I knew that I was going to alternate universes and not everything was always going to be the exact same as in the shows and movies, but this was truly shocking. Still I swallowed the uncertainty, and started my spiel "welcome to dead mans rest, the inter-dimensional knick knack shop. I'm the shopkeep how can i help you today?"
Peter looked taken aback but calmed himself.
"Im peter parker, and I'm looking for a job." He said in a calm voice looking over the shop.
"Well peter, id love to hire you but theres one thing that blocks you from qualifying for a job here, i don't hire superheroes. You rarely have the time to hold down the fort while I'm out and a large portion of this job requires manipulating people into buying more than they need, and screwing over assholes. Also i dont hire sixteen year olds"
Peter looks shocked for a moment, but sighs.
"Im no superhero, not any more at-least, and im 18 if that helps." He says and once again I'm shocked. Not at his age tom holland always looked 13 to me what truly surprising is he isn't a hero. Whats going on in the MCU. I quickly do something I've never bothered to do before i use observe on the door.
The MCU au where peter parker was born earlier thanks to the lack of Sony interference. Time dilation is slightly off to compensate for non linear story telling.. Currently it is 2008
That means Tony was just kidnapped which means he never would have gotten close to peter. Shield is still infested with hydra, so peter likely wouldn't have been recruited until the avengers assembled for the first time. More importantly my foreknowledge is officially useless.
"Alright kid usually when i connect to a world i have at least an idea of whats going on this keeps me at an advantage. The reason I'm shocked is from what i know of your world your supposed to be in underoos at this point doing science projects with your hot aunt. Instead you've already become disillusioned with being a superhero so tell you what you can have the job, if you tell me what the hell happened to you."
Peter sighs and i can see he is considering just leaving rather than getting into his story, but he needs the job.
"My aunt is dead. 2 years ago i got bitten by a radioactive spider, i told my aunt and she thought that i had a responsibility to use this power responsibly i was just a kid so i didn't really mind becoming a superhero aunt may was ex shield so she helped me learn how to be a hero. She told me to always keep my face covered and to never let anyone know i was spider-man. I kept that promise, until Liz Allen. I had a part time job at the daily bugle where we meet. She was always so interested in spider-man and i was interested in her so i said that i could set it up to get her an interview. That i was friends with spider-man. Turns out that was the wrong thing to say. The real reason she wanted to meet spider-man is that her real last name was Toomes. Her father Adrian Toomes was a villain i put in prison at the start of my career. She ended up kidnapping me and putting me in a death trap. Trying to lure out spider-man to kill him. I had to expose myself to save my own life. I put her down, but she was recording everything, she ended up live-streaming the reveal, soon everyone knew i was spider-man. Including the police. I was quickly arrested for vigilantism, and while i was in prison aunt may was killed. After i got out i promised i would never put the costume back on. That this world didn't deserve someone to protect them. That the villains were right. Looking out for the little guy instead of yourself was stupid." He said as bitterly as he could and i could understand it. Some pretty bad shit happened to peter in the comics but damn one year as spider-man and he already loses his aunt, gets betrayed by someone he had a relationship with and goes to prison. I don't think id cary on as a hero either.
Still i wonder what this will mean for tony stark now that theres a president for arresting superheroes for vigilantism.
"okay kid, you've had a pretty shit life. Not going to lie. I'm willing to hire you on one condition." He looks ready to bolt after everything he's said but calms himself again.
"And what is that condition."
"If the world ever needs you, you act as spider-man. Im not talking about street crime or petty villains. Im talking about end of the world type shit. You promise me you'll put aside your promise for those things and ill give you the job."
"Fine, I accept i need the job and its not like those things will happen anyways."
"Then shake my hand." I say with a sleazy smile. He grimaces but does so. Instantly he looks on edge staring at something thats not there.
"Thats just the system that allows you to convert this worlds currency into something useful for us. You'll be paid 100 essence a week which is 500 usd a week, but if you fail to bring in at least 1000 essence a week you will be fired." I said in a no-nonsense tone. I had no use for someone who couldn't make me money in a shop literally built to make money.
"Now a few rules we don't sell magic tomes to young children, the skill books are fine, but the tomes are too powerful to be put in the hands of young children. 11 and up is fine. We always sell to anyone no matter who they are, however the way we go about it is different. If someone is downright evil its our motto to screw them over as hard as we can. If someone is innocent, we do our best to help them even if that means going a bit out of our way. 3 as a member of this store things will get boring in between customers, you are free to read any magical tome you want but you have to pay for skill books."
I continued to explain everything he would need to sell and use the skill books potions and different items around the shop. Of course, he couldn't restock items but I'd be coming back every day. I told him the prices if every item, and the markup we do on quirks since only we can offer them. He works Monday through Friday and he's off on weekends unless I'm on a trip. Then he can use my bedroom to stay at the store.
" alright head home and come in at 8:00 am tomorrow when the store opens. Be well dressed and groomed."
Soon he left after checking out the store he didn't end up buying anything, but thats likely due to a lack of funds.
I was left thinking about how different this world was and how likely it was going to be that in four years I'll have to add on a second bedroom to keep my employee out of jail. When i hear a ding and i look over at the entrance to see one of my favorite customers with his Anbu escort.
"Naruto welcome back. Here to buy more stuff?" I ask as Kakashi gives me a stink eye behind his mask. Probably still mad about the ridiculous amount of money that i conned out of the man but Naruto was dressed in standard shinobi attire. Dark blue pants with a pouch for holding kunai and shuriken, a black cut proof and tear proof short, under armor that can stop a kunai and a shuriken, tape for his arms, and his little goggles on his head.
"Hey shop guy im here for more books!"
"While normally id be elated that you were here to buy more books. I must ask have you finished the elemental magics tome?" I didn't want Naruto to take on too much and get discouraged.
"Yep it was easy i already learned all the spells from it, and even created a fighting style to use them in conjunction with my taijutsu!" I was shocked i assumed Naruto was just an idiot that took too much after his mother and had little brains could he possibly be a genius? I did a auick observe on him and was shocked by what i found in terms of magical prodigies hes ahead of even Izuku. He's a rare sapphire blue rather than just a regular blue. Still i held in my shock.
"Well then i assume you want the tomes on elemental fusion?" I ask its the next logical place to start.
"Nah i want to learn necromancy!" Kakashi quickly whacked him in the head. Necromancy was off limits to anyone but jonin by hokage decree.
"Owe i was just kidding inu. I want a tome on elemental conjuration!" Naruto said rubbing the back on his head. It hurt damn it
"Very well but i would recommend you focus in fusion next. Power fusions like water and fire create destruction magic and that is incredibly useful for a future hokage." Im about to take hatakes payment of 70 essence when suddenly the door to my shop explodes open. Like it wad kicked open. Suddenly a blind woman with a massive bust shows up at the door shes stumbling and she smells like cheap sake.
"Hey your the shop keep right?!" The woman slurs and screams at me.
"Yes, i am the shop keep lady tsunade" i say wondering where this is going.
"The people of the village say you can do amazing things, and that you can buy anything."
"Yes thats true. I assume this is about your fear of blood?" I say asking her with a smile.
"That, and i want to know if you can bring back the dead.." Tsunade says and Kakashi is shocked.
"Do you have their blood?" I ask and instantly Kakashi looks down he doesn't have Obito, Rin, Minato ,or Kushina's blood all of their bodies were either lost in the field to his knowledge or destroyed to preserve the villages secrets.
Tsunade of course has the samples of dan and nawakis blood keep on file, likely for this exact thing. So she nods
"Then i only need one other thing. Something that you probably won't be able to get."
"And what is that." She asks
"The Edo Tensei jutsu."
"I don't want zombies anyways!" She answers with a snarl
"I'm not talking about their zombies I'm talking about their original consciousness its the only way to get that part from the pure lands anything else would be a clone not the true person."
Tsunade looks shocked she can get the blood, but Sarutobi wouldn't give her the impure rebirth summoning jutsu just to revive her fallen lover and brother. Not without something big. She looks at me and sighs and leaves but before she goes, she turns over her shoulder.
"I'll be back.."
With that she leaves. Kakashi looks at me disturbed.
"Can you really bring someone back from the dead?" He asks slack jawed
"Yes yes i can." I say with a smile "with the Edo Tensei."
"So you don't have anything that could pull a soul from the beyond?"
"Nope, though I'd only consider reviving a select few people. Most dead people should stay dead, and i intend to charge Tsunade a fuck ton. Now if you excuse me i have a jutsu to create.
I left and headed to the training room i hate trying to create jutsu as its always a risk but if I'm going to fulfill Tsunade order i need one jutsu that's fanon in particular. The blood clone.
It took me four days which was actually just an hour and a half on the outside but i made the jutsu. The blood clone. It takes all my chakra for a single blood clone leaving me in chakra exhaustion and damn near killing me, but i made it,
Tsunade didn't come in for the rest of the day. Which didn't surprise me she probably didn't want to be drunk for her meeting with Hiruzen.