A/N: Gah, I've fallen behind on these! Holidays have ruined my update schedule, so today's a plot bin day for everyone, sorry. Would anyone like an update on Christmas Eve/Christmas? If not. I'll be off.

I need to know, and quickly. So here we go. The fate of this story depends on you, the reader. Your feedback determines the fate of this tale, and many others.

As ever, I own no quotes, references, themes or memes. Not a wit or one. They're tributes, one and all.

I'm just a humble author trying to make his way in this wild world, one word at a time.

Time and feedback will determine if this should become a story. Simple as that.

In other words...everything is up to YOU, the reader. Do let me know~!

Obvious Teaser is obvious AGAIN: A Most Unlikely Berserker...

"Honest is the best policy, I find.

Sure, sure, whatever you say.

Hey!

~?

A Most Unlikely Brush

"Need help?"

Jeanne craned her neck back and refrained from smiling.

Ever since her ascension into this state -ever since her hair had become this long pale ashen white mess and her eyes a molten gold- she found her emotions a great deal more...volatile. Among other things she dare not speak of in pleasant company. A saint she may no longer but, she still had her morals, even if they were a bit looser than usual.

It was to be expected, of course. She'd forsaken one Class and become another.

But at the end of the day she was still herself.

Berserker -Naruto!- offered her the tool, still smiling. He, at least, hadn't changed, despite his ascension.

Jeanne eyed the hairbrush warily. Looked back to the mirror. Considered the ruined, tangled knots in her hair.

All her own efforts had been for naught. Jack had only made it worse.

Her brow furrowed further as she bit her lip.

Sighed, now. "Please, be gentle.

"Of course~!

Smoothly, he began with her head, nudging away bits of ash and soot. Then he started stroking away at her scalp with a care one wouldn't expect from a creature of his Class. But though his face hadn't changed, he'd ascended too, hadn't he? His skills spoke for themselves.

...was it warm in here? Or was that just her? Surely her imagination.

She focused on her reflection, refusing to look at him.

It availed her naught.

Naruto whistled while he worked at first, but soon enough his voice became a gentle hum. Once he finished with her hair she demanded he massage her shoulders. He didn't question her, not once, though he would've been well within his rights. After all, she was no longer a Ruler, and he most certainly was. He could've said no. Told her off, easily...

.

..

...but he didn't. Why was that?

Instead, he bid her to lay down before the mirror; soon enough he had her resting on her stomach, divested of her armor. His hands went to work, seeking the knots in her shoulders, then her back, lower now, lower still...so much so that she found herself biting her knuckles to restrain herself from crying out. It was just a massage. It shouldn't feel this good

But it did.

It absolutely did.

Heaven. Bliss. Pleasure.

His hands paused. "Do you want me to stop?"

She bit her fingers and shook her head furiously, pale hair thrashing behind her. "No!"

"But I'm already at your waist...

"Keep going!"

After only a moment's paused, his hands delved lower. That strong touch soon had her squirming where she lay, thighs rubbing together.

Jeanne's face began to grow warm as he continued his work.

He had her moaning in less than a minute.

A/N: We'll cut it there for now, tease though it is.

No previews this time. I'm exhausted. Aaaand there we go. As ever, reviews keep me alive. Without them, I cannot write.

So...in the Immortal Words of Atlas...Review...Would You Kindly?

Hope you enjoyed this, and may your day be filled with lots of luck!

Warm regards,

~Nz.

No previews here. Time for an old man to rest awhile.