Ferris sat hugging his knees, submerged in warm water, as he reflected upon the abuse he'd just experienced. And there really was no more charitable description for the brutish acts of violence that Natsuki Subaru had inflicted upon him. While Ferris understood that he had gone too far with his teasing and somewhat deserved the first punch and possibly even the second, everything after that had been Subaru taking advantage of the situation to bully someone who was physically much weaker than him.
Ferri could have stopped it at any time...
Subaru naturally had no way of knowing that Ferris' ability to manipulate mana could also be used offensively. The same technique that enabled him to control internal mana flows to heal could just as easily direct those flows in order to immobilize, harm, and even kill. Ferris, however, was reluctant to weaponize skills that had been acquired for the sole purpose of helping others. It was an affront to his pride as a healer who valued life above all else. At the very least, Ferris could not justify going against his ethos just to spare himself some pain. Admittedly an agonizing, traumatizing amount of pain, but just pain nonetheless.
The other reason for not stopping Subaru's assault had to do with the motivation behind it. Or, rather, lack thereof. While true that Ferris was the one who had set Subaru off, he had already been in a state of pure rage long before that didn't seem to be directed at anyone in particular.
Either that or it was hatred towards everyone and everything in the world…
The thought made Ferris shudder. He'd dismissed Subaru as just a braggadocious weakling who wasn't actually capable of anything. But now it was clear that the boy had the capacity for violence and cruelty, given the opportunity. So if Subaru truly loathed the world itself, the only thing lacking would be the means with which to enact his will.
And if Rem is to be believed, Subawu can achieve anything if he really puts his mind to it…
Also according to Rem, Subaru had been unusually aggressive even prior to the pair's argument. She had also mentioned Subaru telling her that she was the only thing worth saving in the entire 'pile of shit Kingdom'. Maybe not hatred for the entire world but almost certainly for the entirety of Lugunica. Ferris hadn't thought much of it until he saw the fire in Subaru's eyes as he delivered devastating blows one after the other. It was only then that Ferris understood that he should not stop Subaru, under any circumstances, until his rage had been completely exhausted. Any interruptions to the beatdown would have just meant Subaru keeping the remainder of that anger bottled up inside him until it exploded again and harmed another unsuspecting victim instead. One that wouldn't be able to shrug off their wounds like Ferris could.
So Ferris couldn't even bring himself to regret making Subaru lose his temper. If it was inevitable anyway, best that the one to incur Subaru's wrath be someone able to withstand it. In hindsight, however, Ferris wasn't so sure that bringing up Subaru's argument with Rem had been the right call. After all, Rem had bared her soul to Ferris with the understanding that he would keep the conversation a secret.
Ferris had fully intended to do so but the look of total misery on Rem's face when she'd described the incident just wouldn't allow him to do nothing. So he'd confronted Subaru about it in the hopes that the boy would see reason and apologize to Rem for his deplorable behavior. He hadn't expected such an aggressive response.
Nyobody can find out about this. Lady Crusch could start a war with the Emilia Camp over it!
With that thought, Ferris finished scrubbing off the last of the bloodstains on his body and got out of the bath. He then put on some clean clothes and disposed of those he'd worn during the assault.
Nyow all evidence is gone. Just nyeed to find a way to clean up Subawu's bedroom before Lady Crusch or Old Man Wil see it…
It was a rather strange situation, having the victim of violent abuse be the one to go out of their way in order to cover it up. Despite that, it was quite in line with Ferris' principles. He knew well that failing to hide what had happened would inevitably lead to more violence and possibly even to deaths. As much as he resented the way he'd been treated, Ferris didn't believe that Subaru deserved to lose his life over it.
Ferris composed himself as he went to see Lady Crusch who had just concluded another meeting in preparation for the planned campaign to eliminate the White Whale. In order to make sure that she didn't suspect a thing—
"Laaaaady Cruuuuuusch, meow! Ferri is so glad Ferri finally has mew allll to himself, meow!"
—He was determined to act as he always did.
"I too am glad to see you, Ferris." Lady Crusch responded with a subtle smile dancing on her lips.
"Shall we go out to the balcony and enjoy some wine together this fine evening, My Lady?" Ferris bowed in a gentlemanly manner rather unfitting for his effeminate voice and appearance.
"Yes, of course. But first I would like us to discuss a number of important topics. Naturally, I wish to do so with complete sobriety. Are there any urgent matters that you believe I should be notified about, Ferris?"
Everything is nyormal… Nyothing to worry about…
"Nyot that Ferri can think of. The carriage purchases are all going smoothly. Old Man Wil does seem a little restless though, meow. Ferri thinks Old Man Wil is excited about the chance to kill the White Whale."
"Hmmm, I believe that is rather understandable considering his history with that particular Witchbeast." Lady Crusch nodded slowly. "Wilhelm's zeal with regards to slaying the White Whale may indeed prove invaluable to us in achieving that very goal. We are already blessed with fortune to have the Sword Demon on our side for such a dangerous quest."
"It's all thanks to mew, Lady Crusch!"
"Yes, I suppose there may be some accuracy to that statement…" Lady Crusch humbly accepted the praise. "And what of your patient, Ferris? Is the rate of progress as you predicted?"
"More or less, meow."
"That is good to hear. Despite their spat, I am certain that Lady Emilia would be pleased to know that Natsuki Subaru's Gate is on its way towards repair. Very well then, Ferris. I will continue to entrust his recovery to you. I trust that regular visits to heal Natsuki Subaru will not be too much of an inconvenience for you?"
"Of course nyot! Ferri would be happ—" Ferris began but his voice suddenly failed him. To say that he would be 'happy' to fulfil Lady Crusch's request would be to lie directly to her face.
Upon thinking of having to interact with Subaru again, memories of the merciless onslaught came flooding unbidden into Ferris' head. The trauma of every single blow. The assailant's cruel smile as he delivered punishment upon his helpless victim. The fear that it would never end.
What if he does it again?! What if he attacks Ferri just like that again?!
Ferris could not keep the anxiety from seizing his body. He shook and shivered. His cat ears and tail stood up rigidly in fright. He hugged himself tightly. Water welled up in his eyes.
"Ferris…? Is something the matter?" Concern was creeping into Lady Crusch's face. She reached out to place a reassuring hand on his shoulder. Instinctively, Ferris moved out of reach and put up a hand to protect himself from harm. Realizing what he was doing, he quickly put the hand down and went back towards Lady Crusch.
"N-n-nyo! Nyo, Lady Crusch! Ferri is fine! Ferri is always fine! Nyo nyeed to worry about Ferri!" Ferris couldn't stop himself from yelling as he tried desperately to deny that anything was amiss.
Ferri can't let Lady Crusch find out!
If the plan was to act as casually as possible in order to remove suspicion, Ferris was failing miserably at it. In fact, the dissonance between his body language and the message he was trying to convey made it plainly obvious that something was seriously wrong.
"Ferris, I'm afraid I can't help but notice the rather sudden change in your demeanor from the moment I asked that you continue with frequent visitations to check on Natsuki Subaru's condition." Lady Crusch's eyes narrowed. "Correct me if I am wrong but it does truly appear as if you are afraid of him. For that reason, I simply must ask whether Natsuki Subaru did anything to you…"
"Heh! Heh heh!" Ferris laughed nervously, trying to play off the whole situation as a funny misunderstanding. "Wha-wha-what?! To Ferri?! S-Subawu would nyever! He's too w-w-w-weak, m-meow!"
The more he tried to cover up what had happened, the more unnatural Ferris appeared. At this rate, Lady Crusch wouldn't even need to rely on her Divine Protection in order to surmise that something was being kept from her. Sure enough —
"Ferris… What did Natsuki Subaru do to you?" Her voice was filled with an icy fury.
It was now a question of what, not if.
"Nyothing! Nyothing at all!" Ferris yelled, his voice at an even higher pitch than usual.
"FERRIS!" Lady Crusch raising her voice was rare and her shouting was even rarer. It went to show just how furious she was. "I would advise that you not force me to check for winds of untruth coming from your direction as I would consider it a sign that I can no longer trust you… Make no mistake, this would mean a significant and irreversible change in our relationship. I assume you are only too aware of what the implications for such a thing would be for your status as my sworn knight…"
Ferris shifted uncomfortably under that frosty gaze.
"And now that I have made the stakes clear, I hope you understand that I am no longer asking and that I shall not permit any further chances. You will tell me what Natsuki Subaru did to you. That is an order."
"It… It was all Ferri's fault… Ferri went way too far with teasing Subawu! Ferri deserved it! Ferri… deserved… at least some of it…"
Ferris clamped one hand over his mouth as he broke down into a sobbing fit. He hadn't really thought of it at the time… no, he had likely just been suppressing it. The truth was that his treatment by Subaru had seriously hurt him, and far more emotionally than physically.
Being treated like trash… Being abused with violence… It took Ferris back to a time in his life that he was loath to remember. Back to before he met Lady Crusch. When he was still the shame of his entire family and especially the target of constant contempt and abuse from one Biehn Argyle. Or 'Father' as a young Ferris might have once called him before being locked away in the darkness… Having been reminded of that terrible, cruel man made Ferris want nothing to do with Subaru any longer. And just the thought of having to continue taking care of him was making Ferris sick to his stomach. He retched as he cried.
Lady Crusch looked at this spectacle with worry in her eyes, her anger towards the victimizer giving way to empathy and soothing affection for the victim. She held Ferris' hand and rested his head against her chest, a seemingly stark inversion of their respective roles as Noblewoman and Knight. Finally, Ferris had somewhat calmed down so Lady Crusch decided to pursue the subject again, albeit delicately.
"Ferris…" She spoke softly, gently stroking her precious friend's hair to keep him as relaxed as possible. "About what Nats— About what our guest did to you…" She bit her lip in an uncharacteristic display of nervousness. "Did he… Have you been…" Ferris could feel Lady Crusch's heart pounding violently as she struggled to find the right word while also trying to maintain her composure. "…Defiled?"
It took Ferris a moment to figure out what he had just been asked. Then the realization dawned on him.
Ferri should have just said what it was from the start! Nyow Lady Crusch is thinking Subawu did all sorts of unspeakable things to Ferri!
As awful as the brutality against him had been, the implied crime was several orders of magnitude worse. Ferris was convinced that even at his lowest point, Subaru wouldn't ever be capable of committing that kind of heinous act. At least, he hoped so. And yet… Subaru had still done whatever he wanted to Ferris' body, explicitly against Ferris' wishes, and for his own pleasure, even if not the carnal kind. Could Ferris honestly say with full confidence that he hadn't, in some way, been violated?
The tears began to flow again, no doubt confirming Lady Crusch's suspicions.
"Unforgivable." Never before had Lady Crusch's voice contained so much venom. Ferris heard the distinct sound of Lion Rampant being drawn and panicked.
"Wait! Wait! He didn't! He didn't! Ferri wasn't!" Ferris frantically waved his hands to dismiss the terrible allegations. "N-nyot to worry! Ferri is still a p-p-pure and unblemished maiden, heh heh!" He made a joke to lighten the mood ever so slightly but Lady Crusch didn't particularly appreciate the inappropriate moment of attempted levity. Even so, she sheathed her blade.
"If not that… Then what?"
"Subawu hi—" Ferris hesitated, opting to use more passive language to downplay the incident as much as possible. "Ferri was hit." He could still see a murderous glint in his Lady's eyes. "Ferri said some things that were way too nyasty! It's Ferri's fault! So Ferri forgives Subawu completely! Please, Lady Crusch, just forget about it."
"Ferris…" Lady Crusch's hand was still gripping the hilt of her sword. "You are telling me that Natsuki Subaru, while a guest under my roof and a patient in your care, committed acts of physical violence against you and terrified you to the point that the mere thought of being in his presence again is enough to cause you physical discomfort… Yet you wish me to simply pretend as if nothing took place? To, without a single word of reproach, continue hosting the violent ingrate who dared to lay a hand on my loyal knight?"
"…"
"I regret to inform you that I cannot respect that wish. Not only is it an insult to our longstanding friendship and your years of diligent service, it would also call into question my ability to rule this Kingdom. Evil deeds must not go unpunished, lest they encourage more of the same. Today, I am expected to pardon Natsuki Subaru. And tomorrow? Shall I also show undue mercy to murderers and rapists? No, Ferris, this is a matter of principle. Regardless of what you may have said to him, Natsuki Subaru responding with his fists is an unjustifiable act of barbarism. He must be dealt with accordingly."
Lady Crusch stood up from her seat as she prepared to confront Subaru, no doubt to interrogate him and hear his version of events. Though Ferris knew that if she saw all the bloodstains in the bedroom, she would understand just how extreme the assault had been and would likely kill Subaru before he could say a single word in his defense.
This is bad. This is really really bad!
"Wait!" Ferris yelled, prompting Lady Crusch to look back at him in surprise. "Please wait, Lady Crusch. Ferri understands that something nyeeds to be done. But… do we really have to use more violence to solve this? With the White Whale Hunt approaching, can we really afford to get into a war with the Emilia Camp right nyow?"
"I suppose you make a cogent point, Ferris…" Reluctantly, Lady Crusch sat back down and crossed one leg over the other, leaning forward to listen intently. "Very well then. What is your proposed alternative?"
Ferris gulped nervously as he proceeded to explain the details of his compromise.