The lightning that repeatedly flashed across the sky was the only thing illuminating the farm aside from Charlotte's flashlight. Thick raindrops pelted against her hood, amplifying the drumming in her ears caused by the wind. The path to the chicken coop wasn't far - she knew her farm like the back of her hand – but her choice of shoes wasn't exactly helping her navigate the slippery cobblestone path. Sebastian's sneakers were already completely soaked, and she could feel the water squishing inside with every step.
At least it wasn't cold. On the contrary, the storm had cooled the sweltering air to a pleasant temperature – but the wind, which still mercilessly whipped through the treetops, urged Charlotte forward. It wasn't far now. She kept putting one foot in front of the other – until her left foot missed the next stone and slid sideways into a muddy puddle. She flailed her arms, trying to regain her balance. But the next gust of wind took her down, and she landed hard, one hand sinking into her tomato field.
She already suspected that her foot might have taken some damage, but there was no time to dwell on that now. She tried to push herself up and keep moving – until a sharp pain shot from her outer ankle, past her knee, and into her hip. She groaned, inhaling and exhaling deeply.
"Charlotte!" she heard Sebastian call from behind her, followed by the sound of his hurried footsteps.
"Watch out, or you'll…" Charlotte started to warn him, but Sebastian was already there, gripping her firmly by the waist. He pulled her up slowly and turned her toward him, scanning her with concern.
"Are you okay?" he asked, glancing down at his sneakers, now completely ruined by the mud.
Charlotte nodded reflexively but then motioned toward her left foot.
"Help me walk." So, Sebastian wrapped an arm around her shoulders and helped her cover the last few meters to the chicken coop. He pushed the door open with one hand, and the wind immediately flung it wide – he could only hope he hadn't accidentally hit one of the chicks. Out of habit, Charlotte reached for the light switch, but of course, nothing happened.
They hurried to close the door behind them, and Charlotte swept the flashlight around the coop. The chicks must have hidden themselves away – there was no sign of them anywhere. She directed the beam toward a pile of hay in one corner, which looked like the most comfortable spot available.
"We can sit there. Just… don't sit on a chicken."
Sebastian almost laughed at the remark - if he weren't still supporting Charlotte. He only let go once they reached the hay pile, watching as she shrugged off her rain jacket before carefully lowering herself onto the straw. He followed suit, making sure not to crush any hiding chicks beneath him.
Charlotte inhaled sharply as she pulled off her left shoe. She knew this feeling. She quickly removed her socks as well, which, along with her jeans, were soaked all the way up to her knees. Sebastian focused on her ankle, carefully propping it up on more hay. In the flashlight's glow, it did seem more swollen than usual. He frowned, his expression tense.
"Seriously? You're uncomfortable with me sitting here without pants? In your body?" Charlotte asked, amused.
Sebastian shrugged. "I don't know - wouldn't you be?"
Charlotte let her gaze sweep over him.
"Honestly, I'm more uncomfortable seeing you sitting there in MY body, completely drenched. At least take off the shirt unless you want pneumonia by tomorrow."
When Sebastian hesitated, Charlotte sighed and pulled off the dry hoodie she had been wearing under her raincoat. She still had a shirt underneath. She handed him the hoodie.
"At least now my sweating all day in it wasn't for nothing," she remarked, watching him without embarrassment as he stripped off his soaked shirt and pulled the dry hoodie over his head.
"Why were you even wearing it if you were so hot?" Sebastian asked, frowning.
Charlotte shrugged. "It's kind of like your uniform. I didn't want to stand out. At least… not more than I already do." A crooked smile spread across her face.
"I swear, Jodie has never scrutinized you as closely as she looked at me today – she's probably wondering how the hell you managed to pull me."
Sebastian let out an awkward laugh and searched the coop for the chicks.
"They're okay, right?" he asked, clearly eager to change the subject. It didn't quite work the way he had hoped.
"They'll come out once we start talking a bit," Charlotte said, keeping her eyes fixed on Sebastian. "Sam confessed that he has feelings for me," she stated bluntly. Sebastian froze for a second but didn't look at her.
"Hopeless idiot," he muttered, swallowing hard. Charlotte grinned.
"Oh, you know - if it weren't for Alex..." she began, but Sebastian cut her off.
"I don't care."
Surprised, Charlotte looked at him. He finally turned to face her, glaring in annoyance.
"Stop talking about my best friend like that." It sounded more like an order than a request – and the anger Charlotte had been swallowing down so successfully surged back up like bile in her throat.
"Oh? Should I start yelling again?" Her voice left no doubt that she would do it in a heartbeat. The lightning that flashed across the sky at that moment, briefly illuminating the coop like daylight, only emphasized her point.
"Yes!" Sebastian exclaimed – but then glanced at his hands. He hesitated for a moment before sighing deeply. "No," he said eventually, looking back at Charlotte. "I'm sick of fighting with you all the time. It's not getting us anywhere."
But Charlotte wasn't about to let him off the hook that easily.
"Then apologize," she demanded.
Sebastian's eyes widened slightly as he met hers. Her eyes left him no other option. When he didn't say anything, she pressed on.
"We've already established that whatever happened between Abigail and me – or rather, you – was a misunderstanding. What I still don't get is how the hell you thought getting that wasted was a good idea." Charlotte shook her head.
"Dear Yoba, what do you want to hear? I wasn't thinking at all. At first, I didn't even plan on drinking – but I threw that plan out the window pretty quickly. It only got really bad when I saw you and Abby together. And from that moment on, everything became too much. I couldn't think straight anymore, I..." He sighed and continued in a quieter voice, as if it were a secret that no one but them should hear. "...I lost control."
Charlotte had been ready to get angry again, but the expression on Sebastian's face was so honest that she couldn't bring herself to do it.
"I get it. It was a lot," she admitted, and they sat in silence for a moment.
"Can I ask you something?" Charlotte and Sebastian spoke at the same time. "You don't have to answer if it makes you uncomfortable…"
Charlotte let out a short laugh, but Sebastian spoke first. "You go first. Please."
"I saw that you've been looking for jobs in Zuzu." She studied him carefully in the glow of the flashlight.
"That's not a question," Sebastian noted, his expression immediately growing more tense as Charlotte brought up the topic.
"So what do you want in Zuzu?" she asked bluntly. "Don't get me wrong – I loved that city for a long time too – but compared to everything you have here, it doesn't even come close."
Sebastian let out a sarcastic laugh.
"I live in my parents' basement – in a tiny town that no one outside of it even knows exists. I never went to college, I can count my friends on one hand, and now I'm stuck in the body of the most exhausting woman I've ever met. And by 'stuck,' I don't mean the good kind of stuck."
Charlotte smirked. "I'm not that bad."
Sebastian looked at her and grinned. "Yes. You are. You're uptight, perfectionistic, overly ambitious – and unless someone's name is Alex, you couldn't care less about them."
Charlotte flinched, and Sebastian immediately realized his words had hit harder than he'd intended.
"Sorry, I…" he started, but Charlotte shook her head.
"I really was pretty... unapproachable, huh?" she asked, thinking about how she had never wasted even a fraction of her energy getting to know Sebastian before suddenly waking up in his body.
"Well, it's not like I made much effort either," Sebastian admitted, studying her. "And to be honest, you've proven to me – very convincingly – that you're a lot more capable than I gave you credit for. I looked at the code you wrote."
Charlotte raised an eyebrow. "That was my job," she pointed out. Then she cleared her throat. "The one you're planning to apply for, by the way."
Sebastian nodded slowly. "I know," he admitted, tilting his head slightly. "I googled you."
Charlotte's eyes widened. "You did what?" Her voice was higher-pitched than before. Sebastian, however, didn't give her a reason to freak out.
"Honestly, I think it's weirder that you didn't google me," he dismissed it with a wave of his hand. But Charlotte didn't let it go.
"And what did you find out about me?"
"I found your job profile. Pretty impressive – great degree. No idea why you threw it all away to move here, though."
Charlotte glanced down at her foot, which she could practically see swelling before her eyes. She needed to cool it down somehow but there was nothing here except Sebastian's wet shirt, which would turn lukewarm in no time.
"Sometimes you have to make decisions that only make sense to yourself," she murmured.
Sebastian nodded slowly. Then he heard rustling in the hay and soft chirping. The chicks didn't dare come out of their hiding spot, but at least Sebastian knew they were safe. As him and Charlotte sat there, side by side, their faces illuminated by the flashlight and – for once – not fighting, he thought to himself that he could get used to this. It would be even better, though, if he didn't have to keep stealing glances at himself.
Lately, he had caught himself staring into the mirror a little too long, memorizing every detail of Charlotte's face. And unlike what he might have expected, it just kept looking more beautiful to him.
He thought about how he had seen himself in the mirror before Sam's party – and how he had almost taken a picture, just so he could remember what she looked like when he was no longer trapped in her body. But today, when he had been concentrating on not dying in Charlotte's bed, he found her old Social Media Profiles – and he discovered photos that showed that she used to dress like that… often. Short dresses, tight shirts, sheer tops – Charlotte used to be a whole different person, no doubt about that.
A thought shot through Sebastian's mind, one he tried to shake off – but the uncertainty of it weighed so heavily on his chest that he simply had to ask. The mere possibility that his downward spiral had hurt more than just her reputation made him feel instantly sick.
"I...," he began, but he wasn't sure how to put it into words. "I didn't snoop through your stuff or anything..."
Charlotte watched him intently. Sebastian briefly closed his eyes and took a deep breath.
"I found a token in your jacket. From the Zuzu Unity Service."
Charlotte's face instantly lost all color. A shiver ran down his spine as his worst fear crept in. Could she really be...?
"It's not mine," she said shortly.
Sebastian exhaled in relief. But when he noticed that Charlotte beside him wasn't relaxing at all, his pulse refused to calm. She was staring at her hands.
"It belonged to my brother." The silence that followed was deafening.
Sebastian didn't know what to say. He felt awful - not just because he had unintentionally pushed her into telling him this, but also because looking through her online profiles now felt like a violation of her privacy. Worse than showering in her body.
"I'm sorry," was all he could say.
Charlotte nodded slowly. "Thanks."
He hadn't expected her to say anything else, but then she turned slightly toward him, careful not to put weight on her foot. "Eric was my twin brother."
Sebastian thought back to a few photos he had seen on Charlotte's profile. The guy with the curly, reddish-blond hair had caught his eye – the green-blue eyes, the crooked smile. At first, he had assumed they had been a couple. Looking back, he wanted to slap himself for that unnecessary jealousy. Her brother.
"Our parents got divorced when we were ten. It was a nasty battle. Our dad was a major shareholder in Mum's company, and when she wanted to leave him, he swore to ruin her along with the business."
"That sounds completely illogical."
Charlotte let out a sharp breath. "No kidding. It made no business sense whatsoever. He already had his issues – but when Mum filed for divorce, that was it. War broke out. And Eric and I were caught in the middle." She let out a bitter laugh and glanced at Sebastian, who was watching her silently.
"I'm not telling you this because I want your pity," she clarified. "I'm telling you this because we're stuck here, my foot hurts, and you just looked like you were about to throw up again when you thought I was a recovering alcoholic you had successfully pushed back into addiction."
Sebastian swallowed. "I didn't…" he started weakly but fell silent when he realized she had already seen right through him.
"Anyway, from that point on, everything at home was pretty much wrecked. I threw all my energy into school and sports. And for a while, that worked for Eric too – until we got older and he discovered Zuzu's party scene. Or rather – we did. We were always right in the middle of it."
Charlotte looked him straight in the eyes. For a second, Sebastian wanted to look away, but he forced himself to hold her gaze. She was being completely honest with him right now – he could feel it. And he didn't want to risk losing her trust just because he didn't know how to handle the moment.
"We were always together – until we started college in different cities. I stayed in Zuzu – he moved away. And from there, things went downhill. He was already... deeper into things than I was. For me, alcohol was enough to escape everything happening at home. Well. Alcohol and men."
Sebastian's stomach clenched.
"But Eric... that wasn't enough for him. And when I wasn't there anymore to look out for him, that's when..." Charlotte's voice broke. "I realized far too late that he was destroying himself. Yoba, I didn't even have control over myself."
"But you noticed," Sebastian stated, thinking of the token. Thirteen. Charlotte nodded.
"I noticed. And at first, everything seemed to be okay. I went to a support group with him. He didn't see the point at first, but I just joined in, and together, it worked. It didn't hurt me either. I had plenty of my own problems. But then I had to go back to Zuzu for my degree, and we promised each other we'd stick to the program. And we did. For thirteen months."
Charlotte felt silent tears running down her cheeks. When had she started crying?
Sebastian kept watching her, unsure whether he should pull her into a hug – afraid of ruining the moment. But the urge to do something was too strong. Carefully, he reached for her hand – his hand – and was relieved to find that, in the darkness, it didn't feel nearly as strange as he had feared.
"What happened then?" he asked gently.
"Then I left him behind. I went on vacation with some friends. From the start, I had a bad feeling about it, but I convinced myself that Eric was strong enough. After all, we'd only seen each other on weekends for over a year. I just wanted to feel... free again."
She took a shaky breath.
"They found him in a club bathroom. Overdose. After thirteen months of being clean. Thirteen months... because I wanted three weeks of freedom. I left him alone - and it killed him."