Bella spent most of her day in the Cullen living room, with Esme bringing her drinks, snacks, and meals on an elegant hardwood tray. There was hardly any conversation between them, as Esme seemed elsewhere, likely listening on whatever discussions were ongoing upstairs—discussions Bella couldn't hear.

Esme eventually handed Bella a remote for the television, and then sat herself on the loveseat with a book. It was clear: they weren't meant to talk. Not when Alice was here.

Bella debated heading home, but she had agreed that her father would pick her up on his way back from work. So she attempted to keep herself busy with daytime TV, and the collection of novels she found tucked into the bookshelf in the corner. She was yearning for any sort of distraction she could settle on, any method to reel in her mind.

It was late in the afternoon when the front door opened and Rosalie and Emmett strolled in, hand in hand.

"Oh, your ring has dulled," Rosalie noted immediately, her beautiful golden eyes softening on the diamond upon Bella's finger. "I can polish it, if you'd like."

No, hello, or how have you been, or it's been a while.

Wordlessly, automatically, Bella slipped the ring off her finger, and extended it out to her. Any bride-to-be would at least show a little hesitation when parting with their ring, but Bella had lost all patience for such deception.

"We should keep it clean and sparkling, shouldn't we? Edward appreciates the attention to detail," Rosalie said, plucking his ring from her palm. "He's back Monday, right?"

"Yeah," Emmett said, lowering himself to sit next to Esme. He gave Bella a tight smile. "Hey, I saw your dress."

"Ah, yes. It's hung up like a ghost in the basement," Rosalie muttered, making her way to the stairs. "I suppose your tailoring won't happen until after you're changed."

Emmett tracked his mate as she disappeared upstairs, and then turned to Bella. His mouth parted, but nothing came out, his head tilting to the side as his eyes unfocused. Esme, too, was listening.

Naturally, after all of this time, the eeriness of this failed to bother Bella. She only opened the book in her lap, finger poised on the paragraph she had paused on.

"I heard the vote was tied," Emmett finally said. "Is that why Carlisle's staying the extra week?"

The vote, Bella knew, was for the human pets legislation. If the vote passed in favor of it, covens would be legally permitted to keep humans as a secured, reliable source of food.

Esme nodded. "Just one more week, yes."

Just one more week.

The words landed heavily, dragging Bella to depths she couldn't swim out of. She was drowning with the notion that time was ticking away, and she was powerless to stop it. When the room fell quiet once more, she felt like letting out a scream, if only to break the suffocating silence.

Was Alice still here? Would she even continue her discussions with Jasper when more of the Cullens were around? Would she allow anyone but Bella and Jasper to even see her with how red her eyes were?

And then Bella realized she was gripping the edges of her book hard enough to ache her joints. Because Jasper was descending the stairs.

Emmett immediately got up, nodding at Bella in farewell. "Overdue for a sparring round. It was nice to see you, Bella. Don't be a stranger." He then told Jasper, "I'll meet you there."

And then with a rare demonstration of vampiric speed, Emmett was gone.

Jasper stood by the stairs, crimson eyes flicking once to the ceiling. Bella could deduce that it meant they weren't safe to speak. But then he came forward and paused before where she was seated.

That was when Bella noticed that he had something in his fist.

"I was ordered to return a ring to you," he said.

When he revealed his palm, it wasn't just the ring that Rosalie had just taken from her. Beneath the diamond and platinum—polished and gleaming—rested a folded piece of paper.

Bella tentatively reached up at the same time he lowered his hand, grabbing the offering. "Thank you."

Jasper wasn't there when she looked up next. Dropping the ring on her book, she unfolded the note. And only one word greeted her, written elegantly at the center:

Dusk.

It was a little before dusk that Bella reached their meeting spot at the clearing. She preferred to make the short trek with the last few rays of sun guiding her way. And she found that Jasper was already there.

"She shouldn't have been able to get that close to you," he was saying, his feet pacing rhythmically back and forth. "The bikes. It was Esme's lapse in judgement."

When Bella had returned home with her father, the two dirt bikes poised in her backyard had disappeared. But the relief she felt now dissipated. Yes, Alice had to have been right outside of her window to place those bikes.

How close had Alice truly gotten to her?

She shivered, crossing her arms, securing her coat more firmly against her body. "Did you know about all that she's been sending me?"

"Not until today."

"I didn't know about Maria either," Bella said tersely, "not until today."

The statement hung in the air for a while, but Jasper seemed entirely unbothered, his steps not faltering for a second as he went from one edge of the clearing to the next. He was moving quickly enough that he blurred every so often in Bella's vision.

"Jasper," she said quietly, her breathing uneven, her eyes aching with moisture. "Please talk to me."

"I need you to tell me something," he said suddenly, coming to an abrupt halt. "Tell me you aren't falling for Alice's bait. Tell me that you hear her words, but know they are utter bullshit."

"She is a threat. You told me so."

"She is. But there are two storms she's unleashing on you. One mental, and one—" He shut his eyes, and sighed. "You can't fall for it."

Bella wiped at her eyes, the wind harsh against her cheeks. "Why don't we just be honest with each other?"

"I have never lied to you, Bella."

"Please."

"You've already fallen for it," Jasper said, and Bella couldn't stand the accusatory tone directed at her. "Alice is adept at unadulterated manipulation, and when her plans don't seem to be going the direction she wishes, she will pivot. When she realized you didn't want to change, she had to pivot. When she realized you weren't interested in mating with Edward, she had to pivot. When she began suspecting something between us, she had to pivot. And now, she's resorting to psychological games to get you to cave."

"Is Maria her latest psychological game?"

Jasper released a harsh breath. "Maria is a double-sided bait. The quicker Alice can relieve me of my legal responsibility to you, the better for her, so she needs me to seriously consider this proposal. But there are intricate details to this process that we must discuss. The dissolution of my agreement with the Cullens would take a court hearing, and Maria's presence in the courtroom. There are a lot of conversations to be had about the timing and validity of my case against Maria's. Thisis what has been keeping Alice busy. This is what has kept her with me, and not with you. I just need to keep her distracted enough until—"

"Until Carlisle returns?" Bella supplied thickly. "We need to be honest with each other. Please. We need to speak clearly."

Jasper only stared at her.

"Alice wants you gone," she continued helplessly, "because it's the only way she can get me alone." And this time, Bella was the one to start pacing. "You told me that Alice was drinking from humans when we were in Seattle. That was her latest pivot, wasn't it? We just hadn't realized it. Or, maybe you had—I don't know, because you don't talk to me, Jasper. You tell me you don't know what's happening, and then you tell me you have suspicions, but you never talk to me."

Jasper's eyes narrowed, tracking her closely. "I have a reason for not telling you these things."

We don't say things that might put the other at risk.

Bella sighed sharply, her frustration bubbling beneath her skin. "Alice is drinking from humans, her eyes are getting redder, and redder by the day, and then she turns one of her victims. She unleashes a newborn in Forks. Was it by accident?" she challenged. "No. No, Jasper. She was practicing. She was practicing because she pivoted, because she wants to kill me."

Jasper shook his head, but it didn't sound one bit convincing when he distantly said, "She would be violating her coven rules."

"Not unless Carlisle approved," Bella pointed out. "Not unless Carlisle allowed her to do it. Stop making me say this. Stop making me say this when you know exactly what she plans to do."

"Bella, you need to stop."

"How can I? How can I stop when I know Alice has to get this done before Carlisle gets back? She has to have me on the brink of death, and as long as my heart beats long enough to pump the venom through, that's enough. So maybe she'll toss me off a cliff, or push me down a mountain, or rip the brakes out of my father's car—anything to get me hurt enough to warrant Carlisle's fear of losing me entirely. Alice would need to persuade Carlisle to let her change me, and he would only agree if he can't intervene himself." She pulled at her hair, exasperated, her heart pounding furiously in her chest. "Why won't you tell me any of this? Why won't you just talk to me?"

The woods surrounding them seemed to pause, absorbing her words, and holding their breath.

Jasper's eyes were trained low on the ground, but when he finally looked up, his expression instantly unsettled her. There was a wild mix of fear, pride, and deep resignation.

"Because I know who you are," Jasper said quietly, a bite beneath his tone. "I know exactly who you are. And you are one factor in this entire equation that I cannot manipulate; your emotions are far from my reach and control. Do you understand? You are inherently impulsive and you're on the brink of your seventh manic episode. The best thing I can do for you is to keep you out of this."

Bella rocked back on her heels, suddenly feeling drained. "Because I'm a liability."

"Because the fear of death stupefies mortals. And I will not lose you to one stupid, human decision."

Bella wiped at her cheeks again. God, she hated this. Her emotions might be far from Jasper's reach, but she wore them so openly on her face. "If Alice succeeds, you're going to lose me anyway."

"She will not succeed."

"How can you guarantee that?"

Jasper didn't respond, because he knew he couldn't. There was no certainty that Jasper could keep Alice away.

Bella took a step forward, searching his eyes which seemed to grow more distant by the second. "If you want to protect me, do it from my side. If you're with me, Alice can't hurt me. Use Carlisle as an excuse. Use your legal obligation to me as an excuse."

Jasper shook his head once, staring off into the dark woods. "Alice needs to think I'm considering her deal. That means showing her that I'm willing to give her all of my attention. But she also expects and knows that I wouldn't give up on my responsibility to you altogether—which is why she knows that Esme is my backup." And then his gaze focused keenly on her. "If she truly suspects that I intend to mate you, this deal would throw her off. Because—"

"Because it's easier for you to gain your freedom through Maria," Bella finished for him. "And it's true."

Jasper was before her the next second, the gust of wind from his speed blowing her hair back. His hand was up, hovering just above her left cheek as if almost about to cup her face. And his next words might have stopped her world from turning entirely. "You're worth more to me than what Maria could ever do for me, Bella."

You're worth more than my freedom.

She blinked at him, and her heart wouldn't settle. No, it soared with such intensity, the woods around them spun, threatening to dizzy her to her knees.

His hand dropped to his side without a single brush of skin. "I don't have time to dip into a lake."

She blinked, her mind spinning once again. "You'll have time Sunday, won't you?" In two days. Which meant— "Edward's back on Monday, Jasper. I asked Esme if she could…"

"No." Jasper took a step back, already turning away. "It's a bad idea. Alice won't fall for any distraction Esme could muster."

"An hour. Just an hour. Please. Before Edward—"

Jasper spun around, his eyes locking sharply with hers. "No instant gratification is worth losing eternity. Do not think like a human, Bella. We're in this for the long game."

Bella could only watch as Jasper was before her one moment, and then gone the next. She stared into the space where he had been standing.

"The long game," she said into the emptiness of the clearing, her fists clenching at either side of her.

There would be no game at all if Alice succeeded in securing a sire bond between them. That would be the end, and Bella would be the subservient puppet Alice desired. Jasper couldn't save her from that. No one could save her from that.

She allowed the tears to come to relieve the unending pressure in her head. She was choking on her feelings—the good, the bad, the agonizing. But as she dried her face with her sleeves, she took comfort in the numbness that came after the release.

And then she slowly walked home, sniffling, listening to the chirping grasshoppers embedded deep into the tall grass in her backyard. Once inside, she caught Charlie dozing in the living room, the TV remote balancing precariously on his stomach. She turned on the little light in the kitchen and squinted up into the pantry.

Oh, how right Jasper was. She was impulsive, and she was so devastatingly human.

On her tiptoes, she reached for the neck of the red wine tucked away on its side. Pulling it down, she stared at the label, her other fingers already scratching at the seal at its top.

She worked the corkscrew quickly, taking her first sip directly from the bottle as she ascended up to her room. Esme was already seated at the desk, her golden eyes gleaming in the dark as she watched her.

Bella sat on her bed, gathering her comforter around her as she tilted the bottle up against her lips. Leaning against her headboard, Bella closed her eyes. For a while, she only let the wine flow, relishing the bitterness on her tongue, and the warmth spreading in her chest.

And then, into the silence, she rasped, "Can I use your cabin?"

Esme's voice was uncertain when she replied, "Of course."

"Monday?"

A beat, and then Esme said, "Of course."

"That's when Edward's back." Bella nodded, licking her lips, and then taking another sip of the dry, red wine. "I think he would appreciate the gesture."

"Bella?"

"Esme." She smiled, and it hurt her cheeks, the skin stiff from the remnants of salty tears. "Jasper knows me too well."

It was a little while later that Esme said, "Jasper told me you shouldn't be drinking."

"And you know what else?" She ran a thumb over the lip of the bottle, gazing at it wondrously. "I think he just might be in love with me."

To be worth more than his freedom? Fuck. Surely, she wasn't hallucinating this.

"Bella, can I have the bottle?"

"No," Bella said softly, scoffing as if she was ridiculous. "You can't drink. That's why I have to, before I can't anymore." She took another sip, leaning her head back. "I shouldn't take this for granted. Alice said so."

The sigh she heard was heavy, exasperated. "Please, Bella. I don't want to see you like this."

And then sorrow wrinkled Bella's brow as her eyes opened wider against the heaviness of the alcohol. She stared down at the bottle in her lap. "It dampens fear, it gives you courage. And I can't be afraid."

"You have nothing to fear."

Bella closed her eyes again. "Do you think Jasper would forgive me?"

A long moment of silence. Bella placed the bottle on her nightstand, and then scooted down to the bed. The room spun when her head hit the pillow.

"Do you think he would forgive me?" Bella mumbled, tucking her hands beneath her head. "Do you think he would forgive me if I failed?"

A/N: I fear and yet I hope at the same time.

And I do love being so devastatingly human.

~blu