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Preston headed instinctively for the hotel, a place of tranquillity where everything was in order and as it should be. It offered him a peace that he felt he could no longer have in his own home. Uncharacteristically, he ensconced himself at the bar and lost himself in numerous glasses of the house whisky. By the fourth or fifth glass, a pleasant glow had settled over him and the fear and worry had been pushed from the forefront of his mind.

He had just finished another glass, when he saw Andrew standing in the doorway. "Andrew!" he called out, waving his glass.

The other man hurried over, "Good evening Preston."

"You should congratulate me, Andrew," Preston said.

"Why's that?"

"Rebecca's pregnant." He smirked at the expression on his friend's face. "That's exactly how I felt." He put the glass back on the bar, motioning to the barkeep for another.

"That's…that's wonderful news," Andrew said carefully, sitting down next to him.

"No it isn't," Preston replied.

"I take it this wasn't planned."

He snorted. "Planned? My wife isn't supposed to become pregnant, Doctor Cook. My wife has a heart condition which makes any pregnancy extremely dangerous to her health. And I thought she understood and accepted that but no…." he shook his head, "no Rebecca thinks she knows better than anyone else."

"I see." Andrew shook his head as the barkeep asked if he wanted a drink.

Preston drained another whisky. "You know, I actually thought it was my fault. When she told me, I blamed myself for giving her a child…" Andrew looked uncomfortable, "but in reality…she did it to herself." He nodded. "That's right. She knew she wasn't supposed to get pregnant and she went and did it anyway." He laughed mirthlessly. "My father said she was forthright and headstrong and wouldn't be any good for me in the long run and he was right."

"I hardly think that's fair," Andrew said cautiously.

"No?" Preston looked at him, "How would you feel if you were me?"

"Well it's not really for me to say…"

"But I want to hear your opinion," Preston pressed, "How would you feel if you were me?"

"I suppose…I suppose I would be surprised and confused but…at the end of the day, Rebecca is having your child."

Preston visibly shuddered at the words. "Yes."

"Surely a part of you must be…happy?"

"You don't understand."

"But if you love her…"

"If I love her?" Preston turned angry eyes on his friend. "I love her more than anything in this world. I love her more than I could ever tell her. Don't you see, doesn't she see, that's why I'm so…so…?" he trailed off. "I can't lose her Andrew. I won't lose her, not over this."

"So what do you intend to do?"

"I wired Doctor Cassidy this afternoon and he advised me of the name of a doctor who could perform an abortion." Andrew looked shocked. "You don't approve?"

"Well I…"

"It's the only way," Preston nodded to himself.

"It's an extremely difficult decision to make," Andrew said slowly, "and one Rebecca must be fully in agreement with. The procedure is usually only performed when there is grave risk to the mother's health…"

"Which is exactly the situation here," Preston interrupted.

"Preston, a procedure like this is not an easy option. Women die all the time from complications."

"You sound like Michaela."

"You've discussed this with her?"

"She gave me the benefit of her opinion."

Andrew sighed. "Preston, I'm not married. I have no idea how I would feel if my wife were pregnant with the condition Rebecca has and therefore have no right to tell you what to think or do…"

Preston looked at him, "But?"

"But I've seen the way you are together. I know how much you love each other and I can't help but think that this could tear you apart if you're not careful."

XXXX

Rebecca had sat at the kitchen table for what seemed like hours waiting for Preston to come home. Every time she had managed to regain control of her emotions, a fresh wave of anguish would wash over her and she would find herself in tears again. She had let the fire die and hadn't bothered to light the lamps, so the house was in semi-darkness.

How could he want her to get rid of their child? How could he see that as being the ideal option? Every time she thought about it, she would think about the child growing inside her and feel an overwhelming love for it. Her son or daughter.

The sound of horses' hooves broke her out of her reverie and she got to her feet and rushed to the door, hoping against all hope that it would be Preston. It wasn't. She tried to hide her disappointment as Matthew climbed down from his mount.

"Matthew," she said, wiping her eyes viciously, "I thought…"

"Are you ok?" he asked, peering at her.

"Yes, yes I'm fine," she replied as cheerfully as possible. "What are you doing here?"

"Doctor Mike said you forgot to pick up your digitalis today," he said waving a package at her, "I said I'd bring it out."

"That's very…very kind of you," she said. "Do you want to come in?" Without waiting for an answer, she turned and hurried back inside the house, turning up the lamps and rebuilding the fire. She heard him follow her in and close the door behind her. "Tea?"

"No, that's ok," he said carefully, "Rebecca, are you sure you're all right?"

"Yes I'm…I'm…" before she could stop herself, Rebecca descended into a fresh wave of tears. She put her hands over her face and sobbed and, moments later, she found herself in Matthew's arms.

"What's wrong?" he asked, panicked, holding her against him. "Becca, please tell me."

"Becca," she echoed, pulling back and wiping her cheeks, "You haven't called me that for years. Not since you were ten and I was fifteen and you still couldn't roll your 'r's' properly." She looked at him and took a deep breath. "I'm pregnant."

Matthew paused for a long moment and she tried to read his expression, "That's…I'm happy for you. And Preston," he added quickly.

"I wish Preston was happy," she said, moving away from him and sitting down at the table. "He was so angry when I told him."

"Angry?"

"He's worried, I know that's all it is but…to ask me…to tell me to get rid of it…I just…"

"He told you to get rid of it?" Matthew echoed, clearly shocked. She nodded unhappily. "But…but it's your baby. It's your decision."

She let out a shaky sigh, "I'm not supposed to have children, Matthew. I shouldn't have…I shouldn't have done it."

"It's hardly your fault you got pregnant," he said supportively.

"Yes it is. I allowed it to happen."

It took a moment for her words to sink in. "Oh…"

She looked at him with tear-filled eyes, "Do you think I'm selfish?"

"I'm not sure it's for me to say…"

"But if it was you," she pressed, "if it was your child?"

Matthew sat down at the table opposite her and looked at his hands. "If you were pregnant with my child?" She nodded. "I'd be so happy. I'd be out there shouting it from the roof," he smiled at her. "Then I'd be making sure that you were all right."

"Preston wants to make sure that I'm all right," she said, "that's why he suggested the abortion…"

"I don't mean like that," he interrupted her. "I mean I'd be making sure that Doctor Mike was taking care of you and I'd be making sure that you rested and took care of yourself and the baby until it was born." He looked at her earnestly. "You and the baby would be the only things that mattered."

Rebecca gave him a watery smile, "You'll make some woman very happy one day, Matthew."

"Yeah well," he looked away, "Ingrid's dead, Emma's gone to Europe and you…well you're married."

"There's plenty of other women out there. You'll find someone to love and take care of."

"You think so?"

She reached over and covered his hand with hers, "I know so." He looked down at her hand over his and gently moved his thumb to brush along her skin. Then he looked up at her again and she instantly knew.

"Rebecca…"

"Don't," she said quickly, snatching her hand back.

"Just listen to me," he said, getting to his feet.

"No, Matthew, don't. Please don't." He crouched in front of her chair, his eyes alight. "Please."

"If Preston doesn't want you…"

"Stop it."

"If he doesn't want you," he persisted, "I do. I always have."

"Matthew…" Rebecca scraped her chair back and got to her feet, anxious to put distance between them. She moved over to the sink, but he followed her.

"You know how I feel about you, or if you don't you damn well should. All right so you're married to him, it doesn't matter. We could go away somewhere, somewhere far away where people don't know us. You could have the baby…"

"Please stop," she begged him, fresh tears starting to fall. "I can't handle this Matthew, please…"

He took her shoulders, "You could have the baby and we could bring it up together. It don't bother me that it's not mine. I love you." Before she could say anything more, he had taken her face in his hands and kissed her.

As his mouth and body pressed against hers, Rebecca closed her eyes…and felt nothing. There was no flutter in her stomach, no sudden state of arousal. He was a friend, someone she cared about, but he couldn't make her feel the way Preston did. He pulled away from her and looked at her expectantly.

"Matthew…" she said slowly, "I care about you…as a friend…but there can never be anything else between us. Please try to understand…" He stepped back from her. "I don't want to hurt you but I love Preston."

"And he wants you to get rid of your child!" he pointed out. "But you still love him?"

"Yes."

He looked at her and she could anger and pain in his eyes. "I don't understand you. I care about you. I'd look after you and the baby no matter what. Hell, I came all the way to Denver to your wedding hoping that…" he broke off.

"You said you had brought back a fugitive who skipped trial."

"Hell, I lied. I thought maybe you might decide that you didn't want to marry Preston after all. I thought maybe…" he stopped again.

"Oh Matthew, if I ever gave you the wrong impression, I'm sorry," she said, "You've been a true friend and I would never intentionally want to cause you pain. But you and I…"

"It's ok," he stopped her. "I get it." He moved over to the door, lifting his hat from where he had left it on the table. "I hope everything goes ok with Preston and the baby, whatever you decide." She watched him, unsure of what to say, wishing it could go back to the way it had been. "Good night Rebecca."

"Good night Matthew," she replied softly, then he was gone.

XXXX

Preston didn't return home that night so, the next morning, Rebecca dressed and made her way into town to try and find him. She assumed that he had stayed at the hotel but she knew that business would carry on no matter what else was happening, so she wasn't surprised to see movement in the bank when she arrived. The door was locked, given that it wasn't yet ten o'clock, but when she knocked, she heard footsteps on the other side and he opened it. Without saying anything, he opened it wider and stepped back to allow her to come inside.

"I thought I might find you here," she said, as he closed and locked it again behind her. "You didn't come home last night."

"I stayed at the hotel," he replied, brushing past her back to his desk which was strewn with paper.

"I thought as much." She sat down in the chair opposite and watched him as he returned to looking at whatever he had been doing before her arrival. "You're still angry with me."

Preston didn't lift his head, "Yes, I suppose I am."

"Preston…" Rebecca paused, unsure how to put across what she felt without giving away what had happened with Matthew the previous evening. "I've thought a lot about everything and…I understand why you're angry. It was wrong of me to put you through such torment last year when I refused to marry you only to turn around now and allow the one thing to happen that I was previously prepared to use to keep us apart. It was selfish and wrong and…and I see that now." He looked up at her but didn't say anything. "I may want this baby…but…" her voice broke and she felt tears spring into her eyes again, "but you are the only man who can make me feel…things…and I don't want to lose that. I don't want to lose you. So if having this procedure is what it takes to keep you, then I'll do it."

Preston's mouth dropped open and he stared at her for a long moment. "Why the sudden change of heart?"

Rebecca looked away, "I know what I stand to lose."

"You make it sound as though I threatened to leave you if you didn't do this."

She met his gaze, "Isn't that what you would do? Leave me? You kept your end of the bargain, Preston," she continued before he could answer. "I didn't keep mine. I'm in the wrong and I accept it. I'm willing to make amends for it but I need to know how you feel. I need to know that if I do this, that we can still be together."

Preston sighed and rested his forehead against the heels of his hands. "I never imagined we would actually find ourselves in this situation." He looked up. "But you did." She looked away. "Rebecca, you have to know that it's not that I don't want us to have a child. In an ideal world I would be ecstatic about becoming a father."

"Would you shout it from the roof?" she asked, echoing Matthew's words.

"Probably," he replied, "but this isn't an ideal world and I can live without being a father. What I can't live without, is you. I couldn't stand by and watch you put yourself through this. I'm confident in my mind that this is the only way."

She nodded, "Then I agree with you and I consent to having the procedure done. How soon can we go to Denver?"

"I can wire Doctor Cassidy this morning and we could be there by tomorrow."

Rebecca got to her feet. "Then do that. The sooner this is over with…"

"The better," he finished, standing up also. She could see the barely disguised relief in his face. He came around the desk and took her into his arms. "Everything's going to be all right," he promised her as she buried her face in his neck and willed away her tears. "I promise."

"I know," she whispered. "I know."

XXXX

Michaela knocked on the door of the Sheriff's office and let herself in. Matthew was sitting in the far corner, cleaning his gun. He barely looked up when she came in.

"Matthew," she greeted him, "is everything all right?"

"Fine," he replied shortly.

"Did you take the digitalis to Rebecca last night?"

"Yes."

Michaela paused, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he said, viciously rubbing the barrel, "nothing at all."

She came and perched on the desk in front of him, "I know you better than that, remember," she smiled, "what's bothering you?"

Matthew sighed, "Rebecca."

"What about her?"

"You know that she's pregnant?"

"Of course."

"And you know that Preston doesn't want it?"

"Oh, I see," Michaela sighed, "she told you?" He nodded. "I know that it's hard for us to understand…"

"She's having his child!" he raged at her. "He should be happy about it! He should…" he trailed off and shook his head. "I told her…I asked her…"

"What?"

"I told her that I loved her," he said quietly, "I asked her to leave here with me and have the baby." He looked up into Michaela's shocked face. "But you don't have to worry because she said no."

"Matthew, Rebecca's a married woman. You can't just go around…"

"I don't care!"

"Well you should! You had no right to put her in that position! She's confused and upset enough without you declaring inappropriate feelings for her!"

"You don't know what you're talking about," he slammed his gun down on the table. "You don't know how I feel about her."

"Yes I do. I do know how you feel about her and if she wasn't married to Preston then it would be up to you what you wanted to do with those feelings. But she is married to Preston and you can't change that, even if you wanted to and even if she wanted to." She put her hand on his arm. "I know it's difficult when we want someone we can't have but you have to accept it and move on. There are plenty of other, available women, out there."

"That's what she said," he replied ruefully.

"She's right. Don't let this damage your friendship with her." He nodded, unconvinced. "Will we see you for supper this evening?"

"Sure."

"All right then." Michaela stepped back outside and let out a long breath. As she did so, she saw the door of the bank opening and Rebecca came out, followed closely by Preston. The former looked as though she had been crying and she noticed that Preston put a comforting hand on her back as they began to walk in the direction of the station. Curious, she decided to follow them and watched as they made their way to the telegraph office. Preston stepped up to the hatch and spoke to Horace while Rebecca hung back. After a few moments, he joined her and they began coming back towards her.

"Michaela," Preston greeted her, touching his hat.

"Preston, Rebecca." Michaela noticed the other woman couldn't quite meet her gaze. "Is everything all right?"

"Fine," Preston replied, "Rebecca and I were just making plans to travel to Denver later this afternoon."

"Denver?" Michaela looked at Rebecca.

"Yes. Rebecca's agreed to undergo the…procedure. She agrees with me that it's the best thing for everyone."

"Rebecca?"

Rebecca looked up, "It's for the best, Michaela," she replied softly. "It really is for the best."