A/N Guest, I love both your ideas, the first one, Xander being in charge of building an Afterlife is a concept I've never seen before, but sounds fun. The second one, would be angsty/adventure and probably have Xander fanboying to start with, before they settle in and definitely angsty if Willow tears them out of it. I think I've got an angle on how to make a story like that work so it's definitely going on my list of future stories. Thank you for the ideas.

As for the idea that Willow was a demon or changeling that came back to maybe undo the good the Scoobies had done, that would be an evil version of a fixit story and also has all kinds of possibilities I've never considered and now you've got me brainstorming those too, so that idea has to go on my list too. Is it a good or a bad thing that I prefer to try write one story at a time? Right now I'm juggling two and it's a bit of a struggle, if I was willing to commit to multiple stories at one time. No, I'd probably end up doing one chapter of each a day and they'd drag on forever.

To those of you asking me to cross post, I'm working on it, if anyone's willing to help me, you could PM me and we can discuss it. Right now, I'm not giving blanket permission for just anyone to post my stories elsewhere. Be patient, I will get my stories on other sites.

######

"Buffy, I had a conversation with Xander earlier and I'm disturbed by what we talked about." Joyce ventured into the topic she felt needed to be discussed with her daughter with an uneasy feeling she wasn't going to like how it went.

"What about?" Buffy picked at the meal Joyce had made and wondered if the others would have a problem with her visiting Willow at the hospital or were they still mad at her?

"You told me you hope he'll forgive you some day."

"Well, yeah. He's pretty mad at me and I guess he has reason to be." Buffy admitted. "If I hadn't let Angelus go or hadn't gotten involved with Angel, none of this would have happened. Willow, his parents, Ms. Calendar." She moved the food around on her plate and tried to work up some enthusiasm for eating.

"He mentioned how you reacted after returning from visiting you father last summer, after you drowned and he revived you."

"Yeah, I wasn't very nice to Angel or anyone, really. I was so mean to everyone."

"Did you ever apologize to anyone for the way you were behaving?"

"No, why would I? They knew I died and everything. Smashing the Master's bones helped me feel better and a good cry helped even more."

"Xander commented that your method of thanking him was the cruelest thing anyone had ever done to him. What did you do to him, Buffy?"

Buffy looked confused. "I didn't do anything mean to him, I just danced with him to make Angel jealous and it worked too, Angel was jealous."

"Why would Xander think this dance was a thank you for saving you?" Joyce asked, wondering if this was what Xander had labeled cruel and why.

"Well, I guess because I asked him if I'd thanked him for saving me and asked if he'd like it if I thanked him. Cordelia accused me of running for Bitch of the Year, but it was just a dance, no big deal. Xander was probably thrilled I danced with him at all, he does have a crush on me."

"He had a crush on you, Buffy, he doesn't anymore. Tell me about this dance, why did Cordelia call you a bitch because of it?"

"Well, it was a slow dance, sort of well, sexy I guess."

"And you thought Xander would appreciate this dance? That you used to make Angel jealous and asked Xander that question?" Was the bleach she used on her hair seeping in her brain? She couldn't be that oblivious, could she?

"Well, of course he'd appreciate it, he'd been wanting to dance with me or go on a date with me since we met."

"When exactly did this dance take place?"

"Middle of September, just after school started back up."

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't Xander ask that Ampata girl out what, three weeks or so after that? And didn't he and Cordelia get started on their relationship soon after that?"

"Yeah, so?"

"I think you made it extremely obvious you were using him against Angel and I don't for a second believe you don't understand how offense both your question and that dance were. You used Xander to try to make yourself feel better and you hurt him in the process. You wanted to hurt him, just as you wanted to hurt Angel and yes, you were hurting and confused yourself. You died and they saved you. You probably didn't know whether to be happy you were alive or angry for being dragged back into this horrible Chosen thing and you took your pain and confusion out on them. Did you apologize to Angel for your actions?"

"Well, yeah, kinda. Willow convinced him to ask me on a date and we talked about it."

"But you didn't apologize to Xander and you convinced yourself he appreciated the dance and maybe didn't know that you were using him and wanted to hurt him?"

"He likes me, as more than a friend, why wouldn't he appreciate me dancing with him?"

"Appreciate you condescending to lower yourself to dance with him while trying to hurt another man." Joyce let that sink in for a moment. "He was well aware of what you were doing, he forgave you not because of a crush, which probably got a stake through the heart that night, but because he understood you were in a bad place mentally and emotionally. I believe he started moving on from his crush that night, which is why he allowed himself to be interested in Ampata and why he chose to pursue a relationship with Cordelia after that. The fact that it never occured to you to apologize to him bothers both him and me. It says you have little respect for him as a person, let alone his efforts to help with being the Slayer. You don't treat him very well, not as a friend or as a member of your support the Slayer group and as I understand it, Dr. Zabuto believes Xander has provided you more help than anyone else. At the very least Xander deserves an apology and a genuine thank you. He doesn't expect either, by the way. He doesn't expect a thank you because he just wanted to help, to hopefully do something good. He doesn't expect an apology because I believe he knows you don't respect him or the help he's given you. I'd like to know why you don't respect either him or his help. Or why only now you're bothered by him being angry at you."