It was stupid
It was ridiculous
And if Mikey had hair, it would've been gone thanks to his older brothers stunts. In fact, if they were human, Leo and Raph would've already killed each other.
Donnie was no stranger to noise, even if he happened to always hate when it got to loud. But he also was no stranger to fighting, both in the home, and outside in the world. As a ninja, it was common to fight against the criminals littering New York.
But in the home…it felt unnatural
Everything in life has a structure, has a way of doing things quite efficiently. It was how God made the earth to be, still while providing a rather chaotic element. As a scientist himself, Donnie knew all about structure.
Fighting in the home was not structured
Nor was it necessary
Usually, he didn't mind it as much, as it was easy to ignore with noise canceling headphones. But in the middle of almost getting squished by spikes, fire shooting out in hopes it might hit someone, and two older brothers – who are supposed to be the leaders – fighting. It felt excessive.
It felt exactly like chaos
Which he supposed was the intended effect of the maze. But his older two brothers biting each other's heads off was not going to get them any further than this.
Also…there was the Mikey's head lighting on fire issue
If the youngest had happened to have a head full of hair, it would've been gone. Burned to ashes. Zinc.
That was one reason alone that made Donnie explode at his brother's that night, of course after wrapping Mikey's poor burnt head. The youngest had luckily been a good sport about it all. Though Donnie was not, he was beyond fed up.
"Look at you two! Fighting in the middle of a battle?" Donnie yelled. "Thanks to you, our little brother's head was lit on fire. ON FIRE! AND WHAT DID YOU DO? You still argued!"
Leo reached forward. "Don…"
"No! I don't want to hear it, not now at least. But mark my words, if you're fighting hurts our little brother again, I swear I'll never talk to you for weeks. Even years."
Leo nor Raph commented, even they could sense the tearful concern lacing Donnie's tone. They hadn't meant it, hadn't meant to hurt Mikey. It just happened. But it wasn't going to again.
They were going to be better
And for a while, it did. Donnie's lecture had scared them enough, plus, the youngest was more than willing to forgive his older brothers. His head did heal, as did Donnie's rage. Pretty soon, it was back to a clean slate.
That was until the Krang battle
Mikey, and Donnie were forced to watch Raph, their brother in arms, fight against their leader. It was heartbreaking, even more than to hear it as well. Leo pleaded – as one usually does – and Raph gave his best grunt.
At best
It was nothing more
All too soon did the arguing start, so many years of rebuilding crumbing down. They never knew Raph was truly hurting until now. How much he was really keeping in. How much he felt hurt, but truly didn't know how to express such thoughts.
What could they do?
Donnie watched Leo get punched, slapped, kneed. It reminded him of the all too familiar tears that ran down his cheeks when they fought, how his arms – even though he wasn't touching the youngest – could still see and hear the words that Mikey would speak to calm him down. Vaguely he could still smell the atmosphere of his lab, hear the machines beeping a wistful tune in the background. And lastly, taste the salty aftermath of what came to a fight – that was no good he might add – that was not truly resolved.
Maybe this pain that his older brother was feeling might not ever go away
Maybe…they were a little more broken than they thought
Mikey watched Raph, saw the way his muscles tensed. Even through the very thing possessing him, the youngest could see the still form of his older brother. If only truly, he could be free. Go up and hug, kiss his brother on the top of his head. But this was Leo's battle, that was clear.
This was not something he could fix on his own
Then the battle was resolved, though the pain was not.
Donnie and Raph watched their youngest brother open the portal, watched him almost tear himself apart. They felt themselves get back up, place their hands on his and offer every ounce of strength, silently hoping by some miracle, it was enough.
In an odd form, it almost was
Their eldest brother – Donnie would've called him stupid – was retrieved . But not without any fault, there was still much ground to cover. Naturally the brothers were tearful up until the moment that the van pulled up. Bringing everyone into one giant circle of crippling anxiety.
Raph's eye was damaged beyond repair
Donnie's shell was aching with every passing building
Mikey was passed out, the scientist worried about that part greatly
And Leo…Leo was breathing. That's all that really and truly mattered in that moment. His injuries could be fixed, even his mental sanity could somehow – Docter Feelings might be needed – be mended back to its happy state.
But that wasn't even the most scariest part
And it didn't even have to do with Leo
It was what came before and after. Who they were, and who they were meant to be. What came next, and how their future was altered. Maybe nothing would be the same, but then again, maybe it would go back to how it was before. Donnie wanted and didn't want that at the same time.
They had grown over the war, even if it was small compared to what his older self had to go through. It was apparent through all of them, even the scientist himself. He tried to hide it, but everyone could easily see through his facade.
So…what came next?
First off was making sure that his eldest brother survived the night, same with Mikey. Who was struggling to breathe. It was a busy time, Raph and Donnie both moving from each side of the room to help the two injured brothers.
Not that they weren't injured themselves
But that was a later issue
Donnie supplied a greedy amount of oxygen to the youngest, then proceeded to wrap every inch of his older brothers body. It was truly frightening to see all the cuts he knew would never close. To see how many scars would leave a lasting impact on Leo.
He wished he could've stopped it
But how? He was really only one turtle
Who was supposed to have all the answers, which was none at the moment. Raph looked at Donnie as he finished the results, his eyebrows creased in only a way that was reserved for his dear brothers.
Donnie sighed. "They'll both make it through the night, but we need to watch them. For Leo, any sign of a heart attack, and that all his bones are setting correctly. For Mikey, his oxygen levels. I'm concerned on how low they are."
And that's how it went. Donnie and Raph watching both of their brothers all night, occasionally switching. At one point, Leo stirred, opened his tender eyes a little crack. But all too soon did they close, maybe never to reopen.
Mikey didn't move an inch, and his wheezing became constant
Even on oxygen, the youngest was clearly spent
There was little that Donnie could do on the matter, it was almost painful to acknowledge. At least with Leo, he could help him heal faster. That's what he decided to focus on.
At one point in the night, Donnie looked over to see Raph snuggled up next to Mikey. Of whom looked to be stuck in a blissful sleep. Then he glanced at Leo, cuddling up next to him. It felt good to feel his older brothers hands, feel his arms. Know that against all the odds, Leo was still here and breathing.
That no matter what, Donnie could conquer this crippling fear of failing
Because he hadn't failed…yet
-0-
Mikey felt the light before he saw it
He knew what it meant, knew what it implied. For years, the youngest knew nothing but light, and only rarely saw the darkness. Not in himself, but in those he often felt sorry for. It was something that felt foreign, and sometimes, for good reason.
It was more trademarked than anything
Mikey only saw the sun, not the moon. Only saw one part of life that was full of life, joy. But never the other part. He only saw it once, on a moonlit night. It had been one of those patrol's, one of those arguments that brewed over.
He left
Usually, his brothers would pound him into the ground for doing such tactics, but they didn't care. Raph and Leo were to busy yelling in each other's faces. It was then that the youngest made his rushed escape.
To the park was where he went, then to a bench sitting nearby. It was there that he saw it, felt it, embraced it. There was no life in that timeline, nothing that would've been considered normal. Instead, Mikey saw nothing but sleeping birds, swaying trees, didn't see but heard crickets cricking in the moonlit night.
At first, it was nothing but weird. At first, he was waiting to see that one person walk by. But nobody came, only a few rabbits that quickly retreated away to a home that he didn't know.
He was no stranger to nighttime, as it was the only real time for freedom. But the other part of life wasn't like that. There was no bad guys to ruin their thunder, no people getting hurt because of some unfortunate circumstance. And it was just him…in a place with no space nor time.
It wasn't darkness, at least not in the way that he's seen it
But a dimmed sun
In a forgotten world
But then came war, then came absolutely everything in hell. Leo got hurt, Donnie and Raph as well. Mikey guessed he wasn't in the best of shape. This was not one of those moments of light.
This was a suffocating darkness
Then came the light, almost immediately. Mikey felt it, then he saw it. A light so bright that it would've made all the sun's jealous. A light so bright that his heart warmed, and for a tiny second, it was just him. No war, no injured brothers, no crippling anxiety about life, about war, about practically anything in the world.
It was just him…and the light
'Who are you?" It asked.
Mikey tilted his head, then blinked. "I…I'm Michealangelo."
The light flicked. "No silly, who are you?"
"I'm a turtle."
"Deeper little one."
"I'm…I'm….someone?"
"That's correct, but who are you truly?"
Mikey looked down at his chest, then at his beating heart. Who was he? A light beyond worlds, maybe. A treasured soul of many people, that was a little closer. A turtle whose heart was bigger than the whole planet, physically no, but maybe more mentally.
He was Michealangelo, an artist, a brother, and someone whose heart was bigger than the whole planet.
The light flicked again, this time dimming. Mikey grabbed the light, holding on to its deep rays. He couldn't lose it, not now. Not ever, it felt like.
"Don't go," he cried out. "I need you!"
"I'm always here little one; I need you more than you need me."
Then it flew into his chest, creating a tranquility of sense, peace, anything that felt comforting. For a second, Mikey felt alright in this view. Felt as if he could go forever, fly into the clouds above.
But all too soon did he fall back into his body, pain almost immediately replacing that earned sense of comfort. Fatigue grabbed at his bones, his face, and his mind. He heard his brothers speaking, felt the oxygen run up into his nose, then into his throat.
He felt the light
He couldn't see it, not now at least
But it was there, in all its deepest beauty. And it was telling him to sleep the day away, to finally replace that fear with something more stable. Love and happiness.
His brothers
That's who he really wanted
Opening his eyes – with some effort he might add – Mikey felt Raph's arms around him. It was comforting, bringing him back down to earth in a way that only he could.
Raph had been suffering, still was. But Mikey hoped that he could help ease that burden, help share that light that had helped him.
-0-
Donnie waited and waited. He looked at his watch, did some experiments, and finally found a useful outlet for his time. But then all too soon did he go back to waiting.
Waiting for Leo
And for Mikey
In full honestly, he was waiting for many things. Leo was recovering with a slight incline, which was very good news. Mikey was…he was there. His oxygen levels didn't decline but they didn't improve either. As said before, there was little that Donnie could do on that matter.
So, he waited
Donnie guessed Raph did as well
It was three days in when Donnie had his first conversation with Leo, who was on painkillers but – by some miracle – coherent enough.
Well…enough was a bit much
"Dude…he had longggggg arms and they were pink. PINK! Can you believe that Don?" Leo giggled. "And a long tongue, he almost ate me. ATE ME!"
Donnie attached an IV. "Was this a dream Nardo?"
"Don't know, can't really recall."
That's practically how the rest of the conversation went, back and forth. Nonsense upon nonsense. It wasn't necessarily a conversation that he wanted to have, but at least Leo was talking. Even if it didn't make sense in any way.
At least it was a start