I do not own Thomas the Tank Engine & Friends. They are strictly both he property of both the Awdry Family and the late great Britt Allcroft herself, this story is purely for entertainment and never profit.
Episode 51: The Diseasel, Original Airdate: December 3rd, 1986
It was a bright Saturday afternoon on the Island of Sodor. Edward, BoCo, Bill and Ben were visiting the Billinton's at Ffarquhar. Thomas after all was glad to see his mentor figure and their friend BoCo, Bill and Ben however not so much.
The reason was because Bill and Ben were both the biggest nuisances on the North Western Railway, often playing jokes on the other drivers and teasing them. This would sometimes get them into trouble with both their manager and Sir Topham Hatt, they were even banned from the Billinton house after they nearly burnt it down after one of their pranks went wrong. However, Bill and Ben both promised that they weren't pull any pranks, a promise that Thomas and Howard were both sceptical of.
However, Edward and BoCo assured them that they'd keep a close eye on the twins and make sure that they didn't pull any of their usual bullshit. But as usual, Bill and Ben were going to pull one of their usual pranks. Thomas was in the kitchen getting some apple juice for Lucy, who was playing in the sitting room with Bill and Ben, something Thomas didn't feel comfortable with due to their mischievous nature and irresponsibility.
Thomas then came into the sitting room with Lucy's apple juice when his eyes widened in shock. There was Lucy sitting on her playmat with a bottle of beer in her hand, Bill and Ben were watching the whole thing.
"BILL, BEN" said Thomas angrily.
The two twin drivers turned and noticed Thomas standing there with an angry look on his face. They ignored and instead just grinned at him.
"Oh hi there Thomas" said Bill.
"We didn't hear you come in" added Ben.
Ignoring the two twins, Thomas made a beeline for Lucy before taking the beer bottle from her.
"Apple juice daddy" protested Lucy as Thomas took her drink.
"No sweetie" said Thomas sternly, "this is apple juice for adults. Something these two idiots shouldn't have been letting you drink".
"Letting Lucy drink what?" as Edward as he and BoCo both entered the sitting room.
"This" said Thomas crossly as he showed them the bottle in his hand.
BoCo went up to Thomas and snatched the bottle from his hand and looked over it with Edward, the two drivers both looked at the twins with shock and then anger.
"Bill Ben" said Edward crossly, "you two gave a toddler alcohol".
"What the fuck where you two actually thinking?" asked BoCo crossly, "especially after you two said that you were going to behave yourselves".
"Come on its not really beer BoCo" said Bill.
"Yeah taste it" suggested Ben.
BoCo looked at the beer bottle in his hand suspiciously be taking a sip, his eyes widened when he realized what it really was.
"This is apple juice" he said to Thomas and Edward.
"What" asked Thomas as he took the bottle from BoCo and took a sip himself.
When he realized that BoCo was right and that it was apple juice and not beer, Thomas gave Bill and Ben dirty looks.
"Explain why you tried to fool me" he asked in a calm and dangerous tone of voice.
"We thought that it would be funny" said Bill with a cheeky grin.
"And we sure got you good Thomas old boy.
A second later the door to the Billinton house was opened, Thomas and BoCo both pushed Bill and Ben outside, whilst painfully twisting their nipples.
"Ow, ow, ow" said the twins.
"Maybe this will serve the two of you right for tricking Thomas into think you were giving Lucy beer" said Edward sternly.
Once Bill and Ben were out of the house, Thomas and BoCo let go of the twins' nipples before the former slammed the door shut in the twins faces. Afterwards Thomas, BoCo and Edward went back into the sitting room and sat down on the couch, with Lucy on Thomas' lap.
"Honestly" said Thomas exasperated, "why can't Bill and Ben go through one day without prank people?".
"To be perfectly honest with you Thomas I really don't know" replied Edward.
"I swear to God that their tricks are going to get them killed one day" added BoCo.
"I swear those two can drive people nuts," said Thomas.
"Like the time they first met you BoCo?" asked Edward.
"That's right" said BoCo, "after I taken their trucks by mistake".
"Say did you ever tell Lucy that story Thomas?" asked Edward.
"No I didn't Edward" replied Thomas.
"Story daddy?" asked Lucy excitedly.
Thomas, Edward and BoCo all smiled, if there was one thing Lucy loved more than anything was her father's stories.
"Story Lucy" said Thomas as he turned to Edward and BoCo, "you two like to hear?".
"Take it away Thomas" smiled Edward.
"I've heard a lot of these stories" said BoCo, "I'd very much like to hear one of them myself".
"How about I tell them about you and Bill and Ben's first meeting BoCo?" asked Thomas.
"Go right ahead" replied BoCo.
"Right then" said Thomas as he looked down at Lucy, "this story began when Uncle BoCo here was first hired for the North Western Railway".
(Story Begins)
Bill and Ben Bagnall are twin tank engine drivers who worked for the Sodor China Clay Company at Brendam. Their engines were a pair of Bagnall saddle tank engines, both had small wheels, a tiny chimney and dome and a squat cab.
The two drivers had a reputation for being the most mischievous drivers on the North Western Railway, often playing tricks on the other drivers, which could sometimes lead them into trouble. It was said that the only three people who could keep them in order were Edward, Sir Topham Hatt and the Clay Pits Manager.
Their trucks were filled with China Clay hosed from the grounds, it is needed for pottery, paper, paint and many other things. The twins are always kept busy, bringing trucks down from the Clay Pits for either Edward, Henry or any of the other drivers on the mainline and for the ships in the harbour.
One morning Bill and Ben both arranged five trucks of China Clay at Brendam Docks each and went away for more. When they returned half an hour later, they were both surprised to find that the trucks had gone. As they tried to wrap their heads around at how their trucks could have disappeared to, Bill noticed something on the ground between the rails. Both twins realised that it was a patch of oil, but where had it come from.
"Say Ben where did that patch of oil come from?".
"Couldn't say" replied his twin.
Just then a dockworker by the name of Harry came up to them. Harry knew Bill and Ben very well and noticed their puzzled expressions and was about to ask them what the situation was when he noticed them looking at the patch of oil and realised that it must have come the big green diesel who had dropped by the docks earlier that morning.
"That's a diesel" he told the two twin drivers.
"It's a what'll?" asked Bill.
"A diseasel I think" replied Ben, "there's a notice about them at the Clay Pits".
"Coughs and sneezes spread diseasel's" said Bill.
"You had a cough yesterday" said Ben with a sly grin, "its your fault the diseasel came".
"It isn't," said Bill.
"It is" replied Ben.
"Stop arguing" laughed Harry, "why don't you two go and rescue your trucks".
Bill and Ben were horrified by the motion by this.
"But the diseasel will magic us away like the trucks" insisted Ben.
"He won't magic you guys" replied Harry, "you'll more likely magic him. Listen he doesn't know that you two are twins, so take off your name tags and your engines numbers and here's what you'll do".
Harry then explained his idea to Bill and Ben who smiled mischievously. Afterwards they took of their name tags and their engines numbers, they then hopped into their engine cabs and set off on their journey to find the diesel. They were both looking forward to playing tricks on him, soon they came to Wellsworth where they knew where the diesel would mostly likely be and they were right. Creeping into the yard, they found the diesel on a siding with the missing trucks. Ben hid behind, but Bill went boldly alongside. The diesel driver was a tall man in his early thirties with black hair and a broad build, he was having his lunch when he noticed Bill looking at him with a grin on his face.
"Do you mind?" he asked.
"Yes" said Bill, "I want my trucks back please".
"These are mine" said the driver, "go away".
Bill pretended to be frightened, but in truth he wasn't.
"You're a big bully" he whimpered, "you'll be sorry".
Bill then ran back and hid behind the trucks on the other side. The diesel driver just shook his head and went back to his lunch, but then Ben now came forward much to the driver's surprise.
"Truck stealer" hissed Ben.
Ben then ran back behind the trucks, the diesel driver just shook his head again as he tried to ignore it. However, Bill then took Ben's place again and then Ben came back again. This went on and on until the diesel drivers' eyes nearly popped out.
"Stop your making me giddy" he said trying to keep himself balanced.
Bill and Ben both hopped down from their engine cabs and stood next to the diesel driver, when he finally calmed down, he noticed that Bill and Ben were standing next to each other, allowing him to get a proper look at them.
"Are there two of you?" asked the diesel driver.
"Yes" Bill and Ben both said at the same time, "we're twins".
"I might have known it" he muttered with a smile.
Just then Bill and Ben noticed Edward coming up to them. Edward hopped down from his K2 cab and walked up to them.
"Bill and Ben" he asked, "why are you playing here?"
"We're not playing" protested Bill.
"We're rescuing our trucks" squeaked Ben, "even you don't take our trucks without asking, but this diseasel driver did".
"There's no need to be rude" said Edward, "this bloke's engine is a Metropolitan Vickers, Diesel Electric Type 2".
The twins were abashed at this.
"We're sorry mister uh?" asked Bill.
"That's alright" smiled the diesel driver, "call me BoCo. I'm sorry I didn't know about the trucks".
"That's all right then" said Edward, "now off you go Bill and Ben. Fetch BoCo's trucks and then you can take this lot".
"Right away Edward" said Bill and Ben at the same time".
Bill and Ben then both hopped into their caps and headed off to fetch BoCo's trucks for him, leaving him and Edward alone. After the twins left, Edward turned to BoCo.
"There's no real harm in them" said Edward, "but they are maddening at times".
BoCo chuckled at this.
"Maddening" he said, "it the word".
(Story Ends)
"And after that" said Thomas to Lucy as he finished his story, "Uncle BoCo here became the fourth person who could keep Uncles Bill and Ben in line".
"Well that was a good story Thomas" said BoCo, "it was as good as the ones Edward told me about".
"Glad you liked it BoCo" said Thomas with a smile.
"You know despite their mischievous nature" said Edward, "Bill and Ben really don't mean any harm".
"Well you're right there Edward" replied Thomas, "maybe we should let them back into the house".
"That we should" replied BoCo.
But just as Thomas was about to stand up to go and let Bill and Ben back into the house, he, Lucy, Edward and BoCo heard an enraged Scottish voice.
"COME BACK 'ERE YE WEE BASTARDS" bellowed the enraged Scottish voice.
Realizing that was either Donald or Douglas' voice, Thomas, Edward and BoCo went to the window to see what was going on. Sure enough they saw Donald and Douglas chasing Bill and Ben with a pair of claymore swords.
"Come on now Donald and Douglas came" Bill's panicked voice, "we know we don't mean any harm".
"MAYBE TELL THAT TO POOR HAMISH" bellowed Donald and Douglas at the same time.
AS Donald and Douglas chased Bill and Ben with their swords, Thomas, Edward and BoCo watched with shock.
"Okay may I spoke too soon" said Edward.
"We better stop Donald and Douglas before they turn Bill and Ben into a pair of kebabs" suggested BoCo.
"That we should" agreed Thomas.
After leaving Lucy with Tanya, Thomas, Edward and BoCo both left the house to chase after Donald and Douglas.
And done, sorry if it took a month but as I said I was doing work on my animated series for DC Comics. But I must say that I'm pleased with how this chapter turned out. In reply to your question zachhoevel, I'm afraid that I don't work for DC Comics, I'm writing the series so that I can send it into them and hopefully get it made. As for our favourite DC heroes and villains, I plan to have guest appearances from Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, Flash, Green Arrow, Green Lantern, Martian Manhunter, Shazam, Robin, Nightwing, Batgirl, Alfred Pennyworth, Commissioner James Gordon, Swamp Thing, Zatanna, John Constantine, Etrigan the Demon, Joker, Two-Face, Catwoman, Penguin, Lex Luthor, Darkseid, Gorilla Grodd and Black Adam. Also, the Robin in my series will be Jason Todd as it will be mostly 1980s, with a lot of references to 80s songs and pop culture. Anyway, please be so kind as to leave a preview and as always, see you all next time.