Lloyd Breakdown
It has been nearly a week since Lord Garmadon took over Ninjago City and a lot of the Ninja's allies have been taken into custody by the Sons of Garmadon, but right now in the hideout Lloyd was training with Nya, but something seemed off about this training.
Nya gave a couple of punches and some kicks but Lloyd wasn't attacking back and was barely guarding either, "Come on Lloyd!" Nya told the Green Ninja, "Staying on the defensive isn't enough anymore! You have to fight back!"
"I-I'm doing the best I can!" Lloyd said as he sloppily blocked a punch from Nya, only to get knocked on the ground.
"Come on Lloyd, this isn't like you." Nya said as she approached him. "When we train, you would actually try to fight back. But this time, you aren't." She said in concern. "Are you… okay?"
"I'm fine, I'm…" Lloyd then gave a sigh. "Let's just continue with the training so I can face my punishm- I-I-I mean, face my father." He corrected as he took a stance.
Nya gave a frown, having a feeling what was going on. Each day she saw the signs of grief and suffering from Lloyd, nightmares and crying at night, shifts to anger, hopelessness and sadness at random and now lack of progress in training. She wanted to talk to Lloyd about it but knows he'd just change the subject on her,
Nya gave a defeated sigh before getting into a fighting position. "Again." She ordered as Lloyd got into position as the two continued their 'Training'.
As she watched, Misako watched with her arms crossed and a solemn frown on her face, knowing what was going through Lloyd's mind right now. Rachel and Luci then went over to her.
"Concerned for Lloyd?" Luci asked.
"After what happened to Melissa and the others, he's been growing more… agitated, angry, barely eating or sleeping." Misako said in concern as she watched Nya knock Lloyd to the ground, again. "I wish I could help him, I know he's grieving, but this is so hard to watch."
Rachel and Luci gave concerned looks as Rachel sighed. "I may be an animal doctor, but I've also studied the human body as well." She said as she gave a concerned look. "I've seen other people who basically went through what Lloyd is going through now, but, I don't know if you wanna hear about what usually happens to those people."
"I think I already know." Misako said in dread as she watched her son 'train'. "But I know my son would never do anything like that… would he?" She asked what uncertainty.
"I hope not." Rachel said in concern.
Later that night, Nya was getting everything ready for her to get some sleep, she was about to lay down until she heard something, she turned around and saw Lloyd tossing and turning in sleeping with tears in his eyes, Nya gave a sad sigh seeing this. "I'm really sorry you're going through this Lloyd." She said softly.
But then, Nya saw Lloyd sat up rapidly, "Melissa!" He yelled and was wide awake. Nya quickly pretended to be asleep as Lloyd panted and looked around seeing the small resistance and frowned sadly, "I can't do this anymore." He said as he got out of his bed and made his way out of the room.
Nya sat up and gave a concerned frown as she got a bad feeling about what Lloyd was planning to do, and she couldn't let that happen, she then got out of her bed and began to follow Lloyd.
Nya followed Lloyd to the roof and she hid behind the door and saw him looking over Ninjago City, more specifically Borg Tower before he looked down and saw how high they were as he gave a sad sigh. "Melissa, I can't do this without you… I… I don't know if I can go on anymore." He said as tears went down his eyes. "Melissa, Mom, Nya, forgive me for this." He muttered to himself before he stepped on the edge of the building and was about to take another step forward.
"NO!" Nya yelled as she dashed forward, grabbed Lloyd, pulled him back and threw him back onto the roof as he rolled across the ground while Nya stood over him, "Lloyd Montgomery Garmadon! What, the fuck, are you, DOING?!" Nya exclaimed outraged by what he was trying to do.
"What does it look like, Smith?! I'm doing what I should have done from the start!" Lloyd snapped back with a glare as he stood up.
"Like hell you are!" Nya said, swinging her arm to the side, "Garmadon and Harumi are still out there and we have to-"
"Have to what? 'Fight back'?! 'Keep moving forward'?! 'Never give up'?!" Lloyd questioned. "There's no point anymore, Nya! Harumi won! She completely ruined my life! She made my father into a completely evil monster! She succeeded in breaking up me and Melissa! And even if there was a chance of us getting back together it's gone now because SHE'S DEAD!!!"
"You think I don't remember?!" Nya demanded, "News flash, Lloyd, I didn't! You wanna know why, because I lost both my boyfriend and my brother the same way! And it's because they're gone is why we need to keep fighting!"
"Oh sure, let's just march up to Borg Tower, somehow get past that giant stone monster! Fight through a hundred Sons of Garmadon goons! Three commanders with Oni Masks! The royal bitch that destroyed my life! And if we can get to my father, we just what? Splash some water in his face?! Because right now, that's all we have!" Lloyd ranted.
"We have Pixal, Dareth, your mom, Rachel and Luci!" Nya reminded, gesturing downstairs.
"Oh, like they're any help without powers! I should know, because I don't have any either!" Lloyd stated, pointing to his eyes before turning and walking away, "We can't use Spinjitzu! We don't have dragons! We've got no mechs, vehicles or allies because that Damn Ultra Violet is picking them off one by one!"
"Lloyd, you're acting like the people we have right now haven't done anything in the past that have helped us!" Nya said, marching up to them, "They've all helped save Ninjago, hell, even Dareth saved our skin once! They may not be the others but we can count on them to put up a fight."
"Oh I get it. You're thinking since we still have 'allies' what happened to Melissa and the guys doesn't matter. That we don't need them anymore!" Lloyd accused, turning to Nya, "But why should I be surprised, when I'm talking to the Samurai who went behind her boyfriend's back to flirt with some guy a machine told her was a better match for her."
"Don't you pin that on me!" Nya warned in a dangerous tone, knowing she shouldn't let Lloyd's words get to her.
"Why not? It's the truth isn't it!" Lloyd questioned, "Or has it still not sinked into that thick stubborn skull of yours that screwed things up with Jay and no matter what you do, everyone knows it still happened!" He said with a glare. "Everyone still knows that Nya Smith, the Water Ninja and Former Samurai X, will willingly spread her legs to some random guy if a machine tells her too!"
"Is it me you're talking about? Or is it yourself?" Nya questioned as Lloyd turned away with a look of anger and sorrow, "Are you just trying to turn your pain on me? The pain that you feel like this is still your fault? That you betrayed Melissa?! Well, I'll have you know that's just a load of bullshi-"
"Shut up!" Lloyd yelled out before he turned around and tried to punch Nya but she veered her head, grabbed his arm and threw him over her shoulder as he landed on his back.
"Lloyd! We are not doing this!" Nya told him firmly as Lloyd slammed his fist down.
"Yes. We. Are!" Lloyd yelled as he tried to attack her again but she kept dodging and countering him.
"Why do you keep doing this to yourself?!" Nya questioned as she kept dodging his attacks. "You know this won't change what happened!"
"Pain is all I have left!" Lloyd shouted as he tried to go for a punch but Nya caught it, "The pain makes sure I never forget that everyone is suffering because of me!"
"Because you went after your father?!" Nya asked as she dodged a kick from him, "I get it! You screwed up but that doesn't warrant everything that you've done to yourself!"
"Yes it does!" Lloyd yelled out as he tried to punch her again. "Everything that's happening throughout this God forsaken mission, is all my fault and I deserve every single pain that's thrown my way!"
"Bullshit!" Nya yelled to him in anger, "Are you forgetting that Harumi had me fooled?! Had us all fooled by her fucking game?!"
"Then you know the longer I live the longer everyone else suffers!" Lloyd told her as they continued to exchange blows, "I have to end this!"
"And what are the rest of us supposed to do without you?! Huh?!" Nya questioned. "If you die then our hope dies!"
"And if I do I can at least see her again!" Lloyd shot back.
"And what would Melissa say if she was here right now and saw what you're trying to do?!" Nya questioned.
"Why should I care as long as I can see her again?!" Lloyd demanded.
"And what about your mother?! Are you saying she's not worth living for?!" Nya demanded as Lloyd flinched back.
"I, I didn't say-" Lloyd tried to say as he just now remembered his mother.
"And what about me?! I just lost my brothers, my sister, my Sensei, my boyfriend all in one night! You're one of the only family I have left and you just want to go ahead and leave me too?!" Nya demanded as she looked away while crossing her arms, "Do you… Do you really hate me that much?!" She asked tearfully.
"What?! Nya no, I, I just…" Lloyd stammered, his anger fizzling out.
"You think you're the only one who doesn't miss them?!" Nya questioned sternly and tearfully. "We all do! I lost my brother and boyfriend! Pixal lost Zane! Rachel and Luci lost their daughter! And it kills me everyday that I couldn't do anything to save any of them!" She said sadly before giving Lloyd a look. "Do you really want everyone to lose hope?! Do you really want me to lose another brother?! Do you want your mom to lose her only son?! Do you really think Melissa would love a boy who killed himself?!"
"I… I…" Lloyd tried to say but couldn't get any words out before he fell to his knees. "I don't know, Nya, I just don't know what to do anymore." He said sadly, sounding close to crying, "I don't know what's right and wrong anymore, I don't even know what I am anymore, I... I feel so alone." He whimpered as Nya kneeled down infront of him.
"But you're not alone Lloyd, you still have your mom and me." Nya assured him.
"No, you don't understand Nya." Lloyd said as he wiped away his tears. "Growing up I had no friends, no family, nothing, just a lonely boy in a School that teaches evil and couldn't do a single goddamn thing right, it wasn't until I met Melissa, she was the first person who was ever nice to me, the first person who ever wanted to be friends with me. She didn't even care that I was the son of Lord Garmadon; she just wanted to be my friend, and because of her I was never alone. I loved every moment we had, the good, the bad and, sometimes the ugly," He said with a smile before frowning in sadness, "When I was with her I felt no matter where I was I'd be home, that I'd always find my way but now… She's gone, and without her… I don't know who I am anymore or what to do."
Nya was surprised to hear that and was also heartbroken. "Wow, I didn't know you felt that way about her." She said somberly.
"I don't care if she broke up with me, while yes I am sad about that, but as long as she's still my friend and still by my side I was happy." Lloyd said as he began to tear up, "But now we can't. And worst of all she died thinking that I betrayed her and I never… never…" He didn't finish what he was gonna say as he burst into tears.
Nya then wrapped her arms around him as she held him close. "It's okay Lloyd, I'm here. I'm here for you." She said soothingly. They stayed like that for a little bit before Nya felt Lloyd starting to calm down. "Feel better?" She asked.
"I don't know." Lloyd said numbly, "What should I do, Nya?" He asked.
Nya put a hand on his shoulder, "Maybe, turn to the family you do still have. Let her help you the only way she can," She advised with a gentle smile.
Lloyd looked at her for a moment before nodding.
As they headed down, Lloyd and Nya returned to the sleeping quarters where the others were still asleep. All except one that is.
Misako was sitting down with her arms crossed and her eyes closed, looking to have been waiting for them. "Sit." Misako told her son eveningly, more as an order than a request.
Lloyd flinched a bit when she said that before he sat down with Nya sitting not far behind. Lloyd faced his mother looking nervous while she still had her arms crossed and eyes closed, with tension so thick it could be cut with a knife. "Did you try to kill yourself?" Misako finally asks.
"Mom I-" Lloyd tried to say.
"Answer, the question." Misako cut off sternly, Lloyd opened his mouth to try and say something, but then he closed it and looked away in sadness and guilt, "Don't give me that look, young man. After what you did you should be courageous enough to give me a verbal answer: Yes or No?" She said,
"Y-Yes." Lloyd said quietly but loud enough for Misako to hear.
Misako then gave a hollow chuckle, "My son tried to commit suicide. Right when I was still sleeping," She said, looking away and gripping her arms, "Of course why should I be surprised? Did he not just lose his girlfriend, brothers, uncle and father all in one night, was nearly beaten to death by my own husband? Of course he felt he needed to end it all, it's not like I could be worth staying for." She said, her voice cracking as Lloyd looked at her.
"W-Wait, mom," Lloyd tried to say before Misako faced him with tearful glare.
"Did it really all seem that hopeless to you?! That joining Melissa and boys was more important than helping the people who are depending on you?!" Misako questioned before turning away and hugged herself, "Did you… Did you really hate me that much?" She asked in hurt and sadness.
"No! Mom! Of course I don't hate you!" Lloyd told her.
"Then why didn't you just talk to me, Lloyd?!" Misako asked him, "I was here! I've always been here! I knew you were hurting, I knew you needed help and I could've given it to you."
"I… I don't know, okay! I just… I don't know." Lloyd said, looking down in sadness and guilt. "After, after everything that's happened, after losing Melissa and the guys, I just felt so… lost. I didn't know what to do or who to turn to you."
"You think I don't know how that feels?" Misako asked as Lloyd looked to see her burying her face in her hands, "Do you know how many nights I woke up crying, knowing that your father was gone, that I could never be in his arms again? Of how hollow I felt knowing the man I loved more than anything had left?" She asked tearfully before clenching her first and shutting her eyes. "And because of that witch, he's now a monster, the man I loved no longer exists and now the only thing I have left of him… is you." She said, looking at her son as Lloyd looked at her in awe.
"I promised your father I would protect you from anything, that I would always be there when you needed me, to be strong enough to help… but, I failed." Misako said sadly.
"Mom I… I'm sorry." Lloyd apologized in sadness and guilt. "I… I don't have an excuse for what I nearly did anymore, what happened to Melissa, what happened to the others, and what Harumi did and what she said on that train cart… really messed with my head. I was just so turned around and torn apart that I forgot that, I still have one important person in my life." He said, smiling sadly at his mother.
Misako smiled back as the two embraced each other tightly, "I'm sorry." Misako told her son.
"I'm sorry too." Lloyd said to her. "I promise, next time I feel things are becoming, difficult, I'll come to you."
"Thank you, and I'm so sorry you're going through this." Misako said to him.
"I'll, try my best to make it through this." Lloyd said with a sad smile. "And again… I'm really sorry."
"It's okay." Misako assured him as the two continued to share a hug.
Nya watched the mother and son with a smile, she knows that Lloyd is having a really hard time after what happened to Melissa and the others, but he's slowly getting better and she vows to be by his side and keep him safe, because that's what Melissa would want.
A/N: And that was Lloyd's Breakdown, and damn, Lloyd is not taking what happened well at all, and if it wasn't for Nya he would've committed suicide, but thank God that didn't happen, but he managed to get through it… kinda, will Lloyd manage to keep himself together to face Harumi and Lord Garmadon? Find out in Hunted. I hope you all enjoy reading this short, leave a review and tell me what you think.
Here's the Cast List.
Sam Vincent as Lloyd; Kelly Metzger as Nya; Kathleen Barr as Misako; Veronica Taylor as Rachel; Alyson Court as Luci.