Chapter 5

(3,651 BBY - 12 years old)

Z'myra stood before the small mirror in my room admiring herself. "I think they're finally done growing in."

I looked up from my datapad and smiled. Her new horns were distinctly Zabrak, a row of small protrusions above her forehead. "You look amazing." She beamed at me and then turned back to the mirror.

"Master Khen-jo wants to take me back to his home village for my Selenoren and Rising Festival."

My datapad beeped and I tapped the screen to open the new message. "How long will you be gone," I said absently.

"Probably a few months. It's so exciting and…"

I stared blankly at the message, barely registering what she said. The mattress shifted and I looked up to see Z'myra sitting next to me. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, just a letter from my niece."

Z'myra's eyes went wide. "The little girl who went missing last year?"

"No," I said quickly. "No, this is from Rosh's daughter."

"I didn't know you had any other nieces."

"Me either. I haven't exactly kept tabs on my family." Actually, I knew nothing about my family except the little I learned the previous year. I'm sure I must have wondered what had happened to them, but I don't remember ever missing them. My parents had always been indifferent to me and my brothers were cruel and spiteful. But I never knew Rosh and Riyec. They'd already left home before I was born.

"So, what does it say?" Z'myra leaned closer to look at the datapad.

"Here," I handed it to her, "see for yourself."

To: Padawan Mariatu V'rede

From: Riyanne V'rede

Mariatu,

I hope this letter finds you well. My name is Riyanne. I am Rosh V'rede's eldest daughter. I can only assume you know nothing about me. That's okay. Until last week I didn't even know my dad had any siblings except my late uncle, Riyec. He died two years ago during the Sith attack here on Coruscant. I'm not sure how much you know about the peace treaty. The Sith held our whole planet hostage and forced the Republic to agree to an armistice. The city is still rebuilding.

I found some old holodiscs of my dad's while doing some research for a college project. Dad won't answer any of my questions, so I had to dig around on the Net for answers. I couldn't believe I have an aunt who is younger than me and that you are training to become a Jedi. My dad is still refusing to talk about his family so I am hoping you can answer some of my questions.

I came across an old news report from last year about a raid on Thani. Among the list of casualties were Corr and Linora V'rede and Nial and Keshani V'rede. I believe Corr and Linora were my grandparents and Nial my uncle. Keshani must have been his wife. I did a little more research and discovered Nial had a daughter named Nia'shani, but she isn't mentioned anywhere in the news report. Do you know what happened to her?

I know now that I have two more uncles. I haven't located Jarik yet, but from what I can tell Caalin is still in Thani. I think he runs the old cantina. That's all I've learned so far.

What is it like on Telos? Did you really grow up in a cantina? Do you like being a Jedi? Do you know what happened last year in Thani? Do you know anything else about your brothers?

I hope you are able to answer some of my questions. I will continue searching for more information about our family and I will let you know if I find anything. Please send your reply directly to me. Dad doesn't know I am contacting you. Please don't tell him.

Sincerely,
Riyanne V'rede

"Well this is unexpected." Z'myra handed me the datapad. "At least now we know not all of your family is insanely evil."

"Thanks a lot." I shoved her off my bed.

"So, are you going to reply?" She went back to the mirror and pulled her shoulder length red hair back so she could better see her new horns.

"I think so, but I have no idea what to write."

"I'm sure you'll come up with something."

"Here, sit." I pulled a chair over in front of the mirror and grabbed a small pair of scissors. Before she could protest, I started cutting her hair.

"What are you doing!" she squealed.

"Trust me."

About a half hour later I had her hair spiked on top with short, braided pigtails in the back. She looked absolutely adorable.

"So, what do you think?"

She grinned, "I love it."

"Are you really going to be gone for a few months?"

Her face went serious. "I'm not sure. Master Khen-jo said it will take as long as it takes."

"You're going to do great."

"I know, it's just . . . I've never been around other Zabrak before, except for Master Khen-jo of course."

I thought back to the day I met her. She had been horribly abused. I'd always wondered what had happened to her. "You never talk about what your life was like before coming to the academy."

"Neither do you."

"True, but I don't remember much."

"Me neither, but I think I prefer it that way."

That evening I sat down at my computer to type up a reply to my niece. I stared at the display for a long time, trying to decide what to write. I began typing, stopped, then deleted the words and started again. I must have tried a dozen times before I stood and walked away from the computer. This girl might be family, but she was also a stranger. I didn't know anything about her, or her father for that matter.

I changed tactics and opened the holonet. I ran a search on Riyanne V'rede. There wasn't much information. She was born on Coruscant to Rosh and Annalisa V'rede about twenty-one years before. She was an exemplary student and used to play Chin-Bret on her school's team. There was little else that could be found about her. I found even less about Rosh and Riyec, only that they were both former members of Havoc Squad. Rosh ran some sort of export business on Coruscant and Riyec's name was on the list of casualties from the Battle of Coruscant, just like Riyanne said.

Three days later I was once again staring at the display, wondering how to respond to my niece, or even if I should, when Z'myra came into my room carrying a platter of food.

"You missed dinner."

"I must have lost track of time." I sighed and looked back at the blank display.

"You haven't replied yet, have you?" She set the plate of food down on the corner of my small desk.

"I have no idea what to write." My voice sounded whiny, even to my own ears, and I sighed again. "I'm not sure I should reply. Rosh doesn't know she contacted me, and he obviously doesn't want her to know about our family. Wouldn't writing her be some sort of betrayal to my brother?" I pulled the food over and pushed it around with my fork, not really interested in eating.

"No." She paused and looked away from me. "If anyone has betrayed someone, it's your brother. His daughter has a right to know her family and he has kept that from her."

She turned back to look at me, her eyes filled with tears, and I could feel the sadness in her. "Mari', family is important. I think the Jedi are too quick to forget that." I watched her leave the room, confused, and concerned about her.

It took most of the night, but I finally wrote a reply. I answered her questions as best as I could, though she probably knew more about our family than I did. At first, I wasn't sure what to make of my niece, but over the years I've come to appreciate her more than she will ever know.

Over the course of my life I have probably only begun to understand how Z'myra feels about family ties within the Jedi order. We are taught that emotions are dangerous and to have close relationships or ties to others can cause harm and impair judgment. I'm not sure I believe that. Throughout my life I have had many friends whom I have loved dearly, and I can't believe that those ties have in any way been a weakness. Often, they have been a source of strength, especially Z'myra.

The day she was to leave for her Selenoren she showed up in my room before dawn. I came awake the moment I felt her presence. I could feel her sadness and loneliness. I sat up in bed and saw her standing in the doorway. I switched on the light and said, "Come in." She looked back over her shoulder nervously then entered the room. "What's wrong?" I asked, instantly alert.

"Nothing," she hesitated, "It's just… I'm not supposed to be here."

"Why not?"

"We're leaving in a few minutes." She glanced back at the door and I followed her gaze to the small bag propped up against the door. My heart lurched as I realized my best friend would be gone for months. I wanted to curl back up in my bed and cry. I smiled instead.

"You're so lucky. I wish I were going." I willed myself to sound cheery. "Do you realize I haven't left the academy for almost seven years?"

"Eight, isn't it?" she said automatically.

"Aren't you excited?" I said, ignoring her correction.

"I guess."

"You should be. You're leaving a girl and when you come back, you'll be a woman." I grinned at her. "I can't wait to see your new tattoos."

She smiled sadly. "I want to be excited, really I do. But how can I go through the trials when I don't even know who I am? I have no clan. I don't even know who my parents are. I have no family. What do I say if they ask me which clan I am from?"

"Z'myra, I am your family. You are my sister and you always will be. And if anyone asks you, tell them you are from clan V'rede."