Chapter 40: Extra — And Elsewhen

Warning: Abortion, Suicide, Infant death

Six and a half years ago…

Bulma was reviewing security footage half slumped over the desk.

Dr. Brief opened the door.

"Oh, here you are. Your mother and I have been looking everywhere for you. … You look like the walking dead. You and Yamcha left a giant mess in the living room. That's not like you two." He then stuck his head out into the hallway. "PANCHY! SHE'S OVER HERE!"

"COMING!" came softly from the hallway.

Panchy arrived moments later panting. "Bulma, sweetie, what happened last night? The room's a mess. Did you and Yamcha get into a drunken fight again? I don't remember him being over since your last fight over a month ago."

"Uh… it wasn't Yamcha. It was Vegeta…" she said, slumped over and henpecking the keyboard.

"Vegeta actually touched alcohol?" Panchy said surprised.

"Yeah, I got him to have one… maybe a couple… I don't remember… I just remember how he reacted… I can't figure out why…"

"Reacted to what? The alcohol? Is he ok?" Dr. Brief asked, worried.

"I flirted with him like normal, but he just said no and ran. Like really ran… It's not like he's gay. Is he gay? No, that can't be it…"

"Bulma, stop using him to make Yamcha jealous," Dr. Brief said frustrated. "Yamcha hates that man with a passion and even Vegeta can see your BS and he understands very little about Earth."

"I finally got him to drink though," Bulma smiled through the hangover.

The two glanced at each other at her clear brag.

"Bulma," Dr. Brief sighed and put his hand on her shoulder, "What times were you drinking with Vegeta? I'll look. You just rest. If even half those cans were yours, you're probably still more drunk than hungover."

"Oh no. I already found that," Bulma waved him off. "I'm looking over other stuff to try and figure out why he did that… It was so weird… I mean, I almost got to first base, but he just… well look," Bulma tapped on the keyboard and messed with the mouse.

A six screen came up on the large monitor, two were of the messed-up room, four were hallway shots.

Bulma had already been drinking like a fish and throwing the empty cans around between crying and fits of rage. Vegeta came in in just his shorts having come from the GR like he normally did around midnight after dinner break.

Vegeta dogged a can that impacted the wall behind him.

"Oh, Vegeta…" Bulma said, wobbling on her feet. "Didn't see you there."

Vegeta stuck his head in the archway. "What the actual fuck woman? Looks like I was in here."

Bulma started to laugh, "Yeah. I guess it does…"

Vegeta crossed his arms, "So what expensive experiment blew up that I did not cause?"

"Nothing. Yamcha and I had another fight."

"All this over that weakling?!" Vegeta said surprised. "What did he do? Kill that black animal that keeps trying to snuggle with me?"

Bulma snorted. "No. Scratch is fine. We just… fought…"

Vegeta sighed and stared at her while she went back to the couch.

Then to the two's surprise, he went into the room.

He leaned on the back of the couch, startling Bulma.

"Is there some law or unbreakable social custom that keeps you tied to him? Because no depraved desires are worth what I've witnessed being here. My understanding is that your nobility and he's literally someone you picked up off the street. Go search the alleyways for another toy."

"No. No laws or anything. It's not that simple…"

Vegeta walked around, brushed the cans and burnt cigarettes off the leather couch, and sat.

"Then explain this to me. I did not rebel against Frieza just to get stuck in another dysfunctional military. If the power level differential is too big, there's always poison. After 25 years, I don't want another three."

"We've been together since I was 16. We fight, we break up, we get back together, rinse and repeat."

Vegeta looked surprised. He looked her up and down, then scooched farther away. "How old are you?"

"31."

"What?!" Vegeta grasped the air in frustration. "That's 15 years, woman. And you're supposed to be some kind of super genius."

Vegeta looked away clearly disgusted. Then he looked thoughtful. "That sounds like an addiction. Have you thought you might be being secretly drugged?"

"No. That's not it," Bulma said, cracking open another beer and throwing her head back.

Vegeta looked around at the mess of cans. "This can't be good at any dilution. You should think about stopping."

"Naw, I'm fine. Come on, have one with me," she elbowed him.

"No," he said firmly.

"Ohhh~" she leaned towards it. "You've never had alcohol before."

"What?! No! Of course I have!"

She held the can up to his face, "Then drink with me."

Vegeta sighed, then grabbed a can. He accidently ripped the entire tab off and only cracked the seal, letting a fizz out.

Bulma laughed as he used his finger to finish the punch. He took a sip.

And immediately spit it out.

"By the gods, woman, how can you drink this? Are our species' taste buds that different?"

"No, it's supposed to be a little bitter."

"A little?!" Vegeta wiped his mouth. Then he spotted the espresso machine.

He got up and began dumping sugar packets into the can.

Bulma laughed. "Oh, you got a sweet tooth. I'll get you a fruit cocktail next time."

After Vegeta got it palatable, he came over bringing the entire wire organizer with him and set it on the coffee table, shoving more empty cans out of the way. He sat back down and began drinking.

Vegeta began reacting before he even finished the second can. He hunched over as he started to flush.

Bulma laughed. "You're such a lightweight!"

Vegeta glared at her. Then popped a new can and drank it without adding the sugar. He started to gag.

Bulma continued to laugh.

Vegeta grabbed his head.

"This doesn't feel right. What the fuck is in this besides ethanol?" he asked. "No species can be THIS immune to it."

Bulma continued to laugh and tease him about being a lightweight.

Vegeta stood, and immediately fell and broke the coffee table.

He rolled over. "Ok, this is not ethanol…"

Bulma continued to laugh, until she noticed something. She smiled and licked her lips.

"Well, seems a third individual is enjoying the beer." She got down on her hands and knees next to him. "They say drunk actions are sober thoughts. I knew you liked me."

Bulma put her hand on his lower abdomen.

Vegeta brushed her hand off him, "There's no one else here but—"

He finally noticed.

"Oh gods, fuck no!" He rolled over to get up. The spin failed and he fell backwards hitting the cubby display shelves as he fell on his butt.

Bulma got up and looked down at him.

Dr. Brief and Panchy knew exactly what emotion was filling his face as Bulma walked over. And as Vegeta scurried backwards, shattering the shelves, the two were pissed and did not bother to hide it.

Bulma reached her hand down, "Come on, let me help get the rest of you up."

Vegeta crawled over the couch. "Ok, now I know there's more than ethanol in that drink." He pulled himself up on the armrest, then reached for the back to get to his feet...

Which he managed to stay up on as he lost his balance again and smacked the wall.

He turned around and found Bulma walking up to him.

"Gods this isn't happening… Woman! I don't know what aphrodisiac is in that drink but get your senses about you."

Vegeta continued to inch his way towards the exit, but Bulma cornered him, putting her hand on the wall blocking his path.

"No. No. No. I don't want to hurt you," Vegeta said, his eyes widening every second. He hunched his shoulders trying to get shorter.

"Little Vegeta is giving a very different answer."

"Do you think I'm proud of that fact? Just ignore it."

Bulma got close to his face.

Vegeta closed his eyes, "Please stop."

Bulma touched his cheek and started to talk.

"Don't touch me!" Vegeta shouted releasing his ki before she got past the first syllable. Bulma flew and flipped over the back of the couch.

Vegeta lifted his hands surprised, then looked at the overturned room as a tilted picture finally lost its battle with gravity with the crack of broken glass. He put his hands on the wall and continued to move along it until he got to the open archway and ran down the hall with his hand over his man parts gritting his teeth. He slammed head first into a wall breaking the drywall at an intersection. Then got up from his knees and rounded the corner.

"Why would he just run into the wall like that? Why did he run like a little sissy? Why did he almost let me get to first base then push me off like that?" Bulma groaned loudly in frustration.

The two glanced at each other again. Panchy took a deep breath and put the smile back on. "Sweetie, I think it's obvious why he did that."

Bulma spun around in the chair. "What?!"

"Sweetie, I really think you need to go rest. If I can see why, then it's obvious you're still in a bad spot from last night. Please let this go for now and go rest."

"Your mother's right, Bulma. Let this go for now and let the beer and hangover completely wear off. You're completely out of it."

Bulma rotated around and looked back at the computer screen.

"NO!" she shouted, slamming her palms, causing everything on it to jump. "I'm not giving up! I will get him! I'm fucking Bulma Brief! The smartest person on the planet! Probably the galaxy!" She looked at the tipped over mug and picked it up. "Ugh… but first more coffee…"

She stood swiftly and the chair rolled back into her parents as she moved to the machine on the other counter.

Dr. Brief suddenly pushed the chair after her causing her to trip and smash her face into the floor.

"Oh sweetie," Panchy ran over to her daughter. "Are you ok?"

Bulma did not answer, just rolled over and gripped her face.

Dr. Brief quickly grabbed the chair and rolled it back.

"Ugh! Fucking chair!" she finally spoke.

"Bulma… the chair's over here," Dr. Brief said.

Bulma looked and was surprised it was back with her father near the desk.

"See. We told you you were still drunk," Panchy said. She stood and offered her hand. "Come on, let me help you up and get some ice on that before there's any swelling."

"I can take care of myself, Mom," Bulma waved her hand away and got to her feet.

She wobbled to the door. "I'll be in the kitchen," she said as she left.

The two peaked out the door and watched until she disappeared around a corner.

"I don't know to be mad at her stupidity, or proud we protected her so well she is that stupid," Dr. Brief said after she was gone.

"Same," she said.

They glanced at each other again, then ran down the hall in the other direction.

They ran down the halls and found where Vegeta smashed his face into the wall, then turned and continued to his room.

Dr. Brief and Panchy took opposing sides of the door. The two looked at each other again and nodded.

"Vegeta! It's Panchy! We're coming in!"

Dr. Brief turned the door knob, pushed it open hard, then the two threw themselves on the ground with their arms over their heads.

After no blasts came and the door stayed open. Dr. Brief crawled over, got his wife, and they looked in the room.

It was smashed to pieces, with a curled-up mass of a blanket in the middle of the floor.

"Well, glad we took poor Bob's memory circuits out," Vegeta heard after he killed whatever had touched him.

He looked out from underneath the blanket and saw the remains of one of the servant droids in a donut around his arm.

"Hey Vegeta," Panchy said softly. "Are you ok? We heard you had a bad night."

Vegeta uncovered his head, and looked disorientated at the destroyed room. His eyes eventually encountered Panchy leaning in at the door with the doctor standing behind her looking over her shoulder. He locked eyes with Panchy. His eyes widened and he grimaced.

"Stay away from me, woman!" he shouted and covered himself up again.

"Panchy," Dr. Brief put his hand on her shoulder and she backed out of the room.

"Vegeta," Dr. Brief said. "We know what happened last night. We came to check on you."

"I didn't hurt her…"

They glanced at each other at the emotion in his voice.

"We know," he said, "We will be deleting all the security footage. Don't worry."

"Why does that woman keep coming after me to hurt her… Make her stop… I don't want to do it…"

"Bulma isn't trying to get you to hurt her," Dr. Brief sighed, "She's flirting with you for sex. But I'll do my best—"

"IT'S THE SAME THING!" Vegeta shouted, pounding the floor with both hands.

Dr. Brief could tell from the divots that he would need to pay a lot to fix the substrate.

Vegeta gripped his hair. "But there is no honor in it… What the hell is wrong with females? How could life even survive evolving like this…"

Dr. Brief and Panchy looked at each other and nodded.

He put his hands in his pocket and looked back in the room. "Vegeta, what is sex to you?"

"What do you mean?" Vegeta said, still hunched over.

"What if I were to say that on Earth, it is tradition to not leave a single bruise on your partner?"

"Of course there is," Vegeta said sarcastically. "It's called doctors and artificial wombs. The donors don't even know the other's names."

They glanced at each other again.

"We don't have those on Earth. Everything is done au naturel."

"What?!" Vegeta shouted. Vegeta's arms went straight through the concrete this time.

Dr. Brief knew there was structural damage when Vegeta pulled his arms out with rebar binding wire tangled around his left one.

"Look, I'm not saying Earth is perfect. Laws are made after the fact after all, but leaving a bruise on your partner is supposed to put you in prison for a very long time, if the judicial system works properly."

"Why are you telling me this? Do you WANT me to mate with your daughter? Or are you trying to invite me to that brothel of yours again?"

"Swinger's club," they both said at the same time.

"Everything is completely consensual and free will," Panchy said. "No one is a prostitute. Which is also illegal here, by the way."

"Oh, I'm sure it is…" Vegeta said skeptically. "Inviting royalty to a sex house on the first day of landing is always free will for the other 'guests'. No pressure on them at all."

"Vegeta," Panchy poked her head in and sighed frustrated. "It was over a year ago, you declined, and we have never brought it up again. You were clearly stressed out, and we already had plans to go and we offered. That was not a personal request for a threesome. You can stop awkwardly turning around whenever you see me in a room. As handsome as you are, I knew you were off limits even then."

Vegeta turned as red as a tomato, ducked his head down and pulled the blanket over his head. He groaned, then shouted, "What the fuck is wrong with the feMALES ON THIS PLANET?!"

"Panchy," Dr. Brief said softly, nodding his head for her to get away from the door.

She backed up.

"Vegeta. How would you like to move to another room? One that's not smashed and doesn't have structural damage to the building."

"I don't care…" he whined.

Dr. Brief sighed frustrated. Then unbuttoned his lab coat and handed it to Panchy.

"Vegeta, look at me a second," he said as he unbuttoned his shirt.

"Why?" He peaked out and saw him pull his undershirt over his head.

Dr. Brief smiled satisfied as the blanket fell from his head as Vegeta gawked.

Vegeta was drunk. Very Drunk. But his brain could still recognize what was still there under the age and mild neglect.

Then his eyes settled on two locations.

"Those aren't surgical marks…" he slurred slightly.

"Nope. Stab wounds." He reached around to his left side. "Got one on my back too."

"You're important enough to be assassinated?"

"Well, yeah. But these all come from long before then. I used to go by my second name Boxer for a reason."

"What does that mean?"

Dr. Brief took a stance. "Boxer has several meanings. One just happens to be a fighting style."

"You're a warrior?" Vegeta sluggishly got to his feet.

"Oh, I haven't had to punch someone in the face for decades, not that it hasn't crossed my mind. But it used to be my bread and butter. Oh, that means how I made money."

Vegeta walked over and Dr. Brief let him touch the scars. He was more worried about Vegeta topping over as he wobbled hunched over.

"You said second name?"

"Humans sometimes give multiple given names listed in order of importance next to the family name. Originally was Trunks Boxer Brief. But I switched it to Britches Trunks Brief and have gone by Britches since I was 16. I was Young Buck after Uncle Buck as a kid before Boxer took over, and his real name was Britches, so it made sense at the time. Got Trunks from Pap Pap, so I wasn't going to give that name up."

Vegeta's eyes widened and leaned up and stared at the doctor.

Dr. Brief looked at him concerned. "Vegeta?"

"...To distance yourself from your warrior past on this weakling planet?" Vegeta said after the long pause.

"No, ruffian past. I used to be the punch first, ask questions never type of kid. Also my father's first name was Boxer, so fuck him."

"The king and male heir must always be named Vegeta while ruling queens and female heirs must be named Sadala. Heirs are always given two names in case they lose their status to a relative. Saying Prince Vegeta is actually redundant in my language."

"Oh, what's your middle name?" Panchy asked.

Vegeta glared up at her. "I. Am. Vegeta." He returned to his scars.

"This was a glancing blow…" Vegeta moved his hand from the doctor's right side to the one near his belly button. "This one was straight on… A hidden blade? Or a betrayal?"

"…Betrayal," he said reluctantly. "But that's a story and a half."

Vegeta stood semi straight, or at least in that general direction.

He looked at Panchy. "So, what's your deep dark secret? Are you a murderer or something?"

"Actually yes. They don't know I survived my execution and pulled myself out of my grave."

Vegeta chuckled. "Very funny."

Panchy just tilted her head and smiled expectantly as Dr. Brief left the doorway, grabbed her by the waist and got next to her in a protective stance.

Vegeta's chuckling slowed down to an awkward groan.

Outside, vehicles and pedestrians went about their day.

"WHAT?!"

Everyone walking or biking stopped and looked at the building. One car hit its brakes causing a three-car rear end while on the other side a car swerved out of the way hitting a parked car setting its alarm off.

Vegeta turned fully to the door and extended his arm pointing, "Story. Now."

The two backed up a step before the change in balance caused Vegeta to face plant halfway out the doorway at her feet.

"Sure, sweetie," she bent down and helped him up. "But let's get you to that new room."

She began dragging Vegeta along by his elbow.

"What's wrong with these?"

"Nope. Now the elevator is this way. We're going over to the executive suites in the business section on the opposite side of the building."

After they disappeared around a corner, Dr. Brief took his phone from his pocket.

"Hey Orjee. Evacuate the southeast side of the building and get the structural engineers with X-ray equipment. Vegeta punched a hole and damaged the rebar this time…. No it's the floor slab, not a support column, thank God…"

While everyone was rushing through the halls, Panchy dragged Vegeta unnoticed into a room.

Vegeta looked around while Panchy shut and locked the door.

"This place is nicer, but very yellow and shiny."

"Rich people have rich tastes."

"So, this is for entertaining nobles? Why are your quarters so plain?"

"We both originally come from working classes. There's still an icky 'what the fuck am I doing" when we visit other elites that poop out their gold leafed and diamond dusted food into their gold and diamond encrusted toilets."

"The ruling elite here consume gold and jewels?"

"Unfortunately…" Panchy sighed.

"Huh…" Vegeta wobbled. "Earth is more normal than I thought… I mean after you explained you have a word for cannibalism and that it's bad, I thought you were all weirdos."

Panchy turned around. "Now let's get you sitting in bed." She guided him over to sit on the silk satin sheets.

Vegeta sat down and Panchy next to him, but kept some distance.

"So. About this murder you committed?"

"Well, whether or not it's considered murder depends on the person and location, but the people who tried to kill me definitely saw it that way."

"Is there a subrace of dumber bipedal relatives I haven't met yet?" he asked, confused.

"No. But first I think you need a little context. You're all about honor, right?"

Vegeta nodded.

"Well, in some, I guess the word tribe would be best without spending hours talking about demographics, females' honor is in her virginity before marriage. And if a girl has sex, whether willfully or not, she and the man can be married against their will as young as 12. It was my mom's 12th birthday when she was forced to marry her first husband, who was 66. He died when she was 14. Her family refused to take her back because she had been dishonoring them since she was 6. So, his family shipped her two states away and became basically a house servant. Then at 16 she got pregnant and a blood test identified which relative it was so she married my 17-year-old father. There were several cousins as possibilities. That was my older sister. Then I was born at 17 and 18. The next two were sons, but were 9 and 11 years away from me.

"Mother was a housewife, never went to school after 12. Father made good money for a rural town. Accountant at the local law firm. It wasn't as much a captive company town as Britches' original home, but we had a small factory that made parts for a bigger factory about an hour drive away. We were basically a full satellite community by the time I was born. Mom stayed behind with his parents while he rode off to college. I apparently have a half sibling somewhere because I stole my father's wallet and checkbook once and found the pressure copies of the payments when I was 13.

"I was a little shit, just like Britches. I actually got in a huge catfight once in school. Full scratching and hair pulling. I bit and ripped her entire right ear off. I got expelled and sent to a cousin in another town so I could continue school in another district. Never saw my siblings again. And my parents only once.

"While I was away my sister got pregnant, off the high school gymnastics teacher. There were always stories about him, but legal age was 16 while the rest of the world was 18. She was 17. He was also part of the family that owned that factory the town depended on, was brother-in-law to the major police family in the area. Some places the local cops are run more as a family business than an actual proper police force. And the good, God-fearing folks of the town turned on my family and anyone associated with them for their daughter having premarital sex, so she had to marry him even though I'm told my parents hated it. But my father was never rehired over it and his new in-laws arranged for him a job cleaning toilets at the local fast food Mexican restaurant while actively getting him black listed in the rest of the state, tristate area really. You don't make enemies with the families that control the car industry, especially in the South.

"Broke, unable to support the family, unable to move," she sighed. "At their complete mercy.

"Baby was born three days after her 18th. She killed him then herself the day the baby was brought home.

I was…"

"Stop," Vegeta said. "You became the sacrificial replacement. Move on to this murder that might not even be one."

"After I was too far along to do anything about it or get help, my parents and I were escorted by the police to a wedding dress store. There are laws about ending a pregnancy, and even those that support the right to do so usually have a moral limit they won't help with after. But even six weeks is too long for the people of the area," she downplayed it, continuing in her normal cheery tone, "so it's not like I was kidnapped and drugged until I was six or seven months along."

"You must have put up quite the fight when you were taken," Vegeta said as Panchy paused to collect herself.

"A police car came to my school and I was pulled aside by the principal, just like any other time a death is reported to a family. I was told my sister died from an unexpected bleed. Which can happen. Pregnancy complications are one of the leading causes of death in women. I highly doubt there was some grand conspiracy to get me with the school. The two officers followed the proper procedures, and after I cried myself out, no one questioned when they said they were there to take me to my family at the hospital. Everything was professional and by the book, so I got right into the cop car without a second thought.

"But back where you want to know. I wouldn't have fit in an off the rack dress if I was showing too strongly. The shop staff was told to find me a dress quickly because we were heading to the courthouse next. And I was told this would be the last time I'd see my parents and they would not be making the same mistake with me as they did my sister after it would have been born. After all, new children join the gymnastics program all the time, so there was no need to get a big ego about being a legitimate wife like my father allowed my mother and sister to develop.

"I like horror movies, this is important. And an old one, that was my favorite when I was little, had a scene where the bad lady freaked out over finding a wire clothes hanger in the house. Child me didn't understand why it was a big deal. And my parents never monitored my internet usage. So I had detailed information no one my age should have known, especially from that region.

"I found a dress with a wire hanger. I took it, folding it over so it wouldn't be seen, then took it into the changing room. Where I was completely alone.

"And I did it… …It… It hurt like hell…

"I was found in the act when I did not come out fast enough. One of the cops pulled the wire out of me then strangled me until I passed out.

"I woke up in the hospital handcuffed to the bed, But I had one free hand and I felt the surgical cut and stitches on my abdomen. Then the police came in, punched me in the face until I stopped struggling, tied me up with duct tape and dragged me out by my hair in front of everyone and into a cop car. I was driven to the dam. It was a style of dam nicknamed drowning machines. People drowned there enough that it wasn't even front page news anymore. I was put into black plastic bags taped up tight so I couldn't even move, and thrown in."

"That sounds like the perfect disposal set up. How did you get out?"

"I was spinning around smashing against the rocks in the bottom. I didn't want to die. But then there was a bright light. Next thing I knew I was on the bank, black bags torn and my legs cut free. I didn't pay attention to it at the time, but there was a large yellow glass bead that washed up next to my head."

"A dragon ball."

"I'm told it's rare. But sometimes Shenron will grant a wish without a full summoning. He must really like my pretty face because he's done it twice."

She paused. "Anyway, I pulled myself up the bank and went through the trees. And I came up on the two-lane road. And a large haul truck with a sleeper cab drove past and slammed on its breaks.

"Older guy, beer gut, really gray beard but his hair was still mostly brown jumps out of the cab and huffs over to me, throws his stained plaid shirt over me and gets me in his cab. He didn't completely believe me at first, especially the police did it part, and I was so far away from the dam he drove past to have just floated all the way down here. And he didn't brake for any cops driving down either. It's not like I was magically teleported in front of him or anything. But the road led into town and he had me hide in the sleepers compartment and stopped at one of the diners.

"He was going to call the police about me when the news came on the TV. A countywide drug bust had happened that day and everyone involved in three of the four raids was shot dead in the gun battles. My name and face were on the TV along with my father, mother, brothers, aunts, uncles, cousins. 18 dead across three towns. There were also mugshots of people taken alive from the fourth. People in bloody scrubs so beaten up you couldn't tell if they were humans or gorillas, Dad's are the uniform of medical staff," she added.

"Removing witnesses."

"Yep… Then the conversations started, and all the gossip was about what I did. He hid in the booth and the family should have just given the baby away instead of letting my mother become a wife. How it was all her fault that two babies were dead because of the poison she brought into their pearl clutching, God-fearing town." She lowered her volume as her sarcasm continued. "Whispering about possibly being 'tainted' in her family tree as an explanation for the women's unlady-like behavior."

She began to talk normally again. "He hung up the pay phone, got his two burgers to go, and he drove off with me."

Panchy sighed. "Dad had just lost his only daughter in a motorcycle accident riding with the boyfriend he warned her against just a few weeks prior. Wife divorced ages ago and never contacted either of them after marrying her affair partner. He was an independent long haul trucker, so after the shit show dealing with the funeral because of family, he packed up his clothes and a few things, got in his truck and was abandoning everything to go the west coast, almost three thousand miles on the other side of the continent. And he politely stated my," she tapped her chest, "assets, and blonde hair and blue eyes, made me look like I could pass for a 22-year-old with some makeup. He said I could travel with him cross-country as his daughter until I figured something out. It wasn't like people on the west coast could tell the difference between one Southern state accent and another anyway. And that's how I became Panchy Garter.

"Dad got a job hauling materials for the skyscraper boom, and I got a job at the coffee shop at the new university student building. I got flirted with a lot. After all, Panchy was prime real estate at 23 years old at that point But I played hard to get while I counted down to my real eighteenth birthday, just to be safe for the boys. The student political clubs met there on different evenings. I met Arthur there. Then he brought Britches there trying to set us up. I had been saying if you're not a genius billionaire I'm not interested to turn boys away. Well, I had never heard of Britches Brief.

"I said no, causing the boys that had gathered to heckle me. I panicked and shouted my dad would not let me date until after I shouted my real birthday, about four months away during summer break. The boys were happy and started to banter on who was going to get me next semester, but Britches just stared at me. When I closed out around midnight, he was waiting outside the building and offered to walk me home. I hadn't had my corrective surgery yet so I was known as the pretty girl with a cane, and he didn't feel right letting me limp to the bus at night. I tried to decline, but he said he wasn't comfortable leaving an underage girl alone.

"I froze. But he smiled and said he wasn't going to report me for using my sister's or whatever cousin's ID I used to get the job. I asked how he knew. He said he was from a coal mining town back East. Most people married during high school, including his two oldest siblings, so he never assumes a pretty girl has to be 18. And screaming a completely arbitrary date clinched it for him because I was wearing a February birthstone necklace.

"It was originally a contract marriage. I marry him a few years, then he gives my family a huge amount after divorcing him over being unfaithful. He and Alex were well known womanizers, clubbers going into a place with a scantily clad girl on each arm then leaving with two completely different women wearing even less clothing than the first set. He paid for the corrective surgeries I needed and I became one of those women to not make the press freak out about him marrying a completely unknown girl. I'll admit the clubbing was fun. Still is. But at some point, it stopped being pretend. We began spending all our clubbing time together by the end of it. And it took Alex pointing out he hadn't had sex in almost two months for him to notice he hadn't been entertaining other girls. After another run in with the same dragon ball cured my infertility, I became persistent on giving him a child."

"I was wondering how Bulma happened… The level of trauma you did to yourself would preclude offspring."

"Oh, I had to have everything removed and the holes in my intestines patched. I went way too deep. But we went through IVF the first time. It's not as medically sterile as what you described, but it's as far as doctors can go currently on Earth.

"We were in Biloxi for a science conference he wouldn't skip in between our wedding and honeymoon when I found the old ball that was in the stream on the ocean beach. That night I was holding it when I mused to myself how I didn't want this arrangement to end and wished I could give him an heir. Then it lit up again. I screamed and Britches ran right in the room and saw it too. When I started bleeding the next day we rushed to the hospital. We were told it was just a normal period and showed us the CT scans to show nothing was wrong. After being assured they were not mixed up with someone else, we left without saying three of those organs shouldn't even be in there. We've kept it ever since, recovering it after every use we can. Just like Goku's family keeps the four star one. It's part of the family. Of course, now we keep it in a box that blocks the radar so others can't find it. Goku keeps his right on the mantle in full view. And they wonder why they keep getting robbed by every villain looking for an easy win with their plans."

She tapped her knees, "And that's also my secret to my eternal youth. On paper I'm only two years younger than my husband. I'm really eight. I'm glad your ship landed when you did, two months before there were protests outside the house. Someone started a rumor that Britches killed his real wife and replaced me with an android and it's gaining traction."

"Android? Like the ones from the future? Is that common here?"

"Nope. But Britches has a wizard-like reputation with electronics and machinery. If anyone could turn pure fantasy into a working product, it's him."

Vegeta leaned forward, stared at the floor for a while, then rubbed his hands together.

Panchy saw he wanted to say something, so just waited patiently as the silence crept on.

"When I was 13… I was pressured into my first attempt. She didn't have much of a choice either, but she was older, very experienced of her own accord, and said sweetly like trying to calm down a toddler that if I controlled my breathing and did exactly what she said, she could make anyone look good. She said to trust her and everything would be fine."

He sighed. "It wasn't." He gave a sad, single chuckle. "Can't exactly fake a face correctly if it's never moved before."

He shifted and turned his head away. "There was a rule in the army. If you could overpower someone, you could do whatever you wanted, even kill. And a lot of powerful people, including in Frieza's elites, second in strength only to him, preferred men. I had to do a lot to recover my reputation so I wouldn't be looked at as weak. I killed a lot of women, then jerked myself off to make it look like I did it when the corpses were checked. And it was physically checked. A lot. Not many believed I could go from one extreme to the other even at the point I rebelled. I mean, they were going to die anyway. Probably the quickest and kindest deaths I gave minus instant incineration.

"What's the smallest unit of currency on this planet?" he suddenly asked.

"A penny. It's one-hundredth of a zeni."

"So it takes 100 pennies to make a zeni?"

"Yes."

"Women were like the rain here when it falls with the electrical generation. After planet selling, slavery was the biggest source of income. Anyone could take a free one in the field of course, but there were state run brothels for the troops to prevent diseases and making sure races didn't genetically match up. They were the main source for the commercial tankers, so sterilization would have just made them worth less money when there were easy and free solutions. Five minutes was a penny. You were not allowed to buy more time with the same unit. Killing the unit was two pennies. Sometimes if the stock was too old, they would have a sale. Kill five for a penny. I saw kill 20 for a penny once. The attached food areas would even cook the unit for consumption as a free perk if you bought alcohol. Alcohol was expensive a fuck. One of the only places it could be bought. A unit might have been a penny, but a cup was 50 full currencies. That's a week's rations. And Frieza usually only paid two or three currencies a planet.

"I was close to my mother. Probably what ruined me. Father tried to correct it when he killed her when I was sitting in her lap as a child covering me in her viscera. But her friend was off-world and never returned. But we kept in contact, even after Frieza came, until she died."

He looked at Panchy. "I've never heard of an act that did not end with the lesser participant tanked. Healing pods suspend an injured person in fluid and heals them. Even someone close to death can be perfectly healthy in an hour or less."

"We have stuff like that in our space fantasy stories," Panchy nodded.

"Most free people, at least as free as Frieza allowed, tried to avoid the most active ones, but there were sluts who initiated. Maybe they thought they would escape without being killed or losing a body part to what you call cannibalism, or maybe they were psychos who loved the pain and experience of almost dying daily."

Vegeta put his face in his hands. "It has never lifted before. I don't want to hurt your daughter. I don't want to hurt anyone. I know my reputation, but I've never done it. I can never do it. Why is my body doing this?"

Panchy watched him silently for a few minutes.

He was breathing roughly, probably trying to calm another panic attack.

"Vegeta," she said eventually. "Despite what views linger in some areas because of all the old farts that haven't died off yet, injuring your partner, and we use the word partner on Earth. Equal Partner. Is punishable, at least by vigilantism if the judicial system doesn't get involved. And even then, they don't last long in prison. There is no tolerance here. None. I'm not saying this because I want you to bang Bulma. What happens between you kids is up to you. But you're in pain. And I think you learning how not to hurt your partner, that it is normal to not hurt your partner, will go a long way. And I think the fact you don't want to hurt a woman means you already see them as an equal partner."

"Of course," Vegeta dropped his hands, "Any mate I theoretically take would have been a queen. Not a slave. I'm not going to dishonor myself by lowering the standard just for a single meaningless encounter."

Panchy leaned in, "Then you're halfway there already." She smiled, "Now, why don't you sleep off the rest of the alcohol. I can still smell it on your breath even at this hour."

"Fine…"

"Ok, I'll go get some Alka-Seltzer and some ginger ale to help nurse that hangover you're going to get."

"Fine…"

"Good," she stood. "I'll be right back."

Panchy left the room, and Vegeta kicked his feet over and laid on the bed.

He stared at the intricate artwork on the ceiling.

"Finding pleasure without inflicting pain on an equal…" Vegeta muttered.

…

…

"Is that what they were doing?"

Nine hours later…

Dr. Brief was at his office desk working, then he stretched with his arms over his head. "Finally, 6. Glad it's meatloaf night. I'm hungry."

The door suddenly burst open, with the top hinge breaking leaving the door hanging crooked.

"Doctor!"

Dr. Brief jumped then put his hand on his chest. "God damn it, boy I'm 63. Don't scare me like that!"

Vegeta stomped over, "You will erase EVERYTHING that happened yesterday and today! I want NO EVIDENCE whatsoever!"

"Don't worry. Already done. Both last night and this morning."

"Did your wife tell you anything from our conversation?" he demanded.

"Nope. She's good at secrets. Only way I'll find out is if you tell me yourself."

Vegeta took a breath and visibly relaxed. He looked around the room.

"You entertain nobles here? This is not your native style."

"Unfortunately," he nodded. "Personally, I'd rather keep my rewards in a drawer than all the shelves. Feels like bragging."

Vegeta walked over to one of the clear doored shelves. "This one is mostly gold."

"Yep. All 9 Nobel prizes, and a lot of other stuff. Nobel's are the highest honor you can get. They are for accomplishments that are world shaking. The kind of thing historians will use as a marker for before and after. Mine are all for chemistry and physics." He got up and walked over, "I do have a 10th, but I keep that one in the bedroom."

"What makes it special?"

"It's a Nobel Peace Prize. It's when someone does something that massively improves the lives of the people of Earth. Mine's a lifetime achievement award instead of one massive event."

"Is that your favorite collectible?"

"No. I keep that by my normal desk. Want to see? It has to do with my scars. You actually remember that part? You were even worse off than Bulma this morning."

"… Something about a betrayal?" Vegeta said uncertainly.

"You asked that after examining it. Surprised you recognized it was straight on compared to the other two, but then it's you."

He then pushed one of the carvings on the display case, and the thing suddenly split in half and moved to either side.

"Hidden elevator up to my real office."

Vegeta stepped out into the tornado of a room, covered in papers and robot parts.

"Over here," Dr. Brief said as he snaked through a walking path left between all the piles on the floor.

He picked up a picture frame off the wall behind the desk and headed back.

"Here," he handed it to him.

There was a partially burned piece of paper and a page of text and a photo in the same material and placement style as the information pamphlets he read in his stuffed chair every morning.

Vegeta looked up. "I can't read your planet's script."

"Title says 'Thomas Creek first community unincorporated by state government'." That means it no longer legally exists. No postal codes, no longer marked on maps, nothing."

Vegeta had a sudden look of confusion. "You caused this?"

"Yep," he smiled. "And not just that village. I sent the entire state into a tailspin. I mean the area was already the definition of poverty and destitution, but somehow it actually got worse."

"And the burnt paper?"

"My generosity thrown back in my face." Dr. Brief took it and went back to hang it up.

"My family was from Thomas Creek. Grew up there. Parents married at 16, an army of kids to feed, all the normal things you expect from an old stock Irish mining town. I'm the youngest and only boy. Father was a union welder at the mine. Huge accident led to the last big worker's strike. Father decided to pull up roots and used his union connections to get him and the men who married his oldest daughters' jobs at one of the many factories in Pepper City. It's an hour south of here. This entire region was wiped out by a natural disaster, and even hundreds of years later this area is still the fastest growing place in the sector. Really shows what happened here."

"What happened?"

"The largest earthquake and tsunami in history," he pointed at a wall. "Off the coast here is the Cascadia Fault. It's the boundary between two big hunks of the planet that move against each other. And since it's underwater, when it moves, it causes waves the size of mountains." He lowered his arm, "It happened a year after the Unification War officially ended. Last earthquake and wave of any size from it was in 1700 on the old calendar system, and was nowhere as big. Water actually made it over some of the hills and raced inland. We have a scale from zero to ten for earthquakes. It was a 9.9. If you're interested, there's a monument where the wave actually impacted itself when what went over the hills smashed into what went through the harbor at the Olympia Memorial. But anyway, we lived in the poor part of town next to the factory and when I started 9th grade, some thugs decided to teach the new nerdy white country boy how things were done in the big city."

Dr. Brief smirked. "Five minutes later, there were 16 kids on the ground around me and I had two knives sticking out of me. Adrenaline is one hell of a drug." His face soured, "Wish I could say that was the last time I was messed with. But that was just the beginning." He sighed. "There are some huge international drug smuggling organizations, and when the police get a snitch, they protect them with their life, usually committing state sanctioned crimes in the process. And one of the kids that I dislocated their jaws… was a snitch.

"So, out of everyone, the police came after me, and then there was the gang itself. Union lawyers kept the cops busy, but the gang not so much. I won't say what was done to the younger of my sisters, but you probably have the imagination for it after talking with my wife. Father got a new job in West City proper. The area was finally booming enough that the skyscrapers were being rebuilt. We got to the rental with the U-haul and Father unlocked the door, but it was already open.

"The place was smashed and tagged to pieces. 'We'll be back' and 'We'll always find you' were written in several rooms. While going through the mess, Father called my name and tapped my shoulder. I turned around, and he stabbed me, and not with a little ceramic pop knife you can sneak through metal detectors either. A real one. Then he punched me in the face, putting me down and smashed my leg with his steel toes until it bent the wrong way. Then the men dragged the women out. Three days later, someone broke in. I thought they were there to put me out of my misery, but it was Uncle Buck and another man in a suit.

"Not a blood uncle, he was one of the heads of the local union back in town. He taught me how to fight as a kid after my first few brawls in kindergarten and said I was destined for the picket lines. Got my ass to the hospital. Couldn't turn my father in, so it all got blamed on the gangs. Found out the guy in the suit was actually the union breaker the mine had flown in to destroy the strike. But he was originally from West City, and he had a private jet.

"Father called Uncle Buck on day two after he got out of the mountains and into Cali. To save my life Uncle Buck basically waved my MENSA certification and the fact I was taking college courses as a preteen under a union scholarship to put chum in the water. I essentially got traded for concessions in strike negotiations. Lots of forged documents later, I was attending a private boarding school with the breaker's son, Alex." He waved dismissively at what looked to Vegeta as a random wall. "It's north of here across the old border. Lots of pretty pines and stuck-up a-holes in that part of the harbor.

"Anywho…I was brought in on a sports scholarship because being a MENSA was basically a prereq to get in. I was literally reading a pamphlet on the rules of boxing right up until class started. Almost screwed myself needing help with putting the gloves on for the first time."

He took a deep breath and puffed his cheeks as he blew it out slowly. "I was told not to stick out. So, I decided to let myself get beat up, but I needed it to be realistic. I got to fight the coach first thing. Weaved, dodged, guarded. Burning out the timer. I let him get me in a corner. But I decided if I needed to make this realistic, I needed to throw a punch. After all this guy was clearly going easy on me. I… knocked him cold… He did not wake up after salts. They called an ambulance. Found out I, a 16-year-old kid, knocked out an Olympic gold medalist so hard he didn't wake up until the next evening. The Olympic Games are like the Nobel of sports. So much for the newly coined Britches Brief keeping a low profile. I was instantly swamped with college recruiters and sports teams, who noticed inconsistencies in my backstory. Not enough to out me," he began to chuckle, "Or I'd be dead. But anyway, I was quietly let go from the private school after my sophomore year, everyone was too embarrassed to let this go public they let trash in. Alex was let go too because of his father's involvement.

"But West City University is a public college and they did not withdraw their sports scholarship and let me start taking courses while finishing up my last two years of high school at the public school. Because of that I graduated at 20 and started my Master's. But they did downgrade my full ride scholarship, so up until Capsule Corp took off, I fought for money to help pay for my Bachelors and Masters. And you know… rent, food, clothing. I got completely cut off by the mine owners. But finally got some good luck with my first Nobel in physics at 23. Founded Capsule Corp with Alex's help at 24. Met Panchy at 25. Married Panchy at 29..

"Wrote that check at 30. It's a way to transfer money without physical currency between accounts. Capsule Corp was flourishing and I was already a billionaire and climbing higher. Despite everything, family loyalty is driven into your noggin from the day you're born. I sent that check for half of what I had to my father." He gestured at the wall before shoving his hands in his pocket. "He sent it back half burnt."

"This planet is a money-driven ruling strata, right?"

"That's one polite way to put it," he answered.

"This billionaire made you a ruling elite at that point?"

"I was an elite already with half of what I tried to give away."

"So your birth family, who are lower class, basically burnt an invitation to join the ruling class of this planet out of spite?"

"Yep. Tried again by sending the check to my oldest sibling instead of my parents, but that was sent back as a bag of ashes with a letter. One of my younger sisters had killed herself immediately after they moved back and the other was in a mental institution after illegal drug use caused permanent psychosis. I was also told Uncle Buck was dead with the quote 'you know how things are when a man is found on the trails'."

"He was murdered and put on display along a travel path."

"Yep…"

Dr. Brief took a long pause.

"Then at 32…"

He took another calming breath, but Vegeta saw anger still filled his eyes.

"The mine closed. It was basically the only employer for dozens of communities. I wanted to give back. Even if my family didn't want anything to do with me, there were thousands of others I grew up with hurting. I tried to open my first factory on the east side of the Mississippi. Alex actually turned down his mother's offer to have his senior year at another private school in her city and stuck with me through thick and thin. If he hadn't already turned 18 when we were kicked out… I'd probably be dead. Children under 18 need a guardian. And those who don't have one get put under government care. My name change wasn't legal at that point. So going into city foster care under my real name with the police and gang looking for me… well…"

He looked thoughtful. "He was nice for a spoiled rich SoB. He loved old electronics, like before unification crap, and was surprised I knew what an N.E.S. was. Nerds for life. I actually invented my first model miniature satellite uplink to play ripped games with Panchy's dad when he was on the road." He sighed. "I was always Luigi, or worse when it was all three of us. But you don't care about that…

"Well… He went personally because I was in Europe for my third Nobel ceremony. He was found dead at the base of a tree with a hanging rope around his neck tossed over a branch that had no hope of holding his weight and no marks that the rope was ever tied off. Officially it was ruled suicide, but the tourists who found his body were able to upload the pictures and video they took before the police destroyed their devises. My pocket-sized satellite links for the win.

"Alex had been horribly beaten but his neck was pristine, and the police instantly closing the case and ruling it suicide by hanging made the whole world suspicious. I stopped all deliveries to distributors in the state, and any businesses near the border who could sell to people driving out of the state. I was even able to block internet sales.

"The mine owners were right about one thing. Being one of the richest sons of a bitches on the planet makes you a god. And being a benevolent one does not mean I can't destroy with righteous fire when I want to."

Dr. Brief turned around, "The state population has halved since I boycotted the state. There's more populated regions in the Sahara Desert now. Opening factories just far enough away it could not be traveled to without moving out has helped. And I got good press for reopening the Rust Belt for my efforts. I also created scholarships, but only to out-of-state colleges and trade schools. Suck every last drop of blood from there. But the place was already collapsing for years. Only people left are the elderly and those so poor they can't even afford to walk out on their bare feet."

"Have you also punished Panchy's tribe?"

"Unfortunately, anything direct would call attention to her. And I can't stop other companies from doing things. There's a new automotive factory that was opened up outside of town a few years ago. The Korean company that operates in the area launched a new model trying to compete with mine. Everyone is married to their own cousins over there; the big families are really impossible to deal with. They all operate in lockstep, from electronics to shipping boat construction to toilet paper. There's an old song about how a working man can't go to heaven because his soul is owned by the company. Over there they own the entire province. And they never let you forget it." He turned around, "But I doubt you want to hear about business talk. You got my story about my stab wounds."

"Doctor, would you assist me in giving Panchy my dynastic emblem?"

"Oh, why?"

"Earth is going to enter the galactic space, for Frieza's death if nothing else. When Earth falls, not if, when, you and Bulma are highly valuable. Panchy is not. My insignia will strike terror in the soldiers sent to capture the two of you so she will not be eliminated in an act to force compliance."

Dr. Brief smiled, "I'm glad you two are getting along. You can come to us for anything, Vegeta. Especially Bulma."

"Panchy is a warrior… if not a soldier. I find myself wishing my mother had been as lucky with her arranged marriage." He glanced away, "My father killed her when she was no longer of use after two offspring."

"Well, I wouldn't call it arranged. Not like Goku and Chichi. I was just protecting the people I cared about in the best way I knew how, with my money. Romantic love and sex can come later, even if it comes completely unexpected. If you fall in love with what the other hates about themselves, everything else becomes easy."

"Neither of you should be ashamed of your pasts. But that explains how Kakarot ended up with a female…"

"Oh, Goku did not even know he was the groom until a few days before," Dr. Brief laughed. "Man spent a decade receiving gifts, being made to spend time with her, and constantly hearing the words marriage and wedding, and he just thought they were the types of food they kept having for dinner when he was over."

"Seriously?!"

That night, the two were in bed.

"So, how bad is it without telling me anything?"

"Really bad… Glad I like horror movies…"

"Are you to be, ok? I wasn't expecting you to say anything."

"I could tell your sisters weren't going to be enough. Just woman's intuition."

Dr. Brief paused. "You like the boy, huh?"

"He reminds me of someone else I used to know. A workaholic who buried himself in paper and metal parts so he didn't have to think."

He chuckled, "You forgot sex addict." He sighed, "How are we going to keep Bulma away from him?"

"She's fixated on him now, so reverse psychology isn't going to work. Yamcha's pissed to the point this might finally be permanent, so redirecting won't work. And setting up a third alternative would just burn that bridge with him." She looked at him. "Let's start on the alcohol. Someone should not be drunk almost 12 hours after only three beers. That sounds like a liver issue."

"Or a gut yeast infection. Good idea. Keep him sober."

"So, how's the acquisition going?" she changed the subject.

"Eh, regulators don't want to give it to me because I already own Ford. Seems Chevy will probably go to Alcibiades."

"How is he doing?"

"Not sure, he's been avoiding me at parties recently. It's to the point the other billionaires have noticed. They asked if Bulma turned down his son and now things are awkward between us. Told them no and shrugged.

"Dr. Gero declined to show up at the conference again," he continued. "He's having another assistant present this year."

"That's six years now," Panchy said. "He used to love throwing his prosthetics and artificial organs in your face."

"I know… but he is older than me. Man's probably going to be found dead in a lab in the next few years if his health is as bad as the rumors say. Just wish he'd send better assistants. It's almost as if they have never met him or even worked on what they are presenting."

Suddenly Panchy burst out crying. She put her bent back fist on her forehead and bit her lip trying to calm down.

Dr. Brief quickly rolled over and hugged her as she began to shiver uncontrollably.