Toshiro's POV

I don't know when or why it happened, it just did. This girl came into my life in such a strange way. Normally, when Matsumoto would bring a weeping female shinigami into my office, I would look down and try my best not to listen to their "sad" story. Usually, the women, in my opinion, are overreacting. I've never once pitied any of them and I've never listened. But then came Rukia Kuchiki. I couldn't help but listen to her. And what made it even stranger was that I felt sad for her. It wasn't pity. I knew exactly how she felt. She was betrayed by someone she loved. Kurosaki pretty much ripped her heart away from her and stomped on it. She told him something that most would be too frightened to admit. He pretty much spat in her face that he hated her.

It's an awful thing to experience. I know very well. I never told Hinamori that I loved her. But I knew she wouldn't have cared, even if I told her. She was—and still is—in love—more like obsessed—with that traitor. Right at the very moment that she attacked me for Aizen, I knew. She would never love me the way I love—no, loved—her. It was a slap in the face. More than that, actually. She stomped on my heart, just like Kurosaki did with Rukia. The statement is such a cliché, but it is the best way to describe it.

I will never understand why Hinamori adores that man. He's killed hundreds of fellow shinigami and hurt even more. Hinamori is still mourning him.

But now Rukia has come into my life. I don't know what it is exactly that I feel for her. I'm still confused on what it is exactly. I don't know if it's like what I felt for Hinamori. I don't even know if what I felt for Hinamori waslove. I've always just assumed it was. But these feelings I have for Rukia, they're different, and, in a way, stronger.

Is it possible that I never loved Hinamori?

No, I must have. If I didn't, then why was I so hurt when she attacked me for Aizen?

But if I did love Hinamori, then I don't love Rukia. I already know that my feelings for her are different. But, at the same time, they feel stronger.

I looked down at Rukia's sleeping form. She's in my arms, still sound asleep. I would have never done something like this if it were Hinamori.

I sighed. Sometimes, I really, really hate having feelings.

My eyes found their way back to Rukia.

How many terrifying situations does she have to go through to finally have some peace? I'm not one to complain about the unfairness of life, but this calls for it. Life has been unfair to this girl for who knows how long. I don't know her well, but I know that much. I don't know much of her story—as in life—but the parts I do know are enough to make someone feel depressed. I will never understand why this girl never appears to be miserable.

She suddenly started to stir around. I looked down at her. What I saw sent a pain through me. It felt like a stab to the heart. I saw her pained face. My eyes wondered over to the note.

Was she dreaming of whoever wrote that malicious note?

Why would someone write something like that? I don't understand why it is that they're taking this so…personally. I don't believe Rukia is using her uncontrollable powers against this person.

How did I let myself be dragged into this? Oh, right, I offered my help.

Well, I might as well start doing something. Let's start off with motive.

I was about to get up. Then I remembered about Rukia. She looks peaceful when she sleeps. I don't want to wake her. This is probably the first time in a while that she's been able to sleep well. I've noticed the dark circles forming under her eyes. They were there the first night she came into here. I wonder what keeps her up at night.

Very carefully and slowly, I got off the couch. I set her down gently, back onto the couch.

I grabbed he note and went to the desk. I read the note, over and over again.

I sighed, already feeling another headache coming.

From what I have gathered, I think jealousy isn't their motive. I don't think they are afraid of being inferior to Rukia. Their "tone" used implies that they are—or think they are—superior to Rukia. But they don't like the idea of her rising in the ranks. But why? Why don't they want her to rise, to become stronger? If it's not jealously, then what could it be? The only other explanation for not wanting Rukia to get a higher position would be worry. But, from what I've read, that doesn't make sense.

The things said, things that were implied, they all make me believe this person has a grudge against her.

A grudge?

I picked up the note again and skimmed through it again.

Is that all you can do, Rukia Kuchiki? Bring shame to the Kuchiki name?

But if your secret about your true power or the rumor of the fake love affair got out, your Nii-sama's and his honorable clan's names would be tarnished.

This person seems to be mostly worried about the Kuchiki Clan. They use words that show they aren't the average soul reaper. And maybe they aren't even a soul reaper. They show high intelligence. And the things they called Rukia—street rat, trash, ungrateful—it suggests that they know about her past. They know about her. The fact that they called her ungrateful, it shows that they think they've given her something.

Given her something… like the Kuchiki name!

It all makes sense now. They are superior to Rukia. They know about her and her past. They took part in adopting her into the Kuchiki Clan. That's the grudge they have against her. It must be one of the Kuchiki nobles. The thought of it seems so ridiculous. I would think they have better things to do than torment Rukia. But this person must have always felt this way towards her. They must have never acted upon their hatred because they never had the chance. But somehow—who knows how—they found out about Rukia's secret and her training.

I stood up. I have to talk to Byakuya about this! He has to know! And he has to put a stop to this! It's his clan. Surely he'll have an idea about how it is that would do this.

Right then, Matsumoto barged into the room. She was obviously drunk.

"Captain, I know I'm late. But I have a really good excuse. You see…I…um…Is that Rukia-chan?" She gasped. "It is! Captain, you sly dog, did you—"

"Matsumoto, cut it out! Nothing happened." An image of what happened between me and Rukia just a while ago came into my mind. Well, almost nothing happened. "Anyway, I need you to stay here and look after Rukia. I need to talk to someone about something."

"Who? Talk about what?!"

I can't tell Matsumoto. Not only does she have a big mouth, but Rukia took a huge risk just coming to me, let alone telling me. "I can't say. And it's none of your business. Just take care of her, all right? She'll probably be waking up soon. If she asks where I went, tell her I might have figured it out."

"Huh? Figured out what? Tell me something, anything!"

"I can't." With that, I turned around and walked out of the room.

"Byakuya," I said once I was in his office, "we have to talk. Privately," I added, eyeing Abarai.

Byakuya sighed. "Please step out, Renji."

Knowing Renji, he would start complaining. But he must have known this was serious. He stepped out, without a word.

When he left and after a few seconds, Byakuya said, "What is this about?"

"It's about your sister."

He seemed to stiffen. I must have been imagining it.

When he didn't say anything, I continued. "It has come to my attention that someone has been—how should I say this—tormenting Rukia." I noticed too late that I had used her name instead of "Kuchiki" or at least "her." But it was just a slip. Even I don't know why I called her by her name. "Someone has been threatening her because…" Rukia didn't tell him about the training. There must have been a reason. It would be better to keep that part out of it. "Well, I don't really know. But I suspect it is one of the Kuchiki nobles."

I let my words sink in. There was only an eerie silence. Then finally, he said, "That is a bold accusation. What proof do you have?"

I can't tell him about the note. "Just, trust me."

He sighed. "Very well," he said. "You seem to believe quite strongly about this, and you've never given any reason to doubt your judgment. I will look into this." There was more silence. "Tell me, did Rukia come to you for help?"

The question caught me by surprise. "No." I decided lying about how she came to me would be better. "You see, she's friends with my lieutenant."

"So, she told Lieutenant Matsumoto?"

"No. Matsumoto noticed something was wrong. She told me about it. I convinced R-Kuchiki to tell me what was wrong," I lied.

"Hm, Lieutenant Matsumoto seems to be quite the friend. Make sure to give her my thanks."

"Right," I said. I turned around and headed to the door.

"And, Captain Hitsugaya," he said all of a sudden.

I look back at him.

"Thank you."

I blink. "It was…nothing."

Rukia's POV

When I woke up, the sun was setting and Captain Hitsugaya wasn't holding me anymore. I mean, he was gone. Matsumoto was there. I was happy to see her. But, at the same time, I was a bit disappointed Captain Hitsugaya wasn't there.

I had decided that staying was pointless. Before I left, Matsumoto had stopped me. She told me something that made me want to jump with joy. She told me that Captain Hitsugaya figured it out. She literally told me "Captain said he figured it out." He must have not told her. Thank goodness.

But now I don't have to think about it, hide it. He found out who did it that fast. I could trust him. He helped me. I don't have to worry about it anymore. I can forget about it and leave it in the past. I can continue my training with Captain Hitsugaya. I can train for the lieutenant position one day.

And, one day, I'll tell Captain Hitsugaya that I love him.

I smiled at the thought of it. A squeal left me. Soon, I found myself jumping too.

The thought of having a future where I'm the 13th Squad's lieutenant and Captain Hitsugaya and I are together was enchanting.

"Kuchiki?"

I screamed as I turned. "Ah, Captain Hitsugaya, it's you!"

"Yes. Are you…?"

"Um, yeah, I'm fine. Did you…?"

"Um, kind of," he said slowly.

I felt my face go red. "Oh, I'm so sorry! I just—"

I heard a small chuckle come from him. "Why are you apologizing? I take it Matsumoto told you?"

I nodded.

"Then you should be happy. I'm not going to stop you. You have nothing to worry about now. I might not have the same reaction that you did, but I'd be happy too."

I smiled, my face still red. "Um, Captain Hitsugaya?" I said reluctantly.

"Yes?"

"Thank you. Thank you so, so much. You have no idea how happy I am right now. I—"

The words left me at that moment. Captain Hitsugaya had lifted his hand to my cheek. He was wiping a tear that I didn't notice had fallen. After that, what seemed like thousands of tears left me. I didn't know why. I was happy, wasn't I?

He scoffed lightly. "Why are you crying? I thought you were happy."

"I thought I was, too," I choked out. "I'm—"

"Don't apologize," he whispered affectionately.

"I'm…I mean…" I scoffed at myself. "I'm so stupid," I whispered to myself.

Apparently, Captain Hitsugaya heard. "You are not stupid. Why would you think such a ridiculous thing?"

Maybe because it's true, I wanted to say. "I—"

I heard another kindhearted chuckle escape him. "You are so cute."

The words I was about to say chocked me. I looked up at him with wide eyes. He did not say that. I was imagining things.

That smile on his face says otherwise. It was the kind voice again.

"Did you…"

"Did I what? Call you cute? Yeah, I guess I did," he admitted with a smile.

Something took over me and made me stare right into his eyes. They were a beautiful green. I felt my eyes being locked onto his. I couldn't look away. I was mesmerized.

"And you know what?" he asked after a moment of silence. "You're a lot of other things."

Street rats, trash, whore. The words kept ringing in my head.

"You're sweet, strong, independent, kindhearted, brilliant, selfless. But you can also be stubborn. Especially when it comes to taking care of yourself," he said, his voice sad. "You don't want people worrying about you. Sometimes, it's an admirable quality. But sometimes it's taken too far. You, Rukia Kuchiki, take it too far. It's amazing to see you care so much for others. But, to you, you should come first. Remember that," he said as his hand came up and cupped my cheek.

"Captain…"

"Oh, yes, I forgot something. I listed only some of your admirable qualities. Those listed were the ones that stood out the most to me. But I forgot one very, very important quality. Rukia Kuchiki, you are so, so, very beautiful."

His words surprised me…but not as much as his next actions.

He leaned in close to me.

"C-Captain Hi-Hitsugaya…?"

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "But I can't stop."

Then, just like that, his smooth, pink lips brushed against mine. I reluctantly pulled back the smallest bit. He didn't care. He came even closer and smashed his lips onto mine.

I walked into my room, breathless. I closed the door and went to the window. I looked outside, my fingers skimming my lips.

Captain Hitsugaya…and I…we…I can't believe it!

I kicked of my sandals and socks then jumped onto my futon and hugged my pillow. I squealed into it.

"I can't believe it!" I silently yelled into my pillow. "How could this day get any better?! I am so happy! So, so, so happy," I continued. "I can't believe it! I feel like nothing could make me sad now! This is such an amazing feeling! He called me beautiful! He—"

Beep, beep! Beep, beep!

I looked up from my squashed pillow. I looked around for the source of the beeping. My eyes landed on my desk. An ominous, creepy glow came from on top of it.

I stood up and slowly, reluctantly walked to my desk. My hand slowly reached over for…my communicator? I stopped my hand instantly when I noticed that that communicator wasn't mine.

I'm not going to answer that. I should-I should go tell Captain Hitsugaya. He'll take care of it.

I looked away from the communicator and ran for the door. Right when I opened it, a terrifying laugh erupted through the communicator. But I didn't answer it…

"You silly, pathetic girl," a creepy, old-sounding voice said. "You think your problems have been solved? One kiss from a tramp and everything is fixed?"

"How did you—?"

He laughed wickedly again. "This is strike one!" he said more aggravated. "You were a fool to go to another rat for help. And you let him kiss you? You are a noble now! You will tarnish the Kuchiki name! Did you not understand anything from the note I gave you?!"

"I—"

"Listen, and listen well! You are going to go to Captain Hitsugaya right now to tell him that your training must and will come to an end. Then you will leave. Not one other word to him, understand?! You will never, ever speak to that tramp again. He might be a captain, but he is no noble. You will never speak to him. You won't even think of him.

"And you will terminate your friendship with Lieutenant Rangiku Matsumoto. She is a terrible influence on you. She is not someone to look up to. Look at you! A few days with her and you are back to being a whore!

"Heed my warning! You have two chances left. Do not let it become one chance left!

"I will call you on this communicator every now and then. Mostly to inform you if you are getting too close to losing another chance," he said bitterly. "Knowing you, it will be soon." He laughed maniacally again. "I will be keeping a closer eye on you, Rukia Kuchiki."

The call ended.

For what seemed like an eternity, I stared at the communicator.

I felt warm tears fall down my face. I shook my head.

This can't be happening! It can't! Captain Hitsugaya said he figured out who it was.

How?

How?

How?

The memory of Captain Hitsugaya wiping my tears flashed in my mind.

"Captain Hitsugaya," I silently sobbed. "Where are you? I-I need you. You-You said you fixed it. But…you didn't."

My knees buckled, making me fall onto the floor. A terrible sensation erupted in my stomach. I felt like I was going to be sick. My arms wrapped around my stomach. I bowed down in an attempt to numb the pain. It wasn't working. I wanted to scream.

The blackmailer's voice rang through my head. I covered my ears to make it stop. It was useless. His voice echoed throughout my mind. I squeezed my eyes shut.

You really are pathetic, said the hostile voice in my head. You heard what he said! Take your sorry self over to your lover. You don't want to make the blackmailer even more upset, would you?

At those words my head shot up. The voice is right. I have to go now! I want so badly to run into Captain Hitsugaya's arms again. But I can't. Not anymore. I made a mistake in trusting him. I'm down to two strikes. I can't afford to lose another one.

I got up and ran to the door. I ran past the garden and to the gates. Rocks, pebbles and twigs dug into my bare feet. I barely noticed. Cold drops fell onto my skin. Soon, I could feel the cold rain everywhere. I felt my breathing getting harder, raspier. It was getting harder and harder to breathe. I was getting dizzy. My vision was getting cloudy. The trees surrounding me twisted and turned. I was losing my footing. I felt myself wobbling this way and that way.

I struggled through it just so I could tell Captain Hitsugaya what the blackmailer wanted me to say.

I flinched when I felt a sharp pain radiating from my foot. I felt a hard pain everywhere soon after. I think I fell.

I clenched my fists. I have to get up. I can't give the blackmailer another reason to think I'm disobeying him.

I tried again and again to get to my feet. Every time, I ended up falling back down.

I have to…I have to…

What was I supposed to do?

I have to go to someone, right? But who?

No. I don't have to go anywhere. I'm so tired. I just want to sleep.

I opened my eyes but they instantly closed.

Whatever I was going to do can wait. I'm so tired.

I just want to sleep.

For a very

very

very

long

time.