Chapter 6: Problem Solver
It was a bright Saturday morning in a small suburban neighborhood. It was peaceful, with the soft calls of birds resonating across the street and the breeze flowing serenely through the houses. The environment was relatively quiet, save for the soft growl of an engine. A car drives down this street before parking in front of a certain house. The car was gray and sleek with low headlights - an Acura NSX. A man sharply dressed in a black and white suit with black bow tie exits the car. His face was equally sharp, with golden eyes and wavy violet hair tucked into a professional comb. The man walked up to the house that he parked in front of and rang the doorbell. He was here on a mission - someone had called for a quick clean up and as his modus operandi, he was going in smooth and fast. The door opened for him, the person opening the door revealed to be a woman with fiery red hair in a bathrobe over white undergarments.
The man reached something from his coat pocket. "Your name is Miss Himeko, right? This is your house?"
"Sure is." Was her reply. "Just Himeko is fine."
He reached out his hand for her to shake. "I'm Veritas Ratio, I solve problems."
"Good, we got one." With Himeko's exasperated tone, he was expecting something pretty bad.
"So I've heard, may I come in?"
"Of course, come on in." Himeko replied, stepping aside to allow Ratio in. He walked inside, seeing the house to be a rather small bungalow with a single floor. The door leads to the living room to the left and the kitchen to the right, along with a dining table next to the counters of the kitchen. There were two people standing close to the dining table, next to a door that led to outside and presumably a garage. These two were the duo that Ratio was looking for. Two young women, both dressed in black suits and covered in blood. One had pink hair and blues, the woman had gray hair and golden eyes. Ratio was more focused on the pink haired lady.
"You must be March." He inquired, his eyes then moved towards the woman. "Which makes you…Stelle."
Ignoring the guilty looks from the two, Ratio cleared his throat. "Let's get down to brass tacks, ladies. If I was informed correctly, the clock's ticking. Is that right, Himeko?"
"One hundred percent."
"Your wife, Kafka, comes home at 9:30 in the A.M, correct?"
"Yes."
"I was led to believe if she comes home and finds us here, she would not appreciate it much, would she?"
"She wouldn't. She'd be having your heads if she did."
Ratio sported an amused smile. Hell hath no fury like a tired spouse seeing a mess when they return home. He quickly checked his pocket watch he fished from his pants pocket. "That gives us 40 minutes to gather everything and vanish…" He then turns to March and Stelle. "...which if you do what I say, when I say it, will be plenty." He snaps his fingers, pointing at the door behind them. "Now, you have a corpse in the car, minus a head, in a garage. Take me to it."
The two didn't say a word as March led Ratio to the garage, where the car in question is parked. It was a 1974 Chevrolet Nova, which would've looked like a fine car had it not been for the bloodied back window. Ratio walked up to it and saw remnants of what happened in the backseat. Indeed, a corpse without a head, perhaps blown up from a high caliber pistol, slumped against the seat. Bits of brain and skull still decorate the backseat and the front seat. March, Stelle and Himeko peeked at the gruesome sight from the side.
"Himeko?" Ratio suddenly asked.
"Yes?"
"Would you do me a favor? Thought I smelled some…coffee back there. Could you perhaps make me a cup?" He requested.
"Of course." She nodded, about to head back inside the house, before asking. "Oh, um, how do you take it, Mr. Ratio?"
"Sweet. But black is fine, if you so wish." Was his reply. Himeko then left the garage to prepare her signature coffee.
As Ratio inspected the bloodied car, he asked. "About the car, is there anything I need to know? Does it stall? Does it smoke? Does it make a lot of noise? Is there fuel in it?"
March glanced at the car. "Aside from how it looks, the car's perfectly fine."
"Positive?" Ratio questioned. "Don't get me on the road and I find out the brake lights don't work."
"As far as I know, the Chevy's in tip-top shape."
After one last inspection, Ratio nodded. "Good enough. Let's return to the kitchen."
As the three returned to the kitchen, Himeko was by the counter holding a mug of coffee. She handed it over to the older man of the group. "Here you go, Mr. Ratio."
"Thank you." He receives it and takes a long sip of the black elixir. He blinks, it was by far one of the best blends of coffee he's tasted. And he has gone through many restaurants and cafes in his lifetime. He gives Himeko a smile to acknowledge her coffee making skill before returning to the task at hand.
"Okay, first thing, you two." He points at the duo. "Take the body, stick it in the trunk." Pacing slowly to Himeko, Ratio then asks. "Now, Himeko, this looks to be a pretty domesticated house. That leaves me to believe that in the garage and under the sink you have cleaning agents, is that correct?"
"Yes, Mr. Ratio, under the sink."
"Good." He turns back to March and Stelle, speaking in a rapid tone. "What I need you two to do is take those cleaning products and clean the inside of the car - and I'm talking fast, fast, fast. You need to go to the back seat, scoop up those little pieces of brain and skull. Get it out of there. Wipe down the upholstery. For the upholstery, it doesn't need to be spick-and-span, you don't need to eat off it. You just need a good once-over. What you really need to take care of are the really messy parts. The pools of blood that collect, you have to soak those up."
"And Himeko." He turns to her once again. "We need to raid your linen closet. I need blankets, I need comforters, quilts, bedspreads. The thicker, the better. No whites, we can't use them. We'll need to camouflage the front seat, the back seat and the floorboards with quilts and blankets, so if a cop starts nosing around in here, a subterfuge won't do but at a quick glance the car will appear to be normal." He then heads to the front door. "Himeko, lead the way. Ladies, get to work." It was all set and ready to go, now the plan had to be done and-
"'Please' would be nice."
Ratio turned around, revealing Stelle to be the one talking. "Would you care to repeat that?"
"I said a 'please' would be nice." She repeated, much to the chagrin of March, as she looked like she was about to smack her.
Ratio's gaze narrowed, almost offended as he approached her. "Get it straight, idiot. I'm not here to say please, I'm here to tell you what to do." Seeing the pause from the two, he continued. "And if self-preservation is an instinct you possess, you better do it and do it quick." He sighed. "I'm here to help. And if my help's not appreciated; lots of luck, ladies."
"No, no, no. Mr. Ratio." March swooped in in an attempt to save the conversation. "It's not like that, your help is very well appreciated."
Stelle joins him to explain herself. "Mr. Ratio. I don't mean disrespect, okay? I respect you." She ignores March rubbing her face in second-hand embarrassment beside her and continues. "I just don't like people barking orders at me, that's all."
The man remained unimpressed but still responded. "If I'm curt with you, it's because time is a factor. I think fast, I talk fast, and I need you to act fast if you want to get out of this." He takes one more sip of the coffee. "So pretty please, with a cherry on top, clean the fucking car."
As Ratio leaves, March nods at her orders before she glares at Stelle.
Stelle glances back. "Don't look at me like that, I can feel your look, alright?"
A/N: I know, I know, I'm late. Kudos to those who get the reference.
Actual Chapter 6 is in the works, don't worry.