Solas hesitated before knocking on the door of Inquisitor's quarters. She was always the one seeking him out. Crossing the threshold of her private space was not something he felt was a prudent thing to do. This time he had some news for her, and he found himself impatient to share it. That was… an unusual feeling. For a mind that has endured for thousands and thousands of years urgency was a matter of perspective. In a way, she made him feel new, existing in the moment instead of anchored by millenia past.

She made him feel many things he didn't think possible.

It was selfish, it was wrong, and yet here he was standing at her door, frozen in the moment of indecision. Solas the elven apostate and Fade expect would have no reason to hesitate. He came to enjoy this guise quite a lot. It was him, but stripped of all the guilt and regret and responsibility, and so it was too easy to fall into and forget who he was outside of it. And that was something he had no right to do.

It would be more prudent to leave and wait for her to come to him, then he could share what he's learned.

He didn't get a chance. The door flew open, nearly hitting him in the process.

"Solas!" Ellana was on the other side, clearly heading out somewhere. "I'm sorry, I didn't hit you, did I? Were you coming to see me?"

"I… Yes. Do you have a moment?" What else could he say? No, I was just here admiring your door?

"Of course," she let him through and closed the door behind them.

The room was a mess. It wasn't untidy, per se. The servants would come and clean up regularly. It just wasn't a place someone lived in. He doubted she slept in the bed, judging by how it was turned into just another surface for books and scrolls when the table overflowed. There was a stack of books in the chair as well. The balcony door was open, letting in the crisp mountain air. He could hear the wind howling.

"I sleep up there, if you're wondering," she supplied, amused at his reaction, and nodded at the second level. "Down here is too open."

He nodded. Of course a Dalish would rather find a smaller, safer place to sleep where they could see everyone coming.

"Come sit by the fire?"

"No, thank you. You were about to go somewhere, I did not mean to distract you from your duties."

"You did come to my door," Ellana reminded him, but also remained standing. They haven't really talked since Adamant. Since the Fade. Was it his imagination, or was she keeping a distance from him since then? "I thought you'd be working on another mural right now."

"I did come to your door," Solas echoed with a smile. Perhaps that was it. She thought he was busy, and wasn't at all suspicious after that demon all but called him by his other name. But that was probably wishful thinking. Her sharp inquiring mind was one of the things he loved about her, after all. What he had to tell her, however, had a good chance of redirecting that mind to something entirely different. "I have something for you."

"Oh?"

"When we first came to Skyhold, you told me about the previous Inquisitor, Ameridan. I've since made some inquiries on behalf of the Inquisition," he said, leaving out the part where appropriate people had to be gently encouraged to pursue the right course by his agents. Ellana's face took on a wary expression. "Lately I've been corresponding with a professor in the University of Orlais who believes he's discovered the approximate location of Ameridan's final resting place. He is not very popular with the Chantry and his peers who believe the matter to be settled." That earned him an indignant scoff from Ellana. "However, if the Inquisition funds his expedition, he is eager to set out right away and uncover the truth, whatever that may be."

"What makes you believe he won't just sweep it under the rug if the truth is not what he expects?" she crossed her arms, not as sold on the idea as he'd hoped.

"He appears to be quite open-minded, even working with an elven research assistant. More importantly, we won't let him," he assured her. "With the Inquisition funding his research he won't have an option to hide the truth."

She was silent for a while.

"I need to be there. When he finds him."

"Of course."

More silence. Solas waited patiently for her to digest the news. He did not expect her to jump for joy, Ameridan's disappearance and subsequent erasure from history seemed like an emotionally difficult topic for her. But he did hope discovering his fate would eventually bring her closure.

"You did this for me? Why?"

That was a question he had anticipated, though perhaps not the question he was ready to answer.

"He seemed important to you," he said, but couldn't stop there. "And you have become important to me."

She took his hand and squeezed it silently, looking into his eyes. She always had something to say, but not for this. And yet this simple gesture, the emotion in her eyes were saying more than mere words ever could. He felt those eyes drawing him in, testing his self-control. If in that moment she closed the distance between them, if she just said anything, he would be lost.

Instead, she let go of his hand.

"Thank you," she said quietly. "If you give me the details, I will get them to Josephine and… we'll see what comes out of it."

It took some time to organise the expedition. Then, of course, the Inquisition had to send some people to keep the historians safe as they went deep into the Avvar territory. Then there was some argument from Cassandra that she, a Seeker of Truth, was the logical choice for this expedition, rather than Ellana who should be focusing on dealing with Corypheus and not putting herself in unnecessary danger like this. Ellana, of course, was having none of it. She was going, and if Cassandra wanted to tag along, she was welcome to it. Solas was mildly impressed by how she weaved half-truths with actually good arguments, never letting on what she already knew about Ameridan, to convince her advisors that she should lead the expedition personally.

That also made Solas wonder how much of the truth she was telling him. He was soon going to find out, provided this Orlesian historian's discovery was not about to turn out to be a wild goose chase. By bringing Ellana face to face with the one thing he's ever seen her lose control over he was hoping to unbalance her enough to finally reveal the truth of who she was.

He hated that his mind worked like that. He did truly want to help her uncover this mystery and put it behind her. That was the truth. But truth was rarely a simple and singular thing, especially when people were involved. It was also an opportunity. She was close to figuring out his identity, he was sure of that. The best thing for him would be to come clean before she did anything rash, to take back control of the situation. And he wanted to tell her, desperately, for more reasons than one, and was simultaneously frightened of her ever finding out, from him or otherwise, because that meant it would all be over. She would never see him the same way again, and he would have to proceed with his plans. If he could buy another day of them, of just being Solas, that was almost worth everything. Almost.