Naruto is the creation and intellectual property of Kishimoto Masashi and Shueisha.
Special thanks to the Lawaifuteca Youtube channel for the inspiration.
La Waifuteca: The Fanfiction Series.
16- Haruno Sakura.
Measurements:
Bust: 77 cm.
Waist: 57 cm.
Hips: 81 cm.
Age:
17 years old.
Height:
161 cm.
Weight:
47 kg.
Eyes:
Green.
Hair:
Pink.
What's the Deal with Haruno Sakura?
She's the punching bag of the Naruto franchise amongst the fandom, except for those who ship her with Naruto or Sasuke, both of which are terribly toxic and badly written relationships, so... shrugs?
I want to like Sakura. There's something about the character that is likable in a fundamental way but then she's doing stupid stuff and hitting that glass ceiling Kishimoto's female characters have, often long before the other female characters do, and there's something so frustrating about her, you know? Like a good character is somewhere in there but the writing won't let her bloom. The dual personality shtick was funny and cute.
But I haven't written much about Sakura's backstory, right? In truth you probably remember more about Sakura than I do, I never was much into Naruto, other than really liking Rock Lee and Gai-sensei. Looking forward that crossover with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Sakura is an at first unremarkable kunoichi of the Hidden Leaf Village and she is in DEEP LOVE with SASUKE-KUUUN. She is in the same team as SASUKE-KUUUN and Naruto.
Unequally Rational and Emotional Kunoichi Showdown, Prologue.
A city lost in the tallest mountains of Japan, a site of mystery and tradition away from most tourist routes and accesses to large urban centers. The few outsiders who would occasionally wander in would just take a few pictures of the weird local Mount Rushmore, ask a few questions about it ("Who are those people supposed to be?" invariably being the first one), get a few well learned evasive answers from whoever they were addressing, be given a boring tour of the surroundings, and then leave quickly swearing to never return to such a stagnant, unremarkable backwater place.
It still was a nice village to live in whenever it wasn't being attacked by enemy ninja. It was just its citizens really wanted to keep it that way from any intruders.
So the local leader wasn't exactly surprised by the boy's reaction, even if his way to voice it still annoyed her.
"I don't want to," Uzumaki Naruto bluntly said.
Tsunade stared at him over her desk. "Have you ever been to Mahora before?"
"No," Naruto truthfully replied.
"Do you even know what's Mahora like?" she added.
"No idea at all," he candidly answered.
"Then," the busty blond woman currently occupying the seat of the Konoha Hokage (officially the post of Mayor for the outside world) told him, "why don't you want to go?"
He blinked his large baby blue eyes, which looked so odd on him now he was older and so much taller. "Because I've still got so much to do here?"
"Like what?" Tsunade asked him.
"Well, now Sasuke is—"
"Already taken care of," she matter of factly replied.
"But Sasuke—"
"Don't worry about him."
"It's-It's not that I'm worried about him or anything, but Sasuke—!"
"Sasuke will be fine, just like you will, but right now I think you need a vacation from Sasuke-related matters," the Hokage insisted.
Haruno Sakura, who sat by Naruto's left, shook her head in faint disapproval. "I can't believe it, are you that reluctant to see poor Kaede-chan again? You hate her or something?"
Naruto blinked and looked at the pink haired kunoichi. "What does Kaede-chan have to do with this? Just because I don't want to go there right now, that doesn't mean I have anything against her! She always can visit whenever she wants!"
"She can't," Sakura disagreed, "because she's supposed to be studying there, you know! She's not our trained puppy who should drop whatever she's doing travel across the country for us whenever we're missing her!"
"Well, I can't drop the Sasuke matter right now either!" Naruto protested.
"Listen, Naruto-kun," Tsunade frowned. "We've just reached a temporary peace among the villages, but the echoes of the War were so big they reached out to the rest of Japan. Our civil contractors aren't happy, they feel we threatened the stability of the whole country. In this context, keeping ties of good will with the outsiders is important, and outsiders don't get much more important than the Kanto Association and their leader."
"Who is also the Headmaster of Mahora Academy," Sakura said with a studious tone and formal nod.
Tsunade nodded back at her student. "Not only that, but representatives of all other major schools in the area, CLAMP, Ohtori and Honnouji, will be there too, including the daughter of Kiryuuin Ragyo herself."
"Who's Kiryuuin Ragyo?" the annoyed Naruto asked.
Sakura reached over to tug on the orange sleeve of her jacket. "Just the woman who manufactures pretty much all clothes in Japan, including everything you're wearing, that's who!"
"Big deal," Naruto sighed, then felt slightly guilty over his lack of cooperation when he noticed the glances Hinata was giving him from the chair at his right. No doubt she felt she was being an unhelpful jackass, he thought, completely missing her point for a freaking chance. "Okay, fine, if that's so important for you, and it'll be only a weekend, I'll do it."
"Excellent!" Tsunade smiled. "Sakura-chan and Hinata-chan will go with you as well!"
While Hinata's face lit up in a blush and smile Naruto once again completely missed on, Sakura gasped. "B-But Sensei! We've just retrieved Sasuke-kun—!"
"Already taken care of," she matter of factly replied.
"But Sasuke-kun—!"
"Don't worry about him, he's well past the stage where he would gladly move for the kill on a former teammate who still has the hots for him, or something else completely hypothetical like that."
"It's-It's not that I'm worried about his mental or legal state, but Sasuke-kun—! Listen, why not to send Lee-kun instead? His cousin Karasuma studies there, he told me so! Besides, Tenten can go with him, she's professional and never causes any problems, and anyway their team is on standby until they find a replacement for—"
Naruto nodded firmly. "That's a great idea, Sakura-chan. Just send Lee and Tenten over, Obaa-san!"
Tsunade simply stared icily at them.
"I mean," Sakura argued, "I get why you'd think you need Naruto's abilities with people, dubious as they can be, for the job. I've gotta admit, when he does the job, he really pulls it off." As Naruto basked on the praise ignoring the slight, she continued, "Besides, seriously, who's going to take care of Sasuke-kun while we're away? Ino? KARIN?"
"..." Tsunade said.
"Oh my God," Sakura cringed, "it's Ino and Karin, isn't it? Sensei, do you think there's any way that's going to end up well?!-?!"
"It'll be just for a weekend, what's the worst that could happen?" Tsunade waved a hand around.
Naruto, Idiot Hero as he was, narrowed his eyes. "Someone who holds the rank of Hokage never should say something like that..."
"Besides," Tsunade conversationally asked, flipping through a Mahora Tour booklet, "this will be a golden chance to widen your horizons and education. Have you heard the legends of Mahora's World Tree?"
As Hinata further blushed and her interest peaked, and Naruto just frowned in confusion, Sakura hummed, "Of course I do, and I think I mean what are you talking about, but— Oh," she quietly finished, looking at Hinata and Naruto and then back at Tsunade.
Master and student shared a brief knowing smile Naruto didn't understand at all while Hinata fidgeted frantically and Naruto just looked back and forth among them, puzzled as fuck.
"W-Well," Sakura told Tsunade, "I'll admit that's a noble cause, but I was under the impression—"
"If I ask him to, I'm sure Konoe Konoemon will look aside just in this case," Tsunade said with a teasing smirk, as Hinata began to hyperventilate quietly and Naruto only scratched his head.
"Okay, what am I missing out on here?" he asked.
Sakura sighed. "I guess there's no helping it, odds are the message will never get through otherwise..."
Tsunade nodded while Naruto protested, "What message? One I'm supposed to deliver to that Headmaster? Any idiot can do something like delivering a freaking message!"
"Right," Tsunade nodded, shaking his hand, "thanks for accepting the mission, then."
"I haven't said I have— Oooohhhh, I know what you did here! I'm not going to—"
Then he grumbled as he folded his arms and fell back on his seat. "What th' hell, I already had said I'd do it and a man doesn't go back on his word, whatever. But I won't like it!"
"I'm sure you'll end up liking it," Tsunade reassured him,
"Mahora is supposed to be quite an entertaining place, and Mahorafest brings visitors and fighters from all parts of—" Sakura began.
Naruto blinked several times in quick succession. "Fighters?" he abruptly asked, sitting up straighter.
En conclusion: Para que olvide al Sasuke hay que darle su retruque.