It's felt like a lifetime since I was at this keyboard! I had a good time away, but I'm really glad to be back now and writing this for you all!
We had only turned a few corners away from McGonagall's classroom when Hermione came running up to us, looking delighted about something.
"You two, come with me quickly, there's something incredible I need to show you!" she exclaimed
"Bloody hell mate!" I said, "calm down, what's going on?"
"I'll explain in a bit, come on, we need to get Harry and Ron!" and without wasting any more time, she turned and ran back up the corridor, briefly turning her head and beckoning us to follow impatiently.
Demelza and I exchanged a glance, then followed. We caught up to Harry and Ron as they were opening the portrait hole. They turned around upon hearing our approach.
"Harry!" Hermione panted, skidding to a halt beside him (the Fat Lady stared down at her, eyebrows raised). "Harry, you've got to come — you've got to come, the most amazing thing's happened — please —" She seized Harry's arm and started to try to drag him back along the corridor.
"What's the matter?" Harry said.
"I'll show you when we get there — oh come on, quick —"
Harry looked around at Ron; he looked back at Harry, intrigued.
"Okay," Harry said, starting off back down the corridor with us, Ron hurrying to keep up.
"Oh don't mind me!" the Fat Lady called irritably after them. "Don't apologize for bothering me! I'll just hang here, wide open, until you get back, shall I?"
"Yeah, thanks!" Ron shouted over his shoulder
"Hermione, where are we going?" Harry asked, after she had led us down through six floors, and started down the marble staircase into the entrance hall.
"You'll see, you'll see in a minute!" said Hermione excitedly.
She turned left at the bottom of the staircase and hurried toward the door through which Cedric Diggory had gone the night after the Goblet of Fire had regurgitated his and Harry's names. We had never been through here before. We followed Hermione down a flight of stone steps, but instead of ending up in a gloomy underground passage like the one that led to Snape's dungeon, we found ourselves in a broad stone corridor, brightly lit with torches, and decorated with cheerful paintings that were mainly of food.
Instantly understanding came to me, and I turned to Demelza, rolling my eyes. She nodded back. Harry clearly understood too, because he said "Oh hang on . . wait a minute, Hermione. . . ."
"What?" She turned around to look at him, anticipation all over her face.
"I know what this is about," said Harry.
"So do we, and it's not going to work" added Demelza
Harry nudged Ron and pointed to the painting just behind Hermione. It showed a gigantic silver fruit bowl.
"Hermione!" said Ron, cottoning on. "You're trying to rope us into that spew stuff again!"
"No, no, I'm not!" she said hastily. "And it's not spew, Ron —"
"Changed the name, have you?" said Ron, frowning at her. "What are we now, then, the House-Elf Liberation Front?"
Demelza and I laughed and Hermione scowled at us.
"I'm not barging into that kitchen and trying to make them stop work, I'm not doing it —" Ron continued
"I'm not asking you to!" Hermione said impatiently. "I came down here just now, to talk to them all, and I found — oh come on, I want to show you!"
"If that's not what you want, what could you possibly want?" I asked, but Hermione ignored me
She seized Harry's arm again, pulled him in front of the picture of the giant fruit bowl, stretched out her forefinger, and tickled the huge green pear. It began to squirm, chuckling, and suddenly turned into a large green door handle. Hermione seized it, pulled the door open, and pushed Harry hard in the back, forcing him inside.
We followed and briefly saw an enormous, high-ceilinged room, large as the Great Hall above it, with mounds of glittering brass pots and pans heaped around the stone walls, and a great brick fireplace at the other end, when something small hurtled toward Harry, from the middle of the room, squealing, "Harry Potter, sir! Harry Potter!" Next second, the squealing elf hit him hard in the midriff.
"D-Dobby?" Harry gasped
"It is Dobby, sir, it is!" squealed the voice from somewhere around his navel. "Dobby has been hoping and hoping to see Harry Potter, sir, and Harry Potter has come to see him, sir!"
"So this is Dobby" I muttered, more to myself than anyone else. I'd heard Harry talk about this particular house elf before, but I'd never actually met him. He was clearly a standout though, because unlike most house elves which wear rags, he was wearing a very strange assortment of garments. He was wearing a tea cozy for a hat, on which he had pinned a number of bright badges; a tie patterned with horseshoes over a bare chest, a pair of what looked like children's shorts, and odd socks, one black, one striped pink and orange.
"Dobby, what're you doing here?" Harry said in amazement.
"Dobby has come to work at Hogwarts, sir!" Dobby squealed excitedly. "Professor Dumbledore gave Dobby and Winky jobs, sir!"
"Winky?" said Harry. "She's here too?"
"Yes, sir, yes!" said Dobby. We followed him off into the kitchen between the four long wooden tables that stood there. Each of these tables, we noticed as he passed them, was positioned exactly beneath the four House tables above, in the Great Hall.
At least a hundred little elves were standing around the kitchen, beaming, bowing, and curtsying as Dobby led us past them. They were all wearing the same uniform: a tea towel stamped with the Hogwarts crest, and tied, as Winky's had been, like a toga. Dobby stopped in front of the brick fireplace and pointed.
"Winky, sir!" he said.
Winky was sitting on a stool by the fire. Unlike Dobby, she had obviously not foraged for clothes. She was wearing a neat little skirt and blouse with a matching blue hat, which had holes in it for her large ears. However, while every one of Dobby's strange collection of garments was so clean and well cared for that it looked brandnew, Winky was plainly not taking care of her clothes at all. There were soup stains all down her blouse and a burn in her skirt.
"Hello, Winky," said Harry.
Winky's lip quivered. Then she burst into tears, which spilled out of her great brown eyes and splashed down her front, just as they had done at the Quidditch World Cup.
"My god" Demelza said "she is not in a good place"
"You could say that again" I replied
"Excuse me missers" said Dobby to us in an offended tone "Hogwarts is a great place to be!"
"That's not what we meant-" Demelza began, but she bit her lip and fell silent. Clearly house-elves didn't understand verbal expressions like that, and how was she to explain it?
"Oh dear," said Hermione. "Winky, don't cry, please don't . . ."
But Winky cried harder than ever. Dobby, on the other hand, beamed up at Harry.
"Would Harry Potter like a cup of tea?" he squeaked loudly, over Winky's sobs.
"Er — yeah, okay," said Harry. Instantly, about six house-elves came trotting up behind him, bearing a large silver tray laden with a teapot, cups for all of us, a milk jug, and a large plate of biscuits.
"Good service!" Ron said, in an impressed voice. Hermione frowned at him, but Demelza and I decided to take advantage.
"Can you bring us some of that treacle tart too?" I asked one of them
"And the chocolate mousses?" said Demelza. Those were her favourite.
Hermione scowled at us "No, you don't need-" but she was too late
"Certainly misses!" it said and after bowing low, it rushed off with the others.
Hermione folded her arms in frustration.