An Appointment

By Anelle Lee

Even though my father was normally a kind man the last few months his demeanor towards me in specific had shifted. He hardly looked at me and when he did it was with more than a little malice in his now glowering face. I had moved past wondering what I had done and charged headlong into my own sort of anger at him especially after this morning when I had caught him harshly yelling at my mother in the doorway.

Not thinking I had entered the house in a huff and shouted, "Now father you listen…"

Without warning the man who had never before laid a hand on me or anyone else that I had known of closed the minor space between us and slammed the back of his hand across my face knocking me down to the floor. He grabbed me by the hair and dragged me to the pasture where the horses and cows grazed.

"Saddle two horses Gabrielle! Now!" He threw a couple bridals and they hit me in my sore head with the metal part and at my return to the ground and a dangerous glare that I sent his way he took a menacing step towards me in what I could only describe as multiples from the blurred and dazed vision I had at the moment and I stumbled back up to my trembling knees trying to crawl away only pulled at the suddenly trapping in place skirt. Gasping in pain I finally made my way to my wobbly feet.

A part of me wanted to glare at him but the larger part sent me to the given task without so much as a look in his direction. Gripping my painful head as the horses I had grown up around ran up to me. I loved them but riding has always terrified me. Why did they have to make them so big? The first horse to make it to me was a black mare named Chiron. The horse sniffing the red and blue mark on my face made me wince in fear of the horse touching the injury. Instead the horse nuzzled my chest softly as though it was sympathetic to my pain.

The act was almost beautiful enough to make me smile but the pain lashed out at even the thought and I put the bridle over the large horse's mouth affixing the device to the large accepting head. I was confused by what my dad was making me do. Usually he had one of the farmhands take care of this. I could feel his eyes even now glaring at my back as though I was evil incarnate. I finished getting the horses in the bridals and began leading them towards the man I no longer knew.

Jacob, who was the usual farmhand for the task I was doing, saw me leading the horses across the pasture towards the man and he instantly sprang into action even though his face showed every ounce of confusion that I myself was feeling.

"Jacob!" the man who looked so much like my father screamed and halted his progress, "Leave it!"

My jaw dropped at the use of the word 'it' to address me, my feet even stumbled. Who was this monster that had replaced him? I continued to lead the horses out of the gate and towards the barn where the saddles were kept. I could hear my father following after me, even his steps sounded furious, a look to the house and I could see my mother and sister standing in the doorway. They were both crying their eyes out. I wanted to go and comfort them but knowing that I was the source of their sadness only amplified my own depression.

When I had the horses saddled and ready to go I started to walk back to the house only to have him strike me yet again this time I was slammed into the wall and crumpled to the dirt of the barn floor. A shaky breath filled with dirt filled my lungs. I coughed as the taste of blood and dirt filled my mouth. The next thing I knew he had his hand in my hair and was again dragging me to my feet.

"Get in the saddle!" he growled, pushing me towards Chiron.

I almost fell yet again but barely managed to catch myself by the saddle. He was truly trying to torture me. He knew I was terrified of riding horses but I knew that if I didn't get up there I was likely to get another beating. I reasoned that if I was in the saddle maybe he would stop hitting me. With that in mind I climbed the tall horse trying to push away the nauseous feeling overcoming me.

The man I had grown up calling father climbed aboard Gash. The proud horse threw his mane around as he began to trot out of the barn, "Follow me." he said with his glare firmly affixed to the road. So he wasn't looking at me again. That was more than fine with me.

As we made our way off the property I made sure that I was following a few paces back away from the now violent man. I sent what would become my last look at the house I grew up in and noted that my mother and sister were still crying but now stood on the porch tucked into the safety of each other's arms. A place I so longed to be. My breakfast finding its freedom I leaned over as the contents of my stomach evacuated in an explosion of colors all over the trail though one color in particular seemed to be the clear winner, blood red.

We rode in silence for the next few days. Getting further and further away from the place I called home until I became hopelessly lost. I stared at the man's back and wondered what I could have possibly done to have enraged him so thoroughly. My relationship with him had a few rough spots but nothing like this. He hadn't said a single word since he told me to get onto the horse and follow him, aside from the random order like gather wood for a fire or to set up his bedroll a thing he had not condoned for me instead I was sleeping on the dirt or whatever happened to be on the ground at night.

A few nights in and I had enough of his silence so as we laid on the cold ground with several feet between us I couldn't help myself but to just finally ask him, "What did I do?"

He was silent for so long that I almost thought he was asleep or at the very least that he was awake and choosing not to answer the only question I had left in the world. I sighed and turned my head, followed swiftly by my sore body. A few more minutes passed and I closed my eyes. Finally I heard him coldly say, "I won't have a lesbian daughter. Enough talking!"

My jaw dropped and my eyes sprang open, my hand covering my mouth just as a shocked gasp left my lips. Of course! The night that he had started acting weird my oldest friend in the world had kissed me. I could still feel her soft lips against my own and her delicate hands as they had pulled my body against her own. I must admit that it had felt good and I let it go on for longer than I probably should have. I had no idea that he had seen the encounter or had someone told him. Either way I couldn't truly deny the statement even if he had allowed me. Instead I closed my eyes finally letting the tears I had been holding back out.

A few more days of riding and the red marks on my face had become full blown bruises. My left eye was completely swollen shut. I knew I looked like a walking disaster. To make matters worse I could hear a ruckus of a large crowd getting ever louder the closer we got. I realized it was a large city much bigger than any I had ever been in before.

A part of me was excited to see the place but another was fearful because the city I thought it could be had the monstrous Destroyer of Nations living within the city's walls. I wondered for the millionth time if I had the courage to try and attempt an escape but honestly I was too curious. Plus he had the faster horse, and being a more experienced rider he would surely catch me and the beating would no doubt be the end of me. I couldn't fathom what he had in store for me but I knew a lose lose scenario when I thought of them.

Instead I swallowed my fear, took a deep breath and squared my shoulders. Doing my level best to ready myself for whatever laid ahead. When we approached the city gates the guards stopped us out of everyone. They addressed my father but their eyes were on me and the bruises that littered my face and body.

"What happened to her?" The head man asked, gesturing to me.

"My slave needed to be taught." he said, making my jaw drop as my anxiety peaked, finally realizing what he intended to do with me.

I watched the soldier's jaws clench almost as one, the head guard addressed his men, "Take them off the horses. Empress Xena wants to address this issue herself."

I swallowed hard as the men gently removed me from the tall horse and roughly pulled him from his horse making him fall to the ground. Another man took the horses' leads and began leading them away to a nearby stable.

"Get up swine!" The soldier who had pulled my father down kicked him once as my dad tried to plug his bleeding nose.

"Please don't hurt him!" I took a step towards the soldier assaulting my dad only to feel the steely grip of the soldier who had been addressing me. I looked up at him and saw that he was looking at the other soldier and gesturing for him to stand down.

Still I swallowed at the insanity of my upcoming introduction with the Empress of the world to say that I was purely frightened would be an understatement, "Please there must be some kind of mistake. What would the empress want with us?"

"Gabrielle, please just follow us, we promise no further harm will come to you." The soldier bowed and stuck his arm in the direction he wanted me to go.

For the life of me I couldn't wrap my mind around the fact that a soldier from Xena's army knew my name. Let alone that he was bowing to me as though I was a dignitary of Xena herself. Swallowing, I nervously brushed my blond hair back deciding to take the leap and meet the empress from my stories in person. My first few steps were taken on shaky feet. I was so nervous that I couldn't get my feet to work properly. The people in the streets cleared our path and watched us as we went by. I started to feel like a freak on display for the world to see. With every step closer to the large castle my brain already moving faster than the speed of light began thinking all the more faster.

The man who used to be my father was being physically pulled behind me, and every time I looked back the guards would forcefully push his head down not letting our eyes so much as glimpse each other's. Deciding it wise not to look at him anymore I lowered my own head and just followed the men's direction.

A part of the way through the massive city I failed to notice that the guards who had been beside me suddenly stopped and came to attention leaving me to continue along before I suddenly ran head first into a soft yet immovable object. My jaw fell open as I took in the shiny boots worn by said object. Slowly with my working eye I followed the long legs and even shinier sword up to the armored torso until finally I was looking up into the bluest set of eyes I had ever seen in my life. I didn't need an introduction to know who I had just bumped into.

"I'm so sorry I wasn't looking where I was going." I stammered, attempting to look away as my feet stumbled backwards but her soft hand on my chin halted my escape.

Her other hand came up to my face and I couldn't help my fearful flinch. I was so certain that I was about to be struck that I closed my only working eye in an unconscious attempt to protect it. I had shut my right eye so fast that I almost missed the hurt look claiming a place on the empress' face. I was more confused than ever and quickly reopened my right eye taking in the now angry look the empress was giving my father.

"Bring him." The empress said, bluntly to her guards, then she turned those quickly softening blue eyes back to me, "Will you come with me?"

"Yes, of course Empress." I still wasn't sure what was going on, but something inside of me suddenly felt brand new. I couldn't place the foreign feeling at the time but it was the feeling of being home after years of a hard life without one.

The empress put her hot hand on my lower back as if to hold me upright. I couldn't take my eyes off of her and as we walked back to the castle I got the impression that she was struggling with some of the same inabilities.

"Wake up girl!" my father's voice was angry as though he had been attempting to wake me up for awhile already. A swift kick to my unprotected stomach was what finally did the trick.

I coughed as I grabbed my now injured belly each intake and outburst of air felt like molten magma was coursing through my swollen face and body. Every morning since the day we had left home he had woken me up in much the same manner. Most of the time the kick was in the small of my lower back so I was honestly grateful for the reprieve.

With his back turned to me he all but yelled at me saying, "I said get up! Roll up my bedroll and ready the horses! We'll be out of each other's lives today and I'm honestly out of patience for you."

I bit off my retort that would only serve to gain me more pain and instead I tried to remember the dream I was just immersed in. Wondering why it had all felt so real. I stumbled to my feet still gasping from the intense pain I was now going through. Everything aches, including my heart that mourned the loss of such a sweet dream. It was almost enough to make me want to just die on the spot.

As we rode into the city I couldn't believe the similarity to my dream. The only real difference was the fact that we made it past the city's large walls without being stopped by the guards and we still had our horses trotting happily beside us. I walked a few paces behind him at first but as the city streets became more crowded he made me walk ahead of him. I suppose it was easier to keep track of me since before that he had been looking back every other heartbeat to ensure I was still following him.

A sentiment that was not exactly far off. There had been more than a few times I had tried to gather up the courage to just drop the reins and run. Alass for whatever reason beyond even my own understanding I had trudged along after him. Now that he was behind me I had only the city in front of me and I was already hooked. Suddenly a group of happily chuckling kids ran ahead of me squealing happily as they chased each other. I couldn't help the twinkle of my eye or the delighted smile that overcame all of the pain I felt as I followed their quick progress through the crowds.

They suddenly stopped running as they came upon a gathering crowd the center of which was a dark haired woman who was staring in my direction. Nervously returning my smile. When I noted the striking blue eyes, I came to a sudden stop. Could she really have the same stunning eyes from my dream this morning? I ran a panicked hand through my disheveled hair hoping I didn't look near as bad as I knew I did.

My stunned state was interrupted however when my so-called father pushed me from behind with his boot. The force of it knocked me yet again to the ground. With my face in the dirt I couldn't help but think that I was becoming way more accustomed to the position than I ever wanted to be. A part of me wished that the striking woman I had just been staring at had missed my forced tear from grace. I didn't want her to feel bad for me.

I used my shaky hands to attempt to get up only to have another boot strike my left side hitting me directly in my ribs, "You stupid girl! I told you I have no more patience for you, didn't I?"

Another swift kick in the same spot and I was coughing up blood into the dusty street. Another kick rolled me onto my back. Mid-flight I spotted the now enraged looking raven haired woman running ominously towards us and just as I locked eyes on her she ordered me to look out. Making me look up just before my fathers booted foot came rushing down towards my face. Reacting as fast as I could I did my best to try and cover my face.

The hard kick landed in the palm of my cupped hands and I was at least able to slow down and cushion the stomp. I watched while the world became narrower as darkness overcame my vision just as the woman's hand locked around his throat before he could land the next blow. She growled and quickly pushed two of her fingers on each hand into his neck just above his collarbone. Dropping him down to his knees in front of her. His whole demeanor had changed in the span of a single second. Her eyes were wild as she locked eyes with my own faltering eye. Finally no longer able to withstand the pain I mercifully passed out from it. Somehow feeling safer than I ever had before.

To be continued