After walking for some time, Gabrielle, along with Joxer, Ares, and Aphrodite, all stood at the entrance to a large cave.

JOXER

Is this where you sent everyone?

GABRIELLE

I think so. I mean, these are the only caves I know of around here.

ARES

Okay. But why are we here?

The bard shrugged.

GABRIELLE

I was hoping it might get some kind of idea for how to fix everything.

The god of war scoffed.

ARES

(Sarcasm) Right, because where we are will make any difference in you fixing everything.

GABRIELLE

(Slight;y irritated mumbled sarcasm) And you complaining will?

Ares shot the young woman an unhappy look, but was unable to respond before she began walking further into the cave.

GABRIELLE

Now come on. Unless you want to stay mortal.

The god growled to himself as he reluctantly followed the bard, with Aphrodite and Joxer also in tow.

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

The foursome walked through the cave for a while as Gabrielle tried to think of how she was supposed to come up with just the right thing she should write that would put everything back as it should be. She looked at the scroll in her hands as she walked.

GABRIELLE

(Thinking to herself) What am I supposed to write that'll fix all of this?

The bard looked up as she sighed to herself.

GABRIELLE

(Thinking to herself) I wish Xena were here. She'd probably know what to do. Well, hopefully, she's enjoying her day of fishing at least.

Lost in her thoughts as she came to a cross-section, Gabrielle was caught off guard when, out of nowhere, someone ran by her and snatched the enchanted scroll from her hand before disappearing down another corridor.

GABRIELLE

The scroll!

Quickly, the young woman raced after the man, leaving the other three behind.

JOXER

Hey, wait.

Following the same direction the bard and the scroll thief went, Joxer soon found himself standing in front of multiple pathways. He stood there for a moment as he tried to decide which way he should go, before choosing one at random to venture into further. He ran for a bit until finding a new open area and stopped dead in his tracks and stood there with a big dopey grin on his face as he found the trio of naked, dancing Gabrielles. Unaware that right behind him the scroll thief had emerged from a different corridor only to have the scroll thief taken from him by one of the barbarians that had been sent to those caves.

GABRIELLE

Joxer, the scroll!

Having shown up just in time to see the item change hands, Gabrielle hurried after the barbarian, who ran into another tunnel.

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

The barbarian moved through the cave, taking several different pathways, losing Gabrielle in the process, before turning a corner to find Minya and Ares.

MINYA

Look, they're coming our way! Come on.

ARES

Me? I'm mortal. I might be killed.

MINYA

Gods!

She rolled her eyes in disbelief.

MINYA

Forget it. I'll do it myself.

Suddenly, the barbarians were intercepted, when Gabrielle ran by and snatched the scroll. She then scurried around a corner and hid in a small crevasse as she knelt with a quill in hand and opened the scroll. Still unsure of what she should write, her thoughts again went to Xena and what the warrior would do in the situation.

GABRIELLE

(Thinking to herself) If I could only get Xena here, she would know what to do with this scroll. But no matter how I word it, this stupid scroll won't bring her back from wherever I inadvertently sent her.

Suddenly an Idea hit the young woman and she quickly began to write. After a moment, her quill had just finished a word when the barbarians came charging through the area. Gabrielle quickly dove out of the way as they ran through, with one of them grabbing the scroll on the way by.

JOXER

Gabrielle.

The bard stood as Joxer, Aphrodite, and Ares entered the corridor.

JOXER

We lost track of the scroll.

GABRIELLE

I had it. Then those barbarians took it again. I'm pretty sure they were heading back out of the caves.

JOXER

Then we better go after them.

The four moved to make their way out of the cave.

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

JOXER

Now what? I don't see those barbarians anywhere.

Before Gabrielle could answer, the three naked, dancing Gabrielles, Scaborus, and Minya all came dashing out of the cave behind them and ran over some hills before disappearing into the distance.

GABRIELLE

Don't worry Joxer, before the barbarians took it, I was able to write something in the scroll that might finally solve everything. … I hope.

JOXER

Why? What'd you write?

The bard smiled.

GABRIELLE

You'll see. But first…

She turned her attention to Ares.

GABRIELLE

Ares, we have got to catch up with your warrior friend, so we can call off his attack.

ARES

Well, I can't stop them as a mortal. When I get my powers back, I promise.

The young woman eyed the god, unsure if she should believe him or not.

ARES

I'm gonna punish Thallonius and his army in some painful, horrible way.

GABRIELLE

You know, innocent people are going to die.

ARES

Oh, yes, innocent people.

The bard scowled.

GABRIELLE

(Stern tone) Look! With or without you, we're gonna stop that army.

APHRODITE

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Who, exactly, is "We"?

JOXER

Wait a minute.

Joxer sniffed.

JOXER

Anyone else smell something?

He sniffed the air again.

JOXER

Is that fish?

A very disheveled Aphrodite scowled.

APHRODITE

(Annoyed tone) Lay off me, turkey! I'm new to this mortal hygiene thing!

Suddenly, the group heard a voice from nearby.

?

Hey, you guys looking for something?

Gabrielle turned around and smiled as she saw someone approaching.

GABRIELLE

Xena.

The warrior smiled as she made her way over to the bard and the others, pulling a large cart that was overflowing with fish behind her.

XENA

I took this off a peddler I just happened to run into not far from here.

The woman stopped and lowered the cart as she held up the enchanted scroll for Gabrielle to see.

XENA

He was being chased by barbarians, who were being chased by MInya and, three naked Gabrielles. She's still chasing them too.

She smirked as she continued and handed the young woman the rolled-up paper.

XENA

Oh, and I read the scroll, just so you know.

Gabrielle fiddled with the scroll in her hands as she looked sheepishly at the dark-haired warrior.

GABRIELLE

I guess I kind of messed things up, didn't I?

XENA

(Joking tone) You could say that.

Xena smirked.

XENA

(Joking tone) Interesting little limerick you wrote in there, by the way.

JOXER

Actually, that one was me.

Xena rolled her eyes.

XENA

Figures.

GABRIELLE

You know, I tried writing anything I could think of that would bring you back. I tried, "Xena goes to her number one friend."

XENA

You sent me to visit a girl I knew when I was five. Or my first friend.

GABRIELLE

What about, "Xena rejoins the woman who brought her to a new life"?

XENA

It was a good walk to Amphipolis. Mom says hi and thanks for the fish, by the way.

GABRIELLE

I guess that one makes sense.

XENA

Interestingly, when I did begin to make my way back, I suddenly got this irresistible urge to go back to fishing. That was when I realized something strange was going on. I had gone all over to see almost everyone who ever meant anything to me.

The raven-haired woman looked lovingly into Gabrielle's eyes as she continued.

XENA

Everyone except for you. That's when I knew where I needed to be.

The bard smiled softly as she got lost in the warrior's gaze for a moment until she and Xena heard Aphrodite speak up.

APHRODITE

Look, I really hate to be the one to break up, like, a major love-fest. I mean goddess of love here and all. But look at me!

The unhappy goddess stomped her foot as she got the warrior and bard's attention and gestured to her unkempt, homely appearance.

APHRODITE

I'm clearly not built to be mortal! We have to fix this and get everything the way it should be.

JOXER

Yeah, and don't forget stopping the valley from being attacked by that army.

The goddess waved off the comment.

APHRODITE

Yeah, sure. I guess that stuff too or whatever.

Xena sighed to herself at the reminder of how little the gods truly thought of mortals before carrying on.

XENA

Aphrodite, what were the exact words you used when you enchanted the scroll?

The goddess thought for a few seconds as she tried to recall what she had said after finding Gabrielle while she was writing.

APHRODITE

Um, I'm pretty sure it was "Lies will make the world go 'round, 'til truer

words are written down."

XENA

So, in other words, the scroll has the power to take anything someone makes up and writes down into a reality. And the spell can only be broken if things that are written in it are completely true. So that means all we need to do is write the truth and everything should be fixed.

Gabrielle let out a small, annoyed huff at the ridiculously simplistic solution to get around the scroll, taking what was written out of context.

GABRIELLE

Okay, so how do we get rid of this warlord?

XENA

That's simple. I'll take care of him. You just write down everything I do. But It has to be exactly what I'm doing. That means no embellishing, or taking creative liberties with how you write. It has to be exactly as you see it/ Got it?

GABRIELLE

Got it.

ARES

But how will we know if it worked?

XENA

If you get your powers back, then it worked.

GABRIELLE

Makes sense.

XENA

Good. Now let's get to work.

Xena grabbed the wagon full of fish she had been pulling before and walked off to meet the enemy army she knew would be there soon. Meanwhile, Joxer looked toward Gabrielle and couldn't help but notice a somewhat nervous expression on the bard's face.

JOXER

What's wrong?

GABRIELLE

I'm not really all that good at writing action stuff.

Suddenly all eyes turned to the young woman in disbelief.

ARES

What? You follow Xena around all day and make almost all your stories about her. How is it possible to do that without writing action?

GABRIELLE

I don't write what she does in a literal sense. I use metaphors.

JOXER

Metaphors?

GABRIELLE

Yeah. Stuff like, "Xena burst on the scene in a blaze of glory." You know, things like that.

JOXER

Well, you do that now, and we'll be picking her up in a million pieces.

The sudden full weight of the potential types of disasters that could happen if she wasn't careful fully sank in. Gabrielle looked at the scroll in her hands before turning her eyes toward Xena and knew that she needed to be sure to do exactly as the warrior said. Otherwise, it could spell certain doom for the woman.

TO BE CONTINUED…