After Shin had left the lively kitchen, he headed into one of the empty rooms on the floor below. The sound of thunder heard despite the closed window soothed him, as he sat on the cracked tiles resting his back against the wall. His hand slowly reached his ear, where the Para-RAID device resided, and connected to the network, choosing the familiar target.
"Colonel, are you there?" The man asked softly.
"Shin! I was about to call you! Nice timing." The silver-bell-like voice emanated a hint of delight, showing those weren't just empty words. He smiled unconsciously, her positive attitude reaching him despite the exhaustion. Shin loosened up after hearing her joyful tone.
"Is everything alright?" He felt like this question was repeated relentlessly in their every conversation, but he had no idea how to convey his concern better.
"We caught a little intruder, I'm sure you won't be surprised…" She sighed resignedly.
"Not again… did Frederica cause any issues? I'll call and rebuke her properly." Captain was incredibly annoyed at the mischief his little adoptive sister had produced, but he couldn't say it was surprising. Had Ernst not learned his lesson last time? This child had to be monitored extensively to not spark any trouble.
"It'll have to wait until the morning, she has finally fallen asleep. I have no strength after dealing with this little girl… She had begged to be given to you when merge again, is that okay with you? I'm worried that in the Republic I won't be able to babysit her properly, with all the wreaking havoc coming in….." Lena groaned thinking about the near future, already ashamed by the reception waiting on the rescue mission. She knew her fellow countrymen well, and the prospect of showing her friends this ordeal once again made her nauseated.
"She'll be under my constant watch, I promise I'll take care of her." He declared without a second thought, as Shin had considered Frederica his responsibility.
"Thanks. How is your mission going?"The generic question made the interaction feel repetitive, even stale as if they couldn't talk freely anymore. No one knew what made it so, or how to restore it naturally.
"It's going good, the Republic's border where we plan to cross is all cleared up, the only issue remaining is the cluster at the end of the mountain. We'll get there in no time, and later join you in three days top." Shin responded with an equally stiff answer, making the conversation go nowhere. The wall of silence fell on them, but no one chose to disconnect. When they sat in the stillness, Lena was the first to break the ice.
"Shin… I know a lot has happened, and we lived our separate lives. But would you mind sharing some stories of this time? I'm not talking about big operations like Morpho, but the more… mundane stuff. To catch up a little…." Uncertainty poured down on Shin, as he felt her emotions clearly through the Para-RAID. Like always, she was the first to offer her hand, and he was eternally grateful for doing so.
"With pleasure. I feel stupid for not asking earlier." In this moment they weren't military officers or soldiers fighting for life and death, but an awkward pair of teenagers unsure how to navigate in the swarm of feelings. "I've been learning how to cook. I'm far from being called a pro, but according to Raiden, they are more than edible. The first time I tried baking it was a disaster and everything tasted like charcoal, but now I get requests to cook up something during breaks!"
"Oh wow! I've never baked in my life… Annette is a master in baking, so all my time working for the military I've been blessed with her sweet experiments. She sometimes even got a real milk or some fruit, it was a rarity for us…" Lena stopped talking when she realized how ironic it was, boasting about something, that was plain for him. The Republic made Eighty-Six farm their food as the synthetic rations the capital gave were not nearly enough to cover their needs.
"I know what you're thinking, and you have to stop it now. We are no longer in the Republic, and we do not hold you responsible for anything. If every discussion will boil down to the guilt, I'd rather not talk about that stuff." Shin set a firm boundary.
"…Sorry, I'll try my best." She responded with sincerity, but the guilt had not subsided. He recognized it was a small step forward, so he did not dwell on that further.
"I've never asked what happened after our departure, were you punished for using the mortars and losing your unit? We probably gave you a mountain of trouble…" He asked.
"It wasn't that bad, totally worth it. I am angry at myself for not doing this sooner. Bragging about nepotism seems lame, but I got off with a slap on the wrist thanks to my uncle." Lena felt lighter, recalling her first big rebellion. "I got demoted and placed on house arrest, but I've struck an absurd deal to shorten even that."
"Community service? Public shaming?" Shin asked jokingly, not sure what was considered the norm.
"Fulfilling my duties. Most people would regard getting dressed in fancy clothes and attending parties nonstop as a reward, but my mom and uncle knew, how sufficient of a punishment that was. Imagine me being forced to socialize in a tight dress instead of carrying out my military duties…." She rolled her eyes, aware of how ludicrously it sounded. The memories of the draining dances and countless suitors, pestering her like mosquitoes, felt distant, due to how gruesome was the Republic's end.
"It must have been a sight to behold." He laughed, but the idea didn't look bad in his mind. Since he'd seen Lena in real life, her captivating appearance couldn't leave his thoughts. He had seen many Alba during his lifetime, so their silver eyes and hair hadn't surprised him, but something about her felt special. Even the hairstyle she shared with Anju appeared different, the way her strands of hair fell in front of her shoulders when she sat over the reports captivated him every time. The sight of Lena in the beautiful ball dresses was superficially fitting, as the air around her always exuded elegance. He knew, however, that the battlefield was her real element, and the stuffy dresses had brought her no joy. Instead of elaborate gowns, she preferred a simple uniform, with the sophisticated ballrooms stifling her in comparison to her vivid smile while keenly working in the barracks. That's what stuck out to him about her.
"I'm sure the Federacy had their share of balls, considering their imperialistic roots. Have you ever tried it?" Lena asked with curiosity.
"They had forced me to one or two, but it's not my piece of cake. When I see a tuxedo being ironed in the house, I mysteriously disappear. Don't get me started on Ernst's neckties and bows collection. He insisted that we dress up nicely and spend an hour getting our colors matched by him. I can't imagine doing the same with whole dresses." Shin rolled his eyes at the memory. Being the descendant of a noble Nouzen clan did not make a single part of him fond of lavish parties.
"Add the shoes, accessories, and make-up to the mix! You can feel like the store mannequin or a marionette. My mother somehow enjoyed it, I could never understand her."The shadow of grief emerged, making it clear she had left this world.
"Your mom… were you close? We don't have to talk about it if you don't want to." Shin felt that he accidentally triggered a heavy matter, unsure of how to proceed.
"It's… complicated. We had our differences, some of them irreconcilable. But one thing I'm sure of, she truly loved me and wanted the best for me. Even if her idea of happiness was worlds apart from mine." Longing, remorse, and bitterness resounded in her voice. The intricate nature of their relationship couldn't be explained in a few words, but deep down Lena knew, she would miss her nagging. "Someday I'd love to tell you more about her, but now I've got to sort it out myself."
"I understand. The familial relationship can be messy." He recalled his brother, Rei. Their bond was everything but simple, and yet Shin still loved and yearned for him. Putting Rei to rest was a driving factor in his life for so long, that he still felt the emptiness inside after their final goodbye. It must have been hell for Lena, with the freshness of those wounds. Despite that, she had not been showing anyone she might be struggling, choosing a bright brave face each day.
"Thanks, Shin. We both have our demons to face, but I feel a lot lighter after talking to you. Someone requests my assistance outside, but I'm glad we could have this moment to ourselves." Gratitude and joy enveloped Shin from the Para-RAID, conveying Lena's sincerity. He felt a warm feeling in his chest but was unable to name it.
"Me too. I'll always be here if you need me." After uttering those words a sudden wave of embarrassment came over him, realizing how cliché he must sound, but the Colonel had already left the call with a blissful smile on her face.
April 30th Republic Year 368 (Stellar Year 2149)
117 days until the Legion's Large-Scale Offensive
The weather was chilly, but he had long lost the ability to feel the cold. There was no trace of who he was before, only an empty shell fulfilling his duties.
Why was he so devoted?
The being, once a man, did not know. It didn't feel the need to know either. It had been years since he had shed his human skin, replacing it with superior machinery.
Why did he do that?
No memory emerged, but he felt no disappointment. The past had not mattered, but sometimes his formerly human brain drifted away with useless thoughts as an old habit. Long ago Legion's methods weren't so refined, their blades cutting through flesh senselessly, without the precision required for such a fragile organ. There were parts of him that went missing, like puzzles dropped off the table, never to be picked up again. Remaining a brilliant tactician, the faceless man could no longer remember the life from before.
Who was he?
Every useless question the echo of his human self had whispered exasperated the efficient machine, fixated on achieving the mandated objectives. If only something could have strangled the remnants of his soul, he would have done so without hesitation, yet till then he was doomed to have a ghost wandering with him every step of the way. The ghost dolefully watched his every action, with unspoken hatred radiating from the inside. It was powerless, unable to change a thing, but despite that choosing to linger on his side. He knew that they were one and the same, but the dominion was his alone. A pitiful whimper of the spirit beside him could not break through any conscience he might have had, making it nothing more than a useless obstacle.
Nothing had changed in the environment, but the Shepherd knew, it was a time to move forward. Everything had to be done for the completion of the objective. He connected to the biggest production plant hidden from human sight and gave the order.
No Face to Mad Hatter. Begin the preparation of the Higher Network Complete Fusion project. Experiment subjects are to arrive in four months' time, do not fail.
Acknowledged, initiating Phase One.