.…..

The Flood Games

Chapter Four: Point of No Return

...

There were few places on dry land where Annie truly felt at ease. She was at her happiest when she was at the water's edge or splashing in the waves like a seal pup, or even relaxing in arm's reach of the ocean in her mother's hidden cove. Yet, despite the sea's claim on her heart, it was as though the rest of the world drifted miles away when she sat at the bench of Mags's harpsichord.

She hadn't always had a knack for it. It had taken her many years to train her fingers to play something that could almost pass for music. It was five years ago while Finnick was in the arena that something finally clicked, and even then it took hours of practice every week to maintain any level of talent. Even if she never improved, though, Annie knew that she would have kept returning to the bench every week anyways. The repetitive movements of her fingers against the wooden keys soothed her soul in a way that little else could. It was almost as though she could feel the stress melting away from her body with each tap, and the melodic sound it produced relaxed her further.

The other occupants of Mags's villa were bustling about, preparing for the reaping, but she paid them no mind. She was only vaguely aware of Finnick lounging on the couch behind her, which was something that would have concerned her greatly had her mind not been otherwise occupied. Even the warmth of Ripley curled up beside her on the bench was of little notice, though her soft purring was subconsciously lulling Annie into a deeper state of relaxation.

"I wish I could stay like this all day," Finnick mused quietly.

Annie hummed in response, fingers gliding across the double keyboards. The quiet moment between the two of them was soon interrupted, before she could really register what was happening enough to enjoy it, by the entrance of two of the other victors.

"She's really taken to it, hasn't she?" Ron asked, settling into the armchair. Kai strolled in behind him, sitting on the thin arm of the couch by Finnick's legs.

"I wish I could be there to hear that big piece she's playing at the festival tonight," Kai sighed.

Annie smiled at their compliments, breaking her concentration just long enough to respond. "You're listening to it now."

This perked Kai up a bit. "Wait, really? But this is what you always play."

"Well... yeah. 'Cause I've been practicing," she hummed. "It's gotta be perfect."

Kai still seemed stupefied. The melody of the harpsichord was the only sound for a moment, before Ron finally broke the near silence.

"Wait, did you really not know she had to practice?"

"Did you think Annie had some brand new song she never played hiding up her sleeve for tonight?" Finnick laughed.

"Oh shut up before I whack you so hard you'll wish you still had that hangover!"

Annie giggled, missing a note before regaining her composure. She finished the piece with relative ease, spinning around on the bench dramatically and taking a bow once finished. Her companions applauded her loudly, earning an exacerbated sigh from Mags as she walked by.

"Shouldn't you all be getting ready?"

"I am ready!" Annie beamed, twirling around in circles to show off her dress. It was a bright sky blue, with darker blue waves embroidered into the skirt- the very same dress her mother liked to wear for reaping days as a teenager. Attina had tied a silky blue ribbon into her chocolate brown curls that morning, and the ensemble was completed with one of her shell necklaces.

Mags smiled, nodding in approval. "You look lovely, my dear. That dress suits you."

"And I brought over everything I'll need while we're here during the Games, and all of Ripley's stuff too. So we're good to go. All that's left to do is wait until it's time to leave," Annie added quickly.

She always stayed in Victors' Village during the Games, as did her grandfather and sister. When Mags was away mentoring it meant someone was still home to keep the house tidy and mind the garden, and during the years Mags stayed behind she preferred to keep her family close by for the sake of her nerves. There was still much to be done in the district during the Games anyways, between organizing the Reaping Day Festival and cleanup thereafter, managing District sponsor gifts, and ensuring the families of the volunteers were doing all right. Annie always found herself lost in the hustle and bustle, running errands and doing odds and ends chores for the victors who stayed behind to ensure that everything continued to run smoothly. It was rare to have a moment to oneself. She couldn't imagine what life must be like during the Games for districts without many victors. She tried not to give it much thought.

Mags turned her attention to Finnick, in his state of near dishevelment.

"Go find your aunt," she sighed wearily. "See if she can do something about those dark circles under your eyes."

Finnick groaned, but rolled off the couch anyways and dragged himself out of the room. If anyone in Four could make him look presentable, it would have to be Tiggs. For years, before her nephew was even old enough to consider volunteering, the older girl had dreamed of following in her namesake's footsteps and making it as a Capitol stylist. Though she had long since accepted reality for what it was, she was still highly respected in the district for what she could do with a bolt of cloth. She had even picked up enough makeup skills from Finnick's prep team to take over their job completely on Reaping Day mornings, though she never seemed too happy with her role in sending Finnick off to the very place she had once dreamed of.

Mags took Finnick's place on the couch, and Annie returned to the bench next to Ripley. She turned to face the couch rather than the harpsichord this time, burying her hand into the cat's soft, spotted fur. Ripley's purring intensified, and she shifted to lay her tiny head against Annie's thigh.

"Did you decide if you're staying home this year?" Annie asked, knitting her brows together.

Mags sighed, smoothing the wrinkle in the leg of her dress pants. "Oh, I think I just might. I worry about Finnick, going without me, but I'm not getting any younger. It's just not an easy trip to make, and it gets harder every year."

"I'm sure if you ask Finnick, he'll stay for you," Annie said quietly. "Then you wouldn't have to worry about him."

The victors avoided her gaze. They knew as well as Annie that Finnick took any opportunity to go back to the Capitol. And why shouldn't he? Wherever he went, Finnick was surrounded by adoring fans and all the luxuries a victor could ever want. Annie had often wondered what brought him back to District Four at all, especially now that Siren was gone. Tiggs, maybe, but wouldn't she have something to gain by the move as well?

Annie's head throbbed slightly, and she felt her stomach knotting up again. She always made herself sick when she thought of Finnick leaving. Something was off about the Finnick she would see on the television screen. The Finnick who would come home wasn't much better. It was like he was gradually changing into another person, and Annie wasn't so certain that she liked who he was becoming. She just wanted the old Finnick back. The one who would meet her after school with Attina and Caspian, who insisted with Caspian on waiting for her the day Attina was mad at her and wanted to leave her behind. The one who would help her gather shells for Ari and pull pranks on Kai. The one who never held back when Mags had them spar with their training tridents even though all of the other older children in their training group did, because he believed she was just as strong as Korra and Siren were.

She missed him. Really missed him. No one talks about the grief we feel for people who are still alive. In some ways, it's easier to miss the dead. There isn't that blind and bitter hope that everything could go back to the way it was, someday in the not so distant future. People understand that grief better. People offered their sympathies to Annie regarding Marissa's death all the time, even years after it happened. But few could understand how much she could miss Finnick when he was right there, tangible and alive, yet somehow unreachable.

She had given up on trying to find someone who understood her a few months after Finnick's sixteenth birthday celebration in the Capitol. He had stayed there for over a month, surrounded by luxuries and an ever changing whirlwind of older women. When he did finally come back, he shut himself in his room for weeks and avoided everyone but Mags and Siren after his self-imposed isolation ended. He barely ate. Attina had angrily told her that it was because his palate became so used to the refinery of the Capitol that he couldn't stomach the plain foods of District Four anymore. It was around this time that she realized Finnick's taste for the finer things in life had expanded beyond just what he ate. She realized that she and Caspian, and even Attina who had always been his very closest friend, were a lot like the simple foods that Mags had patiently encouraged him to eat before he ran to the bathroom retching. They just didn't have a place in his world anymore.

It was a week after this revelation when she broke down, feeling the need to talk to someone, anyone, about it. She had tearfully approached one of her teachers after the Career trainees left for the Academy for the day, as she herself had long since given up on formal training with her peers at that point, asking her teacher what to do. The teacher seemed unimpressed, even bored by her tears.

"What were you expecting? People change. Even if he wasn't Panem's darling, no one keeps the same friends all their life. Do I look like I have time for this?" the teacher had scoffed, making a point of slamming her office door behind her.

Annie had learned to bottle up her feelings after that.

...

The victors and Annie's grandfather left for the Reaping earlier than the others, leaving Annie to walk with Attina. She took longer than usual to say goodbye to Ripley, as the cat's soft fur beneath her fingers soothed her nerves greatly, but she couldn't stall forever. It was odd, how nervous she felt. She knew that she should be excited for today, after all the preparation she had put into it. But as she walked a few paces behind her sister and Caspian, the gnawing sensation at the pit of her stomach only grew more intense.

"All right guys, here we are!" Attina announced, grinning giddily.

Hand entwined with Caspian's, she pulled him towards Annie and released his hand to link their arms together. She took a step back to examine them, stepping forward again to adjust Annie's necklace and brush Caspian's hair out of his eyes.

"I can't believe it's your first Reaping without me," she cooed, circling around to check the ribbon in Annie's hair. "Oh you look so grown up!"

"Thanks dear," Caspian said with a smirk.

Attina scowled. "Not you, moron. I meant the kid sister. Keep an eye on her for me, will you? I swear someone's gonna get trampled in these crowds."

"I think you look grown up too, Casp," Annie said defensively. Caspian smiled down at her, tightening his grip on her arm protectively. "And how am I still "the kid sister" if I look all grown up today?"

"Because you'll always be my 'lil baby, duh. Okay, I'll see you in a bit. I love you both so much! Mwah! Mwah!" Attina exclaimed, giving each of them an over-the-top kiss on the cheek.

Annie giggled, whereas Caspian turned beet red and looked away shyly. She noticed him fidgeting with the pendant tucked into his shirt, waiting until Attina disappeared into the crowd to question him.

"Casp? What's up with the necklaces?" she asked as Caspian led her to the line.

Caspian grinned. "It's a surprise. I know how much you hate those, but just wait a bit longer, okay?"

Annie nodded, not satisfied with his answer in the least. They stood next to each other rather than separating to stand single file like the others, though the Peacekeepers didn't seem to care. So long as they signed in without complaint, the Peacekeepers generally weren't too picky about what the teenagers did. There were simply too many of them to process through the lines for them to worry about nitpicking.

"Heyo, Casper! Annie! How's it going?"

Annie's mood brightened significantly as she recognized the voice. Tugging on Caspian's arm to drag him with her, she left their spot in line and skipped a few spaces to the end.

"Nyla! Hi!" Annie grinned, bumping her free fist against the older girl's.

"Ready for tonight, Niles?" Caspian asked.

Nyla beamed, bouncing up and down on the balls of her feet. "I was born ready! Gosh, eighteen. It's finally our year, huh?"

The Reaping Day Festival was the biggest celebration of the year. It was first and foremost a show of support for the families of the year's volunteers, and a preemptive celebration of their hopeful victories in the Games. But the festival had evolved into a life of its own among the district's teenagers. It had become a coming-of-age celebration for the yearly batch of eighteen year-old's who had just been phased out of the Reaping, a time to nail down their futures now that the life of a victor was out of their grasp. Apprenticeships would be offered, proposals would be made to significant others, and jobs would be accepted. It was a time of transition from teenager to adult. A celebration of all the bright futures in store for the district's youths.

"Any big plans?" Caspian asked.

Nyla scoffed. "Oh please, you know it's bad luck to announce anything before the party. But yeah, I think... I've made peace with the way things are."

Annie bit her lip. "It should've been you today. Not Seille."

The older girl smiled sadly, ruffling Annie's hair softly. "Yeah. I know. Can't be helped though! It's one less thing for me to worry about now. Oh, line's moving!"

As the trio inched forward, Annie smoothed down her hair. She just hoped Nyla didn't mess it up too badly. The last thing she wanted was to have messy hair on Reaping Day, especially after all the work Attina and Tiggs had put into it that morning. There were cameras everywhere, and of course she was going to be seeing Finnick after the Reaping... she just wanted to look her best. That was all. But she knew she'd be teased if she voiced these thoughts, so she kept them to herself.

They chatted idly until they reached the front of the line. Then Nyla stamped her finger, and then Caspian, because ever since she was twelve Annie had always gone last. And with that, the group was separated. Caspian and Nyla with the 18 year-old's, while Annie stood alone by the aisle in her own section.

It was one of the downsides of never befriending her own classmates. It wasn't for lack of trying, just that she'd never really learned how. At least she'd had Attina's friends, who had integrated her seamlessly into their little group far before her awkward cluelessness could make itself apparent with age. Yet they often felt more like Attina's friends than her own, and she longed to have someone around who had befriended her first. But with every strained conversation and stuttered response, the years had made it evident to Annie that there was some unspoken rule of communication she never got to learn. Muscida always said it was because she never looked anyone in the eyes, but she didn't understand why that could make a difference. After all, eye contact was usually painful. It made her feel nervous and vulnerable, like all of her thoughts were being laid out in the open. Surely something so unpleasant couldn't be the key she was missing.

Her nerves fizzled as Mayor Chambers and District 4's escort, Proserpine Miraz, took the stage. She tuned out Proserpine's unchanging long-winded monologue in favor of psyching herself up for the weeks to come. She waved at Mags and smiled brightly at Librae and Ari when they seemed to look in her direction, before fixing her eyes on the Reaping bowls. The bowls were really only there as a formality; District 4 hadn't had a lack of volunteers in years. But Annie knew better than to take this for granted. It had only been a few years since an epidemic had wiped out a considerable chunk of District 2's most promising trainees, and many of the survivors still had some residual battle scars from the illness. District 2's selected tributes in recent Games had yet to fully regain the ferocity the district had been previously known for, which Four and One had quickly taken advantage of. Annie knew that District 4 could have easily fallen to the same fate after the destruction of the training center, and she didn't fail to remind herself how lucky her district had been.

And still. It was there, lingering at the back of her mind. What would happen if no one volunteered in the wake of the district's tragedy? She knew that at least the female tribute would be accounted for this year, but what about their male tribute? What if no one volunteered for him? What if Proserpine reaped a boy who didn't participate in training, or a younger teenager? The boy from District 2 during the 66th Hunger Games had only been 13, after all. Sure, Finnick had won at 14, as did Gloss from District 1, but both of them had been volunteers at the very least. Annie knew that she wouldn't be able to forget poor little Lewis, who had anticipated having many more years of training than what he got. If fate had only been a bit kinder, perhaps he would've brought home a victory for District 2 this year instead of dying four years ago before he really stood a chance. Who was to say that District 4 wouldn't repeat this tragedy?

It was the job of a Career district to prepare their tributes for the battle ahead. It was how they got their children home alive, rather than in a casket. It was what separated their district from the likes of District 9 or 12, who did nothing to protect their children and had nothing but loss to show for it. Her eyes wandered to the section where the younger teenagers were gathered, and she bit her lip in worry before returning her gaze to the stage. Finnick, to his credit, had returned to the cocky heartthrob the Capitol knew him to be. Annie wasn't sure if this eased her worries or made them worse.

"And now it's time to select one lucky young woman to represent District Four in the 70th annual Hunger Games!"

Annie inhaled sharply, steadying herself before she could collapse in surprise. She had zoned out longer than she thought, which meant that there was little time remaining before the big moment. Maybe not enough. She looked from Finnick to Proserpine to Seille, smoothing her dress nervously. One quick moment, and then it would be over. It was time. Seille whispered something to her friends, and the cacophony of giggles that followed was sure to be loud enough to make it on camera. Annie did her best not to focus on what the chosen volunteer may have said. All that really mattered were these next few moments.

"Saoirse Dawson!"

The crowd cheered happily as Saoirse proudly stepped away from the other 17 year-old's and walked to the stage. There would be a special place of honor for her at the festival tonight. Proserpine took Saoirse's hand in her own and held it up high for all to see. Annie tensed every muscle in her body, heart thumping wildly. Timing would be crucial. She had to act fast, before Seille could make a move first.

"Do we have a volunteer?"

Annie's hand shot up in the air, fast as lightning.

"I volunteer as tribute!"

….

One week left until Sunrise on the Reaping! Also known as one week left before this fic probably becomes non-canon compliant. I've tried to avoid listing what years any OC victors won thus far, but with my luck we'll get a list of every victor in 4, 7, or 10, which would be inconvenient since timeline-wise Marissa, Ivy, and Angus probably couldn't have won after Haymitch.

I'm reasonably certain that I assigned game years to all of them within my Johanna-centric series, but since that one was mostly written before Ballad was released it doesn't exactly have a great track record for lining up with canon either. I did call Snow having a brief relationship with a tribute, though, so I am pretty smug about that (I'm not sure if her name being Ivory is awkward or hilarious in hindsight).

Depending on what information we get from the new book, I'll either ignore it or make some small changes to the story going forward. We'll see. I can't go back and edit out Marissa though, mostly because she's 90% of Annie's motivation for volunteering but also because she's been a part of the story since the very first draft I started 11 years ago. It wouldn't be the same fanfiction without her haunting the narrative like Lucy Gray haunts Snow. While there's definitely been changes to the story over the years (Annie was originally reaped instead of a volunteer, for example), at its core it's still the same basic story and I'm planning to stick to it.

At any rate, that's my somewhat scatterbrained official statement on what the book's release will mean for the story going forward. I'm more than content to ignore canon if it means staying true to the plot I've had bouncing around in my head for over a decade, unless the book reveals something that gives me any better ideas.

(It's worth noting that part of my motivation for actually publishing the fic after all these years instead of dooming it to an endless cycle of rewrites in my drafts was so that I could have plausible deniability if it became distinctly un-canon, lol)