Here's a playful take on "Steamed Hams," recast in the world of Oggy and the Cockroaches, with Oggy as the beleaguered host and Jack as the ever‑skeptical guest.
Title
Roachburgers
Genres
Comedy
Parody
Animated Short
Summary
When Jack comes over to inspect Oggy's latest "culinary experiment," Oggy panics after burning the roast cockroach cutlets he'd prepared. Thinking on his paws, he whips up a batch of "Roachburgers" to pass off as his own, launching a cascade of increasingly absurd excuses. Jack's suspicions—and Oggy's fibs—spiral toward cartoonish chaos, complete with malfunctioning gadgets, wayward roaches, and a narrowly averted kitchen disaster.
Screenplay
CAST
Oggy (host; overly tidy blue cat)
Jack (guest; olive‑green cat, quick to anger and invention)
(Cameo: three mischievous cockroaches peek in on occasion)
Scene 1: Oggy's Kitchen, Late Afternoon
[Oggy, in a pristine chef's hat, bustles around a spotless kitchen. Jack arrives at the door, holding a clipboard.]
Jack
(eyebrows raised)
Oggy, I assumed you said "roast cockroach cutlets." I'm here to inspect your new anti-roach device... not critique your dinner.
Oggy
(delighted)
Ah, Jack! Yes, yes—welcome. Come on in. Nothing to see here but a perfectly normal cat's lunch.
Jack
(sniffs the air)
Is that... smoke?
Oggy
Smoke? Oh, that—just the "smoky ambience" setting on my new automatic stovetop. Very avant‑garde.
Oggy hurriedly opens the oven. A plume of black smoke billows out.
Jack
(leans in)
Oggy, why is everything burnt to a crisp?
Oggy
(smiling nervously)
Uh—charcoal flavor! Healthier… detoxifying charcoal.
Jack raises an eyebrow. Oggy frantically slaps a lid on a sizzling pan.
Scene 2: The Great "Roachburger" Ruse
Jack
You said "roasted cockroach cutlets," not "charcoal." And I'm pretty sure detox charcoal isn't on the menu.
Oggy
(gesturing grandly)
Which is why I present to you—my brand-new creation: "Roachburgers"! Totally original, never seen before.
Oggy flips a patty in the pan. Three cockroaches scurry past in the background.
Jack
(skeptical)
"Roachburgers"? Isn't that what those three guys out back are selling from their food truck?
Oggy
(nervous chuckle)
Ah, those amateurs. My version is—how do I put this—certified deluxe. Organic… free‑range roach. Very exclusive.
Jack
(folds arms)
Alright, let's see one.
Oggy plunks a steaming "Roachburger" onto a plate.
Scene 3: Chaos Ensues
Jack
(takes a bite, then pauses)
This tastes exactly like—hold on—are those cockroach legs sticking out?
Oggy
(eyes darting)
Ah, that's just... artisanal garnish! Adds texture.
Suddenly, the automatic stovetop malfunctions, launching utensils into the air. The cockroaches pop out of hiding, squeaking in delight.
Jack
(shouting)
Oggy! Your roaches are revolting—literally!
Oggy
(scrambling)
You see, Jack, it's all part of the immersive experience!
The roaches commandeer the kitchen: they leap onto the table, flick burger buns at Jack, and activate one of Oggy's gadgets, which begins spraying foamy cleaner everywhere.
Scene 4: Diplomatic Exit
Jack
(wiping foam off his face)
I think I've seen enough "cuisine." Your invention's impressive, Oggy, but next time, how about an actual menu?
Oggy
(wiping sweat)
You got it, Jack. Next time—no roaches, no smoke… just good old fashioned lasagna.
Jack
(grins)
Now that I'd believe.
They share a wry chuckle as the roaches whisk away the wreckage, humming happily.
END