CHAPTER 10

Something's wrong with Zoe, but she won't tell me what it is. She just . . . is acting differently. And has been acting differently since we discussed the Muggle-born registration. I think she's more worried about it than she's letting on, but whatever it is that's bothering her, I'm feeling slightly uncomfortable as I crawl under the sheets to get warm.

On the bright side, however, I was foolish to think she might even be tempted to consider registering as a Muggle-born. She's smarter than that—as she made sure to let me know.

Over dinner, we set up a plan for her escape should the Death Eaters come looking for her. She doesn't want to disappear just yet, so if the Death Eaters should come for her, she's going to go to a Muggle friend from her childhood and let me know via Milo immediately. She'll lay low there until she's certain that the Death Eaters have lost her trail, and then we'll say our goodbyes, after which she will escape to Paris and stay there with her cousin until all is safe and I go get her. Which won't be until the Dark Lord is dead. The thought of being separated from her tugs at my heart, but knowing she will be safe allows me to push the sadness aside.

Though part of me wants to stay awake and simply spend some more time with her, we are both too exhausted to even attempt that. Now she's in the bathroom preparing to go to sleep, and I have taken up my spot on the empty half of her bed. Already, sleep pulls at me despite my best efforts to fight it. I haven't truly rested enough since the trauma my body went through just a few days ago, which is probably the cause of my exhaustion.

Zoe comes out of the bathroom in a black T-shirt and running shorts, a smile on her face, her honey eyes watching me happily. "So, what exactly do you tell her when you don't come back at night?"

I've still been unable to tell her about my real living arrangements with Snape. I came close a few times, only to cower away when I opened my mouth to speak. She now believes that I've been staying with Bellatrix since I left St. Mungo's, that I went to my parents' cottage after Narcissa came to fetch me. Regardless of the overwhelming desire to tell her everything, to tell her that I have not been at the cottage with my mother but rather at Spinner's End again with Snape, doing so would betray him. I want to tell her the truth about him because she so often says something harsh about him in hopes that it will make me laugh through the pain he caused when he killed Dumbledore. I want her to know everything but simply cannot bring myself to betray Snape like that, for he has done far too much for me.

"The truth," I lie.

Her eyebrows rise.

"I tell her I'm spending time with Draco."

Zoe laughs and slides under the sheets. "I was worried there for a half-second."

I crawl closer to her and take her hand. "I wouldn't do that to you." I press a swift kiss to her lips, and we curl together to go to sleep.

"Do you think your dad knows who you are? Or his brother?"

"I don't think so."

"Even after they saw you and Bellatrix together at the manor?"

"I'm not sure. Why?"

"Just curious. I'm always on the lookout for someone who can help you escape."

It doesn't take long for me to drift off.

Two cold hands grab me around the shoulders, and I'm just about to make a snide comment to Zoe when I open my eyes and behold a pair of eyes that look like mine. Rodolphus Lestrange drags me from the bed, and I shout Zoe's name too slowly. Rabastan lurches at her and pulls her from the mattress. "Mulciber, get the wands!" my father commands, wrapping his strong arms around me from behind and to try to keep me from attacking.

The third Death Eater in the room comes at me, and I kick out at him and manage to connect with his chest. He grunts and grabs my leg tightly. "Easy, easy," Rodolphus's deep voice coos into my ear. "Stop fighting."

"Please don't do this!" For a brief second his grip lessens, but he quickly tightens it back once more. "Zoe! Zoe!"

Zoe, my uncle's arms around her waist from behind, fights against Rabastan, throwing elbows and kicking backward the best that she can, but it seems to affect him not at all beyond angering him.

Mulciber's grip on my right leg is as strong as iron, but I manage to thrust the heel of my left leg into his nose. He falls backward, distracting Rodolphus momentarily as he calls out to his fellow Death Eater to see if he's okay. I take this opportunity, whispering a soft apology because he is still my father, to jerk my knee backward and upward to lift my foot up and hit him in the groin with my heel. He releases me completely and hits the floor.

I dive across the bed and snatch my wand from beneath the pillow, then hit both Zoe and Rabastan with the Impediment Jinx. They smash into the bookshelf, and it topples and crashes onto the floor. Zoe groans in pain, but the force was enough to cause Rabastan to release her, giving her a chance to scramble away from him. She slides onto the bed and thrusts her hand under her own pillow to pull out her wand as well. She stands beside me, both of us watching the Death Eaters carefully.

I cast a shield around each of us. "We should Disapparate," I say to her.

"I tried that already," she says. "Right after I got my wand. It didn't work."

Rodolphus pulls himself to his feet. "Charlotte, you don't want to fight us."

"Don't act like you know me."

A flash of red from Rabastan's wand scarcely misses Rodolphus and strikes Mulciber square in the back, and he falls, unconscious, to the bedroom floor. "Your friend, Miss Rodgers—what's your name, girl?" Rodolphus waits patiently until Zoe answers him. "Miss Accrington," he then greets her. "Miss Rodgers, your obviously close mate here is in danger. The Dark Lord will most likely kill her." His eyes land on Zoe. "You need to leave. I'll take Miss Rodgers back with me, but you must not follow."

"I won't let you take her!"

"You have no choice!"

"Zoe," I say quietly, taking in the intensity of my father's stare, "maybe we should listen to him."

Her hand drops as she rounds on me. "You can't trust them!"

"Miss Accrington, you're running out of time. You must leave us, or he'll kill you." He waves his wand, probably lowering the Anti-Disapparition Jinx. Disapparate with her now before it's too late.

Zoe turns back to him, evaluating him, then says, "All right." She gives my hand a comforting squeeze, but before any of us have a chance to really do anything, two loud pops! alert us of more unexpected intruders. Spells crash into mine and Zoe's shields, breaking them down and blasting us against the wall. Bellatrix and Lucius charge at us while Rabastan goes to Mulciber and attempts to awaken him. Rodolphus hesitates before joining his wife and Lucius in their assault. Malfoy grabs me fiercely and Disapparates with me, then throws me to the cold, hard floor of the Malfoy Manor sitting room. Bellatrix appears seconds later with Zoe and does the same to her as Lucius had done to me.

Fear flashes through Zoe's eyes for a split second before she sets her jaw and prepares to attack, but Lucius slams his foot into her stomach. She doubles over, and he pounces, snatching up her wand and throwing it to the wall.

Bellatrix expels my wand from my hand and tosses it across the room.

Lucius stands and flattens the wrinkles on his clothing. "Really, Lestrange, you couldn't even manage to subdue two young witches," he mocks Rodolphus, who is standing to the side with Rabastan and newly awakened Mulciber. "Azkaban must have done more harm to you than it did to your wife."

Bellatrix clenches her jaw before saying, rather curtly, "Put them in the cellar. The Dark Lord will come for them later."

Rodolphus and Rabastan each grab one of us and, despite our efforts to thwart them, haul us down the stairs and into the cellar. "I am truly sorry," my father whispers to us before disappearing up the steps.

I reach over and take Zoe into my arms, my heart in my stomach as dread weighs down on me. How did they find out? How did they know where she lives? What will they do to her? You know exactly what they'll do to her. A small sob escapes me, and I pull Zoe tighter. "I'm so sorry," I whisper. I should have stayed away. This is my fault. This is my fault. This is my fault.

Nearly thirty minutes later, Bellatrix returns to find us still holding onto each other, my quietly whispered apologies flitting about the room, Zoe's soft assurances echoing after.

"Release her this instant, you filthy Mudblood!"

Zoe jerks away, a look of fright crossing her face again, then throws me an apologetic glance. I shrug it off and look back at the Death Eater, taking a step to put myself between her and Zoe. "Mum, you don't have to do this."

Anger flashes through her eyes, and she lurches forward, pushing me aside, and grabs Zoe roughly by the arm. "I should have known that you'd tell her the truth. Now you come nicely, or I shall have to hurt the Mudblood." Then she drags Zoe behind her and hisses at me to follow. Rodolphus, Rabastan, and Mulciber are on one side of the sitting room when we arrive, Greyback, Lucius, and Draco on the other side as if creating a tunnel from which Zoe and I cannot escape.

"Charlotte?" Draco asks, his face paling. "Charlotte!" His father snatches his arm, and Greyback steps forward and grabs me roughly to keep me from running to Draco. Rodolphus and Rabastan do not meet my gaze as I'm led from the room, but I see them watching Zoe closely, a look of sorrow in their eyes. Bellatrix and Greyback lead Zoe and me from the room. Narcissa stands in the hallway, unspeaking but with quiet tears on her cheeks. She can do nothing as Zoe and I are led down the hall to a room I recognize instantly. This is the room where the Dark Lord performed his Dark Magic on me. I shudder at the sight.

Greyback the werewolf does not follow the other three of us into the room. The Dark Lord himself stands before a crackling fire, Nagini at his feet. He glances over at us and says, "I rather hoped my Death Eater was mistaken in the information he gave me." The man—if he can be called such—comes toward us and stops before me, staring down at me furiously. "Tell me Rodolphus and the other two were mistaken, dear one. Tell me you were not sharing a bed with this . . . creature."

I glance at Zoe. "Of course they were mistaken, my Lord," I say reverently, even going so far as to bow. "I would never betray you in such a way."

He says something I cannot understand, and the snake slithers its way over to Zoe. Bellatrix releases her and takes a few steps back. Zoe does not move away, simply clenches her fists together as the snake coils around her feet. "Do not lie to me, Charlotte," he says abruptly, "or Nagini will have the distasteful dinner of a Mudblood." He takes a step closer to me, so close I can feel the heat coming off him, and I'm frozen on the spot, unable to step away from him, unable to look away from Zoe, unable to think of something to say to get us out of this situation.

"Please," I say, still looking at Zoe and the snake. "Please. Let her go."

"Who is she to you, dear one?" he asks icily.

I close my eyes and take a breath. "She's no one, my Lord. She's—she's just—just a Mud—Mudblood I relieve stress with. She's not important to me."

His jaw twitches. "Is that so?" The Dark Lord takes a step back from me, says something again to Nagini that makes her slide away from Zoe and out of the room; then, before I can do anything to stop him, before I can say another word, before I can even take a breath, he casts the Cruciatus Curse on Zoe, and she collapses in pain, screeching for it to stop, screeching my name as if I can stop this. I try to lunge forward, but Bellatrix suddenly has her arms around me tightly to stop me, and I shriek Zoe's name.

The Dark Lord smiles viciously and releases the curse. "She is nothing to you, is she? She is only someone with whom you share a bed?"

I look away, tears forming in my eyes. A cold hand on my chin forces me to look up, the Dark Lord directly in my face again.

"Dumbledore might have taught you Occlumency, but I doubt he taught her. What secrets of yours is she concealing in that mind of hers, dear one?"

"I wouldn't know," I snap.

"Shall I—"

My spit leaves my mouth before I have a chance to process what I'm doing, and it hits him square in the face. With a steady hand, he wipes my disrespect from his cheek, and as he's aiming his wand at me, Bellatrix quickly interjects, "My Lord, she's being influenced by the Mudblood. Don't—"

"Silence, Bella." But he still stops from attacking me and instead points his wand at Zoe, and she begins walking toward the fire.

My heart beats frantically. "My Lord," I try, but she continues. "My Lord, please—"

Zoe sticks her left hand in the flame, screeching and crying, as I plead and fight against Bellatrix's strong grip. The moment the Dark Lord drops his wand, Zoe falls backward, sobbing, holding her viciously shaking hand to her chest.

"Every piece of her that touched you, dear one, must be burned away."

"No!" I shriek, pulling at my mother. "No, please! Please! I'll do anything!"

"Crucio."

I shout for the Dark Lord to stop as Zoe shrieks in pain, as her body flails under the curse. A moment later he releases the spell, and Zoe gasps for breath and rolls onto her side. I bow my head to the Dark Lord and breathe evenly. "Thank you," I whisper. "Thank you."

"You thank me for ceasing the curse?" he asks cruelly. A shiver runs down my spine at his words. "Bella." Suddenly a spell freezes me in place, and my mother has her wand drawn.

"Mum, don't," I beg, tears blurring my vision.

"Cruciate her, Bella. Cruciate the Mudblood who has ruined your daughter's name, who has defiled her."

"Mum, please. Please don't, I love you."

Bellatrix glances at me briefly before turning her full attention to Zoe.

Zoe catches my eye and shakes her head. "Cruciate me all you want, Lestrange, it won't change anything."

This ignites a round of fury in the Dark Lord—the spell drops from me and I can move again—and he aims his wand at her and shouts, "Crucio!"

Zoe's shrieks pierce the air, and I lunge forward, scarcely dodging my mother's hand as she reaches to stop me. I land in front of Zoe and intercept the curse. Pain erupts in every fiber of my being, but I do not regret it, not even when the Dark Lord refuses to cease his curse. I would take any amount of agony if it meant sparing Zoe.

After a long minute, the curse relinquishes its hold on me, followed by an enraged, "You insolent girl!" My eyesight focuses to see a pillow beside the Dark Lord's wand, both on the floor a few paces from him, and that alone relieves the aching in me. Zoe and I help each other up, and we face the Dark Lord, me standing slightly in front of her in a feeble attempt to protect her. I reach backward, my hand searching for hers, and lace our fingers together.

"Bellatrix, remove your daughter from the Mudblood."

"Mum, don't," I say, not removing my eyes from the wizard. "Don't do this. You don't owe him anything. He's taken everything from you. He took me from you when I was just a baby, and he took me from you again last month and sent me away. He let me grow up in an orphanage all alone, knowing you would never have approved. He took me from you. You owe him nothing."

"I will Cruciate your daughter until she is alongside those Aurors in St. Mungo's. Remove her from the Mudblood."

"Mum—"

Bellatrix grabs me violently and begins hauling me away from Zoe, but I do not release Zoe's hand, so I pull her along with me until the Dark Lord blasts her with a spell that sends her crashing to the floor.

"Zoe!" I shriek, pulling against Bellatrix.

"Crucio!"

Zoe cries out, her body convulsing. "Cruciate me! Cruciate me, not her! Please! Please! Don't hurt her anymore!"

The Dark Lord jerks his head toward me, not letting up on the curse. "You dare try to take the Mudblood's punishment?"

"Yes! Yes! Just please don't hurt her! I love her, don't hurt her!"

His red eyes flare. "You dare claim to love a Mudblood?"

"STOP CALLING HER THAT!"

Zoe stops shrieking. The Dark Lord turns to me and watches me for a long moment. Then he takes a step closer to me and grabs me by the chin. His red eyes bear into me, and I can feel the tears stinging already. "You are important to me, dear one, and as—"

"If I'm important to you, let her go," I say quietly.

"That's not an option."

"Kill me and let her go. I'm the one who betrayed you."

"I need you alive." His mouth twitches. "But I need you to stop rebelling against me."

"I'll stop if you let her go. I'll do anything if you just let her go. Just let her go. Please. I'll never see her again, and I'll stop fighting you. I'll be your most compliant follower. You can do whatever you want to me, and I will not fight you. Please. I'll do whatever you want."

"Aurelia—"

"Enough, Bella." His grip on my chin tightens painfully. His eyes flick to my mother for a brief second before landing on me again. "The Mudblood will die."

Bellatrix tightens her arms around my waist and pulls me farther away from Zoe. "PLEASE!" I cry, struggling forward against my mother's strong hold but cannot break free from her. "PLEASE DON'T DO THIS! I'LL—I'LL DO ANYTHING! I'LL—I'LL STOP RESISTING YOU! MY LORD, PLEASE DON'T DO THIS! LET HER LIVE, AND I WILL NEVER CONTACT HER AGAIN! LET HER LIVE, AND I WILL SERVE YOU WILLINGLY!"

I wipe the mucus from my upper lip, coughing against my sobs, still attempting to break free from my mother's grip. She tightens her hold, one arm wrapping around my shoulders, and continues dragging me away from Zoe and the Dark Lord.

Zoe watches me with tears in her eyes, but the Death Eaters disarmed the both of us, and now we're defenseless against the Dark Lord's attack. He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named looks between us, a wicked look in his eye. "My Lord—please—please." My knees grow weak, and I feel myself slipping to the floor until the arm around my waist pulls tighter to keep me upright.

"You've bestowed your affections upon someone," he says icily. "A Mudblood, of all the vile creatures you could have chosen."

Everything aches, my heart, my lungs, my chest, my stomach, my bones. Everything revolts against the sorrow consuming me, but the Dark Lord does nothing more than watch me with a disgusting look of joy.

Zoe smiles sadly at me and mouths, "I love you."

My chest caves in. I throw my head back against Bellatrix's nose, ram my elbow into her gut, and thrust myself at Zoe. I take her into my arms and bury my face in her neck. "I'm so sorry," I whisper, "I'm so sorry. This is all my fault."

"Don't blame yourself, I—" A spells slams into us, thrusting us apart, and I have no chance to get back to Zoe before Bellatrix is wrapped around me again and pulling me away once more.

"Please."

The Dark Lord flexes his hand in rage but keeps it contained. He casts a dark look upon Zoe but says, "On behalf of our dear Charlotte, I will allow you to say one last thing before your death." As if that will assuage me, as if that will make me forget about what he's done, as if that will stop me from fighting him with everything in me. As if that will fix what he's doing now, as if it will make me hate him less. As if I will ever serve him willingly now.

Zoe nods and thanks him quietly before looking directly at me, a soft, sad smile on her face, and says, "'And what dying is—and that if you look at it in the abstract and break down your imaginary ideas of it by logical analysis, you realize that it's nothing but a process of nature, which only children should be afraid of.'" Bellatrix gasps in my ear, but I pay her no attention, for Zoe continues, "He also says that dying is an assignment of life and that it is not a disgrace. I am not afraid to die, Marcus, I've been living on borrowed time for years. You know that. I'm only afraid of leaving you with these monsters." The Dark Lord levels his wand at her, and Zoe quickly spits out, "I love you, Charlotte, and I'm sorry things couldn't have worked out differently."

I cannot hear the Killing Curse cast by the Dark Lord over my sudden, sharp scream, but I very clearly see the green flash that strikes her square in the chest, and I very clearly see her fall, lifeless, to the floor. The wizard grins victoriously at me, and I break free from my mother once more and rush toward Zoe. I hold her close to me and sob into her neck. "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry." I rock her back and forth, struggling to take a real breath. It's my fault. It's my fault. It's my fault.

"Bella, extract your daughter from the Mudblood. Take her back to Severus. See to it that he keeps her wand from her until they leave for Hogwarts."

Never have I ever felt this sort of pain. Not even Bellatrix's Cruciatus Curse can compare to the cave hollowing out in my chest. The Dark Lord's attempt to impregnate me did not hurt me as badly as I hurt now. The world has shifted. Never again will I be able to look upon a painting, a teapot, or any owl like Milo without being reminded that Zoe is dead because of me. Had I simply stayed away from her rather than allow myself to fall in love with her, she would still be here. Had I gone back to the Lestrange Cottage when Fred ended things with me, had I not gone to Zoe's flat, she would still be alive. She's dead because of me.

Two arms slip around me and try to pull me away from Zoe, but I must protect her from further harm. "You have to let go of her," my mother says quietly into my ear. But I refuse and latch onto her more tightly. Bellatrix lifts me higher into the air and pulls me harder, my grip slipping ever so slightly. Again, she yanks me away, and again I lose a bit of my grip. But I can't let go of her. I can't let go of her now. She needs me.

With another strong pull, Bellatrix wrenches me away from Zoe and drags me farther away from her body before Disapparating with me, forever removing Zoe from my view. A moment later I find myself on my mother's bed in her room in the basement of Malfoy Manor. "Let go of me, let go of me!" I cry, trying to pull myself free from her. "I hate you!" I throw my elbows toward her, trying to free myself from her. "Let go of me!"

"Shh." She tightens her hold, and I give up fighting against her, my sorrow draining the fight out of me. I turn toward her, wrap my arms around her, and bury my face into her neck.

My mother holds me closely while I sob against her.