In the darkness, my fingers traced out the shape of you
I can still vividly remember that silhouette.
And every time I encounter something I can't come to accept
Nothing wells up but my tears
What were you doing back then?
What were you looking at?
with that turned-away face that I could never comprehend?
Kenshi Yonezu - Lemon (english translation)
The first thing he blearily notices is the explosions and the screams of the people around him.
Armor. Black and gold. Red and Black.
It was familiar somehow…
crack!
The hair on his neck raised and his body moved on auto-pilot, blocking the killing blow meant for his chest with a strike of his own. He knew this battlefield.
He could not ponder on that thought for long before another attempt at his life is made. He could barely dodge. this was his first campaign - the battle of the shores, where they had fought against the ninth brigade of the black dragons..
next, an axe would be aiming towards him. He jumped before his ankles could be cleanly cut off. his feet landed on the handle to kick his attacker away.
he whirled around when he felt a shadow moving behind him, swinging his own black silvered Buster sword- Rampage to cut them down-
ding!
that sound-
His silver steel stills right before it touches the slender neck. "Oh my, that could have been really dangerous, Kei~" a mischievous grin spread on his lips. the beauty mark at the corner of his right eye crinkled with the movement as the veil waved in between the ash and wind.
ding!
it was-
"tora..?" his sword dropped to the ground and pulled the omega towards himself hurriedly before he could be harmed. with the wedding gown, he was not appropriately clothed to be in the midst of battle. "get behind me" he had to get the omega away from harm, his alpha was screaming at him.
A snort reached his ears. the omega's head leaned towards his ear, his lips brushing his skin when a breathy whisper reached him "it is too late for that"
the ground beneath them shifts, and his surroundings turn darker. Baji takes a moment to realize he's no longer on the battlefield. instead, he's greeted by an office, destroyed beyond comprehension. ripped curtains and books lay scattered on the floor.. a corpse still bleeding on the carpet.
But against all the blood, it was the scent of bitter lemons that filled his nose first.
too late he noted, that his own fingers are squeezing something-
his whole body freezes over when he catches wide, gold; frightened eyes staring up at him, tearing up at the corners as frail hands claw at the hand still mercilessly squeezing his throat shut.
horrified, he tries to let go but instead, his grip tightens around the omega's neck. "K-Keisu-ke, i-it hurts"
finally, after an eternity his hand loosens and both of them crumble to the ground. the omega immediately scrambles away until his back meets the bookcase behind him with a thud. "Kazutora, I-" Baji takes a step forward. he had to make it better, his bonded was hurting-
"g-get away from me" the omega's hoarse voice whimpers, one hand clutching the bloody side of his tattooed neck -where had the blood come from? while the other shakily points something at him-
the dagger from then..trembling in his bloody hold "…y-you're a monster"
"t-tora, I.." his words died in his mouth as he caught his own reflection on the blade
Paralyzed, he remained rooted to the spot. that couldn't be him-
a grotesque inhuman being, with bloodied, razor-sharp canines protruding from his bloody, still smiling lips, his face covered in small scratches matching the blood underneath the omega's fingernails- he felt sick
he looked down to finally see his own hands were replaced with claws, dipped in red, as warm drops slowly dripped down to the carpet underneath-
…what had he done?
"y-you promised you'd never hurt me" the omega accused with so much betrayal in his eyes, tears streaming down his face; his bloodied hand falling from his neck to show a mangled neck with visible teeth marks- the inked tiger was no longer recognizable. "look at what you did"
bile rose in his throat, tasting copper on his gums as he choked "I-I'm so sorry, tora-"
"…sorry?" the omega sounded the words out, like he'd spoken a foreign tongue, his eyes devoid of light "yeah.. I'm sorry, too" before a laughless smile stretched on his lips, the dagger that had pointed towards Baji just seconds ago flipped around- the alpha's stomach plummets to the floor at the realization-
"Kazutora, don't-!" he runs but it feels like he is wading through the thickest of swamps as the omega slowly moves the dagger to his neck-
just like he had back then, only this time Baji was unable to stop him from cutting a jagged vertical line - one end to the other.
the only sound his ears catch is the small thud! of a body hitting the ground in front of him as the blood reaches the tip of his boots.
"Kazutora, no no no no-" he's on his knees cradling the cold, cold corpse of his bonded, blood is seeping through his fingers. no, this couldn't be- we were supposed to make it this time
His breath hitched, the voice in his mind a foreign one. His face turned to the open door.
"you-"
A masked stranger leaned on the doorframe with crossed arms and clicked his tongue in disappointment. "you took too long" the wolf-shaped mask flashed as the room lit up with the crash of thunder. Blazing eyes of crimson flashing with it.
wha-
something cold touched his cheek and his eyes snapped wide open to the concerned expression of his wife hovering above him
"huh?" is the only thing that comes out of his garbled mouth
Kazutora blinked at him with a worried expression before his face turned more neutral with an eye-roll, making him wonder if the previous expression had been there at all. "even in sleep you make a ruckus, huh?"
"..did I wake you?" the alpha's scratchy voice echoes in the quietness of their chambers as the back of his palm wipes down his sweaty forehead.
"hardly, I've been awake for a while now" Kazutora replied wrily, passing a pitcher of water to him. The pinched expression didn't lessen when he took it. "thanks.."
"for what" Kazutora raises an eyebrow at his unusual behavior.
"nothin'"
the omega only huffed, "you were beginning to stink up the room though. I guess I should be happy you didn't swing a fist at me like you did last ti-" turning to Baji to mock him further but is startled when the alpha unexpectedly traced the column of his neck with concern. the unwilling goosebumps that followed with a shudder had him slap the alpha's hand away in fear of him noticing his reaction.
the hand fell away with a mumbled apology, but it was the unreadable expression on Baji's face that made him pause. normally this would make Baji just double down on his teasing. but he was startled when within a heartbeat Baji was standing- announcing he had somewhere to be and left out the door still in night clothes.
Kazutora looked at the closed door, regret washing over him for his unwarranted harshness. His head fell back on the cushions, he turned his face to burrow his shame into the bedding. and when he took a deep breath or two to take in the lingering scent of pine trees and smoke, then that was between him and the cushions only.
Chifuyu blinked several times… and nope the picture did not dissolve. the recruits were on the brink of death. he'd been told, the commander had arrived shortly before lunch in a terrifying mood, his scent presumably making at least three of the newbies faint. the alpha had cut short their meals before they could even begin eating and forced them into a harsh training session that had transformed into a one-man battle against anything and anyone.
the Lieutenant hadn't even been gone for that long. when he'd gone to order new gear at the blacksmith, he'd left the commander in his office, where he was supposed to do the rest of the budgeting for this moon. It's not as if he'd forced Baji-san to write out the holy books. He was good with numbers (most of the time) so a build-up of this much frustration was utterly unwarranted. the last time he'd seen a scene like this had been in the first years of their campaign against the south..
one of the recruits tapped him on his shoulder, whispering with horror "what is going on with the commander?"
"I though with a wife in his arms, the better mood would be permanent" Chifuyu raised his eyebrow at the cheek of one of the gutsier recruits. but before Chifuyu even had the chance to scold him-
"If you have so much time to talk you can do twenty more drills!" the commander barked, making the small group disperse with a terrified "Yes sir!!"
but Chifuyu had to agree with them, what had caused such a change in his boss. "You too Chifuyu!"
"Huh?!"
To say Kazutora was adjusting splendidly would be a flat-out lie now that the novelty of the first few days in the northern part of the country had worn off.
Especially after the discovery of Baji having information on him that he had not previously shared spooked him. He had done nothing about it that night, letting the alpha take his debauched self back to their chambers with hopefully nobody noticing. (He knew he'd been purposefully touchy with his husband to get a rise out of a certain housekeeper, it did not mean he wanted to venture into exhibitionism outside of that)
In the following weeks, he'd tried to gouge the extent of the alpha's knowledge but came up woefully empty, not only since the alpha was particularly great at distracting him from his objective. It had been so frustrating, the only one who'd succumbed to talking was Kazutora himself, as he got side-tracked with other more enticing things.
not to mention now that he had given up on that battle plan, he realized something else entirely. he had tried to make his peace with the fact, that the North differed much more from the South than he'd initially thought. And it was not only due to the weather.
Though the 'little bit of a breeze' as Baji called it, was testing his limits daily. If this was a breeze, he wasn't too keen to find out what the alpha considered proper wind or god forbid a storm. the ones so far had been considered mild by Baji's and his Lieutenant's accounts.
The novelty of snow had long passed as well and he longed for the warm sun rays bathing his skin in the flourishing blues of the southern rivers. if he were to try dipping his foot here into any water mass he would turn into an icycle. He couldn't believe he'd wished for snow but a couple of weeks ago..
And the clothes! He was forced into layers upon layers of scratchy clothing, that was actively trying to suffocate him. A fourth of it was his fault for the nonexistent mating bite. so he was forced to bite the bullet with that one.
He'd known that the further north the regions were, the more covered up the people would be. It only made sense. However, he'd clearly underestimated how uncomfortable he'd feel in them. It was difficult not to squirm and suppress the need to scratch his neck at every shift of his surcoat.
It picked at his skin, thousands of ants crawling all over him, his arms, his legs, his back it felt like. It turned his stomach and he was on the verge of ripping it all off of himself. But he'd find pneumonia here if he dared to even remove one layer of these cursed stuffy and constricting garments.
He sighed looking at his sleeves, chastising his own silliness for obsessing over something so minor. It was only clothing after all.
And he really didn't want a sickness to force him to lower his guard around a flock of strangers, that he didn't know. not to mention the maiming he would receive for a fraudulent marriage if anyone were to discover the secret.
He had to quickly learn, that an Omega was not meant to walk without a chaperone, for one. it was similar to the South, but he'd been ignored the first third of his life, and by the third, he'd already learned how to get to and away from anywhere without somebody hovering behind him. The first time he'd decided to explore the castle walls of Herald alone had caused mayhem. While he'd been strolling through the more unused corridors, reports said that the maids and footmen were running up and down the floors in search of him, screaming about his disappearance.
In the two hours he'd been gone, intricate rumors spread first of him running off with a secret lover- which was just rude, where was he to get a hidden lover in the north? he didn't even talk to anyone outside of Baji for more than a couple of pleasantries.. and what need did he have for one? Baji was quite sufficient in his husbandly duties as well, so there would have been no need to-
anyway, then there had been a rumor containing a kidnapping of his person. One anonymous person yet to be located- even swore up and down, that they'd witness a mysterious person taking his unconscious and battered body and disappearing into the woods, never to be seen again.
Still blissfully unaware he had come back from a supposed kidnapping, confused at a search party being organized to find him. A frantic lieutenant had noticed him first and run up to him with a face of alarm and frantically asked him if he was hurt and where his wicked assailant was as he checked him for injuries that did not exist before laying in on him like a mothering hen of all things.
It took several minutes of back and forth to clear the misunderstanding and then Matsuno's irritation was directed at the conspicuously quiet staff members, who in his humble opinion were responsible for the whole thing. Of course, the witness of his abduction remained silent as well.
They'd been lucky the Duke had been away on a visit to the outskirts of the city walls, Sato offhandedly mentioned later on in the evening, continuing that 'he'd have ripped out the tongue of the offender, had he been led to believe his better half was possibly in any sort of danger' Kazutora only had scoffed at his exaggeration, pointing out that blowing things out of proportion was obviously a trend in this place.
Sato had spent the rest of the day swearing up and down that Baji Keisuke was in fact the kind of person to do that. Kazutora had no problem believing that, as he'd heard quite a few stories of the protectiveness when one of the alpha's own men had been in danger. It was rather the fact that he'd go so far for Kazutora of all people, that he did not believe. They had not known each other for long enough to warrant that disproportionate of a behavior
a part of him still felt like if he were to bet gold (if he actually were to own any, curse the alphan patriarchy) his honorable husband would be secretly euphoric when he'd finally be rid of him. it wasn't anything in particular, but he'd noticed the alpha turning more and more antsy and jumpy around him, clearly uncomfortable with his presence. he must be growing sick of him already..
even if the alpha acted like nothing was amiss and acted normal after such reactions. but Kazutora didn't fault him. After all, the alpha was the unfortunate collateral in this forced marriage his supposed friend had forced him into. the crown prince's move continued to remain a mystery in his eyes.
Thinking of Baji, the only saving grace was that his husband didn't hold the northern customs in the same regard as his subjects, merely lifting one eyebrow at the staff member informing the alpha of his wife's escapades in a fashion that very much spoke 'what do you want me to do about that?' (which secretly made Kazutora preen like a cat, that had gotten the cream. he'd almost stuck his tongue out like a little kid at the offending party) before turning to him and halfheartedly requesting that he'd at least inform someone when he excused himself from his quarters the next time so that he'd be properly accompanied so as not to cause any more of his workers to walk into their early graves.
and unlike Kazutora the stiffening staff members of course understood the underlying message for what it was. One more mishap concerning the duchess and their heads would be rolling. The omega in question remained unaware as he begrudgingly agreed and promptly retired back to his very own observatory talking about a constellation he'd seen with a humming duke accompanying him. He also remained blissfully unaware of Baji turning his head back to them for a second with a stare so cold and furious, that the staff on duty still had a slight tremble in their limbs for weeks after.
This whole ordeal seemed to have made him even more popular with the waiting staff. He received scalding looks for the sole reason, that his dukeness hadn't bothered to punish him accordingly (and had directed his irritation towards them instead) as he was unanimously chosen as the sole perpetrator for his inability to abide by a simple custom.
And the obsession with punishments? he'd thought his own sire was bad, but these people were trying their hardest to match him. He had yet to figure out whether they wanted him to get in trouble for the sole reason that he was not a northerner and dared to marry the land's warden or whether it was because he was from the treacherous isles, not to mention the clan that had caused one of the greatest wars in recent history.
He had a hunch it was a combination of all.
Most of them averted his eyes, which was fine by him. He wasn't a fan of eye contact either. And it wasn't like they were trying to get close to him. it wasn't even amusing anymore to pick a fight with Baji either. As the whispers of his insolence grew in number every time he so much as breathed wrongly towards him.
("an Omega is not supposed to defy their spouse"
"How dare this outsider question his grace's command"
"he should count himself lucky, the duke even graces him with his attention")
for a day, he'd tried to agree to every word of Baji's to see if they'd get off his case then. The only thing he got though was an increasingly alarmed Baji, asking him if he'd fallen ill or eaten something funny and a new wave of whispers along the words of "look at him, being the perfectly submissive spouse. How are we supposed to serve under an omega, that cannot even assert themself?"
He tried to not speak at all, but that did not sit right either, as now he was upsetting them by "-acting like he was better than everyone, not bothering to even utter a word when talked to"
Weirdly enough only Miss Chiyo seemed to have nothing to say to him at all since that initial week of back and forth.
He tried at least for Baji's sake to remain respectful, so as to not alienate the man from his own people due to his unfortunate connection to him, but everything Kazutora did, backfired splendidly. So he decided then and there to wash his hands of the matter as it was not worth the trouble any longer and kept to his quarters. If he wasn't there he wouldn't be able to step on any toes and Baji wouldn't be troubled due to him.
That meant he wouldn't be able to visit the observatory, which bummed him out a bit (it wasn't really that great anyway with several chaperoning footmen breathing down his neck, he consoled himself)
He was used to being alone, so it didn't matter that Baji had been working a lot more lately and avoiding him. The alpha couldn't annoy him, if he wasn't really here, so if anything Baji was doing him a favor by staying away. it was a two-for-one deal, right? He ignored the slight pang of discomfort in his chest, blaming it on the lunch he hadn't actually had.
confining himself here in front of the fireplace with a thick blanket to stave off the cold, was hardly any work he reminded himself. He had worse growing up. And better yet, he didn't have to wear as many layers.
yet still it felt as if a time-stopper was placed on him. The hours would just not pass.
He spent the hours watching the fire dance and that should be enough, right? There used to be times when he wished for a life like this, doing nothing and just lying down, not having to think.
the wood in the fireplace continued to crack and burn away and Kazutora remained where he was, watching it.
Chifuyu slowly saunters over to his commander after he narrowly escaped the punishing drills. "sooo…"
"what." Baji-san barked, eyes blazing with anger, his arms crossed. Chifuyu stopped to take him in. his complexion was more flushed than it should be. the cold did not bother the commander nor did the heat residue that came from his fire affinity, so that was out of the question as well. neither was the duchess here, the only other source, that had that effect on the alpha. The alpha's scent, too was all over the place.
"I remember leaving you to finish the funds for this moon, Baji-san" he remarked playfully.
"finished it. the crop estimates for the next two moons are done as well" Chifuyu's jaw hit the floor. what?! he'd given him the task for the remainder of the week, not for a single day "wow. I mean- that's great!…" he trailed off. his eyes flickered back to the whimpering recruits, then back to the commander's hunched shoulders. maybe he was getting sick? "Baji-san, are you alright.. you've been acting kind of off these past few days.." he trailed off.
"have been feelin' kinda weird lately" came the admission. it was honestly more than Chifyu had expected him to say. "how so?"
"what are you, my mind-healer?" the alpha growled.
yikes. must be worse than he previously thought. even Baji seemed to realize it, as he grimaced, sighing loud. "I might be experiencing some.. frustration lately"
"frustration..?"
"the type of frustration where just the wrong word sets me in a rage.." Chifuyu would wager that it wasn't just the wrong word, but just the wrong breathing pattern might do the trick. the question was to what extent "especially when I'm surrounded by dumbfucks who'd rather laze around than do their fucking jobs-" woah. there seemed to be a lot of built-up tension there. "Agh… I feel like I might snap at any moment" Baji-san said in a resigned tone. Once more he looked at him. The clammy skin, the clenched fists-
one of the recruits tripped and dropped a stack of weapons and Chifuyu took a respectful step back knowing the fuse that was about to blow "-fucking kidding me!" as he continued to stare at the enraged expression, pupils almost turned to slits and his canines…
ohhhh. the puzzle pieces fell together.
"Baji-san.. could it be.. that your rut might be coming up…" he trailed off.
Baji stopped in his tracks-
ruts. yeah, he was supposed to get those once in a while, wasn't he? he hadn't had one since he presented. but with Kazutora here, it was bound to happen, wasn't it? his mind supplied. fuck. shit.
the dreams that had haunted him lately, had they been a premonition of what he'd do? was he capable of such an atrocity? the haze he found himself in whenever he got too much of his pheromones, yet he still felt like he was starving for it - no matter how much Kazutora would give him, his greedy alpha would always crave more.
and if he was acting like this in his presumed pre-rut, what danger would he pose to him when his rut actually arrived? the volatile nature of his instincts was a powder keg, bound to blow up in his face-
"It's good that you're mated, right?" like a bucket of icy water tipped over his head he remained frozen for several beats before he realized he'd stopped breathing altogether...
just when it had become rarer for Kazutora to put space between them to keep his guard up and remain vigilant. the omega had flip-flopped between gluing himself to Baji or not coming into a ten feet radius of him and he'd taken it in a stride.
Kazutora's first instinct would always be to pull away and Baji couldn't fault him for that, so he remained patient and close until his wife gravitated back to him.
And he always did.
They hadn't been married for long, but it fascinated the alpha how Kazutora closed the space between them unconsciously and Baji would be damned if he told him that. The omega would make sure to keep at least twenty feet away from him if he became aware of it. Baji didn't think he'd be able to stomach that at this point. though lately, a newfound sense of distance was building due to his own fault no less. the dreams had shaken him more than he'd like to admit
and now the rut.. it could not have come at a worse time.
It seemed to have been the wrong thing to say, Chifuyu realized. Baji didn't even reply, his whole body going rigid as he nodded stiffly, his gaze yards away. He tried again "it's good that you have your wife, right?… Baji-san?" after all, unlike the rest- mated pairs did not have the usual issues that came with Mating cycles. having their mates close regulated most of the outpour of pheromones, their mere presence a balm to any discomfort they might feel.
Baji barely heard what the blond had said, his mind far off, calculating how much time he had to do damage control before he turned Kazutora into accidental collateral because of his idiocy "hm? yeah, right.."
Chifuyu could smell that something fishy was going on with his commander, but didn't want to press the issue further as the alpha already looked agitated enough and gave him an out "…maybe we should cut the training session for today?"
the alpha blinked back into reality when the words finally registered and cleared his throat "These fools can't even hold a sword properly, the north would be invaded in mere seconds, if I left them in charge of anything.." it sounded a bit rattled, but his mind seemed to have checked out of the conversation for the day completely only hanging onto the last strings of it to not alarm his Lieutenant.
"good that we aren't then, right? with me and you, Cho-san and the others… and even Ryusei, the fate of the north is in good hands" Chifuyu cleared his throat "however, for them to actually be of use, we cannot force them to learn in days, what took some of our best years to master-"
"hm?.. uh, yeah we'd be lucky if they managed to win a fight with ten years worth of skill behind them"
"c'mon the sun has already departed for the day. and cut them some slack, Baji-san. not everybody can be a prodigy like you or the other commanders." he placated, ignoring the man's unusual answers.
Baji-san seemed to want to argue before his mouth closed again, mulling the words over. finally, he then relented "you're right, let's stop for today"
Chifuyu could hear several people fall to the floor with relief.
"-zutora" something touched his shoulder making him jump out of his skin with a curse.
"I take it you didn't hear me?" the familiar rumble of Baji's voice hit his ears before he even had the chance to recover. "you think?!"
"Occasionally" the alpha rolled his eyes "why are you here in the dark with no light? and why is the fire out? No wonder you complain about the cold-" Kazutora quickly realized that evening had fallen and was dumbfounded as he looked around the room. How could the day be bidding its goodbye already?
As if on cue, his stomach started growling, stopping Baji in the middle of his berating. Baji looked at him and Kazutora vehemently averted his gaze and decided to ignore the betrayal of his own organ.
"Did you sleep through supper?"
"..maybe" Baji was already on his way to the door by the time he'd finished his question, so when he'd reluctantly answered Baji was speaking to a footman Kazutora couldn't make out. at first, he'd thought the alpha was leaving again and that didn't sit right with him.
"food should be here in a bit"
But instead of leaving the room altogether or coming back to the loveseat, Baji went over to the fireplace and took some of the ready-chopped wood, throwing it into it before snapping his fingers, a ball of fire bursting forth right into the center of the fireplace.
For a moment Kazutora was forced to close his eyes, as they had yet to adjust to the sudden light. Squinting a few times he became aware of the fact that the alpha had taken the liberty to light a few candles in their vicinity before settling next to his own curled-up form on the loveseat. Like this, his feet were forced to touch parts of the man's thigh. with a shudder, he realized how cold his toes were with the furnace of a man next to him.
He had half the mind to scoot over to give him some space, but a part of him felt very reluctant to put that thought into action. Baji did run pretty warm and Kazutora did feel cold, so it was only plausible to use some part of the alpha's body heat to his advantage. At least until the fireplace warmed up the rest of the room again. It was hardly the first time, anyway.
Baji jumped at the contact, his newfound hyperawareness concerning the omega's touch eliciting a strain on his instincts, he wasn't the only one who took note of his reaction. the fact that his wife didn't immediately pull away from the contact was pure luck.
In apology, Baji took the omegas freezing limbs into his lap, before his wife was given the chance to jerk away. He felt how his bonded's body uncurled and relaxed back into the seat. He tried to ignore his alpha and the growing feeling of unrest in his bones. the dream had rattled him, but it was only that. a dream. nothing more.
He knew the omega was giving him that sweet expression that spoke of befuddlement and irritation, but Baji's gaze remained fixed straight ahead toward the source of fire and he began heating his hands. As long as he didn't make a big deal out of it, the tiger wouldn't either, he was sure of that.
And lo and behold, his wife's body let out another shudder and went limb without further argument. He could hear the small sigh of content that unintentionally escaped his lips and Baji bit his lip to hold himself back.
It was hard, not to seize the rest of the omega's limbs and carry him over to the bed and warm him up in a different way. It was comical what grip a small sigh had over him. He had to stop before he did something he could not take back.
but it was easier said than done. when it came to Kazutora, the tiniest of movement had him on his knees. A small tilt of his head, tucking a hair curling behind his ear, not to mention when his breathtaking eyes crinkled in amusement and Baji was a goner. And he knew that his wife was painfully unaware of the power he had over him.
He was never one to be caught dead lusting after the fairer designation, but the presence of Kazutora alone taught him all kinds of new things about himself. the omega had opened new doors for him that night in the observatory. and gods was he thankful for that. so thankful in fact, he gave his gratitude to the omega every night and even day, if Kazutora was willing. He could not get enough of him. he swallowed. and he wondered where the timing of the rut was coming from.
right now, too the omega had it out for him- the serene expression on his face, eyes closed and lips parted slightly. His head was softly cushioned by the pillows behind him. The blanket had slipped halfway to the floor when Baji had pulled his limb into his lab and now he had the perfect view of his exposed collarbones. He thanked the gods beneath his wife had unconsciously taken pity on his soul and chosen to open most of his upper half.
He was very much a fan of the Southerners way of exposition and dare he say it was always a treat, to ogle admire the ink swirling just perfectly downwards towards that delicious chest and consequently had his teeth itching to bury themselves there and mark every crevice-
he stilled, anger filling him. what was wrong with him? to dream of it was one thing, he had no control over that but while wholly conscious? It was a wonder the control of his scent hadn't slipped and given away just what he'd been thinking. maybe he was underestimating the stage of his pre-rut. could he stop himself if it came down to it?
Look at what you did, flashes of bloody, marred skin, the same words repeating over and over- you promised you'd never hurt me!
the omega's terrified voice resounded in his ears and would not stop haunting him since he'd awakened. Baji could not allow his instincts to make him lose his grip on his composure. he bit his lip, he would never forgive himself if Kazutora became collateral to his feralty.
a sigh brought him back "why did'ya stop"
the pout on the omega's face dispersed any further spiraling thoughts "I apologize for denying the duchess his deserved pats" The quip rolled off his lips with a smile as he continued caressing his knee with heat and the scathing expression on Kazutora's face was all the more worth it.
still.. there were more pressing matters at hand. his wife had been alone in the dark with nothing but a freezing room giving him company. and not even a meal to his name.
war prisoners in the capital had received better conditions (and Kazutora had been one of them) than this and that fouled his mood all the more. he'd love nothing more than to march outside and punish every last one of the staff members for their insolence, but he knew as soon as he did, Kazutora would be upset with him. out of a false sense of responsibility, he would probably blame himself and shut himself off even further than he already had.
He knew he had trouble adjusting to the north, to his new life and he thought giving him time and space to familiarize himself without Baji breathing down his neck was the best route of action.
And in the beginning, it had seemed to work. Ryusei told him in passing that he'd seen him explore some of the floors, the library, and to Baji's utter delight the observatory just one of his favorite places to spend his time in.
But over mere weeks, his wife got out of his rooms less and less, favoring his quarters over the rest of them. He'd considered calling on his mother at first. But she would only be a temporary solution to his troubles and he needed something more permanent to help Kazutora's declining mood.
The workload that had been piling up in his absence was not giving him any favors either. It was as if fate was actively working against him. Something had to change and it had to quickly. He'd promised Kazutora he'd take care of him and he intended to keep that promise. and now the fucking rut coming up. if he had to take all the suppressants in the world for that, then so be it.
"What is with the sour expression lately?"
His head snapped back to Kazutora. One of his eyes had opened as he mustered him, the dull gold in his iris giving none of his thoughts away. Baji continued stroking his ankle as he contemplated his answer. He couldn't tell him of his rut-
that wouldn't be fair to him… but he couldn't lie either. "just thinking"
"Gods above help us- ow!" Kazutora glared at him for pinching his leg. He should have thought twice knowing his limbs were held hostage by Baji.
"..you've been oddly quiet today. Has something happened?"
"No, nothing at all. A lot of letters to respond to. A lot more papers to sign" he bemoaned. at least that was not a lie. he skimmed over the more pressing matters "just a lot of boring work to go through and Chifuyu won't let me in the training grounds until I'm finished with'em" and maybe because he'd made some of the new recruits cry blood. but that was neither here nor there.
Kazutora heard him mutter something about respect and who was the boss of who here. "Being the paramount liege of the North seems to come with a lot of bureaucracy" he mused out loud.
"No shit... If I have to read one more letter about the estimated crops for Turnips today, I'm going to light this whole castle on fire. I wish one of the tribes down the river would start some trouble at least then I could spend my time in a good old brawl instead of behind a desk"
of course, he'd want to have a full-blown fight with the fifth.
"Mhm.. sounds tough. I take it you're not to keen on the more mundane part of the job then?" he'd guessed as much when he'd disturbed him several times in his office.
"You have no idea! I don't mind getting my hands dirty and doing the heavy lifting. Hell, I would rather crop the turnips myself than have to read one more letter about it.." Kazutora did not doubt it. It was amusing to think of the fearsome northern leader surrounded by turnips as he worked the fields away. "Is my peril amusing to my wife?"
"A bit maybe.. the thought of the Bloody Hallow working through a field of turnips does make a fetching image- Your enemies would quiver in their boots"
He was awarded with another pinch just for the stupid moniker alone. This time to his thigh. He tried kicking him in retaliation, but Baji was holding his leg hostage rather successfully.
But he was able to make him shift his position at least a bit. not to his advantage though as the alpha was partially hovering above him now. His stomach started tingling at their shift in position. The energy in the room charged with something.
"I would make a great turnip farmer"
"I'm afraid with your temper and lack of skill, your subjects would be left with no turnips this coming season"
"Maybe my skills are put to better use in a different department" He shivered at the gravel in the alpha's voice. The space between them was slowly declining. The scent of pine wood enveloped him.
"hardly" he replied breathlessly, his face flushing. He didn't sound all too convincing and by the smug smile Baji was giving him, he convinced no one. He was unable to break eye-contact and noted in fascination the pure hunger radiating in his husbands half lidded gaze. Their faces were barely inches apart, their breaths mingling. "I believe my expertise is being put to question here"
His breathing hitched as his heartbeat came out faster. He could barely muster an affirmation. "that won't do" was whispered into his ear followed by a sharp bite to his earlobe. Kazutora had a hard time suppressing the sound coming from his throat as Baji ruthlessly descended to the juncture where his neck met his shoulder and began sucking and biting marks into his skin, recoloring his fading marks.
He could do nothing bad take it as his husband had successfully bracketed Kazutora beneath him. His hands were skillfully unraveling his scornful layers to give his lips more access to the rest of his skin and he took the opportunity to move downward to his exposed chest.
The hot flesh of the alpha's tongue enveloped his right nipple and Kazutora keened, his back arching, giving his hands no choice but to find purchase clutching the head of the guilty party, whose smile stretched onto his flushed skin before he immediately went to work tormenting him.
It was difficult to focus, the alpha's touches seemingly everywhere at once, soft caresses to his side, then one daft hand began ruthlessly pinching his unattended nipple and Kazutora had to bite his fist so hard, he broke skin, when a hand suddenly took a hold of his hand, moving it above his own head.
"I'm working so hard, and you deprive me of the reward that is those sweet sounds coming out of here " Baji tapped the omega's lips with his finger. It took a moment for the words to register, his breathing was still too heavy and his glassy eyes had trouble focusing on the heated gaze of ruby eyes. Baji let out a soft curse as his eyes took his disheveled form in.
"That's rather cruel of you, dear wife"
Between heaves of breaths, he tried to protest "The whole castle is gonna hear" The alpha seems rather dissatisfied with that answer as his thumb caresses his bottom lip before slipping inside, giving way to another small moan as the omega instinctively closed his mouth around the digit and sucked on it. He watched Baji's irised dilate, his thumb pressing down on his tongue. Kazutora had trouble swallowing his spit at the alpha's ministrations, some of it trickling down the corners of his mouth. The digit slipped out of his mouth with a small string of saliva still attached to it.
He should have been grossed out, wiped his mouth, and shoved him off of him, but by the dear life of him, he couldn't help but anticipate his husband's next move. it sent a thrill down his spine.
"It seems I am doing a poor job if my wife still concerns his mind with other people"
Kazutora felt his stomach swoop when the alpha pulled him further down by the hips almost onto the man's crotch. His hands made quick work of his breeches and before he could even make sense of the situation he was in nothing but his undergarments,
Kazutora's chest kept rising and falling as if he'd been fresh out of a marathon but he was not allowed to collect himself, his husband's thigh knocking his own apart and with one quick move, the thin fabric was the only thing between the toned thigh and his pulsing core and his mouth opened in a silent moan.
Up until now, he hadn't realized how soiled the fabric had become. Embarrassed, he tried to close his legs in another jerky motion, but of course, the alpha intercepted him again. He took his left thigh and put it over his shoulder, making his garment ride further up. Any more and he would be on full display with how close the alpha's face was. He could hear him take a deep breath in.
He tried not to squirm too much, to ensure it wouldn't ride up even higher. His cheeks were aflame at the thought of Baji's face inches apart from it.
"Divine" And then his mouth bit into the meat of Kazutora's thigh and he had no choice but to let out a scream of the alpha's name. His tongue relentlessly suckled on the sensitive skin and Kazutora's hip bucked up. He didn't know whether he was trying to get closer or further away from his tormentor.
after every sharp bite, in a display meant to be soothing, but was anything but a sweet kiss followed almost in apology. If anything it just made the itch worse, as his husband decidedly touched him anywhere but where he needed it most. He let out a whine, the next time his husband's breath ghosted over only to land on the juncture of his hip, sucking another mark into his skin.
"Look at you"
He could barely make out what the alpha was murmuring, he seemed to be stuck in his own world. A soft pillow was placed under his lower back, alleviating his hips, into a more comfortable position as the ministration stopped. He whined helplessly, wondering why his husband was inclined to torture him today.
He was on the verge of begging, but Baji beat him to it.
"I'm going to ravish you" his voice sounded barely constrained, desperate in a way he hadn't witnessed before.
This was hardly their first tumble, so Kazutora was rather surprised at his current state as his eyes landed on his face. He looked like a man left to die in the deserts between the third and second district. His eyes were wild, and his tongue came out to lick his lips as if there was nothing to quell his thirst, he had to look away, and the intense gaze burned into his memory. It was too much right now. "..Baji" he couldn't help but plead, after all. He just needed him to touch him.
"only my family name?" Baji clicked his tongue before leaning over him again, yet he did not touch him still. Kazutora whined in protest, but the alpha would hear none of it- "how can I continue when I am addressed so unfamiliarly"
It was hard to understand what he wanted, but that didn't stop his toes from curling and more slick from spilling out of him.
He didn't know what his husband was trying to ask for but it didn't matter. He couldn't wait for him to pick the right words. This desire was holding him by a string and he needed his husband to cut him loose already. "B-baj-"
the corners of Baji's mouth turned downwards in disapproval and Kazutora went silent, his lips clamping shut. alpha was not pleased with him he realized with growing distress. "I-i" his voice cracked. w-what had he asked of him?
a soft caress to his cheek had him lean into the touch as his eyes darted up to meet the alpha's own soothing one.
a sudden knock shattered the moment. "Excuse me, you grace. The food you had requested is ready. "
All color drained from Kazutoras face. Oh fuck. They had heard everything went like a loop around his mind as he covered his face with his hands in mortification.
before he could sluggishly shove Baji away, the man was already standing with a rigidness in his shoulders. his eyebrows raised in surprise, he'd expected him to simply ignore the staff and insist on continuing. he'd done so before. he looked down, trying not to read too much meaning into the alpha's deliberation to get away from him.
Instead, Kazutora placed his focus back to where it should be: putting on some semblance of clothing, but to no avail. His movements were too sluggish to be of any help in dressing himself. He had a few whispered choice words with Baji while at it.
"This is your fault! I told you to stop. I can never show myself outside these halls again-"The fallen blanket was wrapped over him, covering everything but his head.
"..they didn't hear"
A cough from outside begged to differ.
"oh gods" he buried his head in his blanketed knees. He prayed a a hole would open up right under him to swallow him whole.
"Let me rephrase that" Baji said taking a lock of the omega's hair and about to caress it between his fingertips before dropping his hand altogether with a step back. "They didn't hear if they know what's good for them"
"stop threatening them!" he slapped his shoulder. "they are trying to do the job you gave them, you ass! and put your shirt back on" Baji just rolled his eyes, but began dutifully righting his own clothes before putting his attention back to the door.
he sat back down after much deliberation. this time with enough space to fit a whole other person between them. this time it became more difficult to not read too much into it, the unsettling sensation in his stomach growing. look, he cannot stand to be near you
"Fine. Come in"
Painfully awkward the door opened to one of the younger staff members, a Beta girl, in her teenage years he hadn't met yet, with obviously reddened cheeks and eyes averted to the floor pulling a cart with different types of food items to the table Kazutora was sitting behind.
The only thought going through his mind was that he'd just traumatized a child.
But to her credit, she continued to diligently fulfill the task of putting several food options on the table. The clinking of dishes and cutlery being placed is the only sound in the room. When she straightened she spoke for the first time with a nervous smile. "I hope the meal is to your liking"
Kazutora didn't know if he'd be able to stomach anything right now but gave her a nod and a small thanks, that sounded painfully awkward to his own ears as she began putting away the lids into the card. She just smiled at him. Baji on the other hand didn't seem to have a shameful bone in his body as he promptly put some food on one of the plates.
He gave him the biggest side-eye for his inability to wait until she'd left and he was gonna whisper as much, but as he opened his mouth a piece of bread was forced into it. Almost choking on it, he was left with no choice but to close his mouth and chew.
The man looked at him innocently, like he hadn't just almost choked him with the loaf in his hand, and held the next piece dunked into a brown broth ready to most likely continue the experience.
Kazutora very much wanted to kick him, but for that, he'd actually have to remove the blanket currently upholding his nonexistent virtue and the girl's mental health. If it had been one of the old hags that loved badmouthing him, he would have had no issue sending her into cardiac arrest and exposing himself, but alas here he was, playing house with a man, who deviously toyed with him any chance he could get to irritate him.
A giggle brought him out of his musings and his eyebrows raised in confusion at the girl's display of emotions. The Northerners he'd met until now tended to go about their life in a constant bad mood or at least in front of him, keeping a stony expression as they went about their work. so this was rather curious behavior. Mayhaps he'd made that much of a fool of himself today that the girl had no choice but to laugh.
Baji on the other hand had a rather exaggerated reaction to it. Any hint of his prior calm mood had vanished and a look so seething it could send a weaker person into begging for their life had replaced it. "Is there something amusing to you, brat?"
A look of horror crossed the girl's face "No! I just-"
"just what?" Baji didn't let her off the hook, his voice growing darker and darker. The girl clearly was intimidated by him and Kazutora didn't know why the alpha was so hung up on putting the fear of the gods into her.
the girl flinched and muttered something in a small voice
"speak up"
"stop it, Baji"
But Baji refused to remove his gaze away from her. The girl took a deep breath "I-I thought that you were…a good match? I'm very sorry for offending you, your grace!" She bowed so deeply her head almost connected to the floor. Kazutora had to blink a couple of times at her muffled exclamation.
Hang on, what?
He looked at Baji, wondering if at least he'd heard correctly, but the man had a curious glint in his rust-colored eyes. "why is it you think that?"
"stop harassing her"
"I- I do not wish to overstep" she hesitated once more.
"You already did. So continue"
"Baji, you can't just-"
Her face turns into a cherry. "..the bickering!"
Both of them turned quiet. "…what?"
"y-you reminded me of the way my grandparents showed their affection to one another.. sharing food, teasing the other… I thought it was nice…. your graces" She looked at the ground trembling like a leaf.
Kazutora felt numb. "You probably have a lot to do. We shall not keep you any longer"
He couldn't recognize his own voice. Is that how they looked on the outside?
"Again, I apologize for overstepping. I'll collect the dishes later. I-I'll take my leave now"
Kazutora couldn't bring himself to look at either of them, ignoring the effect her words had had on him. She was just a child. She only saw what she wanted to see. There were no such things between them. His chest squeezed tightly but he paid it no mind.
He could make out the quiet dismissal that Baji gave to her and the door soon closed.
"..you should eat" He didn't argue and even let Baji continue feeding him, a sudden exhaustion blanketing him. He'd barely done anything, he had no right to feel any tiredness. He took a few sips of the glass in front of him and coughed at the burn it left behind in his throat.
"Careful. Too much of the ale and your head will be spinning"
How pathetic. Baji brought another spoon to his mouth, but Kazutora refused any more food, citing that he had eaten enough. the alpha frowned but didn't press him. "what are you doing these days?"
"Nothing much, what about you?" he eagerly asked right back, a small part of him hoping the alpha asked to spend time together.
"I'll probably have to finish some paperwork until midday.." Kazutora hummed in answer, masking the growing disappointment with another chug of the burning beverage. "there is also this annoying expedition coming up"
"expedition?" he hoped Baji didn't notice the disappointed sound of his voice. he had no reason to act like this. the man had a duty. he couldn't diddle-daddle the whole day like the leech Kazutora had turned into.
"there was a monster attack a few days ago. I'll have to ready some men to depart one of the villages north from here. probably a breach of the borderlands. I'll have to take Ryusei with me"
"why not Lieutenant Matsuno as well? they just reunited" he pointed out.
Baji looked at him with a raised eyebrow "One of them has to stay here in my absence… what is the sudden interest with the two of them?"
"they are quite the pair don't you think? they clearly like each other" he said with a small laugh, going for another sip. The ale was not so bad.
"oh and what would you know about that?"
"I'm not blind Baji, I can tell when one person likes another" he huffed.
"could've had me fooled" Baji grumbled into his palm.
"what?"
"nothin" Kazutora frowned at the lackluster answer, he probably did not want to know anyway. first, he was in desperate need of a bath.
He stood up from the loveseat and promptly regretted it as his legs almost gave out beneath him. "easy there" Baji sat him back down. He stared at his offending limbs for a long time.
but Kazutora had no energy left to argue it so he went in the complete opposite direction. What did that girl say about a doting spouse? One evening of acting like a needy wife couldn't hurt or maybe it was the ale speaking.
"Take responsibility. I am in desperate need of a bath" he pouted with grabby hands towards Baji, who was dumbfounded for a moment before he quickly recovered, a marveled expression sporting on his face. "gladly" he picked him up in one sweep motion, causing the blanket to fall once more.
Kazutora shivered when the fresh cold hit his exposed thighs and arms, goosebumps forming. Baji quickly heated his own body and watched in pure fascination as his wife buried his face into his chest.
"Are you going to just stand?" was muffled into his shirt. He began chuckling before he took his time walking over to the enclosed bath. It wasn't every day that his adorable kitten was so generous with his affections. and whose fault was that?
He quickly dismissed the unsettling thought and instead admired the marks decorating the omega's body both in pride and shame of his actions. his alpha preened at the marks that decorated his wife's skin, but the part of him that was not clouded by his instincts yet knew that if it hadn't been for the interruption, this might have ended so badly for him.
he took note of the Red spots on his arms, and back, that looked to be some type of rash. His fingers barely grazed the spot. they looked like an allergic reaction "What are those?"
"Hm?" He pointed at the spots to show him. "Oh that? nothing to worry about, they should be gone in a fortnight"
"Yeah but what caused it?"
"Mhm.. my skin's not taking to the northern coarseness" his sleepy voice muttered.
He looked at him questioningly, waiting for an answer as the omega finally slipped into the bath with a content sigh "probably the clothes I've been wearing. like I said, it's nothing to lose your mind over. It comes and goes"
That didn't sit right with him at all. He'd have to ask Ryusei what type of materials were usually worn down South. but the fabric would be unfit for the northern climate.. but then again, those rashes couldn't be comfortable in the long run. Maybe it was best to contact Mitsuya and commission some clothing. if anyone had the skill, it would be him.
Kazutora tugged at his cuff expectantly, tilting his head to the side with a pout, his cheeks still prettily flushed from the ale. he didn't even have that much. It took every fiber of his being not to bite one of them. "What are you waiting for?"
"Hm?"
"Aren't you getting in?" this day was truly testing him. It kept just giving him one crisis after the other. "I don't think that's a good idea right no-" he never got to finish that sentence as Kazutora yanked him right in. Water splashed all over. For someone so sleepy and scrawny, he was left to wonder where the sudden strength had come from as the water seeped through his clothes. the only thing spared was the clothing beneath his knees which was to say not much as his legs hung over the edge.
"see? that wasn't so hard" but the omega didn't care for his flabbergasted expression and simply made himself comfortable. "can I at least remove my clothes?"
the omega looked positively irritated at the thought. "no."
"no?"
"no." Baji quickly realized this was one of the few battles he wouldn't win. funnily enough, they all seemed to have the same thing in common he noted as the omega forced him into a position that benefited him best only. in the end, he did let him remove his wet clothes not without grumpily complaining though.
For a long time, they just lay in the water, reluctant to move. Baji absentmindedly caressed Kazutoras back as the latter went in and out of consciousness. a soft vibration made him halt. speechless he realized unaware that he started to purr.
That was one of the major reasons why Baji was so reluctant to part from the embrace. It was an honor when an omega chose to purr in front of someone. And Kazutora, who didn't give an inch on a good day, to be so forthcoming was something he was reluctant to part with.
But it would be cruel to leave him in the bath just so Baji could enjoy it a bit longer. He slowly began gently cleaning up Kazutoras body, mindful of the rashes, he then continued with rinsing his hair off any dirt, knowing the earful he'd get from the tiger for this.
He chuckled at the thought as he quickly cleaned himself up with less care than he'd had for the omega. He left the tub in search of robes and a brush and after slipping one on himself then more gently he began to brush the omega's hair, which he unconsciously leaned into.
Kazutora's hair has grown longer, he noted as he carded one of the hair oils through his hair, his mind wandering back to the snowy forest
He shook his head, drained the rest of the water, bundling the omega in the other robe to shield him from the cold, and went back to the sleeping quarters.
The fireplace was still alight and the room was freshly aired it seemed as if there was not a trace of the late meal on the table.
He gently placed him into the pillows, before getting him one of the softer nightgowns to wrestle him into. Let it be known that even in slumber his wife was a remarkable match as he held his jaw, where Kazutora had hit him just seconds prior.
With a caress to his cheek and a quick kiss to his temple, which made the omega grumble but at least not retaliate. Baji tucked him in, before going around and putting out the still lit candles. Then he too finally retired to bed.
Kazutora rolled over to him in his sleep, his hands and feet freezing and Baji immediately dragged him in closer to become his heater as the omega tugged himself into his side with a sigh. He watched his sleeping face, again astonished by the effortless beauty of the omega in his arms. He too should probably sleep, exhausted yet the land of dreams took its time claiming him.
Kazutora mumbled in his sleep. He noted it the first time it happened weeks ago, when the omega had been similarly exhausted but he hadn't been really sure if he'd been imagining things but this time it was unmistakable.
"n-no stop" his chest tightened as the words slipped out of him. "it hu-urts, pleas-" it was as if the world had come to a stop in one moment, and in the next everything was crashing around him. Surely it wasn't- but the words that left the tiger's lips were revealing enough. He helplessly listened, static filling him as every word washed over him
"-ather please…'m sorry"
"-on't do it again, pleas' let m'out"
"it'scary an' dark, 'want Momm-"
"-s cold, i'm sorry pleas-" Every tidbit the omega ever fleetingly mentioned had been a secretive joy to the alpha up until now. but listening to his helpless mumblings..
Baji had been through many brawls in his life. He faced thousands of men. Against popular belief, he learned many things as well. the ability to turn his own energy into Fire for one. It had been a lot of trials and even more errors before he'd been able to conquer it. Little burn marks littered most of his hands and arms, each a reminder of his frustration, but they had been a mark of pride, too. Though it had hurt and there had been times where he cried tears of frustration and pain, he'd gotten back up and tried again, but-
but..
no fight, no injury had ever been capable of striking him quite like this. His eyes were stinging, unconsciously squeezing his sleeping wife closer to himself. A whine of discomfort from the omega's throat startled him aware of his shameful actions. get a grip on yourself
Baji's arms released him jerkily. the omega did not deserve to be hurt for Baji's pathetic lack of control. Breathing heavily, he looked guiltily at the ceiling, unable to turn his head back to the sleeping form on his chest, no capacity left in him to ensure his most inner instincts would not overwhelm him. He could not afford to become a source of fear to Kazutora because his instincts got the better of him. and with his current state, Baji did not know what would be left of himself if that scenario came to be.
"-'m all di'ty, I'll hafta clean up"
"…f'ther'll be furious if I stain'..-e floor"
He'd never understood what Chifuyu and Emma spoke off when discussing their romance novels, spouting about what it meant to devote oneself to a person, that even the possible threat of distress to them could become a source of heartbreak to oneself. Though here he was now, not even splinters left in his chest to salvage his cursed organ. He wondered if that was all he was capable of.
"s'much, too'much"
He'd been unable to help him then. That did not mean, he had to just let him suffer through the aftermath all alone. Baji took a controlled breath, then another just as he'd been forcefully taught after he'd lost control the first time. His pheromones turned from oppressing to a more calm and balanced scent. With a much better grip on his instincts, he finally dared to put his palm back on his wife's back. If Baji could help Kazutora even a shred of his existence, he'd give it all up. Baji would dedicate the rest of their lives to aiding his wife in whatever way was needed of the alpha for Kazutora to enjoy his lifetime to the best of his abilities. "..I'll help you clean."
"mhm'you will?…- tol'em stop"
"..that was very courageous of you, tora"
A much more quiet tone "don'wanna be touched..but they won'listen.."
"I'll make'em stop, okay?" This time Baji was unable to stop the hitch in his breath, making his voice crack by the end of his sentence.
"you'll ask'em to stop?" the omega's voice was so innocent, like when he'd been a child and asked him to help him get a book he couldn't reach. it gutted him. he was much too late to be of any use now, but still Baji could at least give him this.
"..I'll make sure nobody touches you again"
"m'kay.."
The day began strangely.
When he'd woken up, Baji was still in bed with him, dark circles surrounding his eyes, and still in their chambers, instead of his office like he said he would be. Weirder even, when he'd questioned him, the alpha just deflected from it, citing that missing a bit of paperwork was not the end of the world as his fingers fiddled with Kazutora's earring yet again.
His head was still pounding from yesterday's ale so he didn't have the energy to argue with him. "How are you feeling?" that question too was asked so delicately, Kazutora wondered what was up with the alpha today.
"Fine? honestly, what's gotten into you today..stop being weird"
"that's g-good… good that you're fine, I mean" Kazutora raised an eyebrow in suspicion at the avoidand disposition of the man next to him.
Kazutora huffed, not patient enough to wait for his husband out on it. He crawled over to him and the man was so deep in his funk, that he had yet to react to any of Kazutora's movements. Before he could second guess himself, the omega hooked his leg over and promptly sat on the alpha's lap. startled hands shot out immediately to steady his unexpected movements. The alpha looked at him in befuddlement and Kazutora knew it. Normal Baji would have already seized the opportunity to get between his clothes.
But then again, the alpha had been doing a lot of things he didn't understand lately. even the way he was being held by the man was awkward. His hands were more of a hover than an actual grip. a stark difference from the alpha that hadn't stopped clinging to him when he'd shoved Kazutora onto his horse on their way to the Holy Lands.
Kazutora should have a hard time getting his lecherous hands off of himself in fake indignation just to be difficult. Yet here they were. This man, seriously? This type of behavior would have been befitting when they had been sharing their first night. But of course, the man had been anything but back then.
Was he compensating for the lost opportunity to do so now or had something crawled up his ass between the time Kazutora fell asleep last night and woke up this morning. he cannot stand you, he ignored the whisper in his ears, instead, he chose a different route. Kazutora hated guessing games and the alpha had been trying him with his behavior so he grabbed the man's head and forced him to meet his eyes. Usually, it was Kazutora who fought tooth and nail to avoid eye contact. But today he would beat the man at his own game. With no way of escape he was left with no choice but to look at him.
"What is it?"
He watched as Baji took a deep breath, but no words followed. Still unable to speak, the alpha defeatedly dropped his head on Kazutoras shoulder his arms curling around the omega. It took him a couple of minutes before began speaking softly."nothin'"
he huffed "Really?.. fine be like that then" he brushed the rejection off and got out of bed quickly. clearly, his offer was unwanted. he averted his gaze, stretching, to remove the kinks in his muscles.
"what are you doing?"
"start my day? Now get dressed and get to work. you've overstayed your welcome"
Baji spluttered.
"Ah before I forget it" Kazutora fumbled with his ear before he could second-guess himself, throwing something in the alpha's direction. the small ding! echoed through the room as the man caught it with a dull thud- he looked down on his hand to see the shimmering gold of Kazutora's bell earring. "since you seem to be in one of your weird moods again" the omega teased, his smile strained. "but don't forget-"
"it's just a souvenir. I remember"
"g-good. you can hold onto it till you are back from your little expedition"
a warm pair of arms coiled around Kazutora's waist. he suppressed the shiver that threatened to leave him as Baji's hot breath blew against his now bare ear. "what are you doin-"
"we're not leaving for a while yet. Are you trying to get rid of me or something?"
"oh? Didn't I tell you about the lover I hid under the bed-eehk!" maybe it was in Kazutora's mind after all he thought with a laugh as he tried to escape Baji.
"my mother wrote.." Baji jumped with the distorted voice, turning to see a person with long golden hair in front of him. Their face was difficult to discern, it was like a drape was placed over his eyes. but when he looked anywhere else, his eyes remained clear. "they want me to come back to be crowned queen"
"congrats, you'll be finally upgrading from princess to queen" Baji could hear his own lips move as the words were spoken in a joking manner, yet he could sense the incessant ache in between his rips as well. the feeling that only ever came with loneliness. don't leave me he wanted to say to the faceless stranger he'd never met before
"that's not all" the blonde swallowed "they want me to be married before the summer is over"
he felt physically ill at the revelation. yet again the words that came out gave nothing of it away, going for another joke instead "so what? you can just best the final participant like you did all those other times"
the blonde did not laugh "I'm not a child anymore. I can't act as I did when we met. there will be no tourney this time"
He couldn't shake it. the feeling that he was losing him forever. "oh. Maybe that's for the best. it was high time you went home where you belong anyway. getting yourself in unnecessary danger for wars that were not your own was irresponsible of us. you and --ru--yo got injured needlessly"
"you're not going to do anything" the blonde realized, his hand dropping as anger filled him. "so that's it? You have nothing more to say to me?" he scoffed, not quite able to hide the sorrow in their voice and Baji couldn't fault them.
"we have a duty to our kingdoms. you to the Floating Land just as much as I do to my kingdom. we cannot do as we please, you know that" he reminded stubbornly.
"spare me your cowardice, --isu--" the blonde said in a condescending tone "and don't you dare insinuate that I take the duty to my own kingdom half-heartedly"
"I wasn't insinuating anything! Don't twist my words around-" he could feel his own frustration swelling.
"save it. you've clearly made your decision so there is no need to argue further" The omega turned on his heel walking down the path and away from him.
"where are you going?" he demanded.
"I'm just doing what you told me. I'm going home where I belong" the blonde sneered.
"don't be childish. Ma--ro and the others are waiting-"
"tell them I had to depart early. we all were going our separate ways after tonight's celebration either way. after all, we all have our duties to fulfill, don't we?" Baji didn't like the feeling of his chest being ripped open by this person. his feet quickly followed him. "--zu--ra! I won't allow you to just leave-"
"who are you to tell me what to do? last I checked I was not one of your subjects nor was I of any importance to you"
"you know that's not true-" the alpha reached for him but the blonde slapped his hand away, unshed tears in his eyes "There is nothing more to say, right?"
say something, you fucking idiot Baji wanted to scream. can't you see, he is waiting for you to say it! but the body he was in remained silent and any vulnerability that the omega had displayed turned to indifference with the next blink of his eyes. "goodbye King --isu--. let's not meet again"
and he watched as the omega turned his back to him for the last time. he tried to grab him once again. he had to stop him before he'd lose him forever, but just as he was about to touch his shoulder, he didn't notice his elongated nails and the blonde tried to side-step him. instead, the southerner's shoulder blade came in unfortunate contact with the northerner's sharp nails as he tried to slide away. The omega let out a hiss of pain, and three long red lines trickled down as the blonde's previously white and gold tunic colored with blotches of crimson.
both of them turned to the shallow wound with shock. the blonde's expression quickly washed away with fury. "I'll go get to Ta--shi, he'll be able to heal it-"
the blonde laughed humorlessly "Funny you mentioned getting injured before when the only one hurting me is you" he recoiled with the words. "and I am in no need of your help. In fact, I would appreciate it if you don't touch me at all"
don't say that- don't look at me with those eyes—
with a sharp intake of air, the alpha jerked awake, finding himself once more in his office.