SPACE: 1999 YEAR 2

JOURNEY BEHIND CLOSED DOORS

SECTION NINE: A Quiet Becoming

Tony had just left Command Center, headed towards his quarters now that the threat to Alpha had been averted. Despite that relief, his mind was heavy with thoughts. Trepidation filled him as he tried to figure out the best way to approach Maya. He couldn't very well let her think that he was mad at her, not when the kiss had been his mistake.

Genuinely frustrated and angry with himself, he veered towards one of the canteen areas instead of the corridor towards his quarters. He needed a cup of coffee and some time to sit alone and sort out his thoughts.

He didn't notice Helena Russell making her way toward Command Center. She slowed her steps as she caught him entering the canteen. Something in his posture stopped her. It wasn't the Red Alert – John had already given the all-clear. She studied him for a moment. His shoulders showed visible tension.

Helena frowned as she watched him, not trying to intrude but, as Chief Medical Officer, she had an obligation to notice. To care. And right now, something told her that Verdeschi was carrying a troubling mental weight.

Deciding she couldn't ignore it, she pivoted and headed towards the coffee station instead. She grabbed a mug as she watched him getting his drink. He didn't acknowledge her presence, his focus entirely on the steam of dark liquid filling his cup. She hesitated for just a moment, sensing that there was a dark storm brewing beneath the surface.

"Tony, is everything alright?" she asked softly.

He turned to look at her, giving her a much weaker version of his usual smile. His dark eyes clearly indicated that something was on his mind. He shrugged. "Oh, just trying to figure some things out." He picked up his mug and moved a little away from the coffee pot.

As she poured her own cup, she noted that. If he had wanted to be left truly alone, he would have kept moving. But he was just standing there, looking down into his drink.

"I just need a few minutes, and some coffee," he said, his voice calm but heavy with an undercurrent she couldn't ignore. There was a restrained edge to it, a polite firmness that conveyed more than the words themselves. It wasn't dismissive. Tony wasn't being unkind, but it was a clear message. This is my issue.

Helena immediately understood the unspoken boundary in his tone. It was his way of telling her, gently but unmistakably, that whatever was troubling him was something he wasn't ready to share. As if Tony Verdeschi ever really shared anything deeply troubling him.

She offered him a small, understanding smile. She reached out and patted his arm lightly. "You know where to find me if you need anything," she told him, her tone warm but respectful of the line he had drawn.

Verdeschi nodded, then moved away to one of the small tables along the wall. He chose one on the side of the room with no other people.

Helena was going to exit, take her coffee and continue to Command Center but a thought suddenly came to mind. She turned and walked back to him.
"Tony, if you wouldn't mind coming by Medical when you're done, you could help me with those containers for Maya. They're ready for her."

He looked up and gave her a genuine, Verdeschi smile. "Yeah, sure Helena. I won't be long, maybe about ten minutes."

"Wonderful. See you in a bit," she said, her tone warm with appreciation.

Tony watched her walk away, feeling as though he could breathe just a bit easier. At least with Helena there, he wouldn't have to broach the topic of the kiss with Maya. At least, not for a time anyhow. Maybe by then, he'd figure out what the hell was wrong with him and, if he was really lucky, he'd have something half-intelligent to tell the poor girl.

He took another sip of his coffee, feeling just a bit less burdened.

As promised, Tony went straight to Medical Center after almost finishing his coffee. He was happily surprised to see the containers for Maya had grown. More clothes, more things. Helena, chatting with Ben off to the side, turned and gave him a smile of acknowledgment.

He waited while she finished with Vincent, then she joined him.

"I'm glad I asked for your help," she said, motioning to the containers.

"Looks good," Tony replied. "I just hope Maya can use some of it."

"I'm sure she will. This one's heavier," she added, nodding to the one spilling over with clothes.

Tony bent and picked it up easily. "I got it."

Helena grabbed the other.

"Off we go," Tony said, holding the door for her before following into the corridor.

When they arrived at his quarters, the first thing they noticed was Maya's absence but what caught Tony's eye was the room. The bed had been made, pillows fluffed, the extra blanket folded neatly at the foot like room service had been through.

Even the tray of used coffee cups had been collected and arranged. The space looked... tended to.

"Maya?" Tony called, setting his container on the table. Helena echoed him.

He glanced toward the bathroom. The door was shut.

"Maya?" he called again.

A faint voice replied. Then the door opened, and Maya stepped into view. Her eyes passed briefly over Tony, but her face lit up when she saw Helena.

"Dr. Russell," she greeted warmly.

"We brought you some things. Real girl clothes," Helena said with a playful grin.

Tony rolled his eyes. "Geez, am I ever going to hear the end of that?"

Maya's face sparkled as she saw the containers.

"Some of the ladies offered what they thought you might need," Helena explained.

Maya's expression softened with emotion. She clearly understood what this gesture meant. As Psychon had neared the end, personal possessions had become treasured. Ability to replace things limited and Maya knew the same must be true on Alpha. That anyone here would give something away, just for her, was a gesture that went beyond words.

"I must thank them all," she whispered, eyes misty.

Helena waved her forward. "Come see."

Tony sensed this was about to become the Alphan equivalent of a shopping spree. He grabbed some files and retreated to the couch. "If you ladies will excuse me… I've got reports to review."

He chuckled quietly as he sat down. Neither woman had responded. It would seem that he had become invisible in his own home. As he flipped a few pages through the one of the files, he realized that Psychon women were not any more immune to the thrill of new items than Earth women. He smiled as he began reading the information that he had been looking for.

"And Linda had a lot of hair stuff," Helena told Maya. "She has long hair too. New brush, comb, ponytail holders. She said to let her know if there's ever anything special you want to do with your hair, she probably has what you'll need."

"Oh, this is perfect," Maya beamed, hugging the brush package to her.

"And this you might like wearing off-duty," Helena continued, holding up a small yellow dress.

"It's so short!" Maya gasped.

Tony's eyes, despite all his efforts, left his report. Yeah, that was short.

An image of Maya in the dress came to mind - long legs, the top daringly unzipped. He mentally slapped himself. Stay out of trouble, Verdeschi, he reminded himself. Forever stay away from women, forever stay out of trouble.

He buried his face in his report again.

"Maya," Helena asked gently, "Did women on Psychon ever wear short dresses? Or were they all long, like your beautiful gown?"

Maya smiled gratefully at Helena's tone. "I may have worn something that short as a child. But grown women… no."

Helena laughed. "Promise me, you'll try it sometime. You might feel daring."

Maya looked at the fabric again. "Perhaps," she said softly, though it sounded like she wasn't at all convinced.

"Maya, you have to tell me more about Psychon fashion sometime," Helena added wistfully, placing a gentle hand on Maya's arm. "That was always my weakness. Dress shopping."

"I will," Maya promised. "Oh, what are these?"

Tony's eyes betrayed him again.

Maya was holding up a pair of blue jeans, her fingers brushing over the unfamiliar fabric with fascination.

"They're called blue jeans," Helena explained with a smile. "Very common."

"It wasn't customary for Earth women to wear dresses all the time?" Maya asked, clearly intrigued with human clothing. Despite the difference in length, these looked similar to what she had seen Tony and the girl wearing in the pictures. Quickly, she attempted to slide that thought to the very back recesses of her mind.

Helena shook her head. "Before we left Earth, women wore whatever they wanted. Jeans, dresses, shorts, skirts."

Maya nodded slowly, absorbing this quiet freedom. So many differences, so many things that she was unfamiliar with. But she was sure, in time, she would learn.

"Beautiful dresses like yours," Helena continued, "were reserved for special occasions." Her hand dipped into the container and pulled out a soft, fluid green sundress.

Maya's eyes widened. "It's beautiful. The colors swirl."

"It's a sundress," Helena said warmly, holding it up. "Perfect for warm nights and summer parties, though we won't get those here on the moon," she said with a gentle smile. "With your hair, I know it would look stunning."

She didn't mention the memory that clung to the fabric like faded perfume. A summer party, one of the last before the universe had ripped Lee from her. The ill-fated Astro Seven mission. She didn't even know how the dress had made it to Alpha, she hadn't realized that she had it here. It had been tucked away, in a container of clothing. When she had found it, something had stopped her from putting it back. Maybe it was the memory. Maybe it was something else.

Helena smiled softly, even as something inside her flickered with an old ache. The dress no longer felt like it was hers anymore. She knew that the Psychon needed something soft, something beautiful, something feminine. Something to remind Maya that the world wasn't just loss and survival. The day would come when that part of Maya, the part that remembered how to feel like herself, like a vibrant young woman, would return.

Maya ran her fingers along the fabric, her expression reverent. There was something almost alive about it, as though the dress remembered the life it once danced through. She found herself hoping it would fit. Even if she wasn't ready to wear something so bold, it felt like the dress wanted to belong to her.

Back at the couch, Tony forced himself to refocus. He should not be concerned with the clothes that Maya might, or might not, choose to wear in the future. Cold shower, he reminded himself. Think cold, a very cold shower. Perhaps meditation. He cleared his throat. Several times.

Helena turned. "Are you okay, Tony?"

He blinked. "Yeah. Just need a drink." A real one. Maybe a couple, he thought. "I've also got to run these reports down to Petrov."

"Perfect timing," Helena grinned. "We're getting to the unmentionables."

Tony froze. Damn her. She knew. She knew he'd been sneaking peeks.

He stood and made his way to the worktable, mischief flickering in his eyes. Lifting his fingers in air quotes, he grinned. "Pity. The unmentionables are the best part."

Helena laughed. Maya blushed.

Tony grabbed the tray of used coffee cups. "I'll leave you ladies to it."

He paused at the door, turned back with a smile that would've melted steel. "For the record, I grew up with a mother and two younger sisters."

He nodded at the containers. "I've seen my share of unmentionables."

Then he left – grinning like a man who knew exactly what he was doing.

After Tony's departure, Helena gently coaxed Maya into trying on a simple outfit. When the Psychon stepped out of the bathroom, she looked entirely transformed. Jeans, a black blouse, soft little flats, and her long hair pulled back in a neat ponytail. It was a modest change, but striking, nonetheless. Yet even with the new clothing, her unease lingered. She wasn't just wearing jeans; she was wearing uncertainty.

"Oh, Maya, that really does look good on you," Helena said encouragingly.

"Are you sure Dr. Russell?" Maya asked, brushing her hands down her legs.

Helena moved to sit on the couch and patted the space beside her. "Come sit. First of all, we're friends now, Maya. You can call me Helena."

"But using your professional title is more respectful," Maya began, her tone earnest as she joined Helena on the couch.

"Only if we were strangers. And we're not strangers any longer." She reached over and patted Maya's arm lightly. "Doctor's orders," she added with a warm smile.

"Okay," Maya relented. "I would love to be friends, Doctor..." she smiled almost shyly, then corrected herself. "Helena."

Helena's tone softened. "So, tell me. How are you really doing?"

Maya looked at Helena, her expression clearly troubled.

"I don't really know," Maya began. "None of this seems real. I don't know how I'm supposed to be doing, or what I'm supposed to be feeling."

She sighed sadly, emotions swirling within her. "I would prefer to not feel anything," she said almost bitterly.

Helena leaned in, her voice gentle. "It's okay to feel lost, normal to feel confused, Maya. I'd be more worried about you if you weren't. Just take it one step at a time."

Maya nodded slowly, her eyes reflecting her inner turmoil. "It's just everything is… so different."

Helena smiled warmly. "Well, you've already started making friends. Me, John, Alan, Bill…Tony."

At the mention of Tony's name, an odd, fleeting expression crossed Maya's face. An expression that Helena Russell did not miss.

"Maya, has everything been okay with Tony?" Helena asked cautiously.

Maya hesitated. She couldn't talk about the kiss. She knew it meant nothing, especially after seeing those photos. It had just been a momentary lapse in Tony's judgement.

"Tony has been very kind," Maya told her. "He's tried to make me feel welcome. He's polite, respectful…patient." She shrugged. "Everything's just…different."

"Maybe you shouldn't have stayed here last night," Helena said in an almost apologetic tone, sensing that perhaps there was more behind Maya's words. She knew that now was not the time to press the girl further on it.

"But Tony was insistent on keeping you safe until we had a chance to tell everyone that you were here and why you were here. But now everyone knows that you helped us all. And your own quarters will be ready shortly," Helena told her.

Maya sighed. "I don't know," she said because truthfully, she really didn't know. She really didn't know what to say or to do on this base filled with people on a rogue moon from a planet that she'd never heard of.

Helena didn't push. "We all went through an adjustment, when the moon broke orbit. It takes time Maya. But you will find your place."

"I hope so," Maya said. "Everyone has been so kind. I just want…I need to feel useful Helena."

"And you will be," Helena assured her. "You have so much to offer."

Maya's eyes misted, but this time, hope shimmered beneath the sadness. "Thank you… Helena."

Helena squeezed her arm. "Once your quarters are ready, things will feel more normal. And I'm always here if you need to talk. About anything."

"I appreciate that. I really do."

"Come on," Helena said. "Let's see what else is in those containers."

Maya smiled. "Yes. Let's."