There was too much running through my mind. I could barely hold onto my reality. I was beginning to feel as if I was stuck in between dreams and the real world. The last thing I remember was a man's strength grabbing me from behind before it all went dark. I only had a few seconds to react until I was completely limp. My body had been kept in the hands of someone I was terrified to see. He had placed something over my mouth that caused me to feel dizzy and sleepy. I only heard his voice tell me to be still as I was going under. I replayed his voice in my head but I wasn't sure if I really knew it. Maybe I just wanted to remember it so I'd feel better than being taken by a stranger.
It was night time when I was taken. I look around the room but no sunlight comes through the window. I'm laid on a bed big enough for five people. I see a window next to my bed. Curious to know where I am, I go see what's outside of it. As I'm getting out of bed, my eyes catch onto my clothes. I am wearing an oversized shirt. I lift up the shirt to see I only have panties on under it. I'm in all black. I pause. Someone changed my clothes. Did a man really undress me? That thought made my head explore even more thoughts… very bad thoughts. Did a man see my naked body while I was unconscious? What else did he do with me? Please don't let this be happening to me. I try to adjust my breathing back to normal. I need to see where I am.
Walking over towards the window, I look down. My eyes only see very high trees, the moon, and what seems to be a very big field. There are definitely no signs of any neighbors. My window has to be on the third floor. My own house had my bedroom on the second floor. This appears higher. The window was quite small, maybe the size of a car window. I could fit through but I would break my bones trying to jump. I tried to open it. Unlike most windows, this one opened sideways. It only gave a little. It would go no further than a few inches. I accept this will not be my way out.
I look back around the room. There is a fireplace and another window over by a door. I try to move as quietly as I can without being too slow. As I shuffle over to the window, I realize it is the same as the other. My head drops in defeat. I look to my right where the door is. This is not a way out but a bathroom. No windows at all in this bathroom. My last place to attempt an escape is the main door to this room. I pace myself walking over, as I do not know who or what might be on the other side. I slowly place my hand around the handle. I place my ear to the door to see what I might hear on the other side. It is quiet. I attempt to turn the handle but it won't move. Of course it wouldn't. Someone obviously wants me to be kept here against my will. Why would it possibly be unlocked?
I look back around the room. I want to see if there is something I can use as a weapon. There is a dresser across from the fireplace. I see nothing on top of it. I open the drawers to see only clothes. Looking through the shirts, I realize they are only mens. I pull a shirt closer to my nose. This scent is the same as the one I'm wearing. It is comforting when I close my eyes to inhale but other than that, I am lost for words. I place the shirt back inside the dresser. As I close the drawer, my ears listen to footsteps approaching. They are coming up some steps outside the room. I run back to the bed on my toes, before quickly putting myself under the covers. I try to relax my breathing. I need to pretend to be asleep. My fears are having their way with me.
Someone is using a key to get in. I turn on my left side so my back will be to them. This is terrifying. The door opens. A moment passes without any sound of feet moving over to me. They are just standing there. What do they want? My head is under the blanket, hoping they do not approach. My eyes forced tightly shut. I almost forgot to breathe. I slowly inhale and exhale. I have to look like I'm sleeping still. That's when I hear the door close and lock. The only difference is… whoever locked it is still in here with me. I can't prevent the tears escaping my eyes. I'm bracing myself to be grabbed. Please don't hurt me. I know he is much stronger than me. I am not prepared. I hear a man's breath release. His feet slowly walk over to me. The floors creak beneath him. I feel a hand brush gently against my arm. That hand rests on my arm as another begins to slowly pull the cover from over my head. This is where I was sure I was no longer breathing. He stopped pulling the cover down around my upper arm, right above where his other hand was still placed. I swallowed hard. He was just standing there above me, hovering. Did he know I was not asleep? My tears were still fresh on my face but there's no way he would notice that in this dark room.
I felt his knee push onto the bed behind my back. He was holding himself over me. His grip on my arm appeared to be getting tighter. I felt his other hand rest on my head. He was stroking my hair. He began approaching me closer as he bent down to me. His breath could be felt on my face. I breathed him in, unaware of what was going to happen next. He could be heard inhaling my scent. He was breathing me in. I was debating whether I should just open my eyes, but out of fear, I don't think I could make them. He placed a kiss on my head, then he brought his lips to my ear.
"Open your eyes for me," his voice penetrated my thoughts as his finger wiped away my tears. He knew I was awake. Out of fear, I tried to pull from him to get off the other side of the bed. I heard a hard struggle escape his mouth as he forced me back to him. His grip was much worse now. He had me beneath him now. Both his knees on either side of my thighs. One of his hands held onto my left wrist. The other hand grasped around my throat. The only thing I could do was keep my eyes closed and remain still.
"Nyla…," he said, his breathing intensifying. "Look at me!" He screamed to me as he gripped my throat tighter. My eyes shot open immediately.
There he was. His short black hair covered his forehead slightly, as he leaned over me. His muscles bulged out his arms as he held onto me. His eyes remained dark as if they carried such anger and frustration within them. I could catch a hint of softness in them though. Once I looked at him, he let out a sound of relief. He wanted me to see him that bad? I knew this man. This was Jake.
Jake was someone I used to hang out with growing up. He would always be around his friends though. They were mainly like brothers to him. I only saw him every now and then as we got in our later years of high school. He stopped coming around eventually. I thought he moved without saying goodbye. It had been almost a year since I last saw him. He was much bigger now and very strong. He scared me.
I looked at him with fear and pain. He began to release his grasp on my throat. That hand caught the side of my face instead. "I've needed you for so long… You don't understand how it feels to finally have you to myself."
I could feel the panic attack causing an uproar inside of my chest. My breathing was all over the place. What happened to him? He used to be gentle and I was never afraid of him. We were best friends for years.
"Jake?" I barely gasped out. He looked at me with a more softened face now. "Where are we? What have you done?" I asked wearily.
He never took his eyes off of mine. "You're where you need to be… with me. I've never let you go Nyla. I just needed time. I needed time to figure things out with myself and with us. I had to put things into motion before I could get you though. Now I have you." His voice didn't even sound like his anymore. He appeared to be someone else entirely. I took in what he said.
"What do you mean? Where have you been?"
"I've been around. I never left Forks. I only kept myself away from your sight. I always saw you though. I never left."
"…Jake I don't understand. Do you want to hurt me? I don't recognize you."
His face hardened again. Maybe I said the wrong thing. "Hurt you? I want you Nyla. Didn't you ever see that? I needed you to be mine but it became so heavy inside me. I was afraid to do the wrong thing when around you. I needed time to think it through. You wouldn't have been prepared regardless. I had to take you." His eyes searched mine for a response. He was reading me.
"…It was you who took me? I was out walking and a car appeared beside me. I was grabbed from behind and went unconscious."
"I had someone take you for me. I wasn't sure if I could do it right . Seeing you like that would've sent my head racing. I needed a clear mind for when you got here." His head brought itself down to mine. He placed his forehead on mine, breathing into me. His eyes still locked with mine, he brought his lips to me.
I couldn't close my mouth fast enough. His tongue pushed through my mouth. The force behind this kiss was extreme. It was as if he couldn't be without me. I was in shock but still tried to push him off. I begged him to stop with my body language. My words could not really be used. This only led to him restraining me. His big hands held down my wrists. My eyes looked over to his muscular arms. They were extreme in size compared to my slender appearance.
"Stop fighting me!" he roared out.
I wouldn't stop trying though. I needed to get away from him. He had people working with him. He wasn't alone in this. Who else was there? Was it his brothers? Were they okay with this? I tried to force my head from his but he snatched it back. His hand tightly held my jaw. He was still inside my mouth. I could feel all of him in me. This was dehumanizing. Who was this beast? I began to cry again. I wanted him to stop violating me. He didn't care. His tongue touched every part of my mouth. I could only taste him. I wanted to fight him. I needed to run.
I took my free hand and snatched his hair hard. He yelped in what seemed like shock, not pain. He immediately grew this smile across his face and began softly laughing. He was seriously crazy. Either it wasn't painful or he liked pain. His head was only cocked back slightly from my grip on him. He yanked his hair out of my grip and smacked me. It wasn't a little slap either. It stung badly and my ear was ringing. His face was back to showing anger and frustration. He sat up , still sitting on his knees above me. He just looked at me. Nothing more, nothing less. He was thinking something though. I knew that. My hands tried to shield my face from him. I didn't want to be kissed or slapped again. My eyes looked at him through my fingers. This man was a monster.
"You really shouldn't make me angry Nyla. I don't do well with you going against me, and neither will you. You are mine. You won't be without me. I'm here now. You have me… and I have you."
My mind went blank. There was no easy way of getting out of this, was there? I was his hostage. He was my captor. I needed to go about this differently. He needed to see me as not going against him.
"…I'm sorry Jake. I don't want to go against you. I'm just scared of you. I'll do what you want, okay?" I insisted weakly.
He still remained sitting over me. I could not read his face. If anything , I felt like I was going to be slapped again. He looked at me up and down. His mind was running around so many thoughts.
He got up from the bed with his back to me as he stood there. He had on a black shirt, same as mine. His pants were dark grey sweats. He turned back to me. I was still laid in a vulnerable position, too afraid to move now.
"Come to me," he pleaded almost desperately.
I sat myself up and hung my legs over the edge of the bed. I looked up at him, my head slowly turning up to him. He looked at me, waiting. I stood up for him. He came up to me in a few steps. My head remained looking down. His hand ran down my arm as the other stayed on my other shoulder. His hand didn't stop on my arm. It was traveling down to my waist. He firmly held onto it. I whimpered a little. His breath intensified down the side of my neck. He was wanting to do something so badly. He was testing me. I remained still as his hand began to go further down my body. Now he was to my thigh, hand creeping under my shirt. His skin was burning compared to mine. It was soothing but also frightening. My body was shaking. I wanted to back away so badly. It took so much in me to stand still and let him continue. His hand found my waist on the inside. It gripped my side. He was going to do something bad.
"…Jake…," I whimpered out.
"Shhhhh…It's okay," he said as he pulled me to him closer by my waist.
His hand tightened on my skin. My head rested on his chest. He was so warm and hard against me. He began backing me up. My legs reached the bed as he pushed me down onto it. He began pulling up my shirt to uncover my whole body. I asked him with my eyes to please stop this. He only looked at me with denial. He was going to get his way. He stared at my boobs and stomach. His eyes made their way down to my panties and legs. He was inspecting me? Had he not already seen me earlier when putting me in these clothes?
"Stay," he demanded harshly as he walked over to the fire place. He started a fire as I watched the flames flicker and dance all over the walls in a shadow. He came back to me.
I hesitated and moved an inch, as if I were trying to pull myself away from him. He noticed before I caught myself. I didn't want to try and reject him. It was instinctual. He paused over me, just waiting to see what I might do. I said nothing. His expression looked curious and ready to come at me if needed. After another moment, he removed his shirt. He hovered over me now, his chest and stomach highlighted with the flames to the left of us . I could see his expression more now. He looked deadly. He was not playing with me and was very set on having me.
He came down to my mouth, waiting for me to open. I slowly began to open it and he liked that. His lips touched mine, full of lust and desire. I wasn't kissing back. He removed his lips and stared at me. I had to kiss him back. I swallowed. I can do this. I opened my mouth again and as his tongue touched mine, I moved mine around his. He exhaled into my mouth. He loved this. He began sucking my tongue as if needing the taste of me all to himself. His saliva was all over mine. Mine over his. We were kissing and licking one another's mouth for several minutes. All I heard was our heavy breathing, the fire crackling, and our saliva being exchanged. My mouth and lips felt bruised just from this. My lips were almost numb.