Chapters: 7/?

Word count: 1k

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colour my spine, I'm giving you my all

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part seven

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xix

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Despite it being his suggestion, Satoshi has no destination in mind and isn't even sure if he's in a hurry to find a place to talk.

(All the same, the weather makes the choice for him; mirroring that late grey Spring day when his best friend unexpectedly reunited with a very special girl.)

In search of warmth, Satoshi and Mayaka burrowed into their Winter coats and quickened their pace, shivering with each forward motion — until their feet led them to the arcade.

He knows, he knows.

Months prior, the androgynous boy had deemed the place too worn and dusty for someone as amazing as Mayaka. But, the truth is, it isn't. This is where they first met.

Satoshi is well aware that his crush enjoys being here, the multitudes of character keychains decorating her school bag is proof of her colourful side. He just used the Hifumi tea shop as a setting to wow her with his sophistication.

(Not that it worked.)

With that, Mayaka walks into the building swirling with sharp electronic beeps and carefree chatter and, naturally, Satoshi follows, one step behind.

.

.

.

Tucked away near the back of the game centre, the gacha machines are largely overlooked by arcade enthusiasts. Here, the front's rush of vibrant neon flashing lights and repetitive theme music is replaced with a distant, subdued muffled stillness.

Satoshi's view is of Mayaka.

Her tiny crouched-over figure reminds him of the evening he first saw her. It's as if time bends, and in this moment, he's transported back to a memory; seeing her once again with that same determination gracing her baby-faced features — fingers curled tightly around a coin and pink gaze firmly set, eyes on the prize.

It's no wonder that an intensity had struck him then, something akin to a lightning bolt.

"Did you get what you wanted?" Satoshi asks after Mayaka pops open the capsule. He waits for her to shake her head before telling her, "You can always try again next time."

"Yeah, I suppose so. It's just … sometimes it feels like the odds are stacked up against me."

"Statistically, it sort of is. It's like winning the lottery," Satoshi replies, earning a harrumph in response.

Strangely enough, Mayaka's glum expression only loosens his hold to remain serious. He can't help but let out a chuckle, which she doesn't appreciate, evident by her frown.

Her displeasure is brief, though, vanishing as quickly as it appeared.

(It gives Satoshi hope that she won't ever stay too mad at him.)

Turning to face him, Mayaka asks, "Do you want it?"

"Sure,"

He extends an open palm for Mayaka to place the little character figurine in, and she does, setting it gently at the centre. A smile tugs at the corner of his mouth. This, too, is a reminiscence of the day they met.

(He likes the warmth of her fingertips lingering against his skin. He likes that this is the closest thing to them holding hands.)

"So," She dusts off the invisible dirt from her skirt and stands from her crouched position by the floor. "What is it that you want to talk to me about, Fuku-chan? You seemed pretty deep in thought on the way here."

Involuntarily, Satoshi's hand flexes, fingers curling around Mayaka's gift, closed-fist.

Well, there's no running from it now.

"There are some things on my mind," He tells her.

"Like what?"

Hidden behind the towering pastel-coloured gacha machines, Satoshi fools himself into the illusion of something more personal and intimate; an escape from the public prying eyes of his classmates and friends.

"You," He admits.

"Me?"

"... and Houtarou,"

Mayaka is slow to respond. "Me and Oreki?"

Satoshi nods. "I was wondering if we could continue that conversation we had the other day. The one about Toba-san and her relationship with Houtarou."

She makes an expression, one Satoshi has seen more times than he can count.

He's caught her looking at Houtarou with that same face, always with an undercurrent of hurt beneath it. He wishes he could claim ignorance, but Satoshi has never been quick enough to look away. And when their gazes inevitably meet — pink against brown — Mayaka would flush, making it all the more awkward when she realises he's noticed.

"You said you thought you were important to Houtarou, and I don't think you made the wrong judgment for coming to that conclusion," Satoshi says honestly, praying he doesn't lose any momentum in the words that cluttered his mouth. "You and Houtarou have talked every day since the first day of school and even more so after you joined the Classics Club. It's only natural to think that way. I'd even argue that you are important to him."

Focus now glued to the ground, Mayaka stares at her shoes, damp and slightly muddied from the slush.

She hasn't mentioned the 'maybe Asami Toba is Houtarou Oreki's girlfriend' incident since, but Satoshi knows she meant what she said.

Still, the way she crumbles — into a mix of embarrassment and shame — makes him think that, perhaps, she regrets her impulsive outburst.

If she asks, he'd tell her that it didn't bother him. The fact that she could share all of this with him, without pretending it never happened, means something to him.

"Fuku-chan …" She begins then lifts her chin.

The small high schooler reaches forward and tugs at the sleeve of his bomber jacket, guiding Satoshi to a corner where they can lean against the wall.

All at once, Mayaka suddenly seems exhausted. "I'm not important to Oreki. At least, not anymore. Not how I used to be."

Satoshi blinks at her. "What do you mean? I haven't noticed Houtarou act any differently towards you."

"That's because I'm not talking about how he's treating me now." Mayaka confesses, "I mean back in elementary school. We were friends. Close friends, for six years — then suddenly, we weren't. Oreki grew distant and …" Her voice becomes quieter, almost hesitant. "It doesn't matter how much I think about it, I still can't figure out what I could have said to change things or how he can pretend nothing happened."

.

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And this is all that's needed before things come tumbling out.

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Notes: Hello, it's been a while. I literally blinked and it's now a year later.

This chapter isn't much. It was supposed to be longer with more feels, but I decided to split it into parts. I'm still recovering from my last job, it was so emotionally taxing and I haven't built up the bandwidth yet.

Also, I'm an adult with a 9-5 job and a writing schedule of posting at least one written work a month — which in itself is non-linear.

I received some comments on AO3 that misunderstood Satoshi's actions involving a love confession, but it's more of a 'talking to each other and heart-to-heart stuff' situation, nothing terribly romantic.

I'll try to finish this fic in 2025 but I just started a new job position at a new firm and it's busy.

— 2 April 2025