Kyla looked at her watch, 30 minutes surveilling the drop point and no sign of him.

"Where are you G?"

He was closer, he should have been here already. Why the fuck did he pick a drop point that was 2 days out for meet back? And how did we get separated in the first place? Where is his head at nowadays?

She smiled to herself, hearing his voice in her head "You're at 3 questions now Ky, do I get to participate in this conversation?"

A hazard of working with your boyfriend was feeling feelings that don't have a place in a military operation. At least the mission was complete so she could worry without guilt. They make an unlikely pair; probably would never have met if the world hadn't ended. A brash, foul mouthed, Taiwanese girl from Brooklyn and a quiet, serious, Irish boy from rural Georgia. But she was certain there was no one else in this world for her. She just wanted to find him so they could return to base.

Using her binoculars, she turned her attention to the surrounding area once more. She appeared to be alone, literally up a tree, without her mission leader. Maybe he stopped to help someone, not exactly CRM protocol but his mantra of "We're strong enough" always prevailed. Remembering the community she came from, its one of the things she loved most about him.

"Damn it! C'mon G…"

It would be dark in another hour. He's been so off lately, spending too much time with Silas and listening to all his conspiracy bullshit. Maybe he's already inside and didn't leave a sign because he's distracted by whatever shit has been going through his head this past week and working out six different scenarios to fix it.

"Fucking Virgos." she sighed, and made up her mind "I'm just going in; I can leave a sign just as well as he can if I'm first in. Maybe there's a spare PRB so I can signal base"

Scanning once more with her binoculars, she counts 6 Delts in a cluster about a mile from the drop point. No other signs of death or life. Climbing down, she moved quickly toward the facility.

She made it to the drop point just as dusk fell. Scouting the outbuilding first, there was a standard emergency vehicle and fuel but no signs of life. Moving carefully to the main building, she peered into the window. Through a slit in the blackout curtains, she could see a ruck sitting on a chair facing the door. Weird. She approached the front door with her gun drawn, entering swiftly, and sweeping her weapon across the room. Shutting the door, she moved closer and could see the ruck had a Helicopter Pilot insignia on the front. It must be him! How many other pilots out here without a bird….

She whisper shouted "G? Are you here?" moving toward the other room, she opened the door carefully and continued her sweep – checked the closets and latrine, no sign of him.

Now she was worried. He would wait here, no way he would leave until she showed.

"Shit! Where are you, Babe?" She took a deep breath and opened the ruck; it was packed with food, ammo, and clothes. Why would he have this much shit for a short recon? And why clothes? She opened the front pocket and pulled out his dog tags and a large envelope with her name written on the front in his handwriting.

Hands shaking, she started to pace. "What the hell?"

Closing her eyes, she stood still for a moment. "C'mon Kyla, this is not the time or place to lose your shit. Open the fucking envelope"

She turned the lock on the front door before pressing her back to it and sliding down to the floor. Opening the envelope, she pulled out maps, keys to a vehicle, a folded note with her name on it, her favorite picture of them, and G's good luck charm. The first thing he bought in the city, the thing he said kept him sane and reminded him to stay safe all these years, that helped him feel close to his family. It was just a small plywood keychain in the shape of a Sheriff's Hat, he never went anywhere without it. Ever.

Suddenly nauseous and lightheaded, she leaned back against the door. "What did you do?" she whispered as she opened the letter.

Dear Kyla,

I'm not coming, and if you don't go now, you'll never get away and we both die here. It's taken me years to understand that I can't go, and it's not right that you're stuck because of me. The only way to get you back to your family is that I stay to make sure.

Jadis will destroy my home if I try to leave, she won't risk me out in the world knowing what I know. She never threatened me before she knew we were together. She knew I couldn't get out on my own. She says the strength we have reminds her of my parents and that together, we can do anything. Now she is threatening you and I need you to live more than I need you to stay.

I love you so so much. Please don't come back. By the time you read this, I'll have been back to base for a day. I'm going to report you go bit and ended it. That I was holding your hand when you died, and that I buried you. If you come back, I'll either be thrown in prison or killed.

Years ago, I made my dad a promise to never let my guard down. "One second and it's over" It was over for me the second I saw you headbutt Okafor. I let my guard down and fell hard for you. Being loved by you is more than I dared to hope for and the best thing that ever happened to me. I'm sorry Kyla, I know you'll hate me for taking away your choice. I hope you can forgive me someday. Stay safe. I love you. Forever.

Carl

Kyla couldn't breathe "No…. no!" She tried to stand but fell to her knees sobbing