Disclaimer - I do not own Harry Potter, all characters belong to JK Rowling :)
Chapter warnings: none :)
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Sirius sat at the kitchen table downstairs, cradling a mug of strong coffee and staring out the window at the rising sun. He had been unable to fall back asleep after his conversation with Harry, his mind constantly looping back to their talk, and to the words spoken. He was so wrapped up in thought, he didn't notice when someone entered the kitchen until a he felt a hand on his shoulder.
He turned around, smiling when he saw Remus. "You're up early," he grinned half-heartedly.
"I could say the same," Remus replied, noting the worry in his friend's eyes. "Is everything okay?"
Sirius sighed, running a hand through his long hair. He turned back to face the table, and saw Remus out of his peripheral vision, moving to sit next to him. "Is it Harry?" He asked gently. He had known Sirius a long time, and knew when something was up. And, given the recent events, had a well-founded suspicion that that something was probably his godson.
"He woke up screaming, Moony," Sirius all but whispered. He let go of his mug, his hands moving to cover his face. "I went in there, and he was… it was like he didn't even recognise me. He drew his wand on me! And then- then he realised, and he still looked so scared, but of me. He was convinced that I was angry with him, and I think- I think maybe his relatives- I think they hurt him, Remus. I've never known someone to react in that sort of way except- except me."
Whilst Sirius spoke, Remus just sat there, his full attention on him, and listened.
"He was telling me about his dream, about what happened in the graveyard. He used the cruciatus curse on him, Moony. On a child. And now he feels it every night, in his dreams - imagine feeling that pain every damn night. Once was bad enough, but every night!?"
"Harry shouldn't have to suffer through that," Remus agreed.
"No one should have to endure it, especially not a fucking fifteen year old!" Sirius shot back. Remus knew Sirius well enough to know that his friend wasn't angry with him - he was angry with the situation. And quite rightly so.
Remus sighed heavily. He'd meant to have this conversation later, when they were both well rested and in the right headspace to discuss it, but…
"I've been wanting to talk to you, actually - about Harry," Remus said cautiously, not wanting to upset Sirius further with this new information. However, he reasoned, it was a necessary blow.
"I'm not sure he should go back to Hogwarts, Pads. Not indefinitely," he added, seeing the disbelief on Sirius's face. "Just for now - until he's feeling better, and until we know he's going to be safe there."
"What do you mean? He is feeling better - aside from the nightmares, but still. He doesn't have any new injuries, he's been eating loads at meal times…" Sirius trailed off at the look on Remus's face.
"Have you noticed how Harry tends to leave the table the second everyone finishes?" Remus hoped Sirius would put two and two together - he really didn't want to have to be the one to break it to him.
"Well, yes, but- all teenagers do that. It's normal," Sirius frowned, trying to recall a time when Harry hadn't run off the second the meal finished. He had no luck.
"Well, I, um- I followed him, after dinner one night. I had a suspicion, and I wanted to make sure it was wrong." Remus, usually so sure of his words, faltered. "I found him in the bathroom."
The realisation hit Sirius like a tonne of bricks, turning his stomach to lead. "He- but why would he…"
"I don't know. But I think he's been doing it for a while - it didn't seem like a singular incident."
"What do we do?" Sirius asked, once again looking to Remus for instruction, for him to be the voice of reason. He loved his godson dearly, but he was completely out of his depth.
"We monitor him, try to stop him using the bathroom straight after meals, and we talk to him. Let him know that we care, and that we are there should he want to talk. That's all we can do, Pads - short of forcing food down his throat, which I don't think would be very beneficial in the long run."
"I don't think we should stop him returning to Hogwarts, Moony. It's his home. All his friends are there - his family. I think keeping him here would just aggravate things."
"What if something happens?"
"Something could happen anywhere - here or at Hogwarts. And with all the teachers there, Madam Pomfrey, his friends - I think Hogwarts is the safest place for him right now."
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Thanks for reading! Take care 3