the tracks… anyway, one time we were talkin' at church about how hard it was workin' with a young one around, findin' someone to take care of them every day. Erna offered to look after the children while hers were in school. Only she don't call them children, she calls them kinder. That's German. And that's how we came up with 'kinder care'. Your mother brings Katie, and Mrs. Slicker drops off the twins sometimes to get her shopping done."

"Everything's changed so much," Colleen said quietly. Even with what her mother had written in her letters, and what Brian had shared on the train, she still didn't know everything going on. And the town itself had so many new parts to it that hadn't been there before... Andrew was right. It was almost like being a visitor rather than a native.

"Oh, Colleen, don't you go worryin' about it. You and Dr. Cook have plenty of time to catch up," Grace said, unknowingly echoing what Reverend Johnson had said a short while ago. Just then, one of the employees called for Grace's attention. "I'll be right there, Donna Mae," Grace hollered back before standing. "If you two need anythin' else, just ask."

She had turned and taken a step when a thoughtful Andrew said, "Wait, Grace."

She turned around. "You want to order somethin'?"

"Uh, no, Grace... I just want to say that I believe it's time you called me Andrew."

The older woman eyed him doubtfully. "Wouldn't that be disrespectful?"

"Tell me, Grace - if Colleen had come back here with her degree, would you be obligated to call her Dr. Cook, too?"

"Well, I- I suppose I'd be calling her Dr. Colleen. Like Dr. Mike."

"Then if it makes you more comfortable to do so, Grace, call me Dr. Andrew."

"Well, all right then… Dr. Andrew," she said, emphasizing the new moniker with a pleased smile. After giving a short, satisfactory nod at their new familiarity, Grace left them alone.

"That was so nice of you, Andrew," Colleen said, distracted from her own worries by her husband's considerate gesture.

She hadn't asked him for an explanation, but Andrew felt he should offer one. "When she called me 'Dr. Cook' a minute ago, it struck me how the other town leaders all address me informally, and I've known them just as long as Grace and Robert E." Andrew shook his head in dismay. "I should have realized how unfair it was before and said something sooner."

"You said something now, Andrew. That's what matters. You made it right."

He nodded, heartened by her support. Yes, he'd made it right with Grace. And later, when they visited the livery, he'd make it right with Robert E., too.

:

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Author's Notes:

-"Others have come here seeking the 'rest cure' for their tuberculosis" – One reason for Colorado's population growth during the late 1800s was an influx of people looking to cure their tuberculosis in the clean mountain air. The "rest cure' was just that- plenty of rest and relaxation in the fresh air of the countryside or mountains. Originally thought to be a hereditary condition, as entire families often fell ill, Dr. Robert Koch of Germany found in 1882 that TB is caused by contagious bacteria. He was awarded the Nobel Prize in Medicine for his discovery. The first vaccine was developed in 1921 by physician Albert Calmette and veterinarian Jean-Marie Camille Guerin, both of France.

-"Yes, I read about that finally getting through Congress" – On March 3, 1875, Congress passed enabling legislation giving Colorado Territory residents a path to statehood. Among the requirements was holding a convention to draft a state constitution and the setting aside of lands to build a state capital, state penitentiary, and state university (the University of Colorado, Boulder). The territorial vote on statehood would be held July 1, 1876, passing by a nearly 4-1 margin. One month later, Colorado officially became the 38th state admitted to the union.

-When I discovered that the original Colorado State constitution was printed in three languages – English, Spanish, and German – for the benefit of the local populace, I wanted to find a way to incorporate that ancestry into this story. Thus, the Colorado Springs day care being dubbed 'kinder care'. Many of the Germans settling in Colorado were Jews and Mennonites who had first immigrated to Russia, until life became too oppressive there.