Subaru was approaching the next location where they would record season 3, supposely where the other four archbishop were also waiting.

As the army of harem and subaru arrived at the Watergate City.

"Wooaaahh! They didn't lie it was a city full of water!"

Rem clinged to his arm "There's water in its name for a reason" Then she sniffed subaru, and she bounced back "You still stink Subaryu" then she pinched her nose.

Elsa leaned in to sniff subaru too then she looked at Rem "The only stench there is just Rapey hero's sweat"

Typhoon skipped towards Subaru "Let me sniff too-"

Subaru bounced back and protected himself "Woah woah hold there everyone! I can't just let you all sniff me all day, come on!"

As the silence reigned over the square, Emilia stepped up "if it was me-"

Subaru's clothes ripped off and he jumped into a ball cannon towards her "EMILLIAAAAAAAAAAA-"

Emilia punched him in the face, halting all his momentum "Rapey Hero, remember, sex only at the end of the story."

Subaru on the ground with tomato splattered on his face, said "Yes.. you all said that eight times."

Subaru got up and dusted himself off. "Well girls and boys, we are set off to see Regulus."

Felix pounced behind him and asked "Rapey hero, are we gonna visit him?"

Subaru raised a finger, and a smirk "No! We are gonna violate his rights!"

The army of harem raised their fist and yelled "LEEEEEEEEETTSSS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-"

Regulus was inside a church with his 200 husbands.

Regulus was in naked except for the level of his waist, which was covered by a black skirt.

"It is my right isnt it wearing anything i want, right!?"

"yes master"

"Do you think this skirt is fitting for me?"

"yes master"

Regulus span and jojo posed. "Oh!"

"You're next line is 'there you are!'"

the church doors blasted open, with Subaru and his horde of harem "There you are!" Subaru yelled

Then subaru gasped "How did you know!?"

Regulus pulled out a clipboard under his skirt and said "I read it in the plot" and jojo posed again "Anyways, werent you suppose to kill my allies first before meeting me? And that one hour and half long speech? I was preparing myself! And you just barge in my home without any word or warning!"

Subaru jojo posed in response "I did! I said ABRACADABRA! but since you are the only mother fucker that isnt affected by it, im gonna VIOLATE YOU!"

Regulus gasped and tucked his skirt "You are gonna VIOLATE ME?" then he pointed at Subaru "Men! Violate him first!"

The 200 husbands of regulus slowly faced like robots towards Subaru and his harem.

Subaru and the harem had stitched on their lips, and the harem looked at subaru.

Typhoon bounced near him and said "Well, rapey hero, enjoy!"

Subaru snapped his head to her and yeled "WHAT, arent you all gonna help me?!"

Then 80% of them responded "nope"

Emilia, rem, and otto responded "Yes, i would!"

Subaru then responded "Well atleast someone with me, meanwhile the others are just spectating"

Sbaru then though "Soo, if 80% said no, why the 20% are so few"

Otto shrugged "As if the author remembers each invidual person in the harem"

Subaru let out a short hum and said "Huh, alright." then he turned to look at regulus

"Alright, do your villian speech, regulus!"

Regulus widen his stance and said "..." then he scratched his chin and asked "Which one?"

Subaru facepalmed, teleporting next to regulus with a clipboard, he showed it to regulus "Pick one"

Regulus looked at the various villian speeches that he had at his disposal, then he pointed at one "This one looks the best"

then Subaru teleported to his harem.

Regulus cleared his throat and said "Skirts! They are humanity's first creation, they were simple and everyone wore them; from the childrens to the elders of all ages. Then they were used by warriors! Men, big MEN. They were glorious, big, and big! and hhuhh.. big! Skirts.. Skirts! They wore beautiful-"

"Alright stop what kind of villian speech is that- are you even reading the script?!" Subaru yelled

"No! I have memorized the script-"

"-Memorize the script my ass you are saying the most random thing i ever heard, does it have anything to do with you expect the fact you are wearing a skirt yourself?!"

Regulus threw his hands in the air and yelled "Alright fine, you got the patience of a woman about to give birth god dammit ill get to the point!"

Regulus continued his villian speech but this time trimmed 90% of his speech "Skirts! They were originally made for men in battle! But one day, they were stolen and repurposed, so men couldnt wear them anymore! Want to know who's to blame for this?!"

"no"

"WOMEN, they are stolen our skirts and our battle symbols, and here i am going to take it back, NOW! And this is my plan to-"

Subaru yelled "FASTER GODDAMIT, I WANT TO SLEEP WITH MY HAREM"

"Alright alright FINE, Ill enslave all men, then make all them immortal, and KILL ALL WOMEN."

then regulus jojo posed.

Felix argyle looked around, and said "But im still wearing a skirt nya"

Regulus still in his jojo pose stared at Felix and said "Thats because you identify as a woman, you dont count"

"Nyah but i still identify as a boy!"

Regulus stared at him for a moment "I said MEN, you are a boy."

"Fair, but im still wearing skirts!"

Subaru yelled "Alright, are we ready to kick his ass?!" at the 20% of the harem willing to fight, meanwhile the 80% just sat by the sidelines and ate popcorn.

Regulus then gestured them to halt "You are just kicking my ass, you are kicking OUR asses!"

Regulus's 200 husbands jojo posed and flexed their muscles as their wedding clothes ripped apart and revealed they had skirts under their wedding clothes.

Then emilia stood in the middle and widen his stance, "Rapey hero, im gonna take care of this"

Subaru turned to emilia and asked "Hey, didnt you say that you were gonna be useless for the entire story?"

Emilia winked to him "Not in this season"

Emilia then gestured them to approach and said "Alright, be good boys and line up for me"

And the 200 husbands actually formed a line from Emilia to the altar, but since there wasnt enough space, one of the husbands broke the altar and wall behind it to make space and they finally formed a very long line.

Then Emilia started to supplex them one by one because she could, and they took a step every time one was supplexed.

After a while, Regulus ruffled with his hair, the fury in his face told everything "Oh god why are you all so dumb! Why are you listening to her!? She's a woman! A WOMAN!"

The remaining husbands turned to Regulus and said "Shit, your right!"

Then they all turned to Emilia and they formed a single line, but this time it was like a football formation ready to tackle.

And they charged at Emilia at the same time and with their hands, they grasped eachother's butt to keep formation steady and tight. Subaru wondered how the fuck this satire fanfic even comes up with the sentence they hold eachother's butt to keep formation tight

Then emilia said "You are all mistaken that i will just stand here and take it!"

"Here! Take the curse of being in the radius of a woman like me!"

Emilia pulling the cords that held togheter her clothes, then the top part of her dress fell. An flare of holy light emited from her.

The remaining husbands screeched and yelled, as they halted and protected their eyes "AAAAHHH, MY EYES, MY EYES, THEY BURN! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-"

then their bodies started to disintegrate from the mere brush of light emiting from Emilia, and they all turned into dust.

Regulus fell on his knees "you all defeat my husbands, my dear husbands. How impossible, it shouldnt have been possible! I and my loved ones, we were invincible for centuries, and you just come here and flash your breasts to my husbands and kill all of them."

"Impossible, impossible-"

Subaru pushed aside Emilia and said "Alright Emilia, you did your part, its my time to shine-"

"-DIEEE" regulus yelled

Regulus catapulted himself to Subaru, and both dissappeared from how fast they went.

Emilia looking behind herself, just sat down and started to chow down on some protein bars. The rest of the harem just shrugged and walked out to search for both of them.

Meanwhile Regulus grapping by the neck, he launched himself and Subaru towards a mountain, and he sat on Subaru. Then Regulus said said "Alright, after you killed all my hencemen, you the protagonist you are gonna face me! The super bad guy!"

Subaru responded "Wow, amazing speech, can you please die?"

Regulus "No!"

Subaru shrugged "Well, i tried"

Regulus jumped and black flipped fifty times for style points, and came down like an anvil with a bodyslam, and the air around his form started to burn.

Reaching Subaru, he caused a mushroom cloud as the mountain collapsed.

As they reached at the bottom of the mountain, what was all left of Subaru was just a skeleton.

Then a star appeared, a purple star, with its trail following behind it. It slowly came down to where regulus and subaru were and it crashed down on them, making Regulus fly away.

Beatrice, she stood on Subaru's corpse and cracked her knuckles "In this chapter im gonna act the best i can."

Regulus then asked "really."

Beatrice responded "yes"

Beatrice cleared her throat "I found you both, i suppose. Didnt took much time to find you both idiots since i can sense the stupidity of you both from miles.. i suppose."

Regulus then asked "So what, are you gonna kill me?"

Beatrice said "No, he will." he pointed at Reinhard behind her.

Then Reinhard waved with a smile "Hello! Im gonna kill you!"

Regulus then titled his head "How? Im invincibl-"

Reinhard grapped Regulus' skirt and flung him into the air so hard that he crossed the atmosphere and exited the world, entering into space. He went so fast that he immediately exited the solar system, his invincible body started to freeze until he was encased into ice. He became so cold that his brain stopped thinking.

meanwhile back in the world, Subaru was still a skeleton, Beatrice and Reinhard looked at him. Reinhard just lightly kicked Subaru in the head and Subaru yelled "Ouch what the hell!" His skeleton form raised from the floor

Reinhard smiled "Stop being dead"

Subaru sighed "Alright." He reached from the top of his head and pulled down a zipper, revealing him but with flesh and skin. He dusted himself off, and asked "So, end of the story?"

Beatrice let out a annoyed sigh "No, there are still lots of arcs and seasons to go through, and the author of this fanfic doesnt read the light novel of Re:zero so forget it unless another season comes out."

"But we are at the end of this season."

Subaru sighed "alright."

Reinhard asked "Sooo, what we do in the next chapters?"

Subaru pulled out the clipboard with plans and plans. "Hmmmmmmm."

He poked the part that is labelled as plans, and he pulled out a file out of it, then opened it. "Well, there is nothing!"

Then Ram appeared "There you are, you all, come back to the mansion now."

Subaru turned to look at her "Why?"

Ram then said "Because i told you so, do it before i kick you into obvlion and have a dilemma whenever to cut off your balls or not."

Subaru then ruffled with his hair "Alright alright, im coming."

And thus all the harems, subaru and all the boys and girls went back to the mansion by skipping and singing "la la la"

Arriving at the mansion, they were greeted by Michael jackson, the owner of the estate and benefactor of Emilia "Eheheh!"

"Hi michael jackson"

"Eheheh!"

Subaru asked "Time to party?"

"Eheheh!" He pointed to the sky and a disco ball was pulled down and it started to shine lights all over the room and michael jackson songs started to play

"Annie, are you OK? Can you tell us that you're OK-"

"Not that one, i heard it so many times i got sick of it"

"I'm starting with the man in the mirror, I'm asking him to change his ways."

"Better."

Subaru turned to all of his harems and yelled "Girls and boys! Lets dance!"

And they all danced under the disco ball and the singing of michael jackson.

"Hehehe!"

End of the chapter