Xander didn't know how his life had come to this. He thought he had it pretty well figured out by now. He knew his grades were of the lousy, dooming him to a life of either minimum wage or appliance repair. He also knew that he was hopelessly in love with Buffy Summers – something he also knew was hopeless in and of itself, what with her only seeing him as a very good friend while she made eyes at a vampire. He also knew his role in the group was to try and keep everyone's spirits up with his patented brand of lame Xander jokes.

He also knew he didn't like Cordelia Chase. He didn't like her at all – she was abrasive, snobbish and rude. And it wasn't like he hadn't tried. He'd given her several chances to be likable, and she spurred him every time. She was a nasty old barracuda in nice clothes.

So how had he wound up in a closet sucking face with her? They'd been doing this for weeks now. They'd see each other, hurl vicious insults, and then they'd find an empty closet to make out in. It really defied all logic. Still, he thought, at least the dramatic music he'd hear in his head whenever they'd start didn't play anymore – he still wasn't sure if he imagined that or not.

"Xander?" she said between kisses.

"Shhh-sh-sh," he replied.

"It's just that…" pause to kiss, "I'm worried we're gonna miss class." Kiss, kiss, kiss.

Annoyed, he reached up for the light string and yanked it to turn it on. Now able to see her beautifully agitated face, he calmed his hormones a little, taking a step back. "You know what? This would work a lot better for me if you didn't talk."

"Well, it'd work a lot better for me with the lights off," she replied, grabbing the string and yanking them back into darkness.

She put her arms around him again and started to kiss him, but Xander didn't kiss back, his indignation too powerful. He yanked the string again and the light returned. "Are you saying that you can't look at me when we do… whatever it is we do?"

She looked back snottily. "No, it's not that I can't, it's just more… I don't want to."

His tiny modicum of self-respect flared furiously. "That's great! That's just dandy! We're repulsed by each other, we hide from our friends…!"

"Well, I should hope so! Please!"

"All in all, this is not what I'd call a big self-esteem booster."

"Tell me about it!" she sneered, looking him up and down. "Just look at you! And those clothes. Where did you get those shoes?!"

His attraction wilting like a frostbitten flower, Xander stepped away from her. "Okay, you know what? I don't need this."

"Ditto! Like a hole in the head!"

They both reached for the doorknob, and their hands met there. They hesitated a moment, and then wrapped their arms around each other again and kissed even more passionately. Dammit, Xander thought as they slowly sank to the floor and he gave the light string a good yank, where is that music coming from?!

The word 'SEX' loomed over the students in Mr Whitmore's Teen Health class. He looked very uncomfortable trying to educate children about sex while also trying not to look very uncomfortable, which only made him come off as even more uncomfortable. "S-E-X. Sex," he said, facing the class. "The sex drive in the human animal is intense. How many of us have lost countless productive hours plagued by unwanted sexual thoughts and feelings?"

Xander immediately raised his hand and nodded. "Yes! Mm-hm."

Mr Whitmore looked very patient. "That was a rhetorical question, Mr. Harris, not a poll."

Several students giggled as Xander lowered his embarrassed hand. He saw Cordelia look away from him and stare down at her book. For once, he couldn't blame her. Even in his peripheral vision, he could see Jesse and Willow also looking awkward on his behalf.

Mr Whitmore continued. "Of course, for teenagers such as yourselves these feelings are even more overwhelming. With all sorts of hormones surging through your bodies, compelling you to action, it's often difficult to remember that there are negative consequences to, uh, having sex. Would anyone care to offer one such consequence?"

Cordelia raised her hand, and Mr Whitmore gave her the floor. "Well, that depends. Are you talking about sex in the car or out of the car?" When he looked confused, she continued. "Because I have a friend, not me, that was in a Miata at, parked at the top of the hill, and then she kicked the gearshift, and, and…"

Mr Whitmore quickly interrupted. "Yeah, I, I was thinking of something a little more commonplace, Ms. Chase."

Feeling combative, Xander raised his hand, and Mr Whitmore indicated to him. "You wanna talk 'negative consequence'? What about the heartbreak of halitosis?" He glared at Cordelia just as she glared back. "I mean, a girl may seem spiffy, but if she ignores her flossing, the bloom is definitely off the rose."

Cordelia immediately raised her hand again. Sighing reluctantly, Mr Whitmore gave her permission to speak again. "Like that compares to kissing a guy who thinks the Hoover technique is a big turn-on."

"What about having to feign interest in her vapid little chit-chat just so you can get some touch? 'Boot cut jeans, pro or con?' Can you say - get a life!?" He turned to implore the teacher, but then, both he and she realized they were in the spotlight as all their classmates snickered and whispered to each other. Even Willow and Jesse were looking at them in bewilderment.

Satisfied that the back-and-forth had subsided, Mr Whitmore tried to resume the lesson. "Now. Another consequence of sexual activity? Anyone?" Cordelia raises her hand again. "Uh, else?"

Much to everyone's relief, Willow raised her hand. He indicated that she should speak. "How about pregnancy? That would be a major one, right?"

"Thank you, Ms. Rosenberg!" he said gratefully, allowing her to smile smugly. "Among teens, unwanted pregnancy is the number one negative consequence of sexual activity. So, as discussed last week, I present you with…" He paused to take a sheet off of two trays of eggs. "… your offspring. You will split into parenting teams. You and your partner will share equally in the daily task of raising your egg." He picked up one of the trays to distribute. "Now, please choose a partner and come pick up your children."

Dimly aware that Willow waved at him, Xander decided to ignore her and try walking over to Cordelia. Maybe if he apologized discretely enough, she'd agree to partner with him. Sadly, forgiveness was not forthcoming as she saw him coming and immediately grabbed the shirtsleeve of the boy sitting across from her to get his attention. "You wanna have a baby?" she asked him brightly.

Disappointed, his attention wandered to another girl walking up to the second tray of eggs still on the teacher's desk and approached her. "Hey," he said as charmingly as he could. "I know we just met, but isn't that Xander Jr. you're holding?" The girl giggled and smiled. Score. As he made to follow her, he took one last glance in Cordelia's direction before grabbing a notebook.

Buffy walked over to the library's card catalog, pulling out a drawer and going through the cards. She'd had a rotten night – she'd been at the mall with her mother, but she'd had to break away during an errand to save a girl from a cowboy-looking vampire. Her mother had not been pleased at the delay, not to mention that she'd actually forgotten to run the errand she'd been sent on. It was tough saving people's lives in secret.

While Giles helped her research in the cage behind her, she heard the door open, and she glanced up to see Xander, Jesse and Willow walk in. "Buffy!" Willow said brightly. "How come you weren't in class?"

"Vampire issues. Did Mr Whitmore notice I was tardy?"

Xander gave her a playfully stern look. "I think the word you're searching for is 'absent'."

Willow nodded in agreement. "Tardy people show."

"And, yes, he did notice," said Jesse, "so I present you with this." He held out an egg to her.

Buffy took it and rolled it around in her hands. "As far as punishments go this is fairly abstract."

"Not 'punishment'. 'Assignment'."

"Okay, I get it even less."

"Well, you know, it's the whole 'sex leads to responsibility' thing, which I personally don't get," Xander elaborated. "You gotta take care of the egg. It's a baby. You gotta keep it safe and teach it Christian values."

"My egg is Jewish," Willow said firmly.

"Then teach it that Dreidel song."

Buffy felt the cold stab of dread in her gut. "I can't do this! I can't take care of things! I killed my Giga Pet. Literally, I sat on it and it broke." She set the egg down on top of the catalog with a sad moan and quickly walked over to a book reshelving cart. Jesse quickly picked it up again, looking somewhat alarmed.

"You'll do fine!" Willow tried to assure her.

"Yeah, the only thing that stresses me is when do we tell them that they're adopted?" Xander said sadly.

Buffy shook her head. "I'll just lay that one off on my partner."

"Oh, thanks, pal," Jesse replied.

Surprised, Buffy looked at him again as he held the egg with a mildly irritated expression. "Wait…," she said slowly. "You're…?"

"Oop – she's getting there folks. Just hold on," said Xander like a game show host.

Jesse shrugged. "You not being there put us at an uneven number, and everyone paired off before me. Imagine what a fool I felt, standing there all alone with an egg needing a bedtime story."

"So… we're partners?" Buffy asked.

Jesse held up the egg with a wry smile. "This here's our baby."

Feeling a little better about this whole thing, she took it and smiled back. "What are we calling it?"

"How about 'Eggbert' if it's a boy, or 'Shelly' if it's a girl?"

"You don't wanna call it 'Jesse Jr'? We could call it 'JJ' for short."

"Success!" They all jumped at Giles' voice as he came out of the cage with a book. "At last. Your playmate is a fellow of repute, it seems." He set down the book on the counter and pointed out a picture in the book. "That's, um, Lyle Gorch, and that one's his brother, Tector. They're from Abilene. They made their reputation by massacring an entire Mexican village in 1886." He took off his glasses to clean them, a sure sign he found this distasteful.

"Friendly little demons," Buffy commented.

Giles shook his head. "That was before they became vampires." Everyone looked absolutely thrilled to hear that. "But, um, the good news is that they're… not amongst the great thinkers of our times. I doubt if they're up to much. They're probably just drawn here by the, uh, Hellmouth's energy."

"'Nuff said!" Xander enthusiastically. "I propose Buffy slays 'em. All in favor?"

Even though the others still raised their hands, Buffy grumbled all the same. "Great. Now I have to worry about Butch and Sundance while I'm taking care of 'JJ' here." She looked at Jesse imploringly. "I don't suppose you can take custody tonight?"

"Sure," he replied amiably, taking the egg. "We can take turns being parents. That's practically how I was raised."

Giles still looked uncertain. "I don't think you should underestimate them. I mean, you may need to have some help if, if, if, if…" He finally realized something. "Why do you all have eggs?"

Willow smiled excitedly. "Hey, maybe you can have Angel help you find the Gorches."

"Yes!" Giles agreed, albeit still confused. "Yes, yes, that's not a bad idea. Strength in numbers."

Xander rolled his eyes. "Oh, right. I see a lotta hunting getting done in that scenario," he snarked.

Buffy gave him a look while accepting egg forms from Jesse. "Please. Like Angel and I are just helpless slaves to passion. Grow up!"

Maybe Xander had a point, Buffy thought to herself as she enjoyed the feeling of Angel's tongue commingling with hers. Golly, kissing was enjoyable. She needed to breathe, though, so she popped up for air, looking into his deep dark eyes. "I really…"

"I know," he replied.

They resumed kissing. Unfortunately, she heard her conscience needling her about the job she should be doing, and she pulled away again. "You know, this isn't hunting in the classical sense. We should…"

"You're right," he agreed. They kissed a little more before they broke it off again. "Okay."

"Okay," she repeated before briefly kissing him again. "Okay." They walked side by side for a few paces. "You see anything?"

"No."

"Okay." She faced him again. "Enough hunting."

They resumed their passionate kissing with renewed vigor, laughing and giggling as they did. Later on, she would reflect on how irresponsible this was and feel embarrassed at her own extreme horniness, but for now, all she could think about was how romantic this was. Making out with an ensouled vampire in the middle of a cemetery without her mother's knowledge – or anyone's knowledge – just amped the excitement. Screw the future. Live for the moment. C'est le vie. Or was it que sera, sera? Inna gadda da vida?

Less think. More kiss, her brain ordered her, and she obeyed.

His day now finished, Jesse had his pajamas on and had finished all of his other homework. Tired after a long but thankfully uneventful day, he checked on his egg sitting on his nightstand. "All right," he murmured, grabbing the egg diary and a pencil. He read off the checklist. "Feeding? Check. Burping? Sure, why not? Diapers…?" He looked at the egg. "Not sure how to tell, but okay. Check." He really didn't know what Whitmore wanted from him, but hey – as long as the egg didn't suffer any trauma that could come up in therapy later, he figured that was good enough. He put the diary and pencil away, then got under the covers and went to sleep.

The next morning, Buffy came to school with several rehearsed excuses for why she missed health class the previous day, only to find all her hard work wasted when she walked up to the door and found a piece of paper taped to it reading 'Health Class Canceled due to Absent Teacher'. Well, at least they were even now.

She rendezvoused with Xander, Jesse and Willow and suggested they head to the library now that they had some free time. She couldn't help noticing that while Xander went about the same as ever, Jesse and Willow both looked seriously drained. Willow had a nice little basket for her egg while Jesse carried his in his button down shirt's front pocket. "You guys okay?" she asked. "Up all night partying with your eggs?"

"Mmm," Jesse replied. "I went to bed at eleven last night. Slept straight through the night until six. No idea what my damage is."

"Should've stayed up late and played computer games like I did," Xander chided. "If you're going to wake up all groggy, you should at least have fun doing it."

Ignoring him, Jesse held out the egg to Buffy. "Here – it's your turn to be the parent today."

Buffy held up a hand to stop him. "Gonna have to take a raincheck on that, Jess."

"But we agreed yesterday we would alternate."

"Yeah, but yesterday, we also agreed I would slay the Gorches, and I failed to do that, too." She shrugged helplessly. "Gotta focus on the slayage before taking care of the wee nipper. You don't mind, right?"

He shifted, looking less than pleased but too sleepy to articulate it. "I guess," he muttered. "Kinda think you could just let it stay home while you slay…"

"I knew you'd understand," Buffy said brightly, already making tracks for the library.

"So no luck with the vamps?" Xander asked as he matched her pace – the drowsy Jesse and Willow trailing behind them.

"Neither sight nor hat of them."

"Not even with Angel helping you?"

She determinedly didn't look at him. "He was just as thorough as I was."

"Thorough at what, exactly?"

Ignoring him, she stepped into the library and immediately spotted Giles coming down from the stacks with a few books. He was very surprised to see them. "Oh! Why are you lot hanging about? Don't you have classes to go to?"

"Teen Health got canceled," Willow replied sleepily.

"Mr. Whitmore's out," Xander confirmed. "Couldn't find an egg sitter or something."

"Well, then, can you give me a hand?" Giles asked, indicating the books that still needed to be shelved. Willow and Jesse both responded in the negative, sitting down on the steps sleepily, while Buffy and Xander both agreed to help, stepping up to join him on the mezzanine level. "How did the hunt go last night, Buffy?" he asked her.

"Angel and I hunted, but no Gorches in sight. Probably lying low since they know I'm on the lookout," she reported.

"It's what happens when you kick their butts so thoroughly the first time," suggested Xander. "Too much of a first impression."

"I have that effect on men."

While Xander made a face, Giles glanced down at Jesse and Willow languishing on the steps. "You both look a little sluggish. Are you quite sure everything's alright?"

"I'm the picture of health," Jesse replied, not opening his eyes. "It's… just that I'm a 'before' picture right now."

"Maybe something we ate," Willow halfheartedly suggested.

"Or perhaps it's the burden of parenthood," Xander much more eagerly suggested. "Notice how seriously you two have taken this egg thing. While I, in turn, have, uh, well, chosen a more balanced approach." He took out his egg from his shirt pocket and started tossing it around.

Willow, even half-asleep, looked concerned. "Xander, maybe you shouldn't…"

Xander ignored her. "That's exactly what I'm talking about," he said, still tossing the egg. "You can't stress over every little thing! A child picks up on that. Which is a one-way ticket to Neurotic City." He caught and tossed the egg a few more times, but he missed the next catch. Everyone let out a yelp in fright as the egg hit the floor – even Giles. To their surprise, the egg just wobbled to a stop, unbroken.

"It didn't break!" Willow exclaimed. She narrowed her eyes. "How come it didn't break?"

Xander's smug expression evaporated. "Which is another secret to conscientious egg care: pot of scalding water and about eight minutes."

"You boiled your young?!"

"Yeah! I know it sounds cruel, but sometimes you gotta be cruel to be kind! I mean, you can bet that little Xander here is thick skinned now."

Jesse sat up a little straighter. "That, sir, is a blatant disregard for the importance of this assignment, and I, for one, am furious that you thought of it before me."

"Technically that would be cheating, yes?" Giles asked, resuming putting books away.

"No!" Xander replied indignantly. "It's like a shortcut. You know, when you run a race?"

"That would also be cheating," Buffy pointed out sternly.

"You should be ashamed," Willow grumbled.

Giles looked reluctantly impressed. "I suppose there is a sort of… Machiavellian ingenuity to your transgression."

"I resent that!" Xander retorted, only to get a look from the librarian. "Or possibly thank you?"

The doors banged open, and they looked up to see a frazzled Cordelia storming up to them. "Figures you four would all be hanging in the dungeon while something major is going on at Sunnydale High."

"And what would that be, Cordelia? Barrette Appreciation Day?" Xander sneered, resuming his shelving.

"Mr. Whitmore didn't show today!"

Buffy shook her head. "That news is of the past."

Cordelia wouldn't let up. "He's missing?" she said slowly, as if talking to a bunch of slow children. "Presumed dead?"

Giles frowned. "Presumed by whom?"

"Well, me!"

"A reputable source," Buffy muttered, still shelving books.

"I think we should give him a few hours before we give up on him completely," said Giles.

Cordelia still looked agitated. "Well, I think we should look around, don't you Xander?"

Xander paused to look at her and shook his head. "It can wait."

"Well, his body could fall out of a closet somewhere," Cordelia continued, giving him a look that seemed to make him nervous. "So we should check some closets to see if he's in a closet?"

"You're right!" Xander said, pointing abruptly and abandoning the books he'd been working on. "There could be a closet. Let's go." He pointed at the rest of them as he came down the stairs. "You guys look for more clues. We'll meet back here." He took Cordelia by the arm and guided her out of the library.

Jesse snorted on the stairs. "I'm awake!" he said, sitting up for all of three seconds before slumping over again.

"I… guess we could, I guess?" Buffy murmured, sharing a confused look with Giles.

Despite her grogginess, Willow still looked alarmed at Xander and Cordelia leaving together. "Are they getting weirder? Have you noticed the weirdness of them?"

The door had barely shut when they heard it open again, and they saw Amy walking in with a hall pass. She looked over her shoulder, having seen Xander and Cordelia depart in a hurry, and then she stopped when she saw Jesse and Willow on the stairs while Buffy and Giles held books. "Are you guys in the middle of something?" she asked awkwardly.

Buffy shrugged. "Just trying to kill psychotic cowboy vampires and care for an egg. Nothing weird." She looked at Giles. "Should I have guilt about not looking for Mr. Whitmore?"

Giles shook his head. "It's too soon to assume anything nefarious. Not every school absence is Hellmouth-related."

"Words of wisdom. That's why you're the smart one."

Amy finished approaching, glancing at the sleepy ones in amusement before addressing Giles. "Mrs Bell wants to know if you have a backup Master Geometry Book," she said.

"Oh, yes, of course," Giles said, retreating back into the stacks.

She looked down at Jesse and gently kicked his foot. "Sleeping at your desk too comfortable for you, Jess?"

"Mmm, just five more minutes…," Jesse replied.

"They're weird," Willow murmured, her head tilting.

Amy rolled her eyes and bent over, repositioning Jesse a little. "Here, sit up a little straighter. You're gonna hurt your neck."

Buffy raised an eyebrow at the sight of Amy literally fussing with Jesse – while also, she noted, just leaving Willow as she was. Checking that it was safe in all directions, she motioned for Amy to join her by the bookcase.

"Hey, I never really got a chance to thank you for helping with my mom's creepy robot boyfriend," she said quietly. "I mean, if you hadn't eaten that happy drug cookie…"

Amy smiled bashfully. "Yeah, for once, my sweet tooth comes in handy."

"And I am forever grateful to it," Buffy smiled. She leaned in closer. "And Jesse told me you were the one who got him to take my concerns seriously. He said you were very firm with him."

Okay, now Amy was blushing. "Yeah, well… No big."

Buffy nearly giggled. "Oh my god, Amy, you're crushing so bad!"

"Shh! I am not!" She glanced behind herself to make sure no one had heard, then leaned forward again. "Not a word!"

"No one will know, I promise. Seriously though – Jesse?!"

"What's wrong with Jesse?"

"Nothing! I just mean… When did this even start?"

Amy put her hands in her pockets and swiveled from side to side shyly. "Well, it was, like, right after that stuff with my mom – when he made brownies for me? I thought, 'well, that was sweet. He's a sweet guy.' But I wasn't really ready then. Your witch of a mom trying to steal your body has an effect on you." She began to smile. "But I think I really became 'into him' last Halloween."

Buffy thought back, and the memory made her frown. "Wait… when we became our costumes and he became a pointy-hatted long-bearded sorcerer?!"

"It was when we met that Ethan Rayne guy at the costume shop, and it looked like he was gonna do something to Giles…" She held up her arm dramatically, miming holding somebody by the neck. "And Jesse used his magic to subdue the guy."

"You fell for him because he strangled a guy with magic?"

"It wasn't just that!" She bit her lip to prevent a smile. "Although, he did look totally badass. No, it was that, even though he was somebody else at that moment, his first instinct was to protect Giles." Her smile turned bashful and she looked at her shoes. "I dunno, I just thought… it was sweet."

"So why haven't you made a move yet? That was a while ago."

Amy shrugged. "I mean… I dunno, I just don't know if I'm ready, or if he's ready… He was hung up on Cordelia for years."

"Hey, he's totally over her," Buffy said with an assuring hand on her shoulder. "I mean, sure, they talk sometimes, but he hasn't talked about getting with her for months now. I promise." She smiled a little. "Do you want me to say something?"

"No! No, thanks, Buffy. I just…" She took a breath. "If he's going to hear about it, I'd rather he hear about it from me." They heard footsteps, indicating Giles' imminent return. She gave her a look. "Don't breathe a word of this, okay?" she whispered.

"Okay, okay, this conversation never happened."

Giles appeared around the corner, carrying the textbook. "Here you are," he said, handing it over. She smiled gratefully, gave Buffy one more look, then turned and left the library, giving Jesse's foot a playful kick as she left. He grunted half heartedly and drifted off to sleep. "Curious girl," he murmured as the door shut behind her.

"Aren't we all," Buffy said absently as she resumed working the shelves.

"You'll resume your search tonight, yes?"

"Oh yeah. I'll sweep the cemetery. With Angel's help, we'll find them eventually."

Late into the night, Buffy once again engaged Angel in a passionate kissing session. They'd probably done actual searching for ten minutes before they'd given in. Or had it been three? And had it been minutes? Vampires may not be particularly warm, but they had energy. Realizing they had probably been at this for a long time, she broke it off. "As much as I hate to say this, we should really go kill bad guys," she panted, kissing him again.

"It's late," Angel said. "You should really get home. Hmm?" He kissed her again.

"What about the Gorches?" Kiss.

"I'll hunt." Kiss.

"Really?" She pulled back and smiled. "You'd do that?"

He shrugged. "Not like I have an early day tomorrow."

"Mm," she kissed him again, "true." They started to walk. What the heck time was it? The moon had definitely covered some distance during all that kissage. "Man, two nights in a row where I blew off killing the bad guys. Jesse's gonna be mad."

"What for?"

"Oh, I told you, that faux parenting gig we're doing at school. He's my partner, and I've been dumping the egg on him for this. It's such a dumb assignment. Like I'm really planning to have kids anytime soon." She glanced up at him. "Uh, maybe someday, in the future, when I'm done having a life, but… right now kids would be just a little too much to deal with."

"I wouldn't know," he replied, looking at her with that brooding angst that made her heart pound. "I don't… Well, you know, I, I can't."

"Oh." She looked away briefly, trying to think of more to say. "That's okay, um… I figured there were all sorts of things vampires couldn't do. You know, like work for the Telephone Company, or volunteer for the Red Cross, or… have little vampires."

"So you don't think about the future?" he asked.

"No."

"Never?" He almost sounded concerned.

"No."

"You really don't care what happens a year from now? Five years from now?"

Could he really not understand? In the short time they'd known each other, she'd already come to the conclusion that he was it for her. There could be no one else. "Angel, when I look into the future… all I see is you! All I want is you."

"I know the feeling." He reached down to kiss her. He found her lips and she responded. As they kissed more and more passionately, all thoughts of eggs and school and the future got flushed out of her brain. As far as she was concerned, this moment – being here with the vampire she loved in their forbidden romance – was more important than anything else going on in her life right now. Angel was her life. And she was going to be with him forever.

Jesse had taken a nap after school and felt a little better. He'd finished his homework and gone about his day, had dinner and taken a refreshing shower. He figured Buffy probably wouldn't have found the Gorches tonight, either – especially if Angel was helping her. Probably off making out with him right now. Well, one day, he'd have someone to make out with, and the next time he and Buffy got paired on a project, he'd be the one dumping all the work on her while he went out and had fun. Well, probably not, he thought reasonably. He didn't like to feel bitter, but no one had shown any interest in him since the invisible girl last year. He wondered if he should still feel guilty about that.

Those thoughts sent him drifting off to sleep.

When he next awoke, it was to a loud noise somewhere in his room. He sat up in bed, taking in his surroundings as he blinked his eyes back into reality. The window remained shut and locked, his closet door hung open but nothing looked out of the ordinary there, and his desk looked untouched. Should he go back to sleep?

Then, he felt his blanket move over his body, as if something were pulling it off of him. He reached over and switched on his lamp – and came face-to-face with a small purplish-gray thing with tentacles climbing over his bed. With a yelp, he jumped away from it, landing flat on his ass on the floor. He scrambled up and looked for a weapon, just barely dodging the thing as it jumped at him.

Scrambling to the far side of his room, he looked around for a weapon. He grabbed the heaviest thing on hand – his old Star Trek metal lunchbox – and brandished it like a sword. He couldn't see it. He couldn't even hear it. He stood very still and listened, waiting to see if it came out from under the bed or behind the curtains, but nothing happened. The one thing he did notice, however – the egg shells on his nightstand. Three large pieces and many small pieces sat around the egg cup he'd placed it in, and he could see the small trail of shell leading from the nightstand to his bed.

Not wanting to deal with this thing alone, he felt around on his desk until he got his phone off the cradle, and he quickly hit the speed dial for the one friend who could possibly help him. He waited for her to pick up, but after a few rings, he got her machine. "Hiiii, this is Buffy! Sorry I couldn't come to the phone for some ungodly reason! Please leave a message!"

After the beep, Jesse tried to talk quickly. "First of all, get a less peppy answering message! Second, Buffy – something's in my room, and I think it came out of our egg! I need your help! I can't – !" He jumped as something landed on his phone with a smash. The weird little creature had just dropped from the ceiling and ended his call. He held the receiver dumbly in his hand, tilting his head at it. "Clever girl," he murmured.

And then it pounced him.

Buffy didn't get home until sometime after two in the morning, but she managed to do it without alerting her mother's attention, so she got a few hours sleep and woke up feeling pretty guilt free. She got herself ready for school and headed downstairs for breakfast.

Joyce had made waffles, which Buffy took gratefully. "Morning!"

"Sleep well last night?" her mother asked, glancing up from her own food.

"Like a rock." She froze briefly. Had her mother noticed her disappearing act last night? "How about you?" she asked cautiously.

"Not too bad, except around one in the morning when your phone started ringing."

Buffy swallowed. "My phone rang last night?"

"Yes. Did you not answer it? It rang for almost thirty seconds."

"Uh, no, I didn't. I must've been pretty out of it." Dammit, the call must've come while she was out with Angel. "Um, I'll go check my machine." Grabbing a waffle, she ran upstairs and finished it before she'd entered the room.

Indeed, she saw the flashing red light telling her she had a message. Quick as a wink, she pressed the button. "Hiiii, this is Buffy! Sorry I couldn't come to the phone for some ungodly reason! Please leave a message!"

After the beep, she heard Jesse's voice. "First of all, get a less peppy answering message! Second, Buffy – something's in my room, and I think it came out of our egg! I need your help! I can't – !" The message ended abruptly, and that was it. Now waffles and dread both filled her stomach. She grabbed her things and made a run for it out the door. Jesse hadn't sounded too terrified, but if that call came at one in the morning, god knew what fate had befallen her friend.

She didn't bother telling her mother much. Just that Jesse needed help with the egg project and she needed to see him quickly. She ran all the way to school in nothing flat and scanned the crowd of arriving students. The first person she recognized was Cordelia, who had just finished talking with a friend. Complete with a teddy bear backpack.

"Nice bear," Buffy said conversationally. "Listen, is your…?"

"Hey!" Cordelia interrupted snottily. "I'll have you know that my father brought this bear back from Gstaad years ago. Then all of a sudden these 'trendoids' everywhere started sporting them. So I'm totally not wearing it. Then I thought, hey, I'm the one who started this nationwide craze! What am I ashamed of?"

"Okay, Soliloquy Girl, I just wanted to ask about your egg."

"My egg?"

"Yeah. Your egg. The one Mr. Whitmore gave you."

Cordelia hefted her bag. "It's in my bear."

"So, your egg isn't acting odd or anything?"

She got a trademark Cordelia Chase sneer. "It isn't acting anything. It's an egg, Buffy, it doesn't emote." She got distracted by another friend and walked off. "Shanisse! Is that your real hair?"

Buffy watched her go before scanning the crowd again, and this time, she saw Jesse approaching. Filled with relief to see him intact, she ran up to him. "Jesse! Are you okay?!"

Jesse smiled that usual sleepy smile of his – unlike yesterday when he'd been irritable and cranky. "One hundred percent, Buffinator."

"Okay, good! I am so sorry I missed your call last night! What happened?!"

"Oh, that. Sorry it was so brief. My phone kinda… got busted in the altercation. But I'm fine. My window was open and it darted out."

"What was it?! You said it was in the egg?!"

"Yeah, it was this small weird squishy thing. It got away, though. My theory – the Gorches probably set it up as a trap for you, but since it found me instead, it let me go and made a break for it." He winced. "Not sure how this is going to affect our grade."

"Forget our grades! I'm just glad you're okay!" She took a breath to calm down. "See, this is all my fault. If I'd had the egg last night, nothing would've happened to you, and I would've killed it myself."

"Oh, no sweat. It all worked out."

"No, I have decided – I have to make this up to you. I'll take the rap for the broken egg. We'll tell Whitmore I dropped it. While helping needy kids with their homework."

Jesse smiled. "Whatever you wanna do, Buff."

Finally feeling better, she put a hand on his shoulder. "Good. Just… thanks for not getting killed. If you died because of me, Amy would probably kill me."

"Amy?"

Buffy winced as she remembered her promise yesterday, but dammit, she was just glad her friend was okay, and it started to spill out. "Yeah, you didn't hear it from me, but… she totally likes you."

He laughed at that. "Oh really? Well, that's nice of her."

Okay, that was kind of an underreaction. "Yeah, she's got it bad for you," she continued, trying to give him a hint. "Maybe you should have a talk with her sometime?"

"Sure!" he said amiably. "Amy's great. We talk all the time."

"No, Jesse, you're missing my – Hey!" She felt a hand on her shoulder, and she turned around to see Willow smiling pleasantly at them. "Oh, Will – it's you! Sorry, I'm a little on edge this morning."

"Everything okay?" Willow asked, immediately interested.

"Yeah, yeah, fine." Buffy scanned the area and spotted Xander sitting on a wall with a candy bar, so she started leading the group towards him so they could all talk. "We had an incident last night with our egg."

"Oh? What happened?"

"We think the Gorches swapped 'JJ' with a demon egg of some kind," Jesse explained. "Meant for Buffy, but I got it instead."

"Whoa! And you're okay?"

Jesse gave her a wink. "Totally fine." He looked around. "Doesn't look like anyone else is freaking out, so presumably their eggs are normal."

Buffy followed his eyes. She could see Cordelia approaching with a book, and now Xander had swapped his candy bar for his own egg – gads, he was going to eat it. "Yeah, looks like it," she grimaced.

"Okay," said Willow helpfully. "Well, I'll get Giles, and we'll break out the books and see if we can identify it."

"It always comes back to the books," Buffy sighed.

They finally reached Xander, who smiled when he saw them. "Hey," he said. He held up the egg, ready to take a bite. He found a purplish-gray creature inside, dead. He mercifully noticed it just before he could take a bite and freaked out, screaming as he tossed it away.

Xander tapped his fingers on the table as he and Buffy looked at the dead purple creature on the science table. He'd calmed down now, but his heart still pounded in his chest at the thought that Xander Jr was actually a small purple squiggly thing. "Can I just say 'Gyughhh'!"

"I see your 'Gyughhh!' and raise you a 'Nyaghhh'!"

Cordelia had followed them in. "What is it?"

Still on edge, Xander couldn't help being short with her. "We don't know what it is, Cordelia, that's why we're here. Capisce?"

She scrunched up her face in that adorable way that he hated. "'Capisce'? What are you, world traveler now?"

They looked up as Jesse and Willow came into the lab. "Hey, where's Giles?" asked Buffy. "I know he won't wanna miss this."

"He'll be here soon," said Jesse. "We just need to get the ball rolling."

Xander picked up a scalpel and handed it to Buffy. "Roll away, Buffy! Dissect it or something."

"Me?" Buffy said, looking between him and the tool. "Why do I have to dissect it?

"Uh, because you're the Slayer?"

"And I slayed! My work here is done!" She put the scalpel on the table in front of Xander.

"Oh, no, I almost ate one of those things. I think I've fulfilled my gross-out quota for the decade."

"Guys…," Willow said with a sigh. She took the scalpel and started the dissection.

Glad to have that resolved, Xander looked between his friends. "Do we even know what to look for? I mean, how are we supposed to figure out what this thing is?"

Buffy shrugged. "Turn it over. Maybe we missed its ID bracelet."

"So, now I guess, uh, we know what happened to Mr. Whitmore."

"He saw this and ran away?" Cordelia asked hopefully.

"Try 'best case scenario'," Buffy said grimly.

"Not necessarily," said Jesse optimistically. "He's not dead until we find a body. Until then, it's entirely possible the offspring simply used him to return to the Mother Bezoar."

Xander nodded along. "Yeah. Maybe he…" Then, his friend's words registered with him and he turned to look at him. "What?"

Buffy looked similarly baffled. "What's a bez…?" She got cut off when Cordelia rudely hit her across the face with the bar, knocking her down and out.

"Cordy! What…?!" But then something hit him over the head – Willow's microscope – and everything suddenly went black.

Amy clutched the geometry textbook to her chest. The school had gone very quiet, and she hadn't seen as many kids around today. Several classes had been canceled, either due to low attendance or more teachers disappearing. She tried to enjoy the inherent lack of structure in the school day, but as the sun went down, and her teacher asked her to return the textbook, she began to feel very uncomfortable.

She walked into the library and looked around. Dark and dank as ever, but today, even that didn't feel very comforting. "Hello?" she called out. "Anyone here?"

"Hello?" She turned and saw Giles poking his head out of the cage, having just been putting some books away. "Amy?"

"Giles! Hey, I'm just bringing back the textbook. Thanks for… y'know, it."

"Oh, not at all," he said, crossing the distance to her and taking it. "Bit of a slow day, isn't it?"

"Way slow, and not the relaxing kind," she said, rubbing her arms anxiously. "What the heck is going on around here? Everyone seems to be… disappearing."

"Oh? I'm afraid I've not noticed. The library has always felt a bit isolated from the rest of the school." He smiled faintly. "One of the perks of the job, really."

Amy smiled, too, but she still felt odd. "What about Buffy? Has she been around?"

"No, actually. I was meaning to talk to her. She still hasn't taken out the Gorch vampires, and, frankly, she seemed concerned about the egg."

"The egg? You mean that Teen Health project?"

"Yes, she was here earlier…" He pulled open a drawer, but then, they heard a noise in the hall. "What was that?"

Amy turned to look at the door. "Probably another freshman tripped and fell," she said hopefully, taking a few steps towards it. "It would be nice if it were, anyway. Something nice and safe and normal…"

She turned around just in time to see Giles holding out a strange purplish-gray creature he'd pulled from the card catalog drawer, and he was holding it out to her with a now-blank expression. Letting out a yelp, she leapt backwards from him, but he continued to walk towards her with the wriggly thing reaching out for her.

"Giles?! Giles!" she shouted, but his expression never changed, just staring blankly at her. Realizing he might not be in his right mind, she held out a hand at him and recalled a spell. "Defendat me ab iniuria!" There was a small puff of smoke between them, and some kind of magic force field popped up and sent Giles and his weird pet flying backwards. While the librarian landed on his back some distance away, the creature landed and promptly began scurrying towards her. Looking around frantically, she grabbed the geometry textbook off the counter and slammed it down on the creature. It squished flat in a splash of blue goop.

Seeing Giles starting to get up again, still looking very blank in the face, she turned and ran out the door. She needed to find Buffy.

Buffy awoke in darkness. Blinking herself back into reality, she briefly wished to be unconscious again. If she couldn't wake up in her own bed, she didn't want to wake up. Grimacing, she felt around and figured out she was on the floor of some utility closet. Tools, cleaning implements and the like littered the floor and walls. Then, she heard a groan next to her and found…

"Hey! Xander!" She slapped his cheek, making him groan again. "Hey! You alright?"

Now awake and also unhappy with their situation, Xander moaned and blinked his eyes. "Last time Cordy dragged me in here, it was a lot nicer."

"What?" He must be delirious.

As if realizing what he'd said, he shook himself out of it. "Uh… Huh? Nothing. Uh, crazy talk. Head trauma."

"Tell me about it. I'm gonna have a big bump," she agreed, feeling the back of her head.

"Uh, I'm gonna have a peninsula!" he snapped, pointing at his head as she helped him up. "Here, what the hell's goin' on? Jesse and Cordy and Willow?"

"Something to do with the hatchlings, I'm sure of it," Buffy said, already feeling guilty again about Jesse, but shame wouldn't do her any good now. She tried the door, but, of course, it was locked.

Xander continued to ask questions. "What, are they possessed?"

"I don't know. But they sure wanted us out of the way."

"Well, why not kill us? Why, uh, why drag us in here?"

A good question. As she looked around the room, she spotted two familiar somethings on the floor. Two eggs. One of which was rocking back and forth ominously.

Xander saw them as well and took a step back. "Oh. Bad now."

Buffy looked around for something heavy and saw a toolbox. She picked it up from the shelf, raised it and smashed it onto the two eggs. A dark blue slime squirted out around the toolbox, killing the hatchlings instantly. Blech. She used that grossed out feeling to fuel her kick that broke open the door.

"Thank you," Xander said as he followed her out, still clutching his head.

They ran through the school, finding it getting dark outside already. How long had they been out? Even after Daylight Savings ended, it shouldn't be night already, right? They ran down the deserted halls towards the library, and enroute, they nearly collided with Amy, who looked properly wigged out.

"Oh, thank goddess I found you guys!" she exclaimed. "Everyone's disappearing, and Giles… I dunno, it was like he was possessed or something! He tried to throw this gross purple creature thing at me!"

Buffy's heart sank. "Nooo! Not Giles! We still don't know what the heck we're up against! We can't fight these things until we know something about 'em!"

Xander looked at Amy suspiciously. "Wait, hold on. How do we know you're not possessed right now? Jesse and Cordy and Willow all seemed normal before they clubbed us over the head!"

Amy looked at him incredulously. "Well, I don't know!" she snapped. "How do I know neither of you are possessed?"

"Well, we…! I…!" Xander looked between both girls for a moment before he frowned. "Yeah, actually what's the giveaway? How do we tell who's possessed and who isn't?"

Buffy rolled her eyes. "Well, so far, it seems that people who are taken over by these things are a lot calmer than those who aren't. And judging by the fact that all three of us are wigging to the point of irrationality, I will take that as a sign that none of us are possessed." She started walking back up the hallway.

"Yeah, that seems fair," Xander agreed as he and Amy followed.

A few minutes later, they peeked into the library and found it deserted. No sign of Giles, possessed or otherwise. Peering around, they did the geometry textbook where Amy had thrown it earlier, complete with remains of a hatchling underneath it.

"Glad to know geometry is good for something," Xander mused. "Should I feel bad that we're going to leave this for the janitor?"

"So how do we find out what we're fighting?" Amy asked. "Do we go through Giles' books?"

"The ones that are written in English, anyway," nodded Buffy. Checking that the coast was clear, they stepped into his office and found a couple of books already out. They started going through them.

"Do we know what these things are called?" asked Amy.

Xander thought for a moment. "Alright, Willow said something. Uh, a name. What was it?"

"A bozo!" Buffy remembered, but then she shook her head. "Not a bozo."

"A bezoar!"

"That's it! Okay, so now… we look it up?"

"Look under 'B', I guess," said Amy, flipping to the B section of her book.

It took a few minutes, but it didn't take too long for Xander to find a picture of the creature he'd almost eaten – a disk-shaped, tentacled monster. "Here's our bozo."

Buffy took the book and read from it out loud "'Pre-pre-historic parasite. The mother hibernates underground, laying eggs. The offspring then attach themselves to a host, taking control of their motor functions through neural clamping.'"

Amy shuddered. "Just imagine what they clamp your neurals with."

"So, our people are taking orders from the mama bezoar. Which begs the question…?"

Xander filled in the rest. "What does mama want?"

At that moment, they heard someone screaming out in the hallway. "Somebody help me!" They ran out to investigate. "Get this thing off me! Get this…! Somebody help me! Help!" Once outside, they saw Jonathon getting up off the floor.

"Are you okay?" Buffy asked him, looking for signs of injury.

Jonathon barely looked at her "I'm fine. I slipped," he said in a very flat voice, compared to the unholy freaking out he'd been doing before. He turned and headed down the hall.

"I think I hear mommy calling," Buffy murmured, and they followed him.

It turned out Jonathon was walking to the school's boiler room. How did it always turn out so many crazy otherworldly shenanigans always took place in her school? Sure, it was on the Hellmouth, but hello? A little variety would be nice. They followed him in and saw him climbing through a hole in the wall behind the boilers. No, not just a hole – a tunnel.

"So," Amy murmured, "I guess we have to follow him?"

"I mean," Xander replied, "we don't have to."

"Yeah, there's no law written that we have to," Buffy agreed. She exchanged glances with them before making for the hole. She climbed in, gave them one last reluctant look, and then proceeded through. At least it's not like Shawshank, she thought.

Thankfully, the tunnel simply took them down to the basement. Why these guys couldn't have just used the stairs, she didn't know, but whatever. She wasn't an evil demon bent on destroying the world. Once Xander and Amy had joined her, they tiptoed after Jonathon and peered inside the complex. Right away, they could see a flurry of activity.

They could see Giles heading to the side ramp that led to a slightly lower level and takes a crowbar handed to him by Mr. Whitmore, who had a box of new Bezoar eggs in his other arm. Across the room, they could see Cordelia wiping off eggs being handed to her from below by another student, to Willow pounding on the concrete floor with a sledgehammer. Jesse went down the other side and took a hoe held out to him by the watchman. He started banging it on the floor as the watchman went back to his post. A large chunk was broken off and appeared to be floating on something, and Willow and Jesse kept pounding on it to break it up into smaller pieces.

"What are they diggin' up?" Xander asked.

Amy pointed past them at the pit, and they could see the slimy pink Mommy Bezoar inside. "Guessing that," she whispered.

Buffy watched as Cordelia handed Mr. Whitmore another egg. "We can't let them spread those eggs."

Xander tried to look confident. "We'll handle it. Um, can you, uh, hold down the fort?"

"I'll try."

Amy looked less than thrilled. "How are we going to 'handle it'?" she demanded.

"Follow my lead." Xander moved off after Cordy, becoming very calm and deliberate in his movements as he skirted past the others into the tunnel. Rolling her eyes, Amy did as he did, and they both disappeared into the darkness. At one point, the possessed Giles handed him a piece of rock. He simply took it and then tossed it aside and continued.

Buffy peered into the digging operation. I'm gonna need a weapon. I'm gonna need a big weapon, she mantra'd to herself. She headed back through the tunnel and back into the boiler room. She dug around until she found a barrel full of steel pipes. Now handily armed, she turned… and heard movement behind her. Come on, really?! She turned and came face-to-face-to-face with the Gorch bros.

"Told you it wasn't over," said Lyle Gorch.

Tector smiled. "She's so cute and little. Can we keep her?"

Buffy tried to be nicely annoyed. "Guys, this is not a great time."

"It's gonna be."

They both rushed her, but she was ready for them. She parried, sending Tector flying back on his ass. Lyle hurled himself at her, and they both went flying into the hole, landing right in the middle of the weird zombie thing. They leapt to their feet, and Lyle seemed to finally register what was happening.

"What the hell is this?"

Buffy stood, and then, she saw a familiar face staring blankly at her, holding a pickaxe. "Jesse?"

Zombie Willow looked up from her own digging for just a second long enough to say, "Kill them." Zombie Jesse swung a pickaxe at Buffy, who blocked it, backing off. Now they had more zombie-minded classmates and teachers heading for them.

Lyle fended off others, and they ended up back to back, fending off all and sundry. "What's going on?" he demanded.

"Long story!" She pushed away a teacher as Lyle knocked someone out. In a moment of brief respite, they turned to each other and started trading blows – they were enemies, after all. Then, more zombies attacked, and they got back to business.

Xander and Amy tiptoed after Cordy and one of the other teenagers as they walked up another tunnel with more eggs. Briefly feeling bad about this, Xander steeled his resolved, came up behind the other boy his age and grabbed his head, slamming it into a brick wall, knocking him out good. Unfazed, Cordy placed her eggs on the floor and came at them. He weaved away from a punch and tried to remain calm. "Cordelia, I don't want to hurt you… some of the time…"

During this, however, he could see Amy moving slowly behind her, and she seemed fixated on something on Cordelia's back. She signaled for Xander to keep talking – something he could do very well.

"I just… I know we haven't always seen eye-to-eye and everything, but there are also times where I don't think you're so bad…" Oh man, even in a life-or-death situation, he could not spill the beans in front of Amy. "I just… you're so fashionable and… I dunno… nice, sometimes? Y'know, when the mood strikes you and the wind's in the right direction, and…"

Amy grabbed Cordy by the shoulders and hurled her backwards into the brick wall hard, and Xander could hear something shrill in a high-pitched noise. Cordy's eyes widened, as if coming back into reality, and Amy reached under her top and felt around until she pulled something away and threw it on the ground – one of the hatchlings! Realizing his chance, Xander grabbed a cinder block from the floor and slammed it down on the ugly little mutant, killing it in a puddle of goo. He turned in time to see Cordy pass out on the floor in a dead faint.

After checking she still had a pulse, he sighed with relief. "Thanks for doing that," he said gratefully. "Regardless of my… feelings for her, I would've felt so bad."

Amy took a few deep breaths and nodded, hands on hips. "Yeah, happy to help."

Buffy and Lyle had managed to reach high ground at the entrance of a caved-in tunnel, and the zombies milled around below them, now more focused on containing them. At least now she didn't have to worry about kicking her totally-mortal classmates.

Then, Tector emerged from the hole, furious. He stopped, looking at the tableau of digging and fighting. Looking curious, he wandered through the still-digging people and approached the hole – moron – and knelt down to look inside. He could see the Bezoar moving right below his face.

A tentacle shot out and wrapped around his head, pulling into the hole before he had time to scream. They could only listen, as somewhere down below, Tector cried out, followed by loud chomping noises.

"TECTOR!" Lyle shouted in horror as his brother got eaten. He turned on Buffy. "This is all your fault!"

"How?!" Buffy demanded.

But he grabbed her and threw her down toward the hole. She rolled down the slope and came to a stop next to it. A tentacle came up and wrapped around her feet. She looked down at it, and then saw another pair of feet. They belonged to Zombie Jesse, who swung the pickaxe down at her face! She rolled as it buried itself in the ground next to her head. She knew she only had one chance. She grabbed hold of it just as the tentacle yanked her toward the hole. She strained to hold on, but it pulled free from the rock, and she fell into the hole holding it.

She landed on the Bezoar. Looking it right in the eye, she took the pickaxe and swung it repeatedly into the flesh. It sprayed her with slime all over her outfit, and that just infuriated her enough to kill it even more. Stab after stab after stab, until it finally stopped crying out and died already.

Energy spent, she threw the gunk-covered pickaxe to the surface, then slowly dragged her gunk-covered self back onto the pavement. She took in the room. Lots of dead hatchlings on the floor, surrounded by her friends, teachers and classmates all passed out around them. Breathing heavily to try and control her rage, she glared at the astonished Lyle, who slowly began to back away from her. Smartest thing he'd done all day.

"Okay, it's over now…" And he broke out into a sprint back through the tunnel.

Dirt-covered students, still groggy and confused, wandered out of the building. Giles did his best to herd them despite his own confusion. "Yes, it was a gas leak, just get some air and… and a good night's rest, and you'll all be fine…" He wandered over to Xander. "What really happened?"

Xander looked at him sympathetically. "Stick with the gas leak story. I'll tell you tomorrow." The Watcher just nodded gratefully and left with the crowd. He crossed to Willow, Cordy and Jesse, who all looked tired and dirty. "How're you guys doing?" he asked.

Willow looked very shamefaced. "Did I really hit you?"

"Knocked me out."

Amy walked up holding three bottled waters that she handed over to the three non-zombies. "Here," she said. "You've been breathing dirt all day. Drink up."

Cordelia made a face at the label on the bottle. "Couldn't get spring water?" she demanded. Amy started to take her bottle away, but she managed to snatch it. "I'm not saying I won't drink it. I'm just saying – quality is important."

They all glanced up when they saw Buffy – now gunk free and wearing her gym clothes after showering. She smiled awkwardly when she saw them. "Everyone okay?"

"I've been worse," shrugged Jesse after a sip of water. He held up his hand disdainfully. "I will never get these fingernails clean, though."

While the others smiled tiredly, Buffy looked between him and Amy. "How much…do you guys remember?" she asked cautiously.

"Total blur," said Cordelia. "I remember being in my room when something dropped onto my back and something went in my ear."

"Yeah," agreed Jesse. "Same here. I vaguely remember actions but nothing substantive."

Buffy shifted, still glancing between him and Amy. "So… you don't remember what we talked about this morning?"

"No. Why? What did we talk about?"

Ultimately, she decided to take a different route. "I… apologized for making you do the egg project so I could go vampire hunting." She looked down sheepishly. "Because, I wasn't really doing much hunting. It was mostly just to hang out with Angel."

Jesse grinned a little. "Ooh, you blew off our ever-so-fun egg project for a little hanky panky tomfoolery? Buffy, how dare you?"

The others laughed, but Buffy still felt bad. "Hey, if I had had the egg last night, it would've attacked me instead of you, and I totally would have taken it. No offense," she added hastily, but he took none. "In any case, I'm sorry I didn't help with the assignment, and I should make it up to you. How about I do your homework for the rest of the week?"

Jesse paused, and from the way he bit his lip, she could tell he was choosing his words very carefully. "Buff… um…" He almost laughed. "I get better grades than you."

Willow nodded. "It's true. He does. I tutored him."

Buffy pouted. "Well, I should still make it up to you."

Jesse jumped down from the wall and walked over to her. "Tell you what – next time we all get our minds taken over by gross little monsters, I get to save you. Okay? Now, let's call it a night. All that digging wore me the hell out."

The others nodded and began to make tracks. Buffy slouched off behind them. "You're sure you're okay? I feel like I should pay a bigger price for all this."

Jesse glanced over his shoulder at her. "Well, if you insist, maybe you could not make out with Angel for a week?"

Buffy's eyes widened. "Or, y'know, we could let bygones be bygones."

"Sounds good to me."