Chapter 29: Pride Cometh
Everyone found themselves standing in the throne room.
They looked around.
"Everyone can move around freely," Luna said. "Feel free to walk around. This goes for any elder ponies. You will have full movement and no pain. This is a quick check as everyone's mind is a little different. Please tell me if you are having any issues. Once that is done, we will do one last exercise, then we will merge the dreamplanes."
Everyone moved around and found their groups. Lady Pumpernickel caught many individuals' attention as she jumped around and spun in circles giggling.
The lighthearted display caused many to quietly chuckle. Many of the younger nobles went over and introduced themselves, to the annoyance of the older ones.
Poppycock sent Blarney over to them.
"You all must be very brave to come talk to this mare," Blarney said. "Lady Pumpernickel has always had quite the reputation. In fact, three of her four children are illegitimate with a plethora of possible fathers. And now I've heard there was a fifth you had, even before you were sold by your parents to pay their debts to your late husband of three months. Then you lost nearly the entirety of his estate to a lawsuit by his ex-wife and six daughters."
"You are also speaking about one of my favorite conversation partners."
Blarney turned around and saw Princess Celestia and Prince Blueblood.
"And your family has been courting them recently, as well. It seems the fact that I sponsored them since they were foals and gave them important positions in the government is more important than a lack of father on their paperwork."
"And you should be one to talk, Blarney," Prince Blueblood called him without a title. "You're pulling rank on Lady Sea Swirl's rightful fiancé, and the only reason the child was born out of wedlock and him not being listed on the birth certificate is you. Your pride and vanity has dishonored two innocent families and tarnished the royal family and the bearers who introduced the two in the first place."
Everyone around them gasped.
Blarney smiled. "Those are heavy accusations. What proof do you have that can outweigh the rank my family's words carry? Were you at the conception? If I say something is true, then it is. Simple as that."
"Don't act like you can raise the sun and moon," Blueblood snapped back.
"Unicorns once did that all on our own long before the princesses were born. A spell is just a spell."
"Did you just insult Princess Celestia to her face?" Lady Pumpernickel moved in front of him. "I see the Gleanings and the Folderols have become even dumber over the years. But I suppose you can only marry your own cousins so often before it shows."
Blarney smiled, "Such things only matter for non magical beasts. Magic and magic alone controls the wellbeing of ponies."
"Well, I guess that means you have nothing to worry about since both your parents were diagnosed with cancer at the same time. Shockingly young, too. They didn't even reach ninety."
Blarney did not react. He smiled and turned to the group. "I suggest you think quickly of the reputations of your houses going forward. For I have warned you of your accidental faux pas and am now leaving."
He walked away.
All the young nobles quickly followed him.
"Hmph. One would think having the backing of the royal family would mean something," Lady Pumpernickel said. She looked at Celestia, "What have you been doing all these years to get that response."
"Being defeated so easily by Queen Crystalis definitely has not helped matters," Celestia said. Then she smiled. "But don't worry. Everypony will remember the true power gap between us sooner than later."
"Well, I have three ducal candidates ready to go."
"Marchioness…" Robin Song whined.
Celestia put her hoof to her mouth and giggled. "I understand if you prefer the commoner life, Robin. I can't force you to do anything." She turned serious. "But even a simple baronet that cannot be passed on would provide legal protections, now that it's known you're not just a lover's pampered child. The margrave speaking up in front of Duke Poppycock now makes you a target by not just Equestrian nobles, but the griffon nations. I'll be writing the paperwork once this mess is over. You'll all be nobles before we finally get night started."
"Ok, if you have to," Robin said.
"Don't worry," Blueblood said. "I'm not going to let anything happen. I already called my contacts before Aunt Luna cast the spell."
Celestia nodded. "I fully approve of what he did. I agree you have nothing to worry about."
Lady Pumpernickel nodded. "But I still expect that apology letter, young stallion."
"Of course."
"Alright, every being!" Luna called out. "Any issues? Please speak up so we can move on to the next step."
No one spoke up.
"Excellent." Luna lit her horn.
An apple appeared in front of everyone. Then it dropped to the floor.
"This is to make sure you can interact with the world. Please try to pick it up. Both with hooves and with magic for those who have it. Also feel free to take a bite. It is edible like all dream foods."
The unicorns found they could cast levitation spells, and most of the ambassadors also ate the apple.
"Alright, anyone who has not eaten your apple, please bring it up front and put it in a pile on the right. Anyone with a core left over, please put it in a pile on the left."
Over 100 uneaten apples ended up in a pile at her feet.
"Anyone interested in seconds before I remove these?"
Pixiu raised his paw.
"Then come up."
Pixiu came up with Feiyu through the center of the room as ponies backed out of the way of his huge girth. Pixiu grabbed a large number of apples. Feiyu shaped an appendage and lifted an apple, tossed one in the air, and made it disappear into his clouds. Next, he removed a core from within him and placed it on top of the pile. Then they returned to the back through the same open path, with Pixiu having a loud one-sided conversation as Feiyu exaggeratingly twisted around in response.
"That should finish off any doubts about Feiyu," both she and Celestia thought at the same time.
They returned to the back of the room to the waiting Lord Nanda, and the Golden Herd and Garuda ambassadors.
Once hidden in the group, Feiyu removed the whole apple and handed it to Pixiu.
"Why did you do that?" Lord Nanda asked.
"Let's not get into all the issues we've been having with pegasi the past few years. After Princess Twilight's debacle, the stallion of the hour wanted to nip this in the butt."
"You've already met him?" a Garuda asked, surprised.
Feiyu made a hand-like shape and tapped a finger to his front.
The Garuda nodded, understanding the shush. "Yes, Master Feiyu," he whispered.
"Is everyone ready to merge the rooms?" Luna asked.
"What does that entail?" a noble asked.
"Just me making a portal, talking to Princess Cadence, then removing the walls. This room will simply get bigger. Any other questions?"
She looked around.
"No? Alright." Luna lit her horn and a door replaced one of the stained glass windows. She cracked it open. "Cadence? All well over here? … Good."
She entered the door. Nothing happened for a while. As ponies began to glance at each other, the wall and door disappeared.
"If everypony could walk over and join the others, we can tidy this up," Luna said walking back.
The twenty odd ambassadors walked over, along with Princesses Cadence and Twilight, and also…
"How did Earl Jetset and Lady Upperscrust get in before the rest of us?" Duke Poppycock demanded.
"My wife was not feeling well, so Princess Luna guided us to a couch then offered to let us in with the ambassadors in preparation for the main dreamwalk."
"Yes, and they have proven lovely conversation partners," Princess Cadence said. She looked at the two, "It was a pleasure talking to the two of you again. I do hope your bug resolves quickly."
"Thank you, Princess Cadence," Uppercrust bowed.
"Princess Twilight, let's head to the dais."
"Yes."
The two joined Celestia, and Luna entered one of the back rooms in the spare throne room.
Poppycock got into Jetset's face. "You better tell me everything that was said over there," he hissed softly, "and quickly."
Jetset swallowed, "Yes, duke."
Soon after the far wall began to move and the rooms combined to about a size and a quarter, providing lots of room for the hundreds of guests. The new guests mingled and found their places as Luna came back out.
"Everyone is ready," Luna said softly as she joined the other princesses on the dais.
Everyone nodded. Luna took her place next to her sister. Cadence and Twilight stood to Celestia's other side.
"If every being is ready," Celestia said loudly. "We are ready to begin."
The room quieted.
"Before we bring Prince Vegeta out here to speak to you, we would like to give some basic information we have learned about him and the circumstances of him coming to our kingdom. Please let me finish before anyone speaks."
Celestia looked around the room before continuing.
"Over a thousand years ago in one of his earliest successes, Starswirl the Bearded created a portal to a completely different planet under a completely different sun and moon, with animals and beings unlike anything that exists here. But while he was exploring, he discovered a terrible truth." She paused. "This world had no magic, and was actively sucking it from his body. He barely made it back to the portal. After that, he began to use it as a prison and banished many thousands of criminals into it over his years of travel. But then the portal closed, and to my sisters and my knowledge, never functioned again during his life.
"The flood of strange creatures with fantastical powers, back in the age where the sentients were only just discovering the use of metal, left a giant impression on the young civilization. The races of the banished criminals became mythologized and even divine. A thousand years passed for both our worlds, and this planet, called Earth, was contacted by other planets from across space, sometimes in peace, other times in war.
"What began as an alliance of convenience between former enemies ended with Prince Vegeta giving up his pursuit of the throne and running off with an Earth female he first met on the battlefield and ultimately joining her house. That was thirty years ago. They have two children.
"Three hundred years before his arrival, another race gifted the beings of Earth a magical artifact that could survive the sucking effect, even though it had extremely long recharging times between uses. That artifact is in the possession of his wife's influential family… Yes, I can see looks of realization on several faces, let me finish. Now his youngest child's, barely over the age of a toddler foal, favorite story is of magical ponies based off of the old legends that takes place in a town called Ponyville. So, when he gave her the artifact as a holiday gift to have her wish granted, he was not worried when she blurted out what she wanted. Because ponies and Ponyville are not real.
"That assumption earned him a trip to the Everfree Forest where he almost died in a new body he had no idea how to control. His inability, and our assumptions upon first encounter, has led to a lot of misunderstandings and injury. We are here to proclaim Prince Vegeta is not dangerous, nor is his daughter. Teleportation exists on Earth, and is done by tracing an individual's unique signature of life instead of magic. While his body change may delay his tracking, he is confident he will be found in the coming days. Once that happens, he knows his wife would be eager to facilitate the opening of a relationship between our worlds again. And that is where we stand. Prince Vegeta is still recovering from his injuries while his daughter is being spoiled in the palace to take her mind off of recent events. Now, any quick questions before we bring him out and you can question him directly?"
"Is he really an alien?" the Trottingham ambassador shouted. "Is this really a first contact like the space fiction?"
"Technically it's re-establishing contact, but yes, that is the situation. Another reason to call this meeting. This is too monumental for one nation alone."
Irmhild raised his claw, "So you are saying out there in the universe, there are magical artifacts powerful enough to create alicorns out of completely thin air, and so simple to use a toddler can do it?"
"Yes," Celestia said.
"Alicorns are supposed to be nigh unbeatable creations, the most powerful beings in the world," he continued.
"Maybe on Equus, but now our world has grown much bigger. In ways few have accurately imagined. How we measure up in the wider universe is still unknown. But Prince Vegeta has offered friendship, and if needed, the protection of his wife's family as we navigate this going forward."
Lord Fire Whirl raised his hoof. "Has the daughter also been turned into a dark mage?"
"Not noticeably," Luna answered, "But her dreams are quite powerful. This may just be how the minds of Saiyans and their hybrids work, and their presence on this planet is causing new phenomena in the aether I'm sure the magic council will be interested in in the days to come."
"You're referring to the dark mage's ability to cause physical harm in the real world to sleeping ponies?"
"Prince Vegeta has also discovered he can heal ponies the same way. He healed my burns when he accidentally injured me on our first meeting. He did some minor healing on himself but did not want to press his luck on an unfamiliar body. Then there was our last-ditch effort to save the life of Lady Pinkie Pie, which was successful, but at catastrophic injury to himself that he almost never woke up from. We need to study this thoroughly going forward, instead of gambling on ad hoc attempts fueled by desperation."
"You seem overly attached, just like the witness said in the papers," one of the nobles that came with Poppycock said.
"Did you forget I was also there?" Celestia said smiling. "Am I also sleeping with Prince Vegeta like the rumors about my sister that have been flying around?"
All the nobles had shocked and stunned looks on their faces.
"This is a message from all four of us as your RULERS. This. Stops. Now. Prince Vegeta's an aging male with only a decade or two left for his race's average lifespan, has been married half his life, and has a grown son and an oopsie baby in their old age."
Cadence chimed in next. "You're accusing Princess Luna of adultery and homewrecking with a foreign power. Even if his title is residual by his own admission, his wife's house is NOT. We are not just admonishing you now. We are saying this in front of all the AMBASSADORS. There is no romance. It has been a difficult path of trust for the past two days. TWO DAYS. Technically THREE now. I am EMBARRASSED for my former home."
Twilight went to speak, but Irmhild cut her off. "You said he has been married half his life, but he met his wife about 30 years ago. So, he is in his 60s and his race's average age of death is between 70 and 80?"
"Yes," Celestia said. "Both Saiyans and Earthlings live about the same lifespan as many species here on Equus. But that is the average; it is possible for one to live to a hundred, but he is also aware of his own health and doubts he will reach that mark."
Celestia looked at Twilight.
She went to speak, but this time Blarney was the one to interrupt. "Princesses, with all due respect, since there is nothing else of importance to say, let's meet this stallion so we can all go home and rest. You have delayed the night long enough."
Twilight's ears fell when most of the nobles instantly agreed.
"I'll get him then," Twilight suddenly said before the other three could respond.
She walked to the side room door on the same level as the dais. "Vegeta, you can come out now."
Everyone's eyes went wide when Vegeta walked out.
"What the buck it that?!" a pony shouted.
"A real life buddha," Lord Nanda said quietly in awe. "Then that story was about your sacred mirror."
He was expecting that reaction, but it did not stop him from nervously playing with the tie of his purple suit. He picked up his metal folding chair and continued to the center of the dais. He placed his chair in front of Celestia and Luna and stood in front.
Vegeta put his arm over his chest and bowed, "Nobles of Equestria. Esteemed Ambassadors. It is a pleasure to finally meet everyone. I am Prince Vegeta of the Saiyans, currently of House Brief. While I understand the formality of your customs dictates the use of my royal title, I usually go without it with the step down in rank in my wife's family due to the marriage. Simply calling me Vegeta is fine and I will take no offense."
"Then what title do you prefer instead of your royal title? Is your wife's house ducal? Earldom?" Poppycock asked.
"Earth is a capitalist democracy. While titles still exist as either legacies or as an elected position's name, power is determined by wealth. My wife's family is the wealthiest on the planet by more than the next twenty combined. But they carry no legacy."
"You are a peasant?"
"As is nearly a hundred percent of Earth's population. I understand the concept would be off putting for such a strict monarchist society, but you're just going to have to deal with it just like I did. Many people, even if you are introduced with your title, will never use it because it carries no weight or importance unless it is your job. The Princesses have weight because it is their job as direct rulers. Prince Blueblood for example does not and will most likely be dropped in standard conversation."
"And your own kind?"
"We were a militarized meritocracy, but there were prominent families that dominated the government. The royal family was an example. While the king was technically elected, it's usually a free for all between the children, or sometimes cousins of merit if the children were in a politically weak position. My great-grandfather was married into a side branch and was a prominent war hero, but he would have never been considered without that marriage. My father was the youngest and by a mistress, but was also selected for heroism."
"Which one of your relatives will we be dealing with once we are formally introduced to your birth kind?"
"My kind were conquered and later genocided when I was a child. A fellow Saiyan named Kakarot and myself are the last. So, there is no one to be introduced to."
Vegeta could tell that went over almost everyone's heads.
"Then those that conquered you?" Poppycock continued.
Vegeta smiled. "Also dead. Last I heard, thirty years ago the old Frieza empire was broken into warring factions between remaining generals while other neighboring empires were gobbling up planets around the edges and pushing deeper into the chaos."
"Is Earth also controlled by a larger empire?"
"I'm sure some dumbasses sat at a conference table once and divided the galaxy between themselves at some point, but everyone that has tried to enforce any claim on Earth has ended up dead. So no, Earth has always been independent and will stay so for the foreseeable future."
"What's a galaxy?" a noble asked confused.
"A galaxy is a massive group of stars that circle a central point, usually a supermassive black hole."
"What's a black hole?"
"It's a type of dead star."
There was a massive gasp from everyone in the room.
"Stars cannot die. The universe is eternal and unchanging!" Lord Fire Whirl stomped his foot.
Vegeta pinched his nose. "Why am I not surprised you're this far behind…"
"Behind? Behind?! Are you calling us primitive?!"
"Did anyone here believe in life on other planets without wishful thinking? Evidence based extrapolation based on the fundamental origins of life on this planet. And no religious so and so god did it."
"Are you referring to the origin of magic?" Lord Fire Whirl asked.
"Unless you're literally made of magic and would die if it was sucked from your body then no, if you can survive without it, then it is not the fundamental origin of life."
"Are you referring to cells?"
Vegeta pointed back like a teacher. "It's along those lines, yes, and you are?
"Prince Eric of the United Kingdoms of Norway and Jutland."
"Good, now. Do you know what part of the cell makes it alive? What controls everything?"
"That X shaped stuff in the nucleus?"
"Yes, and what is that made of?"
"I don't know."
"Earth calls it Deoxyribonucleic acid. DNA for short. There is also a smaller version called RNA, Ribonucleic acid. These chemicals are the written language of life. This chemical has evolved separately on every planet that has life. Since Prince Eric mentioned its X-like shape, it is the same here."
"You're saying an acid is the basis of life? Acids dissolve and burn," Lord Fire Whirl said.
"An acid is just a molecule with an extra hydrogen atom. Reactivity is completely independent."
"Did you just say atom? Atomics was disproven thousands of years ago!" Lord Fire Whirl said. "The only reason I even know about it is because it's a footnote in my philosopher's degree."
"You mean the duel between…" he looked back at Celestia, "What was it? Borealis and leprechaunus or something?"
"Leucippus," Luna smiled while Celestia and Cadence struggled to keep a straight face.
"Who and what now?" Twilight asked.
"Later, Twilight," Cadence said firmly.
Twilight flattened her ears.
"Anyway…" Vegeta turned back around. "Just because one bastard killed another bastard doesn't mean the dead guy wasn't right. That may work for politics and history, but not science. Like I told the princesses and Discord, magic manipulates the world. Not controls it."
"Alright then, Prince Vegeta. Give every pony here a good laugh and show us how far down the rabbit hole the rest of your galaxy has gone."
Irmhild interrupted. "I see no reason to 'go down the rabbit hole' as you kindly put it. This is a waste of time."
"Does Equestria really not follow atomics?" Prince Eric said looking around confused. "It was a major part of my education and Gotaland hosts a major awards conference for discoveries."
"Then griffons are fools as always," Lord Fire Whirl said.
"Lord Fire Whirl!" Celestia and Luna shouted in unison, stamping their hooves. They looked at each other. Celestia nodded to Luna. "That was horribly out of order," Luna continued, "and in front of several griffon nations! Apologize this instant!"
"And what are you going to do about it?" Duke Poppycock hijacked the conversation. "Remove him and insult the greatest mages in ponykind? That will damage Equestria's standing more than insulting some abandoned and forgotten ideas back in ancient times."
"There hasn't been a non-Equestrian citizen on the council in 600 years," a Zebra said. "How can a Council represent all of Equus's magic when no other race can bring their experience and expertise to the world? When was the last time anyone on your council brewed a zebra potion or any potion not invented by ponies? The griffons pay more attention to our brews than you have in generations."
There was a loud hoof stomping from the other non-pony ambassadors.
"So, am I talking about this or not?" Vegeta asked.
"I say we allow it," Luna said looking at Celestia.
"Agreed," she nodded.
Irmhild looked frustrated. He glared at Margrave Olov.
He nodded and turned to Prince Eric, "Eric, I understand your curiosity, but now is not the time. You just sent this meeting into a wild tangent."
"But the princesses said the hours we spend in here will only be a few minutes in real life. But how can Equestria not know about atomics? What harm is there to tell them about it?"
"You mean like what happened just now? An insult like that can start a war. There are better times and places for this."
"Oh… ok then…"
"Luna, can I have a board to teach the class?" Vegeta rolled his eyes.
Luna created a chalkboard.
"Ok… more specific. Can I have a whiteboard and markers?"
She glanced at her sister.
Celestia shook her head slightly.
"No one here knows what a whiteboard is… great… Can I make one myself?"
"You want to cast your dark magic?!" a pony yelled.
"No, it's a mental projection!" Vegeta said frustrated. "You didn't levitate the pony next to you and bite them during the apple exercise, did you? You THINK what you are doing is happening and it happens in the dream world."
"The princesses said you can't control magic. How can you manipulate the dreamplane without experiencing magic beforehand?"
"It's called 'lucid dreaming'." Then Vegeta suddenly smiled. He clapped his hands together. "Alright, who wants a quick lesson?"
"Oh, yes, show us this wonderful, nonexistent power somehow without using it," Lord Fire Whirl said.
"Ok, first lesson in making something. Imagine something simple, like a balloon." Vegeta held his hand in front of him. "Now, the balloon is right in front of your face. You're not imagining it. It's not invisible. It's really there. You can see it. You can hear it. It is right there. Now," Vegeta moved his hand and made a fist, "grab the string and touch it."
Lord Fire Whirl, and the children of the council all laughed. Along with many unicorns.
"That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever—-"
"I did it!"
Every pony spun around and looked at Prince Eric holding a pink balloon.
"Look," he turned to the margrave. "You did it too! And Friherre Eetu!"
The ponies looked around as more and more of the other races present manifested balloons. Some even escaped and floated up to the ceiling.
"Princess Luna, what is this fabrication!" Lord Fire Whirl wheeled around.
"I have done nothing, Lord Fire Whirl. Everyone is simply doing as Prince Vegeta instructed."
Suddenly a huge number of balloons rose in the air at once.
Prince Eric was making them one after another laughing. "31, 32, 33…"
"Alright Balloon Boy, that's enough happiness for now. Save some for the rest of us."
All the ambassadors chuckled and Prince Eric blushed.
"Now, is everyone satisfied I can make a whiteboard without using magic?" Vegeta said, raising his hand. All the non-pony races and even a few ponies raised their front limbs.
Vegeta nodded. Then he turned around and turned the chalkboard into a whiteboard.
Vegeta uncapped a marker. "Ok beings, now this is what I know from my basic education plus a little extra I learned so not to make an idiot of my wife in front of her colleagues."
"Why does a prince only have a basic education?" Marquess Metis asked.
"Because I was a slave for half of it, then I got the basic degree I needed to function as a normal person on Earth. Plus some extra specific to my wife's field of work."
"And what is your wife's field of work?" he continued.
"She's a physicist and inventor like her father. Between the two of them, they have enough Nobel prizes to line every wall in the mansion. I find plenty just randomly thrown in drawers when looking for stuff. Oh, the Nobel prize is the highest prize you can get."
The various griffons glanced at each other.
"Stay quiet," Olov warned Prince Eric.
"And what is a physicist?" Count Piedmont asked.
Vegeta had an unamused look on his face, already guessing the next outburst. "Physics. Physical. How stuff works."
"So, she's an atomite?" Lord Fire Whirl said to more laughter. "And what qualifications does she have?"
"A PhD. It stands for Philosophy—something. I can't really remember…" Vegeta turned back to the board to start writing.
"A Philosopher's?! Your ponies give out Philosopher's in atomics?!" Lord Fire Whirl ranted. "That's the biggest insult I've ever heard. What did atomics ever do for your wife?"
"Time Travel," Vegeta said, starting to draw. "She discovered the physics behind it and created a working machine. It's been used in war several times."
"But time travel cannot change the past! Starswirl the Bearded said so!" Twilight shouted.
"It can if you break it," Vegeta said, still drawing, "and isn't that the guy that died when the princesses were kids? That's thousands of years ago."
"Starswirl was the greatest mage that ever lived! No one has ever surpassed him!"
"That explains why you're all stuck so far in the past," Vegeta finished drawing
"Twilight," Celestia scolded.
But Twilight was too far gone.
"Changing time goes against the very foundation of harmony magic!"
Vegeta turned around ready to teach, "Then what about chaos magic?"
"Harmony is the final fundamental force in magic, chaos is just some strange subset no pony has figured out the formulas for yet! Everything comes from then goes back to harmony!"
Vegeta turned to her and held his fists out, "Or, they are separate but coequal types of magic," he raised them slightly and brought them together, "that combine into a greater whole."
"That's imposs—"
"Twilight!" All three princesses shouted, stomping their hooves.
Twilight snapped out of her rant and stumbled back startled. She landed on her butt to the laughter of the room.
"Alright! Break it up! And let's get this started!" Vegeta shouted.
The room went silent.
Vegeta pointed at his first drawing. "The fabric of reality is always shaking and trembling with the power of creation." He made a plate with a jello mold appear, "like a bunch of jello." He shook it as an example before popping it away.
He pointed at the next picture. "But like ripples when you drop something in water, it can compile to tear a drop off. This is a particle. There are several types I don't know the name of, but they interact and fuse to form the Big Three," he tapped each circle with a different charge symbol. "Electron with a negative electric charge. Proton with a positive charge. And Neutron, as in neutral. No charge."
He tapped the next picture. "These combine in different combinations to form atoms. Each type of atom has its very own unique combination. The way each substance behaves is dictated by its internal arrangement of protons, neutrons, and electrons.
"This drawing is a Hydrogen atom, one proton and one electron in orbit. This is a Helium atom. Two protons, two neutrons, and two electrons."
Vegeta took off the cap of his marker again. "This box with horns is the basic shape of the Periodic Table of Elements. There are over one hundred elements discovered or made so far, and theoretically, the number of protons can go up forever, but there is a practical limit I'll mention in a second."
As he continued to speak, the griffons were looking more and more nervous.
"Is this really all necessary?" Irmhild tried to interrupt again.
"Yes, now be quiet," Vegeta said, not even looking. He began circling places on the table, "Hydrogen is here. Helium is here. Carbon, Oxygen, and Nitrogen are over here. Metals like iron, copper, gold, silver, and stuff are all over here." Then he circled the two separate lines below. "And the really poisonous stuff is down here. Now I don't know the specifics, maybe ask my wife later on, but when you group elements by protons and by how they combine with other elements, you get this shape. That's all I can really tell you. Now, are we done with this so I can go on to the next part?"
"Why are the poisonous ones separated?" Lord Fire Whirl asked, still not believing any of this.
"All these elements react the same way, they all just happen to be poisonous."
"Why are they poisonous?"
"That's none of your business."
"And why is that? Is it because this is all made up?!" he said thinking he caught him in a lie.
"Ok, everyone!" Vegeta said, slamming his marker down. "Since this pony never learned the basics, what's the definition of poison? Hands, hooves, whatever up."
Prince Rasheed was one of the beings who raised his hoof.
"Yes, and you are?"
"Prince Rasheed of Saddle Arabia."
"Nice to meet you. Now what is the definition of poison?"
"Something that can harm or kill someone."
"And what is poison sometimes used for?"
"To murder."
Vegeta raised his hand towards him smiling. "See! Now this horse actually studied his vocabulary in school."
The ambassadors chuckled while many ponies seethed.
"Enough of this nonsense!" Lord Fire Whirl shouted, stomping his hoof. "Let's get back to what really matters, DARK MAGE."
Vegeta crossed his arms and the whiteboard vanished behind him. "Ok then, shoot."
"Shoot what?"
"Your question! Shoot your question."
"With what? That makes no sense! You're insane. This proves it."
"Shooting a question is a common phrase in Trottingham. Comes from our proud archery history. It means to let loose your question like an arrow from a bow. The only thing insane here is the ignorance on display from the magical council."
There was a lot of stomping and even whinnies from the crowd.
"Alright! That's enough," Vegeta shouted.
The room died down.
"My question is…" he said angrily, "If you have no history with magic, then why do you think chaos and harmony are equals? What gives you the right to even comment such an absurdity?"
"The history of physics on Earth had a similar problem that lasted three hundred years. It was only solved recently by my wife's father.
"There are four forces that govern particles. Electromagnetism, Strong force, Weak force, and Gravity. Through a lot of work, scientists were able to combine the electromagnetic, strong, and weak forces into one formula, but they could never fit gravity. Until my father-in-law. He wasn't even trying. He was writing out the physics of the invention that made him rich and someone else realized what he'd done in the process and not even noticed. Physics operated under two fundamentally incompatible sets of laws, one for large objects, one for small, for centuries. And that sounds like what is happening here. If Chaos won't fit into Harmony, then there's most likely something above it that both fit into."
While Lord Fire Whirl went on another rant with chime-ins from the mage houses, Twilight had a contemplative look on her face. She zapped a scroll and quill and started scribbling.
"What do you think you are doing, Princess Twilight?" Earless Boltz suddenly shouted, "Don't give him legitimacy! Whatever knowledge he has is through the dark arts!"
"How many times do we have to say I can't use magic normally?" Vegeta said loudly.
"Then what is this terrible fire magic mentioned all over the papers?!" a random pony shouted.
"It's called ki," Vegeta said. "Ki is your life energy. Now if you have all of this sucked out of you, you will die. Individuals are born with different amounts and ease of manipulation, but in the end, anyone can train and increase it. Ki is like earth magic as it increases strength, stamina, and healing. It is like pegasus magic as it can let you fly. It is like unicorn magic in many ways, but my training as a soldier specializes in using it to destroy."
"Ki is not real!" an elderly pony called out. "My parents were the last ambassadors to set foot on Neighpon. This ki nonsense was used to justify the worst pony abuses! I saw it all firsthand! And Princess Celestia led the pony kingdoms to fully blockade the islands into submission. We should have never ended it and let them back out into the world! Damn Wu, Weigh, Samhock and their pirate empires. We should have burned every blade of grass in Asia to the ground and rescued every foal and brought them back for adoption into loving homes!"
Vegeta crossed his arms. "I see genocide is alive and well on this planet."
"If the former director of Colt Protective Services says it's horrible, then it must be beyond nightmares!" a pony shouted.
Duke Poppycock and Blarney smiled at each other. This was unexpected, but more than welcome.
"Yes, ki is not real and is even worse than dark magic because dark magic actually exists! Black magic can only be wielded by those who have done unspeakable crimes," Lord Fire Whirl said, "Murder, torture, stealing candy from babies. You confess to these crim— you're laughing!"
Vegeta smiled, "I've never heard stealing candy from babies as an equal to torturing and murdering said baby."
"Then you've stolen candy from babies?!" a pony shouted.
"What the fucking hell is wrong with you people?!" Vegeta shouted. "A baby can't eat candy with its hands cut off or fucking DEAD! Get your gods damn priorities straight!"
There were a lot of nods from the other races and looks of scorn at the offending noble.
"Do you confess to your crimes?" Lord Fire Whirl demanded again.
Vegeta tilted his head slightly, glaring at the stallion. "Oh I confess. I confess to horrors that will make whatever god or demon your religion thinks of as the epitome of pure evil puke."
"Vegeta, temper," Celestia said.
"Don't try and control him," Duke Poppycock shouted. "You claim he's reformed and not dangerous, let him speak his mind and prove it!"
Ponies stomped their hooves in approval.
Celestia sighed, annoyed.
Cadence facehooved.
Twilight got antsy and started tapping her front hooves.
"Vegeta, do try and not give us extra workload in the dream world in the following nights," Luna asked.
Vegeta looked at her apologetically, "Sorry Luna. I can't make that promise." He turned back around. "Seems some of your ponies are rather thick headed so I may need to get more descriptive than you would like," he said with venom in his voice.
Lord Fire Whirl stopped his foot loudly, "Do you feel any remorse for these 'horrors' you committed?"
Vegeta crossed his arms. "I have no interest in repeating the acts of my youth."
"Do you REGRET what you did? Will you APOLOGIZE for your actions in front of everyone here?"
"Fuck No!" he shouted.
Everyone gasped.
Celestia gritted her teeth.
Vegeta raised his hands to shoulder height in a hoity pose. "I believe there's been a language barrier again," he said arrogantly. "Seems I need to describe in more detail what genocide entails like I had to with the princesses and Discord. It means extinction," he stressed.
"I see many horses in the crowd. Ambassadors from many different nations. Saying Kakarot and I are the last of our kind was not that we are the last of a nation, we are the last of a species." Vegeta pointed, "I see many clothing doubles out there, imagine you and the one next to you are the only ones left of your entire species. Everyone and everything dead. Nations, peoples, cultures, languages, everything erased from existence except you and the one next to you. No archeology, no written records, no artifacts. The map swiped clean into oblivion, with no proof you ever existed at all except the memories in your head, and even that will vanish soon after your deaths, because there is nothing worth remembering in the eyes of the universe. You are nothing. Even the dirt on your feet and the filth that comes from an animal's behind has more worth and practical uses than you. You're not even worth fertilizer, a meal, the leather of your skin, or the ashes of your bones used in ink when you die."
Vegeta hit his heart with his fist. "I was THREE when I was taken as a royal hostage from my father and people to the galactic tyrant Emperor Frieza. He ruled hundreds of planets and was always expanding his holdings." Vegeta suddenly paused. He turned around, "What's this planet's name?"
"Equus," Luna said.
Vegeta raised his arms again, "Hundreds of Equuses. And I was FIVE when I became one of the LAST. I know many of the species here grow and age at very different rates. Three for my kind can walk and has basic motor functions, but only knows a few hundred words and cannot string them together. Five, a normal child can form basic sentences and the more linguistically talented can hold a conversation. Three or its biological equivalent is considered an ADULT in the empire because the last thing a master needs is a slave that can talk back."
He dropped his arms. "I came of age at three. I was on the front lines of the expansion wars. Conquest. Slavery. Extinction. Planet after planet. Equus after Equus. One after another until they all blend together for what unfortunately counts as my earliest memories.
"But I wasn't just a normal soldier, no, my life was a game. A source of amusement for the emperor." He formed his fists at his sides. "It's why he personally made sure I survived— when he personally came and broke our planet into asteroids. Killing every scrap of life in the void of SPACE," he snarled.
"I was always isolated when I wasn't fighting. Small, freezing, pitch black room. One day I wasn't let out. And then meals suddenly stopped. Liquids were given at first, but then it trailed off into nothing. I later learned it had been three weeks when I was dragged out and thrown into an arena. I was almost blind from the sudden light. But I heard clearly that I was the warm-up prey for a slave battle tournament for the emperor's amusement as feast entertainment for his guests. Yes, they would watch people kill and torture each other while gorging themselves on wine and food.
"I won that fight to the silence of the crowd. Then Frieza laughed. He congratulated me, then said I must be hungry and thirsty. I had my reward, but I needed to hurry because they needed to clear the ring for the next fight.
"And that was the first fight of many where I ate flesh raw and wet my dry mouth with fresh blood."
Everyone was turning green, except for the griffons and a few other races he did not recognize.
"But then Frieza got bored of me. He sent me back out with the army. But every unit I was added to was given no supplies. When the commanders questioned why, they were killed. Then their replacements were told I was the reason they were given absolutely nothing to eat or drink. And if they wanted their supplies back, everyone knew what they had to do.
"I came back the only survivor of that mission. I was tortured because the logical conclusion was that I hid and finished off the stragglers. And after another round of starvation, I was sent out again, this time with a high-ranking soldier to make sure I didn't run and hide." He moved his arm like he was flicking a stone on the ground, "And when I returned, I threw his severed head at the landing crew's feet."
He raised his voice. "I ripped my right as a sentient living being to take my next breath from the bodies of those sent against me, whether innocent people trying to defend their homes from invasion or Frieza's assassins because I refused to fucking die! And when I finally found the time where everything I went through wouldn't go to waste, I started my rebellion. And even though Kakarot and his Earth warriors get the credit, they ultimately joined MY rebellion when they realized killing everyone and leaving me half dead as a warning did nothing but bring them to Frieza's personal attention. And I was standing right next to them when I saw Frieza die. His father die." Then Vegeta closed his right fist. "And I crushed what was left of his brother with my bare hands," he smiled at it as he remembered smashing the microchip.
Then he held his hands wide. "Am I proud of what I did to get to that point? No, not anymore." Then he brought his hands in and tapped his heart. "But I will NOT APOLOGIZE for asserting my right to breathe! I am a survivor. And there is nothing in the universe more dangerous and terrifying to face than a survivor…" he paused a moment and lowered his arms.
"...who has discovered a reason to throw that away and die!" he continued once they were off guard. "Enemies of the princesses and the bearers! I may only have a decade left in my life, two if I'm lucky." Vegeta smiled like a maniac, "But you would all be better off facing me in my prime than myself as I am now." Vegeta turned and walked back up the dais. He sat down and crossed his arms, "Lecture over. Next question!"
The two Golden Herd ambassadors whinnied and stomped their hooves. "We salute you warrior! The first Khan went through a similar hell before he came to power by his own hooves. You would have become a mighty king if you did not turn your back for a mare."
"Just because the kingdom I chose beats in my wife's chest does not make me any lesser a royal or a warrior. Make no mistake about that."
A minotaur and the centaur next to him clapped next. "Your passion sounds like the epics of old," the centaur said. "She must rival Helena in her beauty."
Vegeta gave an honest smile, and even ponies had to admit his eyes sparkled for a moment. "While her beauty is a bonus, I fell in love with her personality and mind first and foremost. While the word CEO is the business equivalent, she is a powerful queen by any other name. Asking her to leave with me for my own ambitions would have diminished the spark that made me attracted to her in the first place. It was always my ultimate decision to leave and pursue military conquest or to stay and join her business empire."
"On behalf of the Holy Gryphon Empire," Ermendrud said. "I find your use of empire for a lowly merchant insulting."
"Capsule Corporation either directly employs or supports through their workers spending their wages at local businesses like grocers and markets HALF of the entire planet's population. Entire regions thrive or collapse into poverty or are even abandoned in their entirety based on whether there's a factory operating in the area. Research into my family's influence has shown six of ten items in an average home were made by the company directly or the manufactures used our tools to make their products. One in ten of all the money on the entire planet is part of my family's private wealth." He made and held up five coins between his fingers, "Not tied up in a company or assets like real estate, but private bank accounts like any other person who gets a paycheck."
Then he made four of them disappear and began rolling the remaining coin over the top of his fingers. "Even though business taxes are set at less than 1%, my family's taxes make up 37% of the planetary government's budget. Yes, I said planetary government. Can your empire brag about ruling the entire planet? Every square inch of water and dirt? If lowly peasants can unite across an entire planet to rule themselves through elected governments, what's your nobilities' excuse?" Then he flicked the coin up in the air with his thumb and the coin vanished with a little flash. "You're obviously superior to people like my wife, right?"
"What you described is completely impossible! You are spouting nothing but lies," Irmhild shouted. He looked at Celestia, "We will hold Equestria personally responsible for this outrageous insult."
"Is it though?" the Trottingham ambassador said. "Most of our counties have parliaments and diets of some kind. And the lower houses are full of the sons of bankers and the great guild houses that do most of the labor of governance while nobles enjoy the season or retreat to their country estates."
"And you should be one to talk," the Prench ambassador said, "You just used votes of succession as the excuse to invade southern Jutland. I wonder how those peasants will feel once their local burghers are replaced by toga-wearing winos."
"Before this escalates further!" Duke Poppycock shouted to gain control of the conversation. "It seems some of the other races are quite blind. That impassioned speech is clearly him trying to paint himself as a victim."
Vegeta's eye twitched.
"It seems you don't agree? Or was that twitch because you thought us stupid enough to fall for such obvious schemes."
"He's right," Lord Fire Whirl said. "In that bestial speech, he clearly stated he embraced the darkness at an early age. Any normal foal would have died. You were broken from the start. And this greater dark mage you called emperor only recognized that and turned you into exactly what he wanted."
"Then why—"
Vegeta raised his hand, "I got this, Celestia." He lowered his arm. "You are exactly right. Frieza saw I had potential, as he put it, so he made me his new favorite toy. Frieza was almost as old as Celestia and Luna, but biologically, he was the equivalent of an older teenager, no longer a child but still not a fully matured adult. Again, my species lived 70-80 years on average, maybe reaching the 90s or 100 by chance and extensive medical intervention. But peak performance is reached much earlier before even perfectly healthy individuals start to decline. Half that time or slightly less. And even perfection was never enough for that man."
Vegeta leaned forward, putting his elbow on one knee and his hand on the other. He looked around. "I. Was. A. Toy. To a bored, overgrown child, whose daddy decided to hand his empire over to him because he had become bored also and wanted to see what his bratty teenager could do when given control of the largest military in the galaxy at the time. Six hundred years of carnage and destruction — was a game. And I decided I did not want to play anymore. Let the generals and other upstarts fight over the corpse while smaller empires snap up the edges. I like having a bed. I like having food, water, more than one change of clothes and having more than one choice of uniform. I like having the person sneaking up behind me trying to do a surprise hug instead of fucking trying to kill me. The rest of the galaxy views survival and living as the synonyms, but Earth taught me it is NOT. And I chose to live."
Vegeta leaned back and raised his hand again. "And I will say one more thing, since clearly that unicorn has figured out one of my tells is my uncontrollable eye twitches. Victim and survivor are not the same thing either. A victim lives or dies because the aggressor wills it. A survivor lives because they stole that power from their adversary. Stop calling me a victim. It insults the people I've killed. Ponies are all about empathy and compassion RIGHT?"
Vegeta saw a lot of nods from the other races.
Celestia leaned in to Luna, "As glad as I am for him finding allies with the ambassadors, he seems to be turning them against us."
"We know," Luna whispered back. "There are emotions of agreement from many ponies, but between their own biases and the duke and first wizard publicly opposing him, they feel great guilt for those thoughts."
"How many do we have if we can shake the duke up?"
"A little less than a quarter so far."
"There is an obvious hole in your argument, dark mage," a mare next to Lord Fire Whirl stepped forward.
"And your name is?"
"I am Countess Paladine of House Hospitaller. We have patronized medical advances in magic from before the three tribes united."
"Alright, light blue mare, what's this hole in my logic?"
"Excuse me?" she said, offended, "Did you not hear my name?"
"And did all of you not hear mine? It's Vegeta. I'm not even demanding titles and honorifics. Just Vegeta. Or hell, call me Geets! I hate that nickname. All of you want to piss me off so I speak my mind? Geets is a great start."
She bristled. "Alright, Dark Mage Geets. In your philosophy, you say you're a survivor, not a victim. But under that definition, aren't you a victim of this Kakarot? Shouldn't you be raging to kill this stallion instead of being friends with him?"
Vegeta nodded, "Yes. And if you had met me in my thirties, I was exactly what you described. The surrender of that ambition is only…" his face blanked, then he looked down and began touching his thumb to his fingers. "… longer than I thought… Gods I'm old…"
He did not continue.
"You? Surrender?" she continued. "After that impassioned speech about stealing your breath from the lives of others? Then what changed? What wonderful miracle caused this drastic shift in personality?"
Vegeta paused. He lowered his head and the ponies in the room were trying to convince themselves his drooping shoulders looked like anything else but shame.
Vegeta took a steadying breath and opened his eyes. "An event happened to me that I have learned is called a geas in your language."
There was a collective gasp from the entire room.
Vegeta looked like he was weighing his words carefully. "Almost twenty years ago, Earth was attacked by one of those empires gnawing at the edges. The people who came to Earth that had been fighting them for centuries said they were led by a near unbeatable dark mage, to use your words, with an unbreakable mind control spell. To the point those who fell under it were declared dead and treated like walking corpses."
He took a breath. "There is a phenomenon Earthlings call 'the call of the void'. A sudden, overwhelming thought to do something violent and stupid. Earthlings use the example of a perfectly rational, mentally sound, and healthy individual who cannot fly by any means looking out over a nature vista and getting a sudden brief urge to jump off the cliff to their deaths."
"How can a 'healthy' individual have those thoughts, even for a split second?" Marquess Metis said loudly. "This whole race is clearly deranged."
"It is not deranged," the minotaur spoke up. "We call it the alluring."
"My mother said ponies call it 'the whisper'," Prince Eric spoke up.
"Your family has a history of insanity going back generations," Marquess Metis said. "Your opinion is invalid."
"It's called porphyria," the Trottingham ambassador shouted angrily. "And griffon doctors have done more to treat it than any of you! It is a disease, not a mark of character. Take back that insult against the royal family right now!"
"Discolored urine has nothing to do with insanity," Countess Paladine, "A dysfunction of the kidneys having anything to do with the mind is completely absurd."
As the argument grew, Vegeta had a sudden look of recognition. He turned to Celestia. "Does bleeding also run in that royal family?" he whispered.
She lowered her head to whisper back. "Yes, many of Queen Victorious Morals' sons and grandsons have bled to death very young. Another parallel?"
"Remember when I said my son likes fantasies based in the Victorian Era? I… tried to be the cool dad once and fell flat on my face."
"Oh…" Celestia said, making the connection. "I'd not bring this up."
"And what are you whispering about with the dark mage, Princess Celestia?" Lord Fire Whirl spoke up.
The argument stopped and everyone turned back to the dais.
"Prince Vegeta simply asked for clarification about your argument," Princess Celestia said, raising her head.
"And what is his opinion?" Duke Poppycock asked. "He clearly has opinions considering his comments on magic."
Vegeta sighed, "Because I saw parallels between magic and physics. I don't know jack shit about medicine except using the basic equipment consistently used on me as a soldier. I'm sure my wife will have more answers and resources, but I don't know shit."
"'Ask your wife' seems to be your standard answer."
"Don't fathers instinctively say 'Ask your mother' on this planet?"
That elicited chuckles. Duke Poppycock looked annoyed.
"Let's go back to this 'Call of the Void'." Marquess Metis said. "Why did you bring it up to begin with?"
The smile returned to the duke's face.
"Because my calls of the void ultimately left me vulnerable to the geas—"
Vegeta got cut off before he could say anything else.
"How?" he demanded.
"I was getting to that before everyone started shouting at each other again," Vegeta said, annoyed. "Introductions go both ways, you know."
"And what is your… impression?" Duke Poppycock asked smugly.
"I see a lot of big egos in this room, but at least I'm self-aware of my own big head before you start calling the kettle black. I suggest a little humility goes a long way. I should have taken that advice long before I finally did."
Vegeta sighed and rubbed the back of his neck, "Now, as I was saying before everything exploded again…
"I… I think the clearest example I can give from my own experience," he looked uncomfortable. "is… after … passionate marital activities, when you're about to place your arm over her and spoon yourselves to sleep. A sudden thought rips through your body like lightning. 'What the fuck are you doing? Kill this woman and leave. You should be carving your empire in blood.' And you jump out of bed and run from the room, leaving her confused and pissed. And you can't tell her why, because you'd rather be hated than feared… Or … my young son trying to sneak up behind me. I know he's there. I know he's just being silly. That I need to just be a dad and let him think he's clever. But my body always turned around. Then I get screamed at for the bruise on his face or arm. I partially broke early on and went to doctors behind my family's back. But even though we were close enough to interbreed, the genetic gap was too great for the medicine to work. Kakarot had left Earth for a religious pilgrimage. He had done it before, no one gave it any mind. He grew up in a temple and was a candidate to succeed the leader of the entire faith and hand selected the ultimate successor because no one would oppose him. Seven fucking years. His youngest son was born and I helped raise in that time!"
Vegeta took a breath and calmed down. "I hyper fixated on his absence. My misery, and the misery I was causing to everyone around me despite my best efforts were all his fault. Then the idiot returned for a day. And I had my chance. I was going to put him in the ground permanently and everything was going to be right with the universe. Then Earth was attacked that same day. I was angry. I was impatient."
Vegeta raised his head. "The call of the void rang in my head with a bunch of stupid thoughts. Like if only I was on the other side, I could get my fight with Kakarot. … Then I screamed from what easily passed as the worst pain in my life… We've decided to tell the young children I don't remember what happened next, what I did, until they are older, but that's a lie. If I had truly blacked out like the many thousands before me, we wouldn't be having this conversation. But I didn't. Not completely. But I also wasn't fast enough clawing my body back under control. While I could refuse most orders, any that aligned with the call of the void I did without hesitation. I attacked Kakarot like the rabid lunatic I was with no thoughts of who and what were around me. And it wasn't until he tricked me and let me knock him unconscious that I was able to start pulling myself back.
"But by then there was irreparable damage and we barely clawed victory out of the pit I created. I surrendered after that, to Kakarot's goodness as much as his strength. I won't say everything was instantly better, but that scare pushed me to be honest and get the help I needed. And Kakarot ended his journey and came back permanently." He gave a pained smirk, "And his constant nagging presence in my life became annoying for the complete opposite reason."
Vegeta closed his eyes and took a breath, "I am broken. Broken in ways Princess Luna has not seen in centuries, not including the memory gap from her magical coma. But she was the first of your rulers to conclude I was not dangerous. Because she can see directly into my head. Then my actions proved it to Princess Celestia and Twilight. And finally, Princess Cadence. And now we are here trying to convince the rest of you."
"Then Princess Cadence," Marquess Metis turned his interrogation to her, "You battled against King Sombra for days. You understand the dangers of dark mages and have seen the trauma it causes first hand better than most ponies alive. What convinced you he was safe?"
Cadence sighed annoyed, "During Vegeta's attempt to heal Pinkie Pie, he shattered his mind like a glass mirror. And Princess Luna took the four of us plus Discord in a deep dive to put him back together. Discord noticed he was reacting to my presence differently. He concluded that my love magic was making him think I was his wife. Which was confirmed when it started raining flowers, plush animals, and heart shaped chocolate. In the end I was the only one to get him to wake up by convincing him his wife forgave him for what I assume was the geas from the conversation."
"How did you convince him?" Blarney asked. "Was it sexual? Did you need to let him rape you to escape his mind?"
Every pony gasped horrified.
"No!" "Fuck No!" Cadence and Vegeta shouted at the same time.
"You seem defensive," Blarney pressed. "If it wasn't sexual, then how did she do it, Prince Vegeta? In detail?"
"I don't remember anything that happened while I was broken, other than a vague impression that my wife was there, but I know that was actually Princess Cadence now."
"What a convenient explanation," Blarney said.
"I'm not defending him," Countess Paladine said. "But not remembering is completely normal for coma patients when mind dives are used to wake them up. He is believable on that point," she said frustrated.
"Then you, Princess Cadence? In detail."
"Yes, Princess Cadence! What did he do to you?" a pony demanded panicked.
"After I was teleported away from the others, I found myself in what Princess Luna said was the innermost corner of his mind. He was groveling at an imposing and immobile projection of his wife. I discovered I had some control over it and tried to comfort him and convince him she loved him gently like any normal pony. That did not work and he even drew back shouting she was not acting normally. I became frustrated and tried to think about what to do next. Then I lost control of the image. My frustration fed into the image and it savagely attacked Vegeta while screaming 'I love you' in a ghastly act of domestic violence." She looked at Vegeta, "That worked and he woke up. I try not to think about why."
"It's… It's not like she hits me often!" Vegeta tried to defend her, "And never in front of the kids. She's extremely kind. I'm just stupid and stubborn sometimes. Percussive maintenance."
"You think getting beaten is equal to smacking a machine in frustration trying to get it to work?" the Feligypt ambassador said, "That's awful."
"Well, I'm awful! Stop insulting my wife! This line of questioning ends right now! Move on!"
Most of the ponies froze, terrified at the outburst.
Poppycock stopped Blarney from pushing the matter. They had what they wanted.
"I have a question," Countess Paladine spoke up after catching her breath, "HOW did you heal Lady Pinkie Pie? What technique does Princess Luna want us to study in detail despite its obvious inferiority, judging by what was reported by its botched healing and your near death and shattered mind?"
"It's also the only reason she is alive after everything else failed, but sure I'll describe it."
He stood again. "First, some backstory. When Luna and I found ourselves trapped in the mindscape during the first accident, she was unconscious for most of it, despite everything I tried to wake her up. I was also partially aware of the outside, so I knew she was injured by whatever happened. In one of the many religions practiced across the human tribes of Earth, there is a practice called stigmata. The founder of that religion was tortured and crucified to death. Through prayer and intense concentration," Vegeta held his palms up, "they can cause themselves to bleed in the same locations of his wounds. So, I knew that there was precedence for the mind manifesting injuries on the body. I made a lucky guess healing could be done the same way. I'm sure everyone has had the experience of spending time and having real conversations and other interactions with friends and family only to wake up and discover the whole thing was a dream, and even looking back on it, you can't believe it did not happen. Using lucid dreaming, I manifested a healer I know and set him loose. And it worked. She regained consciousness after her injuries disappeared, then she got us both to wake up. Just in time, too. When I finally was able to open my eyes, there was a sword about to go through my neck. Then Luna charged into the room and ripped it out of my executioner's hooves."
He looked back at Celestia, "I don't blame Princess Celestia. Honestly, I'm surprised any ruler would wait two hours to make that choice to begin with, but I'm not going to argue with still being alive."
"That's impossible," Lord Fire Whirl interrupted, "To even begin to think of that as a possibility would require—"
"Layering," Vegeta interrupted. "That's what Princess Luna calls it. And she freaks out every time I do it."
There was a collective gasp and look of horror from the mages in the room. "That breaks the first rule of mind magic!" Lord Fire Whirl shouted. "This is the exact reason why we need to send foal teachers to reeducate the crystal ponies with the advances of the past thousand years! No wonder you 'broke like a mirror'."
"Don't say such things about my subjects," Cadence stomped her hoof. "Being cast 1200 years into the future does not mean we eradicate their entire history and culture for the sake of modernity."
"You are a princess of Equestria."
Cadence lifted her head tall. "I am Empress of the Crystal Empire and will protect my ponies as such."
"You would go to war with Equestria?" Blarney pounced at the chance.
"If it came to that. Yes."
"As any ruler should," Celestia cut in. "Equestria has always and will continue to fully support the independence of the Crystal Empire. We would be disappointed in Princess Cadence if she turned her position to the sole benefit of Equestria instead of rebuilding the empire and securing its rightful place as an equal in the eyes of the other nations. She and Prince Shining Armor are not a puppet government in any form. Eulope has many intermarriages and nobles who have moved countries to take over fiefdoms from foreign relatives. Yet no one would call any of these nobles puppets or accuse them of treason."
Vegeta looked at Luna and Cadence, "If these crystal ponies use layering as part of their spell casting, maybe they can look at me with fresh eyes. Maybe they already have a working healing technique instead of trying to reinvent the wheel."
"That is a good idea," Luna beamed with happiness. She looked expectantly at Cadence.
She nodded. "I will send word once this is over. The sooner we figure out Prince Vegeta's magic the better."
Vegeta nodded and looked back at the room, "Any other questions anyone can think of? I'm sure the rumor mills have been busy."
A pony hesitantly raised her hoof, "Did Celestia really break your horn off?"
"No." Vegeta said, matter of factly.
The pony sighed relieved.
"I broke my own horn off."
Every unicorn looked horrified.
"Why?!" a stallion shouted.
"I lost control of my magic. I felt a similar sensation from when the geas washed over my mind, and from what little I knew from my daughter's stories, magic comes from the horn. So I snapped it off."
"You could have died!"
"So I was told when I woke up in the hospital. As Discord says, I'm a glutton for punishment."
"How many times have you almost died the past few days?" a pony said.
Vegeta looked thoughtful then began counting on his fingers.
"Nevermind! I don't want to know."
"It's ok," Vegeta grinned, holding up his fingers. "Only four off the top of my head. That's not bad at all."
Several ponies shivered.
"Anything else? Even something silly like my favorite color?"
"I'll bite," Pixiu raised his paw, "What's your favorite color?"
"I like blues and purples. My wife thinks I look good in pink however and keeps buying me shirts… I think she just does it to annoy me. Same song and dance for three decades."
"Do you wear these shirts?" one of the Golden Herd asked.
"Only in the house every once in a while, wouldn't be caught dead outside. Especially when she's having a bad day, I'll go get flowers, change my shirt, and sneak up on her. Happy wife. Happy life."
The room was starting to relax.
"That's cute," a mare said.
Vegeta put his hands in his pockets, "Yeah. One of the few things I can do right. Anything else?"
"What are your hobbies other than cannibalism and murder?" Blarney said sarcastically.
The room tensed up again.
Vegeta glared at him. "Why? Are they also yours?" he said, matching his sarcastic tone. "Looking for a guest for dinner?"
Duke Poppycock seethed. "How—"
"How DARE YOU!" Vegeta said dramatically comically waving his arms. "This is an outrage!" He changed the pitch of his voice to sound more feminine and pointed, "Don't you know who I am?! Obey me, peasant!"
He smiled and shoved his hands back in his pockets, "Is that about right?"
Ponies were doing everything not to laugh at the powerful duke.
The ambassadors had no such concerns.
"But all seriously, I like to ice skate. Does it get cold enough for water to freeze here?"
"Yes," Celestia said. "We have winter here and if by ice skating you mean moving on ice using metal blades on boots, then our worlds have the same thing."
"Oh good," he looked back at the room. "Maybe when I get my real body back, I'll show off."
"How did you get into ice skating?" a Muskox asked.
"The absolute absurdity of doing acrobatics on ice while balancing on the sharpened edge of knives strapped to your feet was too much not to check out. It was actually how I started seeing my wife in the first place." Vegeta smiled. "I can't say much because it involved the artifact being stolen but my wife and I bonded over all the pranks and petty revenge I helped her with after the fact."
"Like what?"
"Oh, like breaking into her ex's apartment, stealing all his clothes, and replacing them with pink tutus and glitter capes that had 'I cheated' embroidered on them. Then we stole his car, which legally was still in her name so she basically stole her own property and he couldn't do anything about it. Drew a bunch of dongs like the immature fucks we still are even at this age." Vegeta crossed his arms and had an intense look on his face. "Gods, what else did we do to that bastard… let me think a moment…"
"I think we get the idea," Celestia said giggling.
"You sure? There's the part where I had to knock out his roommate and jump out the window and book it to the car. She was the getaway driver."
Most of the chuckles instantly stopped. Except for one pony.
"The marchioness would like to know if car is the word for carriage in your language?" Robin Song asked as Lady Pumpernickel was gripping her sides.
"It's a specific type of carriage, yes."
"What happened to the pony you knocked out?" a pony asked tentatively.
"He only grayed out and never lost consciousness. I didn't hit him that hard. It was just messing with them, not actual combat. But then afterwards we went to get ice cream and that was that."
"How do you know he did not lose consciousness?" another asked.
"Mutual friend group. They actually became friends again and he was a major babysitter. Being in the same military unit, feuds lasting too long compromises effectiveness and they had been in a cycle of breaking up and getting back together since they were pre-adults. So, maybe ten-fifteen years by the time we met." Vegeta sighed and raised his palm. "Yes, my geas is the perfect example of what not to do. I am an asshole. A nice asshole trying to un-asshole-ify himself. But still an asshole."
"One, that is not a word. Two, you are claiming reformation? To what end? What is your goal so late in life?" Irmhild demanded.
"I want my children to remember me fondly. And know that despite my struggles, when I had a choice, I walked away from the violence I knew all my life to be with them."
"You always had a choice," Lord Fire Whirl said. "You chose violence and death."
"Ok, bastard. You a grandfather?"
"Why?" he said suspiciously.
"Ok. Take a toddler. Kill their mother in front of them. Then tell them if you don't kill this random person, you'll kill Daddy. What do you think your grandchildren will do? Save Daddy or freak out so bad the person kills daddy and then kills them and moves on to the next toddler."
"That preserves their purity."
Vegeta suddenly laughed. He gripped his stomach and bent over.
"What's so funny?" Lord Fire Whirl demanded.
Vegeta leaned up, trying to take deep breaths to stop. "You really think that? Oh, you're in for a shock. I'll make sure to wave at you when I get frog marched past your cell in hell."
"What did you just say?!" he shouted.
"Let's look at that scenario from the gods' view." He held up his hand and began raising fingers one by one, "That child committed murder. That child failed to save their father so are culpable for his death no different than the bad man who killed him. The child did not attack and kill the bad person with the weapon. But you could argue the bad man was not dumb and made sure he couldn't be injured, you say? But there is always that one millionth of one percent chance that it could have worked, so not being able to materialize that very unlikely outcome makes them responsible of not only their father's death," Vegeta stopped laughing and gave him a death stare, "but the deaths of every person that bad man kills the rest of his life. Because he failed to stop him. What purity exists in that scenario? The second the bad man looked at the child, they were condemned to hell. And the gods don't give a fuck. And I don't give a fuck about them in return."
Vegeta raised his arms to either side, "You think I'm trying to save my ass with a deathbed baptism or something? Did you forget I am nothing? Worth less than shit? To be forgotten and erased? That's not just the opinion of mortals." Vegeta then pointed at himself again with both hands. "All I want," his voice suddenly cracked, "is my kids not to hate me."
"I think that's enough," Celestia sighed. "Let's move on."
She took a step forward. "Races of Equus. We have an announcement to make, and an apology to give. It has come to our attention and with undeniable truth that ki IS real. And Equestria formally apologizes to Neighpon and the eastern kingdoms who practice the art."
Every pony gasped.
Celestia then raised her hoof towards the group, "If you want more details on how ki works in our world specifically, then we have experts right here from the nations that practice ki here on Equus. If Ambassadors Ferghana of Weigh, Kongque of Wu, Kouma of Neighpon, Gyeongjuma of Samhock, and our esteemed guests Lord Feiyu and Monk Pixiu from the Sacred Lands of Teabit would come forward, we can begin."
Pixiu nodded and moved forward, causing the room to part. Feiyu was next to him, followed by the two horses, peacock, earth pony, and their assistants. Vegeta grabbed his chair as the princesses moved to make room up on the stage.
"Monsters!" the old pony shouted.
"Evil" "Demons!" "Dark wizards!" were among the insults hurled at them as they climbed on stage.
"Do ponies always jump on the bandwagon and snowball like this?" Vegeta whispered to Celestia. "One word and they're a raging mob."
"Yes, this is normal behavior."
Vegeta sighed. "Remind me to tell my wife not to introduce any social media…" he grumbled.
"Greetings beings of the outer nations," Pixiu started.
Suddenly an apple came from the crowd. It stopped mid air in front of Pixiu. He continued to smile and did not react, "I am Monk Pixiu of the Sacred Lands. My dear friend Lord Feiyu and I are the current keepers of the joint shine shared between our neighboring countries." The apple fell to the ground. "We have been in Equestria for five years," he tapped his stomach, "and I must commend your country on your delicious—."
"Who threw that?!" Celestia shouted. "Luna!"
Luna lit her horn, and everyone watched as what had just happened reversed. The room parted as Celestia and Luna marched up to the offending unicorn. She cowered in fear.
"Princesses, I must ask forgiveness in this situation," Pixiu continued to remain calm and smiled, "Even if this was real life and not a dream, it is not like any harm would come of it. Allow the pony to have a chance to learn instead of any punishment."
"The only reason you remain in our dreamplane is by his mercy," Luna glared at the unicorn.
"I will also honor his request of mercy," Celestia said. "But do not offend again."
The two returned to the front leaving the pony crying on the floor.
Pixiu looked sympathetically at the pony before continuing. "Before we delve into ki, we have a story to share about the Sacred Lands encounter with Starswirl the Bearded.
"When he and his group entered Teabit, they had a large mirror with them. They explained it was a portal that had stopped working as Starswirl placed it down in the manor lord's greeting room. The mirror suddenly activated and Starswirl found he could no longer control it or pick it up. He warned everyone to stay away, explaining the danger of the other side, but children don't listen. Some of the lord's children snuck through the mirror and came back with a story of being transformed into a different race and visiting a city where everyone wore the same clothes.
"Starswirl did not believe them as the one and only time he went through the mirror he was not transformed, which the children pointed out to his fury. He went to smash the mirror when several ponies came through. As any responsible adults, they had followed these unknown children. After the raw panic of being transformed into such an anatomically different species, one of them spoke. 'Holy fuck, a talking panda!' And thus were the first words of Lord Hui Fen, the being who introduced Buddhism to our world. The grand city the children spoke of was actually one of the largest temples in the matching country, which they called Tibet. Starswirl eventually threw his hooves up and abandoned the mirror a few weeks later, claiming no one listened to him. The small country manor became our capital city and contact and trade through the mirror flourished for 160 years. We discovered that there was only one race of beings on the other side, and at first the mirror would transform the visitors randomly, but the mirror soon settled on either earth ponies, horses, donkeys, or the occasional panda, and that transformation stayed consistent over successive visits." Pixiu raised his voice proudly, "I am descended from the humans who came through the mirror. As are the majority of our small pony population."
"Oh, shit. Fuck you Shen Long," Vegeta thought.
"But then suddenly for unknown reasons, the mirror closed, trapping many on the wrong side. Starswirl, who had extended his life through the magical arts, was still alive and agreed to take the mirror to try to fix it. The mirror was never returned, as we received word of his death to the heartbreak of many. But life moves forward." He then looked behind him, "Jietang. Li Jing."
A horse in Weigh clothing and a peahen came up, sat down, and held up their front hooves or wings.
Two balls of light formed.
Pixiu turned back to the room "Ki is—"
"This is not real!" the old pony shouted. "Don't be fooled! This is just a projection like what the dark mage did!"
"Silence!" Celestia shouted. She again left the dais, but this time the ponies did not move aside. She recognized them as the ponies who came with Duke Poppycock. She glared at them. "Move," she said forcefully.
"We will not be silent!" The old mare ranted. "Just because the dark mage and you abusers have deceived the princesses does not mean the ponies of this nation will—"
Luna lit her horn and the pony vanished.
"Any pony else who wishes to leave this meeting, keep interrupting," Luna spoke.
Everyone stayed silent but did not change their disdained glares at Celestia.
Celestia returned the look before returning to the dais.
"Our apologies for the interruption. Please continue."
"Thank you," Pixiu bowed. "Now, ki is a being's physical life force, the energy in the body. It can be used up, resulting in exhaustion. The body usually loses consciousness when too much ki is lost, but it can still be a deadly situation. Ki has a fortifying effect, like earth pony magic. Power of the muscles and bones have its limits, but ki can strengthen the body well beyond these limits. No matter the initial amount of ki a being is born with, with training it can be cultivated to great heights with effort. Ki reacts to emotions, which is why Buddhism stresses meditation and mental balance." He looked at Vegeta, "While it is perfectly possible to grow and use ki without these, it is not healthy for the practitioner, especially when cultivated through anger and hate."
He looked back at the room, "Giving ki to another can temporarily solve exhaustion, and those with special gifts can trigger the body to rapidly heal wounds. With much effort, ki can be expressed outside the body, resulting in abilities like flight, levitation, barriers to protect from wind and rain, and peaceful use of breaking objects like removing stones, felling trees, melting snow, and plowing fields. Then there is the martial arts as a form of discipline, training, and meditation.
"When the prayers and practices came over, horses, donkeys and pandas had an easier time manipulating their ki than those who became ponies did. Most ponies who came through the mirror did not have their cutie marks, and those who gained them often lost the ability to use ki in its entirety until they returned to the other side. This led to a lot of study, and it was discovered that in our races, ki lies beyond the mana heart, so ponies naturally had the hardest time as they had to get past the massive amounts of magic they had compared to other races. But it is not insurmountable, and ki was recovered after a few years and has since spread to all beings regardless of if they descended from humans or not. Every living being has ki. Every being can use ki with effort and training. Even alicorns who possess the greatest amount of magic of all of us. And we are willing to teach."
"I have already agreed to these lessons," Celestia interjected. "After seeing how quickly ki was learned by Lady Pinkie Pie just from the simple descriptions Prince Vegeta gave concerning his native species' abilities. While it is clear she is a savant with ki, as Princess Twilight is with magic, I do have every intention to not be outdone."
"We ask that everypony keep an open mind on this," Luna said. "Our biases have proven us deeply wrong, and to grow as a being, one must recognize one's own faults. A new age is starting for Equus. While Prince Vegeta's powers are currently limited, his friends will be coming to Equestria in their native state. Meaning they will have full use of their ki. Both as soldiers and healers, monks and merchants. As the short century the mirror functioned revolutionized the lives of the eastern kingdoms, we are now at the beginning of an era of change. Magic, technology, medicine are all about to be revolutionized for both our planets. And it would be horribly wrong of Equestria to monopolize these gifts. Once things stabilize, we have every intention to encourage the Earth tribes to expand their friendship beyond our borders. There will be other invitations and meetings in the near future, so we ask the embassies to keep this in mind over the next few months to a year."
"Change is hard. Change is scary," Cadence began. "But as I've seen the crystal ponies grow and adapt to the new world they have found themselves in, I know the ponies of Equestria can rise to the occasion and achieve the same feats. 'Time moves forward,' as Pixiu kindly put it, 'And we move forward with it whether we like it or not.'"
"Let's start the questions," Celestia said. "And remain civil," she warned.
"What does ki have to do with the horrible abuses the former CPS director was so adamant about stopping?" one of the ponies that stopped Celestia demanded in a harsh tone.
Kouma spoke. "The reason ponies cannot normally use ki is because a mana heart prevents access. It is why we magic lock our foals until they can use ki proficiently, then slowly remove the locks so they can learn to dig through the barrier and keep the path open in opposition to their magic. Some are able to and can fully practice both." He raised his left front hoof and pulled back his sleeve, revealing a thin metal band. "Many must choose to limit the use of one or the other. That is our way of life, and we will not apologize for it or abandon it. Just because our ponies do not gain their marks until later years compared to Equestrians does not mean we abuse our foals in any way."
"Then why can Prince Vegeta and Lady Pinkie Pie access it?" another demanded.
"I couldn't access my powers until I was 'chained in so many magic locks I couldn't do a card trick', as one of my guards said," Vegeta said. He looked at Pixiu.
Pixiu nodded and turned to the room. "Lady Pinkie was originally born with little magic, making her disabled by Equestrian standards. This was not detected originally because ki's physical enhancements mimic earth pony magic. The mana currently running through her filaments is not native to her body, but was absorbed from the laughter elemental crystal. The scars from the sudden influx are there when looked for. The same for princesses Twilight and Cadence as a result of their ascensions."
"And how do you know what these 'scars' look like?" Countess Paladine asked skeptically. "I have never heard of this."
"If a child's shackles are removed too quickly, it will leave a mark." Kouma said. "While it has no effect on magic use, it does hamper ki access. Which is why no one else recognizes it as a problem."
"Then why does Lady Pinkie Pie still have access after becoming a bearer?" she said.
"Because of her sheer amount," Ferghana said. "I've been ambassador to Equestria for twenty years. I felt a strong light the moment I entered the city off in the distance, and I have felt it grow in brilliance and strength until it blazed like the sun. And the handful of times in recent years when that light entered the city, it was physically painful. Then yesterday by the clock, everyone in the embassies who can sense ki almost fell over from a huge wave of power." He looked at Feiyu, "Lord Feiyu risked being accosted by pegasi, again, to see, and he saw the source of the bright light for the first time. A pink earth pony flying through the air with a look of terror on her face. He followed her and a few moments later she crashed through the open balcony door of a rich pony's home. When her ki nearly vanished moments later, he looked in and saw her on top of another pony, bleeding from a wound facing the window, unconscious, and everyone in the room in panic. He rushed back and told us what he saw. He said it was a huo qiang wound, and we all admonished him, saying that weapon did not exist in Equestria. But we were all proven wrong when the lesser princesses came to our embassies searching for information on the black powder that prevented the closing of the wound by normal magic."
"Lord Feiyu!" Celestia leaped up and landed in front. "You saw it? You really saw it?"
Feiyu nodded.
"Why did you not tell us?"
Feiyu twisted.
"He says 'What pony would believe a kintu'on after the near daily murder attempts by your pegasi since he arrived 5 years ago? This is why we abandoned this continent to its fate and wish upon you the mercy of heaven you have no business receiving otherwise." Pixiu answered.
Celestia's ears and wings drooped. "Lord Feiyu, on behalf—"
Lord Feiyu turned around showing his tail.
"I believe you have your answer princess," Pixiu said. "Please allow us to continue."
Celestia nodded and walked around the group returning to her spot.
"This thing clearly has a grudge against ponies! How can we trust anything it claims to say if this is not just a giant ruse in and of itself! Who ever heard of a race of talking clouds?!" Duke Poppycock shouted.
"We have seen and heard of the great and holy kintu'on!" Lord Nanda shouted loudly.
The two horses from the Golden Herd reared up and shouted, "We will stand by the honor of the great kintu'ons!" They slammed their feet down.
The Garudas took to the air. "We also testify to the existence of the pious and holy kintu'on! This is the exact reason why they have turned their backs on your kingdom and kind save the repentant of the eastern kingdoms!" they screeched angrily.
Prince Eric jumped forward and got in between raising his wings. "Wait! Calm down! There's no reason for this to escalate!"
He then felt something soft tapping the top of his head. He turned and saw Feiyu next to him, patting the top of his head with his tail.
"He says, "Sweet infant. I will allow no violence. Do not be afraid."
"I'm not an infant. I'm thirty-six!"
Feiyu curled up like a shrimp for a bit, then unrolled and patted his head again.
"He laughs at you and called you a silly infant again," Pixiu said, chuckling.
"How old is Lord Feiyu?" he asked.
Feiyu flattened out with upturned edges, then puffed back up and returned to the front, twisting all the way.
"He shrugs and says he stopped counting after 300 thousand years. He'll need to check his records, but he doesn't think he's hit 500 thousand yet."
Prince Eric's jaw was on the floor.
Feiyu curled up again. Then he split himself like a mouth, dropped the lower hinge to the floor and lifted it repeatedly.
"That's ridiculous!" Lord Fire Whirl said. "Equus is nowhere near that old!"
"Earth is 4.7 BILLION years old," Vegeta said, "and that's pretty young compared to some life bearing worlds."
Lord Fire Whirl pressed his lips together.
"You know I could run a rice cooker off of all the steam coming out of your ears right now."
Pixiu's eyes widened and he clasped his paw over his mouth. Luna did no better hiding her chuckle.
"Vegeta, sarcasm," Celestia scolded.
"Yes, ma'am…" Vegeta said, rocking his head back and forth.
This got more chuckles from the room. Which silenced the moment he stood up.
Vegeta walked over to Prince Eric. "You've been quite talkative, young man." Vegeta lifted his arm, "Why don't you head up front somewhere for the rest of the meeting and if you would like, maybe set up a private meeting when I'm not in a full body cast."
"Oh, thank you. Thank you very much."
Vegeta put his hand to the side of his mouth, "Hey! Babysitter 1 and 2! Come up here too. Find a spot." He then extended his arm again and waved them up.
Olov and Eetu glanced at each other, then walked up.
Irmhild locked eyes and glared at Olov. He was not happy.
Olov nodded slightly.
"Nice job drawing attention to yourself," he scolded arriving.
"But you said more insults like that could—"
"I did. And now you've drawn the attention to not just yourself, but put your kingdom in the middle of this feud and not given any room for neutrality to your parents without damaging your reputation." He lightly shoved him. "Go find a spot and keep your beak shut the rest of the time here."
"Sorry kid. Technically he's right about that." Vegeta smiled, "But thank you. I like your enthusiasm." He returned to his seat. "So, the black powder?"
They all nodded. A quick chat and Pixiu picked up.
"Black powder has many uses, and like Buddhism and ki, it came through the mirror. It came in the form of toys and fireworks, but its use as a weapon takes little imagination after seeing what can happen to a body without the care and respect needed when dealing with higher amounts of the powder. As was said, our word for this weapon is huo qiang." He looked at Ferghana.
"Our word for it is chong. And we are aware The Golden Herd's word for it is gonne."
"Our word is coeng," Kongque said. "We are also aware that the Garuda's word is sung."
"Our word is also chong," Gyeongjuma said.
"And ours is Ju," Kouma said.
"Will the Garudas and Golden Herd representatives confirm this?" Celestia asked.
"Yes," said one of the Garudas. "We also know through our trade networks that sungs are used in Ashtavinayaka, Saddle Arabia, and Feligypt."
"We use gonne as well," one of the Herd's horses said. "Every tribe we ruled over at our greatest and every tribe we battled against but failed have taken and used these against us. Including Muskovy, Ottomanes, Saddle Arabia, Ashtavinayaka, and especially the Griffon Empire. They took our simple gonnes and created more powerful ones and drove us back. Then gave them to the tribes and provoked them to rebel. Everything that has happened in the western provinces these past 150 years is solely the empire's doing!"
"That is ridiculous! We have no idea what these horses are neighing on about!" Ermendrud shouted.
"Same!" the Feligypt ambassador said. "We have no idea what this is about."
"Saddle Arabia would like to express neutrality in this conflict," Prince Rasheed said. "We confirm or deny nothing."
"We also express neutrality," Lord Nanda said.
"We also express ours," Muskovy said.
"Lapland expresses our neutrality," Eetu said.
"As does Gotaland," Olov said. He then jabbed Prince Eric so hard in the ribs he was knocked sideways.
"Norway and Jutland express neutrality," he blurted out.
"Princess Celestia!" Duke Poppycock shouted. "This meeting is about the dark mage, not spinning wild stories concerning Lady Pinkie Pie's attempted murder by Bocce Boules in the middle of the street in front of nearly a hundred testifying witnesses!"
"If one hundred ponies were dumb enough to lie, then any pony involved with fabrication of evidence will be executed without hesitation," Celestia glared at Duke Poppycock, "as according to the law."
"Princesses," Judge Blackstone spoke up. "It is impossible for a pony to lie under enhanced interrogation. Are you suggesting otherwise?! That invalidates the very core of our laws and justice system!"
"When done correctly, yes. But as I said, any pony fabricating evidence will be dealt with."
"You're basically accusing this entire justice system of corruption on an unprecedented scale," Duke Poppycock shouted. "What is more believable, tens of thousands of police, guards, prosecutors, and judges conspiring together or YOU trying to save a pony the royals have clear ties with?! This is tyranny! Something to be expected from Nightmare Moon or King Sombra — Or a DARK MAGE whispering in the Sun Princess' ear!"
"While the magic council takes no sides in politics," Lord Fire Whirl said. "This meeting is solely about the dark mage. Let's return to it."
"Lord Fire Whirl and children of the council," Judge Blackstone spoke up. "You are all the best mages in the land. Surely you will debunk the possibility of lying under spell?"
One of the children spoke up, "I am Marquess Candle Douter of House Pyro, son of Lord Fire Whirl, for those who do not know me. I've trained many law enforcement officers in spellcraft. While what the judge said is technically true, the major caveat is done correctly. There have been court cases where errors occurred because of botched interrogations. In fact, I just returned from Trottingham for consulting on such a case. But these are easily noticeable by medical staff because of sudden changes of behavior of the witnesses in question. As this case is only a day old, it is just too early to tell. While corruption on such a wide scale as the princess described is impossible, a poor technique over multiple witnesses can swing a case. This should be looked at, if only to clear the officers in question and preserve their good reputations."
Judge Blackstone looked frustrated that he left the door open to the spell failing even if he shot down the conspiracy.
"Before we pivot," Luna said. "We have one more speaker. Someone intimately familiar with the weapons used against Lady Pinkie Pie. A former unteroffizier trained in the heart of the Holy Gryphon Empire, the highest rank a non-noble can rise in their military. A war hero with many medals, including a black cross."
As Luna spoke, Celestia went to the dais' side room and entered.
She found Mido in uniform, limbs intact, his coat folded to the side and the helmet on top. He was kneeling on a rug, constantly pressing his forehead to the ground before sitting up again.
"Mido, we are ready for you," she said sweetly.
"And Prince Vegeta is there waiting?"
"Yes, he has not disconnected. He is ready to support you."
Mido did one more cycle before standing up. He walked over and put on his helmet.
"Then let's save that kitten."