O
ASCELPIUS
Medicine
It was the most agonising hour of Hope's life. She stopped struggling in the end and let herself go limp. Harry's restraining arm became one of comfort and solidarity instead, trying to hug her, but she shrugged him off. She did not want sympathy. She wanted to know what was happening to her mother.
"Let's go up to the cafe," Harry said. "It'll be quiet and we'll look suspicious loitering here. Please, Hope. For your mum's sake. For Teddy's sake."
He lifted the silencing charm. He might as well not have done. She did not say a word as they walked together up to the top floor and Harry sat her down at a table in the corner.
"Do you want a drink?"
Hope summoned some manners with a herculean effort. This was still Harry Potter, Head of the Auror department and hero of The Great War, after all.
"No thank you."
He brought her one anyway, and she sipped it so as not to appear rude. She was grateful that Harry did not try and make small talk, merely pulled a notepad out of his robes and started reading. She noticed that his eyes weren't moving and he barely turned the pages at all.
Eventually, after forty five minutes, Harry looked over Hope's shoulder, his eyes widening, and she turned to see her father hurrying towards them.
He sat down, cast a quick muffling charm around them, and nodded.
"It worked," he said. "She's already improving."
Harry exhaled heavily and gripped Remus's wrist in relief. For Hope, the urge to fling herself into his arms and sob was overwhelming, but a second emotion was prickling at her. He had sent her away. He had forced Harry to drag her out of the room, when her mother could have died.
He did not try and hug her either, just gave her a small smile. He must know what she was thinking.
"Won't they realise?" she whispered, pushing past the difficult moment. "What Teddy did?"
He glanced around again nervously before replying, even though there was no one within earshot.
"Almost certainly. Ten minutes after you left, Jessye suggested a drug to slow the spread of the curse, one that has been effective in some muggle trials, but she was already showing signs of improvement when they gave it to her. The timing of her recovery doesn't match the expected effect of the drug and of course, it won't account for the curse not being present in her system next time they test her. But she's definitely improving. Her breathing is stabilising on its own, even if she's not awake yet. Right now, that's all anyone cares about."
"Can we see her?"
Hope was half expecting the answer to be no, but her father nodded.
"Of course. That's why I came to get you."
He touched her arm as they got up to leave the cafe but Hope flinched away. She wasn't ready to forget what had happened an hour before, even though her conscience was screaming that there were more important matters to worry about.
Tonks was still unconscious when they entered the room, her breathing easier, her lips no longer blue. Hestia was nowhere to be seen, but Jessye was examining the little golden instrument.
"The magic levels are still falling," she said. "But she's doing better. The drug we used to manage her symptoms seems to have helped."
She smiled warmly at Hope. Healer Phennah, on the other hand, was looking very grave, and kept shooting sharp glances at Teddy. Even with the natural advantage of a metamorphmagus, Teddy had never been a good liar, and Hope could not blame Phennah for her suspicions. Her brother had discomfort and guilt written over his face.
How long they sat there, Hope wasn't sure. Her mind was a loop of racing thoughts as she imagined all that could have happened, all that could still happen. Eventually the healer put down her notes and spoke.
"We are going to run more tests," she said. "I need to ask you all to leave for the moment."
Teddy followed them out into the corridor.
"I need to stay, Dad. Hestia and Jessye are going to as well, and Gran's insisting on waiting overnight. But," he glanced anxiously at his watch, "you'll need to get home."
Remus turned to Harry as Teddy said goodbye and disappeared up a corridor to the left.
"Harry, I'll take my potion as soon as I'm back. It should be fine, but I'm later than usual, with all this. Can Hope stay with you tonight?"
"But-"
"Of course she can," Harry assured him. "Hope, come over by floo you're ready."
Hope stared between them in dismay.
"Dad-"
"You'll stay with Harry and Ginny," he said quietly. "No arguments Hope, please. Not right now."
O
Hope was bundling her overnight things into an old duffel bag when Remus came up to see how she was getting on.
"You're angry with me."
It wasn't a question. Hope knew she had no right to be thinking what she was. Knew it wasn't going to help. Knew her father was completely exhausted and probably going through the same emotion hell that she was, if not worse.
"Listen-"
"You chucked me out." Her voice cracked as the words tumbled forth. "You threw me out of the room and you silenced me and now you're making me leave the house."
Stop it. Don't be so horrible. Mum could have died and now he's had to leave her because it's the full moon and he's probably only keeping it together for your sake. Do you think for a second that if Teddy were in your position, he would be acting like this?
"Hope-"
"My whole family was in that room and you made Harry drag me away and I had no idea what was going on. And now you won't even let me stay here."
She threw a hairbrush into the bag. Oompa, not liking her violent movements, dived in after it and cowered in one of her slippers.
His reply was low and sad.
"I was trying to protect you."
"I don't need you to protect me. I can do that myself!"
Her head snapped up in time to see a peculiar expression twisting his face. She could not decipher it at all.
"You are so like your mother," he murmured at last.
But I'm not. Teddy said it all. Mum is brave and funny and popular and she risks her life every day to make our world a safer place. I'll be lucky to pass my exams at this rate and now I'm acting like the most awful person in the world because I can't even say how thankful I am she's OK, like a normal human being would.
"Please listen to me."
She met his eye again reluctantly. He looked bone-tired. And suddenly very old. She had never seen him as old before. She knew that her mother was several years younger than him, as were all the Weasley parents, and he had always looked older than his age due to his condition. But his current, almost faded appearance, as he struggled to stand without the support of the wall, was alien to her. And it was terrifying. His voice was quite steady.
"Hope, seeing someone die is a terrible, life altering thing. It can never be reversed. I was nineteen when a colleague was killed in front of me. I've never forgotten it. Harry and the Weasleys all witnessed death before the end of the war, most of them still teenagers. Neville's grandfather died just after his first year of school. And Luna saw her mother die when she was nine years old. Every single one of them would agree, and they all would have done what I did in that hospital room."
Hope did not reply. She was thinking of the thestrals; the haunted expression on her classmate's face as Hagrid explained what they were.
"As for you staying here tonight," he finished. "That is not open for discussion. You've known the reason since you were six years old."
She had.
"Harry and Ginny will be there for you," he added, as Hope zipped up her bag and threw it over her shoulder. "And I'll be here for you in the morning. We can talk then."
Just apologise. Hug him and say you're sorry and that you're glad Mum's OK and you wish you didn't have to leave but you'll see him in the morning.
He put a gentle hand on the back of her hair and kissed her forehead. She did not react. She did not say anything as she followed him down the stairs and made her way towards the fireplace.
Well done. You might as well call yourself Elodie from now on.
O
"Why do you think Hestia had the cure in the first place?"
Hope had been talking to Harry and Ginny for a long time. A wave of guilt crashed over her every time she thought of her behaviour, and her father, curled up in his wolf form, alone in the cellar, but there was nothing she could do about it now. She would try and make amends in the morning. She wasn't going to let the awkwardness stretch on for weeks like she had in her third year of school.
"I don't know," Harry said. "It's not something we were aware of, but she'll have had her reasons. I'll try and speak to her in private tomorrow."
There was a silence. They had already gone over the events of the day and the possible ramifications for Teddy multiple times. Then Hope plucked up the courage to ask the other question that had been bothering her on and off all evening.
"What did you mean by Strike Two?"
Harry gave her a sharp look.
"What?"
"Strike Two. You said it at the hospital. And Mum said Strike One, I'm sure. When she was talking about the planting of the vaccine back in the summer. What are they, these strikes? Is there going to be Strike Three?"
Harry had recovered his composure. "No, it's nothing in particular," he said vaguely. "It's just terminology we Aurors use sometimes."
Hope was convinced this was another attempt to protect her and it did not improve her mood. With difficulty, she choked down her feelings. Harry and Ginny had been so kind all evening and being unpleasant never got her anywhere.
"I think I'll go to bed," she said, pushing back her chair. "Thanks for having me."
Ginny got up too and hugged her tightly, arms warm and compassionate, and for a split second Hope wondered if she was going to break down completely. The moment passed even as she acknowledged the temptation to succumb to tears. She wouldn't cry. Not now.
"You're to come and get me if you need anything tonight, OK?" Ginny said, releasing her.
Outward calm restored, Hope went upstairs to Lily's room, where her bed for the evening was waiting. She was instantly comforted by the familiar floral smell and the feel of the soft fur blankets on the bed. Wishing she'd brought Fluffy, she took Lily's giant stuffed frog down from the shelf, held it tight against her chest and curled up under the covers.
She barely slept at all and was wide awake by five o'clock. Still feeling guilty from the night before, she pulled on her clothes, scribbled a quick note of thanks to Harry and Ginny, and made her way back through the floo.
A scrap of paper lay on the table in the kitchen. Hope recognised the feather shaped parchment at once, used only by the remaining members of the Order of the Phoenix. The Order may not operate officially any more, but a unique, golden thread of trust and solidarity still connected them and always would. The note was brief.
She's doing much better. Awake. Visiting allowed until 6pm. HJ
Breathing a further sigh of relief, she started round the kitchen, shoving some ingredients in the bread-baker and putting on the kettle, pausing only when the hoarse voice came from the doorway.
"You're home early."
She turned. He looked so unwell, despite the tired smile, and her stomach spasmed in sudden panic. She had never quite been able to forget the worries that had plagued her since the age of ten, the fear that her father's life expectancy was being whittled away, slowly but surely, with every full moon.
She hovered, wanting to do help him, but he did not seem bothered by his own state. He read Hestia's note, his own face relaxing, then sank down onto a chair at the kitchen table.
"Please sit down. I need to say something."
Hope hesitated, then did as she was told.
"I'm sorry."
She had not been expecting that, and it did nothing to ease her feelings of culpability. She was the one who should be apologising, surely.
"I'm sorry that what I did yesterday upset you," he elaborated. "I truly am. I know it is difficult to be made to feel you are too young to understand. Sometimes parents do make mistakes, in trying to shield their children from every possible harm that could ever come to them. But in this instance, I believe that what I did yesterday was right. Teddy had minutes to do what was necessary and you know what the consequences might have been. Maybe I could have handled it better, and I am sorry you were upset, but I am never going to apologise for wanting to protect you."
Hope acknowledged this with a tiny jerk of the head.
"You're my daughter," he finished, softness and affection evident in every syllable. "There will not be a single day, while I still walk this earth, when I don't try to protect you."
Hope said nothing. What was there a suitable reply to such a statement? He reached out and took her hand, and she did not pull away. "Hope, this has been a terrible few hours. It's OK to be upset. To let stuff out. I didn't, you know. For years and years I kept every emotion bottled up inside. Many would say I still do," he added wryly. "But I assure you I'm better than I used to be. And I'm telling you, it's alright to be upset. I'm here, for that. You don't need to hide how you feel."
For the third time in the space of twelve hours Hope wanted to break down, sob and be comforted like a child. The tears threatened to prickle as the lines in her father's face creased with concern and sympathy that she didn't feel she deserved.
She forced them back. Eyes bright. Skin clear. Positive expression.
Suit of armour.
"I'm alright Dad, honest. Just relieved Mum's OK."
He did not believe her, she knew, but he did not insist.
"You and me both."
There was a silence.
"Come here." She felt soothed as he pulled her towards him and she breathed in the familiar scent of his clothes, knowing there really were no ill feelings from her attitude the night before.
You could still apologise. It doesn't change the fact that you were an arsehole.
"Do you want a cup of tea?" she mumbled.
Did actions really speak louder than words? She wasn't so sure. But his tone of voice on accepting told her he understood.
o
o
After a number of overnight tests, the Healers concluded that The Crow's spell was not designed to be permanent, and that Tonks' MDI would recover itself naturally over the coming weeks. A relief not only from a medical point of view but also from a political one as it limited the damage that could be done through blackmail. Kinglsey called a meeting with Harry and Hestia that morning and informed them that he had requested the autopsy details for the wizards who had died overseas, to examine the similarities between their illnesses and Tonks'.
"I suspect," he said, "If I've understood all Hestia and Claire Twyer have told me, that their recorded MDI's on moment of death will be less than thirty. The symptoms of the curse would have taken over before the spell had a chance to fade from their system. Tragically they had no access to a cure even if they had realised what was happening."
"Thank goodness you had it on you," Harry muttered to Hestia. He felt sick every time he thought of the alternative, and the devastation that would have hit the Lupin family if Hestia had not had both the foresight and force of nature to insist that a portion of the cure be kept aside for her personal study. His relief was mirrored in her own expression.
"Tonks would have died last night without that cure Kinglsey," she said. "Of that, I'm certain."
"Then whatever the fall out, I consider it a price worth paying."
He offered no further comment on Tonks, but the shadows in his already black eyes spoke volumes.
"Our next steps," he continued, more business-like, reaching for a long piece of parchment and consulting it, "are to manage the inevitable repercussions as discreetly as we can. Regarding Teddy Lupin, I regret there is nothing I can do to prevent a disciplinary hearing if Healer Phennah reports his indiscretion to the hospital board. It will need to go through official proceedings over which I have no control."
"Teddy knew the risks," Harry said at once. "He'd do the same again if it meant saving his mother."
"We will need to address the issue of how he was in possession of the cure -" Kinglsey's forehead creased. "He cannot be allowed to take the fall for that - it would mean instant dismissal."
"We've got time to give that some thought," Hestia assured him. "If Phennah does submit a report they will first suspend his work permit but he will not be required to comment until the hearing is set. I'll remind him of his rights as soon as I can."
"Thank you. Next, what is our course of action if Phennah reports either of you?" Kinglsey went on. "She will know that Teddy could not have procured the cure on his own."
Harry had know this was coming too, and that the most likely suspects for giving Teddy the banned cure would be the Head of the Auror department or a long standing Healer with top level access privileges, which would bring the spotlight onto them. Like Teddy, he would do the same again in a heartbeat to save Tonks, but the thought of having to fight for his own position at this crucial time in wizarding politics was not inviting.
"I don't think she will report either of us," Hestia said. "She will be concerned about her job security, and therefore Teddy is likely to come under scrutiny. But she is a kind woman and will not want to cause more upset than necessary at this crucial time. I may be wrong, and if we're dismissed, we will have to find a way to work underground. We've done it before and Jessye and I have been doing it for months anyway."
"Indeed," Kinglsey nodded. "And speaking of which. How is the situation progressing?"
He knew there had been some advances in Hestia and Jessye's experimentation with the banned cure since the summer, but had refrained from asking in depth questions. The less he knew the better. In light of yesterday's events, it now seemed prudent to obtain a more concrete update, and Hestia's was visibly triumphant in face of the question.
"We were saying only last week that we might be nearly there," she said. "I'm almost certain that we have separated the toxic elements from the healing properties of the cure. And now-" Further jubilation was evident on her normally stolid features. "As horrific as it is that Tonks nearly died, you can see the silver lining, I'm sure."
"You have a test subject who has received The Crow's cure," Kinglsey replied. "One who we know and trust, and who will no doubt be willing for you to run further diagnostic tests to determine the long term effects within the body."
"Exactly."
There was no doubt that Tonks would be happy to submit herself for all sorts of testing if there was a chance of it informing a permanent cure. The only issue in Harry's opinion would be preventing her from getting too involved and further damaging her recently compromised health. And he still had a nagging worry on that subject.
"What about," he swallowed, "the cure's potential side effects on Tonks when her MDI is back to full strength?"
The worry that no one had voiced but that was on Kinglsey's mind as well. If Zar serum was the sole reason for the planted cure's lethality to wizardkind - as Hestia suspected - then by the time Tonks' MDI regained its former levels, the substance would no longer be live in the body to react with the magic and cause harm. If there were other dangerous ingredients lurking, hitherto undetected, then the nightmare may not be over.
Hestia's did her best to reassure her comrades, reminding them that Tonks would undergo extensive testing for the next few days. "I know you're worried," she added. "But I have thought all along that Zar serum was the only toxic factor here, and no research we have done has suggested otherwise. I truly believe no lasting damage will be done. Alterations to Tonks' blood magene should also reverse themselves once her MDI kicks in again."
Unable to bear thinking of the alternative, Harry turned the discussion The Crow, his motives, his intentions, and the complicated web of manipulation and mind games they were now embroiled in.
"So has the The Crow been zipping around the world stripping wizards of their powers at random, or is there a logic behind his targets?" Hestia mused. "A witch in China, an old wizard in South Africa, two twenty-year olds in the States, and Tonks. Five different victims with no connections at all."
"Five that we know of," Harry reminded her. "There could be many more, undocumented."
"Tonks was specifically targeted," Hestia pressed on. "With that fake memo from Savage. Was that the same for the other victims?"
Kinglsey shook his head. "No official information on that at the moment. If they were targeted for a specific reason, then their job titles and statuses give no indication as to what."
"Working theory number one, then," Hestia said,. "The Crow has been testing his newest development on a number of victims, as widespread as he can. He curses a sample of magical people, unsure whether they are carrying the curse or not. Once reports start coming in that afflicted wizards are dying the way he intends, he targets one high profile case - a senior member of the British Auror department who he knows has the curse in their blood - with the intent of using them as an example and blackmailing governments across the world, as Harry said yesterday in the hospital."
By and large, Kinglsey agreed that this theory was solid, while Harry was quick to find the flaw. "How would he know that Tonks was afflicted with the Curse?"
"The St Mungo's testing register."
"That's not public knowledge. There's no way he could-"
He tailed off as Hestia and Kinglsey made eye contact across the table, acknowledging that the time had come to tell Harry the suspicions they had discussed two months previously. The concern that there had been - and maybe still was - a spy in St Mungo's.
o
o
"Remus, for god's sake go home and get some sleep."
Tonks was much better, no doubt about that, even if she was still pale and the colour had not returned to her hair. Her MDI had stopped falling and was hovering around thirty-five. While no one voiced what this meant, Hope knew she was not the only one torturing herself with the alternative consequences, had the cure not been available to them. Phennah had finished her shift, which was a relief. Hope had a nasty feeling the healer knew exactly what had happened after she'd left the room the day before.
"I'm fine," Remus insisted, sinking onto the chair next to the bed. "I want to make sure you're alright."
She glared at him.
"I am alright. I'm feeling loads better and you will be alerted immediately should that change. You have no right to worry about me when you look like that. Please Remus, go home."
After twenty more minutes in this vein, Remus allowed his daughter to escort him home. He refused to go to bed, and instead went to sleep on the sofa, insisting that she was to wake him should anything be amiss. Hope stayed in the armchair next to him, pretending to read a book but in reality replaying in her head the events of the day before and every way in which she had failed to act the way Teddy would have done.
Harry paid them a visit many hours later, when Remus was finally awake again and looking more human, having managed to stomach a bowl of soup.
"How are you doing?" Harry asked him, the second he was out of the fireplace.
He nodded.
"Fine thank you. Much better now."
Harry eyed him narrowly and then turned to Hope.
"And you?"
"All good." She made her eyes bright and forced a tight smile.
Harry raised his eyes skywards and muttered something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like "Lupins", before his tone became more business-like. "These are from Ginny," he said, holding out an enourmous tin. "Chocolate brownies. She said you are to eat them until you feel better or at least until you can't look at chocolate anymore. No arguments."
Hope did manage a proper grin at this, as she took the tin with a word of thanks and inspected the contents, realising she was hungry for the first time in hours.
"And," Harry continued, with a meaningful glance at Remus. "I managed to speak to Hestia and Kingsley in private."
Remus sat up straighter. "Did they explain why she had the cure?"
"Yes." Harry looked at Hope and she prepared herself to be sent away, resolving that this time, instead of flying off the handle, she would calmly leave the room with what little dignity she had left.
"I know. Adult stuff," she said, taking several brownies and getting to her feet. "It's fine."
"I'll talk to you after, Hope," Remus said as Harry flashed her a grateful smile.
"Yeah, I said, it's fine."
"Is it fine?" Harry wondered aloud, sinking down into the chair opposite Remus and firing a quick Muffliato towards the door that Hope had just shut behind her. "That's a loaded word if ever there was one."
Remus rested his head on the cushions behind him.
"She was furious with me last night, but we patched it up this morning. She's been quiet today. It's hard to tell what she's really thinking. And there is no need," he added, more loudly, "for you to comment on who she gets it from. I do not need reminding of the undesirable traits I have passed down to my children."
"I hope you also don't need reminding of the beautiful job you're doing to raise them." Harry retorted, recognising the warning signs that Remus was about to embark on a torrent of self-flagellation. "Don't start on that vein Remus. I can rebut your arguments all evening if I have to."
"Alright, point taken." Remus had no desire to start a row with his head pounding like a drum. "Update me. Why did Hestia have the cure?"
"Right." Agitated, Harry got up again. "It was partly as she explained back at the hospital, simply because she felt there might be a need for it. She was right, and thank goodness she had it. We'd never have got our hands on it in time otherwise. But there is another reason."
He paced up and down in front of the fireplace, explaining what Hestia and Kinglsey had told to him previously, how Jessye had become suspicious of the continuous links between the curse test results and the magienetics research, how she had confided in Hestia, and how Hestia had agreed that the suspicions were noteworthy.
"Then, when it became apparent that the cure transferred to hospitals around the world was dangerous to someone with magical make up, functioning in the opposite way to the curse itself, Jessye wanted to investigate, to see if she could identify further patterns. She and Hestia were also convinced that the tainted cure was the key to finding a safe, workable cure for everyone, but worldwide wizarding community had ruled that it be locked away until further notice."
Harry was grinning, but there was little amusement in there.
"When have rules ever stopped us before? Order mentality, as Hestia said. She spoke to Kingsley. Kingsley took some convincing, but eventually agreed to engineer a situation in which they could procure a small amount to work from. He allowed the rumour to spread that some had gone missing, to keep wizards on the alert, while making a public – and truthful– statement that every bit of it was accounted for. We knew nothing of this plan ourselves, of course. Hestia and Jessye have been studying it in secret ever since."
"And?"
There was no grin on Harry's face now.
"There are some positives. They are making serious progress towards a safe cure, which is excellent news. But as to the similarities between st Mungo's research and the cure, they've concluded it can't be a coincidence. It just can't be. The development of this Narcoviral curse, and its so-called 'cure', didn't run in parallel to worldwide advances in magical genetic study. It used St Mungo's data all the way through its development."
"But that means..." Remus was staring at Harry in horror. "You're saying that someone from St Mungo's was actually involved? There was a spy in the hospital?"
Harry finally sat down properly and ran a despairing hand through his black hair. "I don't want to believe it," he said. "Right now I don't see any other explanation. As Hestia pointed out this morning, look at what happened with Tonks. How would The Crow know who to target, if he didn't have the information on which Aurors had tested positive for the curse?"
"They're still there, then?" Remus said. "A member of the St Mungo's team is a spy for The Crow?"
Harry spread his hands despondently.
"So we believe. It will be hard - if not impossible - to work out who. They've been working flat out for months; we can't go in and start asking difficult questions that may raise suspicions and turn people against each other. It would destroy what little staff morale remains. Kingsley's going to tighten security measures even further within the hospital but even then it's not guaranteed to get us anywhere. Our best chance is to catch The Crow himself."
"Do you have any news on him? Yesterday you thought he used this magical dampening spell for blackmail. Are you expecting another hologram?"
At this, Harry did brighten.
"I didn't want to speak about this in the hospital," he said. "But The Crow's strike didn't go perfectly for him either this time. His initial intention may have been blackmail, but Tonks played him at his own game. I don't think he wants to draw attention to himself at the moment."
He launched into further explanation about Tonks' stinging hex and the empty threat of a tracker. Remus understood the implications of this in an instant.
"So he doesn't know that you weren't planning this all along and that you haven't found a way to monitor his every move."
"Those who experiment with the furthest boundaries of magic are always acutely aware that others may do the same," Harry said, conscious that this was a phrase very like Dumbledore might have used, once upon a time. "Tonks wanted to make him worry, and she seems to have succeeded."
Pure admiration was evident in his tone. "Quite ingenious, your wife. Quickest thinker I've ever known."
Remus let out a hollow laugh.
"You don't need to tell me that, believe me! So you reckon that will stop The Crow doing anything for the moment?"
"Here's hoping," Harry said. "Not indefinitely. He'll realise eventually that we don't have tabs on him. But time is precious right now and Tonks has bought us some."
"It's not over though."
"It's not over," Harry agreed. "You can be sure of that."
O
Once Harry had left, Remus relayed to Hope a few snippets of their conversation, and she accepted that it was all the information she was going to get for the time being. Her mother had done some extremely quick thinking when faced with The Crow, an action that was likely to save lives in the future. There was reason to be optimistic for a safe, workable cure. But the dangers were not over and she should still be on the alert. They would be able to visit Tonks one more time the following day, then Harry would accompany Hope back to school on Monday morning.
School. An utterly unthinkable prospect. It was surreal that she had been there on Friday, attending lessons as usual, messing up her potions assignment, assuming that Elodie Carmichael was going to be her biggest worry of the day. The idea of going back so soon brought acid to her throat.
She made an effort over the following twenty-four hours, helping her father around the house in what she hoped was a means of showing him she still felt bad about her attitude the night of the full moon. It was a relief to see her mother looking considerably better on Sunday morning, with her MDI now on the rise. St Mungo's felt even grimmer than before, with extra security checks now in place at every turn. Hope did manage to catch up with Teddy and Victoire at lunchtime, and was touched by the warm embrace that Victoire bestowed on her.
"You poor thing," Vic said, a slight break in her voice. "You've all had a rough couple of days. You must be shattered."
Victoire looked shattered herself at the moment, with dark shadows under her eyes and a lankness to her normally vibrant hair. She did not utter a word of complaint, and Hope was too polite to ask, but when she was talking to Teddy after dinner he explained.
"She's stressed because she's been assigned her new mentor for the next placement round," he said. "Unfortunately she's been given Green. Horrible woman. Everyone hates her. And this is the longest stretch without changing mentor, so she'll have her from now until May. It is a blow, to be honest. I'm trying to lift Vic's morale, but I can't think of many good things to say about Green."
"Oh." If even Teddy couldn't be positive about the woman, Hope supposed she must be bad. "Can't she request a swap?"
"Only in exceptional circumstances. 'I've heard the woman is a cow' doesn't count, sadly."
"Oh."
"She'll be fine," Teddy added. "It's just not the news she was hoping for."
"And does she know... about...?" Hope couldn't bring herself to mention the indiscretion out loud.
"No," Teddy said. "I didn't want to add to her anxieties today. I'll tell her soon though - I can't keep it from her long term."
Hope digested this without asking further questions, and the two of them listened to a comedy show on the wireless for an hour until Hope knew, with reluctance, that it was time for bed.
All too soon, Harry was dropping her back in Flitwick's office the next morning. It was exactly how they had left it, right down to Flitwick's sympathetic and concerned expression, and the droplets of water trickling down the windows as the drizzle outside intensified.
"I've had a word with the girls in your dormitory," Flitwick said to Hope. "No details, of course, but I told them you had a family emergency and have requested they ask you no questions unless you chose to tell them yourself."
The words, while demonstrating nothing but kindness from her Head of House, brought Hope to the brink of tears yet again. That he should feel he needed to act as mediator between her and her roommates, no doubt aware of their fractious relationship, and that she was not on good enough terms with them to willingly tell them all that had transpired since her departure on Friday.
He must think you're such a pathetic loser.
"Thank you, Professor. I appreciate that."
She maintained her composure - what else was new? - said her goodbyes and thanks to Harry, and headed down to Herbology, cheered up a fraction by the thought of working with Michael and Esme, but still wishing she could run away and hide in the toilets for several hours. And then, out of nowhere, came a reason to lift her mood. Adam came hurrying across the hall as she rounded the final turn in the staircase. He almost bumped right into her, did a double take before his face split into a wide smile.
"You're back!" he said. "You were away this weekend, weren't you?"
"Err, yeah," Hope replied. Had Adam actually noticed her absence? "My - my mum was in hospital. She's OK now." The addition was a hasty preempting of any emotional wobble that might encroach, but to her intense relief Adam's presence was warding off the urge to cry that had been plaguing her since Flitwick's office. His face fell at her words nonetheless.
"Oh wow. I'm - I'm sorry." He reached out to present her with an awkward pat on the shoulder, which Hope received with as much thrill as if it had been a fierce embrace. "Um - are you OK?"
"Yeah," she said. "Yeah, it was a shock. But... I'm OK."
And she realised, as she went on her way, that for the first time in three days, the statement about her wellbeing felt like the truth.
O
Tonks was discharged from hospital a week later, her MDI finally at eighty and her energy renewed. Harry insisted on signing her off until December, after which she would embark on a phased return. She did not appreciate the mollycoddling, but put up with it on the basis that, for now, she had an important role to play in events. Hestia had explained the situation in full, and Tonks was eager to assist with the testing as much as required.
"Are you sure you're OK to do this?" Remus said, after she had an early dinner, dressed in loose clothing, and was making final preparations to depart for Hestia's. She detected his concern at once and paused while searching for her cloak.
"Remus, I'll be fine. If Hestia can't be trusted, who can?"
"I do trust her. You know that."
Aside from his parents, Hestia was one of the first adults he recalled from childhood, and never would he forget the care and compassion she had shown towards him, the terrified five year old whose arm had been mangled and whose life had just been changed forever.
"But?"
His jaw was clenching. She didn't really need to ask. Had known this was coming. As it always did when there was a near miss with her health or safety. Intensified concern. Close watch on her every movement. A reluctance even to see her leave through the front door. And what, once upon a time, had irritated her and triggered resentment of his overprotective ways, now could only incite a surge in affection. For when the roles were reversed she was exactly the same. In their otherwise harmonious relationship, the secret battle of who was allowed to worry more about the other raged on.
She still hadn't put on her cloak.
"I know it must have been awful for you," she whispered.
"That moment," he admitted, voice hoarser than usual. "When Teddy had given you the medicine and I could only watch - and - and wait- and-"
She cut him off by wrapping her arms around his middle and pressing her face into his chest.
"I know. I know."
His hands gripped the sides of her arms, perhaps in an attempt to reassure himself that she was truly standing before him, that her recovery and return to the house was not a hallucination brought on by lack of sleep.
"I know," she said, for the third time. "But Remus, I'm better. I'm one hundred percent fine, minus a few MDI increments. I'll be damned if some scrawny, waxy faced little ferret is the reason I go down. And now I can finally be useful. If I'm the only known person to have received the cure, I might be the only person who can help with this. In the world."
This last sentence was said jauntily, an effort to inject humour into the matter that was so heartbreakingly unamusing, and she could see it had worked a touch. His mouth twitched.
"You do like to flatter yourself, Auror Lupin."
He was smiling now, brushing a stray curl out of her eyes. It had been a relief to witness the pink tinge reappearing two days previously, and now most of her head was back to its preferred shade of bubblegum. Her arms extracted themselves from their current position to snake up around his neck instead, pulling him forward to kiss him.
"I love you."
"I love you too. Always."
He kissed her again.
"Go on then, one-of-a-kind lab rat. Go and change the world."
O
Tonks could only be impressed by the work area Hestia and Jessye had set up for themselves. Vials of colour coded solutions lined the walls. Impeccably filed test results were stacked in the cabinet in the corner. Protective diamond glass encased the sample of liquid that Kinglsey had so craftily managed to procure for them. They had been testing a minuscule amount at a time, following the same string of safety measures without exception.
Jessye explained in her soft, calm tones what they planned to do. They would take blood, hair and saliva samples, and run a number of painless diagnostic and genetic sequencing tests, all with the intent of determining whether The Crow's cure had induced effects that weren't obvious.
"If you feel uncomfortable at any point, say the word and we'll stop," Jessye finished. "Teddy won't be happy with me if we run you into the ground twenty-four hours after leaving hospital."
"I will be fine with all of it Jessye, but thank you for being so considerate." Tonks had already rolled up her sleeves. "What's first?"
It really wasn't a bad way to spend an evening, truth be told. The atmosphere was relaxed, considering the amount at stake, and the conversation pleasant. Tonks considered it preferable to being cooped up in a stuffy office with Bentley's moods and colleagues who treated her like a rabies-infested dog.
"Remus alright?" Hestia enquired, dropping two of Tonks' hairs into a vial of violet liquid and holding it up to the light to inspect. Tonks wrinkled her nose.
"Oh, you know what Remus is like. Suffer in silence, come what may. Considering I nearly died, Hope's ups and downs, the full moon, and the fact that his son may soon be out of a job, I'd say he could be worse." Jessye traced her wand over her wrist, and she twitched at the odd sensation of blood leaving her veins. "Speaking of - I don't suppose either of you have news on Teddy?"
"No reports so far," Jessye said.
"Only a matter of time, I suppose. Phennah was probably waiting to see if I survived first."
"Oh Tonks, don't say that."
"It's a realistic assumption," Hestia sighed. "If you had died, Phennah may not have had the heart to turn in a young man who had just lost his mother. Now, as you're - thank Merlin - better, the dynamic of the situation shifts. Scrutiny of your records that night will show discrepancies and Phennah's neck will be on the line if she can't provide answers."
"I suppose there's no point fretting for now."
"Indeed. Here." Hestia dumped an enormous bowl of chocolate and sweets in front of Tonks. "Eat as much of this as you can. We need to see if your blood sugar is working as it should."
Really not a bad evening, Tonks thought, choosing the biggest jelly slug she could find in the bowl and biting its head clean off.
O
Hestia was strict about time, insisting that two and a half hours was quite enough for an evening, but that they could do more tests the following day if Tonks was willing. Which she was. Every prick of the needle felt like one step closer to beating The Crow for good, every drop of blood given a tiny piece of personal revenge. She still didn't protest at the calling it a night - she was exhausted.
"It's staggering, the amount of work they've managed to do on top of their regular jobs," she told Remus, once home and relishing the comfort of her own bed. He held her tight against him, still needing reassurance that she was OK.
"It it true they are close to a cure?"
"Very close. Although they keep finding more tests to run - officially announcing that it is safe is a huge responsibility. The even trickier thing will be proceeding with it when they're ready."
"Yes," Remus mused. "How do you admit to the world's most powerful wizards that you have produced a cure that could save millions, without provoking the inevitable punishment of going against international law?"
An unexpected progression in this topic came only six days later, with the arrival of Harry to Hestia's house. Hestia and Jessye had nearly completed the list of tests they planned to conduct on Tonks, news that Harry took with mixed emotions.
"Taking it easy, as per instructions, I see," he grumbled. She scowled back at him.
"I had to help, and you said yourself the sooner these tests were done the better."
"I didn't mean for six days straight following your discharge from hospital."
He didn't sound too annoyed. Tonks had a feeling he had more important things on his mind at the moment, and she pressed that to her advantage.
"You've got an update?"
"You aren't going to believe this," he said, sinking onto a chair by Hestia's desk. "There's been a development."
"Uh-oh."
"Not necessarily a bad one. Definitely interesting. Have you heard of Professor Cortez?"
Jessye and Tonks were none the wiser, but Hestia nodded.
"The healer in America?"
"That's the one. News has come through today that he's been doing the same as you and Jessye for the past two months: procured some of the cure in secret and worked on it ever since in his secret mountain hideaway."
"Oh wait," Tonks interjected. "Cortez is that nut job from Colorado? The one who experimented with deliberate splinching back in the nineties?"
"He is a tad eccentric," Hestia agreed. "Brilliant mind though. I've read - and used - a number of his papers."
"I'd say nut job is accurate," Harry admitted. "He's been testing the cure on himself with no assistance. Call him what you like though - the bottom line is, he believes he's succeeded. With a cure that is safe for all."
It was almost possible to hear the individual components of the silence that followed: doubts, hope, jubilation, a nagging worry that this was a trap all over again. Tonks was the first to speak.
"Hang on, does this mean I've been poked, prodded and sampled all week for no reason?"
Her eyes were sparkling with jest but Jessye looked exhilarated.
"The opposite," she breathed. "If this is really true then we need to collaborate. Compare results. See if they match. Testing you is crucial, if Cortez has only been testing on himself. This could be the final confirmation that Hestia and I have been hoping for."
"Agreed," Harry said. "We are going to hold off on reaching out for the time being though."
"Why?"
Hestia had already understood.
"To see how they punish Cortez for going against international wizarding law."
"Exactly," Harry said. "He's come forward of his own volition so let's see how they react to the development. Let the dust settle and go from there. I'm not having any of you sent to Azkaban."
Harry wanted to depart back for the Ministry the second he had delivered this message, but between the three women they convinced him to relax for a moment.
"You cannot lecture all your staff day in day out about taking breaks and never have one yourself," Tonks said sternly. "For God sake, sit down and have a glass of wine. It's for testing purposes," she added, when Harry raised his eyebrows at the bottle she was brandishing in front of his nose. "Had to see how I reacted to alcohol, and as I'm fine there's no point wasting the rest - have some."
Harry agreed to stay for twenty minutes, although refused to touch the wine, accepting a cup of coffee instead. Tonks studied him as he sipped it, deep in conversation with Jessye about potential differences between their cure and Cortez's. There were some greys at his temples and a few lines under his eyes, but he wasn't looking bad, for a Head Auror in a worldwide health crisis. Perhaps surviving attempted murder as a one year old and saving the world five times before you turned of age gave you heightened stress tolerance.
"Right, I really must get on," Harry said at last, putting his half drunk mug aside and getting to his feet. "I'll keep you updated. No word about this to anyone please, for the moment. And you-" he pointed an accusing finger at Tonks, who rolled her eyes, knowing what was coming. "Take. It. Easy."
"Yeah, yeah."
"I mean it. Or do I need to get Remus involved with monitoring your recuperation?"
An uninviting prospect, Tonks had to admit. Hestia assured Harry there would be no need, as the tests would be finished that day anyway, and the remainder of the evening was spent in animated discussion about Cortez and his latest experiment.
O
The eponymous term Cortez Dilemma would be used for years to come. What was the appropriate sanction for widespread and flagrant disregard of wizarding law, when no one had been hurt and the consequence of said transgression was likely to be hundreds of thousands of lives spared in the future?
The initial Cortez debate lasted a mere ten days. A record for any case of this nature, but every member of the International Confederation agreed that time was of the essence and each day wasted meant thousands more lives put at risk. By day two, even while the fate of Cortez was being debated by the jury, his cure was undergoing stringent testing in magical laboratories across the world.
On day six, Kinglsey sent word from Brussels that their own role in events was now known. What's more, they were not the only ones to have gone against the ruling with the hope of achieving a cure - at least five other representatives from different countries had owned up to doing the same. While this complicated the debate, it shared the responsibility of the transgression, making it less likely that individuals would face severe consequences. It also strengthened the research behind a safe cure.
By day eight, Higgs was pestering Harry hourly for updates. He had only recently been told of the suspicions of a spy in St Mungo's. Displeased at being left in the dark for so long, it appeared he was not willing to leave anything else to chance.
"He's doing my head in," Harry growled to Tonks. She was not back in work officially but had come into the office to touch base. "I didn't even know about this bloody spy until three weeks ago. He's taken it personally."
"You and Higgs butting heads isn't exactly new is it," Tonks laughed.
"True." Privately, Harry thought that Terrence Higgs had never forgiven him for beating him to the snitch in his first ever quidditch match at school. "But I've never had to work with him this closely for this long before. They'd better sort this Cortez business out soon."
On day ten, the official decision was made. Professor Cortez, due to his undeniable role in producing a safe antidote to the Narcoviral Curse, would not receive a punishment for procuring the dangerous substance in the first place. Neither, therefore, would any delegate or civilian who had acted in a similar way. The cure would now be trialled on magical people across the world, and some fragments of hope had been restored.
O
Teddy had known it was only a matter of time. He had told himself that he had taken the only possible option available to him in the moment. His mother was safe and well, therefor he had no regrets. He was prepared for the fall out when it came.
When the official confirmation arrived in the form of a brief conversation with his line manager, followed by an official note requesting that he suspend his work until further notice, he knew he had been wrong about that last. Prepared he was not. Victoire and Jessye found him first, sitting with his head in his hands in his cubicle, eyes screwed up against the weight of the news and what it meant for his future and his ambitions.
"Oh Teddy." Victoire's arms were round him within seconds, understanding dawning as she saw the envelope sitting next to him. Jessye retreated with discretion. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I was hoping..."
She didn't finish the sentence.
"You did the right thing." She forced him to look at her, love, affection and sympathy amalgamating in her vivid blue gaze. "You know that."
"I know."
Teddy knew it could not have been any other way. That life without his mother - and his father's life without her - was unimaginable, and the potential loss of his job was a drop in the ocean in comparison. Yet that did not ease the burning ambition inside him to do what no wizard had managed to do - find a permanent treatment for Lycanthropy. Nor did it extinguish the desolate feeling that came with the demise of said opportunity.
He said as much to his father that evening.
"It's not that I regret what I did, please don't think that," Teddy implored, and Remus's instant gesture told him that had not even crossed his mind. "I know there was no other choice. I guess I just keep thinking... If only... it could have been done differently."
Remus's mouth twisted ever so slightly.
"If only," he murmured. "Two of the most dangerous words I know. They'll tear you apart, if you let them. Drive you to insanity. Torture you with alternatives that have never existed and never will."
Teddy could hear the rawness of personal experience behind the words.
"I spent a lot of my life saying them to myself," his father acknowledged. "If only I'd never been bitten. If only no one cared that I was a werewolf. If only I had more money. The list went on and on. And when it wasn't 'if only', it was 'what if'. What if I never got a job again. What if life never got better. What if I bit someone and unleashed this hell on another soul."
He had got a job again, Teddy tried to remind himself. Life had got better for him. And he would never bite anyone, that was certain. Those situations that were most dreaded didn't necessarily have to come to pass.
"Here's the thing about 'what if'," Remus continued. "The positives. 'If only' dwells on a past that can't be changed. 'What if' looks to the future and can inspire possibility. For example, what if you hadn't given your mother the cure in that hospital room? We both know the answer to that, and it is unthinkable. What if, by doing what you did, you've completely changed the course of the fight against The Crow and The Curse? What if this time away from your job now gives you a different perspective and allows you to come back stronger? What if, despite the pain you are going through now, it all turns out OK?"
Worrying means you suffer twice. The words popped into Teddy's head very suddenly. A quote from Newt Scamander, it was etched in the wall of the Hufflepuff common room, and he had passed by it every day during his school years. They were words he always strove to live by, difficult though it could be. He tried to articulate this to Remus, who smiled ruefully.
"Don't I know it," he murmured. "Please don't think I'm making light of your troubles. I know that you can't turn off stress and worry like a switch, no matter how many sensible words are thrown your way. But Teddy, you know how proud we are of your work. Not to mention grateful for what you did last month. I realise nothing I say right now is going to lesson the disappointment if you lose this job. But whatever happens, you will find a way forward and you will come back stronger. I believe that without a shadow of a doubt."
As tempting as it was to think 'but what if I don't', the sensible conversation had lifted Teddy's morale and galvanised his resolve. Neither if only, or what if were options here. He would come back stronger.
He had to.
o